FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Morning musing....
Morning musing....
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
Having a morning muse in the bath....
Do forum games send out wrong signals sometimes.
When a forum game is in full swing, with the flirting and the back and forth, do you find that people (men or women) presume they should take it as a green light to message privately or send spontaneous friend invites?
Does friendly accommodation into a forum game, and often outrageous forum flirting (obviously not from me what with my never being a flirt) give them the assumption that they will be meeting you at a later date?
Does a message from someone you've flirted wildly with on a thread make you think "ooh" or is it just more unsolicited mail? Or does it depend on who it is and whether you like the look and sound of them? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes....
Half the men that use the forums think you would give them one....ya big flirt. 
To be serious tho, yeah....i think a lot of people take the slightest interaction as a green light. It's why I rarely flirt with people I don't know in the forums.
Lu  |
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It's an open forum game. My serious flirting goes on in PMs. Yes, sometimes forum flirting leads to that, it certainly can give you an idea of their sense if humour and wether you would click or not.
There's some on the forums I flirt outrageously with, but they know from private messages that our meets would be social only, it's just sometimes nice to be a little cheeky! |
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"Yes....
Half the men that use the forums think you would give them one....ya big flirt.
"Think....?? She probably WOULD"
To be serious tho, yeah....i think a lot of people take the slightest interaction as a green light. It's why I rarely flirt with people I don't know in the forums.
Lu "
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"Yes....
Half the men that use the forums think you would give them one....ya big flirt.
To be serious tho, yeah....i think a lot of people take the slightest interaction as a green light. It's why I rarely flirt with people I don't know in the forums.
Lu "
Me? But I never flirt! |
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"It's an open forum game. My serious flirting goes on in PMs. Yes, sometimes forum flirting leads to that, it certainly can give you an idea of their sense if humour and wether you would click or not.
There's some on the forums I flirt outrageously with, but they know from private messages that our meets would be social only, it's just sometimes nice to be a little cheeky! "
I keep it all in the forums. I'm not brave enough to take it outside of there.
I don't know how an unsolicited message would go and I certainly wouldn't want to offend, upset or make anyone uncomfortable. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes....
Half the men that use the forums think you would give them one....ya big flirt.
"Think....?? She probably WOULD"
To be serious tho, yeah....i think a lot of people take the slightest interaction as a green light. It's why I rarely flirt with people I don't know in the forums.
Lu "
True story....brazen hussy she is! |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"It's an open forum game. My serious flirting goes on in PMs. Yes, sometimes forum flirting leads to that, it certainly can give you an idea of their sense if humour and wether you would click or not.
There's some on the forums I flirt outrageously with, but they know from private messages that our meets would be social only, it's just sometimes nice to be a little cheeky! "
That's how I do it.....
If I ever flirted of course. Which I don't 
About this social only business....  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes....
Half the men that use the forums think you would give them one....ya big flirt.
To be serious tho, yeah....i think a lot of people take the slightest interaction as a green light. It's why I rarely flirt with people I don't know in the forums.
Lu
Me? But I never flirt! "
Nooooooooo you've never required oxygen either right? And you're a trillionaire  |
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"It's an open forum game. My serious flirting goes on in PMs. Yes, sometimes forum flirting leads to that, it certainly can give you an idea of their sense if humour and wether you would click or not.
There's some on the forums I flirt outrageously with, but they know from private messages that our meets would be social only, it's just sometimes nice to be a little cheeky!
That's how I do it.....
If I ever flirted of course. Which I don't
About this social only business.... "
Pfft, you're getting dragged to the clubs and you know it.
Stop acting coy, no-one is convinced  |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"If you don’t try you don’t get anywhere just be respectful "
I think this is the thing..... sometimes the forum flirting can be wild but suddenly having a "you want this?" message with a dick or foof attached can be a bit alarming.
A nice message though, that's all good |
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By *gent CoulsonMan
over a year ago
Secret hideaway in the pennines |
I take it as a bit of fun, and occasionally I will PM someone with a comment on something they have said, my comments are hardly ever rude or offensive, and rarely indicate an interest or intention.
Unless I really fancy the fuck out of them |
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Guess that's the same in all of walks of life. Like if you start chatting with a random in pub, some perceive it as a green light. When you're having a bit of a laugh and being polite.
It's human nature though, one of my mates married the man she had a random conversation in a taxi rank. So you never quite know where meets or relationships begin. |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"It doesn't even take a forum game. I've just replied to a comment in general forum posts before only to then find myself followed around the forums by that person. "
Tbf you're not wrong. That does happen....
Sorry about that by the way |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"Yes....
Half the men that use the forums think you would give them one....ya big flirt.
"Think....?? She probably WOULD"
To be serious tho, yeah....i think a lot of people take the slightest interaction as a green light. It's why I rarely flirt with people I don't know in the forums.
Lu "
Oi Jetson. You know that's only partly true. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think my flirting ‘could’ send out the wrong message. But do I do it intentionaly? No, not really, it’s just me having a laugh with someone else I feel is having a laugh.
Things seem very serious in here, and sometimes those games give me a glimmer of hope that it’s not all doom and gloom when/if we meet up. |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"It's an open forum game. My serious flirting goes on in PMs. Yes, sometimes forum flirting leads to that, it certainly can give you an idea of their sense if humour and wether you would click or not.
