FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Spontaneous meets
Spontaneous meets
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My first meet was a spontaneous one, a couple were staying in a nearby hotel and messaged me to come over. Was a first message to being naked within a couple of hours. Haha |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’ve done one meet (old account, pre lockdown) where we had talked quite a bit, but not had a social.
If we’d had a social I would not have met him for sex, as he wasn’t my type, but the meet was so hot, and I really enjoyed it.
I wouldn’t do it again, as it was a stupid risk really, even though I had done as much checking as I could. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've had mixed fortunes with spontaneous meets. Some have been amazingly hot but others have been quite scary (the man who used photos of his son and who brought handcuffs thinking I'd trust him enough to let him use them on me). They're not worth the worry for me so all are now planned. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When I first joined Fab I liked spontaneous meets they gave me a rush and I had some fun times.
Some  moments too
When I look back I was often careless and put myself in danger.
I know better now.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I do spontaneous cuppa socials and had a few surprises
Meets are tailored to my likes and a lot of time and effort is involved, I'd hate to rely on a unknown and it go wrong  "
Agree to a extent but meets should be tailored to both parties likes. I will only meet if my likes are met but equally i want to meet the person who i am mettings needs too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’ve done one meet (old account, pre lockdown) where we had talked quite a bit, but not had a social.
If we’d had a social I would not have met him for sex, as he wasn’t my type, but the meet was so hot, and I really enjoyed it.
I wouldn’t do it again, as it was a stupid risk really, even though I had done as much checking as I could."
Why was it a stupid risk? This is a sex site and you got sex. Is more people stopped all this high horse rubbish and actually got down to arranging what everyone is here for then more sex would be arranged with less timewasting. |
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"Usually my meets are planned in advance and always a social first
Thinking of changing how I use Fab after lockdown..
Who does them?
Any bad experiences with them?"
I like spontaneous meets , always a social first though , I have a short attention span and often lose interest if it takes months to arrange .
I'm also an useless penpal with strangers , there's only so many " how's u , what u up to , any plans for the weekend ?" I can answer before losing the will ...  |
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"I’ve done one meet (old account, pre lockdown) where we had talked quite a bit, but not had a social.
If we’d had a social I would not have met him for sex, as he wasn’t my type, but the meet was so hot, and I really enjoyed it.
I wouldn’t do it again, as it was a stupid risk really, even though I had done as much checking as I could.
Why was it a stupid risk? This is a sex site and you got sex. Is more people stopped all this high horse rubbish and actually got down to arranging what everyone is here for then more sex would be arranged with less timewasting."
The high horse of safety checks? My god I've heard everything |
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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
"Usually my meets are planned in advance and always a social first
Thinking of changing how I use Fab after lockdown..
Who does them?
Any bad experiences with them?"
How are you defining spontaneous?
No social just play?
Social leading to play with no gap?
Playing with little talking or planning before hand?
Spontaneous play can be good fun, but does run a few more risks.
We have so far not had any bad meets, but our quickest meet was still a week from first message to meeting in person.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My first ever meet was spontaneous, and I think I liked the not knowing part. Although I would like to meet people and have a social. Sometimes spontaneous hits the spot.!
We was supposed to be having a coffee and a chat but I think the work pants sold it for her!  |
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By *rder66Man
over a year ago
Tatooine |
DBS enhanced check, and a photo of their face holding a sign with my name, standing on one leg.
Passport or driver licence number.
It all depends on how safe you feel with them and your connection with them, only you and that person can decide that but, it is your safety which is most important. |
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"I’ve done one meet (old account, pre lockdown) where we had talked quite a bit, but not had a social.
If we’d had a social I would not have met him for sex, as he wasn’t my type, but the meet was so hot, and I really enjoyed it.
I wouldn’t do it again, as it was a stupid risk really, even though I had done as much checking as I could.
Why was it a stupid risk? This is a sex site and you got sex. Is more people stopped all this high horse rubbish and actually got down to arranging what everyone is here for then more sex would be arranged with less timewasting."
so what you are saying if fuck are safety and just get on with it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not for me. I like a bit of chatting first and then a social. Mostly because I'm so fussy, I can't handle the risk that I'll show up and not fancy them and then it'll be really awkward! |
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I prefer a quick social meet rather than endless messages over days/weeks, I get bored easily & easier to see if there's an attraction in person, you can talk about what you're looking for, etc. Sometimes some aren't great at wording or phrasing their messages but in person are lovely, also works the other way too, can come across as lovely over messages but not so in person.
