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Friends with benefits :(

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

I think people who openly post that they are looking for 'friends with benefits' are disgusting, I really do.

It's bad enough for those unfortunate enough to be out of work trying to find a job in the current climate, without these leeches trying to sponge off them on a site like this

Why do you never see people saying they're looking for 'friends with jobs in the police' or something instead? Because they wouldn't get away with it, thats bloody why and would probably end up getting banged up!

Once again it's the ones that can least afford it are the ones that are hit hardest in the pocket

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Good point. I shall henceforth start making it clear I am looking for "friends who are qualified massage therapists" and "friends who are independently wealthy and generous" and "friends who run latex clothing companies or make their own latex clothes".

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By *onny BonesMan  over a year ago

a block away from heaven

My impressio of friends with benefits must differ from yours.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Pmsl!

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By *icesweetgirlWoman  over a year ago

Manchester

Someone is at it again lol. But really brilliant post and thank you for making us aware of this important issue. It needs to be stopped. I only want friends with wage packet!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I want friends with housing benefits as I can't accommodate

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Lol at this thread !! Friends with tax credits ?? Friends that are emotionally secure with no psychological issues and finacialy secure !!

Lol

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Ironically... My friends on benefits are seldom doleful...

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By *ll of a QuiverCouple  over a year ago

Douglas

To quote JP McEnroe "You cannot be serious"!

Pmsl

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By *abloBackMan  over a year ago

London

I admit to once having a (cough) friend with benilyn

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I admit to once having a (cough) friend with benilyn"

Hope you gave her a good Benadryllin....;-)

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Lol at this thread !! Friends with tax credits ?? Friends that are emotionally secure with no psychological issues and finacialy secure !!

Lol "

It's the disturbing 'friends with hairy-tits', the jailbait 'friends with pocket money' and the out of touch 'friends with greenshield stamps' that I tend to try to be wary of the most

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Ironically... My friends on benefits are seldom doleful..."

It's that because they're 'turning tricks' with you on the side?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I want friends with housing benefits as I can't accommodate "

Be careful with that one mate, if you shag em more than twice a week they could lose their benefits, so you'd then have the inconvenience of finding some other strumpet at short notice

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By *abloBackMan  over a year ago

London

High Cholestrol means I have a friend with benecol

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"High Cholestrol means I have a friend with benecol"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Lol at this thread !! Friends with tax credits ?? Friends that are emotionally secure with no psychological issues and finacialy secure !!

Lol

It's the disturbing 'friends with hairy-tits', the jailbait 'friends with pocket money' and the out of touch 'friends with greenshield stamps' that I tend to try to be wary of the most "

Greenshield stamps??? Old bastard!

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By *stmateMan  over a year ago

Notts

I thought a friend with benefits was someone u were good friends with but also met up for sex(sex being the benefit),and not someone that u carry out odd jobs for sex. That's where I'm going wrong, if I offer to do their weekly shop for them does that count?

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By *abioMan  over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

friends with benefits.... or friends on benefits....

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I think people who openly post that they are looking for 'friends with benefits' are disgusting, I really do.

It's bad enough for those unfortunate enough to be out of work trying to find a job in the current climate, without these leeches trying to sponge off them on a site like this

Why do you never see people saying they're looking for 'friends with jobs in the police' or something instead? Because they wouldn't get away with it, thats bloody why and would probably end up getting banged up!

Once again it's the ones that can least afford it are the ones that are hit hardest in the pocket "

What the f@#k!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I thought a friend with benefits was someone u were good friends with but also met up for sex(sex being the benefit),and not someone that u carry out odd jobs for sex. That's where I'm going wrong, if I offer to do their weekly shop for them does that count? "

Why not put it in your profile and find out? Just make sure that you stick a tariff on there though, just so the ladies can see what they'll have to part and how often, for each specific task or errand.

You never know, it could prove to be highly successful and

mutually beneficial.

Then again you might be crap at what you do and they could be very old and smelly but I think it's a risk worth taking.

It may actually be worth considering contacting banal TV programme 'Dragon's Den' to see if they would be willing to invest in your business (A word of warning though, don't touch that ugly blonde bird on there with a barge pole, regardless of how much she offers and what jobs she asks you to do! The reason that I'm saying this is that if her clout is half as sour as her face then you are going to have serious problems with cock rot in later life)

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Not sure if the original post is supposed to be tongue in cheek, however, I do not believe there is anything wrong for those who seek friends with benefits.

As far as I am aware, "friends with benefits" means friends who are able to have sex with each other without being in a more serious relationship that excludes each other from having sex with other people.

However, I could be wrong.

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By *sprey6Man  over a year ago

Here!


