FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > I know I’ve been a pain
I know I’ve been a pain
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Hello everyone, hope you are all having a good evening, I’ve come to the decision that I have been a pain, what I mean is that I feel like I have pissed off so many people on this website, and I just want to apologise, I’m hoping to make a clean slate, hope all of you can forgive. You don’t have to forget just forgive only if you want to |
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I've seen a couple of your posts and I've not seen anything you have done to piss anyone off.
You just seem to be being overly negative and hard on your self.
No forgiveness needed from here.
I hope you can find happiness and the fun of FAB. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I haven’t seen your posts, I’m afraid, hence you haven’t offended me.
It’s nice you want to make a clean slate. Come and join in, have fun and do not take things seriously around here. It’s what makes it fun.
You can always rant and vent in the relevant threads when you feel the need.  |
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You haven't pissed us off. We're happy to have a clean slate. I do think that you express yourself in negative terms - just take a look at your user name! I don't think it's about upsetting anybody. I think it's more about people not quite knowing how to react. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You haven't pissed me off at all.
As others have said you do seem a little negative and not an issue unless its affecting you.
Keep posting and maybe if you wanted to try and be more light hearted then post on lots of different types of threads. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I didn’t reply to the last few threads is because I didn’t know how to use it at the time of me making my post......"
Yay you're back. Join in. There's some lovely people on the forums. X |
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That’s the thing I’m scared to vent because I know if I do people are going to have an “opinion” and think they know everything I am going through, even though I have probably vented about one thing |
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"Hello everyone, hope you are all having a good evening, I’ve come to the decision that I have been a pain, what I mean is that I feel like I have pissed off so many people on this website, and I just want to apologise, I’m hoping to make a clean slate, hope all of you can forgive. You don’t have to forget just forgive only if you want to "
I’ve not been pissed off or offended by anything you’ve said. However, I forgive you for whatever you think you you’ve done x  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I didn’t reply to the last few threads is because I didn’t know how to use it at the time of me making my post......"
The forum is a good place to air your thoughts. As long as it's within forum rules then post/comment whatever pops into your head |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"That’s the thing I’m scared to vent because I know if I do people are going to have an “opinion” and think they know everything I am going through, even though I have probably vented about one thing "
If you use Reply + Quote button we know which post you are replying to.
The forums are a varied bunch of people with different opinions and experiences. Some may disagree with things said, but that's their opinion.
Some people may be able to help with thoughts that you'd never considered and help you sort things out. Hope that makes sense.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"That’s the thing I’m scared to vent because I know if I do people are going to have an “opinion” and think they know everything I am going through, even though I have probably vented about one thing "
If you need to vent privately you can always PM me and I won't offer opinion or advice. It has helped me to vent to someone in PMs. |
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"That’s the thing I’m scared to vent because I know if I do people are going to have an “opinion” and think they know everything I am going through, even though I have probably vented about one thing "
Why do you need to vent? |
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I understand that, but let’s say for example I vent about “some” people on the site.
Like I don’t say no names nothing just a little vent,
I feel like then everyone gangs up on me.
I’m not a negative person I try and think positively but when you have been mugged off once too many times you then just “give up”
And honestly that’s me right now
Sorry for the long response |
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"I understand that...... but even if I put everything and anything on my profile and had a different username I still feel like I would piss someone off. Honestly all I want is fun"
Perhaps some of the drugs have made you paranoid , honestly I would just go with the flow, from what I can see most people are happy to forgive xx perhaps rethink your user name , said with love and kindness xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I understand that, but let’s say for example I vent about “some” people on the site.
Like I don’t say no names nothing just a little vent,
I feel like then everyone gangs up on me.
I’m not a negative person I try and think positively but when you have been mugged off once too many times you then just “give up”
And honestly that’s me right now
Sorry for the long response "
When you post on the forum you'll get a multitude of responses. Eye-rolling, sarcastic, jokey and helpful. Just concentrate on the helpful replies and skip the others.
If you feel a post is personnally attacking you or your not up to joining in with a joke then report it to the moderators and they will deal with it. |
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"I’m not on drugs.......
My username may lead you to believe that but I’m as clean a a whistle, and don’t you think that’s what I’m doing going with the flow....... "
As I stated all said with love and kindness just trying to help x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I understand that, but let’s say for example I vent about “some” people on the site.
Like I don’t say no names nothing just a little vent,
I feel like then everyone gangs up on me.
I’m not a negative person I try and think positively but when you have been mugged off once too many times you then just “give up”
And honestly that’s me right now
Sorry for the long response "
Do you mean you posted stuff via this profile or an old one?
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Honestly it’s not even that..... it’s the fact that if I say my opinion or let’s say for example my last forum post I didn’t even check it till yesterday and I had loads of people criticise and shit on my profile, I can’t even remember what I wrote on my profile at the time, but what I do know is that I didn’t want to write my true feelings on the forum so I just let all my feelings out on my profile.....
And got hated on honestly I’m just going to unhid my profile and ask for peoples honest opinion |
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"I understand that, but let’s say for example I vent about “some” people on the site.
