 |
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Throw in the best joke you’ve heard or have
My favourite is: Have you heard about the new viagra eye drops?
They don’t do fuck all for your knob but they make you look hard  "
think thats my favorate new joke |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Throw in the best joke you’ve heard or have
My favourite is: Have you heard about the new viagra eye drops?
They don’t do fuck all for your knob but they make you look hard
think thats my favorate new joke"
haha use it x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *lair101TV/TS
over a year ago
Aberdeen, westhill |
The other night my girlfriend and I are in bed together. She says, 'Anthony, I want you to pee on me.' Now I have never thought about peeing on a woman in my entire life. Never even imagined it before but then I got the green light and apparently, it's my thing. I just jumped up right away. But as soon as that begins she starts screaming at me; like it's my fault she talks in her sleep.
– Anthony Jeselnik |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I was eating my lunch in a cafe the other day when I found something on my plate. I said to the cafe owner,
"oi, there's a worm in my meat pie!". He said "that's fat". I said " it's entitled to be, it's eaten all the fucking meat!". |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I was eating my lunch in a cafe the other day when I found something on my plate. I said to the cafe owner,
"oi, there's a worm in my meat pie!". He said "that's fat". I said " it's entitled to be, it's eaten all the fucking meat!". "
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I accidentally drank a bottle of invisible ink last night.
Currently in A&E waiting to be seen.
My American friend said to me the other day “have you ever been abroad”?
I answered “No I’ve always been a bloke”
Well in my case I wasn’t exactly honest x
Just bought a horse a thorough bred.
My mate asked “what you going to do with it”?
Race it I said,
He responded “My monies on the horse “ |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
The pope was in Liverpool blessing people who had queued up to see him. He got a teenage boy and said “how can I help you my my child?”
The lad replied “I need help with my hearing”
So the pope placed a hand on each of the lads ears, said a prayer, looked to the sky and kissed the lads forehead.
“How is your hearing now?” Asked the pope.
“I don’t know, it’s not until next Wednesday” replied the lad |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Throw in the best joke you’ve heard or have
My favourite is: Have you heard about the new viagra eye drops?
They don’t do fuck all for your knob but they make you look hard "
I once swallowed a viagra by mistake, my neck was stiff for hours |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Why did the pervert cross the road?"
Because he had his dick stuck in the chicken
I know no one asked, but I felt the need to tell you all anyway.... 
*Drops mic, exits stage left to the sound of his own footsteps* |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Dear God..I got into David Bowie and you took him away from me.
Dear God..I got into Aretha Franklin and you took her away from me.
Dear God..I got into Amy Winehouse and you took her away from me.
Just to let you know God...I'm now into Justin Bieber. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
"Dear God..I got into David Bowie and you took him away from me.
Dear God..I got into Aretha Franklin and you took her away from me.
Dear God..I got into Amy Winehouse and you took her away from me.
Just to let you know God...I'm now into Justin Bieber."
Hes staying |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Dear God..I got into David Bowie and you took him away from me.
Dear God..I got into Aretha Franklin and you took her away from me.
Dear God..I got into Amy Winehouse and you took her away from me.
Just to let you know God...I'm now into Justin Bieber.
Hes staying "
We can mourn him together. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
"Dear God..I got into David Bowie and you took him away from me.
Dear God..I got into Aretha Franklin and you took her away from me.
Dear God..I got into Amy Winehouse and you took her away from me.
Just to let you know God...I'm now into Justin Bieber.
Hes staying
We can mourn him together. "
Noooo
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