"Not sure if the original post is supposed to be tongue in cheek, however, I do not believe there is anything wrong for those who seek friends with benefits.

As far as I am aware, "friends with benefits" means friends who are able to have sex with each other without being in a more serious relationship that excludes each other from having sex with other people.

PMSL top thread!

However, I could be wrong. "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I thought a friend with benefits was someone u were good friends with but also met up for sex(sex being the benefit),and not someone that u carry out odd jobs for sex. That's where I'm going wrong, if I offer to do their weekly shop for them does that count?

Why not put it in your profile and find out? Just make sure that you stick a tariff on there though, just so the ladies can see what they'll have to part and how often, for each specific task or errand.

You never know, it could prove to be highly successful and

mutually beneficial.

Then again you might be crap at what you do and they could be very old and smelly but I think it's a risk worth taking.

It may actually be worth considering contacting banal TV programme 'Dragon's Den' to see if they would be willing to invest in your business (A word of warning though, don't touch that ugly blonde bird on there with a barge pole, regardless of how much she offers and what jobs she asks you to do! The reason that I'm saying this is that if her clout is half as sour as her face then you are going to have serious problems with cock rot in later life) "

Lol at clout

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Nowt wrong wi a bit I clout mate What's thy up to today anyroad?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Nowt wrong wi a bit I clout mate What's thy up to today anyroad?"

Nowt exciting...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I think people who openly post that they are looking for 'friends with benefits' are disgusting, I really do.

It's bad enough for those unfortunate enough to be out of work trying to find a job in the current climate, without these leeches trying to sponge off them on a site like this

Why do you never see people saying they're looking for 'friends with jobs in the police' or something instead? Because they wouldn't get away with it, thats bloody why and would probably end up getting banged up!

Once again it's the ones that can least afford it are the ones that are hit hardest in the pocket "

Why has nobody spotted this loophole in the Goverments strategy before? I am going to write to my MP about this forthwith! In fact, on Monday morning, I shall be ringing LBC to demand that Nick Ferrari discuss this issue fully and frankly. All of London and the South East needs to be aware of it. Scrounging bastards! Isn't it enough that they get about £5,000 a week of taxpayers money? Now they want to be given friends who also get benefits. Damned cheek.

Now, back to reading The Telegraph where life is so much rosier....

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I think people who openly post that they are looking for 'friends with benefits' are disgusting, I really do.

It's bad enough for those unfortunate enough to be out of work trying to find a job in the current climate, without these leeches trying to sponge off them on a site like this

Why do you never see people saying they're looking for 'friends with jobs in the police' or something instead? Because they wouldn't get away with it, thats bloody why and would probably end up getting banged up!

Once again it's the ones that can least afford it are the ones that are hit hardest in the pocket

Why has nobody spotted this loophole in the Goverments strategy before? I am going to write to my MP about this forthwith! In fact, on Monday morning, I shall be ringing LBC to demand that Nick Ferrari discuss this issue fully and frankly. All of London and the South East needs to be aware of it. Scrounging bastards! Isn't it enough that they get about £5,000 a week of taxpayers money? Now they want to be given friends who also get benefits. Damned cheek.

Now, back to reading The Telegraph where life is so much rosier....

"

Get out of your comfort zone and face up to the real issues raised in Der Sturmer (Or as its known over here, the Daily Mail) and then clamour for these people to be shot!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I think people who openly post that they are looking for 'friends with benefits' are disgusting, I really do.

It's bad enough for those unfortunate enough to be out of work trying to find a job in the current climate, without these leeches trying to sponge off them on a site like this

Why do you never see people saying they're looking for 'friends with jobs in the police' or something instead? Because they wouldn't get away with it, thats bloody why and would probably end up getting banged up!

Once again it's the ones that can least afford it are the ones that are hit hardest in the pocket

Why has nobody spotted this loophole in the Goverments strategy before? I am going to write to my MP about this forthwith! In fact, on Monday morning, I shall be ringing LBC to demand that Nick Ferrari discuss this issue fully and frankly. All of London and the South East needs to be aware of it. Scrounging bastards! Isn't it enough that they get about £5,000 a week of taxpayers money? Now they want to be given friends who also get benefits. Damned cheek.

Now, back to reading The Telegraph where life is so much rosier....

Get out of your comfort zone and face up to the real issues raised in Der Sturmer (Or as its known over here, the Daily Mail) and then clamour for these people to be shot! "

Shot! That's it! get the Army out after them. They are unemployed now that the Olympics are over and will give them some worthwhile target practice. In fact, if they concentrate on East London, they could bring in the Royal Tank Regiment and get rid of those annoying little oyiks in the tower blocks who had the temerity to try to stop 'our lads' stationing their anti-aircraft missiles on top of their shabby little 'block of flats' (whatever they are..???) and who are, no doubt, also scroungers looking for 'friends with benefits'. I believe in modern parlance, that is called a 'win-win' situation..??

