FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Anyone else feel inadequate?
Anyone else feel inadequate?
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 and I absolutely know I'll feel better in an hour or two, so I don't need to take a break.
Just wondered if I'm a weirdo for the massive switcheroo in feelings or not.  | |||
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"Definitely not - it’s a funny old place that can have you flying one minute and wondering what’s going on the next. I’m sure for some they just breeze through but if it catches you at the wrong moment with the right insecurity then it can be a tough place " It is strange. More ups and downs than a rollercoaster. | |||
"I think you are feeling perfectly normal. It is the same for guys when they see another guy with a six pack and a 10 inch gun! Don't worry about it and enjoy what you have x" Aww fanks. I wasn't aware firearms were allowed on fab. But I'm just gonna go find these guns  | |||
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"Nope! Not weird at all "Erm..... to clarify..... you just mean about this, right? My weirdo credentials are firmly established in a general sense  | |||
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"I know I don't measure up physically to the hot women on here. It doesn't bother me because I have a really good personality and I'm red hot in bed "You and me both Jojo. I should switch the air con back on in the bedroom...... | |||
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"Take breaks. You rarely see or feel burnout until it's too late." I do. Not that time yet. | |||
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"No one has the power to make you feel inadequate they may try and you may be disheartened by things you see but it’s your mind that makes you feel that way…you see something and draw comparisons against yourself and you inevitably make yourself feel bad but why? Why bother about what another woman looks like? We are all worth something and something far greater than a fab or a response on a forum, remember that the next time you are skipped over in a thread or what not, it’s not the end of the world. I for one think you are a ray of sunshine who I wish could see herself the way others do, sometimes fab can leave you feeling like the queen and other times you feel flat as fuck, it’s the nature of the beast with a revolving door of new people coming in and out, hold your own and know your worth xx "I love you woman. There's more response running around my head but that I think sums it up | |||
"Yes and no" Committal as always | |||
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"You're not the only one, it's a lack of self confidence on my behalf. And I see all these stonkingly beautiful women and I feel like I can't compare. And it's not even just looks but they flirt better are funnier etc etc. I feel sometimes I fade into the background. " You're amazeballs. And you'll never be in the background in my eyes xx | |||
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"I think that is pretty normal for here. I feel the same quite often I look at some of the amazing photos on here and think nah I definitely don't fit in here. But then I think of the some of the amazing people I've met and I realise that ye some don't mind my wobbly bits. I just need to get off my ass and lose them for myself and I might have more confidence then. " When I was the slimmest and fittest I'd ever been I hated myself way more than I do now. Building confidence has to be seperate from wobbly bit removal sadly. You have a beautiful body and I hope you manage to see it. | |||
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"Oh 100%. I felt it when the meets started happening again and seeing people getting verifications left and right, wondering what was wrong with me and why no one would want to meet me. But I quickly snapped out of it and similar to before, I'd rather just let things happen instead of trying to force it "You're so wise for one so young. And so far away  | |||
"No one has the power to make you feel inadequate they may try and you may be disheartened by things you see but it’s your mind that makes you feel that way…you see something and draw comparisons against yourself and you inevitably make yourself feel bad but why? Why bother about what another woman looks like? We are all worth something and something far greater than a fab or a response on a forum, remember that the next time you are skipped over in a thread or what not, it’s not the end of the world. I for one think you are a ray of sunshine who I wish could see herself the way others do, sometimes fab can leave you feeling like the queen and other times you feel flat as fuck, it’s the nature of the beast with a revolving door of new people coming in and out, hold your own and know your worth xx
I love you woman.
There's more response running around my head but that I think sums it up "Lots of love for you too NSP and hugs | |||
"I know I don't measure up physically to the hot women on here. It doesn't bother me because I have a really good personality and I'm red hot in bed "I wish I felt like this!! I really struggle with my body image. I fought so hard to lose all my weight & 10 years ago I was where I wanted to be. Only for it to go back on (& more ) due to so much medication & being unable to exercise. It’s time to start over so I can keep up with T!!