Also cuts out the fantasist on here just wanting wank chat with no intention of ever meeting.
Have been know to meet someone for a social after the initial first message within an hour...but then I am pretty spontaneous
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"Usually my meets are planned in advance and always a social first
Thinking of changing how I use Fab after lockdown..
Who does them?
Any bad experiences with them?
How are you defining spontaneous?
No social just play?
Social leading to play with no gap?
Playing with little talking or planning before hand?
Spontaneous play can be good fun, but does run a few more risks.
We have so far not had any bad meets, but our quickest meet was still a week from first message to meeting in person.
"
I guess social leading to play straight away. Have never done it in all my time on Fab. Always made arrangements for afterwards. |
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"I’ve done one meet (old account, pre lockdown) where we had talked quite a bit, but not had a social.
If we’d had a social I would not have met him for sex, as he wasn’t my type, but the meet was so hot, and I really enjoyed it.
I wouldn’t do it again, as it was a stupid risk really, even though I had done as much checking as I could.
Why was it a stupid risk? This is a sex site and you got sex. Is more people stopped all this high horse rubbish and actually got down to arranging what everyone is here for then more sex would be arranged with less timewasting. so what you are saying if fuck are safety and just get on with it "
It is difficult for men to view safety in the same way as women, their risks are so much lower. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Most of my meets are spontaneous. Most of the time it's about what I am in the mood for that day.
I have found over the years the more in advance I arrange a meeting the more likely I am let down, so I am unlikely to arrange a meet more than a few days in advance.
I don't do social meets. I can't think of anything more tedious then sitting around talking dribble when I could be having fun. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not for me. I like a bit of chatting first and then a social. Mostly because I'm so fussy, I can't handle the risk that I'll show up and not fancy them and then it'll be really awkward!"
I think I’d want the ground to swallow me up if you got there and didn’t feel attracted to them! Worst fear  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Usually my meets are planned in advance and always a social first
Thinking of changing how I use Fab after lockdown..
Who does them?
Any bad experiences with them?"
I usually prefer to chat to people for a while before meeting to get to know them. But I have jumped in bed within an hour or so of first meeting guys and it's been fine xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Usually my meets are planned in advance and always a social first
Thinking of changing how I use Fab after lockdown..
Who does them?
Any bad experiences with them?"
Much prefer random far less pressure lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’ve done one meet (old account, pre lockdown) where we had talked quite a bit, but not had a social.
If we’d had a social I would not have met him for sex, as he wasn’t my type, but the meet was so hot, and I really enjoyed it.
I wouldn’t do it again, as it was a stupid risk really, even though I had done as much checking as I could.
Why was it a stupid risk? This is a sex site and you got sex. Is more people stopped all this high horse rubbish and actually got down to arranging what everyone is here for then more sex would be arranged with less timewasting."
Because I went to the hotel room of what was basically a complete stranger. I had done as much checking as I could, but it was still a stupid risk. There’s no high horse rubbish, that’s just bloody common sense!
I put myself in a potentially dangerous situation, and as it happens it was a good decision, but it could also have gone horribly wrong. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Most of my meets have a large element of spontaneity to them because I don't want to let anyone down and planning in advance that can happen when you have a family. So I tend to just meet who ever I have been chatting to lately if they are available to meet when I am, usually on the day. I enjoy the spontaneity to though, that adds to it for me. I think the longer in advance I plan something I can get bored of the planning stages. I just like to meet and if it works then meeting regular is a bonus I find. Good luck  |
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"I’ve done one meet (old account, pre lockdown) where we had talked quite a bit, but not had a social.
If we’d had a social I would not have met him for sex, as he wasn’t my type, but the meet was so hot, and I really enjoyed it.
I wouldn’t do it again, as it was a stupid risk really, even though I had done as much checking as I could.
Why was it a stupid risk? This is a sex site and you got sex. Is more people stopped all this high horse rubbish and actually got down to arranging what everyone is here for then more sex would be arranged with less timewasting."
Mansplaining the risks women take meeting strangers on the internet ... FML
I prefer the getting to know build up and my free time is usually planned in advance but always happy for last minute meets with friends. |
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"I’ve done one meet (old account, pre lockdown) where we had talked quite a bit, but not had a social.
