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This is not for me?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So to understand that this is not a place where a married man should look for an affair? "
Who knows what people are looking for in this Jungle...all types roam through it... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's quite simple, the majority of swingers here, don't get a joy out of potentially destroying a marriage... Even do, there are few that are looking for that... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Some women like a married man but it seems the majority do not.
but even meeting a married man to swing is not an affair ? "
I suppose it's a fantasy as well... |
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You can look. Whether you'll find it or not is a different matter.
Ask yourself why would someone want to enter into a relationship with a cheat and a liar, unless of course your wife knows all about it in which case it wouldn't be an affair. It's hardly a good starting place. |
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By *lan157Man
over a year ago
a village near Haywards Heath in East Sussex |
I don't think it is the right place to look for an affair OP. If that's your aim then perhaps state it on your profile so single women can decide if they want to get involved with you .That's not to say it does not happen because relationships have been created from people meeting on swinger sites but its generally considered undesirable if an affair results with all the hurt for the unfortunate partner when she (It normally is a woman) finds out as they always will. |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"So to understand that this is not a place where a married man should look for an affair? "
This is a site for swingers, you're not unwelcome here but alot of people (me included) will not be interested and also not approve. |
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By *hatty GuyMan
over a year ago
The Borough of St Peter |
I'm married and on here and she doesn't know. Met up with a few women too, but not for affairs, just opportunist momements. Depends what your expectations are. Some ppl are cool, some ppl are judgemental af, just brush that shit off and carry on. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm married and on here and she doesn't know. Met up with a few women too, but not for affairs, just opportunist momements. Depends what your expectations are. Some ppl are cool, some ppl are judgemental af, just brush that shit off and carry on."
Would you think your Mrs would be judgemental ? |
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By *hatty GuyMan
over a year ago
The Borough of St Peter |
"I'm married and on here and she doesn't know. Met up with a few women too, but not for affairs, just opportunist momements. Depends what your expectations are. Some ppl are cool, some ppl are judgemental af, just brush that shit off and carry on.
Would you think your Mrs would be judgemental ?"
Umm, yeh. So I probably won't be telling her. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm married and on here and she doesn't know. Met up with a few women too, but not for affairs, just opportunist momements. Depends what your expectations are. Some ppl are cool, some ppl are judgemental af, just brush that shit off and carry on.
Would you think your Mrs would be judgemental ?
Umm, yeh. So I probably won't be telling her."
Guessing your unhappy there ? |
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By *hatty GuyMan
over a year ago
The Borough of St Peter |
"I'm married and on here and she doesn't know. Met up with a few women too, but not for affairs, just opportunist momements. Depends what your expectations are. Some ppl are cool, some ppl are judgemental af, just brush that shit off and carry on.
Would you think your Mrs would be judgemental ?
Umm, yeh. So I probably won't be telling her.
Guessing your unhappy there ?"
Honestly? Not completely unhappy no. But this place has offered me the opportunity to have my cake and eat it so I'm taking that opportunity while I can. I like cake.  |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"I'm married and on here and she doesn't know. Met up with a few women too, but not for affairs, just opportunist momements. Depends what your expectations are. Some ppl are cool, some ppl are judgemental af, just brush that shit off and carry on.
Would you think your Mrs would be judgemental ?
Umm, yeh. So I probably won't be telling her.
Guessing your unhappy there ?
Honestly? Not completely unhappy no. But this place has offered me the opportunity to have my cake and eat it so I'm taking that opportunity while I can. I like cake. "
Let's hope she doesn't find out and have a complete mental breakdown and end up mentally disabled like my mother did after my dad cheated.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm married and on here and she doesn't know. Met up with a few women too, but not for affairs, just opportunist momements. Depends what your expectations are. Some ppl are cool, some ppl are judgemental af, just brush that shit off and carry on.
Would you think your Mrs would be judgemental ?
Umm, yeh. So I probably won't be telling her.
Guessing your unhappy there ?
Honestly? Not completely unhappy no. But this place has offered me the opportunity to have my cake and eat it so I'm taking that opportunity while I can. I like cake. "
Why not just leave and respect her? |
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By *hatty GuyMan
over a year ago
The Borough of St Peter |
"I'm married and on here and she doesn't know. Met up with a few women too, but not for affairs, just opportunist momements. Depends what your expectations are. Some ppl are cool, some ppl are judgemental af, just brush that shit off and carry on.
Would you think your Mrs would be judgemental ?
Umm, yeh. So I probably won't be telling her.
Guessing your unhappy there ?
Honestly? Not completely unhappy no. But this place has offered me the opportunity to have my cake and eat it so I'm taking that opportunity while I can. I like cake.
Why not just leave and respect her?"
Cos I don't want to leave her |
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There's many married men on here without their wife's knowledge, just as there's many married women in same situation.
This is a great site to be yourself. All I'd advise is to be honest. Lots of women find married men a turn on.
