FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Do people get you?
Do people get you?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I've often found in my life that people just don't understand me, get what I'm about or where I'm coming from. People can often take what I say the wrong way, and as we know in life people often judge others based on seeing only a very small snippet of them.
I think Al Pacino once said you have to have been around him for 50 years to understand him. I feel like that and I'm not 30 yet! 
So the question is do you think people get you? |
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On the whole I think people do. I have quirks that probably seem odd to some but hey ho.
Growing up I found a culture of it's cool to be thick that I could never understand. If I found myself having to dumb myself down to fit into a crowd I quickly removed myself from said crowd. |
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Al Pacino is as egotistical and deluded as any other who thinks that people need to work hard to get into their mind and 'get them' because they are so so so so so complicated, sophisticated and terribly misunderstood....
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Think when we think nobody gets us, we need to think how many people do we get.
I've been guilty in the past of thinking nobody does and being upset about it. Friendship love etc isn't perfect and neither are we. When we accept that I think we live happier lives  |
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"I think most understand me and I get on with a lot of people .But there is only consider a small number actual friends .
"
This is how I feel.
I have three people I count as friends outside of my family. I don't know if they understand me all the time but they tolerate me at least  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Some do and they are the ones that matter. If someone isn’t going to take the time to get to know me and understand me I’m not going to take the time to have to explain. Life is way too short for that bs |
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By *tue555Man
over a year ago
Passed Beyond Reach |
"I've often found in my life that people just don't understand me, get what I'm about or where I'm coming from. People can often take what I say the wrong way, and as we know in life people often judge others based on seeing only a very small snippet of them.
I think Al Pacino once said you have to have been around him for 50 years to understand him. I feel like that and I'm not 30 yet!
So the question is do you think people get you?"
Judgement by people who know nothing about you is really one of the center attitudes on sites like this. If your outside a certain profile then people will not get you. People would rather see what they want to see, even if is lie than actually look for the truth. Which is the irony if these sites.
I have been accused of being many things over the years by people who know nothing about me or many cases have never even interacted with me. Moreover it is not just the accusers, it is the ones that perpetuate the the false accusations.
Unfortunately it's is prevalent on these kind of sites. I does not bother me the opinions of others especially as they do not know anything about me. Just rise above and don't concern yourself with those that don't get you.
Just be true to yourself and don't try to be something to others. The people that get you and the ones on your wavelength are the ones that I'd give my attention to.
Even now while typing the post fingers are poised on the keyboard for the FAB hatevine and eys rolls. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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This is a really interesting post and has made me think about myself and my past.
I used to feel like that.....I felt I didnt fit in, that I wasmisunderstood and maybe destined to be alone. Perhaps that contributed to how I approached life and to some of my life decisions.
Looking back now, I appreciate that actually a lot of that was about confidence, self esteem and communicating. They are all interlinked - low confidence meant that knock backs communicating and trying to meet peoole led to lower self esteem which reduces confidence which ment I tried communicating less etc etc.
I was also interested in different things to most people my age, lived in the country but went to school in a town, didnt have trendy clothes or much money. I was different and felt self conscious about it.
Now Im older and comfortable with being different - I still dont think most people get me though but it dosnt bother me as much. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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People just don't get that a spade is a spade I say it as I see it
I won't walk around the houses it is what it is
If you don't like the answer don't ask the question
Put up or shut up
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Think when we think nobody gets us, we need to think how many people do we get.
I've been guilty in the past of thinking nobody does and being upset about it. Friendship love etc isn't perfect and neither are we. When we accept that I think we live happier lives "
Very well put - we need to communicate if we want people to understand us |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've often found in my life that people just don't understand me, get what I'm about or where I'm coming from. People can often take what I say the wrong way, and as we know in life people often judge others based on seeing only a very small snippet of them.
I think Al Pacino once said you have to have been around him for 50 years to understand him. I feel like that and I'm not 30 yet!
So the question is do you think people get you?"