If we’d had a social I would not have met him for sex, as he wasn’t my type, but the meet was so hot, and I really enjoyed it.
I wouldn’t do it again, as it was a stupid risk really, even though I had done as much checking as I could.
Why was it a stupid risk? This is a sex site and you got sex. Is more people stopped all this high horse rubbish and actually got down to arranging what everyone is here for then more sex would be arranged with less timewasting."
Obviously us women have more to worry about than you men.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’ve done one meet (old account, pre lockdown) where we had talked quite a bit, but not had a social.
If we’d had a social I would not have met him for sex, as he wasn’t my type, but the meet was so hot, and I really enjoyed it.
I wouldn’t do it again, as it was a stupid risk really, even though I had done as much checking as I could.
Why was it a stupid risk? This is a sex site and you got sex. Is more people stopped all this high horse rubbish and actually got down to arranging what everyone is here for then more sex would be arranged with less timewasting.
The high horse of safety checks? My god I've heard everything"
What im saying is most people are just after no drama sex and are not axe murderers. Yes you might get the odd idiot but most are not here to harm anyone. Makeimg out everyone is going to draw attention to themselves by behaving silly is just not right. As a man i too am in danger of crazy women but i know that most on here just want no hassle so i take that small risk. Nothing is risk free but i would say most on here are not looking to cause another user harm. X |
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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
"I guess social leading to play straight away. Have never done it in all my time on Fab. Always made arrangements for afterwards."
Some will say that travelling some distance for a social and no play is unreasonable. However, there should never be an expectation or assumption of anything regardless of what has been talked about before hand.
Assuming you are happy with the checks you have done, and the vibe from the social, then playing the same day can be lots of fun.
Have you ever had a social where you have not wanted to take it further? If so, how would you ensure you reduced the potential for mistakes?
Do you need time to process the social and then determine you want to play?
How many times have you left a social and thought about how you wanted to play that day?
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By *rder66Man
over a year ago
Tatooine |
"Usually my meets are planned in advance and always a social first
Thinking of changing how I use Fab after lockdown..
Who does them?
Any bad experiences with them?
How are you defining spontaneous?
No social just play?
Social leading to play with no gap?
Playing with little talking or planning before hand?
Spontaneous play can be good fun, but does run a few more risks.
We have so far not had any bad meets, but our quickest meet was still a week from first message to meeting in person.
I guess social leading to play straight away. Have never done it in all my time on Fab. Always made arrangements for afterwards."
You're an intelligent woman and I would say, if you have talked to them or even met them before, so long as you have a get away planned incase things where not as they seemed. Dependant on the person you where meeting.
Cover your own back, do your checks, go for it, lucky person.
I'll have the engine running in the car if you need a get-away driver. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Obviously us women have more to worry about than you men.
"
Again your lumping all mem together. We are just as much at risk of wonen with bad intentions as you are but again most on here are not looking to harm others. I take my personel safety very seriously so i walk with keys in hand cross the road etc its not just women who are at risk from idiots tho i can take your point x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’ve done one meet (old account, pre lockdown) where we had talked quite a bit, but not had a social.
If we’d had a social I would not have met him for sex, as he wasn’t my type, but the meet was so hot, and I really enjoyed it.
I wouldn’t do it again, as it was a stupid risk really, even though I had done as much checking as I could.
Why was it a stupid risk? This is a sex site and you got sex. Is more people stopped all this high horse rubbish and actually got down to arranging what everyone is here for then more sex would be arranged with less timewasting."
Because not everyone enjoys putting themselves in stupid situations, not everyone wants mediocre sex (as most know sex is actually better with a good mental connection) and because on a swingers site it's a known fact that there is a lot more to have enjoyable times than 'just' turning up for a sex session with just anyone! |
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By *rder66Man
over a year ago
Tatooine |
"
Obviously us women have more to worry about than you men.
Again your lumping all mem together. We are just as much at risk of wonen with bad intentions as you are but again most on here are not looking to harm others. I take my personel safety very seriously so i walk with keys in hand cross the road etc its not just women who are at risk from idiots tho i can take your point x"
A woman going into a hotel room with a bad man who is intent on harming her compared to a man walking into a hotel room wanting to harm him isn't realy comparable in the risk factor. Both can cause harm but a man has a better chance off getting out unscathed. |
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Have you ever had a social where you have not wanted to take it further?
