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By *gent Coulson OP Man
over a year ago
Secret hideaway in the pennines |
So, after chatting to someone for months, lockdown finishes and you are able to meet, and play, you click on almost all levels, and the play becomes more regular.
Over that time, you realise that, your feelings for that person are changing to something more than just a playmate.
Do you stay as you are and not say anything, do you open up run the risk of blowing what you have, or do you end it for your own protection |
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"So, after chatting to someone for months, lockdown finishes and you are able to meet, and play, you click on almost all levels, and the play becomes more regular.
Over that time, you realise that, your feelings for that person are changing to something more than just a playmate.
Do you stay as you are and not say anything, do you open up run the risk of blowing what you have, or do you end it for your own protection "
I would always always be truthful no matter what happens.
I've been seeing someone like this once or twice a week for a few months. We get on so well and sex is explosive but I dont think I have any feelings like that, I also think if it was gunna happen (feelings wise) it would of already. |
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If you don't take a few risks and be honest with your feelings its going to be a longer life than it feels.
Give things a chance, sure you may get knocks now and again but you may find something amazing  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Honesty above all else.
If you're both single then guess it's not hurting anyone.
If they didn't reciprocate then I'd end it. No point in getting hurt x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If I read that correctly and you haven't met yet definitely don't say ... you need to meet to find your true feelings for each other!
If you the other hand I read it wrong and you've met and fallen in love and the other person is in a position (ie single) where they can, the definitely say! |
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By *gent Coulson OP Man
over a year ago
Secret hideaway in the pennines |
"If I read that correctly and you haven't met yet definitely don't say ... you need to meet to find your true feelings for each other!
If you the other hand I read it wrong and you've met and fallen in love and the other person is in a position (ie single) where they can, the definitely say! "
Its hypothetical. I was in this position 5 years ago |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"If I read that correctly and you haven't met yet definitely don't say ... you need to meet to find your true feelings for each other!
If you the other hand I read it wrong and you've met and fallen in love and the other person is in a position (ie single) where they can, the definitely say!
Its hypothetical. I was in this position 5 years ago"
I read it right! Cool ... so what did you do five years ago then? |
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By *gent Coulson OP Man
over a year ago
Secret hideaway in the pennines |
"If I read that correctly and you haven't met yet definitely don't say ... you need to meet to find your true feelings for each other!
If you the other hand I read it wrong and you've met and fallen in love and the other person is in a position (ie single) where they can, the definitely say!
Its hypothetical. I was in this position 5 years ago
I read it right! Cool ... so what did you do five years ago then? "
I ended up spending the next 4 years with her |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"If I read that correctly and you haven't met yet definitely don't say ... you need to meet to find your true feelings for each other!
If you the other hand I read it wrong and you've met and fallen in love and the other person is in a position (ie single) where they can, the definitely say!
Its hypothetical. I was in this position 5 years ago
I read it right! Cool ... so what did you do five years ago then? I ended up spending the next 4 years with her"
Awwwwww that's great! Hope it was a natural ending ... |
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I think this is one of those very difficult situations where you can feel damned if you do and damned if you don’t.
I was good friends with someone and I fell for them, I was left with a dilemma, much like yours: tell them, be honest and accept their repose for what it was. Or say nothing, continue being just a friend, whilst harbouring greater feelings and desires.
I chose to say something, because I felt that if they later found out, it may call in to question whether past actions and empathy was not from the position of friendship, but from an ulterior motive standpoint. When I told them I was very clear that my feelings had grown over time and the things that I did out of friendship were just that, out of friendship, however I could not in good faith continue to claim in my heart that it was just that for me now and that they should know.
That was a while ago now, and we’ll, I did not get my happy ever after, but what I did get was a feeling that regardless for the outcome for me, I gave that person a choice based on truth.
Good luck OP, whatever you decide, I wish you well and say the one thing I have learnt from my experience, is that love for me is about wanting happiness for the one that you fall for, regardless of whether they find that with you or another.
Be well |
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By *gent Coulson OP Man
over a year ago
Secret hideaway in the pennines |
"If I read that correctly and you haven't met yet definitely don't say ... you need to meet to find your true feelings for each other!
If you the other hand I read it wrong and you've met and fallen in love and the other person is in a position (ie single) where they can, the definitely say!
Its hypothetical. I was in this position 5 years ago
I read it right! Cool ... so what did you do five years ago then? I ended up spending the next 4 years with her
Awwwwww that's great! Hope it was a natural ending ... "
sadly no |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"If I read that correctly and you haven't met yet definitely don't say ... you need to meet to find your true feelings for each other!
If you the other hand I read it wrong and you've met and fallen in love and the other person is in a position (ie single) where they can, the definitely say!
Its hypothetical. I was in this position 5 years ago
I read it right! Cool ... so what did you do five years ago then? I ended up spending the next 4 years with her
Awwwwww that's great! Hope it was a natural ending ... sadly no"
Sorry to hear that  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I think this is one of those very difficult situations where you can feel damned if you do and damned if you don’t.
