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Lockdown loss of confidence
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Absolutely, it's becoming a reality of meeting again now so its only natural to have these feelings. I wouldn't say I've lost mine but it's definitely been dented and it's a scary thought being with someone again after all this time. |
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By *VineMan
over a year ago
The right place |
I haven’t lost my confidence. I’ve just lost interest in some of the things that were ‘normal’ before. I’m in no rush to fill my life up with things that I do because I felt obligated. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes, absolutely.
Both body confidence and socially"
Yes, I have a terrible feeling of anxiety when I think about going anywhere where other people are. I went into a cafe for the first time the other day and I was shaking. It's ridiculous  |
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The end of my last relationship coincided with the first lockdown and it floored me.
My confidence is in the gutter when it comes to the opposite sex but I'm in no rush to gain it, coz in truth I see meeting as hassle on my psyche I really don't need. I may be momentarily happier when I've a connection with someone but ultimately it isn't good for my mental health or my soul.
I've confidence in my ability at work. First week back and I've smashed it, lost 2lb and although I'm shattered I feel I achieved. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"(taps head) can't lose what you never had.
Seriously, of course, it's always gonna affect you in one way or another. I guess the good news is that many will feel just the same. "
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"I haven’t lost my confidence. I’ve just lost interest in some of the things that were ‘normal’ before. I’m in no rush to fill my life up with things that I do because I felt obligated. "
exactly this
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I think that Mrs P has lost alot of confidence during lockdown and its going to take time to get it it back and meet people again. I am finding that lots of guys don't understand this, but there again they are probably not the guys for us. |
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"I haven’t lost my confidence. I’ve just lost interest in some of the things that were ‘normal’ before. I’m in no rush to fill my life up with things that I do because I felt obligated. exactly this"
Agreed...its been an opportunity to reflect on what's is important...what you do and don't need in your life. Ultimately what positive things make you happy. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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yes definitely, I was just beginning to push myself to be more daring and maybe even go to a party when Covid struck. Now I have lost confidence and just hate my body again, Ady is understanding and I want to be naughty but not easy at the moment. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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ive said before us men can shrug things off like weight and problems.
i know some women (not all) cannot and they get down and feel unattractive.
not easy when you look at some of the people and think to yourself i will never look like that.
we defeat ourselves with overthinking too much.
all of us have an attraction, we may not know it. but you do.
stop drowning. pull yourself up and float for a bit.  |
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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
South Wales |
A gentleman I chat to regularly on here has mentioned feeling a bit unsure about things going back to normal and being around people again. You're not alone OP.
I think it’s a normal reaction after all the things we’ve heard and seen over the past year or so, we’ve all built up a wall around ourselves and we have to slowly take it down again.
You’ll get there, just take as much time as you need and go at things at your own pace. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not sure I've lost confidence, more weary (if that's the right word) of getting out and about. Silly I know, but that's where I'm at with things at moment. |
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By *ooBulMan
over a year ago
Missin’ Yo’ Kissin’ |
I'm not feeling sorry for myself nor do I expect sympathy.
I've not lost confidence more a case of can't be bothered....I'm still positive and optimistic and when I can't, then realistic!
I seem to lack motivation I guess???? Apathy or indiference may be a better explanation. I feel nothing just stone cold. Outside a fish bowl looking in perhaps.
I have goals & objectives both personal & where I want to go... It's just that the climate ain't right at the moment!
I'll remain balanced & confused until we are directed otherwise.... and yes I can think for myself too thanks!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm not feeling sorry for myself nor do I expect sympathy.
I've not lost confidence more a case of can't be bothered....I'm still positive and optimistic and when I can't, then realistic!
I seem to lack motivation I guess???? Apathy or indiference may be a better explanation. I feel nothing just stone cold. Outside a fish bowl looking in perhaps.
I have goals & objectives both personal & where I want to go... It's just that the climate ain't right at the moment!
I'll remain balanced & confused until we are directed otherwise.... and yes I can think for myself too thanks! "
I can totally relate.
Im the person who still hasn't stepped foot in an non essential shop and hasn't eaten out in a restaurant.
I did go to the gym for the first time today but it did feel weird.
I guess with all the uncertainty of the last year I'd rather have some certainty before I dive back in to my old normality.