(Retires with Rogets Thesaurus to prepare suitable letter to Sunday Times)

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I think people who openly post that they are looking for 'friends with benefits' are disgusting, I really do.

It's bad enough for those unfortunate enough to be out of work trying to find a job in the current climate, without these leeches trying to sponge off them on a site like this

Why do you never see people saying they're looking for 'friends with jobs in the police' or something instead? Because they wouldn't get away with it, thats bloody why and would probably end up getting banged up!

Once again it's the ones that can least afford it are the ones that are hit hardest in the pocket

Why has nobody spotted this loophole in the Goverments strategy before? I am going to write to my MP about this forthwith! In fact, on Monday morning, I shall be ringing LBC to demand that Nick Ferrari discuss this issue fully and frankly. All of London and the South East needs to be aware of it. Scrounging bastards! Isn't it enough that they get about £5,000 a week of taxpayers money? Now they want to be given friends who also get benefits. Damned cheek.

Now, back to reading The Telegraph where life is so much rosier....

Get out of your comfort zone and face up to the real issues raised in Der Sturmer (Or as its known over here, the Daily Mail) and then clamour for these people to be shot!

Shot! That's it! get the Army out after them. They are unemployed now that the Olympics are over and will give them some worthwhile target practice. In fact, if they concentrate on East London, they could bring in the Royal Tank Regiment and get rid of those annoying little oyiks in the tower blocks who had the temerity to try to stop 'our lads' stationing their anti-aircraft missiles on top of their shabby little 'block of flats' (whatever they are..???) and who are, no doubt, also scroungers looking for 'friends with benefits'. I believe in modern parlance, that is called a 'win-win' situation..??

(Retires with Rogets Thesaurus to prepare suitable letter to Sunday Times)

"

Pmsl and someone will take your reply seriously in 5, 4, 3, 2 .........

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I think people who openly post that they are looking for 'friends with benefits' are disgusting, I really do.

It's bad enough for those unfortunate enough to be out of work trying to find a job in the current climate, without these leeches trying to sponge off them on a site like this

Why do you never see people saying they're looking for 'friends with jobs in the police' or something instead? Because they wouldn't get away with it, thats bloody why and would probably end up getting banged up!

Once again it's the ones that can least afford it are the ones that are hit hardest in the pocket

Why has nobody spotted this loophole in the Goverments strategy before? I am going to write to my MP about this forthwith! In fact, on Monday morning, I shall be ringing LBC to demand that Nick Ferrari discuss this issue fully and frankly. All of London and the South East needs to be aware of it. Scrounging bastards! Isn't it enough that they get about £5,000 a week of taxpayers money? Now they want to be given friends who also get benefits. Damned cheek.

Now, back to reading The Telegraph where life is so much rosier....

Get out of your comfort zone and face up to the real issues raised in Der Sturmer (Or as its known over here, the Daily Mail) and then clamour for these people to be shot!

Shot! That's it! get the Army out after them. They are unemployed now that the Olympics are over and will give them some worthwhile target practice. In fact, if they concentrate on East London, they could bring in the Royal Tank Regiment and get rid of those annoying little oyiks in the tower blocks who had the temerity to try to stop 'our lads' stationing their anti-aircraft missiles on top of their shabby little 'block of flats' (whatever they are..???) and who are, no doubt, also scroungers looking for 'friends with benefits'. I believe in modern parlance, that is called a 'win-win' situation..??

(Retires with Rogets Thesaurus to prepare suitable letter to Sunday Times)

Pmsl and someone will take your reply seriously in 5, 4, 3, 2 ......... "

pmsl!!!

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By *riskygazMan  over a year ago

birmingham

i want a friend with the new Triumph tiger exsplorer 1200, because i wont to have a test ride on it oh and if she wonts to ride my afterwards well i think thats only fair lol

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By *abloBackMan  over a year ago

London

Nobody has ever benefited from being friendly to nick Ferrari

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I like being a blood sucker!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

i need a friend that fancies coming with me to chams on sunday

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"i need a friend that fancies coming with me to chams on sunday "

.

Remember what femme said about no +1s not so long ago in the party thread.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"i need a friend that fancies coming with me to chams on sunday

.

Remember what femme said about no +1s not so long ago in the party thread.

"

yeah but if hes on my couples membership

and how do i know there isnt gonna be no good looking men x

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Can I get the benefits and work on the friendship bit after?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Can I get the benefits and work on the friendship bit after?"

Yeah of course I can give you a buffing without even liking you no problem

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By *phroditeWoman  over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"Can I get the benefits and work on the friendship bit after?"
Thats what I was wondering about...