They do now, but yes i had to get to this age. I didnt really get myself til recently sure!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The thing is people judge others with out getting to know them Judged by looks and body shape not by the person they are we are not all perfect everyone has something but I don’t Judy anyone until I get know them we are not perfect in what we say or do even come across to others |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've often found in my life that people just don't understand me, get what I'm about or where I'm coming from. People can often take what I say the wrong way, and as we know in life people often judge others based on seeing only a very small snippet of them.
I think Al Pacino once said you have to have been around him for 50 years to understand him. I feel like that and I'm not 30 yet!
So the question is do you think people get you?"
Yes. Everything you just said, yes |
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I think we all make a certain amount of presumptions about people even if it’s just based on a person’s appearance?? On appearance alone I personally seem to provoke lots of questions particularly from new people but quite quickly and because I’m very honest and try my best to say it like it is we seem to reach a level of understanding?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The thing is people judge others with out getting to know them Judged by looks and body shape not by the person they are we are not all perfect everyone has something but I don’t Judy anyone until I get know them we are not perfect in what we say or do even come across to others "
People only judge others to hide the flaws in there own lives
They don't judge you as a person they judge you on your looks or how you act or dress
Because they have not got the balls to say it out right to your face
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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On here, I have some close friends, they know me and get me, people that don’t know me think they know me, and they are quite often right, because I am who I present myself to be, Then there are some who don’t know me, and they judge me and make assumptions. |
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"I've often found in my life that people just don't understand me, get what I'm about or where I'm coming from. People can often take what I say the wrong way, and as we know in life people often judge others based on seeing only a very small snippet of them.
I think Al Pacino once said you have to have been around him for 50 years to understand him. I feel like that and I'm not 30 yet!
So the question is do you think people get you?"
Many times I have been blokes on some fb sites because folk don’t get my humour |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've often found in my life that people just don't understand me, get what I'm about or where I'm coming from. People can often take what I say the wrong way, and as we know in life people often judge others based on seeing only a very small snippet of them.
I think Al Pacino once said you have to have been around him for 50 years to understand him. I feel like that and I'm not 30 yet!
So the question is do you think people get you?"
Yes they do face to face. I'm respected for it.
On media sites haha yeah less so  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Oh golly i think people just let me be me ans i am happy with that as i am the only me i will ever be .
If people dont its their problem not mine  "
 Here here! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m not sure I want most people to understand me. I like to keep people on their toes.
There is a person who understands me completely and that makes me very happy though |
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Anyone who knows me, gets me because I don't pretend to be anything other than I am and I make friends easily.
On the flip side though, there are quite a few people who I don't get at all and that sometimes leads to conflict and often involves a lot of eyerolling. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've often found in my life that people just don't understand me, get what I'm about or where I'm coming from. People can often take what I say the wrong way, and as we know in life people often judge others based on seeing only a very small snippet of them.
I think Al Pacino once said you have to have been around him for 50 years to understand him. I feel like that and I'm not 30 yet!
So the question is do you think people get you?
Judgement by people who know nothing about you is really one of the center attitudes on sites like this. If your outside a certain profile then people will not get you. People would rather see what they want to see, even if is lie than actually look for the truth. Which is the irony if these sites.
I have been accused of being many things over the years by people who know nothing about me or many cases have never even interacted with me. Moreover it is not just the accusers, it is the ones that perpetuate the the false accusations.
Unfortunately it's is prevalent on these kind of sites. I does not bother me the opinions of others especially as they do not know anything about me. Just rise above and don't concern yourself with those that don't get you.
Just be true to yourself and don't try to be something to others. The people that get you and the ones on your wavelength are the ones that I'd give my attention to.
Even now while typing the post fingers are poised on the keyboard for the FAB hatevine and eys rolls. "
The irony is...most can relate to this  |
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"Not very often.
It's rare that I come across anyone who's like me... I've had a couple of friends like that, my peas in a pod!
This is why I'm a bit of a loner."
I’d like you if you came across me  |
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By *opinovMan
over a year ago
Point Nemo, Cumbria |
Most people I meet day to day seem to think I'm a little odd, and those who know me say I am - so I suppose I must be. I am an aspie, after all.
