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"Probably the most toxic mindset to come out of the last 5-10 years is this idea of “I’m me and I ain’t changing for no one” If you’re a shitty person. Change. " You just carry on as you are, you're doing a grand job | |||
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"Probably the most toxic mindset to come out of the last 5-10 years is this idea of “I’m me and I ain’t changing for no one” If you’re a shitty person. Change. You may now be my favourite person on the Internet " I was just about to type the same thing | |||
"Probably the most toxic mindset to come out of the last 5-10 years is this idea of “I’m me and I ain’t changing for no one” If you’re a shitty person. Change. " I appreciate that, shows maturity x | |||
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"Probably the most toxic mindset to come out of the last 5-10 years is this idea of “I’m me and I ain’t changing for no one” If you’re a shitty person. Change. " | |||
"Probably the most toxic mindset to come out of the last 5-10 years is this idea of “I’m me and I ain’t changing for no one” If you’re a shitty person. Change. " Oooof Wasn't expecting that!!! | |||
"Probably the most toxic mindset to come out of the last 5-10 years is this idea of “I’m me and I ain’t changing for no one” If you’re a shitty person. Change. You just carry on as you are, you're doing a grand job " | |||
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"I’m me is a good thing… but saying you won’t change for anyone isn’t. I’ve missed being the old me, the one that always helps others and always wants to make people happy, safe and protected. But also the old me never stopped and dealt with my own trauma. It caught up with me recently. 27 years of trauma of losing loved ones, death of friends on military ops. And to many suicides of close friends. So the me I am now is learning to deal with talking to others and not being scared to open up to strangers. I’ve never been a bad person but I’ve been treated as one many times in my military and Private military career always from people who don’t know me. But it doesn’t mean I haven’t hurt people I should have been trying to make happy. So because if that I do want to change for the better.but I will be me again. Just a better one that knows my limits on Be proud of who you are now PP, accept your faults and learn from them. " | |||
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"I’m me is a good thing… but saying you won’t change for anyone isn’t. I’ve missed being the old me, the one that always helps others and always wants to make people happy, safe and protected. But also the old me never stopped and dealt with my own trauma. It caught up with me recently. 27 years of trauma of losing loved ones, death of friends on military ops. And to many suicides of close friends. So the me I am now is learning to deal with talking to others and not being scared to open up to strangers. I’ve never been a bad person but I’ve been treated as one many times in my military and Private military career always from people who don’t know me. But it doesn’t mean I haven’t hurt people I should have been trying to make happy. So because if that I do want to change for the better.but I will be me again. Just a better one that knows my limits on Be proud of who you are now PP, accept your faults and learn from them. " Great post | |||
"I am me, I would never change myself to fit in with another persons ideals or requirements I have the maturity to recognise faults within myself and strive to improve them but I’m never going to do that for the benefit of someone else. I’m either accepted as I am, warts and all or not all, I wasn’t made to fit in someone else’s box x" Exactly and you’re an amazing person… | |||
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"Probably the most toxic mindset to come out of the last 5-10 years is this idea of “I’m me and I ain’t changing for no one” If you’re a shitty person. Change. " Totally agree | |||
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"I’m me is a good thing… but saying you won’t change for anyone isn’t. I’ve missed being the old me, the one that always helps others and always wants to make people happy, safe and protected. But also the old me never stopped and dealt with my own trauma. It caught up with me recently. 27 years of trauma of losing loved ones, death of friends on military ops. And to many suicides of close friends. So the me I am now is learning to deal with talking to others and not being scared to open up to strangers. I’ve never been a bad person but I’ve been treated as one many times in my military and Private military career always from people who don’t know me. But it doesn’t mean I haven’t hurt people I should have been trying to make happy. So because if that I do want to change for the better.but I will be me again. Just a better one that knows my limits on Be proud of who you are now PP, accept your faults and learn from them. " | |||
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"I think there's a big difference between making changes in your life because you want to, or changing to fit in with others/what you think others want. It's rarely black and white. I also think self-acceptance, knowing your strengths and weaknesses, is very empowering and I can see that expressed as "I am me". That doesn't make me a good person or a shitty person, because none of us is as straightforward as that. It makes me human. Mrs TMN x" Exactly this :l | |||
