FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Fab vs Real Life
Fab vs Real Life
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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What would happen if you applied the rules of fab in a real life in a bar setting.
You: Hi my name is ...
Woman: Are you verified?
You: Verified?
Woman: How do i know you're not fake.
You: I'm standing right in front of you, i can assure you i'm quite real.
Woman: I won't meet anyone who is less than 8 inches and athletic and isn't white and if you're bi.
You: What is wrong with you, i was just going to introduce myself...
Woman: Not my type, i've just blocked you.
You: You are aware i'm still in front of you.
Woman: Worst meet ever.
You: So the exit is that way, i'll see myself out.
Yeah that is a really sarcastic post, done in fun. Have a nice day everyone.xx |
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More like 100 guys shouting “wanna fuck” at every woman in the room
Then 1 guy with a thoughtful message that’s really tried, but she can’t hear him over the sea of shouting losers.
Followed by “men don’t make any effort in here” |
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"More like 100 guys shouting “wanna fuck” at every woman in the room
Then 1 guy with a thoughtful message that’s really tried, but she can’t hear him over the sea of shouting losers.
Followed by “men don’t make any effort in here”"
You forgot to mention the guys on the other side of the room who just wink at you 
N |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"*woman standing in bar*
Man: hi
Man: hi
Man: hi
*exposes dick*
Man: hi
Man: hi
Man: hi
Woman: sorry I’m not interested
Man: fucking fat slag
Man: hi
Man: hi
Man: hi"
 
|
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"More like 100 guys shouting “wanna fuck” at every woman in the room
Then 1 guy with a thoughtful message that’s really tried, but she can’t hear him over the sea of shouting losers.
Followed by “men don’t make any effort in here”
You forgot to mention the guys on the other side of the room who just wink at you
N"
And the ones on the other side just wanking |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"*woman standing in bar*
Man: hi
Man: hi
Man: hi
*exposes dick*
Man: hi
Man: hi
Man: hi
Woman: sorry I’m not interested
Man: fucking fat slag
Man: hi
Man: hi
Man: hi"
That's the one!
But obviously.... not all men. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Spend ages chatting to a couple and start to feel like there may be an opportunity to have some fun, nip to the loo and come back and find she was never there and he’s just a single guy having a wank under the table |
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"What would happen if you applied the rules of fab in a real life in a bar setting.
You: Hi my name is ...
Woman: Are you verified?
You: Verified?
Woman: How do i know you're not fake.
You: I'm standing right in front of you, i can assure you i'm quite real.
Woman: I won't meet anyone who is less than 8 inches and athletic and isn't white and if you're bi.
You: What is wrong with you, i was just going to introduce myself...
Woman: Not my type, i've just blocked you.
You: You are aware i'm still in front of you.
Woman: Worst meet ever.
You: So the exit is that way, i'll see myself out.
Yeah that is a really sarcastic post, done in fun. Have a nice day everyone.xx"
Brilliant can't stop howling. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Spend ages chatting to a couple and start to feel like there may be an opportunity to have some fun, nip to the loo and come back and find she was never there and he’s just a single guy having a wank under the table"
OMG this made me laugh so much |
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By *etro1940sCouple
over a year ago
Kingston upon Thames |
Very insightful post.
Real life: go to a swingers club, see people, chat, flirt, do some mutually accepted touching, get horny and then get the party started ... go home after 1 hour of flirtation and 2 hours of fucking, reclaim sex with husband.
Fab some days: log on, see messages, try to be polite and then just give up ... x Anne |
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"More like 100 guys shouting “wanna fuck” at every woman in the room
Then 1 guy with a thoughtful message that’s really tried, but she can’t hear him over the sea of shouting losers.
Followed by “men don’t make any effort in here”
You forgot to mention the guys on the other side of the room who just wink at you
N"
Was that a typo? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Blokes stood at the bar flinging Polaroids of there cocks at unsuspecting women 
Standard night for you isn't it?
Yeah I don't go on a night out without my folder of dick pics  "
Or a score card, I bet  |
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Meanwhile in another room people are sitting amicably in groups, chatting, listening to each other and making connections. They decided to move there having looked at the other room and discreetly approached the people they thought they'd enjoy chatting to and removing all the others from sight.
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Meanwhile in another room people are sitting amicably in groups, chatting, listening to each other and making connections. They decided to move there having looked at the other room and discreetly approached the people they thought they'd enjoy chatting to and removing all the others from sight.