If you can't be good, be careful |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm married and on here and she doesn't know. Met up with a few women too, but not for affairs, just opportunist momements. Depends what your expectations are. Some ppl are cool, some ppl are judgemental af, just brush that shit off and carry on.
Would you think your Mrs would be judgemental ?
Umm, yeh. So I probably won't be telling her.
Guessing your unhappy there ?
Honestly? Not completely unhappy no. But this place has offered me the opportunity to have my cake and eat it so I'm taking that opportunity while I can. I like cake.
Let's hope she doesn't find out and have a complete mental breakdown and end up mentally disabled like my mother did after my dad cheated.
"
Im sorry to hear that...honestly..have always said its the potential devastating fallout from such things that can happen or what other devastation comes about from cheating, no one evers knows how cheating could affect people/ victims minds or how they'd react to it...to me a ride is never worth the potential risk of devastation to a persons life...especially their mental wellbeing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Op can I ask a question
How would you feel if your wife was on a site and Geting pumped off everyone
When I ask this question the normal reponce I get is they wouldn’t bl bl bl she be out on her ear and all this
So if that is your answer then why are you here
If it’s not the answer and you say you would be ok with it and such
I am going to ask why haven’t you got a couple profiles then |
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Here's what happened to us... The wife's second meet was with a guy who was married. We didn't know he was until his wife got a hold of his phone and seen we had been messaging and then had a meet set up. The wife messaged us that he was married and my wife felt horrible because he was doing it behind her back. Our fun with swinging is that it's something we share with each other and we don't want to be a party to possibly bring the cause of a breakup.
Since that time she's turned down many meets because the man had a wife, girlfriend or what have you that didn't know what he was doing.
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"I'm married and on here and she doesn't know. Met up with a few women too, but not for affairs, just opportunist momements. Depends what your expectations are. Some ppl are cool, some ppl are judgemental af, just brush that shit off and carry on.
Would you think your Mrs would be judgemental ?
Umm, yeh. So I probably won't be telling her.
Guessing your unhappy there ?
Honestly? Not completely unhappy no. But this place has offered me the opportunity to have my cake and eat it so I'm taking that opportunity while I can. I like cake.
Why not just leave and respect her?
Cos I don't want to leave her"
And what about her choice in the matter??
Doesn't she deserve to choose whether your cheating behaviour is acceptable to her not?? |
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You can have an affair with someone you meet here but this is a swingers site and unless you advertise yourself as married but cheating then you are not really being honest with the women you meet or your wife and children or yourself really .....
But yes.... you can have an affair with someone you meet from here if your morals allow it.
Why not try an affair site...... at least the women there KNOW what you are doing. Bare in mind that they are doing it too |
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By *batMan
over a year ago
Alicante, Spain. (Sometimes in Wales) |
"an affair is not swinging its pretty simple"
If you went to a swingers club and met 5 people and had sex with them in front of everybody else, I think that would be swinging. If you subsequently went home to your unknowing partner, would it then become unswinging? |
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"So to understand that this is not a place where a married man should look for an affair? "
Well having an affair isn’t swinging its cheating, there is however people on her in the same boat as you! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"an affair is not swinging its pretty simple
If you went to a swingers club and met 5 people and had sex with them in front of everybody else, I think that would be swinging. If you subsequently went home to your unknowing partner, would it then become unswinging? "
That would be fucking. The swinging part is the honesty, openness, discussion, mutual enjoyment and agreement. |
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Everyone knows this is a sex site so anything vaguely sex related, goes!
The women are all up for it and shouldn't have any standards or make moral judgements about who they wish to play with. It's a sex site, remember  |
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Fab is whatever you want to make of it, many more on here looking for relationships and on the basis lots are married, I’m sure you may find what your after.
Personally, I would never put myself in a situation where I’m someone’s dirty little secret. |
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"an affair is not swinging its pretty simple
If you went to a swingers club and met 5 people and had sex with them in front of everybody else, I think that would be swinging. If you subsequently went home to your unknowing partner, would it then become unswinging? "
If you had an unknowing partner at home, then the fact is that you would be cheating when you had sex with 5 people in the swinging club.
We think it is simple really.
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By *batMan
over a year ago
Alicante, Spain. (Sometimes in Wales) |
"If you had an unknowing partner at home, then the fact is that you would be cheating when you had sex with 5 people in the swinging club.
We think it is simple really.
"
Oh absolutely it's cheating! I was trying to show that it's also swinging. Sorry if I wasn't clear.
Gbat |
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"If you had an unknowing partner at home, then the fact is that you would be cheating when you had sex with 5 people in the swinging club.
We think it is simple really.
Oh absolutely it's cheating! I was trying to show that it's also swinging. Sorry if I wasn't clear.
Gbat "
How is it swinging? It is cheating sex.
Swinging is not just about the physical sex is it??