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"I think there's a big difference between making changes in your life because you want to, or changing to fit in with others/what you think others want. It's rarely black and white. I also think self-acceptance, knowing your strengths and weaknesses, is very empowering and I can see that expressed as "I am me". That doesn't make me a good person or a shitty person, because none of us is as straightforward as that. It makes me human. Mrs TMN x" I agree. Far better put than the opening post which seems a bit like a self obsessed live laugh love sort of thing. | |||
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"I’m me is a good thing… but saying you won’t change for anyone isn’t. I’ve missed being the old me, the one that always helps others and always wants to make people happy, safe and protected. But also the old me never stopped and dealt with my own trauma. It caught up with me recently. 27 years of trauma of losing loved ones, death of friends on military ops. And to many suicides of close friends. So the me I am now is learning to deal with talking to others and not being scared to open up to strangers. I’ve never been a bad person but I’ve been treated as one many times in my military and Private military career always from people who don’t know me. But it doesn’t mean I haven’t hurt people I should have been trying to make happy. So because if that I do want to change for the better.but I will be me again. Just a better one that knows my limits on Be proud of who you are now PP, accept your faults and learn from them. " | |||
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"You should’ve put that shit in public it make you looks like .... defo nothing to be proud " | |||
"Probably the most toxic mindset to come out of the last 5-10 years is this idea of “I’m me and I ain’t changing for no one” If you’re a shitty person. Change. " I don't always agree with things you post but this is spot on. Mr | |||
"I think there's a big difference between making changes in your life because you want to, or changing to fit in with others/what you think others want. It's rarely black and white. I also think self-acceptance, knowing your strengths and weaknesses, is very empowering and I can see that expressed as "I am me". That doesn't make me a good person or a shitty person, because none of us is as straightforward as that. It makes me human. Mrs TMN x" Yes, and I think this is exactly what the OP was doing. I guess it's the difference between saying "I know I make mistakes and try to be better but this is who I am' and 'I don't care how my behavoir affects others, if they don't like it, tough' I don't agree with not changing to suit others. If her ladyship told me that there was something I did that upset or hurt her, perhaps made her feel insecure I would absolutely consider changing. It may be a part of me I was unwilling to change and we would need to talk but the option of change would always be there on the table. Mr. | |||
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"An honest and open post PP.... well done for having the chutzpah to rock it. For me, I'm just me. I have changed to suit others all my life and it's done nothing but cause me pain, mentally and physically. So these days I don't. I'll be open and honest and speak my mind, and it breaks my heart if that does hurt someone I care for. But for my own sanity I can't be anything but honest with myself and others now. 15 years ago I married a man I didn't love because I didn't have the balls to be honest. I was stuck in that misery for 5 years. And I spent almost 7 of the years since then in an abusive relationship because I didn't have the balls to be honest and ask for support from a friend. So now, this is me. I'm fiercely loyal to those I love but I'll never not speak my mind again. I can and will change if my behaviour is hurtful, and I'm always open to having a discussion about my behaviour, as without that we cannot always see where we have gone wrong and grow from it. But I won't cower away from my own feelings any more. Like me or leave me, that's your choice." Good post. I guess there is a fine line between being true to yourself and your values on the one hand and not caring how you affect those around you on the other. Sometimes these ideas can clash too. I walked away from my marriage because she refused to consider change in fact genuinely believed she wasn't able to - an idea I disagreed with as I didn't think our problems were caused by what she thought. In that situation I had spent years trying to accept the status quo for the sake of love and it completely broke us both in the end. Like you, I have learned that I need to be more open and honest about who I am and what I need but I still would only ever say take me or leave me as a very last resort, not an opening statement. Mr | |||
"An honest and open post PP.... well done for having the chutzpah to rock it. For me, I'm just me. I have changed to suit others all my life and it's done nothing but cause me pain, mentally and physically. So these days I don't. I'll be open and honest and speak my mind, and it breaks my heart if that does hurt someone I care for. But for my own sanity I can't be anything but honest with myself and others now. 15 years ago I married a man I didn't love because I didn't have the balls to be honest. I was stuck in that misery for 5 years. And I spent almost 7 of the years since then in an abusive relationship because I didn't have the balls to be honest and ask for support from a friend. So now, this is me. I'm fiercely loyal to those I love but I'll never not speak my mind again. I can and will change if my behaviour is hurtful, and I'm always open to having a discussion about my behaviour, as without that we cannot always see where we have gone wrong and grow from it. But I won't cower