FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Someone please come stroke me

Someone please come stroke me

By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

I'm curled around a hot water bottle with a combination of Mother Nature kicking me in the clunge and residual abdominal pain from surgery a couple of weeks ago.

I need someone to come here, make me sweet, strong tea, stroke my hair and tell me I'm pretty.

(The last part is optional and I won't believe you anyway)

I have air con if that helps sway anyone?

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By *aughty_Smooth_OperatorMan over a year ago

Birmingham

"I'm curled around a hot water bottle with a combination of Mother Nature kicking me in the clunge and residual abdominal pain from surgery a couple of weeks ago.

I need someone to come here, make me sweet, strong tea, stroke my hair and tell me I'm pretty.

(The last part is optional and I won't believe you anyway)

I have air con if that helps sway anyone?

That would be an absolute pleasure

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I'm curled around a hot water bottle with a combination of Mother Nature kicking me in the clunge and residual abdominal pain from surgery a couple of weeks ago.

I need someone to come here, make me sweet, strong tea, stroke my hair and tell me I'm pretty.

(The last part is optional and I won't believe you anyway)

I have air con if that helps sway anyone?

That would be an absolute pleasure

It's the air con that convinced you isn't it.....

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By *aughty_Smooth_OperatorMan over a year ago

Birmingham

"I'm curled around a hot water bottle with a combination of Mother Nature kicking me in the clunge and residual abdominal pain from surgery a couple of weeks ago.

I need someone to come here, make me sweet, strong tea, stroke my hair and tell me I'm pretty.

(The last part is optional and I won't believe you anyway)

I have air con if that helps sway anyone?

That would be an absolute pleasure

It's the air con that convinced you isn't it....."

Nope its your cheeky smile

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

I should have added this to the OP.....

This is an attention seeking post. I don't want anyone thinking it might not be.

Although is all true as well.

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By *naswingdressWoman over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I'd love to

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I'm curled around a hot water bottle with a combination of Mother Nature kicking me in the clunge and residual abdominal pain from surgery a couple of weeks ago.

I need someone to come here, make me sweet, strong tea, stroke my hair and tell me I'm pretty.

(The last part is optional and I won't believe you anyway)

I have air con if that helps sway anyone?

That would be an absolute pleasure

It's the air con that convinced you isn't it.....

Nope its your cheeky smile

Awwwwww fanks

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By *uke olovingmanMan over a year ago

Gravesend

I'm saddling up my white charger as we speak

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By *ogueAngelMan over a year ago

Near Bath / Bristol

Is being kicked in the clunge contagious? I'm not sure I want to catch it...

I hope you feel better soon though. X

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I'd love to

How's your tea making?

And will you sing soft kitty to me?

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By *aughty_Smooth_OperatorMan over a year ago

Birmingham

"I'm curled around a hot water bottle with a combination of Mother Nature kicking me in the clunge and residual abdominal pain from surgery a couple of weeks ago.

I need someone to come here, make me sweet, strong tea, stroke my hair and tell me I'm pretty.

(The last part is optional and I won't believe you anyway)

I have air con if that helps sway anyone?

That would be an absolute pleasure

It's the air con that convinced you isn't it.....

Nope its your cheeky smile

Awwwwww fanks"

I can also give you a nice massage to

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I'm saddling up my white charger as we speak

Awesome. I'll see you in a few days then!

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By *gent CoulsonMan over a year ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

If I were closer posh I would be there like a shot, I would even bring one of my nice throws to let you snuggle into

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Is being kicked in the clunge contagious? I'm not sure I want to catch it...

I hope you feel better soon though. X"

Nah. It's that delightful thing that occurs approximately every 28 days for most women and makes us want to reach in and rip out our uteruses.

I think men are largely unaffected by it.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I'm curled around a hot water bottle with a combination of Mother Nature kicking me in the clunge and residual abdominal pain from surgery a couple of weeks ago.

I need someone to come here, make me sweet, strong tea, stroke my hair and tell me I'm pretty.

(The last part is optional and I won't believe you anyway)

I have air con if that helps sway anyone?

That would be an absolute pleasure

It's the air con that convinced you isn't it.....

Nope its your cheeky smile

Awwwwww fanks

I can also give you a nice massage to

I should probably warn you..... touch any part of me from the waist to the thigh and I may tear your arm off and beat you with it.