Although a lot of single guys seem to think that is all it is. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So to understand that this is not a place where a married man should look for an affair? "
Stick around, even if it's just for making friends and if anybody judges you just use that feature called Block |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"I'm married and on here and she doesn't know. Met up with a few women too, but not for affairs, just opportunist momements. Depends what your expectations are. Some ppl are cool, some ppl are judgemental af, just brush that shit off and carry on.
Would you think your Mrs would be judgemental ?
Umm, yeh. So I probably won't be telling her.
Guessing your unhappy there ?
Honestly? Not completely unhappy no. But this place has offered me the opportunity to have my cake and eat it so I'm taking that opportunity while I can. I like cake.
Let's hope she doesn't find out and have a complete mental breakdown and end up mentally disabled like my mother did after my dad cheated.
Im sorry to hear that...honestly..have always said its the potential devastating fallout from such things that can happen or what other devastation comes about from cheating, no one evers knows how cheating could affect people/ victims minds or how they'd react to it...to me a ride is never worth the potential risk of devastation to a persons life...especially their mental wellbeing."
That's why I hate cheating, my mother went from a fully capable adult with a great job, alot of responsibility, to being unable to work or live alone, she lives with me now.
There is no justification for it, ever. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I get a little fed up with the hypocrisy of some people
This is a swinging site... that in itself is frowned upon by the majority of people
But we all have different view points
We are all on here for our own reasons
Don’t judge others
Just go into the sweet shop and taste which you like
If you find some sweets not to your taste just accept that and eat lick or handle those that you do |
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"So to understand that this is not a place where a married man should look for an affair? "
Quite a few married men have looked for and found affairs on here. There are women happy to have affairs both married and single.
If you keep quiet about it like a lot of people do (even some very popular contributors to the forum) and just mention it in your profile you might be successful. |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"I get a little fed up with the hypocrisy of some people
This is a swinging site... that in itself is frowned upon by the majority of people
But we all have different view points
We are all on here for our own reasons
Don’t judge others
Just go into the sweet shop and taste which you like
If you find some sweets not to your taste just accept that and eat lick or handle those that you do"
No. Not when cheaters knowingly drag you into their duplicitous bullshit.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Why wouldn't this be the place for you?
If you're looking for sex and to partake in the swinging lifestyle then it's perfect. As long as you're honest with those you meet that you're cheating then it won't be an issue. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I get a little fed up with the hypocrisy of some people
This is a swinging site... that in itself is frowned upon by the majority of people
But we all have different view points
We are all on here for our own reasons
Don’t judge others
Just go into the sweet shop and taste which you like
If you find some sweets not to your taste just accept that and eat lick or handle those that you do"
I guess asking an open question in such a varied forum will always provide divisive answers. Lots of people, us included, have no time for cheaters and liars. I don't think that cheaters are excluded from swinging, it's just that originally swinging was about hedonism, openness, sexual liberation and sharing. Cheating is a sort of polar opposite to that.
As long as everyone involved has all the information to make their own mind up, people will 'adult' appropriately. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think this is a slightly more complex question.
Depends what the OPs marital situation is actually like and what they are after.
If they're looking to form a new relationship and are cheating to find a new partner before booting the old one then that does seem pretty low.
Then think about situations where someone is in a relationship where they are happy generally but one of them has no interest in sex anymore... but the other one does. Sure, in an ideal world you'd be able to tell your partner how you feel. I.e. "i love you and want to stay with you but i do need sex, do you mind if i get it elsewhere?" But thats not an easy conversation to have.
People all have their own lines they won't cross on this site and some people will judge others. You never quite known what someones personal circumstances are though. |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
Monogamous folks often conflate swinging with cheating. That’s because they look similar but aren’t.
Think of it like asking your parents to borrow £100 and taking £100 without them agreeing.
They both look the same but the latter will get you in a boat load of shit. It’s the same for swinging vs cheating |
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"I think this is a slightly more complex question.
Depends what the OPs marital situation is actually like and what they are after.
If they're looking to form a new relationship and are cheating to find a new partner before booting the old one then that does seem pretty low.
Then think about situations where someone is in a relationship where they are happy generally but one of them has no interest in sex anymore... but the other one does. Sure, in an ideal world you'd be able to tell your partner how you feel. I.e. "i love you and want to stay with you but i do need sex, do you mind if i get it elsewhere?" But thats not an easy conversation to have.
People all have their own lines they won't cross on this site and some people will judge others. You never quite known what someones personal circumstances are though. "
You don't know other people's circumstances or what goes on in their relationship, I agree. All you can do is act in the best interests of your own relationship. |
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Yeah ‘course it is. TONS of married folk on here, then there’s the other tons of folk who just don’t admit it! 
Just remember that not everyone’s interested in being part of that, and the odds as a man are slim here as it is. Throw in the extra limiting factor of being married, and that’s probably the difficulty in finding play mates.
