FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Is this a new ploy to get women to reply?
Is this a new ploy to get women to reply?
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In the last few days, I think I've had 4 or 5 men message saying something along the lines of recognising me from somewhere else and that we had spoken on there. 2 went on to claim that we had arranged to meet and the others were just I recognise your body/your photos.
Is this just a common ploy that's now being used to make you think rapport/connection has previously been established or worried that your photos are being used elsewhere?
The first time I had a message like that, I only had one public photo and it was brand new so highly unlikely to have been used elsewhere and certainly not historically. |
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Yeah it's a ploy 99/100 times.
"Hi again Susan, we chatted on another site/at x club/the social"
You reply
"No we didn't and my name isn't Susan"
"Oh sorry, how are you anyway? Would you like to meet me?"
Not actual messages but you can see how it works
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By *sm265Woman
over a year ago
Shangri-la |
Yes, I've had a few like that, when I've called them out on it, saying there's no history of them ever messaging me, they say they've had to make a new profile for some reason blah blah blah. It's total bullshit of course. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Was doing that when social media dating first started.
I'd tell a bird 12 years younger than me I knew her from school or seen her out last month..
I'd laugh at the replies  |
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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago
hiding from cock pics |
Yes it's commonly used, along with "we've spoken before", and what they mean by that is they've messaged and I've politely said "no thank you" if I've replied at all.
Or that they have messaged me from a previous profile, once again which I've replied " no thank you" to.
Or literally purposely pretending to have you confused with somebody else like, "hi Karen lovely to see you on here again" I feel just an effort to get you to chat and explain you aren't Karen, but it has started the conversation |
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"There's also the "great chat last night on kik, thanks for giving me your fab profile name so we could continue here" as a way to gain a response.
"
Actually, I discovered Fab by a random WhatsApp message from an unsaved number, saying "Nice to see you in the pub last last night (insert wrong name), hope to see you again soon".
I responded that I hadn't been in the pub and didn't know him. He then reeled off a load of other places he may know me from? Including Fab. Quite creepy really and obviously a serial "playa". |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My best ever was send a message about her wallpaper...
Along the lines of Oi that wallpapers giving me a migraine you better have better in the bedroom.
Yeah I'm a cheeky fucker  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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What a shower of shit they are......anyway.....I met you in a past life your name was Mabel, you and I were star crossed lovers. I worked the fields and you worked in the big house as a scullery maid, it was forbidden love as we could not be......yet.....we were. Sneaking off at night to the barn to make wild passionate love till morning. But old Mrs McClure found out about it, and had you sent to the mill and had me working the horses.
Anyway now we've established a rapport, give us a wank |
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Its completely a ploy.
I've normally got men blocked but sometimes open my filters for a forum game and one guy messaged to say we should play in a club again as he enjoyed it so much the last time.....ive never played with a guy in a club and never would so he was just trying it on.
The depths some will go to to try and get a response from you is nuts and it's no wonder men are often seen as guilty of crap before they even say hello. |
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"What a shower of shit they are......anyway.....I met you in a past life your name was Mabel, you and I were star crossed lovers. I worked the fields and you worked in the big house as a scullery maid, it was forbidden love as we could not be......yet.....we were. Sneaking off at night to the barn to make wild passionate love till morning. But old Mrs McClure found out about it, and had you sent to the mill and had me working the horses.
Anyway now we've established a rapport, give us a wank
"
Smoooooth, no way that could fail. |
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"What a shower of shit they are......anyway.....I met you in a past life your name was Mabel, you and I were star crossed lovers. I worked the fields and you worked in the big house as a scullery maid, it was forbidden love as we could not be......yet.....we were. Sneaking off at night to the barn to make wild passionate love till morning. But old Mrs McClure found out about it, and had you sent to the mill and had me working the horses.