But that's so lovely.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"If I were closer posh I would be there like a shot, I would even bring one of my nice throws to let you snuggle into"

And this is why air con is useful..... you can snuggle warmly and still remain cool

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By *ogueAngelMan over a year ago

Near Bath / Bristol

"Is being kicked in the clunge contagious? I'm not sure I want to catch it...

I hope you feel better soon though. X

Nah. It's that delightful thing that occurs approximately every 28 days for most women and makes us want to reach in and rip out our uteruses.

I think men are largely unaffected by it."

Phew. Whilst not contagious am I at risk of any adverse side effects?

I'm. Sure the adverse effects of a ripped out uterus may be worse, but you can do this! X

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Is being kicked in the clunge contagious? I'm not sure I want to catch it...

I hope you feel better soon though. X

Nah. It's that delightful thing that occurs approximately every 28 days for most women and makes us want to reach in and rip out our uteruses.

I think men are largely unaffected by it.

Phew. Whilst not contagious am I at risk of any adverse side effects?

I'm. Sure the adverse effects of a ripped out uterus may be worse, but you can do this! X"

Providing you don't say or do anything even remotely irritating (parameters for this are subject to change without warning), you risk nothing. Because I'm a delight

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Sending huge hugs to you all the way from the North. Sorry to hear you have pains, I'll make you a poultice and send it down.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Sending huge hugs to you all the way from the North. Sorry to hear you have pains, I'll make you a poultice and send it down.

You, lovely lady, are the very essence of your username.

No lavender though please, it gives me a headache

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By *ogueAngelMan over a year ago

Near Bath / Bristol

"Is being kicked in the clunge contagious? I'm not sure I want to catch it...

I hope you feel better soon though. X

Nah. It's that delightful thing that occurs approximately every 28 days for most women and makes us want to reach in and rip out our uteruses.

I think men are largely unaffected by it.

Phew. Whilst not contagious am I at risk of any adverse side effects?

I'm. Sure the adverse effects of a ripped out uterus may be worse, but you can do this! X

Providing you don't say or do anything even remotely irritating (parameters for this are subject to change without warning), you risk nothing. Because I'm a delight

I think that rules out me saying or doing anything then.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Is being kicked in the clunge contagious? I'm not sure I want to catch it...

I hope you feel better soon though. X

Nah. It's that delightful thing that occurs approximately every 28 days for most women and makes us want to reach in and rip out our uteruses.

I think men are largely unaffected by it.

Phew. Whilst not contagious am I at risk of any adverse side effects?

I'm. Sure the adverse effects of a ripped out uterus may be worse, but you can do this! X

Providing you don't say or do anything even remotely irritating (parameters for this are subject to change without warning), you risk nothing. Because I'm a delight

I think that rules out me saying or doing anything then.

You may come sit here and look pretty while stroking my hair.

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By *rAitchMan over a year ago

Diagonally Parked in a Parallel Universe

"Is being kicked in the clunge contagious? I'm not sure I want to catch it...

I hope you feel better soon though. X

Nah. It's that delightful thing that occurs approximately every 28 days for most women and makes us want to reach in and rip out our uteruses.

I think men are largely unaffected by it."

I was hugely affected by it for almost 30 years. The ex-wife saw to it that I suffered when she did!

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By *naswingdressWoman over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"I'd love to

How's your tea making?

And will you sing soft kitty to me?"

It's pretty good, and I can sing

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Is being kicked in the clunge contagious? I'm not sure I want to catch it...

I hope you feel better soon though. X

Nah. It's that delightful thing that occurs approximately every 28 days for most women and makes us want to reach in and rip out our uteruses.

I think men are largely unaffected by it.

I was hugely affected by it for almost 30 years. The ex-wife saw to it that I suffered when she did!

You were one of the lucky ones that was permitted to experience the holy grail then....

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I'd love to

How's your tea making?

And will you sing soft kitty to me?

It's pretty good, and I can sing

Awesome. Door is on the latch.

