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Just for laughs

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By *parkle1974 OP   Woman  over a year ago

Leeds

Had my photo taken with REM

That's me in the corner....

Let's hear some of your jokes x

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By *hunky GentMan  over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

Scientists have found that beer contains female hormones:

After giving 25 men 10 points each - they all talked bollocks and none of them could drive.

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By *gent CoulsonMan  over a year ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

The band U2 recently developed a GPS...

It's terrible! The streets have no name, and I still haven't found what I'm looking for!

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By *gent CoulsonMan  over a year ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

What band do elderly people try to avoid?

The Strokes

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By *parkle1974 OP   Woman  over a year ago

Leeds

Steve Jobs would have been a better president than Trump

But I guess comparing apples to oranges is a bit unfair

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By *parkle1974 OP   Woman  over a year ago

Leeds

If Watson isn't the best doctor

Then "Who is

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By *gent CoulsonMan  over a year ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

One for the nerds

I want to make a lord of the rings themed metal band called

Nightmare on helms deep

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By *hunky GentMan  over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough


"If Watson isn't the best doctor

Then "Who is"

Dr No.

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By *ocksareoffMan  over a year ago

Out n About


"One for the nerds

I want to make a lord of the rings themed metal band called

Nightmare on helms deep"

That sounds a bit fruity.

All I can think of is. What do you call a one legged woman dancer?

Ilean.

Yeah I'll close the door on my way out

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By *imply_SensualMan  over a year ago

Widnes

I am jealous of my crush’s heart, because it’s pumping away inside her and I’m not

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By *gent CoulsonMan  over a year ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

I was at a bar once, and the band played "Jump"

.. and everyone jumped. Then the band played "Twist and Shout" and everyone twisted and shouted.

Then the band played "Come on Eileen". Poor Eileen!

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By *vriderMan  over a year ago

Chester

What do you call a judge with no hands?

Justice fingers

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By *imbobaMan  over a year ago

Glasgow


"I was at a bar once, and the band played "Jump"

.. and everyone jumped. Then the band played "Twist and Shout" and everyone twisted and shouted.

Then the band played "Come on Eileen". Poor Eileen!"

Have you seen the photo meme of that one? Hilarious.

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By *parkle1974 OP   Woman  over a year ago

Leeds

Why should you never brush your teeth with your left hand....

Because a toothbrush works better

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I got stung by a Bee last week.

Can you believe it, £30 for a jar of honey!

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By *parkle1974 OP   Woman  over a year ago

Leeds

Elton Johan has just bought his rabbit a treadmill

It's a little fit bunny

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Why should you never brush your teeth with your left hand....

Because a toothbrush works better "

Oh dear. Someone's been on the gin

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By *parkle1974 OP   Woman  over a year ago

Leeds

I recently took a pole

And found that 100% of people in the tent were angry when it collapsed

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By *gent CoulsonMan  over a year ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

I watched a UB40 tribute band called WD40.

They were a bit rusty at first, but got better as the evening went on.

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By *parkle1974 OP   Woman  over a year ago

Leeds


"Why should you never brush your teeth with your left hand....

Because a toothbrush works better

Oh dear. Someone's been on the gin "

Just trying to lighten the mood

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By *gent CoulsonMan  over a year ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines


"I recently took a pole

And found that 100% of people in the tent were angry when it collapsed "

pmsl

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

What did the cheese say when it looked in the mirror?

halloumi

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By *gent CoulsonMan  over a year ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

What do you call Nikola Tesla and Thomas Edison's band?

AC/DC

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman  over a year ago

evesham

What footwear do abductors wear?

White vans

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By *parkle1974 OP   Woman  over a year ago

Leeds


"What footwear do abductors wear?

White vans "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Why should you never brush your teeth with your left hand....

Because a toothbrush works better

Oh dear. Someone's been on the gin

Just trying to lighten the mood "

I know lol

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By *parkle1974 OP   Woman  over a year ago

Leeds

Freddie Mercury, Bruno Mars and Venus Williams walked in to a bar

They didn't planet..

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Football player found fixed to a wall

Police say it's Danny wallclock

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By *parkle1974 OP   Woman  over a year ago

Leeds

My boss hates it when I shorten his name to Dick

Especially since his name is Steve

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By *parkle1974 OP   Woman  over a year ago

Leeds

People are usually shocked when they find out I'm not a good electrician

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"My boss hates it when I shorten his name to Dick

Especially since his name is Steve "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

How do desk fans avoid Coronavirus?