Yes I have and I guess that's why its always just been a social with nothing else promised.
How many times have you left a social and thought about how you wanted to play that day
On several occasions |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’ve done one meet (old account, pre lockdown) where we had talked quite a bit, but not had a social.
If we’d had a social I would not have met him for sex, as he wasn’t my type, but the meet was so hot, and I really enjoyed it.
I wouldn’t do it again, as it was a stupid risk really, even though I had done as much checking as I could.
Why was it a stupid risk? This is a sex site and you got sex. Is more people stopped all this high horse rubbish and actually got down to arranging what everyone is here for then more sex would be arranged with less timewasting.
The high horse of safety checks? My god I've heard everything
What im saying is most people are just after no drama sex and are not axe murderers. Yes you might get the odd idiot but most are not here to harm anyone. Makeimg out everyone is going to draw attention to themselves by behaving silly is just not right. As a man i too am in danger of crazy women but i know that most on here just want no hassle so i take that small risk. Nothing is risk free but i would say most on here are not looking to cause another user harm. X"
And the key word is ‘most’. You’re absolutely right, but there is still a risk, and I increased my risk by going to a room with a stranger, which was stupid. |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
I think the way a lot of people are likely to do things has changed, partly because a lot of us have spent a lot of time getting to know people throughout lockdown.
Saying that, I never make a promise of play on a first meet and that won't change, because there is no way of knowing if there will be a spark in person.
Even if I'm travelling the million miles I'm likely to be to meet them I still make no promises, might just end up as a coffee. But in that situation I will have got to know them well enough to know we will have fun even if we don't want to rip each others clothes off. |
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"I’ve done one meet (old account, pre lockdown) where we had talked quite a bit, but not had a social.
If we’d had a social I would not have met him for sex, as he wasn’t my type, but the meet was so hot, and I really enjoyed it.
I wouldn’t do it again, as it was a stupid risk really, even though I had done as much checking as I could.
Why was it a stupid risk? This is a sex site and you got sex. Is more people stopped all this high horse rubbish and actually got down to arranging what everyone is here for then more sex would be arranged with less timewasting.
The high horse of safety checks? My god I've heard everything
What im saying is most people are just after no drama sex and are not axe murderers. Yes you might get the odd idiot but most are not here to harm anyone. Makeimg out everyone is going to draw attention to themselves by behaving silly is just not right. As a man i too am in danger of crazy women but i know that most on here just want no hassle so i take that small risk. Nothing is risk free but i would say most on here are not looking to cause another user harm. X"
So I check, as best I can, for the odd idiot. I'm sorry that upsets you, but I like going home in one piece. |
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By *ljamMan
over a year ago
Edinburgh |
"
Obviously us women have more to worry about than you men.
Again your lumping all mem together. We are just as much at risk of wonen with bad intentions as you are but again most on here are not looking to harm others. I take my personel safety very seriously so i walk with keys in hand cross the road etc its not just women who are at risk from idiots tho i can take your point x"
If you really think men are at as much risk as women going into a meet then there no helping you. That's absolutely nuts. |
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"Usually my meets are planned in advance and always a social first
Thinking of changing how I use Fab after lockdown..
Who does them?
Any bad experiences with them?"
A bit of a mix bag. Had some good spontaneous and a few calamitous ones |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I am confused what do you talking about on a social meet???? as it seems to be at coffee shop where you can't really talk openly about what you want in regards to sex / fucking which at the end of the day why we are on a swinging site. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’ve done one meet (old account, pre lockdown) where we had talked quite a bit, but not had a social.
If we’d had a social I would not have met him for sex, as he wasn’t my type, but the meet was so hot, and I really enjoyed it.
I wouldn’t do it again, as it was a stupid risk really, even though I had done as much checking as I could.
Why was it a stupid risk? This is a sex site and you got sex. Is more people stopped all this high horse rubbish and actually got down to arranging what everyone is here for then more sex would be arranged with less timewasting.
The high horse of safety checks? My god I've heard everything
What im saying is most people are just after no drama sex and are not axe murderers. Yes you might get the odd idiot but most are not here to harm anyone. Makeimg out everyone is going to draw attention to themselves by behaving silly is just not right. As a man i too am in danger of crazy women but i know that most on here just want no hassle so i take that small risk. Nothing is risk free but i would say most on here are not looking to cause another user harm. X"
Always fun to be a murderer's first catch.  |
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"I’ve done one meet (old account, pre lockdown) where we had talked quite a bit, but not had a social.