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By *uxom redCouple over a year ago

Shrewsbury

Shall I get Dick to stroke your hair and I'll give you big boobie cuddles.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Shall I get Dick to stroke your hair and I'll give you big boobie cuddles. "

Yes please. Will you bring tea? Please

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By *uxom redCouple over a year ago

Shrewsbury

"Shall I get Dick to stroke your hair and I'll give you big boobie cuddles.

Yes please. Will you bring tea? Please

What type of tea, I've loads of different herbal teas.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Shall I get Dick to stroke your hair and I'll give you big boobie cuddles.

Yes please. Will you bring tea? Please

What type of tea, I've loads of different herbal teas. "

Oh just boring English Breakfast please. Quite strong and sweet. It's a proper cure all

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By *atnip make me purrWoman over a year ago

Reading

Soft kitty,

Warm kitty

Little ball of fur.

Soft kitty,

Warm kitty

Purr purr purr.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Soft kitty,

Warm kitty

Little ball of fur.

Soft kitty,

Warm kitty

Purr purr purr.

There it is!! Thank you. That was a fine rendition.

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By *ikeC81Man over a year ago

harrow

I will stroke you if you stroke me

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I will stroke you if you stroke me

If you poke me I'll be pissed off though.....

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By *ogueAngelMan over a year ago

Near Bath / Bristol

"Is being kicked in the clunge contagious? I'm not sure I want to catch it...

I hope you feel better soon though. X

Nah. It's that delightful thing that occurs approximately every 28 days for most women and makes us want to reach in and rip out our uteruses.

I think men are largely unaffected by it.

Phew. Whilst not contagious am I at risk of any adverse side effects?

I'm. Sure the adverse effects of a ripped out uterus may be worse, but you can do this! X

Providing you don't say or do anything even remotely irritating (parameters for this are subject to change without warning), you risk nothing. Because I'm a delight

I think that rules out me saying or doing anything then.

You may come sit here and look pretty while stroking my hair."

Can I stroke with a 2m stick? Still worries I might catch clunge kick...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Come here, lay your head in my lap and I’ll stroke your hair

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

On my way

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm curled around a hot water bottle with a combination of Mother Nature kicking me in the clunge and residual abdominal pain from surgery a couple of weeks ago.

I need someone to come here, make me sweet, strong tea, stroke my hair and tell me I'm pretty.

(The last part is optional and I won't believe you anyway)

I have air con if that helps sway anyone?

Shame I’m far away as I would love to do that right now! Sending it virtually to you

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Is being kicked in the clunge contagious? I'm not sure I want to catch it...

I hope you feel better soon though. X

Nah. It's that delightful thing that occurs approximately every 28 days for most women and makes us want to reach in and rip out our uteruses.

I think men are largely unaffected by it.

Phew. Whilst not contagious am I at risk of any adverse side effects?

I'm. Sure the adverse effects of a ripped out uterus may be worse, but you can do this! X

Providing you don't say or do anything even remotely irritating (parameters for this are subject to change without warning), you risk nothing. Because I'm a delight

I think that rules out me saying or doing anything then.

You may come sit here and look pretty while stroking my hair.

Can I stroke with a 2m stick? Still worries I might catch clunge kick..."

You may.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Come here, lay your head in my lap and I’ll stroke your hair

But I can't move!

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"On my way

Knew I could rely on you

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I'm curled around a hot water bottle with a combination of Mother Nature kicking me in the clunge and residual abdominal pain from surgery a couple of weeks ago.

I need someone to come here, make me sweet, strong tea, stroke my hair and tell me I'm pretty.

(The last part is optional and I won't believe you anyway)

I have air con if that helps sway anyone?

Shame I’m far away as I would love to do that right now! Sending it virtually to you"

Virtual stroking?

Don't they offer that in the chat rooms?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm curled around a hot water bottle with a combination of Mother Nature kicking me in the clunge and residual abdominal pain from surgery a couple of weeks ago.

I need someone to come here, make me sweet, strong tea, stroke my hair and tell me I'm pretty.

(The last part is optional and I won't believe you anyway)

I have air con if that helps sway anyone?

Shame I’m far away as I would love to do that right now! Sending it virtually to you

Virtual stroking?

Don't they offer that in the chat rooms?

I wish I could reach through the screen right now and stroke you make you feel better

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I'm curled around a hot water bottle with a combination of Mother Nature kicking me in the clunge and residual abdominal pain from surgery a couple of weeks ago.