There's some on the forums I flirt outrageously with, but they know from private messages that our meets would be social only, it's just sometimes nice to be a little cheeky!
I keep it all in the forums. I'm not brave enough to take it outside of there.
I don't know how an unsolicited message would go and I certainly wouldn't want to offend, upset or make anyone uncomfortable. "
*splutters on coffee*
Netflix button? Although that wasn't unsolicited |
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By *ancer36Woman
over a year ago
Stirling |
I treat it as a bit of fun, I enjoy flirting and don’t see the harm in it.
If someone catches my eye or there’s someone on the forum I’ve chatted with before then I’ll perhaps send a cheeky message but never a missleading one.
I’ve found the forums have allowed me to connect with woman more which has been most enjoyable |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"Most people are all flirt, no action. The downside to the forums for most is distance. And that many are in relationships with limited time to get away. Its still good to flirt though  "
I agree.... the forum is a great place to have a giggle and a flirt and to pass the time, especially now. And make connections for road trips.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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yep
like you NSP, i never flirt on forums
but hypothetically if i did, i do it outrageously-so, smart mouth, inclusive of all.. because its fun and kind and what forums are all about.
however it is upsetting when someone takes it further to PM thinking they're on a promise, because of a forum game. i don't like being the 'no person' (people pleaser, go figure  ).. but it's necessary.
take forum games, or anything for that matter, with a pinch of salt.
Px 
PS... your bath got room for a smol ginger one? |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"Yes....
Half the men that use the forums think you would give them one....ya big flirt.
To be serious tho, yeah....i think a lot of people take the slightest interaction as a green light. It's why I rarely flirt with people I don't know in the forums.
Lu
Me? But I never flirt!
Nooooooooo you've never required oxygen either right? And you're a trillionaire "
You know me so well |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"It's an open forum game. My serious flirting goes on in PMs. Yes, sometimes forum flirting leads to that, it certainly can give you an idea of their sense if humour and wether you would click or not.
There's some on the forums I flirt outrageously with, but they know from private messages that our meets would be social only, it's just sometimes nice to be a little cheeky!
That's how I do it.....
If I ever flirted of course. Which I don't
About this social only business....
Pfft, you're getting dragged to the clubs and you know it.
Stop acting coy, no-one is convinced "
Shhh..... I think I've convinced at least some of them |
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"It doesn't even take a forum game. I've just replied to a comment in general forum posts before only to then find myself followed around the forums by that person.
Tbf you're not wrong. That does happen....
Sorry about that by the way "
! |
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"Yes....
Half the men that use the forums think you would give them one....ya big flirt.
To be serious tho, yeah....i think a lot of people take the slightest interaction as a green light. It's why I rarely flirt with people I don't know in the forums.
Lu "
Same . I rarely flirt either |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I take it as a bit of fun, and occasionally I will PM someone with a comment on something they have said, my comments are hardly ever rude or offensive, and rarely indicate an interest or intention.
Unless I really fancy the fuck out of them"
I think a comment about something that's being talked about is the exception to most people, I often chat about forum threads (when I actually check my inbox )
If you fancied the fuck out of them you'd never send a dick pic though, right? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I guess it's all fun and harmless. I enjoy interacting with people and a little flirt.. sometimes You get to know people's personality through the forums and sometimes they can lead to finding some special people to take it further with privately. It's a strange fab world and we all just live in it  |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"Guess that's the same in all of walks of life. Like if you start chatting with a random in pub, some perceive it as a green light. When you're having a bit of a laugh and being polite.
It's human nature though, one of my mates married the man she had a random conversation in a taxi rank. So you never quite know where meets or relationships begin. "
That's so true my gorgeous pal.
Don't try you'll never know I suppose |
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"If you don’t try you don’t get anywhere just be respectful "
This. If you're not interested just ignore friend requests so they can't send them again, respectfully decline messages and block where appropriate.
Are they wrong to assume you like them if you flirt with them? |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I think my flirting ‘could’ send out the wrong message. But do I do it intentionaly? No, not really, it’s just me having a laugh with someone else I feel is having a laugh.
Things seem very serious in here, and sometimes those games give me a glimmer of hope that it’s not all doom and gloom when/if we meet up. "
The glimmer of hope is the important thing....
Hang on, you mean I don't get to be hammered and have your cream?  |
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"Guess that's the same in all of walks of life. Like if you start chatting with a random in pub, some perceive it as a green light. When you're having a bit of a laugh and being polite.
It's human nature though, one of my mates married the man she had a random conversation in a taxi rank. So you never quite know where meets or relationships begin.
That's so true my gorgeous pal.
Don't try you'll never know I suppose "
I guess it all boils down to how it's done. Flirting and then sending a PM to test the waters is fine. Assumption that what you said in a game is some kind of legally binding contract not so good. I mean I like playing fantasy games doesn't mean I think I'm an elf |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I treat it as a bit of fun, I enjoy flirting and don’t see the harm in it.
If someone catches my eye or there’s someone on the forum I’ve chatted with before then I’ll perhaps send a cheeky message but never a missleading one.
I’ve found the forums have allowed me to connect with woman more which has been most enjoyable "
It's one of my favourite things about the forum....
I like your cheeky messages..... |
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Sometimes yes...we often get messages on the back of a forum post, usually wanting us to elaborate on our reply...
