FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Nice thread.
Nice thread.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I've made this thread numerous times, but I'm noticing a few people twisting my words and jumping to the wrong conclusion when I'm trying to be nice and supportive.
There are definitely too many threads that turn toxic, or the people starting the thread are being a bit highly about something they didn't need to be difficult about.
Let's just have a nice, pleasant thread where you can day anything that is pleasant, be it profound or nonsensical.
I'm having a tough time in life and I come here to find friendly people
Lots of you have been absolutely wonderful to me, but there are some who feel the need to stick the knife in and twist it a few times for good measure
Be kind! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I've made this thread numerous times, but I'm noticing a few people twisting my words and jumping to the wrong conclusion when I'm trying to be nice and supportive.
There are definitely too many threads that turn toxic, or the people starting the thread are being a bit highly about something they didn't need to be difficult about.
Let's just have a nice, pleasant thread where you can day anything that is pleasant, be it profound or nonsensical.
I'm having a tough time in life and I come here to find friendly people
Lots of you have been absolutely wonderful to me, but there are some who feel the need to stick the knife in and twist it a few times for good measure
Be kind!"
Ignore all the stupid typos. I can't see my keypad properly so I just type and hope for the best! |
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Good morning, I always prefer a kindly word and the hand of friendship over the bitter and snidy retorts that some posters are prone to posting. So I will hope everybody has a wonderful day and the sun shines on you all. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't know whether this is in reference to your recent thread "adoration", where you asked people to compliment you. But in that thread, you received a mixture of compliments and also well meaning advice and offers of support, and you didn't reply to a single person.
Kindness does work both ways, I think. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't know whether this is in reference to your recent thread "adoration", where you asked people to compliment you. But in that thread, you received a mixture of compliments and also well meaning advice and offers of support, and you didn't reply to a single person.
Kindness does work both ways, I think."
Exactly  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't know whether this is in reference to your recent thread "adoration", where you asked people to compliment you. But in that thread, you received a mixture of compliments and also well meaning advice and offers of support, and you didn't reply to a single person.
Kindness does work both ways, I think."
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Good morning O.P.
I'm wishing you the best of days. The kind of day that brings a smile to your face.
If I had to choose whether to be 'kind' (quotations cos kindness like all else is subjective ) or 'cynical' ( quotations cos one woman's cynicism is another woman's wisdom ) I wouldn't choose.
I'm both. I'm kind when need be not because it's a dictat from ever softening increasingly cloying , suffocating culture.
One thing I wouldn't do is argue with or try to give a lesson to or attempt some kind of playground 'I will cos I can' action against someone who has made their emotional state clear on here many times.
They'd have to be one socially emotionally inept self righteous cunt to do that and anyone who backed such posts up can only be on heat - surely.
So whilst I am not going to post a schmaltzy loved up post I do wish you success with this one Mollypop ..... May the twats stay off it and start their own thread. xxxx
Mind you i'll prob join that one.
Fear not the haters, they'd kick the crutches from under Tiny Tim if he limped. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was reminded this morning about the Socratic test on stories (gossip). Maybe posters in other threads should consider this...
1. Is it true? If you don't know and are passing on heresay then question whether you should.
2. Is it good? If you are passing on bad news or bad thoughts, are they of value?
3. Is it of use? Will the story or information you have be of any positive benefit, if not then why share?
Otherwise we are likely to be passing on bad or negative information or stories that we don't know whether they are true or not, and that are unlikely to be of use or benefit to the listener/reader.
Whilst this shouldn't prohibit banter, it should avoid shaming and negativity...
just a thought
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"I've made this thread numerous times, but I'm noticing a few people twisting my words and jumping to the wrong conclusion when I'm trying to be nice and supportive.
There are definitely too many threads that turn toxic, or the people starting the thread are being a bit highly about something they didn't need to be difficult about.
Let's just have a nice, pleasant thread where you can day anything that is pleasant, be it profound or nonsensical.
I'm having a tough time in life and I come here to find friendly people
Lots of you have been absolutely wonderful to me, but there are some who feel the need to stick the knife in and twist it a few times for good measure
Be kind!"
I’m learning more and more about the social side of swinging and am enjoying actually getting to know people. There are some dickheads on here, but there are also a lot of really nice, kind people too. I’m happy to be a friendly person for you or anyone to chat with, especially if you’re having a tough time in life, if it will help or make you feel better  |
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Slight flaw S and S .......
I agree with the test and have done for many years ....... howeverrrrrrrrr
The type of person who 'thrives' on negative account of others or needs to diminish others in order to feel ...... just WONT or CANT see the use of following such tests.....
It's like pissing in the wind...... ( as Socrates said ) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's like pissing in the wind...... ( as Socrates said )"
Were those his exact words? lol
But you are right!
Unfortunately it's like safety videos and the like, those that really need to take heed won't!
But if the rest of us can be nice that's a great start.
