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Rude, Entitled People
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I don't understand why do some people in general act so rude and entitled whether it's in a shop, a public place or even in your own home.
Whatever happened to using manners and talking like an actual adult?
It saddens me that rude, entitled people would rather stomp, scream and shout like a child to get their own way. What's worse is some of these people would resort to violence or even stealing to get what they want.
Has anyone here ever encountered people like that? |
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"I don't understand why do some people in general act so rude and entitled whether it's in a shop, a public place or even in your own home.
Whatever happened to using manners and talking like an actual adult?
It saddens me that rude, entitled people would rather stomp, scream and shout like a child to get their own way. What's worse is some of these people would resort to violence or even stealing to get what they want.
Has anyone here ever encountered people like that?"
Welcome to the forums, I’m sure there will be a few along to behave exactly as you describe shortly. |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
We cannot ever control other people's behaviour - the only thing we can control is how we respond.
We have options of ignoring or being rude in return, we could respond in a way that takes the wind out of their sale and perhaps we can try to understand why they are behaving in that way. Sometimes we can achieve remarkable results and people come to their senses.
Whatever we choose, however we behave in response is our choice. Personally (And I am definitely not a sain  - I just feel sooo much better when I have responded in a calm way and managed to de-escalate. |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"We cannot ever control other people's behaviour - the only thing we can control is how we respond.
We have options of ignoring or being rude in return, we could respond in a way that takes the wind out of their sale and perhaps we can try to understand why they are behaving in that way. Sometimes we can achieve remarkable results and people come to their senses.
Whatever we choose, however we behave in response is our choice. Personally (And I am definitely not a sain - I just feel sooo much better when I have responded in a calm way and managed to de-escalate. "
*** definitely not a saint  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We cannot ever control other people's behaviour - the only thing we can control is how we respond.
We have options of ignoring or being rude in return, we could respond in a way that takes the wind out of their sale and perhaps we can try to understand why they are behaving in that way. Sometimes we can achieve remarkable results and people come to their senses.
Whatever we choose, however we behave in response is our choice. Personally (And I am definitely not a sain - I just feel sooo much better when I have responded in a calm way and managed to de-escalate. "
This is right.
We cannot do anything to control others all you can do is make sure you uphold the standard |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't understand why do some people in general act so rude and entitled whether it's in a shop, a public place or even in your own home.
Whatever happened to using manners and talking like an actual adult?
It saddens me that rude, entitled people would rather stomp, scream and shout like a child to get their own way. What's worse is some of these people would resort to violence or even stealing to get what they want.
Has anyone here ever encountered people like that?"
Are you an Empath, OP? It may well be that you attract narcissists like a moth to a flame.
It’s not nice meeting entitled people but, I do find it fascinating why they act that way! It can be linked to childhood trauma and not having their basic needs met as an infant. Or, it may be they were spoiled rotten in their early years, and when they come to realise this isn’t how society is, they act out, much like a toddler having a tantrum and become manipulative! Worth googling schemas! Really interesting - but I hope you don’t come across too many people like that! X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It’s not very nice, but often behaviour like this comes from a place of pain or misunderstanding.
Sometimes we need to listen and understand, rather than judge and shame I think. |
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"I don't understand why do some people in general act so rude and entitled whether it's in a shop, a public place or even in your own home.
Whatever happened to using manners and talking like an actual adult?
It saddens me that rude, entitled people would rather stomp, scream and shout like a child to get their own way. What's worse is some of these people would resort to violence or even stealing to get what they want.
Has anyone here ever encountered people like that?
Are you an Empath, OP? It may well be that you attract narcissists like a moth to a flame.
It’s not nice meeting entitled people but, I do find it fascinating why they act that way! It can be linked to childhood trauma and not having their basic needs met as an infant. Or, it may be they were spoiled rotten in their early years, and when they come to realise this isn’t how society is, they act out, much like a toddler having a tantrum and become manipulative! Worth googling schemas! Really interesting - but I hope you don’t come across too many people like that! X"
Luckily, I have not encountered many entitled people apart from the odd one or two but that's about it. I've seen many Youtube videos on entitled people which is appalling on how they behave.
