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Having kids...
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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At 23, I was like I have plenty of time till 30 so I can wait, as I also didn't want to be an old dad.
But now that I'm almost 27, I'm thinking I'll wait to 35 and just get a wifey that's like 5 years younger |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"At 23, I was like I have plenty of time till 30 so I can wait, as I also didn't want to be an old dad.
But now that I'm almost 27, I'm thinking I'll wait to 35 and just get a wifey that's like 5 years younger "
The responsibilities of parenthood obviously burden you very deeply. |
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Morningstar, my Dad was 47 when I was born (his first child) and 49, nearly 50 when my brother was born. It's do-able. It should be said that my mother is 20yrs younger than him (they divorced, but that's not important here!) |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't worry so much about it. Especially as you're a guy. "
But I don't want to be an old dad! By the way I'm not trying to take away the fact it's the ladies that are taking all the risk associated with pregnancy. |
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"I wouldn't worry so much about it. Especially as you're a guy.
But I don't want to be an old dad! By the way I'm not trying to take away the fact it's the ladies that are taking all the risk associated with pregnancy."
Why? Wouldn't you rather be a prepared dad with the right mum? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"The most important thing is that you have kids with the right person, for the right reasons, far more important than age or anything else."
I know, but my age is really creeping up on me like crazy
I was at uni yesterday it feels like! |
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By *indergirlWoman
over a year ago
somewhere, someplace |
"The most important thing is that you have kids with the right person, for the right reasons, far more important than age or anything else.
I know, but my age is really creeping up on me like crazy
I was at uni yesterday it feels like!"
A lot can happen in that time you never know what's round the corner |
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"The most important thing is that you have kids with the right person, for the right reasons, far more important than age or anything else.
I know, but my age is really creeping up on me like crazy
I was at uni yesterday it feels like!"
Mr KC and I have been together 17 years, but it feels like yesterday to us. Time marches on, but rushing into something as life changing as becoming responsible for another human life isn't advised! Having been a child between warring parents and the parent rolling over to prevent the same experience for my son, I'd definitely say that being in the right relationship with shared goals is the most important thing. Honest. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'd love to still be as innocent and naive as to believe it was as simple as just deciding "now I'll have kids"."
What do you mean! It's like in rom cons, you both sit down at the bed look into each others eyes and say let's make a baby!
I'm joking btw |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I'd love to still be as innocent and naive as to believe it was as simple as just deciding "now I'll have kids".
What do you mean! It's like in rom cons, you both sit down at the bed look into each others eyes and say let's make a baby!
I'm joking btw "
Yes. That's just how it works
*pats Morningstar on the head in an affectionately patronising fashion* |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't worry so much about it. Especially as you're a guy.
But I don't want to be an old dad! By the way I'm not trying to take away the fact it's the ladies that are taking all the risk associated with pregnancy.
Why? Wouldn't you rather be a prepared dad with the right mum?" I thought I was a prepared after having my son he was and still is a angel but fuck that nothing ever prepared me for my daughter!! Love her but ouff hard work lol |
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By *indergirlWoman
over a year ago
somewhere, someplace |
"I wouldn't worry so much about it. Especially as you're a guy.
But I don't want to be an old dad! By the way I'm not trying to take away the fact it's the ladies that are taking all the risk associated with pregnancy.
Why? Wouldn't you rather be a prepared dad with the right mum?I thought I was a prepared after having my son he was and still is a angel but fuck that nothing ever prepared me for my daughter!! Love her but ouff hard work lol"
Feel sorry for me I have two little divas to deal with, they're the reason behind the hair colour, it's hiding the greys they've caused |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't worry so much about it. Especially as you're a guy.
But I don't want to be an old dad! By the way I'm not trying to take away the fact it's the ladies that are taking all the risk associated with pregnancy.
Why? Wouldn't you rather be a prepared dad with the right mum?I thought I was a prepared after having my son he was and still is a angel but fuck that nothing ever prepared me for my daughter!! Love her but ouff hard work lol
Feel sorry for me I have two little divas to deal with, they're the reason behind the hair colour, it's hiding the greys they've caused " |
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Enjoy your freedom. Don't seek to end it. If you meet the right person then great but don't try to end the good life you have.