I also think humour is an interesting area. Much banter can be based on humour, and much humour can be based on putting down a minority... blonde or. Irish jokes.
Therefore some might joke in banter, but cause offence to the very wide and open audience on fab, and in addition we all know there are professional offence takers on here it would seem.
So maybe as well as being nice, we all need to try and "react nicely" too. Not take offence where none was intended, and may be Urr on the side of tollerance...
I wonder what Socrates had to say about tolerance... |
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"I was reminded this morning about the Socratic test on stories (gossip). Maybe posters in other threads should consider this...
1. Is it true? If you don't know and are passing on heresay then question whether you should.
2. Is it good? If you are passing on bad news or bad thoughts, are they of value?
3. Is it of use? Will the story or information you have be of any positive benefit, if not then why share?
Otherwise we are likely to be passing on bad or negative information or stories that we don't know whether they are true or not, and that are unlikely to be of use or benefit to the listener/reader.
Whilst this shouldn't prohibit banter, it should avoid shaming and negativity...
just a thought
"
Best thing I’ve read on here for an age. That’s a thread in itself |
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"It's like pissing in the wind...... ( as Socrates said )
Were those his exact words? lol
But you are right!
Unfortunately it's like safety videos and the like, those that really need to take heed won't!
But if the rest of us can be nice that's a great start.
I also think humour is an interesting area. Much banter can be based on humour, and much humour can be based on putting down a minority... blonde or. Irish jokes.
Therefore some might joke in banter, but cause offence to the very wide and open audience on fab, and in addition we all know there are professional offence takers on here it would seem.
So maybe as well as being nice, we all need to try and "react nicely" too. Not take offence where none was intended, and may be Urr on the side of tollerance...
I wonder what Socrates had to say about tolerance... "
'Reacting nicely' is a great point......
Far too many 'knee jerkers' cause the ructions but then ..... what would they do for a cuddle ? |
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"It's like pissing in the wind...... ( as Socrates said )
Were those his exact words? lol
But you are right!
Unfortunately it's like safety videos and the like, those that really need to take heed won't!
But if the rest of us can be nice that's a great start.
I also think humour is an interesting area. Much banter can be based on humour, and much humour can be based on putting down a minority... blonde or. Irish jokes.
Therefore some might joke in banter, but cause offence to the very wide and open audience on fab, and in addition we all know there are professional offence takers on here it would seem.
So maybe as well as being nice, we all need to try and "react nicely" too. Not take offence where none was intended, and may be Urr on the side of tollerance...
I wonder what Socrates had to say about tolerance... "
well put |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You really shouldn't worry yourself about things that random strangers on the internet, who you will never even meet, have to say..it's a bit like that annoying fly.. |
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By *tue555Man
over a year ago
Passed Beyond Reach |
Nice thread that turns nasty
Do people actually practice what they preach in these kinda threads and many others? just a question really
Self appointed
Long term Cynic, Professional Offence taker (Wish I did get paid), Negative poster, keyboard warrior, all around despicable person, arrogant, crusader, white knight, elitist.
Oooooops I was writing my CV
 |
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By *tue555Man
over a year ago
Passed Beyond Reach |
"Kindness is sexier than sneering cynicism.
Cynicism all the way for me - I'd rather be disliked for being me than being liked for a fake persona (this is a generalisation and not directed at anyone in particular)
Cynicism is suffering , I’ve never met a cynic that was truly happy about their life. Kindness and generosity when it’s undeserved might seem the most ridiculous thing to do , but it build bridges and heals "
You have now |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You really shouldn't worry yourself about things that random strangers on the internet, who you will never even meet, have to say..it's a bit like that annoying fly.."
It really sums it all up - well for me anyway! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I was reminded this morning about the Socratic test on stories (gossip). Maybe posters in other threads should consider this...
1. Is it true? If you don't know and are passing on heresay then question whether you should.
2. Is it good? If you are passing on bad news or bad thoughts, are they of value?
3. Is it of use? Will the story or information you have be of any positive benefit, if not then why share?
Otherwise we are likely to be passing on bad or negative information or stories that we don't know whether they are true or not, and that are unlikely to be of use or benefit to the listener/reader.
Whilst this shouldn't prohibit banter, it should avoid shaming and negativity...
just a thought
"
This is excellent, particularly the heresay on here. Far too many people listen to others, rather than making their own judgements. |
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Unfortunately OP on here you will always get the negative Nellies/Norman's who will try and bring people down or misconstrue a comment and turn it around for their own agenda. Keep being you, never change...if strangers on here don't like it, what does it matter. This place is an escapism. It's real life that counts.
Have a good day xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Unfortunately OP on here you will always get the negative Nellies/Norman's who will try and bring people down or misconstrue a comment and turn it around for their own agenda. Keep being you, never change...if strangers on here don't like it, what does it matter. This place is an escapism. It's real life that counts.