I completely agree that their sense of entitlement possibly stems from their own childhoods and how they were raised. |
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"They are around every corner of life OP, best to ignore and stick to your values.
Reacting to them just feeds their entitled egos more by giving them the attention they crave "
I completely agree.  |
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"I don't understand why do some people in general act so rude and entitled whether it's in a shop, a public place or even in your own home.
Whatever happened to using manners and talking like an actual adult?
It saddens me that rude, entitled people would rather stomp, scream and shout like a child to get their own way. What's worse is some of these people would resort to violence or even stealing to get what they want.
Has anyone here ever encountered people like that?"
It's simple. They think they are right in what they do.
Vic |
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"I don't understand why do some people in general act so rude and entitled whether it's in a shop, a public place or even in your own home.
Whatever happened to using manners and talking like an actual adult?
It saddens me that rude, entitled people would rather stomp, scream and shout like a child to get their own way. What's worse is some of these people would resort to violence or even stealing to get what they want.
Has anyone here ever encountered people like that?"
Yes. They are who they are. Whether you meet them in work, in a shop, in your group of friends, in your family.
You will work out ways of dealing or not dealing with people who exhibit such traits.
It really doesn't do to judge them too harshly.
Just go and be yourself somewhere else.
More often than not they are suffering too. |
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Yeah I've encountered a few in my time, I'd like to be a grown up about it and ignore it but I find it too funny. When it happens I usually point out the ridiculousness of the situation and point out how silly and pathetic they are acting, once you point out the obvious they tend to calm themselves down a bit. Failing that I act the same as them mirroring their baby like behaviour till they give up. |
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Plus......
Those are not the only characteristics they have....
At least two that I know and wouldn't part with are decent , generous people.
No one is perfect. Their goodness must outweigh their least attractive traits or i'd not stick around.
Sometimes the chatterers could do with mirrors. |
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"I don't understand why do some people in general act so rude and entitled whether it's in a shop, a public place or even in your own home.
Whatever happened to using manners and talking like an actual adult?
It saddens me that rude, entitled people would rather stomp, scream and shout like a child to get their own way. What's worse is some of these people would resort to violence or even stealing to get what they want.
Has anyone here ever encountered people like that?
Are you an Empath, OP? It may well be that you attract narcissists like a moth to a flame.
It’s not nice meeting entitled people but, I do find it fascinating why they act that way! It can be linked to childhood trauma and not having their basic needs met as an infant. Or, it may be they were spoiled rotten in their early years, and when they come to realise this isn’t how society is, they act out, much like a toddler having a tantrum and become manipulative! Worth googling schemas! Really interesting - but I hope you don’t come across too many people like that! X
Luckily, I have not encountered many entitled people apart from the odd one or two but that's about it. I've seen many Youtube videos on entitled people which is appalling on how they behave.
I completely agree that their sense of entitlement possibly stems from their own childhoods and how they were raised."
Not entirely |
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"I don't understand why do some people in general act so rude and entitled whether it's in a shop, a public place or even in your own home.
Whatever happened to using manners and talking like an actual adult?
It saddens me that rude, entitled people would rather stomp, scream and shout like a child to get their own way. What's worse is some of these people would resort to violence or even stealing to get what they want.
Has anyone here ever encountered people like that?
Are you an Empath, OP? It may well be that you attract narcissists like a moth to a flame.
It’s not nice meeting entitled people but, I do find it fascinating why they act that way! It can be linked to childhood trauma and not having their basic needs met as an infant. Or, it may be they were spoiled rotten in their early years, and when they come to realise this isn’t how society is, they act out, much like a toddler having a tantrum and become manipulative! Worth googling schemas! Really interesting - but I hope you don’t come across too many people like that! X
Luckily, I have not encountered many entitled people apart from the odd one or two but that's about it. I've seen many Youtube videos on entitled people which is appalling on how they behave.