Or in games, asking a question then responding with pics of themselves...
I think some see it as a way in...an open invitation.
I suppose if it’s someone you want to message then you aren’t going to complain...but if it’s not then ‘how dare they’
K |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I think my flirting ‘could’ send out the wrong message. But do I do it intentionaly? No, not really, it’s just me having a laugh with someone else I feel is having a laugh.
Things seem very serious in here, and sometimes those games give me a glimmer of hope that it’s not all doom and gloom when/if we meet up.
The glimmer of hope is the important thing....
Hang on, you mean I don't get to be hammered and have your cream? "
There’s enough to go around, My cream can serve six portions. |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"yep
like you NSP, i never flirt on forums
but hypothetically if i did, i do it outrageously-so, smart mouth, inclusive of all.. because its fun and kind and what forums are all about.
however it is upsetting when someone takes it further to PM thinking they're on a promise, because of a forum game. i don't like being the 'no person' (people pleaser, go figure ).. but it's necessary.
take forum games, or anything for that matter, with a pinch of salt.
Px
PS... your bath got room for a smol ginger one? "
Yes!
Oh... you wrote more than just the bath request. Hang on....
That's exactly how I feel about it! The "on a promise". |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"It doesn't even take a forum game. I've just replied to a comment in general forum posts before only to then find myself followed around the forums by that person.
Tbf you're not wrong. That does happen....
Sorry about that by the way
! "
Just out of interest, and because I'm a lazy stalker.... have you commented anywhere else I should go see? |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"Yes....
Half the men that use the forums think you would give them one....ya big flirt.
To be serious tho, yeah....i think a lot of people take the slightest interaction as a green light. It's why I rarely flirt with people I don't know in the forums.
Lu
Same . I rarely flirt either "
At this rate I'm not going to be swallowing any of my coffee.... |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I guess it's all fun and harmless. I enjoy interacting with people and a little flirt.. sometimes You get to know people's personality through the forums and sometimes they can lead to finding some special people to take it further with privately. It's a strange fab world and we all just live in it "
I've found some very special people through forum games. But they've never been the ones who start off with "here's me cock".... |
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"I guess it's all fun and harmless. I enjoy interacting with people and a little flirt.. sometimes You get to know people's personality through the forums and sometimes they can lead to finding some special people to take it further with privately. It's a strange fab world and we all just live in it
I've found some very special people through forum games. But they've never been the ones who start off with "here's me cock"...."
Not it was my vag instead |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"If you don’t try you don’t get anywhere just be respectful
This. If you're not interested just ignore friend requests so they can't send them again, respectfully decline messages and block where appropriate.
Are they wrong to assume you like them if you flirt with them? "
Oh I don't think it's wrong..... my musing may have come out badly. It's more the "you've been sat on my face in a virtual orgy so I'll send you my dick and ask you to sit on that right away" really. |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"Guess that's the same in all of walks of life. Like if you start chatting with a random in pub, some perceive it as a green light. When you're having a bit of a laugh and being polite.
It's human nature though, one of my mates married the man she had a random conversation in a taxi rank. So you never quite know where meets or relationships begin.
That's so true my gorgeous pal.
Don't try you'll never know I suppose
I guess it all boils down to how it's done. Flirting and then sending a PM to test the waters is fine. Assumption that what you said in a game is some kind of legally binding contract not so good. I mean I like playing fantasy games doesn't mean I think I'm an elf "
Woah..... I thought you were an elf..... 
That's the thing. The contract part. I think it's when that is assumed.... |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"Sometimes yes...we often get messages on the back of a forum post, usually wanting us to elaborate on our reply...
Or in games, asking a question then responding with pics of themselves...
I think some see it as a way in...an open invitation.
I suppose if it’s someone you want to message then you aren’t going to complain...but if it’s not then ‘how dare they’
K"
I think that is what it boils down to. That and the actual message received.
I'll chat with anyone (when I actually check messages) but it does depend on what they say. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I guess it's all fun and harmless. I enjoy interacting with people and a little flirt.. sometimes You get to know people's personality through the forums and sometimes they can lead to finding some special people to take it further with privately. It's a strange fab world and we all just live in it "
I agree with this. I've found some lovely people to talk to since I've been back. Yeah I can flirt but you know the ones you're attracted to, both by their online personality and their pictures.
|
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I can see how confusion might be caused as a result of forum flirting "
I can see where the confusion could come from but the kind of messages I'm talking about atenigten at a different level from the flirting. |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I think my flirting ‘could’ send out the wrong message. But do I do it intentionaly? No, not really, it’s just me having a laugh with someone else I feel is having a laugh.
Things seem very serious in here, and sometimes those games give me a glimmer of hope that it’s not all doom and gloom when/if we meet up.
The glimmer of hope is the important thing....
Hang on, you mean I don't get to be hammered and have your cream?
There’s enough to go around, My cream can serve six portions. "
I like a big portion.... may I have 3? |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I guess it's all fun and harmless. I enjoy interacting with people and a little flirt.. sometimes You get to know people's personality through the forums and sometimes they can lead to finding some special people to take it further with privately. It's a strange fab world and we all just live in it
I've found some very special people through forum games. But they've never been the ones who start off with "here's me cock"....