Have a good day xx"
‘Negative nellies/ Normans’ doesn’t sound very kind.
#BeKind
You see how it’s done ? |
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"Unfortunately OP on here you will always get the negative Nellies/Norman's who will try and bring people down or misconstrue a comment and turn it around for their own agenda. Keep being you, never change...if strangers on here don't like it, what does it matter. This place is an escapism. It's real life that counts.
Have a good day xx
‘Negative nellies/ Normans’ doesn’t sound very kind.
#BeKind
You see how it’s done ? "
That was me being kind... I could've said a lot worse. |
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By *tue555Man
over a year ago
Passed Beyond Reach |
"Nice thread that turns nasty
Do people actually practice what they preach in these kinda threads and many others? just a question really
Self appointed
Long term Cynic, Professional Offence taker (Wish I did get paid), Negative poster, keyboard warrior, all around despicable person, arrogant, crusader, white knight, elitist.
Oooooops I was writing my CV
"
Please send all complaints to;
The mews
Ivory Towers
Lofty Hights
Far Above
Or just simply PM  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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But on the theme of niceness, if I could be anything I'd be a cloud.
So I could be one not raining on you in the winter.
The one providing exactly the correct ratio of transparency on a summers day to allow you to get tanned and be warm but not overheat or get skin cancer.
The one bandying other clouds together to create an area round you opposite to the weather conditions required for that howling cold wind we get.
And finally, that one that looks like a cock and balls when you look out of your window on a long journey and it makes you laugh and strangely aroused at the same time.
In short. If you want to be nice. Just think cloud. Simple. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Eat turkey. Be happy.
Heh, vegetarian here!
I'll eat your portion 
Fowl play 
No gobbles for you blossoms! 
Not my plucky day "
It's ok mate, just means you might have to spread your wings and look further afield. I've got your back mate, I believe you can fly  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I was reminded this morning about the Socratic test on stories (gossip). Maybe posters in other threads should consider this...
1. Is it true? If you don't know and are passing on heresay then question whether you should.
2. Is it good? If you are passing on bad news or bad thoughts, are they of value?
3. Is it of use? Will the story or information you have be of any positive benefit, if not then why share?
Otherwise we are likely to be passing on bad or negative information or stories that we don't know whether they are true or not, and that are unlikely to be of use or benefit to the listener/reader.
Whilst this shouldn't prohibit banter, it should avoid shaming and negativity...
just a thought
"
a damn fine thought
*inserts round of applause GIF |
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Nice isn't always what we think it is.
Sometimes we need to hear things we'd rather not, even though they may not be nice. But in the long run its the nicest thing to do for us.
Sometimes when we are depressed or having a rough time we only want to hear positive things. And sometimes this is what is needed but it's only ever a stop gap solution. But sometimes we need friends to tell you as it is, yes it can be tough but needed. If you don't have friends to chat with about these things, maybe seeing a counselor may be of use. |
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By *tue555Man
over a year ago
Passed Beyond Reach |
"Kindness is sexier than sneering cynicism.
It really is.
Women should lift each other up, not drag them down, for whatever reason they have.
This! And not just women… but all humans "
Yes but the reality people are only selectively nice or kind when it suits. Just the way it is |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Kindness is sexier than sneering cynicism.
It really is.
Women should lift each other up, not drag them down, for whatever reason they have.
This! And not just women… but all humans "
Yes, I stand corrected |
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By *rispyDuckMan
over a year ago
Chinese Takeaway near you |
"I've made this thread numerous times, but I'm noticing a few people twisting my words and jumping to the wrong conclusion when I'm trying to be nice and supportive.
There are definitely too many threads that turn toxic, or the people starting the thread are being a bit highly about something they didn't need to be difficult about.
Let's just have a nice, pleasant thread where you can day anything that is pleasant, be it profound or nonsensical.
I'm having a tough time in life and I come here to find friendly people
Lots of you have been absolutely wonderful to me, but there are some who feel the need to stick the knife in and twist it a few times for good measure
Be kind!"
Hope your Monday has been alright  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Nice isn't always what we think it is.
Sometimes we need to hear things we'd rather not, even though they may not be nice. But in the long run its the nicest thing to do for us.
Sometimes when we are depressed or having a rough time we only want to hear positive things. And sometimes this is what is needed but it's only ever a stop gap solution. But sometimes we need friends to tell you as it is, yes it can be tough but needed. If you don't have friends to chat with about these things, maybe seeing a counselor may be of use. "
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Unfortunately OP on here you will always get the negative Nellies/Norman's who will try and bring people down or misconstrue a comment and turn it around for their own agenda. Keep being you, never change...if strangers on here don't like it, what does it matter. This place is an escapism. It's real life that counts.
Have a good day xx
‘Negative nellies/ Normans’ doesn’t sound very kind.
#BeKind
You see how it’s done ?
That was me being kind... I could've said a lot worse."
I thought this was quite supportive really |
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