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The single person in a threesome
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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
After looking posting on another thread regarding unicorns meeting couples, I’ve started to ponder about the different experiences for singles meeting couples.
There seems to be a huge difference of approach and mindset in regards to meeting guys and women, why do you think that is?
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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"Can you explain the question a bit more?
I have met single men alone and with my other half!"
With couples meeting single women, the onus is on the lady being part of the dynamic, not having their sexuality being performative and being comfortable. Single guys it’s almost the opposite. |
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I obviously can't speak for how men are treated, but I stopped advertising the fact that I was looking to play with couples a long time ago purely because of the attitude towards me...the vast majority of couples that contacted me were looking for a living, breathing sex toy, no real care about what I was getting out of it as long as they got what they wanted. And yes, I know that not all couples are like that, but the majority that contacted me certainly gave me that impression.
In answer to your question, I'd say it's more to do with the couples attitude towards the "guest player" than it is about the gender of that person. |
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We always emphasise that a man joining us is our equal in terms of where their boundaries are etc and if a guy asks for advice on the subject I often say to him to expect respect and equality. However it's a numbers game, men are plentiful and often eager to please so will go along with a couple's disrespectful treatment. I've seen some shocking attitudes towards men by couples.
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I understand what you mean.
I won't meet a couple hunting a unicorn to fulfil their life time fantasy as I'm a person not a fantasy.
I do meet with couples that are open to ffm and where we are all considered as equal (kinky scenerio asides)
It's easier to find a single male that I and a female friend both like than it is to find a couple I find. |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
"Can you explain the question a bit more?
I have met single men alone and with my other half!
With couples meeting single women, the onus is on the lady being part of the dynamic, not having their sexuality being performative and being comfortable. Single guys it’s almost the opposite. "
Cynical view time - I think that's in part due to some couples cottoning on to there being fewer single women and fewer again who want to meet couples so they advertise as wanting someone to be part of their dynamic rather than a living fleshlight. The amount of couples I've spoken to where it's very clear I'd be there in a fleshlight role, designed to fulfil their fantasies rather than an actual person who might have my own.
I also think that some (note the some) couples who look for single men are very much only interested in the sex side of things, rather than the social. That in turn means they only want people who are sexual accessories to be briefly used.
Please note some. Some couples.  |
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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"Can you explain the question a bit more?
I have met single men alone and with my other half!
With couples meeting single women, the onus is on the lady being part of the dynamic, not having their sexuality being performative and being comfortable. Single guys it’s almost the opposite.
Cynical view time - I think that's in part due to some couples cottoning on to there being fewer single women and fewer again who want to meet couples so they advertise as wanting someone to be part of their dynamic rather than a living fleshlight. The amount of couples I've spoken to where it's very clear I'd be there in a fleshlight role, designed to fulfil their fantasies rather than an actual person who might have my own.
I also think that some (note the some) couples who look for single men are very much only interested in the sex side of things, rather than the social. That in turn means they only want people who are sexual accessories to be briefly used.
Please note some. Some couples. "
So it’s the fact that guys are more plentiful, so couples can be more dismissive of them? Whereas with women, they *have* to be more respectful? |
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I’ve done very few couples meets as a single fem because it can feel like your there to ‘perform’ and it can feel like your needs are forgotten. I have been lucky on occasions to find a couple where I felt we were all treated equally and my needs if anything felt like a priority. It’s sometimes easier to grab a single male and do a couple meet. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"After looking posting on another thread regarding unicorns meeting couples, I’ve started to ponder about the different experiences for singles meeting couples.
There seems to be a huge difference of approach and mindset in regards to meeting guys and women, why do you think that is?
"
My Mrs used to meet a couple for 3some sex, she never said she felt uncomfortable in any way
We’ve also had men join us both too   |
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By *dwalu2Couple
over a year ago
Bristol |
"Can you explain the question a bit more?
I have met single men alone and with my other half!
With couples meeting single women, the onus is on the lady being part of the dynamic, not having their sexuality being performative and being comfortable. Single guys it’s almost the opposite.