If we’d had a social I would not have met him for sex, as he wasn’t my type, but the meet was so hot, and I really enjoyed it.
I wouldn’t do it again, as it was a stupid risk really, even though I had done as much checking as I could.
Why was it a stupid risk? This is a sex site and you got sex. Is more people stopped all this high horse rubbish and actually got down to arranging what everyone is here for then more sex would be arranged with less timewasting."
And this attitude is exactly what many women want to find out before they’re unfortunate enough to find themselves alone ^ |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Obviously us women have more to worry about than you men.
Again your lumping all mem together. We are just as much at risk of wonen with bad intentions as you are but again most on here are not looking to harm others. I take my personel safety very seriously so i walk with keys in hand cross the road etc its not just women who are at risk from idiots tho i can take your point x
If you really think men are at as much risk as women going into a meet then there no helping you. That's absolutely nuts. "
I never said that i said there is still a risk as idiots come in all forms and the women could be bait for you to get mugged etc. I judge my own risk if doing straight away meets but most of the time i will meet a women but make it clear that sex may not be on the menu and it may just be a polite drink which has happened a few times before as i felt it wasnt right etc |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I am confused what do you talking about on a social meet???? as it seems to be at coffee shop where you can't really talk openly about what you want in regards to sex / fucking which at the end of the day why we are on a swinging site. "
I've always had social meets at a coffee shop/cafe/pub and been able to talk about exactly what I want openly, absolutely no issues there. |
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By *rder66Man
over a year ago
Tatooine |
Talk to him/her perfore you meet, get to know each other as much as possible.
Do your safety check and discuss these with whomever.
Have a get out if needed.
If all is good, enjoy each other.
Ultimitly only you can make that decision and the final decision should be yours. |
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"I am confused what do you talking about on a social meet???? as it seems to be at coffee shop where you can't really talk openly about what you want in regards to sex / fucking which at the end of the day why we are on a swinging site. "
This why I like takeaway cuppa socials outdoors, especially if its filled with men who are listening as the conversation invariably turns to fab topics |
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"I am confused what do you talking about on a social meet???? as it seems to be at coffee shop where you can't really talk openly about what you want in regards to sex / fucking which at the end of the day why we are on a swinging site. "
I've never had a problem |
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By *ljamMan
over a year ago
Edinburgh |
"
Obviously us women have more to worry about than you men.
Again your lumping all mem together. We are just as much at risk of wonen with bad intentions as you are but again most on here are not looking to harm others. I take my personel safety very seriously so i walk with keys in hand cross the road etc its not just women who are at risk from idiots tho i can take your point x
If you really think men are at as much risk as women going into a meet then there no helping you. That's absolutely nuts.
I never said that i said there is still a risk as idiots come in all forms and the women could be bait for you to get mugged etc. I judge my own risk if doing straight away meets but most of the time i will meet a women but make it clear that sex may not be on the menu and it may just be a polite drink which has happened a few times before as i felt it wasnt right etc "
Eh?! You said exactly that:
"Again your lumping all mem together. We are just as much at risk of wonen with bad intentions as you are"
It's a crazy suggestion...
I've had a couple of great spontaneous meets, but I'm never going to criticise anyone for considering their safety. It's ludicrous. |
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"I’ve done one meet (old account, pre lockdown) where we had talked quite a bit, but not had a social.
If we’d had a social I would not have met him for sex, as he wasn’t my type, but the meet was so hot, and I really enjoyed it.
I wouldn’t do it again, as it was a stupid risk really, even though I had done as much checking as I could.
Why was it a stupid risk? This is a sex site and you got sex. Is more people stopped all this high horse rubbish and actually got down to arranging what everyone is here for then more sex would be arranged with less timewasting.
The high horse of safety checks? My god I've heard everything
What im saying is most people are just after no drama sex and are not axe murderers. Yes you might get the odd idiot but most are not here to harm anyone. Makeimg out everyone is going to draw attention to themselves by behaving silly is just not right. As a man i too am in danger of crazy women but i know that most on here just want no hassle so i take that small risk. Nothing is risk free but i would say most on here are not looking to cause another user harm. X"
 the fact that you think the risks men take abs women take when meeting strangers are the same of mind blowing. |
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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
"Have you ever had a social where you have not wanted to take it further?
