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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So my journey into the swinging world has been an eye opener to say the least.
When I first ventured onto this site and into this more open world I thought it was just keys in a bowl type scenario... boy was I wrong.
I’ve now been here over 5 years and loving this whole new world. I’ve feel I’ve grown not only more adventurous but much more confident and respectful and less judgmental of others kinks and bedroom preferences.
Do you think it’s the archaic view of swinging that still keeps it taboo in the eyes of the vanilla?
Do you think that films like 50 shades have helped or hindered the world of swing/kink ?
What’s your thoughts on it all ?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Actually, if any of my ‘real life’ friends Joke about swinging, the key bowl will pop up in the subject, so it’s a first impresión for a few still. I don’t think that will go away.
My views are similar to you op, I’ve had a chance to speak to a lot of people that are likeable people regardless of what sex lives they pursue.
Some good peeps on Fab, I asume he same that swing that are not on Fab too.  |
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I think having sex outside your primary relationship is going to be taboo for many years to come, there are still many more people who aren't swingers than who are.
I've never seen 50 Shades of read the books but I think they've initiated conversations that people might not have had before and that can only be a good thing.
I think choice is great |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Swinging is for the Elite only. It's a much higher level of Sex than the vanillas do. 
50 shades gave many people a voice so they felt able to say what they like sexually. I think they were a great tool. |
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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
In my opinion what m keeps if taboo is the sexual repression we have in this country. The misogynistic attitudes that sex is only for and enjoyable by straight men.
That we punish, penalise and put in danger people working in the sex/kink industry.
I cant speak from a swinging perspective, but I am one of those kinksters who values what 50 shades has done, bringing the conversation about BDSM into the main stream. However, much like porn before it, people need to take the time to educate themselves about it to allow them to enjoy it safely, and sadly books and porn fail to do that as its all about the titilation.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think the main the term swinging is mentioned, a lot still think of the keys in the bowl analogy and I doubt that's I'll change any time soon.
I don't class myself as a swinger, more non monogamous / poly / sexually liberated (there's probably a ton more lables I could use) I'm quite open about it but I still have a few vanilla friends who think it's a phase, that I'll come through the other side and settle down with one person. I think we're a long way off from a ethical non monogamous lifestyle being full accepted unfortunately. |
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In my opinion what keeps it taboo is that the majority of Vanilla supporters use monogamy/faithfulness as a tool to measure the "righteousness" , the strength of their and everybody else's relationships.
" If you really love me , you wouldn't want to shag someone else "
" You can't really love him if you fancy the bones of someone else "
Oh there's also the gender issue , a woman enjoying multiple men , at once (or not but outside of committed relationships) , is often thought of as a slag .
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So my journey into the swinging world has been an eye opener to say the least.
When I first ventured onto this site and into this more open world I thought it was just keys in a bowl type scenario... boy was I wrong.
I’ve now been here over 5 years and loving this whole new world. I’ve feel I’ve grown not only more adventurous but much more confident and respectful and less judgmental of others kinks and bedroom preferences.
Do you think it’s the archaic view of swinging that still keeps it taboo in the eyes of the vanilla?
Do you think that films like 50 shades have helped or hindered the world of swing/kink ?
What’s your thoughts on it all ?
"
I think a lot of people don't understand what it is. And a lot can't bear the idea of sharing their partner, so would find this lifestyle hard to understand. Personally I'm here as a single woman but I've yet to decide if I would remain here in a swinging relationship. |
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By *ancer36Woman
over a year ago
Stirling |
"So my journey into the swinging world has been an eye opener to say the least.
When I first ventured onto this site and into this more open world I thought it was just keys in a bowl type scenario... boy was I wrong.
I’ve now been here over 5 years and loving this whole new world. I’ve feel I’ve grown not only more adventurous but much more confident and respectful and less judgmental of others kinks and bedroom preferences.
Do you think it’s the archaic view of swinging that still keeps it taboo in the eyes of the vanilla?
Do you think that films like 50 shades have helped or hindered the world of swing/kink ?
What’s your thoughts on it all ?