I completely agree that their sense of entitlement possibly stems from their own childhoods and how they were raised.
Not entirely"
True as some people that act rude and entitled are probably not like that all the time and could just be having a bad day. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Plus......
Those are not the only characteristics they have....
At least two that I know and wouldn't part with are decent , generous people.
No one is perfect. Their goodness must outweigh their least attractive traits or i'd not stick around.
Sometimes the chatterers could do with mirrors. "
Wise words Granny |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Plus......
Those are not the only characteristics they have....
At least two that I know and wouldn't part with are decent , generous people.
No one is perfect. Their goodness must outweigh their least attractive traits or i'd not stick around.
Sometimes the chatterers could do with mirrors.
Wise words Granny "
She's good at those isn't she?
Mr |
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"I don't understand why do some people in general act so rude and entitled whether it's in a shop, a public place or even in your own home.
Whatever happened to using manners and talking like an actual adult?
It saddens me that rude, entitled people would rather stomp, scream and shout like a child to get their own way. What's worse is some of these people would resort to violence or even stealing to get what they want.
Has anyone here ever encountered people like that?
Are you an Empath, OP? It may well be that you attract narcissists like a moth to a flame.
It’s not nice meeting entitled people but, I do find it fascinating why they act that way! It can be linked to childhood trauma and not having their basic needs met as an infant. Or, it may be they were spoiled rotten in their early years, and when they come to realise this isn’t how society is, they act out, much like a toddler having a tantrum and become manipulative! Worth googling schemas! Really interesting - but I hope you don’t come across too many people like that! X
Luckily, I have not encountered many entitled people apart from the odd one or two but that's about it. I've seen many Youtube videos on entitled people which is appalling on how they behave.
I completely agree that their sense of entitlement possibly stems from their own childhoods and how they were raised.
Not entirely
True as some people that act rude and entitled are probably not like that all the time and could just be having a bad day."
I meant it's not entirely down to their parents. Despite a lot of faux psychology on the internet it's more than likely your peer group that influence your behaviours once you've been an adult for some years.
Your parents give you your genes and your personality NOT your awful fucking behaviour.
Now I know that kids learn from watching their parents but they leave their parents and spend more years with others. Freinds in school, teachers, college, university , work .......
No .... if YOU ( not you literally ) are a cunt take responsibility for it ..... CHANGE or don't change but DONT blame your bloody mother.
You're an adult.
|
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"I don't understand why do some people in general act so rude and entitled whether it's in a shop, a public place or even in your own home.
Whatever happened to using manners and talking like an actual adult?
It saddens me that rude, entitled people would rather stomp, scream and shout like a child to get their own way. What's worse is some of these people would resort to violence or even stealing to get what they want.
Has anyone here ever encountered people like that?
Are you an Empath, OP? It may well be that you attract narcissists like a moth to a flame.
It’s not nice meeting entitled people but, I do find it fascinating why they act that way! It can be linked to childhood trauma and not having their basic needs met as an infant. Or, it may be they were spoiled rotten in their early years, and when they come to realise this isn’t how society is, they act out, much like a toddler having a tantrum and become manipulative! Worth googling schemas! Really interesting - but I hope you don’t come across too many people like that! X
Luckily, I have not encountered many entitled people apart from the odd one or two but that's about it. I've seen many Youtube videos on entitled people which is appalling on how they behave.
I completely agree that their sense of entitlement possibly stems from their own childhoods and how they were raised.
Not entirely
True as some people that act rude and entitled are probably not like that all the time and could just be having a bad day.
I meant it's not entirely down to their parents. Despite a lot of faux psychology on the internet it's more than likely your peer group that influence your behaviours once you've been an adult for some years.
Your parents give you your genes and your personality NOT your awful fucking behaviour.