They self-oscillate.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

These are great OP, thanks for spreading the cheer !

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By *agicfingers1Man  over a year ago

near Brighton

What do you call a bear with no teeth....

A gummy bear

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By *gent CoulsonMan  over a year ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

I quit the band I was in

now I just play with myself

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By *agicfingers1Man  over a year ago

near Brighton

What do you call a deer with no eyes....

No idea

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By *agicfingers1Man  over a year ago

near Brighton

Got a new job playing the triangle in a reggae band....

I just stand at the back an ting

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By *ffshoreguy4funMan  over a year ago

Glasgow

My mate just failed his Aboriginal music exam

So I asked

did yi redo it

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By *gent CoulsonMan  over a year ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

I used to be in a band called the radiators...

We were a warm up act,

Then I joined the duvets. We did mainly covers

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Why did the punk cross the road

He was stapled to the chicken

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By *parkle1974 OP   Woman  over a year ago

Leeds

What do you call 2 birds stuck together

Velcrows

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By *parkle1974 OP   Woman  over a year ago

Leeds

I told my cat I was going to teach him English

He said Me how...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

What do you get if you cross a South American rodent with a sex toy

An armadildo

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By *parkle1974 OP   Woman  over a year ago

Leeds

What do you call a sick Eagle

Illegal

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By *parkle1974 OP   Woman  over a year ago

Leeds

What's the opposite of croissant

A happy uncle

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By *agicfingers1Man  over a year ago

near Brighton

My friends Ariel and Antenna got married

The wedding was crap but the reception was excellent

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

What flies across the day at 1000mph

The cumming of the lord

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By *parkle1974 OP   Woman  over a year ago

Leeds

I cant find my Gone in 60 seconds dvd

It was here a minute ago

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By *assing Fancies xCouple  over a year ago

Sherwood Forest

Knock knock...

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By *agicfingers1Man  over a year ago

near Brighton


"I cant find my Gone in 60 seconds dvd

It was here a minute ago"

These are getting worse by the minute

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By *agicfingers1Man  over a year ago

near Brighton


"Knock knock..."

Who's there

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams 3 nails on the counter and says "can you put me up for the night"

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By *parkle1974 OP   Woman  over a year ago

Leeds


"I cant find my Gone in 60 seconds dvd

It was here a minute ago

These are getting worse by the minute "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I got stuck in a traffic jam today

A lorry carrying snooker equipment had overturned, the cues went back for miles

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By *parkle1974 OP   Woman  over a year ago

Leeds

Just heard a man had an accident while playing peek a boo

He's currently in ICU

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Whats the definition of frustrated.

One armed man hanging off a cliff with an itch

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By *agicfingers1Man  over a year ago

near Brighton

What do you call someone that lives next to a horse....

His neigh-bour

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Elton Johan has just bought his rabbit a treadmill

It's a little fit bunny "

Elton Johan

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By *ocksareoffMan  over a year ago

Out n About

Haha there's some right beauties on here tonight.

What do you call a Spaniard that's left hospital?

Manwell

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By *parkle1974 OP   Woman  over a year ago

Leeds

What cheese is made backwards

Edam

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"What cheese is made backwards

Edam "

I don't like cheese

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By *uvhandle20Man  over a year ago

SE London

Arnold Schwarzenegger has a new film: it is about German composers.

He will be Bach

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By *agicfingers1Man  over a year ago

near Brighton

Why was 6 afraid of 7...

Coz 7 8 9

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By *parkle1974 OP   Woman  over a year ago

Leeds

My neighbour told me he was scared to plant an apple tree

I told him to grow a pear

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Had my photo taken with REM

That's me in the corner....

Let's hear some of your jokes x"

Boy scouts,

Girl guides.

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By *parkle1974 OP   Woman  over a year ago

Leeds

How do you make antifreeze

Take away her blanket

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By *parkle1974 OP   Woman  over a year ago

Leeds

What's the leading cause of dry skin

Towels

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"What's the leading cause of dry skin

Towels "

You quite clearly spent too many nights at Batley Frontier

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By *assing Fancies xCouple  over a year ago

Sherwood Forest


"Knock knock...

Who's there "

Horten hears a....

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By *agicfingers1Man  over a year ago

near Brighton


"Knock knock...

Who's there Horten hears a...."

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By *assing Fancies xCouple  over a year ago

Sherwood Forest

What does a house wear???

.... Address

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By *assing Fancies xCouple  over a year ago

Sherwood Forest

A family of horses just moved in next door.... I hope they are good Neigh...bours

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