Why not ask the misses if she wants to join too? |
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"I get a little fed up with the hypocrisy of some people
This is a swinging site... that in itself is frowned upon by the majority of people
But we all have different view points
We are all on here for our own reasons
Don’t judge others
Just go into the sweet shop and taste which you like
If you find some sweets not to your taste just accept that and eat lick or handle those that you do"
Some people go in the same sweet shop and take the sweets without asking or paying for them.
Very similar to what cheats do, in other words behave dishonestly.
You wouldn't be cheating would you? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think this is a slightly more complex question.
Depends what the OPs marital situation is actually like and what they are after.
If they're looking to form a new relationship and are cheating to find a new partner before booting the old one then that does seem pretty low.
Then think about situations where someone is in a relationship where they are happy generally but one of them has no interest in sex anymore... but the other one does. Sure, in an ideal world you'd be able to tell your partner how you feel. I.e. "i love you and want to stay with you but i do need sex, do you mind if i get it elsewhere?" But thats not an easy conversation to have.
People all have their own lines they won't cross on this site and some people will judge others. You never quite known what someones personal circumstances are though.
You don't know other people's circumstances or what goes on in their relationship, I agree. All you can do is act in the best interests of your own relationship. "
Yeah. The reason i wrote an unusually long post for me is cos its very hard to judge someones intent.
On the one hand you could have a person who just wants a bit more on the side.
On the other you could have a person whos tried to stay monogamous in a sexless relationship for years and just needs occasional sex for their sanity's sake. Even in this situation i agree that it would likely be very hurtful to the person getting cheated on if they found out...
But then the other side of that is that the other partner may well have been feeling rejected and/or ashamed for years. |
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"I think this is a slightly more complex question.
Depends what the OPs marital situation is actually like and what they are after.
If they're looking to form a new relationship and are cheating to find a new partner before booting the old one then that does seem pretty low.
Then think about situations where someone is in a relationship where they are happy generally but one of them has no interest in sex anymore... but the other one does. Sure, in an ideal world you'd be able to tell your partner how you feel. I.e. "i love you and want to stay with you but i do need sex, do you mind if i get it elsewhere?" But thats not an easy conversation to have.
People all have their own lines they won't cross on this site and some people will judge others. You never quite known what someones personal circumstances are though.
You don't know other people's circumstances or what goes on in their relationship, I agree. All you can do is act in the best interests of your own relationship.
Yeah. The reason i wrote an unusually long post for me is cos its very hard to judge someones intent.
On the one hand you could have a person who just wants a bit more on the side.
On the other you could have a person whos tried to stay monogamous in a sexless relationship for years and just needs occasional sex for their sanity's sake. Even in this situation i agree that it would likely be very hurtful to the person getting cheated on if they found out...
But then the other side of that is that the other partner may well have been feeling rejected and/or ashamed for years."
Honesty between both partners then allows BOTH to make a decision based on all the facts.
Anything else is disrespectful and dishonest in most cases. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think this is a slightly more complex question.
Depends what the OPs marital situation is actually like and what they are after.
If they're looking to form a new relationship and are cheating to find a new partner before booting the old one then that does seem pretty low.
Then think about situations where someone is in a relationship where they are happy generally but one of them has no interest in sex anymore... but the other one does. Sure, in an ideal world you'd be able to tell your partner how you feel. I.e. "i love you and want to stay with you but i do need sex, do you mind if i get it elsewhere?" But thats not an easy conversation to have.
People all have their own lines they won't cross on this site and some people will judge others. You never quite known what someones personal circumstances are though.
You don't know other people's circumstances or what goes on in their relationship, I agree. All you can do is act in the best interests of your own relationship.
Yeah. The reason i wrote an unusually long post for me is cos its very hard to judge someones intent.
On the one hand you could have a person who just wants a bit more on the side.
On the other you could have a person whos tried to stay monogamous in a sexless relationship for years and just needs occasional sex for their sanity's sake. Even in this situation i agree that it would likely be very hurtful to the person getting cheated on if they found out...
But then the other side of that is that the other partner may well have been feeling rejected and/or ashamed for years."
From a more selfish perspective, we don't want someone's hidden drama invading our lives! The last thing we want is someone's OH turning up on our doorstep as they've found meet messages on the cheaters phone. |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"I think this is a slightly more complex question.
Depends what the OPs marital situation is actually like and what they are after.
If they're looking to form a new relationship and are cheating to find a new partner before booting the old one then that does seem pretty low.
Then think about situations where someone is in a relationship where they are happy generally but one of them has no interest in sex anymore... but the other one does. Sure, in an ideal world you'd be able to tell your partner how you feel. I.e. "i love you and want to stay with you but i do need sex, do you mind if i get it elsewhere?" But thats not an easy conversation to have.
People all have their own lines they won't cross on this site and some people will judge others. You never quite known what someones personal circumstances are though.