Not it was my vag instead "
True story..... |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
I think that this is one of the things that I’ve found hardest to fathom since my return and I know that Amana feels the same, as we’ve discussed it. Mainly just the sheer volume of flirting, often between the same few folks, which actually seems to signify very little interest. It confuses us both as to who is interested, is anyone at all?
Obviously people are free to do what they want but sometimes trying to pick out genuine interest is like trying to hear a mouse squeak in a Metallica concert!
Also, if someone is flirting all the time with lots of folks on the forums, how can you tell if they’re actually genuine?
I had a conversation with someone the other week about my ooft threads and what their actual purpose is, because all they see is people writing ooft! to each other!
I don’t have an issue with people enjoying themselves and it can be fun but I find it confusing and a little bit exclusionary when it’s dialled up to
11 all the time |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"Love a flirt but it is what it is, and there should be no expectation over what’s flirted or discussed. Manners and respect cost nothing x"
That's the thing, I think sometimes forum flirting with a pair of tits or a sexy torso can send people a bit loopy... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I think my flirting ‘could’ send out the wrong message. But do I do it intentionaly? No, not really, it’s just me having a laugh with someone else I feel is having a laugh.
Things seem very serious in here, and sometimes those games give me a glimmer of hope that it’s not all doom and gloom when/if we meet up.
The glimmer of hope is the important thing....
Hang on, you mean I don't get to be hammered and have your cream?
There’s enough to go around, My cream can serve six portions.
I like a big portion.... may I have 3? "
I bet you like it straight from the can...squirting it into you mouth with your head back. |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I guess it's all fun and harmless. I enjoy interacting with people and a little flirt.. sometimes You get to know people's personality through the forums and sometimes they can lead to finding some special people to take it further with privately. It's a strange fab world and we all just live in it
I agree with this. I've found some lovely people to talk to since I've been back. Yeah I can flirt but you know the ones you're attracted to, both by their online personality and their pictures.
"
Definitely. If I'm flirting "with intent" I'll usually use a wink or one of the "ooft" threads or the like to take it private regardless of whether I flirt on the forum. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I guess it's all fun and harmless. I enjoy interacting with people and a little flirt.. sometimes You get to know people's personality through the forums and sometimes they can lead to finding some special people to take it further with privately. It's a strange fab world and we all just live in it
I've found some very special people through forum games. But they've never been the ones who start off with "here's me cock"...."
That's me told |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
In answer to your OP; I think that people can see forum flirting as a sign to approach, as why else would you be flirting?
I think that people read an awful lot into our posts, far more than we imagine and if we engage with a person in a flirty way, that could be given as an invitation.
I know that flirting is the grease that keeps the forums running, which can be confusing but if someone repeatedly flirted with me, then I would probably get the impression that they’re at least interested. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Love a flirt but it is what it is, and there should be no expectation over what’s flirted or discussed. Manners and respect cost nothing x
That's the thing, I think sometimes forum flirting with a pair of tits or a sexy torso can send people a bit loopy..."
Only if one person is presumptuous and disrespectful. It’s not hard is it? Well not all the time |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I think that this is one of the things that I’ve found hardest to fathom since my return and I know that Amana feels the same, as we’ve discussed it. Mainly just the sheer volume of flirting, often between the same few folks, which actually seems to signify very little interest. It confuses us both as to who is interested, is anyone at all?
Obviously people are free to do what they want but sometimes trying to pick out genuine interest is like trying to hear a mouse squeak in a Metallica concert!
Also, if someone is flirting all the time with lots of folks on the forums, how can you tell if they’re actually genuine?
I had a conversation with someone the other week about my ooft threads and what their actual purpose is, because all they see is people writing ooft! to each other!
I don’t have an issue with people enjoying themselves and it can be fun but I find it confusing and a little bit exclusionary when it’s dialled up to
11 all the time"
I see that point, most definitely.
That's why I like your ooft threads and similar, it gives a chance to actually engage with people you may actually find appealing in private without it being unsolicited.
My thoughts have always been that the "intent based" flirting is in the inbox, and I'm happy with an approach, just not an assumption. If that makes sense? |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I think my flirting ‘could’ send out the wrong message. But do I do it intentionaly? No, not really, it’s just me having a laugh with someone else I feel is having a laugh.
Things seem very serious in here, and sometimes those games give me a glimmer of hope that it’s not all doom and gloom when/if we meet up.
The glimmer of hope is the important thing....
Hang on, you mean I don't get to be hammered and have your cream?
There’s enough to go around, My cream can serve six portions.
I like a big portion.... may I have 3?
I bet you like it straight from the can...squirting it into you mouth with your head back. "
It's like you can see into my soul |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I'm quite flirt and quite playful so yes I flirt on the forums but I don't expect or presume anyone would see it as an actual grren light. If it goes to pm then I'll chat further or not depending on the person. I'll openly flirt on the forums with a playmate and don't care what others think of it. Some don't like it others just scroll on. I won't hide a playmate by avoiding flirting, that can just make them feel crap or they could think I'm being secretative etc.
If someone takes my flirting as a green light I'll let them know if it's not on PM if it comes to it. |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I guess it's all fun and harmless. I enjoy interacting with people and a little flirt.. sometimes You get to know people's personality through the forums and sometimes they can lead to finding some special people to take it further with privately. It's a strange fab world and we all just live in it
I've found some very special people through forum games. But they've never been the ones who start off with "here's me cock"....
