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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm always more likely to reply if it feels like the person has actually looked at my profile, and is complimenting or commenting on specific things about me. Rather than something generic, that feels like they're just messaging a ton of girls in a row. Other than that, just know that most girls here get shit tons of messages daily, so it is easy to get lost in the shuffle x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just be yourself. If you find someone you like, say something that appeals based on their profile or status. You won't appeal to everyone. That's just life I'm afraid |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Make the message personal and interesting and always send a face pic. Try and make it clear you have read the profile and if there is no interest then just move on. I hate it when you get people messaging over and over without a reply. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Something with personality and humour makes me more likely to reply. But ultimately if the attraction isn't there, it doesn't matter how great your first message is, they aren't going to reply.
Just be yourself OP  |
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I don’t want to sound like a Negative Nelly but it really doesn’t matter what you put, replies are luck of her draw.
I had a meet Friday and during the small talk she showed me her fabs profile inbox....530 unread messages.
Guys we really are small fish in the fab ocean  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Wondered how long it would be until another one of these threads popped up.
There are a number of threads on this subject already OP.
The truth is, there is no magic forst message.
And try not to think of them as texts.
A lot of people fall into the trap of thinking that electronic messages are instant and that as soon as they've clicked 'send' that it's been received and read.
It's not a live chat.
Think of your message more as you would a written letter.
But before any of that.....
Make sure your profile is the best it can possibly be, because, before anyone even thinks of reading your message, they will take a look at your profile - and most of the time you won't even know they've done so as most women and couples use  mode.
If they find your profile unappealing, they won't bother with your message.
Next. Don't treat it as some kind of challenge or competition.
Fab is just like the real world. You are going to get knock backs.
READ THEIR PROFILE - This is fundamental.
Don't just look at their pictures and then message them with 'Hi'
You need to be sure that you fit with what they're looking for - but even that's no guarantee of a reply.
You could tick every one of their boxes, but if they just don't fancy you, then it won't make the slightest bit of difference.
Think about what your expectations were when joining fab. Then drop them completely.
This is not dial-a-shag. And, contrary to what many think, it's NOT a sex site. Yes, people are here essentially to meet others with the aim of having sex with them, but swinging is far much more than that.
Just because someone is on fab does not mean that they are looking to shag anyone and everyone who asks. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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And you've only been on here for 2 weeks.
When I first started using fab around 8 years ago, a single guy would, on average, wait around 6 months to get that first meet. Since then that's increased to between 9 months and a year. Longer in some cases.
And that was before we had a global pandemic!
There are a lot of people who still aren't comfortable with meeting again just yet.
You need to be patient.
If you're just looking for a quick fix, you're on the wrong site. |
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When I send a message it’s always tailored to their profile, admittedly I don’t send many but it’s always about them. So look at what they’re saying and use that to express an interest and then hope your profile/ pictures are interesting enough for a reply.
Also one thing that’s very rarely advised, when to send a message. If a woman gets 100 messages a day, you need to know that’s yours can be lost amongst that 100 messages she’s received. So you need to think about when is the best time to message, not send one at 9am when she’s not on the site. |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
Thing is OP it's often not the content of the message that is the first thing people consider - many will look at your profile first and decide from that if they want to open your message - so the place to start would be looking at your profile and asking yourself if it's appealing and has enough to pique the interest of others enough to want to read the message.
Does it have well thought out and tasteful pics and text that gives a reader a flavour of who you are, what you're looking for and what you think you can offer? If it doesn't then concentrate on getting that right first.
As for the message itself, there is no magic formula - everyone is different and likes different styles which I know doesn't make it easy, but take your cue from the recipients profile where you can. Or, on the few occasions I have sent messages "blind" I've sent a brief introduction, why I'm writing, a little about me and what appealed to me about their profile and invited them to take a look at mine - I'd invariably get a reply even if it was a polite no thanks.
Remember too to accept a no thank you (whether an actual one or a no reply one) with good grace.
Finally, remember that just sending messages "blind" is not the only way to approach the site and get meets - the forums and chat rooms are great ways to get to know people and them you, or group socials and clubs are another. |
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"And you've only been on here for 2 weeks.
When I first started using fab around 8 years ago, a single guy would, on average, wait around 6 months to get that first meet. Since then that's increased to between 9 months and a year. Longer in some cases.
And that was before we had a global pandemic!
There are a lot of people who still aren't comfortable with meeting again just yet.
You need to be patient.
If you're just looking for a quick fix, you're on the wrong site."
to be fair I only put it on to get folk chatting see if somebody would chat to me but didn’t happen |
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