I've always felt that others aren't much like me and getting myself across to them can be a real struggle at times. It can get me down if I allow it to, but then the way I am has also given me abilities that most others seem to lack - a level of creativity, focus, energy, intensity - which I guess makes up for it. |
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Yes In real life, I'm quite a social person with lots of friends who are happy to spend time with me
Fab is a different entity as I use it as a tool for sexual adventures not as a friendship maker, so I'd err more towards the no. But that changes when they meet me |
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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago
Maldon and Peterborough |
"Yes In real life, I'm quite a social person with lots of friends who are happy to spend time with me
Fab is a different entity as I use it as a tool for sexual adventures not as a friendship maker, so I'd err more towards the no. But that changes when they meet me "
And there was me - thinking we are friends.
Pfffffft. |
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I don’t get me so no one else has a chance of getting me. As I say to myself everyday. I’m me. Lump it or leave it. Just because I have a habit of wearing ladies clothes now and again doesn’t make me weird |
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By *an4funMan
over a year ago
london |
"I used to think people didn't get me. These days I wonder of perhaps it's me that doesn't get me, and perhaps I really am as much of an arse as people think."
I think there's some truth in this. Not that you're an arse but sometimes we are wrong about ourselves for various reasons and others can see us for who we are better than we can. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've often found in my life that people just don't understand me, get what I'm about or where I'm coming from. People can often take what I say the wrong way, and as we know in life people often judge others based on seeing only a very small snippet of them.
I think Al Pacino once said you have to have been around him for 50 years to understand him. I feel like that and I'm not 30 yet!
So the question is do you think people get you?"
I (Rick) have always felt that people just don't get me, and like the OP, I don't always understand why. I have ended up offending people when none was intended. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No, people definitely do not get me and too be honest I struggle to get them. I have put in the effort and try to understand why they live their lives in such a Conservative way (they do not do they same for me). They way I see it is that my life makes me happy and if they're happy doing their thing then cool.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Al Pacino is as egotistical and deluded as any other who thinks that people need to work hard to get into their mind and 'get them' because they are so so so so so complicated, sophisticated and terribly misunderstood....
"
We all like to think we're a little bit special ... |
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I think people go out of their way to misunderstand me online.
I think it's cause they think I am more handsome than k am and that I am a threat to their love interests.
Offline although most of my friends have moved away, hugely popular with people easily understanding me. Probably cause I'm not as good looking as my photos so they feel less threatened |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A lot of people don't get my sense of humour and my mannerism. I'm very dry and dark. I call it as it is, spade is a spade.
But the ones that do get and understand me are very loyal.
I'm like a dog and people who don't like dogs I don't trust. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My humour is not for everyone, it could be an Irish thing where we like to laugh and joke but some people just look at me like  "
This!
Not Irish though, although I think I've some in me!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think so, I don’t try and pretend I’m
Something I’m not and I hope I come across as not open to people. I’m guarded with what I tell people until I feel comfortable though |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Think when we think nobody gets us, we need to think how many people do we get.
I've been guilty in the past of thinking nobody does and being upset about it. Friendship love etc isn't perfect and neither are we. When we accept that I think we live happier lives ."
I think humans are very complex so it's difficult to truly understand someone else without getting to know them well and just clicking. I've always been quite an unusual person ( I don't mean that in an arrogant ' I'm interesting' way) , so I think I don't always articulate what I mean gery well. I'm sure I misunderstand a lot of people too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not very often.
It's rare that I come across anyone who's like me... I've had a couple of friends like that, my peas in a pod!
This is why I'm a bit of a loner."
I cant see you not having many friends..you come across as very intelligent and sexy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've often found in my life that people just don't understand me, get what I'm about or where I'm coming from. People can often take what I say the wrong way, and as we know in life people often judge others based on seeing only a very small snippet of them.
I think Al Pacino once said you have to have been around him for 50 years to understand him. I feel like that and I'm not 30 yet!
So the question is do you think people get you?"