Cynical view time - I think that's in part due to some couples cottoning on to there being fewer single women and fewer again who want to meet couples so they advertise as wanting someone to be part of their dynamic rather than a living fleshlight. The amount of couples I've spoken to where it's very clear I'd be there in a fleshlight role, designed to fulfil their fantasies rather than an actual person who might have my own.
I also think that some (note the some) couples who look for single men are very much only interested in the sex side of things, rather than the social. That in turn means they only want people who are sexual accessories to be briefly used.
Please note some. Some couples.
So it’s the fact that guys are more plentiful, so couples can be more dismissive of them? Whereas with women, they *have* to be more respectful? "
That’s self-evident surely...there are so many men on Fab that a couple could probably explicitly state they intended to rob whoever turns up and some men would still get in the car and head on over.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can you explain the question a bit more?
I have met single men alone and with my other half!
With couples meeting single women, the onus is on the lady being part of the dynamic, not having their sexuality being performative and being comfortable. Single guys it’s almost the opposite.
Cynical view time - I think that's in part due to some couples cottoning on to there being fewer single women and fewer again who want to meet couples so they advertise as wanting someone to be part of their dynamic rather than a living fleshlight. The amount of couples I've spoken to where it's very clear I'd be there in a fleshlight role, designed to fulfil their fantasies rather than an actual person who might have my own.
I also think that some (note the some) couples who look for single men are very much only interested in the sex side of things, rather than the social. That in turn means they only want people who are sexual accessories to be briefly used.
Please note some. Some couples. "
Great point |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can you explain the question a bit more?
I have met single men alone and with my other half!
With couples meeting single women, the onus is on the lady being part of the dynamic, not having their sexuality being performative and being comfortable. Single guys it’s almost the opposite.
Cynical view time - I think that's in part due to some couples cottoning on to there being fewer single women and fewer again who want to meet couples so they advertise as wanting someone to be part of their dynamic rather than a living fleshlight. The amount of couples I've spoken to where it's very clear I'd be there in a fleshlight role, designed to fulfil their fantasies rather than an actual person who might have my own.
I also think that some (note the some) couples who look for single men are very much only interested in the sex side of things, rather than the social. That in turn means they only want people who are sexual accessories to be briefly used.
Please note some. Some couples.
So it’s the fact that guys are more plentiful, so couples can be more dismissive of them? Whereas with women, they *have* to be more respectful? "
I think it's because some couples just aren't very nice people
Just like some men
And some women |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I also stopped being willing to play with couples because I realised that I was just there as an accessory - the woman in the couple just wanted to put on a girly show for her man without any thought to my pleasure, or worse - I was a 'gift'.
I'm sure there are some lovely couples out there, but the dynamic is difficult to navigate and it's easier to just find 2 other singles for a fully equal ffm. |
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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"Can you explain the question a bit more?
I have met single men alone and with my other half!
With couples meeting single women, the onus is on the lady being part of the dynamic, not having their sexuality being performative and being comfortable. Single guys it’s almost the opposite.
Cynical view time - I think that's in part due to some couples cottoning on to there being fewer single women and fewer again who want to meet couples so they advertise as wanting someone to be part of their dynamic rather than a living fleshlight. The amount of couples I've spoken to where it's very clear I'd be there in a fleshlight role, designed to fulfil their fantasies rather than an actual person who might have my own.
I also think that some (note the some) couples who look for single men are very much only interested in the sex side of things, rather than the social. That in turn means they only want people who are sexual accessories to be briefly used.
Please note some. Some couples.
So it’s the fact that guys are more plentiful, so couples can be more dismissive of them? Whereas with women, they *have* to be more respectful?
I think it's because some couples just aren't very nice people
Just like some men
And some women "
True.
And some guys just don’t care as long as they get sex |
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"I obviously can't speak for how men are treated, but I stopped advertising the fact that I was looking to play with couples a long time ago purely because of the attitude towards me...the vast majority of couples that contacted me were looking for a living, breathing sex toy, no real care about what I was getting out of it as long as they got what they wanted. And yes, I know that not all couples are like that, but the majority that contacted me certainly gave me that impression.