J x | |||
"Nah it happens to everyone... yes even I have wobbles. The difference is I know when I feel like that so I don't log on. It works for me. " I think that's the issue. I just don't realise when I'm feeling like that so it suddenly smacks me upside the head. Ugh. So I need to work on self awareness. Also special awareness. I walked into the open door a moment ago because in my head it was 6 inches to the left. | |||
"No one has the power to make you feel inadequate they may try and you may be disheartened by things you see but it’s your mind that makes you feel that way…you see something and draw comparisons against yourself and you inevitably make yourself feel bad but why? Why bother about what another woman looks like? We are all worth something and something far greater than a fab or a response on a forum, remember that the next time you are skipped over in a thread or what not, it’s not the end of the world. I for one think you are a ray of sunshine who I wish could see herself the way others do, sometimes fab can leave you feeling like the queen and other times you feel flat as fuck, it’s the nature of the beast with a revolving door of new people coming in and out, hold your own and know your worth xx
I love you woman.
There's more response running around my head but that I think sums it up "Second this, I know I look for dancers posts so blinking wise and kind | |||
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"I resonate with this so much! I fight with my inner critique 24/7 and it can be hard not to push away from people who find me attractive or anything more than that because I simply cannot believe it myself. I try to take a step back out of my thoughts every now and then and say to myself, I'm the one hurting my own damn feelings here no one else haha! And it's unhealthy of me to project that on to anyone who is genuinely attracted to me! You're not alone OP! "That's exactly it! 90% of the time I can rock it..... but then WHAM! | |||
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"Just remember. the things you find attractive in a woman, are not what everyone else finds attractive. You ARE someone/s perfect someone. Be yourself and dont fall into the trap of comparing with others. " I know. Thank you. I totally rock. Because we all totally rock. Every one of us is amazing and perfectly ourself. It's just human nature to compare. | |||
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"I know I don't measure up physically to the hot women on here. It doesn't bother me because I have a really good personality and I'm red hot in bed
I wish I felt like this!! I really struggle with my body image. I fought so hard to lose all my weight & 10 years ago I was where I wanted to be. Only for it to go back on (& more ) due to so much medication & being unable to exercise. It’s time to start over so I can keep up with T!!
J x"I can totally empathize with that! Exactly what happened to me. But I've said to hell with it. My body is settled at this size and I'm learning to love it. I hope you can too. Just don't be me. Don't compare yourself. And you'll be fine xxx | |||
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"No one has the power to make you feel inadequate they may try and you may be disheartened by things you see but it’s your mind that makes you feel that way…you see something and draw comparisons against yourself and you inevitably make yourself feel bad but why? Why bother about what another woman looks like? We are all worth something and something far greater than a fab or a response on a forum, remember that the next time you are skipped over in a thread or what not, it’s not the end of the world. I for one think you are a ray of sunshine who I wish could see herself the way others do, sometimes fab can leave you feeling like the queen and other times you feel flat as fuck, it’s the nature of the beast with a revolving door of new people coming in and out, hold your own and know your worth xx
I love you woman.
There's more response running around my head but that I think sums it up
Second this, I know I look for dancers posts so blinking wise and kind "Aw thank you lovely | |||
"Not inadequate but during my hormonal time of the month I do have that feeling of "oh I'm not attractive because I'm not a certain size nor am I an incorrigible flirt on the forum". My flirting is dire, let's be honest and I'm definitely chubby. And it can make me feel a bit sad because (when I'm on my period) a part of me wants to be one of those who people lust after on the forums, who joins in the whole you have better boobs, no you do and the sort of woman that gets mentioned all the time because they have societal deemed attractive proportions. I think we all have wobbles and self doubts at some point. It's how we cope with them." Am I allowed to cope by sticking my head under my duvet and sulking? I'd like to point out..... I'm not just talking about ladies that society has deemed acceptably attractively proportional. Not by a long shot. | |||
"No. I am me. I am the only ideal I have. I don't use anyone on the planet to try to be. I'm a 5ft 4inch old bird. I'm not stupid enough to think that if I work hard enough on myself I'll sprout long legs, pouty lips and look 30 years younger. I'm great as I am. My only competition is myself and we like each other don't we Granny. Yes we do Granny. " I think that is the thing Granny. When I feel that way, Posh and Posh must have had a row and don't like each other..... | |||
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"Oh 100%. I felt it when the meets started happening again and seeing people getting verifications left and right, wondering what was wrong with me and why no one would want to meet me. But I quickly snapped out of it and similar to before, I'd rather just let things happen instead of trying to force it
You're so wise for one so young.