I sought to end my singleness and ended up in a terrible marriage. I only found happiness in the relationship I'm in now by stumbling into it purely by chance after a sequence of random actions and events. If I had gone looking for it I doubt I would have found it. Luke |
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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago
All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest |
I was a father at age 30 precisely how I intended. 20's was to have fun and enjoy 2-3 years of childless marriage before embracing the responsibility of parenting. Planned approach worked well in my case |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I was a father at age 30 precisely how I intended. 20's was to have fun and enjoy 2-3 years of childless marriage before embracing the responsibility of parenting. Planned approach worked well in my case "
This is my plan too. To be 30 with one kids but ideally marry at 27/28. Only hard part is to find the perfect wife to be |
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I had my daughter at 24 and son at 28.
You’ll know when you’ve found the right person. It just clicks.
When I turned 30 it was just little old me bringing them up as I lost my husband.
They’re hard work sometimes but bloomin amazing and keep me going.
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"I think this thread has been taken a little to seriously considering who the OP is
So ready to be a dad by the way! My dad jokes are unmatched!"
We're trying to infuse you with the wisdom of the collective parent!! Would you prefer a different infusion? Peppermint tea, perhaps?! |
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I had my son when I was 23. I'm now 30.
I wouldn't ever have said I wanted kids but I would never change it. Personally I wouldn't have any more. I don't see myself finding a woman that'll change that haha
That little dude sees me as a king among men. That feeling is really something else |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was 20 then 24 when I had my children.
I am glad I didnt wait as I think with the twists and turns my life took I may not have had any at this point.
I now cannot have more so am thankful I got the gift of motherhood when I did.
Don't overthink it, when the time is right, it will happen |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Or you can wait when you feel ready, rather than put a number on it. I came from not wanting them at all since I was a teenager to suddenly developing an instinct within months. No more though Wonder how men feel it? |
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By *eilde HoarWoman
over a year ago
In a wax coated bubble |
"I'd love to still be as innocent and naive as to believe it was as simple as just deciding "now I'll have kids"."
Depends on the dynamics Posh, this co parenting malarkey looks interesting, if I knew about that in my 30's I would have gone for that Instead |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wake up and panic about this, im 36 and want kids so much. Its only this past year ive really started panicking about age,kids ect "
Dont.
At 30 I was broody.
35 I was resigning myself to being childless.
Had my daughter at 38 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Having a child is not something you do because you think it’s time to meet a deadline.
However, I didn’t want anything to do with children, not in the least, until mine came into my life. Then I wondered why it had taken me so long but it was when I was ready to face it.
I can’t wait for my grandchildren!!! |
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"I was 26 and 37. Much harder the second time around!
To be fair I did give birth to the devil second time though!
There is an old saying that ‘the apple never falls far from the tree’. "
. Must be her dad. I’m an angel |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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was 44!
I work away a lot until recently, 8 weeks away 4 at home and I felt selfish expecting someone else to do all the work while I’m away, to miss endless special moments and so much. But that was my life, my career and my choice. Then my daughter came along and my direction in life changed.
Age isn’t a barrier for guys, but I think being able to give it your all, and feel young enough to do what dads 20 years younger than you can, I’d say out of all the things I’ve done in my life I’m proud of its Fatherhood, and its made me a better man I hope |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was 37 when I had our first and 40 with my 2nd. I had my career, travelled the world and enjoyed life before I found Mr. Now our house is filled with two noisy children, holidays are centred round them and nights out are a rarity but I wouldn’t change it for the world. When it’s meant to be it’s meant to be.
Mrs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I was 26 and 37. Much harder the second time around!
To be fair I did give birth to the devil second time though!"
Oh I relate. Pulling my hair out some days. Like yesterday. |
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"I was 26 and 37. Much harder the second time around!
To be fair I did give birth to the devil second time though!
Oh I relate. Pulling my hair out some days. Like yesterday. "
Oh yes! Doesn’t help that the first one was an absolute angel from day one and still is! This one hit me like a ton of bricks . If it had been the other way around there would definitely be only one . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I was 26 and 37. Much harder the second time around!
To be fair I did give birth to the devil second time though!
Oh I relate. Pulling my hair out some days. Like yesterday.
Oh yes! Doesn’t help that the first one was an absolute angel from day one and still is! This one hit me like a ton of bricks . If it had been the other way around there would definitely be only one . "
Yes! False advertisement. |
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"I was 26 and 37. Much harder the second time around!