That's me told "
We should discuss your cock |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I had to stop myself in a forum game yesterday.
Obviously I'm not worried about people messaging our account but I worry about getting carried away, having an interaction and then messaging someone and me having the wrong idea.
Better for me to stick to boring threads and leave the flirting for socials |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"In answer to your OP; I think that people can see forum flirting as a sign to approach, as why else would you be flirting?
I think that people read an awful lot into our posts, far more than we imagine and if we engage with a person in a flirty way, that could be given as an invitation.
I know that flirting is the grease that keeps the forums running, which can be confusing but if someone repeatedly flirted with me, then I would probably get the impression that they’re at least interested. "
It's just so hard to know in text though, isn't it.
I really should have added in the OP that it's not the "hey, we've been flirting, do you fancy me" type messages I'm curious about. Mostly the random friend requests and the "you will meet me now because you batted your eyelashes a few times" |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"Love a flirt but it is what it is, and there should be no expectation over what’s flirted or discussed. Manners and respect cost nothing x
That's the thing, I think sometimes forum flirting with a pair of tits or a sexy torso can send people a bit loopy...
Only if one person is presumptuous and disrespectful. It’s not hard is it? Well not all the time "
True.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I guess it's all fun and harmless. I enjoy interacting with people and a little flirt.. sometimes You get to know people's personality through the forums and sometimes they can lead to finding some special people to take it further with privately. It's a strange fab world and we all just live in it
I've found some very special people through forum games. But they've never been the ones who start off with "here's me cock"....
That's me told
We should discuss your cock "
Sssssh don't give away my secret identity |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I'm quite flirt and quite playful so yes I flirt on the forums but I don't expect or presume anyone would see it as an actual grren light. If it goes to pm then I'll chat further or not depending on the person. I'll openly flirt on the forums with a playmate and don't care what others think of it. Some don't like it others just scroll on. I won't hide a playmate by avoiding flirting, that can just make them feel crap or they could think I'm being secretative etc.
If someone takes my flirting as a green light I'll let them know if it's not on PM if it comes to it. "
That's a whole other thing!
Avoiding flirting with a playmate or potential playmate can upset them.
And yet it seems if others get wind that there might be something there, flirting is suddenly seen as lamppost pissing! |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I had to stop myself in a forum game yesterday.
Obviously I'm not worried about people messaging our account but I worry about getting carried away, having an interaction and then messaging someone and me having the wrong idea.
Better for me to stick to boring threads and leave the flirting for socials "
There's the rub.... a lot of us are getting our flirt on here because there are no socials! |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I guess it's all fun and harmless. I enjoy interacting with people and a little flirt.. sometimes You get to know people's personality through the forums and sometimes they can lead to finding some special people to take it further with privately. It's a strange fab world and we all just live in it
I've found some very special people through forum games. But they've never been the ones who start off with "here's me cock"....
That's me told
We should discuss your cock
Sssssh don't give away my secret identity "
Soz |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
It’s a really good question, and it’s one that occurs to me at times.
I think I can be a teeny bit flirty on occasion , but there are times when I dial back my flirting, because I wonder if it might be taken the wrong way, and I don’t want to give people the wrong impression.
|
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"I think that this is one of the things that I’ve found hardest to fathom since my return and I know that Amana feels the same, as we’ve discussed it. Mainly just the sheer volume of flirting, often between the same few folks, which actually seems to signify very little interest. It confuses us both as to who is interested, is anyone at all?
Obviously people are free to do what they want but sometimes trying to pick out genuine interest is like trying to hear a mouse squeak in a Metallica concert!
Also, if someone is flirting all the time with lots of folks on the forums, how can you tell if they’re actually genuine?
I had a conversation with someone the other week about my ooft threads and what their actual purpose is, because all they see is people writing ooft! to each other!
I don’t have an issue with people enjoying themselves and it can be fun but I find it confusing and a little bit exclusionary when it’s dialled up to
11 all the time
I see that point, most definitely.
That's why I like your ooft threads and similar, it gives a chance to actually engage with people you may actually find appealing in private without it being unsolicited.
My thoughts have always been that the "intent based" flirting is in the inbox, and I'm happy with an approach, just not an assumption. If that makes sense?"
That makes perfect sense!
I’m very similar in that any intent is through messages, my ooft threads were/are intended to facilitate that type of connection.
I can’t say that I’ve ever seen forum threads as an invite though. Maybe as a stepping point for discussion or further conversation to build a connection but never as a green light.
There’s a whole world between and meeting |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I had to stop myself in a forum game yesterday.
Obviously I'm not worried about people messaging our account but I worry about getting carried away, having an interaction and then messaging someone and me having the wrong idea.
Better for me to stick to boring threads and leave the flirting for socials
There's the rub.... a lot of us are getting our flirt on here because there are no socials!"
Dont get me wrong. I'm not saying you (a collective you, not you specificly) shouldn't flirt.
Flirt your hearts out. Go nuts. Have fun. Find someone who makes your bits go warm and tingly. That's what this place is for. And yes people might take it the wrong way but its fab. People get the wrong idea all the time.