And so far away "Seems to be the story of our Fab lives 
But I hope you feel better soon and it's great that you recognise it as a phase as it shows you can already see light at the end of the tunnel. Also, I hope you know that your inclusive and flirty personality shines throughout here, regardless of how you compare yourself to others and that's what helps you stand out most | |||
"I think it is quite easy to feel inadequate on here as alot of the females are clearly models and have professional photos. The best thing to do is hold your head high, be yourself and don't try and be something you are not." You rock, Bee. It's not the classic modelly ladies I mean though.... | |||
" And it can make me feel a bit sad because (when I'm on my period) a part of me wants to be one of those who people lust after on the forums, who joins in the whole you have better boobs, no you do and the sort of woman that gets mentioned all the time because they have societal deemed attractive proportions. I think we all have wobbles and self doubts at some point. It's how we cope with them. Am I allowed to cope by sticking my head under my duvet and sulking? I'd like to point out..... I'm not just talking about ladies that society has deemed acceptably attractively proportional. Not by a long shot." I didn't say you were - I was talking about my periods of inadequacy and what I wobble over.  A good sulk is fine, even wallowing in it for a bit is okay. Just don't be too hard on yourself. Take some time away and talk to people who boost you, that's what I do. | |||
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"Please dont get angry with me But...it annoys me when I see attractive,good body people saying they feel inadequate for a couple of hours....I'm 49,fat and butt ugly...I wish I could feel inadequate for a couple of hours instead of the normal 24...again I'm not having a go so please dont attack me too harshly x" No anger. It's how I feel when I see it. I'm 42, fat and kinda blah and they're all gorgeous. But then maybe they look at me some time and feel the same kind of thing. Maybe we should think like that. | |||
 . All the stuff I *can* do makes me bloomin awesome | |||
"Please dont get angry with me But...it annoys me when I see attractive,good body people saying they feel inadequate for a couple of hours....I'm 49,fat and butt ugly...I wish I could feel inadequate for a couple of hours instead of the normal 24...again I'm not having a go so please dont attack me too harshly x" You often find buddy those that are very beautiful have many doubts about themselves. Some women get fed up with hearing compliments over and over. Some I chat too want a normal conversation without sex talk which doesn't get boring. A lot of people are feeling alone in the world at this time. | |||
"I call it “mental dysmorphia” you change very little from day to day but the way you perceive yourself is altering hour by hour. I think it’s part of the human condition." Oooh. That makes a lot of sense.... | |||
"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XLFEvHWD_NE" And that is one of the ways I give myself a head wobble. In fact..... I'm going to go into the garden and sing it at the top of my lungs. Sorry Ilfracombe. | |||
"Often. It’s why I keep a low profile. Until I feel better about myself I’m sure as hell not going to expect anyone else to. "You are perfectly you, and I for one think you're wonderful. You will find your self love and belief again..... you rock! | |||
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"Nope I don't. I know I'm older, I know I can't do stuff that other women can do or be tall or a sexual athlete or flirt and be all sexy yada, yada, yada but that doesn't make me inadequate or even adequate . All the stuff I *can* do makes me bloomin awesome "What are great attitude to life you have
I've been feeling a bit down over the last few months, then had a bit of a light bulb moment and thought.... fuck it, I am what I am and lucky to be alive! So just live each day as it comes now | |||
"Oh 100%. I felt it when the meets started happening again and seeing people getting verifications left and right, wondering what was wrong with me and why no one would want to meet me. But I quickly snapped out of it and similar to before, I'd rather just let things happen instead of trying to force it
You're so wise for one so young.
And so far away
Seems to be the story of our Fab lives
But I hope you feel better soon and it's great that you recognise it as a phase as it shows you can already see light at the end of the tunnel. Also, I hope you know that your inclusive and flirty personality shines throughout here, regardless of how you compare yourself to others and that's what helps you stand out most "I'm awesome. And I'm over it already. I was not long after I posted the thread. But thank you xxxx | |||
"So it is one of those days. I'm feeling like poop (not literal poop because that would be weird and kinda eww) and I've come on to fab for a perve and a flirt. And I see all the gorgeous ladies profile pics...... and suddenly I'm feeling completely inadequate and don't understand why anyone would fancy me when they're all so sexy. Why does that happen? Why on one day is it that you can feel like crud and still totally rock the fab forum flirt experience and the next it leaves you feeling worse? I don't need compliments or smoke blown up my butt by the way. I'll take an arse licking but only in person and I absolutely know I'll feel better in an hour or two, so I don't need to take a break.