Yes I have and I guess that's why its always just been a social with nothing else promised.
How many times have you left a social and thought about how you wanted to play that day
On several occasions "
Have you found that the time between the social and eventual play date has helped make the play date more fun, or do you think it may result in over promising and under delivering?
I wouldn’t compromise an already working system on the back of trying to regain lost time for last year unless you felt that it would benefit you.
What do you think you would gain by not having a gap between social and play dates? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I've done spontaneous socials. Unfortunately some seem to think social means sex. Never met them again. "
I always make it clear to a meet that its just a social and no promise of sex. If they get funny then i would just cancel the social as cant be doing with bitch strops and im sure you wouldnt want a mardy man in the same situation |
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"Usually my meets are planned in advance and always a social first
Thinking of changing how I use Fab after lockdown..
Who does them?
Any bad experiences with them?"
Had a few spontaneous meets last year, I like them as I can’t always be bothered or have time with huge online conversations.
I think you know within a few seconds of meeting if there’s chemistry , it’s instinct and intuition, you sane a lot of time and get to meet a few weirdos
what’s the worse that can happen? Just be careful if going to someone’s house it be awkward and sometimes difficult to get away.... even for a guy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Done them in the past hit or miss really if the one person turns up
But I only do them on the back end off meets
Always upfront and tell them though that I am on the back end off a meet just poped on to level a verified
Still dressed and ready can meet if you don’t mind seconds
Other wise my meets are normal planed as it takes a lot off time to get ready |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I am confused what do you talking about on a social meet???? as it seems to be at coffee shop where you can't really talk openly about what you want in regards to sex / fucking which at the end of the day why we are on a swinging site. "
All my socials are just socials and fun, a laugh really ... any talk about sex would be later and done in private. I just want to know the person and if we have the illusive spark, as well as the ability to chat and laugh. Maybe because I find the brain is the sexist thing? |
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"I am confused what do you talking about on a social meet???? as it seems to be at coffee shop where you can't really talk openly about what you want in regards to sex / fucking which at the end of the day why we are on a swinging site. "
The weather, current events, hobbies, Fab in ways where it's not obvious what you're talking about to outsiders.
If you don't care, it's a way to read their body language and reactions, which helps figure out if you feel you can trust this person. |
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By *JohnMan
over a year ago
Newcastle upon Tyne |
I've had a few socials end up in the hotel room. That had been the intention of both of us from the start, but it's good to have a chance to check each other out first. And it's nice to get out and have a meal and conversation with someone.
I wouldn't call them 'spontaneous' though, as they'd been preceded by online getting to know each other.
The only true spontaneous I do is in clubs. "Hello, can I join you?" (some time later) "By the way, what's your name?". Clubs are different. |
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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
"I am confused what do you talking about on a social meet???? as it seems to be at coffee shop where you can't really talk openly about what you want in regards to sex / fucking which at the end of the day why we are on a swinging site. "
You can talk about sex and fucking without it being blatant. Innuendo, and humour come in handy.
But it depends what you want to get out of a meet. We don’t just meet for sex. What we do requires trust, which can only be built by getting to know one another.
Our last social the conversation just flowed. I couldn’t tell you what we talked about, but it didn’t drag or feel hard work. It was meant to be for an hour but ended up being 2-3 instead.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I've done spontaneous socials. Unfortunately some seem to think social means sex. Never met them again.
I always make it clear to a meet that its just a social and no promise of sex. If they get funny then i would just cancel the social as cant be doing with bitch strops and im sure you wouldnt want a mardy man in the same situation "
Bitch strops? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Spontaneous impulsive social meet... Yes.
Agreeing to be intimate with someone before we had met... Maybe not. Can see profiles and think hell yes but I'd need the initial social meet before anything else. Not dissing those who do though, all down to what works for the individual |
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Most of my meets are usually well planned
But I like the idea of a spontaneous meet
But it would be better as a spontaneous social with an option of somewhere to go if the two of you can’t keep your hands off each other  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I do spontaneous blowjob meets, with folk I chat to.
“Dave, fancy a blow job?”
“Not arf Luna!”
So we meet up, I suck him off and then off I toddle home. "
*Takes note...
**Changes name to Dave... |
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"Have you found that the time between the social and eventual play date has helped make the play date more fun, or do you think it may result in over promising and under delivering?