I think a lot of people don't understand what it is. And a lot can't bear the idea of sharing their partner, so would find this lifestyle hard to understand. Personally I'm here as a single woman but I've yet to decide if I would remain here in a swinging relationship."
Exactly the same for me x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've seen it in films such as The Ice Storm, but I've never heard of anyone really doing the key bowl swinging thing. I think it may be an urban myth, or a fantasy that people had. |
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"I've seen it in films such as The Ice Storm, but I've never heard of anyone really doing the key bowl swinging thing. I think it may be an urban myth, or a fantasy that people had."
If in the future you are ever invited to a private party you may find it actually does happen  |
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"Swinging is for the Elite only. It's a much higher level of Sex than the vanillas do.
50 shades gave many people a voice so they felt able to say what they like sexually. I think they were a great tool. "
This! Being able to talk openly about is awesome. I talk to some of my lad mates and they're like WTF cause I enjoy kink, each to they're own but I'd rather not have sex than have vanilla. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Culture has a lot to answer for. Possessiveness and assumptions cause issues. We teach about relationships in school but we only teach children about conventional relationships. To be with one person...if you can have multiple best friends it stands to reason that you can have multiple partners...as long as everyone is consensual there’s no issue. Things won’t change until people are more open and discussions are had. I recently was placed under investigation when it came to light that I was on here I’ve never and will never hide this. It’s my choice in the same way that people choose to cheat, have one night stands or be monogamous. |
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Bob went to this swingers party and tossed his car keys into a bowl, he thought he had hit the jackpot when this hot big titted sultry blonde picked them out......
.....he never saw that BMW ever again!  |
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By * F 2018Couple
over a year ago
shropshire |
"So my journey into the swinging world has been an eye opener to say the least.
When I first ventured onto this site and into this more open world I thought it was just keys in a bowl type scenario... boy was I wrong.
I’ve now been here over 5 years and loving this whole new world. I’ve feel I’ve grown not only more adventurous but much more confident and respectful and less judgmental of others kinks and bedroom preferences.
Do you think it’s the archaic view of swinging that still keeps it taboo in the eyes of the vanilla?
Do you think that films like 50 shades have helped or hindered the world of swing/kink ?
What’s your thoughts on it all ?
"
Yes agree with things you have said years ago people did think keys in a bowl and now people still think its taboo ,awful,disgusting etc I tried to explain what a club atmosphere was like to a friend that knew.she really believed it was wall to wall people just having sex! We keep it a secret cause its no one else's business. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A whole site of swingers covering the world, and nobody can confirm actually seeing or participating in a key party. I therefore still suspect it's a viral myth that went sort of viral, dreamed up by some 1960s tabloid journalist.
Key parties would make no sense anyway. The participants would have to stay the night, so they didn't walk into an embarrassing scene when they return home - that's a scary commitment right there. And anyway how would they return home without their cars? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've met people in the real world and sometimes tentatively told them I am on here, maybe not directly but hinting at it.
You'd be surprised how many have either mentioned it by name (they either have been here or know someone who is) or they just wanted to know more.
I think it's becoming more accepted in society especially with the younger generation.
After all, most of the swipe left/right dating isn't much different! |
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I think 50 shades of grey did a lot of good. It got a lot of middle aged women talking about sex. Ive never read it myself but my mum did and her work friends and it got them talking about it. Ive been swinging for many many years and never come across the keys in a bowl scenario think that was a 60s and 70s thing
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
I don’t think that it’s necessarily that, but lots of misconceptions do build up to paint a false picture.
The primary issue though is that sex is still a taboo, we still struggle to communicate clearly about it (even on here we use euphemisms), sex outside of marriage is judged and those that enjoy it are shamed. Swinging is all part of that.
Look at how the tabloid press approaches the subject of swingers; as sex crazed lunatics, to understand how we’re viewed.
To be honest, monogamy is a huge part of society and sex is integral to that. Whilst some on here may see it differently (I don’t say all, because many don’t), sex is still built into being the sacred part of relationships for society and that’s not going to change any time soon.
We can dispel myths but we’ll never be accepted |
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