Now I know that kids learn from watching their parents but they leave their parents and spend more years with others. Freinds in school, teachers, college, university , work .......
No .... if YOU ( not you literally ) are a cunt take responsibility for it ..... CHANGE or don't change but DONT blame your bloody mother.
You're an adult.
"
But some don't see or believe they are being a cunt or acting cuntish therfore won't take or accept responsibility. |
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"I don't understand why do some people in general act so rude and entitled whether it's in a shop, a public place or even in your own home.
Whatever happened to using manners and talking like an actual adult?
It saddens me that rude, entitled people would rather stomp, scream and shout like a child to get their own way. What's worse is some of these people would resort to violence or even stealing to get what they want.
Has anyone here ever encountered people like that?
Are you an Empath, OP? It may well be that you attract narcissists like a moth to a flame.
It’s not nice meeting entitled people but, I do find it fascinating why they act that way! It can be linked to childhood trauma and not having their basic needs met as an infant. Or, it may be they were spoiled rotten in their early years, and when they come to realise this isn’t how society is, they act out, much like a toddler having a tantrum and become manipulative! Worth googling schemas! Really interesting - but I hope you don’t come across too many people like that! X
Luckily, I have not encountered many entitled people apart from the odd one or two but that's about it. I've seen many Youtube videos on entitled people which is appalling on how they behave.
I completely agree that their sense of entitlement possibly stems from their own childhoods and how they were raised.
Not entirely
True as some people that act rude and entitled are probably not like that all the time and could just be having a bad day.
I meant it's not entirely down to their parents. Despite a lot of faux psychology on the internet it's more than likely your peer group that influence your behaviours once you've been an adult for some years.
Your parents give you your genes and your personality NOT your awful fucking behaviour.
Now I know that kids learn from watching their parents but they leave their parents and spend more years with others. Freinds in school, teachers, college, university , work .......
No .... if YOU ( not you literally ) are a cunt take responsibility for it ..... CHANGE or don't change but DONT blame your bloody mother.
You're an adult.
But some don't see or believe they are being a cunt or acting cuntish therfore won't take or accept responsibility."
I know but they should leave their mum alone  |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"Plus......
Those are not the only characteristics they have....
At least two that I know and wouldn't part with are decent , generous people.
No one is perfect. Their goodness must outweigh their least attractive traits or i'd not stick around.
Sometimes the chatterers could do with mirrors. "
Wise words Granny |
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"I don't understand why do some people in general act so rude and entitled whether it's in a shop, a public place or even in your own home.
Whatever happened to using manners and talking like an actual adult?
It saddens me that rude, entitled people would rather stomp, scream and shout like a child to get their own way. What's worse is some of these people would resort to violence or even stealing to get what they want.
Has anyone here ever encountered people like that?
Are you an Empath, OP? It may well be that you attract narcissists like a moth to a flame.
It’s not nice meeting entitled people but, I do find it fascinating why they act that way! It can be linked to childhood trauma and not having their basic needs met as an infant. Or, it may be they were spoiled rotten in their early years, and when they come to realise this isn’t how society is, they act out, much like a toddler having a tantrum and become manipulative! Worth googling schemas! Really interesting - but I hope you don’t come across too many people like that! X
Luckily, I have not encountered many entitled people apart from the odd one or two but that's about it. I've seen many Youtube videos on entitled people which is appalling on how they behave.
I completely agree that their sense of entitlement possibly stems from their own childhoods and how they were raised.
Not entirely
True as some people that act rude and entitled are probably not like that all the time and could just be having a bad day.
I meant it's not entirely down to their parents. Despite a lot of faux psychology on the internet it's more than likely your peer group that influence your behaviours once you've been an adult for some years.
Your parents give you your genes and your personality NOT your awful fucking behaviour.
Now I know that kids learn from watching their parents but they leave their parents and spend more years with others. Freinds in school, teachers, college, university , work .......