Anyway now we've established a rapport, give us a wank"
That'll knock 'em bandy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What a shower of shit they are......anyway.....I met you in a past life your name was Mabel, you and I were star crossed lovers. I worked the fields and you worked in the big house as a scullery maid, it was forbidden love as we could not be......yet.....we were. Sneaking off at night to the barn to make wild passionate love till morning. But old Mrs McClure found out about it, and had you sent to the mill and had me working the horses.
Anyway now we've established a rapport, give us a wank
That'll knock 'em bandy "
But it's true, my spirtalist said so.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I hate this, I definitely think it is a ploy to get a response. I get it almost everyday. People pretending we’ve spoken before, people messaging saying thanks for the wink, when I never winked, people saying they’ve found me on tinder, or they know who I am when actually they’ve no clue and call me a different name.. the list goes on!
I had a guy yesterday goes ‘Hello again Toni’, I said I’m not Toni then it was ‘why did you tell me your name was Toni when we last spoke and I’ve seen you on Tinder’  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's not a new thing. It annoys me but I can't blame them for trying. It must be soul destroying to send messages and not get any replies at all.  Men are human too. |
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Ha I had that once in the chat room and my face wasn’t even on cam. A guy claimed to have seen me out and about. At first it freaked me out then I realised he had no real information.
But it’s only happen the once, now I’ll be more wary, thanks for the heads up
Bx |
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"It's not a new thing. It annoys me but I can't blame them for trying. It must be soul destroying to send messages and not get any replies at all. Men are human too. "
So it's OK to resort to lying and blatant con tricks to get replies from women? If they weren't doing so much of this thus shit, all men would have a much easier time on here as women wouldn't be so worn down and suspicious.
We don't owe them anything and resorting to click bait lies that could actually panic some women, shows how entitled some of them are. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've had messages using the same ploy, I'm not a piece of meat you know"
But surely, just like all Fab women, you’re on a sex site and should expect to be treated like that.  |
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"my received popular lines nowadays is ‘May I ask you something?’ 8/10 men approaching that way, any other getting this as well? "
The first time I received that, I didn't know it was a ploy, so I responded. The reply that came was a long-ass, badly written eroiric fiction scenario.
Never respond to "can I ask you a question?" messages. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Never respond to "can I ask you a question?" messages."
I always respond to those kind of opening messages by telling them that I enforce a strict one question only policy...and that they'd just used up their quota. |
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It's this type of stuff thst made me delete the last profile. Start of 1st lockdown these ppl just ruin everything for all no wonder blokes get tarred with the same brush
guilty till proven inocent
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"my received popular lines nowadays is ‘May I ask you something?’ 8/10 men approaching that way, any other getting this as well?
The first time I received that, I didn't know it was a ploy, so I responded. The reply that came was a long-ass, badly written eroiric fiction scenario.
Never respond to "can I ask you a question?" messages."
I once did and had a very similar experience so not responding anymore  |
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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago
Calderdale innit |
Yes had people try to insist they'd met me in past,
Wrong name or area or even job.
They even say things like long time no speak and as a site supporter you can see if you've been in contact before.
They just hope you'll overlook that you haven't spoken and want to chat. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's not a new thing. It annoys me but I can't blame them for trying. It must be soul destroying to send messages and not get any replies at all. Men are human too.
So it's OK to resort to lying and blatant con tricks to get replies from women? If they weren't doing so much of this thus shit, all men would have a much easier time on here as women wouldn't be so worn down and suspicious.
We don't owe them anything and resorting to click bait lies that could actually panic some women, shows how entitled some of them are."
Not all men are con artists hell bent on nefarious activities. Some may genuinely think they know the person.
We are often told on here that the bad men make the good men stand out and that the bad men don't spoil it for everyone. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yup this has happened to me a lot.. especially having a second profile.
'Yeah we spoke on your last profile and agreed to meet'
They seem to mistake me for a goldfish that cannot remember  |
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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago
Maldon and Peterborough |
"Yup this has happened to me a lot.. especially having a second profile.