But for me it's not a good idea. I'm not willing to post pictures of myself or to be more open so I'm setting myself up for failure and mental pain. I miss flirting so much but I will just have to be patient |
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Yes they do. But I take things literally, hence why I assumed you were Bi Posh as you know
I thought half the females on here were actually having all girl orgys
Some of the guys are having 10 plus women on the go at once
Etc etc
This is why I don't join in with them as I flirt for real |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"It’s a really good question, and it’s one that occurs to me at times.
I think I can be a teeny bit flirty on occasion , but there are times when I dial back my flirting, because I wonder if it might be taken the wrong way, and I don’t want to give people the wrong impression.
"
I think that there’s always a balance between what we’re saying how it’s going to be seen by others, it’s about picking the audience.
Fab is a complex pool of mixed signals at times. After all, we’re here talking about sex, with our bodies on show, whilst also dealing in respect and consent |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I’m no Spring chicken; rather boringly old school, I’d say. I can’t tell what’s the difference between flirting and complimenting. I have complimented and was told that I had flirted.
I’m very confused.
Does the world not know how to take a compliment without making it into something more than that anymore? It has made me more reticent to engage in more of a conversation, I must admit. |
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"It's an open forum game. My serious flirting goes on in PMs. Yes, sometimes forum flirting leads to that, it certainly can give you an idea of their sense if humour and wether you would click or not.
There's some on the forums I flirt outrageously with, but they know from private messages that our meets would be social only, it's just sometimes nice to be a little cheeky!
I keep it all in the forums. I'm not brave enough to take it outside of there.
I don't know how an unsolicited message would go and I certainly wouldn't want to offend, upset or make anyone uncomfortable.
*splutters on coffee*
Netflix button? Although that wasn't unsolicited "
And speaking of which.... It still hasn't dried out or even worked right since that itch/scratch business!!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It’s a really good question, and it’s one that occurs to me at times.
I think I can be a teeny bit flirty on occasion , but there are times when I dial back my flirting, because I wonder if it might be taken the wrong way, and I don’t want to give people the wrong impression.
I think that there’s always a balance between what we’re saying how it’s going to be seen by others, it’s about picking the audience.
Fab is a complex pool of mixed signals at times. After all, we’re here talking about sex, with our bodies on show, whilst also dealing in respect and consent "
I tend to stick to people that I know more, because I feel a bit safer, rather than strangers, which is probably not very inclusive, but I’m protecting myself I guess. |
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I think forums and challenges are good to engage in conversation if anyone interests you there. I find it more friendly and more fun. However, it doesn’t mean that I’m giving a green light of meeting and probably every sensible person is aware of that |
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I have sent pms and have had them too. I would expect them to be treated exactly as a pm in any other situation with the recipients free to do what they want. I fail to see any problem here. There should never be an anticipation of any reaction and as usual no response is not interested. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I think forums and challenges are good to engage in conversation if anyone interests you there. I find it more friendly and more fun. However, it doesn’t mean that I’m giving a green light of meeting and probably every sensible person is aware of that "
This is sooo relatable. 
I should put this on my bio.
|
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"It’s a really good question, and it’s one that occurs to me at times.
I think I can be a teeny bit flirty on occasion , but there are times when I dial back my flirting, because I wonder if it might be taken the wrong way, and I don’t want to give people the wrong impression.
I think that there’s always a balance between what we’re saying how it’s going to be seen by others, it’s about picking the audience.
Fab is a complex pool of mixed signals at times. After all, we’re here talking about sex, with our bodies on show, whilst also dealing in respect and consent
I tend to stick to people that I know more, because I feel a bit safer, rather than strangers, which is probably not very inclusive, but I’m protecting myself I guess. "
That’s kind of my point.
I think that it’s a bit of a fallacy that we should include everyone in everything that we do, it’s not our jobs to engage with every single person who posts or replies.
Being inclusive doesn’t mean treating everyone the same way |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I have sent pms and have had them too. I would expect them to be treated exactly as a pm in any other situation with the recipients free to do what they want. I fail to see any problem here. There should never be an anticipation of any reaction and as usual no response is not interested. "
And your opinion is completely valid, but that’s your take on things, and others take it differently I think.
I think for me, I wouldn’t want to feel like I was leading someone one maybe?
|
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"I think forums and challenges are good to engage in conversation if anyone interests you there. I find it more friendly and more fun. However, it doesn’t mean that I’m giving a green light of meeting and probably every sensible person is aware of that
This is sooo relatable.
I should put this on my bio.
"
you shall use it as your own |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"It's an open forum game. My serious flirting goes on in PMs. Yes, sometimes forum flirting leads to that, it certainly can give you an idea of their sense if humour and wether you would click or not.
There's some on the forums I flirt outrageously with, but they know from private messages that our meets would be social only, it's just sometimes nice to be a little cheeky!
I keep it all in the forums. I'm not brave enough to take it outside of there.
I don't know how an unsolicited message would go and I certainly wouldn't want to offend, upset or make anyone uncomfortable.
*splutters on coffee*
Netflix button? Although that wasn't unsolicited
And speaking of which.... It still hasn't dried out or even worked right since that itch/scratch business!! "
Seems to work alright for me. But definitely not dried out |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I think that this is one of the things that I’ve found hardest to fathom since my return and I know that Amana feels the same, as we’ve discussed it. Mainly just the sheer volume of flirting, often between the same few folks, which actually seems to signify very little interest. It confuses us both as to who is interested, is anyone at all?