Just wondered if I'm a weirdo for the massive switcheroo in feelings or not. "Ah I totally understand, I have them days too where I just can’t seem to like myself and just focus on why this person is so gorgeous and I’m not. And basically going down the rabbit hole of not being enough. But I think a lot of it is us creating these negative thoughts to bring us down, we are our worst enemies sometimes … Take some time to do something you enjoy OP and hopefully you will get back to your senses x x | |||
" And it can make me feel a bit sad because (when I'm on my period) a part of me wants to be one of those who people lust after on the forums, who joins in the whole you have better boobs, no you do and the sort of woman that gets mentioned all the time because they have societal deemed attractive proportions. I think we all have wobbles and self doubts at some point. It's how we cope with them. Am I allowed to cope by sticking my head under my duvet and sulking? I'd like to point out..... I'm not just talking about ladies that society has deemed acceptably attractively proportional. Not by a long shot. I didn't say you were - I was talking about my periods of inadequacy and what I wobble over. A good sulk is fine, even wallowing in it for a bit is okay. Just don't be too hard on yourself. Take some time away and talk to people who boost you, that's what I do. "I didn't mean you were saying I was saying..... Just wanted to say I wasn't saying. I do that too. I want a cuddle though | |||
"I love what a supportive bunch you all are "They're awesome, aren't they! | |||
"Nope I don't. I know I'm older, I know I can't do stuff that other women can do or be tall or a sexual athlete or flirt and be all sexy yada, yada, yada but that doesn't make me inadequate or even adequate . All the stuff I *can* do makes me bloomin awesome "If I grow up I really, really want to be you. Not actually you, that would be weird and you are you so I can't be you after all. But me. With an attitude more like yours. You ARE bloomin awesome. | |||
"I call it “mental dysmorphia” you change very little from day to day but the way you perceive yourself is altering hour by hour. I think it’s part of the human condition." One hundred percent agree with this. How we feel about ourselves is all in how we think of ourselves. We change very little but our perception of ourselves can change from reasonably fine to the lowest of the low which makes makes us feel as dull as ditch water and ugly as sin. When I feel like that I try to be kind to myself and accept that it will pass as its not true as I'm no different from the day before. I avoid making comparisons with others at all cost as it destroys the soul. All women have value and are attractive to someone. Some are showy highly appreciated lily's, some sophisticated roses others beautiful cheerful daisies. All gorgeous in their own way x | |||
"I love what a supportive bunch you all are
They're awesome, aren't they! "As are you  xx | |||
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"Happens all the time. Xx" It sucks. For the record.... I think your pictures are stunning | |||
"So it is one of those days. I'm feeling like poop (not literal poop because that would be weird and kinda eww) and I've come on to fab for a perve and a flirt. And I see all the gorgeous ladies profile pics...... and suddenly I'm feeling completely inadequate and don't understand why anyone would fancy me when they're all so sexy. Why does that happen? Why on one day is it that you can feel like crud and still totally rock the fab forum flirt experience and the next it leaves you feeling worse? I don't need compliments or smoke blown up my butt by the way. I'll take an arse licking but only in person and I absolutely know I'll feel better in an hour or two, so I don't need to take a break.
Just wondered if I'm a weirdo for the massive switcheroo in feelings or not. "Oh i totally get it, and thanks for sharing your experience, so I know im not alone in being a 'switcheroo wierdo' lol. I get imposter syndrome a lot also. Ive no idea why it happens though so im no help on that score. xxxx | |||
"I do hence I’m always lurking on the forums for a bit of banter and flirting. " Always makes a person feel good that does! | |||
"Nah it happens to everyone... yes even I have wobbles. The difference is I know when I feel like that so I don't log on. It works for me. I think that's the issue. I just don't realise when I'm feeling like that so it suddenly smacks me upside the head. Ugh. So I need to work on self awareness. Also special awareness. I walked into the open door a moment ago because in my head it was 6 inches to the left." I do this, usually when I'm not present and in the moment , I'm thinking of other stuff past and future. Our monkey minds can be terribly naughty and horrid. It's ok to feel these meh moments, it's real and authentic, remember people pit their best pics up here, angle their body ect, i also hear theres super filters! If theremis something you really arent happy with and it's a reoccuring theme, that's something YOUR not happy with, not anyone else, then is there something realistic you can do? Don't think about it now, it's the wrong headspace. Im big on journaling negativity, i just free flow write, I never re read, i often find this helps as it takes it out of my mind taking away its power to slip into ruminating and catastrophising. Also rest and allow yourself too, you mentioned burn out, I too have a very close relationship with this, uet only last week did i notice a burn out which was started to slip in incognito, mainly because I recognised my drive to burn out in certain areas but hadn't ascribed it to the current, mainly because I didnt see that this small thing was a drive to burn out. I have a 3 fuck rule, if I've bashed myself, injured myself made some silly mistake which uas made me say fuck, for fuck sake fucking hell...you get the picture...the first usually goes unnoticed, second fuck I say that's the second time, your not focusing, present paying attention the thrid...right pack up, move on do something else. It's super tough accepting ourselves, we can others but are so much meaner and harder on ourselves. If you ever want to talk my inbow is open, I'd also like to have a ballgown picnic with you...I'm a ballgown and wellyboots girl...cus that is so how we roll in Devon! Heres a 15 second hug (()) | |||
"Hugs x"With boobies?