'Yeah we spoke on your last profile and agreed to meet'
They seem to mistake me for a goldfish that cannot remember "
Oh hello Dory, fancy seeing you here. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I did actually have this conversation with someone just a few weeks ago and it was legitimate - I’d spoken to her on another app, which had a really good Feel(d) about it - and struck up a conversation here too.
I realise this is a minority statement |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yup this has happened to me a lot.. especially having a second profile.
'Yeah we spoke on your last profile and agreed to meet'
They seem to mistake me for a goldfish that cannot remember
Oh hello Dory, fancy seeing you here. "
Just keep swimming swimming swimming |
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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago
Maldon and Peterborough |
"Yup this has happened to me a lot.. especially having a second profile.
'Yeah we spoke on your last profile and agreed to meet'
They seem to mistake me for a goldfish that cannot remember
Oh hello Dory, fancy seeing you here.
Just keep swimming swimming swimming "
Mine, mine, mine, mine, mine...... |
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We've had a few random messages from couples we've never met saying we need to catch as they're back in our area and it's "been to long". Just assumed they had us confused with someone else.
After reading this thread, yeah, I'm just thinking it's a guys using confidence tricks.. |
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"In the last few days, I think I've had 4 or 5 men message saying something along the lines of recognising me from somewhere else and that we had spoken on there. 2 went on to claim that we had arranged to meet and the others were just I recognise your body/your photos.
Is this just a common ploy that's now being used to make you think rapport/connection has previously been established or worried that your photos are being used elsewhere?
The first time I had a message like that, I only had one public photo and it was brand new so highly unlikely to have been used elsewhere and certainly not historically."
Do you remember the days when we were allowed in pubs and used to meet people by actually physically talking.... And the lines...
"I'm sure I recognise you from somewhere?"
"do you come here often?"
Surely it's just the same thing? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yeah, I get the “can I ask you something a lot”, “I’ve seen you on Tinder” & one guy messaged to say he had seen someone using my photos on Tinder & yet had zero details about who it was beyond he swiped left,
Whatever dudes! |
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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago
Liverpool |
99.99% of the time it's just a line.
A few times though I'd swear I'd seen them somewhere before and just can't place it, especially if very local. Problem is you can't say it without it coming across as just a line |
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"I did actually have this conversation with someone just a few weeks ago and it was legitimate - I’d spoken to her on another app, which had a really good Feel(d) about it - and struck up a conversation here too.
I realise this is a minority statement "
I'm sure it does legitimately happen but as you can see from the responses, this does seem to be yet another branch of the bullshit tree that men climb on here. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I did actually have this conversation with someone just a few weeks ago and it was legitimate - I’d spoken to her on another app, which had a really good Feel(d) about it - and struck up a conversation here too.
I realise this is a minority statement
I'm sure it does legitimately happen but as you can see from the responses, this does seem to be yet another branch of the bullshit tree that men climb on here."
I want to marry you for your turn of phrase, if nothing else!
(Actually also your ass and thighs).
X
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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago
Maldon and Peterborough |
"On that note I’ve just received one …… jokingly of course
I’m sure when I used to know you I was in your age range  
Smooth talker.
He’s a good un
He's my hero.
Mine too "
Fiddles for Fab president. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"On that note I’ve just received one …… jokingly of course
I’m sure when I used to know you I was in your age range
Smooth talker.
He’s a good un
He's my hero.
Mine too
Fiddles for Fab president. "
He’s got my vote |
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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago
Maldon and Peterborough |
"On that note I’ve just received one …… jokingly of course
I’m sure when I used to know you I was in your age range
Smooth talker.
He’s a good un
He's my hero.
Mine too
Fiddles for Fab president.
He’s got my vote "
New thread idea. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"On that note I’ve just received one …… jokingly of course
I’m sure when I used to know you I was in your age range
Smooth talker.
He’s a good un
He's my hero.
Mine too
Fiddles for Fab president.
He’s got my vote
New thread idea. "
Do it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"On that note I’ve just received one …… jokingly of course
I’m sure when I used to know you I was in your age range
Smooth talker.