They have always turned out more than expected as we've had the time in-between to tease from the social
I wouldn’t compromise an already working system on the back of trying to regain lost time for last year unless you felt that it would benefit you.
I rarely met before Covid so it's not about trying to regain this past year.
What do you think you would gain by not having a gap between social and play dates?"
Now that I think about it, probably not a lot x |
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"I am confused what do you talking about on a social meet???? as it seems to be at coffee shop where you can't really talk openly about what you want in regards to sex / fucking which at the end of the day why we are on a swinging site.
The weather, current events, hobbies, Fab in ways where it's not obvious what you're talking about to outsiders.
If you don't care, it's a way to read their body language and reactions, which helps figure out if you feel you can trust this person."
Gives you a chance to have a look at them, check for things like scratches on the face from previous victim, blood spatters in their hair and across their dirty tee shirt, cum stains down their jeans, gore encrusted knife or garrote wire in the raggy tesco* carrier bag they are clutching...
*Other supermarket carrier bags are available for lugging murder weapons about in. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Usually my meets are planned in advance and always a social first
Thinking of changing how I use Fab after lockdown..
Who does them?
Any bad experiences with them?"
We’ve only ever done one spontaneous meet with a couple that were local to us , they messaged us one Saturday evening asking to meet up & as we hadn’t got anything planned that night we met them , to be honest it was one of the best Fab meets we’ve encountered. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I am confused what do you talking about on a social meet???? as it seems to be at coffee shop where you can't really talk openly about what you want in regards to sex / fucking which at the end of the day why we are on a swinging site.
The weather, current events, hobbies, Fab in ways where it's not obvious what you're talking about to outsiders.
If you don't care, it's a way to read their body language and reactions, which helps figure out if you feel you can trust this person.
Gives you a chance to have a look at them, check for things like scratches on the face from previous victim, blood spatters in their hair and across their dirty tee shirt, cum stains down their jeans, gore encrusted knife or garrote wire in the raggy tesco* carrier bag they are clutching...
*Other supermarket carrier bags are available for lugging murder weapons about in."
|
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"I am confused what do you talking about on a social meet???? as it seems to be at coffee shop where you can't really talk openly about what you want in regards to sex / fucking which at the end of the day why we are on a swinging site.
The weather, current events, hobbies, Fab in ways where it's not obvious what you're talking about to outsiders.
If you don't care, it's a way to read their body language and reactions, which helps figure out if you feel you can trust this person.
Gives you a chance to have a look at them, check for things like scratches on the face from previous victim, blood spatters in their hair and across their dirty tee shirt, cum stains down their jeans, gore encrusted knife or garrote wire in the raggy tesco* carrier bag they are clutching...
*Other supermarket carrier bags are available for lugging murder weapons about in."
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
to be honest i would find it hard to do spontaneous meet unless it's local did do in past when a local meet fell through but i be abit unsure if there was distance due bad experiences |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I've done spontaneous socials. Unfortunately some seem to think social means sex. Never met them again.
I always make it clear to a meet that its just a social and no promise of sex. If they get funny then i would just cancel the social as cant be doing with bitch strops and im sure you wouldnt want a mardy man in the same situation "
Same. It's a good way of seeing how mardy they get when someone says "no". |
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"I’ve done one meet (old account, pre lockdown) where we had talked quite a bit, but not had a social.
If we’d had a social I would not have met him for sex, as he wasn’t my type, but the meet was so hot, and I really enjoyed it.
I wouldn’t do it again, as it was a stupid risk really, even though I had done as much checking as I could.
Why was it a stupid risk? This is a sex site and you got sex. Is more people stopped all this high horse rubbish and actually got down to arranging what everyone is here for then more sex would be arranged with less timewasting.
The high horse of safety checks? My god I've heard everything
What im saying is most people are just after no drama sex and are not axe murderers. Yes you might get the odd idiot but most are not here to harm anyone. Makeimg out everyone is going to draw attention to themselves by behaving silly is just not right. As a man i too am in danger of crazy women but i know that most on here just want no hassle so i take that small risk. Nothing is risk free but i would say most on here are not looking to cause another user harm. X"
The problem is you only need to meet the one guy that is dangerous and things can go bad very quickly. Doesn’t matter if you have had 99 great meets. That 1 guy can ruin your life. Why shouldn’t I be allowed to try and feel safe |
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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
"Have you found that the time between the social and eventual play date has helped make the play date more fun, or do you think it may result in over promising and under delivering?