In answer to your question, I'd say it's more to do with the couples attitude towards the "guest player" than it is about the gender of that person. "
That’s why I won’t meet couples. I think that’s how I would feel. I’d feel like an extra. I would meet someone as a couple as I know I would go out of my way to make sure they didn’t feel like that but I don’t think I’d ever meet a couple. |
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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"I also stopped being willing to play with couples because I realised that I was just there as an accessory - the woman in the couple just wanted to put on a girly show for her man without any thought to my pleasure, or worse - I was a 'gift'.
I'm sure there are some lovely couples out there, but the dynamic is difficult to navigate and it's easier to just find 2 other singles for a fully equal ffm. "
That’s interesting, I’ve always found it easier to be with and organise threesomes with couples involved. I can see how that would work as a better dynamic though, as long as everyone trusted each other.
Your post has touched on the point of female bisexuality being viewed as performative as well. Which is back to the male gaze of sexuality being the basic issue |
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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
I’ve also noticed how many women want to meet other women but won’t meet couples, is it that men are the issue in that situation?
I’m not pointing fingers here but I’m curious as to the thought process |
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"I’ve also noticed how many women want to meet other women but won’t meet couples, is it that men are the issue in that situation?
I’m not pointing fingers here but I’m curious as to the thought process "
For me it is. I just want to meet women one to one. No men involved in any way. |
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I've played twice with couples.
Once where I was pretty much left to my own devices sat on the end of the bed next to the bag of toys. The general feel I got was that they really enjoyed being watched. That experience did nothing for me.
And the other time was much more interactive. Sadly the male partner kept typing to push my boundaries which was unacceptable to me. He wanted bare back. I didnt. He went in rather a lot. I left. So that experience was rather unfulfilling too.
Neither couples are on my veris btw so dont bother trying to look for them.
I'm much more picky now due to these experiences. I know not all couples are like that but it rather soured the idea for me. Maybe if I meet the right couple I would reconsider one day. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We always emphasise that a man joining us is our equal in terms of where their boundaries are etc and if a guy asks for advice on the subject I often say to him to expect respect and equality. However it's a numbers game, men are plentiful and often eager to please so will go along with a couple's disrespectful treatment. I've seen some shocking attitudes towards men by couples.
"
Thank you.
One of the reason I now stay off the forum is the attitude towards single guys. You even have men starting threads about men's behaviour just to get agreement from women.
Most, not all the women who use this forum often add to these threads deriding men because they think it's funny to do so, sadly and disappointingly some of these were friends.
I understand men are their own downfall at times but when you see such disrespect mained at them it's no wonder all that's left are the rubbish they complain about.
The quality women avoid these type of threads that are abusive towards men because they are of a higher standard and not easily swayed by them or consider themselves royalty. They know how to treat the right guys equally and they get respect in return.
People talk about abuse but what goes on here towards men shows a real lack of quality.
This is my opinion, don't care if you disagree I won't be interested in your opinion or adding to it. |
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"I obviously can't speak for how men are treated, but I stopped advertising the fact that I was looking to play with couples a long time ago purely because of the attitude towards me...the vast majority of couples that contacted me were looking for a living, breathing sex toy, no real care about what I was getting out of it as long as they got what they wanted. And yes, I know that not all couples are like that, but the majority that contacted me certainly gave me that impression.
In answer to your question, I'd say it's more to do with the couples attitude towards the "guest player" than it is about the gender of that person. "
It's a shame that what you describe is so often the case. I often see what looks like this approach in forum threads where couples are looking for a woman to join them.
We have a meet lined up and suspect it will go in that direction. It's very important to us that she thoroughly enjoys anything happening between us all. We want to be good for her every bit as much as we want her to be good for us. A lot of the enjoyment we get from sex is from being able to give pleasure to the other. Extending that to others seems like a very natural progression. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hmmm, I've actually never had sex with more than one person at a time and, I think I'm in the minority here, it doesn't really appeal that much.
To me it would feel like that as soon as you get into multiple partners it would become to a certain extent "performative" and not just about enjoying each others bodies in a totally relaxed way... hmmm, maybe I just have a narrow attention span!
