FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > What did you expect when you joined FabSwingers?
What did you expect when you joined FabSwingers?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I see so many status updates about how difficult it is to get sex on here or threads about having more success on dating apps or at the pub, so i ask what did you expect when you joined FabSwingers?
Ive seen it said couples are true swingers and single people have no business on here. Is that part of the problem?
What say y’all?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hoping to find someone as open minded as I am.
Simple really.
Started off as a couple, then split up and came back as a single (I'm one of those 'shouldn't be here' types  ) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I expected to be flat on my back with a queue of women waiting for some fun!
Seriously though, I didn't expect to stay for very long, as I thought no one would be interested in me, but five plus years later and I'm still here.
I've had some incredible experiences over the years and made some great friends!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I never really expected to enjoy posting photos so much, I was quite shy about showing my body off before fab. Guess it's brought out my inner exhibitionist!
I've really enjoyed being here, even if most of it has been through lockdown! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not sure what my expectations were. Having no time for a full on relationship and being a sociophobe this kind of suited me
Fab gave me sexual confidence and has broken down barriers with people I would not have ever encountered otherwise. Have met some incredible people and made some great friends on the scene and gave me the confidence to explore clubs
Still in contact with the first guy I met on Fab and stayed friends with a few others.
Not saying there hasn't been dark moments but you learn from it and grow. So yup overall a positive experience |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
I have no idea. I had no expectations and still don't know what I'm looking for.
But as a single I apparently shouldn't be here either.
Dammit. I'd just got my profile how I like it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was open minded and curious - didn't have many preconceptions. Ive been able to have a coffee with a couple of strangers and enjoy (mostly) the forums |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I suppose I had an odd introduction to fab (story for another time) so I didn’t really know what to expect when I signed up. But it’s really opened my eyes to what is out there and what I really like sexually. I’m definitely glad I joined  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was still married and looking for women, I’m no longer married and I prefer men.
I also didn’t realise how much I’d enjoy taking and posting pics, and it even led to a bit of modelling last year too. I would not have had the confidence for that pre fab. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I was still married and looking for women, I’m no longer married and I prefer men.
I also didn’t realise how much I’d enjoy taking and posting pics, and it even led to a bit of modelling last year too. I would not have had the confidence for that pre fab."
You should be full to the brim with confidence, you sexy stunning woman! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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With impeccable timing I joined on impulse during lockdown so had very few expectations. I've found it to be a very positive experience and the Forum frolics have definitely made lockdown days pass a little easier. |
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I only joined to contact someone who had let me down in a big way and then blocked me on all other social media.
I had no expectations and wasn't planning on staying.
I am still here 2 years later. Made some really good friends and met a few great play partners.
Fab is what you make of it but too many think it's a place to get easy sex whenever they want it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I wasn't new to swinging so I knew what to expect.
I didn't expect to still be here 9 years later and mostly talking bollocks on the forum instead of shagging  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I was still married and looking for women, I’m no longer married and I prefer men.
I also didn’t realise how much I’d enjoy taking and posting pics, and it even led to a bit of modelling last year too. I would not have had the confidence for that pre fab.
You should be full to the brim with confidence, you sexy stunning woman!"
Right back at you |
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By *irginieWoman
over a year ago
Near Marlborough |
I expected uncomplicated sex
What I got was love, friendship clubs, parties, dressing up, heartbreak, nights out laughing and dancing, fun and excitement and a whole new life on the side.
V x |
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"I expected uncomplicated sex
What I got was love, friendship clubs, parties, dressing up, heartbreak, nights out laughing and dancing, fun and excitement and a whole new life on the side.
V x "
Sounds (mostly) wonderful! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Non vanilla and non biphobic folks.