To be fair I did give birth to the devil second time though!
Oh I relate. Pulling my hair out some days. Like yesterday.
Oh yes! Doesn’t help that the first one was an absolute angel from day one and still is! This one hit me like a ton of bricks . If it had been the other way around there would definitely be only one .
Yes! False advertisement. "
Haha. Is there somewhere I can sue? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"At 23, I was like I have plenty of time till 30 so I can wait, as I also didn't want to be an old dad.
But now that I'm almost 27, I'm thinking I'll wait to 35 and just get a wifey that's like 5 years younger "
Kids are great. Ages 1-5 are adorable. 5-12 an adventure. 12 - 18 a fucking apocalypse.
But kids are not just for Christmas. They become part of your life. They are like a limb. For 15 years you know everything about them and exactly where they are.
They are not something you accumulate. They don't spring up on command in a woman's womb.
Find the right person for you. Then worry about kids. |
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"I was 26 and 37. Much harder the second time around!
To be fair I did give birth to the devil second time though!
Oh I relate. Pulling my hair out some days. Like yesterday.
Oh yes! Doesn’t help that the first one was an absolute angel from day one and still is! This one hit me like a ton of bricks . If it had been the other way around there would definitely be only one . "
I swear this is a trick by nature! Second borns always seem to be wild . Though my friend had a third despite the second wild child and the third was the chillest kid I've ever encountered! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I had my eldest son at 17 and my youngest at 24. I love bring a young mum but I regret who their father is. I've battled so many stereotypes along the way and my 3 boys are becoming fine young men.
Age is really irrelevant. Finding the right person is vital.
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"I was 26 and 37. Much harder the second time around!
To be fair I did give birth to the devil second time though!
Oh I relate. Pulling my hair out some days. Like yesterday.
Oh yes! Doesn’t help that the first one was an absolute angel from day one and still is! This one hit me like a ton of bricks . If it had been the other way around there would definitely be only one .
I swear this is a trick by nature! Second borns always seem to be wild . Though my friend had a third despite the second wild child and the third was the chillest kid I've ever encountered! "
Yeah my brother did and the third is a delight!
Not a risk I’m willing to take though . I’ve done my bit for the population. |
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I never wanted kids until I met Mr Racer. All about the right person and the right time.
Having said that, I'm glad we had them younger, my body wouldn't cope with pregnancy now and I was still used to sleepless nights! |
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"I was 26 and 37. Much harder the second time around!
To be fair I did give birth to the devil second time though!
Oh I relate. Pulling my hair out some days. Like yesterday.
Oh yes! Doesn’t help that the first one was an absolute angel from day one and still is! This one hit me like a ton of bricks . If it had been the other way around there would definitely be only one .
I swear this is a trick by nature! Second borns always seem to be wild . Though my friend had a third despite the second wild child and the third was the chillest kid I've ever encountered!
Yeah my brother did and the third is a delight!
Not a risk I’m willing to take though . I’ve done my bit for the population. "
I'm agreeing with this theory! Second child = wild child
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"The most important thing is that you have kids with the right person, for the right reasons, far more important than age or anything else.
I know, but my age is really creeping up on me like crazy
I was at uni yesterday it feels like!"
My ex-husband was 28 when we married: only seems like yesterday. Wished him happy 70th birthday last week!
I understand what you mean about time, but don't panic, you do still have time on your hands. |
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"I was 17 when I had my first and 42 when my last was born! I would recommend the latter! Had more patience more stamina needed less sleep! So dont worry x
Wow and I thought my age gap was big! "
My eldest daughter and I were pregnant together twice her second child and my 5th are 4 months apart her youngest and my youngest are 10 days apart! |
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"Morningstar, my Dad was 47 when I was born (his first child) and 49, nearly 50 when my brother was born. It's do-able. It should be said that my mother is 20yrs younger than him (they divorced, but that's not important here!) "
That gives me hope, then
I'm 48 now, and have never really been that bothered about kids until the past few years. However, suddenly realising that the opportunity has largely passed you by takes some getting your head round. Especially having had three miscarriages with two ex partners....
But also I've always thought it gets to a point where it becomes unfair on the child if the parents are too old and can't necessarily keep up. I'm thinking of Charlie Chaplin and Des O'Connor, who both had kids in their 70s, which seems utterly selfish to me - they're hardly likely to be around to watch them fully grow up |
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