I need someone to come here, make me sweet, strong tea, stroke my hair and tell me I'm pretty.

(The last part is optional and I won't believe you anyway)

I have air con if that helps sway anyone?

Shame I’m far away as I would love to do that right now! Sending it virtually to you

Virtual stroking?

Don't they offer that in the chat rooms?

I wish I could reach through the screen right now and stroke you make you feel better "

Aww thanks

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By *ogueAngelMan over a year ago

Near Bath / Bristol

"Is being kicked in the clunge contagious? I'm not sure I want to catch it...

I hope you feel better soon though. X

Nah. It's that delightful thing that occurs approximately every 28 days for most women and makes us want to reach in and rip out our uteruses.

I think men are largely unaffected by it.

Phew. Whilst not contagious am I at risk of any adverse side effects?

I'm. Sure the adverse effects of a ripped out uterus may be worse, but you can do this! X

Providing you don't say or do anything even remotely irritating (parameters for this are subject to change without warning), you risk nothing. Because I'm a delight

I think that rules out me saying or doing anything then.

You may come sit here and look pretty while stroking my hair.

Can I stroke with a 2m stick? Still worries I might catch clunge kick...

You may."

Awesome. I've put a brush on the end, and incorporated a chocolate dispenser too.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Is being kicked in the clunge contagious? I'm not sure I want to catch it...

I hope you feel better soon though. X

Nah. It's that delightful thing that occurs approximately every 28 days for most women and makes us want to reach in and rip out our uteruses.

I think men are largely unaffected by it.

Phew. Whilst not contagious am I at risk of any adverse side effects?

I'm. Sure the adverse effects of a ripped out uterus may be worse, but you can do this! X

Providing you don't say or do anything even remotely irritating (parameters for this are subject to change without warning), you risk nothing. Because I'm a delight

I think that rules out me saying or doing anything then.

You may come sit here and look pretty while stroking my hair.

Can I stroke with a 2m stick? Still worries I might catch clunge kick...

You may.

Awesome. I've put a brush on the end, and incorporated a chocolate dispenser too. "

You're a genius. And can clearly do no wrong!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm curled around a hot water bottle with a combination of Mother Nature kicking me in the clunge and residual abdominal pain from surgery a couple of weeks ago.

I need someone to come here, make me sweet, strong tea, stroke my hair and tell me I'm pretty.

(The last part is optional and I won't believe you anyway)

I have air con if that helps sway anyone?

Shame I’m far away as I would love to do that right now! Sending it virtually to you

Virtual stroking?

Don't they offer that in the chat rooms?

I wish I could reach through the screen right now and stroke you make you feel better

Aww thanks

That’s ok, a bit of tlc always makes it better…I’ll even do my naked chef routine

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I'm curled around a hot water bottle with a combination of Mother Nature kicking me in the clunge and residual abdominal pain from surgery a couple of weeks ago.

I need someone to come here, make me sweet, strong tea, stroke my hair and tell me I'm pretty.

(The last part is optional and I won't believe you anyway)

I have air con if that helps sway anyone?

Shame I’m far away as I would love to do that right now! Sending it virtually to you

Virtual stroking?

Don't they offer that in the chat rooms?

I wish I could reach through the screen right now and stroke you make you feel better

Aww thanks

That’s ok, a bit of tlc always makes it better…I’ll even do my naked chef routine"

As long as there is tea.....

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By *irtydevil666Man over a year ago

bristol

Makes note she has Air Con....

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By *ogueAngelMan over a year ago

Near Bath / Bristol

"Is being kicked in the clunge contagious? I'm not sure I want to catch it...

I hope you feel better soon though. X

Nah. It's that delightful thing that occurs approximately every 28 days for most women and makes us want to reach in and rip out our uteruses.

I think men are largely unaffected by it.

Phew. Whilst not contagious am I at risk of any adverse side effects?

I'm. Sure the adverse effects of a ripped out uterus may be worse, but you can do this! X

Providing you don't say or do anything even remotely irritating (parameters for this are subject to change without warning), you risk nothing. Because I'm a delight

I think that rules out me saying or doing anything then.

You may come sit here and look pretty while stroking my hair.

Can I stroke with a 2m stick? Still worries I might catch clunge kick...