Also. Get your butt out of hiding. Else I'll smack it | |||
"Hugs x
With boobies?
Also. Get your butt out of hiding. Else I'll smack it "With boobies xx | |||
"Often. It’s why I keep a low profile. Until I feel better about myself I’m sure as hell not going to expect anyone else to.
You are perfectly you, and I for one think you're wonderful.
You will find your self love and belief again..... you rock!
"Back at ya | |||
"Nope I don't. I know I'm older, I know I can't do stuff that other women can do or be tall or a sexual athlete or flirt and be all sexy yada, yada, yada but that doesn't make me inadequate or even adequate . All the stuff I *can* do makes me bloomin awesome
What are great attitude to life you have
I've been feeling a bit down over the last few months, then had a bit of a light bulb moment and thought.... fuck it, I am what I am and lucky to be alive! So just live each day as it comes now"Yay! Lightbulb moments are the best! Well done you | |||
"I resonate with this so much! I fight with my inner critique 24/7 and it can be hard not to push away from people who find me attractive or anything more than that because I simply cannot believe it myself. I try to take a step back out of my thoughts every now and then and say to myself, I'm the one hurting my own damn feelings here no one else haha! And it's unhealthy of me to project that on to anyone who is genuinely attracted to me! You're not alone OP! "Can I just say thankyou for writing this. This is something I really needed to read. Xx
OP your not alone flower. Xx | |||
"Hugs x
With boobies?
Also. Get your butt out of hiding. Else I'll smack it
With boobies xx"Can I kiss it better afterwards? | |||
"So it is one of those days. I'm feeling like poop (not literal poop because that would be weird and kinda eww) and I've come on to fab for a perve and a flirt. And I see all the gorgeous ladies profile pics...... and suddenly I'm feeling completely inadequate and don't understand why anyone would fancy me when they're all so sexy. Why does that happen? Why on one day is it that you can feel like crud and still totally rock the fab forum flirt experience and the next it leaves you feeling worse? I don't need compliments or smoke blown up my butt by the way. I'll take an arse licking but only in person and I absolutely know I'll feel better in an hour or two, so I don't need to take a break.
Just wondered if I'm a weirdo for the massive switcheroo in feelings or not.
Ah I totally understand, I have them days too where I just can’t seem to like myself and just focus on why this person is so gorgeous and I’m not. And basically going down the rabbit hole of not being enough.
But I think a lot of it is us creating these negative thoughts to bring us down, we are our worst enemies sometimes …
Take some time to do something you enjoy OP and hopefully you will get back to your senses x x "That's it. It's the rabbit hole! I'm all good now. I kinda tripped into it but dragged myself out quickly. I'm hoping it helps people to see they're not the only ones if they feel like this xxx | |||
"Nope I don't. I know I'm older, I know I can't do stuff that other women can do or be tall or a sexual athlete or flirt and be all sexy yada, yada, yada but that doesn't make me inadequate or even adequate . All the stuff I *can* do makes me bloomin awesome
What are great attitude to life you have
I've been feeling a bit down over the last few months, then had a bit of a light bulb moment and thought.... fuck it, I am what I am and lucky to be alive! So just live each day as it comes now
Yay! Lightbulb moments are the best! Well done you "Hope you're feeling much better now. Just know you definitely aren't on your own and this is such a great community of great people looking out for eachother xx | |||
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"I can't care for you all as I hardly know you. But I'm always available if someone needs to chat and needs support with something. I can't promise a solution, but I can promise to read what you say and respond" Top man! I'll add to that to, if any of you just need a chat or to blow off some steam... I'm all ears | |||
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) and so I'll have to find my own way through it
But it's a weird kind of viscous circle to get into - you don't feel like your worthy of anyone meeting / messaging you so you don't make any effort to meet / message anyone and then get upset at the lack of meetings / messages which reinforces the low esteem
I'm sure you'll bounce back soon, though | |||
"Nope I don't. I know I'm older, I know I can't do stuff that other women can do or be tall or a sexual athlete or flirt and be all sexy yada, yada, yada but that doesn't make me inadequate or even adequate . All the stuff I *can* do makes me bloomin awesome
What are great attitude to life you have
I've been feeling a bit down over the last few months, then had a bit of a light bulb moment and thought.... fuck it, I am what I am and lucky to be alive! So just live each day as it comes now" good.