Like I don’t say no names nothing just a little vent,
I feel like then everyone gangs up on me.
I’m not a negative person I try and think positively but when you have been mugged off once too many times you then just “give up”
And honestly that’s me right now
Sorry for the long response "
Its is far worse being a man and doing the same.
Many use that block button because of what you say on the forums.
Just as much as a member you can be ignored.
Just make the forums what you want it to be of coarse you will get many that disagree. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Like what??? Gone on pick me a new username "
KinkyToyLover
SomersetSexy
MissTattooedTummy
BalaclavedBabe
Just pick something from your profile that is a good representation of you? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Like what??? Gone on pick me a new username
KinkyToyLover
SomersetSexy
MissTattooedTummy
BalaclavedBabe
Just pick something from your profile that is a good representation of you? "
Excellent suggestions  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hello everyone, hope you are all having a good evening, I’ve come to the decision that I have been a pain, what I mean is that I feel like I have pissed off so many people on this website, and I just want to apologise, I’m hoping to make a clean slate, hope all of you can forgive. You don’t have to forget just forgive only if you want to "
I've not seen anything that would have pissed anyone off.
I feel the same quite often if it's any consolation. |
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"Via this profile, one thread I made literally got told my profile is shit..."
The thread asking why people get ignored? I think people were trying to help to be honest and give reasons why they would ignore messages of you sent them one. You invited that in all honesty.
You are never going to please everybody and reading your comments on here it sounds like there are bigger problems than being ignored on a swingers site.
People vent on here all the time (me included) but if you do that you have to expect negative responses. If you are not strong enough to deal with that then yeah, I guess it is best not to do it. |
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Okay I can deal with negative responses I can deal with harsh comments I can deal with criticism but what I can’t deal with is hate like say example i’m asking help to improve my profile or let’s say for example I want help with my account I would then get three or four good comments helping then I would get the rude comments
I will be honest with you my username should not be an issue to anybody because far as I’m concerned none of you read it anyway you end up asking for my name when we meet or when we are messaging or when you answer me for my phone number |
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I'd have to agree with everything Evie says above.
I gave advice on your other thread then went to PM you to offer support (as I thought you may be having mental health issues) and you had blocked me.
If you ARE a real person - and not a troll like some have suggested - I think you may need to rethink posting on a public forum
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" Okay I can deal with negative responses I can deal with harsh comments I can deal with criticism but what I can’t deal with is hate like say example i’m asking help to improve my profile or let’s say for example I want help with my account I would then get three or four good comments helping then I would get the rude comments
I will be honest with you my username should not be an issue to anybody because far as I’m concerned none of you read it anyway you end up asking for my name when we meet or when we are messaging or when you answer me for my phone number "
Outright rude comments etc just show more about the people that write them than you do you. Report them if they are that rude.
While people will want to move conversation along when messaging, the first impression they get of you is your username and profile. How would you respond to a couples profile with a name of bigfatslobs? |
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Do you know how I can remove my thread as all of you are correct I believe all of you know what’s best for me so after today I am going to be removing myself from fab and never ever coming back on here because everyone knows what roxy is like as a person |
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"Do you know how I can remove my thread as all of you are correct I believe all of you know what’s best for me so after today I am going to be removing myself from fab and never ever coming back on here because everyone knows what roxy is like as a person "
Why such an over reaction? As I said before, I'm guessing there are some underlying issues here as you seem to be very down on yourself and turn any interaction into a negative one.
That being said, if yiu truly are unhappy then yes, the best option would be to remove yourself from whatever is making you unhappy. Maybe for a break, maybe forever. Who knows.
I think you are too hard on yourself though, personally. |
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"Do you know how I can remove my thread as all of you are correct I believe all of you know what’s best for me so after today I am going to be removing myself from fab and never ever coming back on here because everyone knows what roxy is like as a person "
You can ask admin to delete it or if you are leaving anyway then the thread will stay but with no name on. |
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Okay I’m going to make a long post about my experience on fab before lockdown during lockdown after lockdown after the second lockdown then you will see what I’ve been going through if you want to eat that’s entirely up to you but if you don’t want to read then don’t I’m not forcing you to |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I tried to advise, but honestly I have learned on here that your attitude plays a big part. People aren’t going to want to talk if you are rude or overly negative.
I’m not the most confident of people, and struggle with low self esteem but I don’t generally broadcast it as I know it puts people off. |
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Okay if yall already Buckle up this is going to be a long one
As you can see I don’t normally write on the forums, but last week and probably the week before I have done now I’m not venting I’m not complaining I’m just stating my thoughts and feelings I’ve had about my experience on this website I am 27 years old I have been single for over four years at the moment I’m not looking for a relationship I’m not looking to spend The rest of my days with someone I’m happy being single.
It might not seem like it from one my username to my profile three my previous threads, but what I can tell you is that my experience on fab before lockdown even was a twinkle in peoples eyes was average now at the time before lockdown and I was on fab I was getting “help” from a guy now me and this guy no longer talk because he did something that made me very uncomfortable. Now emphasis on the guy I asked for his “help” with meeting different people. At the time I was willing to meet couples and women. Now when he was messaging different people I didn’t know who was going to turn up now this isn’t the bit where things went down hill.