I was good friends with someone and I fell for them, I was left with a dilemma, much like yours: tell them, be honest and accept their repose for what it was. Or say nothing, continue being just a friend, whilst harbouring greater feelings and desires.
I chose to say something, because I felt that if they later found out, it may call in to question whether past actions and empathy was not from the position of friendship, but from an ulterior motive standpoint. When I told them I was very clear that my feelings had grown over time and the things that I did out of friendship were just that, out of friendship, however I could not in good faith continue to claim in my heart that it was just that for me now and that they should know.
That was a while ago now, and we’ll, I did not get my happy ever after, but what I did get was a feeling that regardless for the outcome for me, I gave that person a choice based on truth.
Good luck OP, whatever you decide, I wish you well and say the one thing I have learnt from my experience, is that love for me is about wanting happiness for the one that you fall for, regardless of whether they find that with you or another.
Be well "
This is so honest and how lovely of you to tell such a heartfelt story.
I'm sorry things didn't work out for you x
|
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By *gent Coulson OP Man
over a year ago
Secret hideaway in the pennines |
"I think this is one of those very difficult situations where you can feel damned if you do and damned if you don’t.
I was good friends with someone and I fell for them, I was left with a dilemma, much like yours: tell them, be honest and accept their repose for what it was. Or say nothing, continue being just a friend, whilst harbouring greater feelings and desires.
I chose to say something, because I felt that if they later found out, it may call in to question whether past actions and empathy was not from the position of friendship, but from an ulterior motive standpoint. When I told them I was very clear that my feelings had grown over time and the things that I did out of friendship were just that, out of friendship, however I could not in good faith continue to claim in my heart that it was just that for me now and that they should know.
That was a while ago now, and we’ll, I did not get my happy ever after, but what I did get was a feeling that regardless for the outcome for me, I gave that person a choice based on truth.
Good luck OP, whatever you decide, I wish you well and say the one thing I have learnt from my experience, is that love for me is about wanting happiness for the one that you fall for, regardless of whether they find that with you or another.
Be well "
Honesty is always the best answer, no matter what the outcome |
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"I think this is one of those very difficult situations where you can feel damned if you do and damned if you don’t.
I was good friends with someone and I fell for them, I was left with a dilemma, much like yours: tell them, be honest and accept their repose for what it was. Or say nothing, continue being just a friend, whilst harbouring greater feelings and desires.
I chose to say something, because I felt that if they later found out, it may call in to question whether past actions and empathy was not from the position of friendship, but from an ulterior motive standpoint. When I told them I was very clear that my feelings had grown over time and the things that I did out of friendship were just that, out of friendship, however I could not in good faith continue to claim in my heart that it was just that for me now and that they should know.
That was a while ago now, and we’ll, I did not get my happy ever after, but what I did get was a feeling that regardless for the outcome for me, I gave that person a choice based on truth.
Good luck OP, whatever you decide, I wish you well and say the one thing I have learnt from my experience, is that love for me is about wanting happiness for the one that you fall for, regardless of whether they find that with you or another.
Be well
This is so honest and how lovely of you to tell such a heartfelt story.
I'm sorry things didn't work out for you x
"
No need to be sorry, to feel strongly about someone is an absolutely beautiful thing, the creativity and general peace I have found in myself, knowing that I could love is priceless x |
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By *gent Coulson OP Man
over a year ago
Secret hideaway in the pennines |
"If I read that correctly and you haven't met yet definitely don't say ... you need to meet to find your true feelings for each other!
If you the other hand I read it wrong and you've met and fallen in love and the other person is in a position (ie single) where they can, the definitely say!
Its hypothetical. I was in this position 5 years ago
I read it right! Cool ... so what did you do five years ago then? I ended up spending the next 4 years with her
Awwwwww that's great! Hope it was a natural ending ... sadly no
Sorry to hear that "
As the saying goes, it is better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I think this is one of those very difficult situations where you can feel damned if you do and damned if you don’t.
I was good friends with someone and I fell for them, I was left with a dilemma, much like yours: tell them, be honest and accept their repose for what it was. Or say nothing, continue being just a friend, whilst harbouring greater feelings and desires.
I chose to say something, because I felt that if they later found out, it may call in to question whether past actions and empathy was not from the position of friendship, but from an ulterior motive standpoint. When I told them I was very clear that my feelings had grown over time and the things that I did out of friendship were just that, out of friendship, however I could not in good faith continue to claim in my heart that it was just that for me now and that they should know.
That was a while ago now, and we’ll, I did not get my happy ever after, but what I did get was a feeling that regardless for the outcome for me, I gave that person a choice based on truth.
Good luck OP, whatever you decide, I wish you well and say the one thing I have learnt from my experience, is that love for me is about wanting happiness for the one that you fall for, regardless of whether they find that with you or another.
Be well
This is so honest and how lovely of you to tell such a heartfelt story.
I'm sorry things didn't work out for you x
No need to be sorry, to feel strongly about someone is an absolutely beautiful thing, the creativity and general peace I have found in myself, knowing that I could love is priceless x"
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