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"Nope I don't. I know I'm older, I know I can't do stuff that other women can do or be tall or a sexual athlete or flirt and be all sexy yada, yada, yada but that doesn't make me inadequate or even adequate . All the stuff I *can* do makes me bloomin awesome
If I grow up I really, really want to be you. Not actually you, that would be weird and you are you so I can't be you after all. But me. With an attitude more like yours.
You ARE bloomin awesome."Thanks You really don't want to be me. I'm horribly untidy and I leave all the ironing until the last minute .
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"I have days where I doubt myself. I wonder if I'm not pretty enough, thin enough, funny enough and then I read threads on here sometimes that says oh I hate it when people do this, say this, have this on their profile and I think ouch that's us. I also worry about whether we'll measure up in person Then I slap myself and move on. Yes it is entirely normal, we all have bad days For the record I think you're gorgeous Mandy x" You've got my vote in all areas Mandy
Definitely pretty, thin enough and funny x | |||
"So it is one of those days. I'm feeling like poop (not literal poop because that would be weird and kinda eww) and I've come on to fab for a perve and a flirt. And I see all the gorgeous ladies profile pics...... and suddenly I'm feeling completely inadequate and don't understand why anyone would fancy me when they're all so sexy. Why does that happen? Why on one day is it that you can feel like crud and still totally rock the fab forum flirt experience and the next it leaves you feeling worse? I don't need compliments or smoke blown up my butt by the way. I'll take an arse licking but only in person and I absolutely know I'll feel better in an hour or two, so I don't need to take a break.
Just wondered if I'm a weirdo for the massive switcheroo in feelings or not. "Not weird at all... Heck I have my wobbles all the time about my wobbles x | |||
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"Anyone else feel inadequate?" No, but if they fancy a good grope then I can be HTH! | |||
. Have your observe your thoughts, watch them pass, and allow them to leave.
Love you | |||
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"Hmmm, do I feel inadequate? Kinda. Sometimes. I'll try to explain and it'll probably sound like I'm full of myself. I am and I'm totally not all at the same time. Here goes. Yes, I feel inadequate as in I cannot offer the same as other people, whether that's a "hot body" or time or attention or affection or just plain old flirting. I can't flirt for the sake of it, feels disingenuous to me unless I've genuine interest in someone. And here's why I'm not actually inadequate despite what my brain sometimes tries to tell me..... I'm simply different. I'm a walking contradiction. I'm brave yet cower at things others don't bat an eyelid at, "normal" things. I'm really quite precious despite my rough n ready tomboy side. So if I apply the "inadequate" word to myself in regards to other people then the same must be said for other people when it comes to me, they cannot meet my needs therefore they're inadequate? No. I'll say it again, they simply don't meet my needs. No more or less than that. " I think your awesome but I also know it means nothing to you when a stranger says that.... but keep being you x | |||
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"Hmmm, do I feel inadequate? Kinda. Sometimes. I'll try to explain and it'll probably sound like I'm full of myself. I am and I'm totally not all at the same time. Here goes. Yes, I feel inadequate as in I cannot offer the same as other people, whether that's a "hot body" or time or attention or affection or just plain old flirting. I can't flirt for the sake of it, feels disingenuous to me unless I've genuine interest in someone. And here's why I'm not actually inadequate despite what my brain sometimes tries to tell me..... I'm simply different. I'm a walking contradiction. I'm brave yet cower at things others don't bat an eyelid at, "normal" things. I'm really quite precious despite my rough n ready tomboy side. So if I apply the "inadequate" word to myself in regards to other people then the same must be said for other people when it comes to me, they cannot meet my needs therefore they're inadequate? No. I'll say it again, they simply don't meet my needs. No more or less than that. I think your awesome but I also know it means nothing to you when a stranger says that.... but keep being you x" Thank you, I do appreciate it | |||