"
Soooooo kik? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"*woman standing in bar*
Man: hi
Man: hi
Man: hi
*exposes dick*
Man: hi
Man: hi
Man: hi
Woman: sorry I’m not interested
Man: fucking fat slag
Man: hi
Man: hi
Man: hi"
Haha,not all of us are like that though,some of us are normal. |
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Brilliant thread ....forgot the bit ...
Male Hi
Couple Hi
Male Got any plans
Couple Nope
Male..............................................................................................................................
|
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"Meanwhile in another room people are sitting amicably in groups, chatting, listening to each other and making connections. They decided to move there having looked at the other room and discreetly approached the people they thought they'd enjoy chatting to and removing all the others from sight.
Soooooo kik? "
Oh! Lol no. I meant there are people who put filters on to avoid all the annoying messages, they can then chat in peace to the people they want .
Kik isn't allowed on the forum anyway . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"*woman standing in bar*
Man: hi
Man: hi
Man: hi
*exposes dick*
Man: hi
Man: hi
Man: hi
Woman: sorry I’m not interested
Man: fucking fat slag
Man: hi
Man: hi
Man: hi
That's the one!
But obviously.... not all men."
... Thank you NSP!.. |
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And the loudmouth crossdresser walks into the bar telling the dickpic guys to go fuck themselves and kicking the ones who get too close in the nuts.
Plonks herself between all of the gorgeous ladies at the bar and has a blast for the rest of the night while seeing the guys crying into their pints mumbling to themselves about how they're not the same as the other guys |
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By *etro1940sCouple
over a year ago
Kingston upon Thames |
"Meanwhile in another room people are sitting amicably in groups, chatting, listening to each other and making connections. They decided to move there having looked at the other room and discreetly approached the people they thought they'd enjoy chatting to and removing all the others from sight.
"
indeed xx A & G |
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Man: "Nice tits" whilst wanking
Woman: 
Man: "why are you even here if you don't want dick? fucking prick tease fat slag"
Woman: *wanders off to call a taxi and get home to the safety of her 4 walls* |
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"And the loudmouth crossdresser walks into the bar telling the dickpic guys to go fuck themselves and kicking the ones who get too close in the nuts.
Plonks herself between all of the gorgeous ladies at the bar and has a blast for the rest of the night while seeing the guys crying into their pints mumbling to themselves about how they're not the same as the other guys "
Howling  |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"And the loudmouth crossdresser walks into the bar telling the dickpic guys to go fuck themselves and kicking the ones who get too close in the nuts.
Plonks herself between all of the gorgeous ladies at the bar and has a blast for the rest of the night while seeing the guys crying into their pints mumbling to themselves about how they're not the same as the other guys "
You're always cock blocking me!
(Although "saving" is also a term I'd use) |
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"And the loudmouth crossdresser walks into the bar telling the dickpic guys to go fuck themselves and kicking the ones who get too close in the nuts.
Plonks herself between all of the gorgeous ladies at the bar and has a blast for the rest of the night while seeing the guys crying into their pints mumbling to themselves about how they're not the same as the other guys
You're always cock blocking me!
(Although "saving" is also a term I'd use)"
Sorry not sorry |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"And the loudmouth crossdresser walks into the bar telling the dickpic guys to go fuck themselves and kicking the ones who get too close in the nuts.
Plonks herself between all of the gorgeous ladies at the bar and has a blast for the rest of the night while seeing the guys crying into their pints mumbling to themselves about how they're not the same as the other guys
You're always cock blocking me!
(Although "saving" is also a term I'd use)
Sorry not sorry "
White knight  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I like this game...
Man: 'WOMBATGOOSE' or other random word that must be included in his opening sentence to prove that he already knows what she is looking for.
Man: Takes off sunglasses and hat (at ladies request). 'This is me'...
Woman: Thinks....and does one of the following:
a. Takes the bag off her head and starts talking.
b. Keeps the bag on her head but flirts and chats for the rest of the evening regardless.
c. Simultaneously combusts never to be seen again.
Man: 'nice lady, I would'
All said in fun. That has never happened to me.. well probably not.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"*woman standing in bar*
Man: hi
Man: hi
Man: hi
*exposes dick*
Man: hi
Man: hi
Man: hi
Woman: sorry I’m not interested
Man: fucking fat slag
Man: hi
Man: hi
Man: hi"
Hahahahaaa |
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Man. I'm CumdumpingWarrior from YourFantasyLand, I'm going to spin you around & start by licking your ears then move onto your neck, pushing my 9" hardness into you before dropping to my knees...