I could certainly see how it would be fun in a larger group, where the performative nature of it is part of the expected experience. |
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By *sm265Woman
over a year ago
Shangri-la |
I do think some (not all) couples view the 3rd person (male or female) as a bit of an accessory rather than as an actual person, they are merely a tool to enable them to fulfil their fantasies. |
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We would chat and chat and chat some more to single women to ensure they knew they weren’t our plaything but an equal.
It would be the same for the single guys too...everyone in the 3 would be an equal.
They are there because they are excited by us and also feel comfortable with us...we would hate it if someone felt like they were a performing seal.
Unless it’s a specific scenario where less chat was required and all three parties agreed with that, then we would chat and chat to both a single woman and man the same way. We want to get to know them to understand what works for them.
K
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By *indergirlWoman
over a year ago
somewhere, someplace |
I've be very fortunate with the couples I've met in that it was an all inclusive experience, we were all there for each others pleasure and I think the fact that we knew that from the get go helped, I have however had situations where it's been the whole well he wants to see me have so and so done to me by a woman and it's felt as if I would be there as a toy and a tick list item so I've passed on those.
For me personally I have to find both parties appealing and have a good rapport with both of them too, if I'm there I'm there for both of them and me.
I think it's just generally easier for guys to join a couple than a female (unless it's a straight female scenario) as it's really only the female they're there for so it's an easier dynamic to it.
I'm out there and looking for couples to meet with but it definitely takes time as they have to be the right one as I want to meet them socially first before any fun happens x |
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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"We always emphasise that a man joining us is our equal in terms of where their boundaries are etc and if a guy asks for advice on the subject I often say to him to expect respect and equality. However it's a numbers game, men are plentiful and often eager to please so will go along with a couple's disrespectful treatment. I've seen some shocking attitudes towards men by couples.
Thank you.
One of the reason I now stay off the forum is the attitude towards single guys. You even have men starting threads about men's behaviour just to get agreement from women.
Most, not all the women who use this forum often add to these threads deriding men because they think it's funny to do so, sadly and disappointingly some of these were friends.
I understand men are their own downfall at times but when you see such disrespect mained at them it's no wonder all that's left are the rubbish they complain about.
The quality women avoid these type of threads that are abusive towards men because they are of a higher standard and not easily swayed by them or consider themselves royalty. They know how to treat the right guys equally and they get respect in return.
People talk about abuse but what goes on here towards men shows a real lack of quality.
This is my opinion, don't care if you disagree I won't be interested in your opinion or adding to it."
Back with another tirade I see?
It’s interesting how you perceive this to be anti-male rhetoric but your pro-male rhetoric is acceptable?
Funnily enough, I’m not interested in your opinion either.
Back to the thread now |
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"I've played twice with couples.
Once where I was pretty much left to my own devices sat on the end of the bed next to the bag of toys. The general feel I got was that they really enjoyed being watched. That experience did nothing for me.
And the other time was much more interactive. Sadly the male partner kept typing to push my boundaries which was unacceptable to me. He wanted bare back. I didnt. He went in rather a lot. I left. So that experience was rather unfulfilling too.
Neither couples are on my veris btw so dont bother trying to look for them.
I'm much more picky now due to these experiences. I know not all couples are like that but it rather soured the idea for me. Maybe if I meet the right couple I would reconsider one day. "
I am so sorry to hear this is what happened to you, not very nice to feel left out, or used...
I can only speak for us, obviously, and not for all, but we both treat our visiting playfriends with the utmost respect and kindness, it's far more all about them than it is us.
I guess communication about expectations and needs should be well entered into and agreed long before being actually face to face,
and leaving is the best way to put your point across if thoughts and feelings aren't being respected.
Nobody should be in a situation they aren't happy with. |
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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago
East London |
"I’ve also noticed how many women want to meet other women but won’t meet couples, is it that men are the issue in that situation?
I’m not pointing fingers here but I’m curious as to the thought process "
If I wanted a couple I would want them both. If I wanted a woman on her own I wouldn't want the man there. Same goes for when I meet a man; I don't want his wife or GF there, or anyone sending photos back to a partner. |
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We've met single men, but my stance doesn't change regardless if which gender we would meet.