"Hmmm, do I feel inadequate? Kinda. Sometimes. I'll try to explain and it'll probably sound like I'm full of myself. I am and I'm totally not all at the same time. Here goes. Yes, I feel inadequate as in I cannot offer the same as other people, whether that's a "hot body" or time or attention or affection or just plain old flirting. I can't flirt for the sake of it, feels disingenuous to me unless I've genuine interest in someone. And here's why I'm not actually inadequate despite what my brain sometimes tries to tell me..... I'm simply different. I'm a walking contradiction. I'm brave yet cower at things others don't bat an eyelid at, "normal" things. I'm really quite precious despite my rough n ready tomboy side. So if I apply the "inadequate" word to myself in regards to other people then the same must be said for other people when it comes to me, they cannot meet my needs therefore they're inadequate? No. I'll say it again, they simply don't meet my needs. No more or less than that. I think your awesome but I also know it means nothing to you when a stranger says that.... but keep being you x" Me too, a proper fighter. To have been through everything you’ve been through, would have broken most people, but you’re still fighting. You’re amazing  | |||
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Hope you feel better soon, lovely. Keep remembering it's just a phase, it will pass | |||
"So it is one of those days. I'm feeling like poop (not literal poop because that would be weird and kinda eww) and I've come on to fab for a perve and a flirt. And I see all the gorgeous ladies profile pics...... and suddenly I'm feeling completely inadequate and don't understand why anyone would fancy me when they're all so sexy. Why does that happen? Why on one day is it that you can feel like crud and still totally rock the fab forum flirt experience and the next it leaves you feeling worse? I don't need compliments or smoke blown up my butt by the way. I'll take an arse licking but only in person and I absolutely know I'll feel better in an hour or two, so I don't need to take a break.
Just wondered if I'm a weirdo for the massive switcheroo in feelings or not. "I know exactly what you mean op. For me it’s a combination of a post menopause body that’s about 2 stones heavier than my pre-menopause one - and a roller coaster year! In 3 months I’ve moved house, my mum’s died, I’ve started a new job that I love - then on Monday been fired from said job so I’m on the scrap heap! My normally very happy and optimistic self is a wee bit battered if I’m honest. Then I look in the mirror and see a pot belly and flabby thighs - what a catch!
For what it’s worth though - I think you’re great! | |||
Miss S x | |||
x
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"So it is one of those days. I'm feeling like poop (not literal poop because that would be weird and kinda eww) and I've come on to fab for a perve and a flirt. And I see all the gorgeous ladies profile pics...... and suddenly I'm feeling completely inadequate and don't understand why anyone would fancy me when they're all so sexy. Why does that happen? Why on one day is it that you can feel like crud and still totally rock the fab forum flirt experience and the next it leaves you feeling worse? I don't need compliments or smoke blown up my butt by the way. I'll take an arse licking but only in person and I absolutely know I'll feel better in an hour or two, so I don't need to take a break.
Just wondered if I'm a weirdo for the massive switcheroo in feelings or not.
I know exactly what you mean op.
For me it’s a combination of a post menopause body that’s about 2 stones heavier than my pre-menopause one - and a roller coaster year!
In 3 months I’ve moved house, my mum’s died, I’ve started a new job that I love - then on Monday been fired from said job so I’m on the scrap heap!
My normally very happy and optimistic self is a wee bit battered if I’m honest.
Then I look in the mirror and see a pot belly and flabby thighs - what a catch!
For what it’s worth though - I think you’re great! "Oh sweetie! I don't know you, but this made me sad. Fucking menopause!!! Big hugs & love to you x | |||
"No one has the power to make you feel inadequate they may try and you may be disheartened by things you see but it’s your mind that makes you feel that way…you see something and draw comparisons against yourself and you inevitably make yourself feel bad but why? Why bother about what another woman looks like? We are all worth something and something far greater than a fab or a response on a forum, remember that the next time you are skipped over in a thread or what not, it’s not the end of the world. I for one think you are a ray of sunshine who I wish could see herself the way others do, sometimes fab can leave you feeling like the queen and other times you feel flat as fuck, it’s the nature of the beast with a revolving door of new people coming in and out, hold your own and know your worth xx "Beautifully put. You are enough, OP. Even on a shitty day, you are enough. X | |||
"I do hence I’m always lurking on the forums for a bit of banter and flirting. Always makes a person feel good that does!" Hugs | |||
"So it is one of those days. I'm feeling like poop (not literal poop because that would be weird and kinda eww) and I've come on to fab for a perve and a flirt. And I see all the gorgeous ladies profile pics...... and suddenly I'm feeling completely inadequate and don't understand why anyone would fancy me when they're all so sexy. Why does that happen? Why on one day is it that you can feel like crud and still totally rock the fab forum flirt experience and the next it leaves you feeling worse? I don't need compliments or smoke blown up my butt by the way. I'll take an arse licking but only in person and I absolutely know I'll feel better in an hour or two, so I don't need to take a break.
