Talking to a Lady we seem to be getting on, but she wont meet me just for a coffee, to meet the real me because i am submissive.
I have explained if I was a stick of rock it would say submissive right through it. I kind of think she wants me to, after 40 years become a vanilla man, but I cant. Any tips on how to explain this would be apreciated please. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would just very clearly tell her that being a submissive is a big part of who you are, and not one that you're willing or able to give up. Then let her know that if she doesn't want that, then you aren't the right fit for her. |
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"Talking to a Lady we seem to be getting on, but she wont meet me just for a coffee, to meet the real me because i am submissive.
I have explained if I was a stick of rock it would say submissive right through it. I kind of think she wants me to, after 40 years become a vanilla man, but I cant. Any tips on how to explain this would be apreciated please. "
Sounds like she wants you to be something that you're not...? If she wanted you to have a 3rd leg or blue eyes or a foot long sausage would you.? Its a stranger you've never met. Imagine if you said to her... "I'm not meeting unless you show up as mistress cruella deville in Costa coffee." |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think you already know the answer. If she can't accept you for all of you then it's not going to work. Like you said, It's right through you, it is you, anybody who can't see and accept that isn't compatible. |
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I don't understand what there is to explain. You say you're submissive through and through and it isn't going to change. She doesn't want to meet because you are submissive. Isn't that the end of the discussion? If you both wish to continue chatting online only is up to you both but in terms of meeting people it's obvious you both need to look elsewhere. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There is so much more awaiting for you. You don't need to become anyone else to feel accepted and valued. And it's horrible when people try to mould you into something you are not for their own pleasure. Head high and say bye.  |
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"Talking to a Lady we seem to be getting on, but she wont meet me just for a coffee, to meet the real me because i am submissive.
I have explained if I was a stick of rock it would say submissive right through it. I kind of think she wants me to, after 40 years become a vanilla man, but I cant. Any tips on how to explain this would be apreciated please. "
What makes you "kind of think" she wants you to change?
Why do you want her to change? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Talking to a Lady we seem to be getting on, but she wont meet me just for a coffee, to meet the real me because i am submissive.
I have explained if I was a stick of rock it would say submissive right through it. I kind of think she wants me to, after 40 years become a vanilla man, but I cant. Any tips on how to explain this would be apreciated please. "
You’re not a match - just move on. |
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On a nilla level we are very compatable, but any type of kink chat "FROZEN" and ignored, I certainly would never ask or do anything she did not want, but i think its time i moved on we are clearly on diffrent planes. Thank you to all for your comments... |
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at least you know that before you do meet and aren’t wasting your time and effort.