You may.

Awesome. I've put a brush on the end, and incorporated a chocolate dispenser too.

You're a genius. And can clearly do no wrong!"

Well, I didn't wanna say it

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm curled around a hot water bottle with a combination of Mother Nature kicking me in the clunge and residual abdominal pain from surgery a couple of weeks ago.

I need someone to come here, make me sweet, strong tea, stroke my hair and tell me I'm pretty.

(The last part is optional and I won't believe you anyway)

I have air con if that helps sway anyone?

Shame I’m far away as I would love to do that right now! Sending it virtually to you

Virtual stroking?

Don't they offer that in the chat rooms?

I wish I could reach through the screen right now and stroke you make you feel better

Aww thanks

That’s ok, a bit of tlc always makes it better…I’ll even do my naked chef routine

As long as there is tea....."

How do you take your tea?

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By *andycandy88Woman over a year ago

Northolt

Awwww nooo

I hate that time of the month sorry to hear poshy posh

wishing the days fly by so it's over with for you

xxxmwah

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By *reya73Woman over a year ago

Whitley Bay

Awww strokey, softly, singy soft slightly sad stuff with the guitar, tea and then a brandy or two to get the cheeks rosy again and raise a giggle or two.

There

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Makes note she has Air Con....

I knew you'd spot that

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Is being kicked in the clunge contagious? I'm not sure I want to catch it...

I hope you feel better soon though. X

Nah. It's that delightful thing that occurs approximately every 28 days for most women and makes us want to reach in and rip out our uteruses.

I think men are largely unaffected by it.

Phew. Whilst not contagious am I at risk of any adverse side effects?

I'm. Sure the adverse effects of a ripped out uterus may be worse, but you can do this! X

Providing you don't say or do anything even remotely irritating (parameters for this are subject to change without warning), you risk nothing. Because I'm a delight

I think that rules out me saying or doing anything then.

You may come sit here and look pretty while stroking my hair.

Can I stroke with a 2m stick? Still worries I might catch clunge kick...

You may.

Awesome. I've put a brush on the end, and incorporated a chocolate dispenser too.

You're a genius. And can clearly do no wrong!

Well, I didn't wanna say it

You are hereby at no risk of any adverse effects and may say or do anything. Because you're bringing chocolate.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I'm curled around a hot water bottle with a combination of Mother Nature kicking me in the clunge and residual abdominal pain from surgery a couple of weeks ago.

I need someone to come here, make me sweet, strong tea, stroke my hair and tell me I'm pretty.

(The last part is optional and I won't believe you anyway)

I have air con if that helps sway anyone?

Shame I’m far away as I would love to do that right now! Sending it virtually to you

Virtual stroking?

Don't they offer that in the chat rooms?

I wish I could reach through the screen right now and stroke you make you feel better

Aww thanks

That’s ok, a bit of tlc always makes it better…I’ll even do my naked chef routine

As long as there is tea.....

How do you take your tea? "

Hot, strongish and sweet.

Like my men

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Awwww nooo

I hate that time of the month sorry to hear poshy posh

wishing the days fly by so it's over with for you

xxxmwah"

Thanks Candy. It's always horrible but I'm not quite recovered from having tubes wedged in there so it's horrendous

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Awww strokey, softly, singy soft slightly sad stuff with the guitar, tea and then a brandy or two to get the cheeks rosy again and raise a giggle or two.

There "

That made me giggle..... best medicine. Thanks Freya xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Come here, lay your head in my lap and I’ll stroke your hair

But I can't move!"

Good point, I’m in the car right now, on my way

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Awww I'll stroke your brow poshy and bring you some bubbles

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By *ooBulMan over a year ago

Missin’ Yo’ Kissin’

As I used to be Lactose-Intolerant - not a big fan of milk.

So... Instead I would put Nestles milk in your tea. Three sugars and make it very stong... Proper workman's tea! Strong 'n' sweet (I'm not even a workman.)

If you don't accept the "pretty" bit - how about you are a cracking bnit of stuff?

Or is that a score of 2 out of 3 forks

in my forehead & I don't win Dusty Bin either?

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By *ogueAngelMan over a year ago

Near Bath / Bristol

"Is being kicked in the clunge contagious? I'm not sure I want to catch it...

