Ghostbusters !!!
After a 2 year relationship the woman I am in love with has turned into a ghost .
It was only really pointed out to me yesterday when I met friends that this was indeed what had happened to me . I’ve been ghosted .
I heard the term used many times but never actually thought about what it entails fully , it would appear though my friends are correct .
It happened or at least I felt the withdrawal about 6 weeks ago , then suddenly “ bosh “ all communication blocked , social media , everything as far as I know .
We were together long enough that of course I know that ultimately I could make contact if I really needed to . However as one of my friends pointed out ( and seemed to be the general feeling ) is that one should not chase ghosts , that one should try to draw a line under the confusion and sadness left . And whilst it may be difficult to “ move on “ whilst of course still in love , that is what one must do ..
What are others viewpoint on chasing ghosts ? How do you proceed , is there any ghost busting advice ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ghostbusters !!!
After a 2 year relationship the woman I am in love with has turned into a ghost .
It was only really pointed out to me yesterday when I met friends that this was indeed what had happened to me . I’ve been ghosted .
I heard the term used many times but never actually thought about what it entails fully , it would appear though my friends are correct .
It happened or at least I felt the withdrawal about 6 weeks ago , then suddenly “ bosh “ all communication blocked , social media , everything as far as I know .
We were together long enough that of course I know that ultimately I could make contact if I really needed to . However as one of my friends pointed out ( and seemed to be the general feeling ) is that one should not chase ghosts , that one should try to draw a line under the confusion and sadness left . And whilst it may be difficult to “ move on “ whilst of course still in love , that is what one must do ..
What are others viewpoint on chasing ghosts ? How do you proceed , is there any ghost busting advice ? "
Damn im sorry it happened to you and it sucked that you were in a full relationship with her for 2 years and she literally vanished…
I think it’s one of the most painful form of emotional violence you can inflict to a person.
I was ghosted by my first boyfriend when I was 17-18 and after 1 year and a half together and some plans, he decided to block all communication and literally avoid confrontation. I had to heal myself and find in my head that I’ll never know why I’ve been ghosted and that’s horrible.
I was so distraught as I’ve thought of so many things, from something must have happened to him, to all kinds. I lost weight as I was refusing to eat, and I still have abandonment issues when I first get into relationships with guys as I am terrified of being ghosted if I’m emotionally invested.
Definitely prefer someone who’s got the guts and balls to say “listen, it’s over for X Y X reasons, I’m sorry”
I’m sure there’s a circle in hell for ghosters  |
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"Ghostbusters !!!
After a 2 year relationship the woman I am in love with has turned into a ghost .
It was only really pointed out to me yesterday when I met friends that this was indeed what had happened to me . I’ve been ghosted .
I heard the term used many times but never actually thought about what it entails fully , it would appear though my friends are correct .
It happened or at least I felt the withdrawal about 6 weeks ago , then suddenly “ bosh “ all communication blocked , social media , everything as far as I know .
We were together long enough that of course I know that ultimately I could make contact if I really needed to . However as one of my friends pointed out ( and seemed to be the general feeling ) is that one should not chase ghosts , that one should try to draw a line under the confusion and sadness left . And whilst it may be difficult to “ move on “ whilst of course still in love , that is what one must do ..
What are others viewpoint on chasing ghosts ? How do you proceed , is there any ghost busting advice ?
Damn im sorry it happened to you and it sucked that you were in a full relationship with her for 2 years and she literally vanished…
I think it’s one of the most painful form of emotional violence you can inflict to a person.
I was ghosted by my first boyfriend when I was 17-18 and after 1 year and a half together and some plans, he decided to block all communication and literally avoid confrontation. I had to heal myself and find in my head that I’ll never know why I’ve been ghosted and that’s horrible.
I was so distraught as I’ve thought of so many things, from something must have happened to him, to all kinds. I lost weight as I was refusing to eat, and I still have abandonment issues when I first get into relationships with guys as I am terrified of being ghosted if I’m emotionally invested.
Definitely prefer someone who’s got the guts and balls to say “listen, it’s over for X Y X reasons, I’m sorry”
I’m sure there’s a circle in hell for ghosters "
Sorry to hear it’s had lasting implications for you . That’s bad
I get what your saying about thinking the worst . I want to feel angry , but then feel guilty immediately after doing so . |
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"That's harsh after 2 years...
I can understand when people do it if they've only been chatting or on a couple of dates...
But she should have given you some sort of reason."
In a way I was given a reason , but it was more to do with a “ logistical “ side of the relationship rather than a fundamental flaw between us .
The reason doesn’t make sense to me and as a couple you have to work through somethings , in fact a lot of things . The disappearance though makes that impossible . And everything said before just seems now so untrue |
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"That's really horrible, I'm sorry 
Personally, I don't chase anyone. "
That’s what I’m being advised by friends not to do , chase . It’s the hardest decision though of my life , I can safely say that ..
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"Be hard for you to see it now but you dodged a bullet "
Yeah “ another bullet dodged “ now all I have to do is dodge the “ foolish feeling bullet “ and I should be ok ..
Thanks though , you are probably right |
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I don't know if I have any good advice but here if you need to talk or anything x 