A little disappointed in recent times as fans doesn't really seem to be about swinging anymore, just a quick shag and there's a fair bit of male biphobia too. |
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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago
Newcastle |
I didn't expect anything unusual but I didn't know much about the swinging lifestyle now it's not unusual but interesting I'm not alone as a twisted fruit loop with a hunger and thirst with similar sexual desires |
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I was guided here from a conversation on PoF where I found the men wanted nsa sex without saying so. When I changed my profile to looking for nsa they ran a mile
I didn’t expect much to be honest & was very overwhelmed when I 1st joined as men seem to pounce on new single female profiles even with no photos.
I think I was lucky in that a local man from a couple made contact & offered to take some photos for me. He was lovely, took my early pics & gave me some great advice & so did his wife. There was no physical contact either which really put me at ease.
I eventually started reading then braved posting in the forums. Met a few lovely forumites, had some amazing fun 
Then I met T via a thread on prosecco nearly 6 years ago & we’ve been married for over 2 years.
J x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I was guided here from a conversation on PoF where I found the men wanted nsa sex without saying so. When I changed my profile to looking for nsa they ran a mile
I didn’t expect much to be honest & was very overwhelmed when I 1st joined as men seem to pounce on new single female profiles even with no photos.
I think I was lucky in that a local man from a couple made contact & offered to take some photos for me. He was lovely, took my early pics & gave me some great advice & so did his wife. There was no physical contact either which really put me at ease.
I eventually started reading then braved posting in the forums. Met a few lovely forumites, had some amazing fun
Then I met T via a thread on prosecco nearly 6 years ago & we’ve been married for over 2 years.
J x"
This is a lovely story  |
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I was talking about this just the other day.
I was in a stale long term relationship and I had a fantasy of cheating. I was never going to cheat, but it was just the idea that turned me on.
I went through a couple of “benefit” sites when I discovered fab. I was hooked! I told my partner about it and we both decided to give it a try.
At first we enjoyed it, it really put life back into the relationship, we met a few couples and went to our local club (TH). Eventually the swinging stopped cause we got pregnant and the relationship was great once again.
Now, over 15 years later, I’m single, and back on here. |
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By *ubal1Man
over a year ago
Newry Down |
I had no expectations whatsoever; I had been on another site which proved to be very disappointing and left that.
I have played this one much more cautiously and the pandemic hasn't helped.
I have not yet uploaded any publicly available pics, but when society opens up again, my stance will be significantly less passive.
Fabswingers is one of many strings to my bow, that I intend to move up several notches by the end of this year; I am not optimistic about the pandemic nor the possibility of further lockdowns.
Covid is going to rage exponentially through Asia, Africa, South America and parts of Europe for a considerable period and mutations will proliferate.
Despite assurances, there may be significant cross contamination back into the UK and Ireland.
From discussions with medical personnel, I am fairly certain I had Covid symptoms last year; I do not want to be reinfected with a mutation.
In the meantime the forums will be sole focus.
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As with anything new, I tried to come to Fab with no expectations.
What I *hoped*, though, was that this, finally, would be the website where I found people whose attitudes to sex finally matched my own.
I have been roundly disappointed.
I am still here because a better option is yet to present itself.
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By *indergirlWoman
over a year ago
somewhere, someplace |
Fab wasn't new to me, I was on here with an ex eons ago in my mid 20's.
I came back as a single to explore myself and what I like more sexually.... But lockdown has put that on the back burner. |
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By *azpiz1Man
over a year ago
Camberley |
I dipped my toe into the Swinging lifestyle by attending a swingers club - I was (and still am!) Fascinated by the attitude of people towards sex, after being in a passionless and sexless marriage for many years.
I was hooked. I found out about Fabswingers, and couldn't wait to join.
I've met some lovely people - not necessarily played with many, but I love being able to talk so openly about sexual subjects, and the possibility that it might turn into more...
I have had some success on "normal" dating sites, but that has been with women looking for something casual, rather than being part of the lifestyle - they haven't wanted to go to parties, clubs, or share / swap, which I have respected.
I'd love to find someone who IS in the lifestyle, but what with Covid, I'm not sure how that might happen - I think people will be even more cautious of meeting single guys than they were before. |
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As a single guy and non-english was a bit weird for me !