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"Can I get the benefits and work on the friendship bit after?Thats what I was wondering about..."

Is there a claim form do you think? If it's needs assessed I should do quite well as I'm always in need. The government cuts seem to have affected my access to benefits already. Just don't tell the Daily M..l that I'm black.

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By *phroditeWoman  over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"Can I get the benefits and work on the friendship bit after?Thats what I was wondering about...

Is there a claim form do you think? If it's needs assessed I should do quite well as I'm always in need. The government cuts seem to have affected my access to benefits already. Just don't tell the Daily M..l that I'm black."

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By *emmefataleWoman  over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville


"I think people who openly post that they are looking for 'friends with benefits' are disgusting, I really do.

It's bad enough for those unfortunate enough to be out of work trying to find a job in the current climate, without these leeches trying to sponge off them on a site like this

Why do you never see people saying they're looking for 'friends with jobs in the police' or something instead? Because they wouldn't get away with it, thats bloody why and would probably end up getting banged up!

Once again it's the ones that can least afford it are the ones that are hit hardest in the pocket "

i dont get it

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"i dont get it "

.

You are not alone!

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By *abloBackMan  over a year ago

London


" i dont get it "

Have you tried amending your profile?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"My impressio of friends with benefits must differ from yours."

Here here I thought it always meant, mmmm sexual benefits! Think they must have been thinkin about gold diggers instead don't you?

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By *abloBackMan  over a year ago

London

Signing on for sex

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I shouldn't laugh but it is a bit funny those people giving serious replies...

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


" i dont get it

Have you tried amending your profile?"

Haha, you're getting good

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I shouldn't laugh but it is a bit funny those people giving serious replies... "

It goes with the territory lol

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By *ont Ask Dont GetWoman  over a year ago

amersham


"I shouldn't laugh but it is a bit funny those people giving serious replies... "

The op made me laugh but the serious responses...absolute magic! LOOOOOOL

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By *empting Devil.Woman  over a year ago

Sheffield

I lolled and lolled. Then I got onto the benefits fraud hotline. with username details ...

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I lolled and lolled. Then I got onto the benefits fraud hotline. with username details ... "

Great idea, thanks These people need to be held accountable for their actions

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By *empting Devil.Woman  over a year ago

Sheffield


"I lolled and lolled. Then I got onto the benefits fraud hotline. with username details ...

Great idea, thanks These people need to be held accountable for their actions "

It's stored in my phone as one of my favourites. Right next to the Daily Mails aren't you doing a fantastic job saving the nation from incomers, furrigners and degenerates hotline

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I lolled and lolled. Then I got onto the benefits fraud hotline. with username details ...

Great idea, thanks These people need to be held accountable for their actions

It's stored in my phone as one of my favourites. Right next to the Daily Mails aren't you doing a fantastic job saving the nation from incomers, furrigners and degenerates hotline "

Hahaha, oh you are all heart sweetie Who needs a tolerant society when you can rely on the good old daily mail to whip up constant hatred to the x-factor masses? lol

Will I see you again at the Fuhrer's birthday rememberence bash next year hon?

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By *empting Devil.Woman  over a year ago

Sheffield


"I lolled and lolled. Then I got onto the benefits fraud hotline. with username details ...

Great idea, thanks These people need to be held accountable for their actions

It's stored in my phone as one of my favourites. Right next to the Daily Mails aren't you doing a fantastic job saving the nation from incomers, furrigners and degenerates hotline

Hahaha, oh you are all heart sweetie Who needs a tolerant society when you can rely on the good old daily mail to whip up constant hatred to the x-factor masses? lol

Will I see you again at the Fuhrer's birthday rememberence bash next year hon?

"

Of course not!

I'm all about Il Duce...

The food is far better than that ersatz veggie muck that Hans churns out each year and who can resist a party on an Italian lake?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I lolled and lolled. Then I got onto the benefits fraud hotline. with username details ...

Great idea, thanks These people need to be held accountable for their actions

It's stored in my phone as one of my favourites. Right next to the Daily Mails aren't you doing a fantastic job saving the nation from incomers, furrigners and degenerates hotline

Hahaha, oh you are all heart sweetie Who needs a tolerant society when you can rely on the good old daily mail to whip up constant hatred to the x-factor masses? lol

Will I see you again at the Fuhrer's birthday rememberence bash next year hon?

Of course not!

I'm all about Il Duce...

The food is far better than that ersatz veggie muck that Hans churns out each year and who can resist a party on an Italian lake? "

Now that is a very good point, well put!

Do you know what the dress code is for said bash? Is it just casual or is it usually a black-shirt and tie affair?

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