Just wondered if I'm a weirdo for the massive switcheroo in feelings or not.
I know exactly what you mean op.
For me it’s a combination of a post menopause body that’s about 2 stones heavier than my pre-menopause one - and a roller coaster year!
In 3 months I’ve moved house, my mum’s died, I’ve started a new job that I love - then on Monday been fired from said job so I’m on the scrap heap!
My normally very happy and optimistic self is a wee bit battered if I’m honest.
Then I look in the mirror and see a pot belly and flabby thighs - what a catch!
For what it’s worth though - I think you’re great!
Oh sweetie!
I don't know you, but this made me sad. Fucking menopause!!!
Big hugs & love to you x"Thanks lovely. On the plus side - I fill my bra for the first time in decades! | |||
"Hmmm, do I feel inadequate? Kinda. Sometimes. I'll try to explain and it'll probably sound like I'm full of myself. I am and I'm totally not all at the same time. Here goes. Yes, I feel inadequate as in I cannot offer the same as other people, whether that's a "hot body" or time or attention or affection or just plain old flirting. I can't flirt for the sake of it, feels disingenuous to me unless I've genuine interest in someone. And here's why I'm not actually inadequate despite what my brain sometimes tries to tell me..... I'm simply different. I'm a walking contradiction. I'm brave yet cower at things others don't bat an eyelid at, "normal" things. I'm really quite precious despite my rough n ready tomboy side. So if I apply the "inadequate" word to myself in regards to other people then the same must be said for other people when it comes to me, they cannot meet my needs therefore they're inadequate? No. I'll say it again, they simply don't meet my needs. No more or less than that. " Yes! | |||
K | |||
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"So it is one of those days. I'm feeling like poop (not literal poop because that would be weird and kinda eww) and I've come on to fab for a perve and a flirt. And I see all the gorgeous ladies profile pics...... and suddenly I'm feeling completely inadequate and don't understand why anyone would fancy me when they're all so sexy. Why does that happen? Why on one day is it that you can feel like crud and still totally rock the fab forum flirt experience and the next it leaves you feeling worse? I don't need compliments or smoke blown up my butt by the way. I'll take an arse licking but only in person and I absolutely know I'll feel better in an hour or two, so I don't need to take a break.
Just wondered if I'm a weirdo for the massive switcheroo in feelings or not. "I had a I'm cruddy day yesterday ..but all those boobies in my hotlist cheered me up  | |||
"Nope I don't. I know I'm older, I know I can't do stuff that other women can do or be tall or a sexual athlete or flirt and be all sexy yada, yada, yada but that doesn't make me inadequate or even adequate . All the stuff I *can* do makes me bloomin awesome " | |||
"So it is one of those days. I'm feeling like poop (not literal poop because that would be weird and kinda eww) and I've come on to fab for a perve and a flirt. And I see all the gorgeous ladies profile pics...... and suddenly I'm feeling completely inadequate and don't understand why anyone would fancy me when they're all so sexy. Why does that happen? Why on one day is it that you can feel like crud and still totally rock the fab forum flirt experience and the next it leaves you feeling worse? I don't need compliments or smoke blown up my butt by the way. I'll take an arse licking but only in person and I absolutely know I'll feel better in an hour or two, so I don't need to take a break.
Just wondered if I'm a weirdo for the massive switcheroo in feelings or not. "If you're a weirdo kiddo, I'll gladly share weirdos corner with you x Everything you say resonates I kind of just get on with my day and know it will blow over I can't be super sexy all the time and neither can you We have to give some of the others a chance too | |||
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"My view of myself doesn't change, my botheredness with others does. " I like that answer. Can I bother you sometime? | |||
xxx | |||