I ask what it is they want and like. If they say I don't mind etc that kind of puts an end to it for me. I want as the female that everyone is there because they want to experience something not just be a means to a way for a fuck. I should be an equality in the experience sought after in my opinion. |
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I love meeting men for mfm and i take the time to get to know them all. In no way do I see them as just an extra to satisfy my needs. They need to be the right personality so we all get along and we always do socials first. I want them to enjoy the experience as much as we do. I take the time to find out what they like and how they want the meet to go. Every man we have played with we have kept in contact with and chat with fairly frequently. All the single men we have met have been very respectful.
We haven't ever played with a woman because it seems to be very difficult to find women who want to meet couples. If we did then we would approach things in the same way, finding out how she likes to play and what she would like from the meet.
It's about the person or people not what category they fall into. We don't all behave the same way or want the same thing. No matter who we play with we want it to be a positive experience for everyone and for them to feel comfortable with us.
Kx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Have only just chatted to my partner about possible exploration with women/couples (on my own). Generally, I have found it difficult to find couples on here who aren’t pushy, or who get extremely defensive if I say there is no attraction. On the whole it hasn’t been good, although there have been the odd sweet ones. I think it’s going to take a long while to find a couple I would be remotely comfortable with x |
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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"I love meeting men for mfm and i take the time to get to know them all. In no way do I see them as just an extra to satisfy my needs. They need to be the right personality so we all get along and we always do socials first. I want them to enjoy the experience as much as we do. I take the time to find out what they like and how they want the meet to go. Every man we have played with we have kept in contact with and chat with fairly frequently. All the single men we have met have been very respectful.
We haven't ever played with a woman because it seems to be very difficult to find women who want to meet couples. If we did then we would approach things in the same way, finding out how she likes to play and what she would like from the meet.
It's about the person or people not what category they fall into. We don't all behave the same way or want the same thing. No matter who we play with we want it to be a positive experience for everyone and for them to feel comfortable with us.
Kx"
This is kind of what I was thinking of in terms of how I think it ‘should’ look.
I’ve been lucky in the fact that those that I have met, have had a similar view to yourselves |
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It all depends on the couple and the mood I'm in. Gay male couples in my experience are quite tricky and picky. In Mf couples the female usually meeting to please hubby so he can play with a guy, the bonus for me is I get to play with both, being bi, that really suits me. |
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"I love meeting men for mfm and i take the time to get to know them all. In no way do I see them as just an extra to satisfy my needs. They need to be the right personality so we all get along and we always do socials first. I want them to enjoy the experience as much as we do. I take the time to find out what they like and how they want the meet to go. Every man we have played with we have kept in contact with and chat with fairly frequently. All the single men we have met have been very respectful.
We haven't ever played with a woman because it seems to be very difficult to find women who want to meet couples. If we did then we would approach things in the same way, finding out how she likes to play and what she would like from the meet.
It's about the person or people not what category they fall into. We don't all behave the same way or want the same thing. No matter who we play with we want it to be a positive experience for everyone and for them to feel comfortable with us.
Kx
This is kind of what I was thinking of in terms of how I think it ‘should’ look.
I’ve been lucky in the fact that those that I have met, have had a similar view to yourselves "
Well the better everyone gets on then the better the sex hopefully.
It's worked for us so far
Kx |
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"After looking posting on another thread regarding unicorns meeting couples, I’ve started to ponder about the different experiences for singles meeting couples.
There seems to be a huge difference of approach and mindset in regards to meeting guys and women, why do you think that is?
"
I agree with you somewhat. There can be a big difference. When inviting someone to join there is alot more emphasis on the lady being asked to join amd more effort put in than when a fella. But saying that, correct me if I'm wrong, how many unicorns message couples "i wanna ride your cock while I lick your wife's pussy " or "let me be both your fuck toy" when alot of fella just message offering to "make your Mrs gag on my throat" "bury my load in her" " spit roast her with you" I'm not sure most fellas are really worried about a cuddle after.. |
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By *dwalu2Couple
over a year ago
Bristol |
"After looking posting on another thread regarding unicorns meeting couples, I’ve started to ponder about the different experiences for singles meeting couples.
There seems to be a huge difference of approach and mindset in regards to meeting guys and women, why do you think that is?