It's not that I don't know english it's just some flirts or jokes are different from where I come from!
But since this website it's not about racism I found really nice people here and so many beautiful and super gorgeous ladies here which may I add that got me thinking what a lucky guys we are !
Plus the forums quite funny with all the games sometimes we play or telling jokes!
Thank you guys for being you!
And because the question is about what we expected to receive...the answer is to meet dirty people and super chill  |
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I joined with an open mind 4 yrs ago when hearing about it from a nice couple from another site. Although only properly being on here start of pandemic lst yr with intentions of visiting clubs to have it crushed with lockdown rules and a sister who doesn’t understand what I’m exploring (long story)
To then think am I doing the right thing, not having anyone in my life to talk to about this has been tough, no need for the volins () it’s given me the chance to explore my body’s ability to squirt which I’ve never done before (slowly getting the hang of it) yep very sheltered life!! To not know what my body likes (very frustrating) I’m slowly realising I need...no I crave something more than just vanilla.
Still a novice to this world and don’t fully understand where I fit into it all but I do know this site has given me the freedom to explore/discover this side of me.
As for the singles having no business on here?! I’d say yes they do. Couples who have been in the lifestyle for yrs maybe are true swingers but even they need to look for singles to join them. Just happens this day in age their are immature males (no offence to genuine ones) who are taking advantage of such sites to just get laid which is a shame but those experienced enough can sniff them out a mile away.
Interesting topic OP hoping I haven’t baffled your brain or offended anyone at my reply not my intention 
Happy fabbing everyone xx |
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Having tried other sites and found them useless, I expected it to be crap and to get no interest. I was proved wrong about the “no interest” inside 10 minutes, to the point that it nearly scared me straight back off the site.
I hoped for no strings casual 1 to 1 sex, which I found was very easy to get, but I quickly learned there was a lot more to it than that, and it wasn’t long before I stopped wanting that and started wanting a select few single friends and more focus on three- or more-somes.
I barely dared to dream that I might get to meet a woman, but that turned out to be possible too.
I signed up thinking it was a hook-up site, and found some amazing friends who are now an important part of my life and hopefully always will be. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hmmm its a really good Q.. I expected to find a Dom, who was local to me, that i could see regularly... I didn't find this
I didn't expect to find self fulfillment, inner confidence, go for work promotions and generally be a better, calmer, more open, receptive person.. It also opened my mind and allowed me to explore things i wouldn't have considered previously
I also have come to love bits of my body and see myself through others lenses and realise that my vanilla life hangups don't matter one iota
I didn't expect to find someone that i would adore.. Maybe even my soul mate
I love Fab, it has enriched my life in ways that i couldn't have envisaged and you and your experiences are all part of that growth  |
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By *dwalu2Couple
over a year ago
Bristol |
We joined up and didn’t even put any pictures on for about a year as we forgot about Fab. Then one day we were talking about meeting a woman so added some pics, added ourselves to the Meets section, a lovely woman messaged us, we both liked her...and we met her in the flesh the next day, for what became an incredible threesome!
Obviously that gave us a very skewed idea of what to expect in terms of meeting women through Fab. Certainly our expectations became more realistic over time!
The story of that first meet is linked to at the end of our profile, it’s in Stories & Fantasies...re-reading it, it’s incredible to think we got so lucky on our first meet so easily. |
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By *renzMan
over a year ago
Between Chichester and Havant |
What did I expect when I joined fab? Absolutely no expectations whatsoever.
Having used freeads and contact magazines prior to the internet I knew the percentages of meeting were low. The only advantage was, I didn't have to wait so long for a reply. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was on here a few years ago and had some very naughty good fun..... I think Covids took the toll on here that it had in real life and peeps are dubious about meetings...... I hoped to have a similar experience to last time.... xxxxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I expected nothing. Obviously hoped for something. Was just me. Polite. Attempted to be amusing. Didn’t use any dick pics. And to be honest never really struggled. Perhaps it was easier back then. I dunno. It wasn’t like it was the be all and end all. And it was never about trying to fuck as many people as possible.