To be honest I’m not overly bothered if they do or don’t |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Al Pacino is as egotistical and deluded as any other who thinks that people need to work hard to get into their mind and 'get them' because they are so so so so so complicated, sophisticated and terribly misunderstood....
We all like to think we're a little bit special ..."
I think I'm "special" but not in that way... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I live with High Function Autism, I've always had problems expressing my thoughts, opinions and feelings. I've spent my whole life feeling that nobody gets me. "
This is me. I think it explains a lot of how I react online, but I tend to be different in person. It's hard if you feel you aren't accepted as you, or people judge you because of a label.
I'm definitely more perceptive and self aware than most wpuld think though, but I take things to heart a lot when I shouldn't.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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F2F is so much richer than just verbal or written communication, so it's not surprising that there is so much misunderstanding
But i do think that sometimes people [deliberately +accidentally] take offense or over read something.. So they can white Knight /curry favour /cause mischief /appear the hero.... whatever their motivation
Fab is my escape, so i like to have fun, flirt, bounce around in the lighter threads spreading joy +happiness. My sense of humour is fast, dry and sarcastic...unfortunately I don't always have people on the same bus as me
There are a couple of forum posters that definitely do not get me and my humour ... But I'm ok with that. We are all unique. There are plenty of people that i bounce off with and have fun  |
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By *tue555Man
over a year ago
Passed Beyond Reach |
Nice to see the comments - isn't this what an adult forum should be about - people making an effort to actually get to know people and sharing, treating all with respect and not just the ones they are trying to get a shag from.
Rather than fuck, pint, avoid, Fab me, God look everybody how popular I am, woe is me threads.
Are these comments genuine and people try to make an effort or is it just another Spartacus thread? Forgotten tomorrow.
Yeah it's that sad fuckwhit lonely guy who negative posts all the time eye roll, hatevine lines are open |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Nope, not really. It's not that I feel misunderstood or anything, but I feel like you really need to know me on a deep personal level to understand why I am the way I am. I'm not sure if that makes sense. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Nice to see the comments - isn't this what an adult forum should be about - people making an effort to actually get to know people and sharing, treating all with respect and not just the ones they are trying to get a shag from.
Rather than fuck, pint, avoid, Fab me, God look everybody how popular I am, woe is me threads.
Are these comments genuine and people try to make an effort or is it just another Spartacus thread? Forgotten tomorrow.
Yeah it's that sad fuckwhit lonely guy who negative posts all the time eye roll, hatevine lines are open "
Own it lovey!!!! |
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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago
Maldon and Peterborough |
"Nice to see the comments - isn't this what an adult forum should be about - people making an effort to actually get to know people and sharing, treating all with respect and not just the ones they are trying to get a shag from.
Rather than fuck, pint, avoid, Fab me, God look everybody how popular I am, woe is me threads.
Are these comments genuine and people try to make an effort or is it just another Spartacus thread? Forgotten tomorrow.
Yeah it's that sad fuckwhit lonely guy who negative posts all the time eye roll, hatevine lines are open "
Pint.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Al Pacino is as egotistical and deluded as any other who thinks that people need to work hard to get into their mind and 'get them' because they are so so so so so complicated, sophisticated and terribly misunderstood....
We all like to think we're a little bit special ...
I think I'm "special" but not in that way... "
My "filters" caught that one as I wrote, but then I thought: Sod it! |
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By *ancer36Woman
over a year ago
Stirling |
It’s entirely based on how well a person knows you or how much you are willing to let a person get to know you, on here we are all a page of images with a short blurb about ourselves mainly geared toward what we enjoy sexually not who we are overall.
It’s easy to take someone’s words and come up with your own interpretation of what that person is like, some people may come across full of bravado but in reality can be shy or vice versa- it’s easy to be a keyboard warrior sure it can give us an indication of common interests, kinks, likes, dislikes but it’s the face to face meets that solidify whether or not you click or not, never judge a book by its cover xx |
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By *tew008Man
over a year ago
edinburgh |
Yup, someone accused me of having body issues a few days ago. Which I’ve never considered really I equally love and hate myself. Only ever look at things objectively. So yea people miss a lot of my rhetoric. |
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A lot of people think I'm being serious when I'm generally not...sarcasm is my primary language and I don't really take much of this game called life seriously.