You don't know other people's circumstances or what goes on in their relationship, I agree. All you can do is act in the best interests of your own relationship.
Yeah. The reason i wrote an unusually long post for me is cos its very hard to judge someones intent.
On the one hand you could have a person who just wants a bit more on the side.
On the other you could have a person whos tried to stay monogamous in a sexless relationship for years and just needs occasional sex for their sanity's sake. Even in this situation i agree that it would likely be very hurtful to the person getting cheated on if they found out...
But then the other side of that is that the other partner may well have been feeling rejected and/or ashamed for years."
They could leave. Simple. |
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"I think this is a slightly more complex question.
Depends what the OPs marital situation is actually like and what they are after.
If they're looking to form a new relationship and are cheating to find a new partner before booting the old one then that does seem pretty low.
Then think about situations where someone is in a relationship where they are happy generally but one of them has no interest in sex anymore... but the other one does. Sure, in an ideal world you'd be able to tell your partner how you feel. I.e. "i love you and want to stay with you but i do need sex, do you mind if i get it elsewhere?" But thats not an easy conversation to have.
People all have their own lines they won't cross on this site and some people will judge others. You never quite known what someones personal circumstances are though.
You don't know other people's circumstances or what goes on in their relationship, I agree. All you can do is act in the best interests of your own relationship.
Yeah. The reason i wrote an unusually long post for me is cos its very hard to judge someones intent.
On the one hand you could have a person who just wants a bit more on the side.
On the other you could have a person whos tried to stay monogamous in a sexless relationship for years and just needs occasional sex for their sanity's sake. Even in this situation i agree that it would likely be very hurtful to the person getting cheated on if they found out...
But then the other side of that is that the other partner may well have been feeling rejected and/or ashamed for years."
Who knows, that's the thing. We try to avoid partnered men where their other half is unaware (we'd avoid partnered women too if we met them) precisely because we don't know their situation. Life is complicated, relationships are complicated. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think this is a slightly more complex question.
Depends what the OPs marital situation is actually like and what they are after.
If they're looking to form a new relationship and are cheating to find a new partner before booting the old one then that does seem pretty low.
Then think about situations where someone is in a relationship where they are happy generally but one of them has no interest in sex anymore... but the other one does. Sure, in an ideal world you'd be able to tell your partner how you feel. I.e. "i love you and want to stay with you but i do need sex, do you mind if i get it elsewhere?" But thats not an easy conversation to have.
People all have their own lines they won't cross on this site and some people will judge others. You never quite known what someones personal circumstances are though.
You don't know other people's circumstances or what goes on in their relationship, I agree. All you can do is act in the best interests of your own relationship.
Yeah. The reason i wrote an unusually long post for me is cos its very hard to judge someones intent.
On the one hand you could have a person who just wants a bit more on the side.
On the other you could have a person whos tried to stay monogamous in a sexless relationship for years and just needs occasional sex for their sanity's sake. Even in this situation i agree that it would likely be very hurtful to the person getting cheated on if they found out...
But then the other side of that is that the other partner may well have been feeling rejected and/or ashamed for years.
Who knows, that's the thing. We try to avoid partnered men where their other half is unaware (we'd avoid partnered women too if we met them) precisely because we don't know their situation. Life is complicated, relationships are complicated."
Indeed they are.
And i totally understand not wanting to meet partnered people. |
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"I think this is a slightly more complex question.
Depends what the OPs marital situation is actually like and what they are after.
If they're looking to form a new relationship and are cheating to find a new partner before booting the old one then that does seem pretty low.
Then think about situations where someone is in a relationship where they are happy generally but one of them has no interest in sex anymore... but the other one does. Sure, in an ideal world you'd be able to tell your partner how you feel. I.e. "i love you and want to stay with you but i do need sex, do you mind if i get it elsewhere?" But thats not an easy conversation to have.
People all have their own lines they won't cross on this site and some people will judge others. You never quite known what someones personal circumstances are though.
You don't know other people's circumstances or what goes on in their relationship, I agree. All you can do is act in the best interests of your own relationship.
Yeah. The reason i wrote an unusually long post for me is cos its very hard to judge someones intent.
On the one hand you could have a person who just wants a bit more on the side.
On the other you could have a person whos tried to stay monogamous in a sexless relationship for years and just needs occasional sex for their sanity's sake. Even in this situation i agree that it would likely be very hurtful to the person getting cheated on if they found out...
But then the other side of that is that the other partner may well have been feeling rejected and/or ashamed for years.
They could leave. Simple. "
Have to agree with that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I think this is a slightly more complex question.
Depends what the OPs marital situation is actually like and what they are after.
If they're looking to form a new relationship and are cheating to find a new partner before booting the old one then that does seem pretty low.
Then think about situations where someone is in a relationship where they are happy generally but one of them has no interest in sex anymore... but the other one does. Sure, in an ideal world you'd be able to tell your partner how you feel. I.e. "i love you and want to stay with you but i do need sex, do you mind if i get it elsewhere?" But thats not an easy conversation to have.