No .... if YOU ( not you literally ) are a cunt take responsibility for it ..... CHANGE or don't change but DONT blame your bloody mother.
You're an adult.
But some don't see or believe they are being a cunt or acting cuntish therfore won't take or accept responsibility.
I know but they should leave their mum alone "
True. I don't believe the crap that it stems from the parents.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don’t think this is a very pleasant thread. Lots of undercurrents going on in here. "
I was about to say the same. Can’t we just talk about the original post?! Not blaming anyone lol just genuinely interested having studied personality disorders. Bye guys! |
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I was only thinking about this the other day.
I think it's not rude entitled people,
It's rude entitled society!!
Fact
Everywhere you go people are just plain ignorant.
I'll give you some examples that I'm sure we all come across daily.
The car driver who comes speeding round a corner and despite it being your right of way they charge towards you forcing you to stop or veer and almost guaranteed they will give you a dirty look.
The car drivers who done bother stopping at junctions anymore just pull out from a side road not assuming nothing is coming but with the attitude everyone must stop for them.
The ignorant asshole who pushes past you when shopping and grabs the thing you can are reaching for.
The herd of kids who walk down the centre of the road as if it's their own personal walkway and then proceed to abuse car driver's who dare to be driving on the road at same time.
The lady in the local shop who's abusing the poor woman behind the till and threatening to complain about her just because they had run out of bread.
The people who think it's "perfectly fine" to talk their minds regardless of the consequences and the feeling of others.
Football hooligans who think it's acceptable to act like fucking animals.
People who litter and act like it's good as it gives someone a job.
People who don't have the decency to say thank you if you hold the door open for them.
Obnoxious influencers and fake celebrities.
People attacking and abusing NHS staff and emergency services.
My wife is a nurse and the abuse she and colleagues get daily is an absolute joke.
People protesting against well anything that say's they have to do like the rest of us law abiding citizens rather than anything that they want to do.
I could go on and on..
But there has definitely been a degradation in compassion, manners and good old fashion respect.
There's many factors that have caused this but I think one of the biggest contributions has been the massive cutbacks to the police and the lack of police presence on the street people know that they can get away with Just about anything without any comeback. |
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"As children we aren’t responsible for the emotional issues our parents cause, as adults we absolutely are. "
Philip Larkin had it right.
They fuck you up your mum and dad.
They don’t mean to, but they do. |
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"As children we aren’t responsible for the emotional issues our parents cause, as adults we absolutely are.
Philip Larkin had it right.
They fuck you up your mum and dad.
They don’t mean to, but they do. "
I always like that poem.
He's a writer though, not a psychologist , scientist or anthropologist or family expert.
I often wonder if he wrote ....
Ye should pay double the tax
Ye people should
To keep the tories nice and fat
And if thee don't plump them up
Then thee is just a twat .....
Would he be quoted so often and with such assurance. |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Manners and respect cost nothing as long as its mutual. "
While this would be lovely - it does not reflect reality.
I think we should act in a respectful manner irrespective of how we are being treated tbh. I cannot make my behaviour dependent on that of other people because that means I relinquish responsibility for my behaviour.
Besides, sometime people do not realise they are being rude.
Furthermore, we cannot make a rude person change their behaviour. Perhaps by modelling UNCONDITIIONAL positive behaviour they have a chance to see that there is actually another way.
Does not always work - I know.
Does not stop me from trying (most days ) |
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"Manners and respect cost nothing as long as its mutual.
While this would be lovely - it does not reflect reality.
I think we should act in a respectful manner irrespective of how we are being treated tbh. I cannot make my behaviour dependent on that of other people because that means I relinquish responsibility for my behaviour.
Besides, sometime people do not realise they are being rude.
Furthermore, we cannot make a rude person change their behaviour. Perhaps by modelling UNCONDITIIONAL positive behaviour they have a chance to see that there is actually another way.
Does not always work - I know.
Does not stop me from trying (most days )"
If we judge others by our own standards we will always be dissappointed.