The bit where things go down hill he was talking to a couples account when they asked to meet on the same day (both of them) then when I started to get excited that’s when the woman half of the relationship decided that she could not meet because she had to look after her child now I wouldn’t have an issue with that had a child not being over the age of 16. She couldn’t meet but her boyfriend apparently could when he came over I just gave him a hand job that it and questioned him about his girlfriend he told me that his girlfriend had to wait for her child.
That’s how I knew that information now that’s one incident that happened before lockdown was a twinkle in peoples eye
The second incident was kind of the same but without the kid excuse.
Now after lockdown happened or should I say during lockdown I had 20+ messages from different people asking to meet, when I said no or I can’t I’ve got either one abuse two told to fuck off or three it doesn’t matter. Now onto the juicy bit The one time I was willing to meet someone who I already met before decided to be a twat and here’s what I mean. We met once before lockdown happened and then the second time we were meant to meet he decided to stand me up and what I mean by that is he asked me to wear sexy clothes which I did and meet him at the train station when I got to the train station I messaged him and asked where are you are you here apparently he says he was there but I never saw him but he saw me and he kept on telling me to do stuff in public When I refused to do it he said he won’t meet me unless I do I verify this guy on fab that’s why now I have a new account I’ll be honest with everyone I’ve been on fab before i’m not a Newbie I know the ropes but when you’ve been mugged off so many times by different people you then feel a sense of shame The reason why my name is what it was before it’s because that’s how I feel like everyone views me on this site
I’m sorry for thinking that way but honestly it’s fucking true it fucking is sorry for swearing I’m just going to leave this here if anyone wants to read it feel free to have a good day bye |
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Those guys sound like twat bags for sure and I'm sure most of us have had meets that were cancelled or where couples turned out to be men chancing it. It's not right and it's not nice but it's nothing to feel ashamed about on your part.
It sounds as if you are/were a very trusting person and you've had that tested horribly but that isn't what the most of the site is like.
I've done some things in not proud of, I've had guys walk out of meets after just a blow job, I've had men treat me like crap to be honest but each time you learn from it and set your boundaries to better suit what you are looking for.
I'm sorry you've had these experiences and that you felt like you hated yourself. I hope that you are able to heal yourself of you do decide to leave. |
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I’m not trying to sound mean or anything but I have learnt my lesson from my experiences but I feel like any time I do something different like say everything I want on my profile tell the person messaging me what I want or what I want to do to them I still feel like I get mugged off or I’m told I’m a mentally unstable person, (which honestly if was true I would be saying and doing far worse) and my username was literally just a representation of how I feel about the site well the people on the site (I know not everyone is like that) but it gets hard sometimes. Honestly I’m grateful for your guys is help but when you then judge on everything when you don’t know the full story that’s when I have problems and that’s when i feel like this site isn’t meant for me.
And another thing before I leave for work I have met a couple on here twice but I honestly don’t know how they feel about me |
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I don't think you sounded mean at all. It's frustrating when we we've been used, or lied to, or pressured in to doing things we don't want to do.
Your previous username just made it look like you were down on yourself, not that people on here thought that of you.
It's perfectly fine to be explicit in what you want but if it is something out of the 'norm' and more on the kink side then some aren't going to react to it well snf you need to steele yourself ready for that. |
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Swinging is ment too be fun!! Fab is only a small tool to add / get the fun.
I have never experienced any of this in the 10 plus years of swinging.
I think you need to leave/take a break sort out your personal problems, because fab is by the sound of it getting you down! |
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That’s the thing I know my old username was like what the.....
But I remember before I even choose my username I was thinking of a username like (ihateeveryone) but I thought that would be harsh on people who haven’t communicated with me honestly I will be honest with you all I’m just sick of the games people play but when I do the same thing I get my account banned people actually believe I’m a bloke and when I try and prove that I’m not by asking for Skype I’m the bad guy and then I get blocked. Honestly I’m not asking for sympathy I’m not asking people to help me I’m just asking people to understand before you jump to conclusions because some of you have “couples” accounts and don’t have to deal with dickheads I’m just saying. Honestly as I said before I’m just going to make a whole new account and start a fresh |
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I get that you don't want help but to be honest that's kind of what the forums do. People put up posts about something and others give their advice and guidance. Sometimes it's done nicely, sometimes not so nicely (and sometimes people are dicks).
Take on board what you want and leave what you don't but in my personal view of what you have disclosed so far... You seem to catastrophise situations to the absolute worst end and that makes you think everyone is out to get at you when they aren't.
We can only respond to what yoh say at the time. If no one had responded to your threads you'd have another issue with that behaviour. |
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Honestly my only issue is now is how do I get rid of my threads and I don’t believe everyone is out to get me. But I do believe some people have different motives of what they want and so on I’m not good at explaining things especially when I try and say my piece and people just jump to conclusions. As I said before if there was a Notification on the forums then I would of replied to everyone but because their isn’t that’s why I ended up seeing yesterday evening |
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