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"I'm not feeling sorry for myself nor do I expect sympathy.
I've not lost confidence more a case of can't be bothered....I'm still positive and optimistic and when I can't, then realistic!
I seem to lack motivation I guess???? Apathy or indiference may be a better explanation. I feel nothing just stone cold. Outside a fish bowl looking in perhaps.
I have goals & objectives both personal & where I want to go... It's just that the climate ain't right at the moment!
I'll remain balanced & confused until we are directed otherwise.... and yes I can think for myself too thanks!
I can totally relate.
Im the person who still hasn't stepped foot in an non essential shop and hasn't eaten out in a restaurant.
I did go to the gym for the first time today but it did feel weird.
I guess with all the uncertainty of the last year I'd rather have some certainty before I dive back in to my old normality.
"
If it's any reassurance at all, I'm in a similar boat – supermarket, post office, doctor's, that's it. I've basically been behaving throughout as though the first lockdown never lifted. I'm fortunate that my circumstances have allowed me to conduct my life in such a strictly responsible manner.
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By *reya73Woman
over a year ago
Whitley Bay |
I did at first. But theres no pressure OP. Shape your world to fit your pace and go easy. You'll be OK. There's no need to 'get back to how you were'.
It's natural that we reassess and readjust to what is now ..and maybe you know yourself a bit better, what you like and don't like. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’ve gone the other way, before the pandemic I had little to no confidence but over the last year I’ve been building myself up and for the most part feel better than I have |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’ve gone the other way, before the pandemic I had little to no confidence but over the last year I’ve been building myself up and for the most part feel better than I have"
Love this!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"ive said before us men can shrug things off like weight and problems.
i know some women (not all) cannot and they get down and feel unattractive.
not easy when you look at some of the people and think to yourself i will never look like that.
we defeat ourselves with overthinking too much.
all of us have an attraction, we may not know it. but you do.
*** stop drowning. pull yourself up and float for a bit. *** "
*** I really like this!! |
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As much as I want to go out again I know I’ve put on some weight over the lockdown. So not too keen on going out just now, once I get back to the gym and do some more running I will I feel a bit better about myself.
So for someone who’s normally quite confident and optimistic I have actually had some self doubt recently. So totally empathetic with all are feeling the same now.
Let’s hope it’s a great summer, so the pandemic and its after affects are a distance memory. |
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Yes, I gained weight during lock-down and need to find the confidence of meeting people again. Then I will find out how confident I am with sex and stimulation.
The mind is willing but the body is not ready yet  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Luckily for me I’ve managed to keep working so this has helped me not going insane at least but I understand other people predicaments here and fully appreciated that it’s been a very difficult 18 months nearly, all I can say it breathe and take one thing at a time life is a journey and every road is a cross road only you can make the correct choice for you |
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Nope. Not in the slightest. I've got a new job, was asked by the US VP to move into a better role while I was still on induction, and I've just had the exciting news that the dance troupe I'm in has a gig at a festival next month. I can't bloody wait. The only thing I need is for travel restrictions to do one and I'll be fandabbydozy |
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"Nope. Not in the slightest. I've got a new job, was asked by the US VP to move into a better role while I was still on induction, and I've just had the exciting news that the dance troupe I'm in has a gig at a festival next month. I can't bloody wait. The only thing I need is for travel restrictions to do one and I'll be fandabbydozy "
I'm really pleased for you..sounds like amazing opportunities, good luck with them x |
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"Nope. Not in the slightest. I've got a new job, was asked by the US VP to move into a better role while I was still on induction, and I've just had the exciting news that the dance troupe I'm in has a gig at a festival next month. I can't bloody wait. The only thing I need is for travel restrictions to do one and I'll be fandabbydozy
I'm really pleased for you..sounds like amazing opportunities, good luck with them x"
Thank you...I'm embracing them and feeling satisfied that my previous hard work has paid off and led to this |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If that’s how you feel, it’s completely valid. Lots of people have lost confidence, me included. We’ve had a horribly tough year, been isolated and alone, and have learnt to live as more solitary people, and now we have to unlearn that, whilst grieving the lives we have lost, and it *is/can be* grief, and sadness and sorrow.
Be kind to yourselves |
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LvM
we're all in the same boat x