Obviously people are free to do what they want but sometimes trying to pick out genuine interest is like trying to hear a mouse squeak in a Metallica concert!
Also, if someone is flirting all the time with lots of folks on the forums, how can you tell if they’re actually genuine?
I had a conversation with someone the other week about my ooft threads and what their actual purpose is, because all they see is people writing ooft! to each other!
I don’t have an issue with people enjoying themselves and it can be fun but I find it confusing and a little bit exclusionary when it’s dialled up to
11 all the time
I see that point, most definitely.
That's why I like your ooft threads and similar, it gives a chance to actually engage with people you may actually find appealing in private without it being unsolicited.
My thoughts have always been that the "intent based" flirting is in the inbox, and I'm happy with an approach, just not an assumption. If that makes sense?
That makes perfect sense!
I’m very similar in that any intent is through messages, my ooft threads were/are intended to facilitate that type of connection.
I can’t say that I’ve ever seen forum threads as an invite though. Maybe as a stepping point for discussion or further conversation to build a connection but never as a green light.
There’s a whole world between and meeting "
Couldn't agree more.... |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I’m no Spring chicken; rather boringly old school, I’d say. I can’t tell what’s the difference between flirting and complimenting. I have complimented and was told that I had flirted.
I’m very confused.
Does the world not know how to take a compliment without making it into something more than that anymore? It has made me more reticent to engage in more of a conversation, I must admit."
I think part of the problem is that in any text based conversation there is so much missing that can be important.
And people are often looking for more positive affirmations especially at this time when in person is night on impossible. |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"It’s a really good question, and it’s one that occurs to me at times.
I think I can be a teeny bit flirty on occasion , but there are times when I dial back my flirting, because I wonder if it might be taken the wrong way, and I don’t want to give people the wrong impression.
I think that there’s always a balance between what we’re saying how it’s going to be seen by others, it’s about picking the audience.
Fab is a complex pool of mixed signals at times. After all, we’re here talking about sex, with our bodies on show, whilst also dealing in respect and consent
I tend to stick to people that I know more, because I feel a bit safer, rather than strangers, which is probably not very inclusive, but I’m protecting myself I guess. "
I think you do just fine beautiful |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I think forums and challenges are good to engage in conversation if anyone interests you there. I find it more friendly and more fun. However, it doesn’t mean that I’m giving a green light of meeting and probably every sensible person is aware of that "
I would hope so..... but the dodgy messages do say otherwise.
Challenges and games are definitely a fun way to engage though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It’s a really good question, and it’s one that occurs to me at times.
I think I can be a teeny bit flirty on occasion , but there are times when I dial back my flirting, because I wonder if it might be taken the wrong way, and I don’t want to give people the wrong impression.
I think that there’s always a balance between what we’re saying how it’s going to be seen by others, it’s about picking the audience.
Fab is a complex pool of mixed signals at times. After all, we’re here talking about sex, with our bodies on show, whilst also dealing in respect and consent
I tend to stick to people that I know more, because I feel a bit safer, rather than strangers, which is probably not very inclusive, but I’m protecting myself I guess.
I think you do just fine beautiful "
I’ll always flirt with you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I have sent pms and have had them too. I would expect them to be treated exactly as a pm in any other situation with the recipients free to do what they want. I fail to see any problem here. There should never be an anticipation of any reaction and as usual no response is not interested.
And your opinion is completely valid, but that’s your take on things, and others take it differently I think.
I think for me, I wouldn’t want to feel like I was leading someone one maybe?
"
I think that's a good distinction to make. It lessens the potential for pm drama or real world drama for that matter |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I have sent pms and have had them too. I would expect them to be treated exactly as a pm in any other situation with the recipients free to do what they want. I fail to see any problem here. There should never be an anticipation of any reaction and as usual no response is not interested. "
I think I struggle sometimes when it's a regular forum user purely because I don't like to upset people unless they really need it. Plus, it's often easier to get and flirt in "public" for me. |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I’d never flirt in a public forum game (the few times I get involved) with anyone I wouldn’t flirt with in private/would want to meet, so that is not a problem for me. "
That's probably sensible... |
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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
"Having a morning muse in the bath....
Do forum games send out wrong signals sometimes.
When a forum game is in full swing, with the flirting and the back and forth, do you find that people (men or women) presume they should take it as a green light to message privately or send spontaneous friend invites?
Does friendly accommodation into a forum game, and often outrageous forum flirting (obviously not from me what with my never being a flirt) give them the assumption that they will be meeting you at a later date?
Does a message from someone you've flirted wildly with on a thread make you think "ooh" or is it just more unsolicited mail? Or does it depend on who it is and whether you like the look and sound of them?"
I always take it that the flirtation and comments could be misinterpreted as a green light to message and assume they are interested. In some cases the games can act as a safety net, in so much that people can claim it was just harmless fun when their advances are rebuffed. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I have sent pms and have had them too. I would expect them to be treated exactly as a pm in any other situation with the recipients free to do what they want. I fail to see any problem here. There should never be an anticipation of any reaction and as usual no response is not interested.
I think I struggle sometimes when it's a regular forum user purely because I don't like to upset people unless they really need it. Plus, it's often easier to get and flirt in "public" for me."