I am always respectful and mannerly to everyone I come across. And luckily for me most people reciprocate. However if there is obvious rudeness towards me or someone I'm with then all bets are off.
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"Manners and respect cost nothing as long as its mutual.
While this would be lovely - it does not reflect reality.
I think we should act in a respectful manner irrespective of how we are being treated tbh. I cannot make my behaviour dependent on that of other people because that means I relinquish responsibility for my behaviour.
Besides, sometime people do not realise they are being rude.
Furthermore, we cannot make a rude person change their behaviour. Perhaps by modelling UNCONDITIIONAL positive behaviour they have a chance to see that there is actually another way.
Does not always work - I know.
Does not stop me from trying (most days )
If we judge others by our own standards we will always be dissappointed.
I am always respectful and mannerly to everyone I come across. And luckily for me most people reciprocate. However if there is obvious rudeness towards me or someone I'm with then all bets are off.
"
In an ideal world.
But there's just so many people who just don't give a fuck about anyone or anything.
It's not that they don't realise that it upsets others,they just don't give a fuck.
Look at all the pictures of rubbish left behind at beaches and beauty spot's.
I think they are perfectly aware of their actions but just don't care.its not just one or two it's hundreds of thousands of people! |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
Scottishgent and Jools/Brains - as a human being I feel the same anger and frustration as you when confronted with rude people, I really do. And I am not always able to be forgiving and tolerant, I have my days!!!
But I am saying that if we treat them "eye for an eye" we are making our behaviour a condition of theirs. Surely that means we no longer take responsibility for our behaviour?
It is a bit like when kids say to their mum/ teacher.... He/she "made me do that!
Surely as adults we could take a step back and act differently (at least try?) |
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"Scottishgent and Jools/Brains - as a human being I feel the same anger and frustration as you when confronted with rude people, I really do. And I am not always able to be forgiving and tolerant, I have my days!!!
But I am saying that if we treat them "eye for an eye" we are making our behaviour a condition of theirs. Surely that means we no longer take responsibility for our behaviour?
It is a bit like when kids say to their mum/ teacher.... He/she "made me do that!
Surely as adults we could take a step back and act differently (at least try?) "
Thats why I chose to ignore and not feed into their pathetic behavior |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Scottishgent and Jools/Brains - as a human being I feel the same anger and frustration as you when confronted with rude people, I really do. And I am not always able to be forgiving and tolerant, I have my days!!!
But I am saying that if we treat them "eye for an eye" we are making our behaviour a condition of theirs. Surely that means we no longer take responsibility for our behaviour?
It is a bit like when kids say to their mum/ teacher.... He/she "made me do that!
Surely as adults we could take a step back and act differently (at least try?)
Thats why I chose to ignore and not feed into their pathetic behavior "
I agree and it is absolutely what I do when I cannot muster patience/ kindness etc on that day! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Scottishgent and Jools/Brains - as a human being I feel the same anger and frustration as you when confronted with rude people, I really do. And I am not always able to be forgiving and tolerant, I have my days!!!
But I am saying that if we treat them "eye for an eye" we are making our behaviour a condition of theirs. Surely that means we no longer take responsibility for our behaviour?
It is a bit like when kids say to their mum/ teacher.... He/she "made me do that!
Surely as adults we could take a step back and act differently (at least try?) "
The more of your posts I read, the more I like you - even if you do believe in the stars  
The problem with "if you disrespect me I'll disrespect you" is that it only takes one party to misread or misunderstand the other and then it escalates.
Mr |
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"Scottishgent and Jools/Brains - as a human being I feel the same anger and frustration as you when confronted with rude people, I really do. And I am not always able to be forgiving and tolerant, I have my days!!!
But I am saying that if we treat them "eye for an eye" we are making our behaviour a condition of theirs. Surely that means we no longer take responsibility for our behaviour?
It is a bit like when kids say to their mum/ teacher.... He/she "made me do that!
