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Help ! Bad advice needed
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So today three people have given me excellent advice and I’m tired of doing the right thing.
Help me break bad for a change with the best of your worst advice.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Don't be afraid to shit in your pants every once in a while. 
Following on my gallbladder thread we need to normalise shitting your pants  "
I'm all for normalising it!!
I think we have all been there.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You should definitely drop some mentos into a bottle of Diet Co*e. That’s good advice right there
This one I’m actually thinking of doing  "
It’s fun, but stand back |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Jump leads on your dick is good for your sexual health
Which end does the red lead go on and which the black ? Asking for an enemy. red on the right black on the left  "
Thanks poly, I tried it the other way and one of my bollocks inflated like a beach ball  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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‘Keep your friends close and your enemies closer.’ Is terrible terrible advice, if anything keep your enemies in a different country, that way you can chill till they get in the country again. |
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Advice.......
Take a picture of your erect cock. Take it into work and enlarge it ( no insult intended ) then photocopy about 1 - 2 hundred of them.
Go to the pub and ask everyone to help. Give them your pic and a blob of blue tack.
Ask them if they would - when on their way home - blue tack your cock to a lampost , chippy noticeboard, bus stop ,tree etc..... complete with your phone number and a message saying .... 'it could be you' .....
oil up n wait. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If you oversell the percentage of a show with the worst lead actor ..worst script and worst director you can make a fortune when it flops "
Will you be the Bialystock to my Blooms ? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Advice.......
Take a picture of your erect cock. Take it into work and enlarge it ( no insult intended ) then photocopy about 1 - 2 hundred of them.
Go to the pub and ask everyone to help. Give them your pic and a blob of blue tack.
Ask them if they would - when on their way home - blue tack your cock to a lampost , chippy noticeboard, bus stop ,tree etc..... complete with your phone number and a message saying .... 'it could be you' .....
oil up n wait."
So like those ‘Lost Pussy’ posters but for cock ? Shall I include a rewards for the finder ? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Need to find out what the time is, simply go down to Argos and buy a cheap watch, then hey presto, there on the receipt will be the time. "
You and your good advice again. Also if they display it with 12hr clock timing it will be right at least twice a day. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Walk into a pub dressed as Hitler and tell random people it wouldn't be 2-0 on my watch"
No one rocks that little moustache anymore do they ? Time for a revival perhaps.  |
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"Call up a feminist group and ask to speak with the man in charge... "
Sweetness.... you cutie ......
Many right minded men are feminists.... so it's not far fetched that a man would be in charge of the group ( well in charge of answering the phone at least ) |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Call up a feminist group and ask to speak with the man in charge...
Sweetness.... you cutie ......
Many right minded men are feminists.... so it's not far fetched that a man would be in charge of the group ( well in charge of answering the phone at least ) "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Tell someone what you want to do for them and ask if that will do for starters?
Then they can reply with fluttery eyelashes while their gussets moisten! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Tell someone what you want to do for them and ask if that will do for starters?
Then they can reply with fluttery eyelashes while their gussets moisten! "
I do that regularly and it can’t be bad advice as I’ve only been blocked 27 times and banned twice ! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Actual advice on the presumption it’s heart/cock related;
Don’t chase someone who doesn’t want to be caught. It’ll lead to heartache……"
This is very good advice that took me years to learn. |
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"Jump leads on your dick is good for your sexual health
Which end does the red lead go on and which the black ? Asking for an enemy. red on the right black on the left
Thanks poly, I tried it the other way and one of my bollocks inflated like a beach ball "
Did you not find the little + and - just at the base of your sack? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"So today three people have given me excellent advice and I’m tired of doing the right thing.
Help me break bad for a change with the best of your worst advice.
Iron your foreskin... "
Ffs, I tried this one but forgot I was circumcised |
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"So today three people have given me excellent advice and I’m tired of doing the right thing.
Help me break bad for a change with the best of your worst advice.
Iron your foreskin...
Ffs, I tried this one but forgot I was circumcised "
Ouchie, sorry.
Now I feel bad.
Revised advice:
Repeat idea with scrotum? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"So today three people have given me excellent advice and I’m tired of doing the right thing.
Help me break bad for a change with the best of your worst advice.
Iron your foreskin...
Ffs, I tried this one but forgot I was circumcised
Ouchie, sorry.
Now I feel bad.
Revised advice:
Repeat idea with scrotum? "
Yes, it is very wrinkly so here goes. |
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"So today three people have given me excellent advice and I’m tired of doing the right thing.
Help me break bad for a change with the best of your worst advice.
Iron your foreskin...
Ffs, I tried this one but forgot I was circumcised
Ouchie, sorry.
Now I feel bad.
Revised advice:
Repeat idea with scrotum?
Yes, it is very wrinkly so here goes. "
Holds breath in anticipation..
 |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"So today three people have given me excellent advice and I’m tired of doing the right thing.
Help me break bad for a change with the best of your worst advice.
Iron your foreskin...
Ffs, I tried this one but forgot I was circumcised
Ouchie, sorry.
Now I feel bad.
Revised advice:
Repeat idea with scrotum?
Yes, it is very wrinkly so here goes.
Holds breath in anticipation..
"
I set the iron for ‘sensitive fabrics’ and now my scrotum is as smooth as a babe’s buttocks ! Thank you, as soon as I’m discharged from a & e I’ll send you photos  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"So today three people have given me excellent advice and I’m tired of doing the right thing.
Help me break bad for a change with the best of your worst advice.
Iron your foreskin...
Ffs, I tried this one but forgot I was circumcised
Ouchie, sorry.
Now I feel bad.
Revised advice:
Repeat idea with scrotum?
Yes, it is very wrinkly so here goes.
Holds breath in anticipation..
I set the iron for ‘sensitive fabrics’ and now my scrotum is as smooth as a babe’s buttocks ! Thank you, as soon as I’m discharged from a & e I’ll send you photos "
I'm waiting in anticipation |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"My bad advice to you is to tell your mum you never liked her cooking."
Actually my Mum is a terrible cook and happy to admit it ! Strangely me and my sisters are all pretty good so not in the genes. |
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"So today three people have given me excellent advice and I’m tired of doing the right thing.
Help me break bad for a change with the best of your worst advice.
Iron your foreskin...
Ffs, I tried this one but forgot I was circumcised
Ouchie, sorry.
Now I feel bad.
Revised advice:
Repeat idea with scrotum?
Yes, it is very wrinkly so here goes.
Holds breath in anticipation..
I set the iron for ‘sensitive fabrics’ and now my scrotum is as smooth as a babe’s buttocks ! Thank you, as soon as I’m discharged from a & e I’ll send you photos "
Result!! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"When you get onto a tube train in London it is customary to shake hands with everybody in the carriage.
And they say Londoners aren’t friendly
We’re not, fuck off!
"
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