away from my own feelings any more. Like me or leave me, that's your choice. Good post. I guess there is a fine line between being true to yourself and your values on the one hand and not caring how you affect those around you on the other. Sometimes these ideas can clash too. I walked away from my marriage because she refused to consider change in fact genuinely believed she wasn't able to - an idea I disagreed with as I didn't think our problems were caused by what she thought. In that situation I had spent years trying to accept the status quo for the sake of love and it completely broke us both in the end. Like you, I have learned that I need to be more open and honest about who I am and what I need but I still would only ever say take me or leave me as a very last resort, not an opening statement. Mr " As would I. It is a last resort, and usually a defence mechanism to hide the hurt that someone would walk away. | |||
"If you’re a shitty person. Change. " If everyone adopted this mindset, the world would be much nicer place for everybody! Well said that man! | |||
"I think there's a big difference between making changes in your life because you want to, or changing to fit in with others/what you think others want. It's rarely black and white. I also think self-acceptance, knowing your strengths and weaknesses, is very empowering and I can see that expressed as "I am me". That doesn't make me a good person or a shitty person, because none of us is as straightforward as that. It makes me human. Mrs TMN x Yes, and I think this is exactly what the OP was doing. I guess it's the difference between saying "I know I make mistakes and try to be better but this is who I am' and 'I don't care how my behavoir affects others, if they don't like it, tough' I don't agree with not changing to suit others. If her ladyship told me that there was something I did that upset or hurt her, perhaps made her feel insecure I would absolutely consider changing. It may be a part of me I was unwilling to change and we would need to talk but the option of change would always be there on the table. Mr. " There is always a balance to strike in a relationship, I take your point. I was meaning when it's all one way. Advocating for your wants and needs isn't selfish, although it sometimes feels that way. Open and reciprocal communication is key. X | |||
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"I think there's a big difference between making changes in your life because you want to, or changing to fit in with others/what you think others want. It's rarely black and white. I also think self-acceptance, knowing your strengths and weaknesses, is very empowering and I can see that expressed as "I am me". That doesn't make me a good person or a shitty person, because none of us is as straightforward as that. It makes me human. Mrs TMN x Yes, and I think this is exactly what the OP was doing. I guess it's the difference between saying "I know I make mistakes and try to be better but this is who I am' and 'I don't care how my behavoir affects others, if they don't like it, tough' I don't agree with not changing to suit others. If her ladyship told me that there was something I did that upset or hurt her, perhaps made her feel insecure I would absolutely consider changing. It may be a part of me I was unwilling to change and we would need to talk but the option of change would always be there on the table. Mr. There is always a balance to strike in a relationship, I take your point. I was meaning when it's all one way. Advocating for your wants and needs isn't selfish, although it sometimes feels that way. Open and reciprocal communication is key. X" It can feel selfish and can be very hard to do when you are used to putting the needs of others first. Absolutely agree communication is key - real communication that involves listening to each other, not just hearing what we think the other is saying. Mr | |||
"I think there's a big difference between making changes in your life because you want to, or changing to fit in with others/what you think others want. It's rarely black and white. I also think self-acceptance, knowing your strengths and weaknesses, is very empowering and I can see that expressed as "I am me". That doesn't make me a good person or a shitty person, because none of us is as straightforward as that. It makes me human. Mrs TMN x I agree. Far better put than the opening post which seems a bit like a self obsessed live laugh love sort of thing. " I expect it’s one of those you see on Facebook. | |||
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"Probably the most toxic mindset to come out of the last 5-10 years is this idea of “I’m me and I ain’t changing for no one” If you’re a shitty person. Change. " This 100 | |||
"Probably the most toxic mindset to come out of the last 5-10 years is this idea of “I’m me and I ain’t changing for no one” If you’re a shitty person. Change. You just carry on as you are, you're doing a grand job " I don’t think he was talking about himself. | |||
"OP you messed up your spelling too... " But I'm not gonna change it for anybody! | |||
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"Probably the most toxic mindset to come out of the last 5-10 years is this idea of “I’m me and I ain’t changing for no one” If you’re a shitty person. Change. " Bravo. | |||