People all have their own lines they won't cross on this site and some people will judge others. You never quite known what someones personal circumstances are though.
You don't know other people's circumstances or what goes on in their relationship, I agree. All you can do is act in the best interests of your own relationship.
Yeah. The reason i wrote an unusually long post for me is cos its very hard to judge someones intent.
On the one hand you could have a person who just wants a bit more on the side.
On the other you could have a person whos tried to stay monogamous in a sexless relationship for years and just needs occasional sex for their sanity's sake. Even in this situation i agree that it would likely be very hurtful to the person getting cheated on if they found out...
But then the other side of that is that the other partner may well have been feeling rejected and/or ashamed for years.
They could leave. Simple. "
They could but they could be perfectly happy in every other aspect of their lives... you never know.
I agree with what the other poster said earlier though. As a fabber there'd always be the worry that someones pissed off partner turns up at your door. |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"I get a little fed up with the hypocrisy of some people
This is a swinging site... that in itself is frowned upon by the majority of people
But we all have different view points
We are all on here for our own reasons
Don’t judge others
Just go into the sweet shop and taste which you like
If you find some sweets not to your taste just accept that and eat lick or handle those that you do"
It’s not hypocritical. Society judges a lot of things that it doesn’t understand or that is considered out of the norm, that doesn’t mean that it’s bad. Swinging isn’t the same as cheating, irrespective of how society views it.
Trying to dress it up in nice pretty metaphors only makes it sound like you’re trying to condone cheating |
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"Not impressed by a woman giving a married man advice on where to look for an extra marital affair, unless I've misunderstood your advice ?"
Who are you replying to? If you use reply+quote we can tell  |
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"So to understand that this is not a place where a married man should look for an affair? "
I’m gonna get flak for this I just know it and there’s going to be a lot of people disagreeing with my comment but here goes
I think a lot more women would happily consider meeting a married guy without his wife knowing, if they didn’t think guys were complete dip shits which ends up with the woman dealing with the fall out through a phone call from the aforementioned wife when she catches her husband fucking about |
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"So to understand that this is not a place where a married man should look for an affair?
I’m gonna get flak for this I just know it and there’s going to be a lot of people disagreeing with my comment but here goes
I think a lot more women would happily consider meeting a married guy without his wife knowing, if they didn’t think guys were complete dip shits which ends up with the woman dealing with the fall out through a phone call from the aforementioned wife when she catches her husband fucking about "
I doubt this. I think women don't meet married men because they don't want to be hanging around waiting for him to sneak away, for him to be constantly listening out for his phone, to never be seen in public with him, to be cancelled on last minute because he wife came home early, to never wear perfume in case his wife smells it etc etc. Same goes for men meeting married women. |
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"So to understand that this is not a place where a married man should look for an affair?
I’m gonna get flak for this I just know it and there’s going to be a lot of people disagreeing with my comment but here goes
I think a lot more women would happily consider meeting a married guy without his wife knowing, if they didn’t think guys were complete dip shits which ends up with the woman dealing with the fall out through a phone call from the aforementioned wife when she catches her husband fucking about
I doubt this. I think women don't meet married men because they don't want to be hanging around waiting for him to sneak away, for him to be constantly listening out for his phone, to never be seen in public with him, to be cancelled on last minute because he wife came home early, to never wear perfume in case his wife smells it etc etc. Same goes for men meeting married women. "
Oh I also agree with that but years back when my marriage collapsed in 2008 I literally had a lot of women here say “look I don’t need the hassle of her finding your phone, other than that I would” or they were just being nice |
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"So to understand that this is not a place where a married man should look for an affair?
I’m gonna get flak for this I just know it and there’s going to be a lot of people disagreeing with my comment but here goes
I think a lot more women would happily consider meeting a married guy without his wife knowing, if they didn’t think guys were complete dip shits which ends up with the woman dealing with the fall out through a phone call from the aforementioned wife when she catches her husband fucking about
I doubt this. I think women don't meet married men because they don't want to be hanging around waiting for him to sneak away, for him to be constantly listening out for his phone, to never be seen in public with him, to be cancelled on last minute because he wife came home early, to never wear perfume in case his wife smells it etc etc. Same goes for men meeting married women.
Oh I also agree with that but years back when my marriage collapsed in 2008 I literally had a lot of women here say “look I don’t need the hassle of her finding your phone, other than that I would” or they were just being nice "
Who knows. That's easily solved by not giving out your number though  |
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"So to understand that this is not a place where a married man should look for an affair?
I’m gonna get flak for this I just know it and there’s going to be a lot of people disagreeing with my comment but here goes
I think a lot more women would happily consider meeting a married guy without his wife knowing, if they didn’t think guys were complete dip shits which ends up with the woman dealing with the fall out through a phone call from the aforementioned wife when she catches her husband fucking about "
We totally disagree. Most decent people have no respect for dishonest people.