J |
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To be honest I only joined fab to chat to people I had met at clubs. I had no intention of doing 1 to 1 meets but soon gave into temptation. I posted very mild pics at first and avoided the forums but all has changed now. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We joined to find like minded people..
find out the best clubs and parties..
We have met some amazing people and also made some very special friends .. including single males and females  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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For me I expected to meet like minded people who enjoy the same as me didn't realise there was so much competition (or as many "stright" guys who want to meet men) but I'm not gona spit my dummy out coz a girl doesn't reply or want to meet ill be honest I did get more action on tinder but I enjoy the pics and forums on here |
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By *lipy123TV/TS
over a year ago
Birmingham |
I expected nothing because if you expect nothing to happen and something does it's a bonus
I have changed since joining i think some of it can be blamed on lockdown as i have had time to evolve into something else as you can see. Has it been fun ? on and off yes x |
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I was introduced to Fab by the first lady I met after a very long stale marriage. When that relationship ended I decided to go it alone.
I’ve gone on to meet a number of people who have have become a significant part of my life.
Fab’s been very good to me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Well in Covid year it wasn't meeting someone.
Just to make a connection with like minded people, who weren't afraid of sex, kink and fetishism. Freedom.
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Looked for new friends, mostly non sexually, but there are some good folk on here but does seem to very very cliquey and if you do try and introduce yourself and say hi and get no response, I kinda feel that is rude. A simple no thank you would not affend me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Looked for new friends, mostly non sexually, but there are some good folk on here but does seem to very very cliquey and if you do try and introduce yourself and say hi and get no response, I kinda feel that is rude. A simple no thank you would not affend me. "
Agree with most. Just understand more couples and especially single women gets loads of trash to sort through. Forgive them not always replying. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thing I never expected was how far women and couples are up there own arse. Even the ugly ones that can't pull outside fab world"
As long as you’re having fun, that’s the main thing |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thing I never expected was how far women and couples are up there own arse. Even the ugly ones that can't pull outside fab world"
I'm hideous but get offers all the time. Says a lot about the desperate men.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I didn’t really have expectations as such as I knew what I was joining however now rona is on the decline and some normality is coming back I hope to meet some lovely ladies/women and see how things progress (or not) and gain more club/party experiences but as a single chap I still don’t have high expectations |
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"Thing I never expected was how far women and couples are up there own arse. Even the ugly ones that can't pull outside fab world
I'm hideous but get offers all the time. Says a lot about the desperate men. "
Having meat pie as profile pic. Makes me think you've eaten too many not for me thanks  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thing I never expected was how far women and couples are up there own arse. Even the ugly ones that can't pull outside fab world
I'm hideous but get offers all the time. Says a lot about the desperate men.
Having meat pie as profile pic. Makes me think you've eaten too many not for me thanks "
Aww I'm gutted.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thing I never expected was how far women and couples are up there own arse. Even the ugly ones that can't pull outside fab world"
You still message those women tho, eh?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thing I never expected was how far women and couples are up there own arse. Even the ugly ones that can't pull outside fab world
I'm hideous but get offers all the time. Says a lot about the desperate men.
Having meat pie as profile pic. Makes me think you've eaten too many not for me thanks
Aww I'm gutted. "
Stay strong, I know you won’t find anyone as charming but maybe you find someone who loves your meat pie. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thing I never expected was how far women and couples are up there own arse. Even the ugly ones that can't pull outside fab world
I'm hideous but get offers all the time. Says a lot about the desperate men.
Having meat pie as profile pic. Makes me think you've eaten too many not for me thanks
Aww I'm gutted.
Stay strong, I know you won’t find anyone as charming but maybe you find someone who loves your meat pie. "
It's fish pie. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thing I never expected was how far women and couples are up there own arse. Even the ugly ones that can't pull outside fab world"
Wow! And with that pic and profile you'd think they would be gagging for it.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thing I never expected was how far women and couples are up there own arse. Even the ugly ones that can't pull outside fab world
I'm hideous but get offers all the time. Says a lot about the desperate men.