I hope you feel better soon though. X

Nah. It's that delightful thing that occurs approximately every 28 days for most women and makes us want to reach in and rip out our uteruses.

I think men are largely unaffected by it.

Phew. Whilst not contagious am I at risk of any adverse side effects?

I'm. Sure the adverse effects of a ripped out uterus may be worse, but you can do this! X

Providing you don't say or do anything even remotely irritating (parameters for this are subject to change without warning), you risk nothing. Because I'm a delight

I think that rules out me saying or doing anything then.

You may come sit here and look pretty while stroking my hair.

Can I stroke with a 2m stick? Still worries I might catch clunge kick...

You may.

Awesome. I've put a brush on the end, and incorporated a chocolate dispenser too.

You're a genius. And can clearly do no wrong!

Well, I didn't wanna say it

You are hereby at no risk of any adverse effects and may say or do anything. Because you're bringing chocolate."

Chocolate, the hidden language of winning. What's your favourite?

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Come here, lay your head in my lap and I’ll stroke your hair

But I can't move!

Good point, I’m in the car right now, on my way

Yay! Thank you

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Awww I'll stroke your brow poshy and bring you some bubbles

Knew I could count on you too

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By *atnip make me purrWoman over a year ago

Reading

"Soft kitty,

Warm kitty

Little ball of fur.

Soft kitty,

Warm kitty

Purr purr purr.

There it is!! Thank you. That was a fine rendition."

I hope it helped

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By *andycandy88Woman over a year ago

Northolt

"Awwww nooo

I hate that time of the month sorry to hear poshy posh

wishing the days fly by so it's over with for you

xxxmwah

Thanks Candy. It's always horrible but I'm not quite recovered from having tubes wedged in there so it's horrendous

oh dear

sorry to hear poshy posh

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By *eyond PurityCouple over a year ago

Lincolnshire

Aww big hugs sweetie. I'm here with a massive bar of Dairy Milk, if that helps

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"As I used to be Lactose-Intolerant - not a big fan of milk.

So... Instead I would put Nestles milk in your tea. Three sugars and make it very stong... Proper workman's tea! Strong 'n' sweet (I'm not even a workman.)

If you don't accept the "pretty" bit - how about you are a cracking bnit of stuff?

Or is that a score of 2 out of 3 forks

in my forehead & I don't win Dusty Bin either?

That's basically perfect!

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Is being kicked in the clunge contagious? I'm not sure I want to catch it...

I hope you feel better soon though. X

Nah. It's that delightful thing that occurs approximately every 28 days for most women and makes us want to reach in and rip out our uteruses.

I think men are largely unaffected by it.

Phew. Whilst not contagious am I at risk of any adverse side effects?

I'm. Sure the adverse effects of a ripped out uterus may be worse, but you can do this! X

Providing you don't say or do anything even remotely irritating (parameters for this are subject to change without warning), you risk nothing. Because I'm a delight

I think that rules out me saying or doing anything then.

You may come sit here and look pretty while stroking my hair.

Can I stroke with a 2m stick? Still worries I might catch clunge kick...

You may.

Awesome. I've put a brush on the end, and incorporated a chocolate dispenser too.

You're a genius. And can clearly do no wrong!

Well, I didn't wanna say it

You are hereby at no risk of any adverse effects and may say or do anything. Because you're bringing chocolate.

Chocolate, the hidden language of winning. What's your favourite?"

I'm cheap and easy. Dairy Milk works.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Soft kitty,

Warm kitty

Little ball of fur.

Soft kitty,

Warm kitty

Purr purr purr.

There it is!! Thank you. That was a fine rendition.

I hope it helped"

It did

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Awwww nooo

I hate that time of the month sorry to hear poshy posh

wishing the days fly by so it's over with for you

xxxmwah

Thanks Candy. It's always horrible but I'm not quite recovered from having tubes wedged in there so it's horrendous

oh dear

sorry to hear poshy posh

xx "

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Aww big hugs sweetie. I'm here with a massive bar of Dairy Milk, if that helps

C "

Yes please C..... thank you!

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By *ikeC81Man over a year ago

harrow

"I will stroke you if you stroke me

If you poke me I'll be pissed off though....."

That’s ok no poking

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