Why choose some lying prick when there are loads of decent honest chaps about?
Simple really. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"So to understand that this is not a place where a married man should look for an affair?
I’m gonna get flak for this I just know it and there’s going to be a lot of people disagreeing with my comment but here goes
I think a lot more women would happily consider meeting a married guy without his wife knowing, if they didn’t think guys were complete dip shits which ends up with the woman dealing with the fall out through a phone call from the aforementioned wife when she catches her husband fucking about "
I'd never meet a married man no matter how great at deception and hiding things from his wife he was, I would never want to be lied and cheated on and I don't want to help or be part of the reason thet hapoe s to somone, it has nothing to do with the fact I could get bounce back if she found out and got mad at me |
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"Not condoning but not judging either"
Who's judging?
Surely no one on here honestly thinks cheat, disrespect and dishonesty is ok?
You guys and girls can cheat all you want, but please do not even try to say that none of the above apply. |
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"So to understand that this is not a place where a married man should look for an affair?
I’m gonna get flak for this I just know it and there’s going to be a lot of people disagreeing with my comment but here goes
I think a lot more women would happily consider meeting a married guy without his wife knowing, if they didn’t think guys were complete dip shits which ends up with the woman dealing with the fall out through a phone call from the aforementioned wife when she catches her husband fucking about
I doubt this. I think women don't meet married men because they don't want to be hanging around waiting for him to sneak away, for him to be constantly listening out for his phone, to never be seen in public with him, to be cancelled on last minute because he wife came home early, to never wear perfume in case his wife smells it etc etc. Same goes for men meeting married women.
Oh I also agree with that but years back when my marriage collapsed in 2008 I literally had a lot of women here say “look I don’t need the hassle of her finding your phone, other than that I would” or they were just being nice
Who knows. That's easily solved by not giving out your number though "
True you practice safe sex as well then |
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"So to understand that this is not a place where a married man should look for an affair?
I’m gonna get flak for this I just know it and there’s going to be a lot of people disagreeing with my comment but here goes
I think a lot more women would happily consider meeting a married guy without his wife knowing, if they didn’t think guys were complete dip shits which ends up with the woman dealing with the fall out through a phone call from the aforementioned wife when she catches her husband fucking about
I doubt this. I think women don't meet married men because they don't want to be hanging around waiting for him to sneak away, for him to be constantly listening out for his phone, to never be seen in public with him, to be cancelled on last minute because he wife came home early, to never wear perfume in case his wife smells it etc etc. Same goes for men meeting married women.
Oh I also agree with that but years back when my marriage collapsed in 2008 I literally had a lot of women here say “look I don’t need the hassle of her finding your phone, other than that I would” or they were just being nice
Who knows. That's easily solved by not giving out your number though
True you practice safe sex as well then "
 Damn right. A ahem fuck phone is an alternative.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"These threads are always great reading especially from those who you can tell are getting a little irked.
Peace 
"
You shouldn't be agreeing with me.
You may cause a few blood vessels to burst.
Anyway, this prick is just going to lurk for a while longer |
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"These threads are always great reading especially from those who you can tell are getting a little irked.
Peace
You shouldn't be agreeing with me.
You may cause a few blood vessels to burst.
Anyway, this prick is just going to lurk for a while longer "
Never bothered me what other people do to be honest. As long as they’re honest with whoever they plan on meeting I don’t see the issue. Not my business, as mine isn’t anyone else’s business. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"These threads are always great reading especially from those who you can tell are getting a little irked.
Peace
You shouldn't be agreeing with me.
You may cause a few blood vessels to burst.
Anyway, this prick is just going to lurk for a while longer
Never bothered me what other people do to be honest. As long as they’re honest with whoever they plan on meeting I don’t see the issue. Not my business, as mine isn’t anyone else’s business. "
Praise the Lord
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"So to understand that this is not a place where a married man should look for an affair? "
Just lie about being married, Dude. I do, and always get away with it. Nobody's found out yet |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"I think this is a slightly more complex question.
Depends what the OPs marital situation is actually like and what they are after.
If they're looking to form a new relationship and are cheating to find a new partner before booting the old one then that does seem pretty low.
Then think about situations where someone is in a relationship where they are happy generally but one of them has no interest in sex anymore... but the other one does. Sure, in an ideal world you'd be able to tell your partner how you feel. I.e. "i love you and want to stay with you but i do need sex, do you mind if i get it elsewhere?" But thats not an easy conversation to have.
People all have their own lines they won't cross on this site and some people will judge others. You never quite known what someones personal circumstances are though.
You don't know other people's circumstances or what goes on in their relationship, I agree. All you can do is act in the best interests of your own relationship.
Yeah. The reason i wrote an unusually long post for me is cos its very hard to judge someones intent.