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"I've screwed up as a Man, as a Father, as a Boyfriend, as a Son, as a Friend, as a lover, simply because... I don't always do or say the "right things". I have a smart mouth, I have secrets, I have scars , because I have a history and I have lived an amazing , varied, exciting, scary and full life. Some people love me, some people like me, some people might hate me, or not want me around. I have done good in my life. I have done bad in my life. I may even be crazy, random and silly. I may be scared, hurt and messed up , I will not pretend to be someone I am not. I am who I am. You can love me or you can hate me. That's your choice and only yours. But if I love you, I do it with my whole heart, and I will make no apologies for the way I am. If I do not like you, I promise that you will know that too. I AM ME... And I will not change it for the world. " You’re a good man pp x I’ve changed so much in many ways, I’ve been the one that’s been hurt, but everyday I’m healing. I’m far from perfect, but this is the me that I am now. X | |||
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"Probably the most toxic mindset to come out of the last 5-10 years is this idea of “I’m me and I ain’t changing for no one” If you’re a shitty person. Change. " I concur. | |||
"I've screwed up as a Man, as a Father, as a Boyfriend, as a Son, as a Friend, as a lover, simply because... I don't always do or say the "right things". I have a smart mouth, I have secrets, I have scars , because I have a history and I have lived an amazing , varied, exciting, scary and full life. Some people love me, some people like me, some people might hate me, or not want me around. I have done good in my life. I have done bad in my life. I may even be crazy, random and silly. I may be scared, hurt and messed up , I will not pretend to be someone I am not. I am who I am. You can love me or you can hate me. That's your choice and only yours. But if I love you, I do it with my whole heart, and I will make no apologies for the way I am. If I do not like you, I promise that you will know that too. I AM ME... And I will not change it for the world. " You can't be anyone else and you cant grow and learn without experiences and reflection. Wear the scars of life as the markers of growth... me 2021 | |||
"Glad I found out how cynical some people are on here. I found it on FB and some of it ring true but not all I'm proud of who I am, yeah I've fucked up and so has everyone one else. My fault is I give people the benefit of doubt. You need to get your own house in order before judging other's." I agree! ANd even then... why would you need to judge other people harshly? What benefit does it offer? | |||
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"Glad I found out how cynical some people are on here. I found it on FB and some of it ring true but not all I'm proud of who I am, yeah I've fucked up and so has everyone one else. My fault is I give people the benefit of doubt. You need to get your own house in order before judging other's. I agree! ANd even then... why would you need to judge other people harshly? What benefit does it offer? " It’s in others people’s benefit to judge others harshly to make themselves feel taller sad but true. | |||
"I saw it more as a kind of poem, stating that the person had reached a point in their life when they could see the mistakes they had made but also they know that they are not all bad. I think they are saying they won't apologise for the whole person that they are but they have recognised where they went wrong. They are asking to be accepted as a human being with all their faults. I do not necessarily see that as a shitty person, I am sure there are other people with similar narratives who would not have the balls to acknowledge their faults? " I agree, accept I saw it as accepting themselves | |||
"Glad I found out how cynical some people are on here. I found it on FB and some of it ring true but not all I'm proud of who I am, yeah I've fucked up and so has everyone one else. My fault is I give people the benefit of doubt. You need to get your own house in order before judging other's. I agree! ANd even then... why would you need to judge other people harshly? What benefit does it offer? It’s in others people’s benefit to judge others harshly to make themselves feel taller sad but true. " I was thinking exactly the same. | |||
"Glad I found out how cynical some people are on here. I found it on FB and some of it ring true but not all I'm proud of who I am, yeah I've fucked up and so has everyone one else. My fault is I give people the benefit of doubt. You need to get your own house in order before judging other's. I agree! ANd even then... why would you need to judge other people harshly? What benefit does it offer? It’s in others people’s benefit to judge others harshly to make themselves feel taller sad but true. " Only those who wont wear heels | |||
"Glad I found out how cynical some people are on here. I found it on FB and some of it ring true but not all I'm proud of who I am, yeah I've fucked up and so has everyone one else. My fault is I give people the benefit of doubt. You need to get your own house in order before judging other's. I agree! ANd even then... why would you need to judge other people harshly? What benefit does it offer? It’s in others people’s benefit to judge others harshly to make themselves feel taller sad but true. Only those who wont wear heels" Haha nice answer | |||
"Glad I found out how cynical some people are on here. I found it on FB and some of it ring true but not all I'm proud of who I am, yeah I've fucked up and so has everyone one else. My fault is I give people the benefit of doubt. You need to get your own house in order before judging other's. I agree! ANd even then... why would you need to judge other people harshly? What benefit does it offer? It’s in others people’s benefit to judge others harshly to make themselves feel taller sad but true. Only those who wont wear heels Haha nice answer " | |||