He’s a good un
He's my hero.
Mine too
Fiddles for Fab president.
He’s got my vote
New thread idea. "
Another popularity thread? We need more of those lol |
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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago
Maldon and Peterborough |
"On that note I’ve just received one …… jokingly of course
I’m sure when I used to know you I was in your age range
Smooth talker.
He’s a good un
He's my hero.
Mine too
Fiddles for Fab president.
He’s got my vote
New thread idea.
Another popularity thread? We need more of those lol"
You know me - it's a piss take to the popularity threads. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I seem to get loads of ‘Oh wow, it’s been ages! How are you doing??’ type messages but never from anyone I recognise so just assume they are trying a bit of a sneaky tactic to get a reply.. |
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By *ensiveMan
over a year ago
Lincoln area |
"In the last few days, I think I've had 4 or 5 men message saying something along the lines of recognising me from somewhere else and that we had spoken on there. 2 went on to claim that we had arranged to meet and the others were just I recognise your body/your photos.
Is this just a common ploy that's now being used to make you think rapport/connection has previously been established or worried that your photos are being used elsewhere?
The first time I had a message like that, I only had one public photo and it was brand new so highly unlikely to have been used elsewhere and certainly not historically."
Legends! I do need some new tactics. Cheers |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Yes, it is. It was discussed recently in the “men of fab” kik group and it was agreed we’d give it a go.
But wait to hear what we have in store for next month: it’s brilliant. Brand new strategy! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes, it is. It was discussed recently in the “men of fab” kik group and it was agreed we’d give it a go.
But wait to hear what we have in store for next month: it’s brilliant. Brand new strategy! "
This is actually a great idea. We should follow our female counterparts lead and setup a chat/group for men only, where we secretly (openly!) discuss all the relationships the women we are talking to are having with other men , whilst pretending in open forums to be “discreet” about our business.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yes, it is. It was discussed recently in the “men of fab” kik group and it was agreed we’d give it a go.
But wait to hear what we have in store for next month: it’s brilliant. Brand new strategy!
This is actually a great idea. We should follow our female counterparts lead and setup a chat/group for men only, where we secretly (openly!) discuss all the relationships the women we are talking to are having with other men , whilst pretending in open forums to be “discreet” about our business.
"
There is already such a group but we banned such discussions, it was getting too territorial.
Instead it’s more like a support group with a weekly.
Last week we taught each other how to take better cock pics.
This week we’re exchanging ideas on how to deal with rejection. It’s quite an animated debate. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yes, it is. It was discussed recently in the “men of fab” kik group and it was agreed we’d give it a go.
But wait to hear what we have in store for next month: it’s brilliant. Brand new strategy!
This is actually a great idea. We should follow our female counterparts lead and setup a chat/group for men only, where we secretly (openly!) discuss all the relationships the women we are talking to are having with other men , whilst pretending in open forums to be “discreet” about our business.
There is already such a group but we banned such discussions, it was getting too territorial.
Instead it’s more like a support group with a weekly.
Last week we taught each other how to take better cock pics.
This week we’re exchanging ideas on how to deal with rejection. It’s quite an animated debate."
*weekly theme of discussion |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yes, it is. It was discussed recently in the “men of fab” kik group and it was agreed we’d give it a go.
But wait to hear what we have in store for next month: it’s brilliant. Brand new strategy!
This is actually a great idea. We should follow our female counterparts lead and setup a chat/group for men only, where we secretly (openly!) discuss all the relationships the women we are talking to are having with other men , whilst pretending in open forums to be “discreet” about our business.
There is already such a group but we banned such discussions, it was getting too territorial.
Instead it’s more like a support group with a weekly.
Last week we taught each other how to take better cock pics.
This week we’re exchanging ideas on how to deal with rejection. It’s quite an animated debate."
Sign me up, I’ve plenty of tacit-rejection stories to share |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yes, it is. It was discussed recently in the “men of fab” kik group and it was agreed we’d give it a go.