Having meat pie as profile pic. Makes me think you've eaten too many not for me thanks
Aww I'm gutted.
Stay strong, I know you won’t find anyone as charming but maybe you find someone who loves your meat pie.
It's fish pie. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thing I never expected was how far women and couples are up there own arse. Even the ugly ones that can't pull outside fab world
I'm hideous but get offers all the time. Says a lot about the desperate men.
Having meat pie as profile pic. Makes me think you've eaten too many not for me thanks
Aww I'm gutted.
Stay strong, I know you won’t find anyone as charming but maybe you find someone who loves your meat pie.
It's fish pie. "
If it was I'd smell it from here |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thing I never expected was how far women and couples are up there own arse. Even the ugly ones that can't pull outside fab world
I'm hideous but get offers all the time. Says a lot about the desperate men.
Having meat pie as profile pic. Makes me think you've eaten too many not for me thanks
Aww I'm gutted.
Stay strong, I know you won’t find anyone as charming but maybe you find someone who loves your meat pie.
It's fish pie. "
Hope I haven’t hurt your eelings |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I was hoping to find my muse and life partner, what I found however is that I’ve got a new piano based playlist to run to,
Need more? I'm bountiful in such recommendations "
Yes please, suggestions welcome! |
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"Thing I never expected was how far women and couples are up there own arse. Even the ugly ones that can't pull outside fab world"
I never expected how faceless men would be so bitter about not getting drowned in meets |
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I didn't expect it to be as hard as it would be to chat to or meet people but I'm glad I stuck with it as I've enjoyed the forums and even uploading pictures when I never used to take photos of myself before I joined here. Definitely helped a lot with my confidence |
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"I didn't expect it to be as hard as it would be to chat to or meet people but I'm glad I stuck with it as I've enjoyed the forums and even uploading pictures when I never used to take photos of myself before I joined here. Definitely helped a lot with my confidence "
The pics are on point friend |
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By *indergirlWoman
over a year ago
somewhere, someplace |
"I didn't expect it to be as hard as it would be to chat to or meet people but I'm glad I stuck with it as I've enjoyed the forums and even uploading pictures when I never used to take photos of myself before I joined here. Definitely helped a lot with my confidence "
Agree with that one, my confidence has grown x |
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What i look for states in my profile and Fabs really surprised me since i joined. I had great amazing experiences with amazing lovely people whi i call them real friends and friends i real trust and vice versa . To me the concept of swinger is not only about sex but also building friendship, and fabs really allows me to know people with same connection chemestry and atraction where we all feel comfortable with the presence of each others and share great moments to become amzing memories.
About found a partner in crime is something is been in my head since few months ago due this all lockdown situation, as i live alone made feel how important is having someone to listen to chat to snug this all beautiful things couples they do , i realized sometimes is really hard feel alone! I may or may i not found someone to share with, this beautifu life style that is swingers but definitely Fabs have succeed my expectations so far because this site is full of beautiful people inside and outside people in all colors shapes and genders |
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"I didn't expect it to be as hard as it would be to chat to or meet people but I'm glad I stuck with it as I've enjoyed the forums and even uploading pictures when I never used to take photos of myself before I joined here. Definitely helped a lot with my confidence
The pics are on point friend "
Thank you, I like to think I've gotten better at them over time |
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By *an4funMan
over a year ago
london |
"I see so many status updates about how difficult it is to get sex on here or threads about having more success on dating apps or at the pub, so i ask what did you expect when you joined FabSwingers?
Ive seen it said couples are true swingers and single people have no business on here. Is that part of the problem?
What say y’all?
