So I don’t really know how to explain this backstory without giving away where I work etc but will keep it as brief as possible
So, naturally we will all have different ‘authority’ at work and are at different levels in the ‘hierarchy’.
I’ve just started a new job at the same company as my OH who’s worked his way up pretty high. I’m new to the sector and have a pretty basic role.
Anyway I asked someone quite high up in the company what he was having for his tea today and my colleagues were (& I quote) mortified’ that I would speak to someone more senior so informally, I’m actually disturbed that I can’t ask a colleague, a normal human being, a basic question.
Question:- are you a ‘job snob’ (like my colleagues and OH) or do you, like me, believe that you should show the janitor the same respect as the CEO?
Discuss….. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So I don’t really know how to explain this backstory without giving away where I work etc but will keep it as brief as possible
So, naturally we will all have different ‘authority’ at work and are at different levels in the ‘hierarchy’.
I’ve just started a new job at the same company as my OH who’s worked his way up pretty high. I’m new to the sector and have a pretty basic role.
Anyway I asked someone quite high up in the company what he was having for his tea today and my colleagues were (& I quote) mortified’ that I would speak to someone more senior so informally, I’m actually disturbed that I can’t ask a colleague, a normal human being, a basic question.
Question:- are you a ‘job snob’ (like my colleagues and OH) or do you, like me, believe that you should show the janitor the same respect as the CEO?
Discuss….. "
Completely agree with you and I’d ask our MD the same question. He is a foodie though  I would be comfortable talking informally with anyone I work with though. Congrats on the new job, good luck! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I wouldn't have done it, but that's because I grew up in a culture where people in authority are treated more with respect than as friends and as a result, it would be small talk at most.
Even when at a small company where it was more intimate and everyone was friendly with each other, I still tried not to cross that line because if I was doing something wrong, I don't want them worrying about putting the friendship in jeopardy and would rather them be objective so I can work on it to be better. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So I don’t really know how to explain this backstory without giving away where I work etc but will keep it as brief as possible
So, naturally we will all have different ‘authority’ at work and are at different levels in the ‘hierarchy’.
I’ve just started a new job at the same company as my OH who’s worked his way up pretty high. I’m new to the sector and have a pretty basic role.
Anyway I asked someone quite high up in the company what he was having for his tea today and my colleagues were (& I quote) mortified’ that I would speak to someone more senior so informally, I’m actually disturbed that I can’t ask a colleague, a normal human being, a basic question.
Question:- are you a ‘job snob’ (like my colleagues and OH) or do you, like me, believe that you should show the janitor the same respect as the CEO?
Discuss….. "
CEO won't clean the bogs, and I agree. The people who do the shittest jobs deserve at least equal respect.
There's this stupid thing where money-making ability is valued above all else, and above the more mundane but socially important contributions made by others. Good bosses lift up their teams and value the contribution of all, they don't knock them down into a mythical hierarchy. |
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"God no!! I work with managing solicitors and big cheeses of the charity and everyone is 100% on the same level. I’d hate to be anywhere that wasn’t so open. "
I agree. I’ve only been there two months and it’s making me itch to leave! |
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I'd be like you, OP, and have a conversation.
I've always prided myself on being able to talk to everyone from the shop floor to CEO
However I also recognise that not everyone's the same. I also may not have risen especially high in anything I've ever done because I don't and won't arse kiss (and I have been told that by an old colleague before) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So I don’t really know how to explain this backstory without giving away where I work etc but will keep it as brief as possible
So, naturally we will all have different ‘authority’ at work and are at different levels in the ‘hierarchy’.
I’ve just started a new job at the same company as my OH who’s worked his way up pretty high. I’m new to the sector and have a pretty basic role.
Anyway I asked someone quite high up in the company what he was having for his tea today and my colleagues were (& I quote) mortified’ that I would speak to someone more senior so informally, I’m actually disturbed that I can’t ask a colleague, a normal human being, a basic question.
Question:- are you a ‘job snob’ (like my colleagues and OH) or do you, like me, believe that you should show the janitor the same respect as the CEO?
Discuss….. "
Yes its OK, don't tske it too far like shoutin "yo [name] wazzzzaaaaap" or slap his back |
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"God no!! I work with managing solicitors and big cheeses of the charity and everyone is 100% on the same level. I’d hate to be anywhere that wasn’t so open.