Woman.  |
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By *ast_jjMan
over a year ago
Dublin and London |
"Man. I'm CumdumpingWarrior from YourFantasyLand, I'm going to spin you around & start by licking your ears then move onto your neck, pushing my 9" hardness into you before dropping to my knees...
Woman. "
It was the profile name wasn't it? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"More like 100 guys shouting “wanna fuck” at every woman in the room
Then 1 guy with a thoughtful message that’s really tried, but she can’t hear him over the sea of shouting losers.
Followed by “men don’t make any effort in here”
You forgot to mention the guys on the other side of the room who just wink at you
N
And the ones on the other side just wanking "
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"*woman standing in bar*
Man: hi
Man: hi
Man: hi
*exposes dick*
Man: hi
Man: hi
Man: hi
Woman: sorry I’m not interested
Man: fucking fat slag
Man: hi
Man: hi
Man: hi"
roll accurate x |
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Man in a tailored suit walks into Weatherspoons, heads to bar slowly undoing his belt...
Fem 1: Oh sweet Jesus, he's in a suit!
Fem 2: *drools He's got a belt too! A fucking leather one!
Fem 1: UNDO YOUR SHIRT! UNDO IT!
Fem 2: TIGHT WHITIES! TIGHT WHITIES WE NEED THEM NOW!
Man shifts awkwardly, loosening shirt, leaning on bar, attempts 'the look'
Fem 1: Oh look there's another one.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I like this game...
Man: 'WOMBATGOOSE' or other random word that must be included in his opening sentence to prove that he already knows what she is looking for.
Man: Takes off sunglasses and hat (at ladies request). 'This is me'...
Woman: Thinks....and does one of the following:
a. Takes the bag off her head and starts talking.
b. Keeps the bag on her head but flirts and chats for the rest of the evening regardless.
c. Simultaneously combusts never to be seen again.
Man: 'nice lady, I would'
All said in fun. That has never happened to me.. well probably not.
"
Keeps the bag on her head! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Man: nice arsehole
Woman: um, thanks
Man: bet you're a dirty slag aren't you
Woman:
Man: wanna come over right this minute for bareback sex?
Woman: no thanks
Man: you're such a fucking tease, why did you reply then? Fucking bitch, you're clearly a time wasting fake
Woman: block. And sigh.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Man: nice arsehole
Woman: um, thanks
Man: bet you're a dirty slag aren't you
Woman:
Man: wanna come over right this minute for bareback sex?
Woman: no thanks
Man: you're such a fucking tease, why did you reply then? Fucking bitch, you're clearly a time wasting fake
Woman: block. And sigh.
"
They really send shit like that ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Man: nice arsehole
Woman: um, thanks
Man: bet you're a dirty slag aren't you
Woman:
Man: wanna come over right this minute for bareback sex?
Woman: no thanks
Man: you're such a fucking tease, why did you reply then? Fucking bitch, you're clearly a time wasting fake
Woman: block. And sigh.
They really send shit like that ? "
Yes, not you, but yes. That's why you get replies |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Man: nice arsehole
Woman: um, thanks
Man: bet you're a dirty slag aren't you
Woman:
Man: wanna come over right this minute for bareback sex?
Woman: no thanks
Man: you're such a fucking tease, why did you reply then? Fucking bitch, you're clearly a time wasting fake
Woman: block. And sigh.
They really send shit like that ?
Yes, not you, but yes. That's why you get replies "
Same for you ... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I'll have a pint in a quiet corner of the pub and give random people the thumbs up if I like what I see.
Only if they've arrived completely nude though and doing unspeakable things to each other.
I might even place random items next to my todger to compare.
I'll also be the one with no head, feet and just one arm.
Cheers! Bollocks! No mouth! |
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"I'll have a pint in a quiet corner of the pub and give random people the thumbs up if I like what I see.
Only if they've arrived completely nude though and doing unspeakable things to each other.
I might even place random items next to my todger to compare.
I'll also be the one with no head, feet and just one arm.
Cheers! Bollocks! No mouth! "
|
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By *lipy123TV/TS
over a year ago
Birmingham |
Guy walks up to CD
Man; god your gorgeous
CD; thank you dear
Man; would love to play with you, you look soo sexy
CD; really can you accommodate ?
Man; yes anytime you want ( beads of sweat on his brow )
Cd; how about now ? i'm feeling a little
Man seen running out the bar scared faster then speed of light
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