"
I joined fab after using other such sites for many years prior to joining fab so I knew what to expect and how it all works for single guys. It was also setup as an experiment to compare with the other sites I was on |
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"I didn't expect it to be as hard as it would be to chat to or meet people but I'm glad I stuck with it as I've enjoyed the forums and even uploading pictures when I never used to take photos of myself before I joined here. Definitely helped a lot with my confidence
Agree with that one, my confidence has grown x"
It's brilliant, isn't it? The confidence can come from compliments or even just seeing that despite what you think, you actually do have good angles |
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"Thing I never expected was how far women and couples are up there own arse. Even the ugly ones that can't pull outside fab world
I never expected how faceless men would be so bitter about not getting drowned in meets "
Thing is I've had plenty meets. And I never said I was bitter tut tut never presume and never try be clever when you don't know typical woman |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thing I never expected was how far women and couples are up there own arse. Even the ugly ones that can't pull outside fab world
I never expected how faceless men would be so bitter about not getting drowned in meets
Thing is I've had plenty meets. And I never said I was bitter tut tut never presume and never try be clever when you don't know typical woman "
Yes, because an impression of someone is based on what they tell you they are like. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thing I never expected was how far women and couples are up there own arse. Even the ugly ones that can't pull outside fab world
I never expected how faceless men would be so bitter about not getting drowned in meets
Thing is I've had plenty meets. And I never said I was bitter tut tut never presume and never try be clever when you don't know typical woman
Yes, because an impression of someone is based on what they tell you they are like."
I judge people on their punctuation or lack thereof |
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"Thing I never expected was how far women and couples are up there own arse. Even the ugly ones that can't pull outside fab world
I never expected how faceless men would be so bitter about not getting drowned in meets
Thing is I've had plenty meets. And I never said I was bitter tut tut never presume and never try be clever when you don't know typical woman "
Wasn't being clever, I was being sarcastic |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I expected to get my knob sucked by random strangers and indeed my knob was sucked by random strangers, plenty of them too
Then I found the forums and realised I didn't want my knob sucking as much as I thought I did
It was much less effort to sit and chat shit all evening than it was to chase tail
So, here I am, eleven years in, the blowjobs are a historic blur, the chatting shit is still great |
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By *os19Man
over a year ago
Edmonton |
I think I first joined 2006 with just a face picture and a couple of small paragraphs on my profile. I was expecting / hoping to find out about local clubs and parties that I could attend I was a bit disappointed that there wasn’t that much in London. I was also hoping to meet single ladies or couples fairly local to me and again I didn’t get much success.Looking back on it now I think not having a PC and going into a Internet cafe for a couple of hours a couple days a week was always going to be up against it with regards to finding a single lady or couples. |
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"To meet open minded and non judgmental people, who realise that life isn't a rehearsal. X "
Exactly this but to no avail...i guess we are all to judgemental..it would be nice to chat with some like minded people...its good to talk |
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I thought it was all about wife swapping, car keys in a bowl type thing. Realised that finding 2 people (ie a couple) that we liked was harder than just finding a bloke for the good lady so just looked for guys.
Then realised all the guys were knobheads and gave up! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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not all guys are knobheads we all want the same has everyone else on here good fun and hopefully to meet nice like minded people but it seems all single guys have been branded, |
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I (Luke) first joined after I went to a club on my own and some people I chatted with recommended that I sign up. I hadn't heard of it before that. I only expected to keep in touch with people I met in person at clubs, and it worked very well for that.
Before setting up a couple's profile with Hannah, I never really thought of trying to initiate contact with anybody through Fab. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think most men sign up and have this idea of being bombarded with messages for meeting or camming with stunning females or couples.
Reality is the sites got far too many males to couples or females ratio, far too many fakes or timewasters which has made it very difficult for males to get replies or meets. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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usually when a woman first joins the site she's unindated with messages , this is where it comes down to choice for the female with some men begging for her attention , it sometimes then goes to her head. cos most men just want to meet for a fuck pardon the pun which in turn then spoils it for the genuine guys who are seeking more than that. |
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By *wentMan
over a year ago
blackpool |
"I expected nothing and got notithing.
So, I got exactly what I expected "
I hoped to build a community I could join in with, meet new friends.I feel quite a shy person , so
Not easy to
Meet new friends.
Didn’t expect anything. |
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