I agree with you somewhat. There can be a big difference. When inviting someone to join there is alot more emphasis on the lady being asked to join amd more effort put in than when a fella. But saying that, correct me if I'm wrong, how many unicorns message couples "i wanna ride your cock while I lick your wife's pussy " or "let me be both your fuck toy" when alot of fella just message offering to "make your Mrs gag on my throat" "bury my load in her" " spit roast her with you" I'm not sure most fellas are really worried about a cuddle after.. "
Well, we’ve had a couple of messages from women like that, but it certainly isn’t the norm.
And not unsurprisingly it didn’t lead anywhere either! |
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"In my experience 3 is always better with 3 single people, introducing FBs is fine but the moment it’s 2+1 there’s potential for drama and tears "
The one time we ever had any drama on a meet was when it was a single guy and his fb! We don't bring drama and neither have any of the couples we have met. Certain people just bring drama whether they are single or not
Kx |
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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago
All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest |
I've never shown interest in meeting couples as a single guy though i've had offers in the past.
I've always had the impression (perhaps erroneously) that i'd be a third wheel and would just be viewed as an accessory to fill out a fantasy. This is how prior messaging always came across. |
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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
"After looking posting on another thread regarding unicorns meeting couples, I’ve started to ponder about the different experiences for singles meeting couples.
There seems to be a huge difference of approach and mindset in regards to meeting guys and women, why do you think that is?
"
I appreciate what we are looking for is a bit different to most, as we are looking for people willing to fill the “toys and playthings” role in a BDSM type play session (just not a living fleshlight as that would leave us all disappointed!).
In our experience the differences in mindset have been that the women who reach out tend to be cautious when it comes to exploring their interests while the men who messaged tended to be more cavalier with their body.
However, how we approach or respond to people is still the same regardless of who they are, their experience or what they want to achieve. This usually includes elements of educating to ensure that people are risk aware as we want to ensure that people have a safe and enjoyable time with us. |
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"I've never shown interest in meeting couples as a single guy though i've had offers in the past.
I've always had the impression (perhaps erroneously) that i'd be a third wheel and would just be viewed as an accessory to fill out a fantasy. This is how prior messaging always came across."
You've just not got to know the right couples
Kx |
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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"I've never shown interest in meeting couples as a single guy though i've had offers in the past.
I've always had the impression (perhaps erroneously) that i'd be a third wheel and would just be viewed as an accessory to fill out a fantasy. This is how prior messaging always came across."
That’s understandable. I’ve had interactions like that in the past, where I’ve been expected to do the running and feed into their fantasy. Those are the ones that I walked away from.
There are some entitled couples out there |
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By *andVCouple
over a year ago
Doncaster |
"After looking posting on another thread regarding unicorns meeting couples, I’ve started to ponder about the different experiences for singles meeting couples.
There seems to be a huge difference of approach and mindset in regards to meeting guys and women, why do you think that is?
"
I Don't know the answer as It is something we haven't experienced yet (fingers crossed one day lol) with another woman, but I believe it generally is seen as a less vulnerable position for a man to put himself in than it would be for a woman, and that isn't me being sexist or at least hope it doesn't come across like that, but that is what I think it comes down too. |
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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"After looking posting on another thread regarding unicorns meeting couples, I’ve started to ponder about the different experiences for singles meeting couples.
There seems to be a huge difference of approach and mindset in regards to meeting guys and women, why do you think that is?
I Don't know the answer as It is something we haven't experienced yet (fingers crossed one day lol) with another woman, but I believe it generally is seen as a less vulnerable position for a man to put himself in than it would be for a woman, and that isn't me being sexist or at least hope it doesn't come across like that, but that is what I think it comes down too."
I’m not saying it’s sexist as there are levels of safeguarding to consider but I’m not sure if I agree that guys aren’t going to be in less danger, it’s just that they don’t consider the risks in the same way |
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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago
All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest |
"I've never shown interest in meeting couples as a single guy though i've had offers in the past.
I've always had the impression (perhaps erroneously) that i'd be a third wheel and would just be viewed as an accessory to fill out a fantasy. This is how prior messaging always came across.