I think this for me too. I’m trying to reply without sounding like an anxious over thinker, but truthfully, maybe I do overthink it at times.
I don’t want to lead people on, when it’s just a bit of fun. |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"Yes they do. But I take things literally, hence why I assumed you were Bi Posh as you know
I thought half the females on here were actually having all girl orgys
Some of the guys are having 10 plus women on the go at once
Etc etc
This is why I don't join in with them as I flirt for real "
You are always the voice of reason and level headed C.... to be honest you asking me all that time ago was what made me change my profile |
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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago
.. |
I don’t take forum flirting seriously. It’s just a giggle isn’t it? Occasionally there are those that think a game on the forums means you want more - fabbing photos seems to encourage that for some reason |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"Having a morning muse in the bath....
Do forum games send out wrong signals sometimes.
When a forum game is in full swing, with the flirting and the back and forth, do you find that people (men or women) presume they should take it as a green light to message privately or send spontaneous friend invites?
Does friendly accommodation into a forum game, and often outrageous forum flirting (obviously not from me what with my never being a flirt) give them the assumption that they will be meeting you at a later date?
Does a message from someone you've flirted wildly with on a thread make you think "ooh" or is it just more unsolicited mail? Or does it depend on who it is and whether you like the look and sound of them?
I always take it that the flirtation and comments could be misinterpreted as a green light to message and assume they are interested. In some cases the games can act as a safety net, in so much that people can claim it was just harmless fun when their advances are rebuffed."
I don't have an issue with the idea of a green light of attraction...
It's when it is taken as a green light to slip a penis in my box or ask when we are doing this for real that's the main query.... |
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"I think forums and challenges are good to engage in conversation if anyone interests you there. I find it more friendly and more fun. However, it doesn’t mean that I’m giving a green light of meeting and probably every sensible person is aware of that
I would hope so..... but the dodgy messages do say otherwise.
Challenges and games are definitely a fun way to engage though."
Well those happens either way but you are right , it raises the amount of weird messages time to time... on top of the ones triggered by any photo& status updates.
some win some loose hei |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I don’t take forum flirting seriously. It’s just a giggle isn’t it? Occasionally there are those that think a game on the forums means you want more - fabbing photos seems to encourage that for some reason "
I tend to wait for a wink..... that's when I actually think they might be. |
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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I think forums and challenges are good to engage in conversation if anyone interests you there. I find it more friendly and more fun. However, it doesn’t mean that I’m giving a green light of meeting and probably every sensible person is aware of that
I would hope so..... but the dodgy messages do say otherwise.
Challenges and games are definitely a fun way to engage though.
Well those happens either way but you are right , it raises the amount of weird messages time to time... on top of the ones triggered by any photo& status updates.
some win some loose hei "
The beautiful rainbow of life! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Having a morning muse in the bath....
Do forum games send out wrong signals sometimes.
When a forum game is in full swing, with the flirting and the back and forth, do you find that people (men or women) presume they should take it as a green light to message privately or send spontaneous friend invites?
Does friendly accommodation into a forum game, and often outrageous forum flirting (obviously not from me what with my never being a flirt) give them the assumption that they will be meeting you at a later date?
Does a message from someone you've flirted wildly with on a thread make you think "ooh" or is it just more unsolicited mail? Or does it depend on who it is and whether you like the look and sound of them?
I always take it that the flirtation and comments could be misinterpreted as a green light to message and assume they are interested. In some cases the games can act as a safety net, in so much that people can claim it was just harmless fun when their advances are rebuffed.
I don't have an issue with the idea of a green light of attraction...
It's when it is taken as a green light to slip a penis in my box or ask when we are doing this for real that's the main query...."
This for me too |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have spent too much time on the forums recently. They can be addictive and they do give a false sense of knowing people.
I can understand why people can move to pm's when there is no actual connection being made. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’m no Spring chicken; rather boringly old school, I’d say. I can’t tell what’s the difference between flirting and complimenting. I have complimented and was told that I had flirted.
I’m very confused.
Does the world not know how to take a compliment without making it into something more than that anymore? It has made me more reticent to engage in more of a conversation, I must admit.
I think part of the problem is that in any text based conversation there is so much missing that can be important.
And people are often looking for more positive affirmations especially at this time when in person is night on impossible."
Very astute observation about need for positive affirmation. Text based conversations lack the nuances of facial and body signals, which can make all the difference. Even the manner in which I deliver the compliment vocally perhaps. I suppose on a site where my naked torso is doing the talking, the natural assumption would be that I lean towards flirting rather than merely complimenting. |
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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
"I always take it that the flirtation and comments could be misinterpreted as a green light to message and assume they are interested. In some cases the games can act as a safety net, in so much that people can claim it was just harmless fun when their advances are rebuffed.
I don't have an issue with the idea of a green light of attraction...
It's when it is taken as a green light to slip a penis in my box or ask when we are doing this for real that's the main query...."
And thats where the fun stops.
Some people project their intent or desire to do a thing on the other person(s) that sent a flirtatious message.
The failure to communicate, to understand and appreciate that just because you say you want to do a thing doesn’t mean you do want to do a thing or to do a thing with that person.
Do you call these people out on their behaviour and let them know they misunderstood?
If so how do they react? |
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