But wait to hear what we have in store for next month: it’s brilliant. Brand new strategy!
This is actually a great idea. We should follow our female counterparts lead and setup a chat/group for men only, where we secretly (openly!) discuss all the relationships the women we are talking to are having with other men , whilst pretending in open forums to be “discreet” about our business.
There is already such a group but we banned such discussions, it was getting too territorial.
Instead it’s more like a support group with a weekly.
Last week we taught each other how to take better cock pics.
This week we’re exchanging ideas on how to deal with rejection. It’s quite an animated debate."
I'm in! 
*scratches bollocks and sniffs fingers* |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yes, it is. It was discussed recently in the “men of fab” kik group and it was agreed we’d give it a go.
But wait to hear what we have in store for next month: it’s brilliant. Brand new strategy!
This is actually a great idea. We should follow our female counterparts lead and setup a chat/group for men only, where we secretly (openly!) discuss all the relationships the women we are talking to are having with other men , whilst pretending in open forums to be “discreet” about our business.
There is already such a group but we banned such discussions, it was getting too territorial.
Instead it’s more like a support group with a weekly.
Last week we taught each other how to take better cock pics.
This week we’re exchanging ideas on how to deal with rejection. It’s quite an animated debate.
I'm in!
*scratches bollocks and sniffs fingers*"
Gross. Just gross. (You’re in) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yes, it is. It was discussed recently in the “men of fab” kik group and it was agreed we’d give it a go.
But wait to hear what we have in store for next month: it’s brilliant. Brand new strategy!
This is actually a great idea. We should follow our female counterparts lead and setup a chat/group for men only, where we secretly (openly!) discuss all the relationships the women we are talking to are having with other men , whilst pretending in open forums to be “discreet” about our business.
There is already such a group but we banned such discussions, it was getting too territorial.
Instead it’s more like a support group with a weekly.
Last week we taught each other how to take better cock pics.
This week we’re exchanging ideas on how to deal with rejection. It’s quite an animated debate.
Sign me up, I’ve plenty of tacit-rejection stories to share "
You need to be recommended by 3 existing members. You have mine but need to find 2 more by yourself: we’re not allowed to name other members. |
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Getting someone’s attention by the back door. My friend had one. Along the lines of, “well thanks very much for standing me up”
Now, how she had managed that when she had no idea who this guy was?
Anyway, it was enough to start a conversation to clear her name. |
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Yes I’ve had a few, in which I’m supposed to have played with them previously in saunas or clubs. Although I have been to those venues I’m fully aware of who I’ve interacted with and who I haven’t. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yes, it is. It was discussed recently in the “men of fab” kik group and it was agreed we’d give it a go.
But wait to hear what we have in store for next month: it’s brilliant. Brand new strategy!
This is actually a great idea. We should follow our female counterparts lead and setup a chat/group for men only, where we secretly (openly!) discuss all the relationships the women we are talking to are having with other men , whilst pretending in open forums to be “discreet” about our business.
There is already such a group but we banned such discussions, it was getting too territorial.
Instead it’s more like a support group with a weekly.
Last week we taught each other how to take better cock pics.
This week we’re exchanging ideas on how to deal with rejection. It’s quite an animated debate.
I'm in!
*scratches bollocks and sniffs fingers*
Gross. Just gross. (You’re in) "
Woohoooooooo!
Oops typo. Yeah bro. *slight head nod* |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It’s been used on me, that’s how widespread it is now.
Yeah sorry about that  "
You can pretend to know things about me if you want, I’ll just agree and say yep that’s him! |
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"It’s been used on me, that’s how widespread it is now.
Yeah sorry about that
You can pretend to know things about me if you want, I’ll just agree and say yep that’s him! "
well it’s lovely to chat to you again Dave |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Yep... Had 1 guy tell me we had fucked in his first message... Do you remember me in his 2nd the 3 more like he hadn't sent the first ones and it was his first contact with me... He is now blocked |
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» Add a new message to this topic
some of them even mention a name then I know it’s lies 