On the one hand you could have a person who just wants a bit more on the side.
On the other you could have a person whos tried to stay monogamous in a sexless relationship for years and just needs occasional sex for their sanity's sake. Even in this situation i agree that it would likely be very hurtful to the person getting cheated on if they found out...
But then the other side of that is that the other partner may well have been feeling rejected and/or ashamed for years.
They could leave. Simple.
They could but they could be perfectly happy in every other aspect of their lives... you never know.
I agree with what the other poster said earlier though. As a fabber there'd always be the worry that someones pissed off partner turns up at your door."
It's not just that, THEY might be happy and willing to cheat to stay happy but what about their partner? I don't care what anyone says, if you love your partner and are happy with them, you wouldn't cheat. |
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"So to understand that this is not a place where a married man should look for an affair?
Just lie about being married, Dude. I do, and always get away with it. Nobody's found out yet "
What a great guy. |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"I can never understand if these posts are attention seeking or real. Bizarre how people announce their affairs to the world
But not their partners.."
The best is when they expect praise for being honest to you, a complete stranger, when they can't be honest to the person they claim to love.
The mind boggles. |
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"So to understand that this is not a place where a married man should look for an affair?
Just lie about being married, Dude. I do, and always get away with it. Nobody's found out yet
What a great guy."
What a complete and utter f...... .... and a dangerous game if he's not just saying that,because if that had happened to me I'd have no problem in tracking him down and telling his wife. At least have a tiny amount of decency to give the person he wants to f... the choice. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"So to understand that this is not a place where a married man should look for an affair?
This is a site for swingers, you're not unwelcome here but alot of people (me included) will not be interested and also not approve."
Well said. Bugger off. |
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"So to understand that this is not a place where a married man should look for an affair?
Just lie about being married, Dude. I do, and always get away with it. Nobody's found out yet
What a great guy.
What a complete and utter f...... .... and a dangerous game if he's not just saying that,because if that had happened to me I'd have no problem in tracking him down and telling his wife. At least have a tiny amount of decency to give the person he wants to f... the choice. "
Well said.
If someone did that to me I would do exactly the same. |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"So to understand that this is not a place where a married man should look for an affair?
Just lie about being married, Dude. I do, and always get away with it. Nobody's found out yet
What a great guy.
What a complete and utter f...... .... and a dangerous game if he's not just saying that,because if that had happened to me I'd have no problem in tracking him down and telling his wife. At least have a tiny amount of decency to give the person he wants to f... the choice. "
I think he was joking but it fell abit flat  |
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"So to understand that this is not a place where a married man should look for an affair?
Just lie about being married, Dude. I do, and always get away with it. Nobody's found out yet
What a great guy.
What a complete and utter f...... .... and a dangerous game if he's not just saying that,because if that had happened to me I'd have no problem in tracking him down and telling his wife. At least have a tiny amount of decency to give the person he wants to f... the choice.
I think he was joking but it fell abit flat "
You can never tell in this place |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"So to understand that this is not a place where a married man should look for an affair?
Just lie about being married, Dude. I do, and always get away with it. Nobody's found out yet
What a great guy.
What a complete and utter f...... .... and a dangerous game if he's not just saying that,because if that had happened to me I'd have no problem in tracking him down and telling his wife. At least have a tiny amount of decency to give the person he wants to f... the choice.
I think he was joking but it fell abit flat
You can never tell in this place "
Very true! The OP proves that |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Swing and affair are completely different things
Swing = not a relationship but too experiment new things or do things with consent on occasion.
Affair = meeting the same or multiple people on a regular basis.
But both are cheating.
It's all to do with headspace and understanding. And some people are not interested to partake in it.
|
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"Swing and affair are completely different things
Swing = not a relationship but too experiment new things or do things with consent on occasion.
Affair = meeting the same or multiple people on a regular basis.
But both are cheating.
It's all to do with headspace and understanding. And some people are not interested to partake in it.
"
Cheating involves dishonesty.
Both are not cheating.
Everyone has their opinion of course, but we see this as a common line of thought from people who are playing around behind their partner's back and without their consent and knowledge.
Now that's cheating |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"So to understand that this is not a place where a married man should look for an affair?
Just lie about being married, Dude. I do, and always get away with it. Nobody's found out yet
What a great guy.
What a complete and utter f...... .... and a dangerous game if he's not just saying that,because if that had happened to me I'd have no problem in tracking him down and telling his wife. At least have a tiny amount of decency to give the person he wants to f... the choice. "
Just dare to try!!! |
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No judgement. Some won't care but a lot will. Remember they don't want to be a part of hurting other people. Swingers work because of great communication between partners for one thing and wouldn't appreciate being cheated on. |
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By *panddaCouple
over a year ago
West Mids |
"So to understand that this is not a place where a married man should look for an affair? "
Maybe you should make yourself aware of the definitions of cheating and swinging.
Then you can answer the question yourself. |
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