You've just not got to know the right couples
Kx"
Perhaps!  |
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By *andVCouple
over a year ago
Doncaster |
"After looking posting on another thread regarding unicorns meeting couples, I’ve started to ponder about the different experiences for singles meeting couples.
There seems to be a huge difference of approach and mindset in regards to meeting guys and women, why do you think that is?
I Don't know the answer as It is something we haven't experienced yet (fingers crossed one day lol) with another woman, but I believe it generally is seen as a less vulnerable position for a man to put himself in than it would be for a woman, and that isn't me being sexist or at least hope it doesn't come across like that, but that is what I think it comes down too.
I’m not saying it’s sexist as there are levels of safeguarding to consider but I’m not sure if I agree that guys aren’t going to be in less danger, it’s just that they don’t consider the risks in the same way"
Tbh after reading some of the other responses I mite have misunderstood the question as it now looks like it was more performance related than why it is more common. Lol but yeah I don't disagree, whenever any of us meet strangers there is always a risk, It's just heightened if your the person meeting two people by yourself. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We could also turn this around and say that maybe some singles don't understand the dynamic of playing with couples and don't want to take the time to find out.
Kx"
Isn't it largely gonna be about the couple looking for someone to fulfil some kind of sexual fantasy though?
That can still be done with respect and hope that everyone involved enjoys it equally |
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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"We could also turn this around and say that maybe some singles don't understand the dynamic of playing with couples and don't want to take the time to find out.
Kx"
That’s very true as well.
I’ve seen it from both sides, as a couple and as a single. As a couple there were a lot of assumptions, ignorance and entitled behaviour from singles, so it’s not just one way. |
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"We could also turn this around and say that maybe some singles don't understand the dynamic of playing with couples and don't want to take the time to find out.
Kx
Isn't it largely gonna be about the couple looking for someone to fulfil some kind of sexual fantasy though?
That can still be done with respect and hope that everyone involved enjoys it equally "
Isn't this all about us trying to fulfil our fantasies? |
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"After looking posting on another thread regarding unicorns meeting couples, I’ve started to ponder about the different experiences for singles meeting couples.
There seems to be a huge difference of approach and mindset in regards to meeting guys and women, why do you think that is?
I agree with you somewhat. There can be a big difference. When inviting someone to join there is alot more emphasis on the lady being asked to join amd more effort put in than when a fella. But saying that, correct me if I'm wrong, how many unicorns message couples "i wanna ride your cock while I lick your wife's pussy " or "let me be both your fuck toy" when alot of fella just message offering to "make your Mrs gag on my throat" "bury my load in her" " spit roast her with you" I'm not sure most fellas are really worried about a cuddle after..
Well, we’ve had a couple of messages from women like that, but it certainly isn’t the norm.
And not unsurprisingly it didn’t lead anywhere either! "
I'm not actually that surprised. But it seems a bit like that. Not that I agree with that. For me the only way is if the 3 us actually get on as friends first. Then the rest follows. Rare combination but worth finding. |
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"I’ve also noticed how many women want to meet other women but won’t meet couples, is it that men are the issue in that situation?
I’m not pointing fingers here but I’m curious as to the thought process "
I don’t meet just women because I need a man to totally satisfy me so it’s important to me in couple situations that he’s allowed to fuck me too. |
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I have met one couple, and the sex was great - I didn't feel as though I was a third wheel, I felt as though we were all equal and it was lovely.
99% of the messages I get from couples accounts I feel as though I'm being asked to perform - I have been asked more than once if I'll put on a show with the female half of the couple as a gift for the male half.
It's a shame as it's a dynamic I'd like to explore, but I'm not prepared to be there as the entertainment without having my own needs met. |
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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"I have met one couple, and the sex was great - I didn't feel as though I was a third wheel, I felt as though we were all equal and it was lovely.
99% of the messages I get from couples accounts I feel as though I'm being asked to perform - I have been asked more than once if I'll put on a show with the female half of the couple as a gift for the male half.
It's a shame as it's a dynamic I'd like to explore, but I'm not prepared to be there as the entertainment without having my own needs met."
This seems to be a fairly common experience.
It never fails to amaze me the irony of calling single bi women unicorns, when they’re not rare, it’s just the actions of the ‘hunters’ that put them off |
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