They have always turned out more than expected as we've had the time in-between to tease from the social
I wouldn’t compromise an already working system on the back of trying to regain lost time for last year unless you felt that it would benefit you.
I rarely met before Covid so it's not about trying to regain this past year.
What do you think you would gain by not having a gap between social and play dates?
Now that I think about it, probably not a lot x"
There is rarely a right or wrong answer, only informed decision making. If you feel you stand to gain very little from changing it up, then don’t do it, especially if you enjoy the post social banter and tease!
Personally I feel that there is room for both spontaneous and planned meets. However, as much as I enjoy playing when we first meet people, planning meets is vital for us to ensure we all have a safe and fun time. |
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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
"Gives you a chance to have a look at them, check for things like scratches on the face from previous victim, blood spatters in their hair and across their dirty tee shirt, cum stains down their jeans, gore encrusted knife or garrote wire in the raggy tesco* carrier bag they are clutching...
*Other supermarket carrier bags are available for lugging murder weapons about in."
Mine are typically in my little wheeled black cabin case. Carrier bags have no style and the things get all jumbled up together! |
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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
South Wales |
"I do spontaneous blowjob meets, with folk I chat to.
“Dave, fancy a blow job?”
“Not arf Luna!”
So we meet up, I suck him off and then off I toddle home.
*Takes note...
**Changes name to Dave... "
ding dong |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Gives you a chance to have a look at them, check for things like scratches on the face from previous victim, blood spatters in their hair and across their dirty tee shirt, cum stains down their jeans, gore encrusted knife or garrote wire in the raggy tesco* carrier bag they are clutching...
*Other supermarket carrier bags are available for lugging murder weapons about in.
Mine are typically in my little wheeled black cabin case. Carrier bags have no style and the things get all jumbled up together!"
Bags used for meat should be kept separate from the others. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I prefer a quick social meet rather than endless messages over days/weeks, I get bored easily & easier to see if there's an attraction in person, you can talk about what you're looking for, etc. Sometimes some aren't great at wording or phrasing their messages but in person are lovely, also works the other way too, can come across as lovely over messages but not so in person.
Also cuts out the fantasist on here just wanting wank chat with no intention of ever meeting.
Have been know to meet someone for a social after the initial first message within an hour...but then I am pretty spontaneous
"
100% agree with everything you said. I'm the same. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I prefer a quick social meet rather than endless messages over days/weeks, I get bored easily & easier to see if there's an attraction in person, you can talk about what you're looking for, etc. Sometimes some aren't great at wording or phrasing their messages but in person are lovely, also works the other way too, can come across as lovely over messages but not so in person.
Also cuts out the fantasist on here just wanting wank chat with no intention of ever meeting.
Have been know to meet someone for a social after the initial first message within an hour...but then I am pretty spontaneous
100% agree with everything you said. I'm the same. "
we had a social meet ? haha |
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"Most of my meets have a large element of spontaneity to them because I don't want to let anyone down and planning in advance that can happen when you have a family. So I tend to just meet who ever I have been chatting to lately if they are available to meet when I am, usually on the day. I enjoy the spontaneity to though, that adds to it for me. I think the longer in advance I plan something I can get bored of the planning stages. I just like to meet and if it works then meeting regular is a bonus I find. Good luck "
This is probably most like what i do, if i'm free (which is often spontaneous) & horny first offer goes to those I've met before. I have met randoms, randomly from here, never had a worse than a no show (probably thought i was having them on tbh) & those would be in public place to start regardless and usually in car tbh.
I always been spontaneous in meeting folk even away from fab, like the one night stand guy from pub/club.
I likes the variety, greedy bitch & tend to find diff guys for different kinks, rarely can i find one that fits all lol. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've had some spontaneous meets in the past and all 3 were very disappointing... Cat=Fish...all way older than said also... Shock horror for me...
Met them on another site... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I do spontaneous blowjob meets, with folk I chat to.
“Dave, fancy a blow job?”
“Not arf Luna!”
So we meet up, I suck him off and then off I toddle home. "
In seriousness its actually suprising the amount of women who are wanting quick blow job meets as oppposed to sex. Had someone msg for exactly this a few years ago when i was in the area. Was nervous etc but it was good and exciting to be fair |
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