Surely as adults we could take a step back and act differently (at least try?) "
You get me wrong.
I avoid confrontation at all costs my points are observations from the area I live in, perhaps there's more rude people here I don't know.
I won't seek people out.
There's no need it's everywhere.
You cannot deny that this behaviour isn't everywhere as it is, you only have to look at news reports of said littering.
I can't go and stand in the middle of a beach and call them all out .
However
In my life I always try to be polite and respectful to everyone I meet,I respect the environment and people around me.
Maybe it's because I don't go around with my eyes shut (that's not a dig at anyone btw)my wife literally misses everything as that's her way.
Maybe I do come across as angry and bitter but perhaps that's justified perhaps it's not.
I am by my own admittance a glass is half empty kind of person so I do tend to look at the negative side of things. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think some of it could come from 'autistic brain' almost. People struggle with social norms and how they process information and come across really badly to people when really they are probably just a bit comfused by it all, and then even more so by peoples reactions to them can can make them cross or protective of themselves and it just becomes a worsening cycle. |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Scottishgent and Jools/Brains - as a human being I feel the same anger and frustration as you when confronted with rude people, I really do. And I am not always able to be forgiving and tolerant, I have my days!!!
But I am saying that if we treat them "eye for an eye" we are making our behaviour a condition of theirs. Surely that means we no longer take responsibility for our behaviour?
It is a bit like when kids say to their mum/ teacher.... He/she "made me do that!
Surely as adults we could take a step back and act differently (at least try?)
The more of your posts I read, the more I like you - even if you do believe in the stars
The problem with "if you disrespect me I'll disrespect you" is that it only takes one party to misread or misunderstand the other and then it escalates.
Mr"
Hahaha we need to pick up the stars (Haribos anyone??) some other time.
Of course, it depends on the circumstances, of course, it is not a one size fits all thing and communication is a wonderful thing when it works |
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"Manners and respect cost nothing as long as its mutual.
While this would be lovely - it does not reflect reality.
I think we should act in a respectful manner irrespective of how we are being treated tbh. I cannot make my behaviour dependent on that of other people because that means I relinquish responsibility for my behaviour.
Besides, sometime people do not realise they are being rude.
Furthermore, we cannot make a rude person change their behaviour. Perhaps by modelling UNCONDITIIONAL positive behaviour they have a chance to see that there is actually another way.
Does not always work - I know.
Does not stop me from trying (most days )
If we judge others by our own standards we will always be dissappointed.
I am always respectful and mannerly to everyone I come across. And luckily for me most people reciprocate. However if there is obvious rudeness towards me or someone I'm with then all bets are off.
In an ideal world.
But there's just so many people who just don't give a fuck about anyone or anything.
It's not that they don't realise that it upsets others,they just don't give a fuck.
Look at all the pictures of rubbish left behind at beaches and beauty spot's.
I think they are perfectly aware of their actions but just don't care.its not just one or two it's hundreds of thousands of people!"
I'm making myself sound like a right piece of work lol.
I fully understand that people can have bad days, personal problems, or things that can be misunderstood. I don't bite easily, It would need to be something overtly rude to cause me to react. I look at it as standing up for myself and thoughts I'm with. |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Scottishgent and Jools/Brains - as a human being I feel the same anger and frustration as you when confronted with rude people, I really do. And I am not always able to be forgiving and tolerant, I have my days!!!
But I am saying that if we treat them "eye for an eye" we are making our behaviour a condition of theirs. Surely that means we no longer take responsibility for our behaviour?
It is a bit like when kids say to their mum/ teacher.... He/she "made me do that!
Surely as adults we could take a step back and act differently (at least try?)
You get me wrong.
I avoid confrontation at all costs my points are observations from the area I live in, perhaps there's more rude people here I don't know.
I won't seek people out.
There's no need it's everywhere.
You cannot deny that this behaviour isn't everywhere as it is, you only have to look at news reports of said littering.