People who don't know me often think I'm extremely blunt...I'm just pragmatic and prefer everyone to know where they stand, I can't be doing with pussy-footing around, or dealing with ambiguous statements and two-faced people. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Nope, not really. It's not that I feel misunderstood or anything, but I feel like you really need to know me on a deep personal level to understand why I am the way I am. I'm not sure if that makes sense. "
It does. And then people still do jump to conclusions. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No not unless they get to know me personally. I sometimes say things which I find funny and I keep a straight face or I send messages which entertain me with no emoji.
I guess I will end up getting blocked by some users because they will take what I say seriously. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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None of us are that difficult to understand really. There are only so many ways to be a human. Its whether people can be bothered to understand you or take time to get to know you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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On the whole, no. Colleagues and associates never know/knew the real me, but then I'm quite reserved unless I know you really well. I'm also very selective, so it's mostly my fault.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I'd rather be accepted than understood if given a choice. "
^^ This really. You'd have to spend a few months with me to see the full range of mood-swinging. And people don't get it when I say I'm actually quiet until they've seen it. |
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After my heart attack I will tell people about my lack of fear over death and if I should die, they should know I don’t regret anything. Actually enjoyed my life.
But they generally don’t hear the last bit as they get all wound up over the death bit
It’s nice they’re concerned over my health and want to say the right things, but I wish they’d understand why I’m talking the way I am.
There’s been times recently when I’ve wanted to die and wish the heart attack had killed me, but as it didn’t I just have to get on with things. Especially as I’m going through a lot of stress recently with my ex wife and getting access to my kids.
It’s just some times I think, you know what…it was a good time but I’m ready for the big sleep now.
By the way I’m not suicidal, something else I have to point out |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"None of us are that difficult to understand really. There are only so many ways to be a human. Its whether people can be bothered to understand you or take time to get to know you. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I'd rather be accepted than understood if given a choice.
^^ This really. You'd have to spend a few months with me to see the full range of mood-swinging. And people don't get it when I say I'm actually quiet until they've seen it."
We aren't obliged to fit into our fab persona or someone's image of us. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No, I don’t think anyone really “gets me”. Some think they do because they can relate to one particular part of my personality or share a common interest but everyone seems to drift away eventually because I’m not the person they thought I was. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It’s entirely based on how well a person knows you or how much you are willing to let a person get to know you, on here we are all a page of images with a short blurb about ourselves mainly geared toward what we enjoy sexually not who we are overall.
It’s easy to take someone’s words and come up with your own interpretation of what that person is like, some people may come across full of bravado but in reality can be shy or vice versa- it’s easy to be a keyboard warrior sure it can give us an indication of common interests, kinks, likes, dislikes but it’s the face to face meets that solidify whether or not you click or not, never judge a book by its cover xx"
This lady knows |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think people try to get me but often fail.
I fascinate people amd am a bit of an enigma because im different and quirky but in reality im lovely and a shy individual, I just dress with a zero fucks given attitude. People either love it or hate it and either are fine with me. Love it , welcome to my zany world, hate it , well you're obviously not my people and that's OK too.
I have noticed I certainly have a certain type of person who is drawn to me and that's in all walks of life.
It reminds me of the line in the Craft... 'We are the weridos Mr'
Sexually do people get me?? On the whole no ,but the important person totally does |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've often found in my life that people just don't understand me, get what I'm about or where I'm coming from. People can often take what I say the wrong way, and as we know in life people often judge others based on seeing only a very small snippet of them.
I think Al Pacino once said you have to have been around him for 50 years to understand him. I feel like that and I'm not 30 yet!
So the question is do you think people get you?"
Yeah. I'm not mysterious at all, I'm very open about my positives and my flaws and I hate drama, communication and honesty are my fetishes.
Not everybody likes me but I'm pretty sure they know what I'm all about. |
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