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The do's and don't's of constructing a first message
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Start with "Hello". Hardly anybody does this. It's just basic.
Another basic is use their name! All profiles require some form of name. It might be the username or in the profile above their basic info. Often it's shortened to a letter, but there is something there you can use.
If somebody send us a message saying "Hello, Luke and Hannah", there is a very high chance we would reply. It shows they are not carpet-bombing messages. It shows they have a degree of respect. As long as they don't then write a faf message or something similarly vapid, they would almost certainly get a response from us.
Why are these simple things so rare on Fab? |
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"Start with "Hello". Hardly anybody does this. It's just basic.
Another basic is use their name! All profiles require some form of name. It might be the username or in the profile above their basic info. Often it's shortened to a letter, but there is something there you can use.
If somebody send us a message saying "Hello, Luke and Hannah", there is a very high chance we would reply. It shows they are not carpet-bombing messages. It shows they have a degree of respect. As long as they don't then write a faf message or something similarly vapid, they would almost certainly get a response from us.
Why are these simple things so rare on Fab?"
Good points that I'm guilty of my self! |
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"Start with "Hello". Hardly anybody does this. It's just basic.
Another basic is use their name! All profiles require some form of name. It might be the username or in the profile above their basic info. Often it's shortened to a letter, but there is something there you can use.
If somebody send us a message saying "Hello, Luke and Hannah", there is a very high chance we would reply. It shows they are not carpet-bombing messages. It shows they have a degree of respect. As long as they don't then write a faf message or something similarly vapid, they would almost certainly get a response from us.
Why are these simple things so rare on Fab?"
I always address messages to the profile name, but still don't often get replies. Guess I'm going wrong with the actual content of the message.
Either that or they don't like the look of me when they check me out in return. Which is arguably fair comment.... |
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Don't think it makes any real difference. You can construct the best, most personalised, natural message, it will still likely be left unread.
With 100000000000:1 men to women you need to find another way to engage, like through forums.
I'd be very interested to hear from the small percentage of guys who get any sort of reply from a first message. I don't know what the secret is but what gets them the reply is definitely not the content of their message... |
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It can be a real lottery, what may pique one couples interest may not pique another’s.
Generally a bit of effort to show that you’ve read the profile and a couple of pics go a long way, the rest is up to the recipient and how appealing you are I suppose?
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I think that once you have followed the good advice already offered it becomes the luck of the draw. It has to be remembered that any lady or couple may receive hundreds of messages per day and it would be unrealistic to expect them to reply to them all even to say "no thanks". To be fair if I have spent half an hour on a message quite a few recipients will acknowledge the message. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Don't think it makes any real difference. You can construct the best, most personalised, natural message, it will still likely be left unread.
With 100000000000:1 men to women you need to find another way to engage, like through forums.
I'd be very interested to hear from the small percentage of guys who get any sort of reply from a first message. I don't know what the secret is but what gets them the reply is definitely not the content of their message... "
I’m a guy who gets replies to my first messages. Sometimes they’re telling me I’m not for them  I appreciate that though.
As you say even the most personalised message can not get a reply. Some users have too many messages to reply to, some many not have the time or some may not even be in the mood.
I certainly have days I can’t be arsed to reply to messages and I usually find the people I chat with don’t mind time in between messaging.
I think guys get really focused on “why have they not replied!” and it would be better to just accept it for what it is, which is no response. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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This is not directed at the OP but just some similar types of threads.
I hate it when I see guys asking for ways to get a response and are using language that makes fab users sound like secret codes they need to crack or assignments they need to score top marks in. Breaking down messages in to structures and marking criteria.
If someone said no thanks to your face would you go home thinking of how you could alter every interaction or fake interest in things just to get someone to reply to you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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For me, a first message thats not too long, but not 1 line either.
You can spot copy and paste messages a mile away.
Maybe add some context to the message, such as something that's relevant to the person you're messaging. Obviously this requires reading the page and not just drooling over the pics.
Thats my 2 pence worth anyway |
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