I can't go and stand in the middle of a beach and call them all out .
However
In my life I always try to be polite and respectful to everyone I meet,I respect the environment and people around me.
Maybe it's because I don't go around with my eyes shut (that's not a dig at anyone btw)my wife literally misses everything as that's her way.
Maybe I do come across as angry and bitter but perhaps that's justified perhaps it's not.
I am by my own admittance a glass is half empty kind of person so I do tend to look at the negative side of things."
Thanks for that - You know I think we are actually quite aligned.
The example of the littered beach: It brings my blood to boiling point when I see that grown up people find it ok to leave their litter behind for others to pick it up. It really does. And there is no real excuse why people do.
I think accepting it is probably not the right way. Standing in the middle and shouting at them isn't either for we are not the beach police. We cannot make them pick it up or not litter in the first place.
So what options do we have?
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"
I'm making myself sound like a right piece of work lol.
I fully understand that people can have bad days, personal problems, or things that can be misunderstood. I don't bite easily, It would need to be something overtly rude to cause me to react. I look at it as standing up for myself and thoughts I'm with. "
This made me chuckle - actually I did not think of you as a right piece of work lol - but thanks for clarifying. |
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"
I'm making myself sound like a right piece of work lol.
I fully understand that people can have bad days, personal problems, or things that can be misunderstood. I don't bite easily, It would need to be something overtly rude to cause me to react. I look at it as standing up for myself and thoughts I'm with. This made me chuckle - actually I did not think of you as a right piece of work lol - but thanks for clarifying. "
Xx |
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"I think some of it could come from 'autistic brain' almost. People struggle with social norms and how they process information and come across really badly to people when really they are probably just a bit comfused by it all, and then even more so by peoples reactions to them can can make them cross or protective of themselves and it just becomes a worsening cycle. "
Yes I think so to x |
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"I don't understand why do some people in general act so rude and entitled whether it's in a shop, a public place or even in your own home.
Whatever happened to using manners and talking like an actual adult?
It saddens me that rude, entitled people would rather stomp, scream and shout like a child to get their own way. What's worse is some of these people would resort to violence or even stealing to get what they want.
Has anyone here ever encountered people like that?"
We see it a lot on here. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't understand why do some people in general act so rude and entitled whether it's in a shop, a public place or even in your own home.
Whatever happened to using manners and talking like an actual adult?
It saddens me that rude, entitled people would rather stomp, scream and shout like a child to get their own way. What's worse is some of these people would resort to violence or even stealing to get what they want.
Has anyone here ever encountered people like that?"
Theyre probably having a bad day, week, month....
Having patients, waiting for those to get 'over it' is key for the rest who unfortunately, have to endure it on a regular basis.
Interesting to watch though, from the side lines.....  |
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"I think some of it could come from 'autistic brain' almost. People struggle with social norms and how they process information and come across really badly to people when really they are probably just a bit comfused by it all, and then even more so by peoples reactions to them can can make them cross or protective of themselves and it just becomes a worsening cycle. "
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One persons rude is another persons..................
What is rude ?
Just because YOU think a certain type of behaviour was rude - doesn't mean it was.
I know someone who thinks most things are rude if they are not going their own way.
I never EVER see myself as being rude but i'm sure there are people who have judged me that way , poor misguided souls ... ( I think it's them ) |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"One persons rude is another persons..................
What is rude ?
Just because YOU think a certain type of behaviour was rude - doesn't mean it was.
I know someone who thinks most things are rude if they are not going their own way.
I never EVER see myself as being rude but i'm sure there are people who have judged me that way , poor misguided souls ... ( I think it's them ) "
An Italian friend of mine was shopping at a market - she drew a crowd with what was considered her rude behaviour. SHe had no idea why people thought she was rude.
She was being vivacious, full of life, impatient... and by her own description a "normal Italian shopping at a market"
She is a lovely, warm, kind-hearted woman who would never deliberately be rude. |
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