I agree. I’ve only been there two months and it’s making me itch to leave! "
Ah that’s crap Chuck  I know what you mean. I couldn’t feel inferior as a human just because I had a different job title. In every business I’ve managed I’ve run it on that basis too. Not great for team spirit. |
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I've contracted for years so sat outside the normal hierarchies at companies I've worked with. It's made me completely blasé about formal power structures - I'm as at home chatting to the board as I am the canteen staff and I don't alter according to someone's pay grade.
It was an eye opener working in the public sector a few years ago, trying to arrange a meeting and being refused because I was too low a grade; I had to get my manager to set up meetings for me.
Just ridiculous! |
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By *rad670Man
over a year ago
South Lakes |
I have had so many jobs because of snobs and the untouchable attitude and ended up self employed again and will do until I retire. My experiences with the hierarchy is that the people at the very top who everyone fears and will not speak to unless to kiss ass are actually the nicest people and actually appreciate a normal non ass kissing conversation. The problem is with the climbers/ middle management who will climb over anyone to get to the top. I have met many people with money and some with mega money and the same applies, the really wealthy are nice, the wannabees are the dicks. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My old job had folk of all levels, experience and pay working within the same areas. These folk would all have much the same respect and tea shack banter. But we did have what was knows as "level 5" who were all dickheads of the highest order. They tried to chat with us but we barely gave them the time of day |
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As long as you’re polite and talk with a smile, you should be able to have a conversation with anyone. I think it shows good confidence that you’re able to do that.
I guess the proof is his reaction. Was he happy to talk (which shows you judged it well) or was he stand-offish? |
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"My old job had folk of all levels, experience and pay working within the same areas. These folk would all have much the same respect and tea shack banter. But we did have what was knows as "level 5" who were all dickheads of the highest order. They tried to chat with us but we barely gave them the time of day"
And what was ‘level 5’? |
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"As long as you’re polite and talk with a smile, you should be able to have a conversation with anyone. I think it shows good confidence that you’re able to do that.
I guess the proof is his reaction. Was he happy to talk (which shows you judged it well) or was he stand-offish?"
Honestly he was shocked - but it did seem more shocked that someone made a friendly joke rather than shocked that someone dared make conversation |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My old job had folk of all levels, experience and pay working within the same areas. These folk would all have much the same respect and tea shack banter. But we did have what was knows as "level 5" who were all dickheads of the highest order. They tried to chat with us but we barely gave them the time of day
And what was ‘level 5’?"
Most of the upper management. Section leaders etc. Made our lives hell 90% of the time. Always wanting more ut then were nice as pit to our face |
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I work at a company where the MD is very isolated, everything has to go up the chain, wouldn't even tslk to him about work. Those who don't like the direction are pushed out. Those brought in improve things leave because they aren't allowed to change things. Little communication between functions.
Rant over
Other than that it's grand. |
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Maybe we should take a page out of some japanese companies.
I worked for a security company that did some work for the Toyota plant at Deeside, everyone wore the same uniform from the MD to the cleaner. I got talking to a few blokes, only to find out later they were upper management.
Why shouldn't you ask normal questions to people. |
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Mr KC and I work for the same organisation. I'm a manager, he's fairly junior. We're exceptionally informal with each other 
But with the wider organisation, it's much the same. Now, neither of us would shout "do that again and I'll fucking twat you" to our SMT (as we did to each other today) but The Chief Cheese slums it in the same tea making facilities, loos and other areas and so you naturally have "regular" conversation about what you did at the weekend, dinner choices, the football and other such things. I'd hate to pussy foot around things with senior management.
But Mr KC and I are VERY informal and inappropriate with each other (bonus of largely WFH  ) |
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It really depends on the culture, asking an informal question isn’t doing anything wrong but there’s a time and a place for it.
Some organisations / industries require professional distance to ensure familiarity doesn’t encourage misconducts, lack of adherence to policies, favouritism, getting away with crap cause the boss is your mate etc).I’ve learnt the hard way the higher up I go the more boundaries I need to set with colleagues that are friends, especially if I need to provide feedback etc.
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