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Fake it to Make It ?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Ever put on a happy face for others when you were feeling down ?
Ever blagged your way into a job with a confident interview when you were really a bag of nerves ?
Is it dishonest to sometimes put on an act, or has it worked for you ?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Ever put on a happy face for others when you were feeling down ?
Every day of every year of my existence. Wow that was deep!"
Thanks, and I feel that. Not every day but yes sometimes I do too. |
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It's only dishonest imo if you're deceiving someone into doing something they normally wouldn't. I've never blagged my way into a job but I'm very practiced at putting on a good face for my parents when my mum is very sick. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's only dishonest imo if you're deceiving someone into doing something they normally wouldn't. I've never blagged my way into a job but I'm very practiced at putting on a good face for my parents when my mum is very sick."
That's a good way to put it. Out of necessity rather than malice or deception? |
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Maybe it is dishonest but when dealing with emergencies in work I've often had to maintain the appearance of being calm and collected for the sake of others when inside my head I'm saying "shit shit shit shit". |
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"Ever put on a happy face for others when you were feeling down ?
Ever blagged your way into a job with a confident interview when you were really a bag of nerves ?
Is it dishonest to sometimes put on an act, or has it worked for you ?
"
Yes, especially at work over this past year when all I wanted to do was cry x
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Maybe it is dishonest but when dealing with emergencies in work I've often had to maintain the appearance of being calm and collected for the sake of others when inside my head I'm saying "shit shit shit shit". "
I don't think that's dishonest. Its the right professional decision at that moment. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Tears of a clown. Smokey Robbinson
https://youtu.be/ZaMX0Cs5Bc4
Thanks Woody. A classic and one of my favourite singers."
Your welcome. I think this says what a lot now know about people. (Celebritiy stories), people’s lives are complex and what a person sees About another person isn’t really the whole story.
There’s a lot more going on behind the scenes. I’m not always putting on a brave face, but I often do. And knowing that, I can be a bit more tactile with others. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think everyone does to a certain extent. It's not dishonest, we as humans naturally mould in to what society tells us we need to be. It's easier to say we are okay than burden someone with our problems. It's easier to act confident than admit we are a bag of nerves. We live in a loud and extroverted world, that's why a lot of people fake it until they make it  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Tears of a clown. Smokey Robbinson
https://youtu.be/ZaMX0Cs5Bc4
Thanks Woody. A classic and one of my favourite singers.
Your welcome. I think this says what a lot now know about people. (Celebritiy stories), people’s lives are complex and what a person sees About another person isn’t really the whole story.
There’s a lot more going on behind the scenes. I’m not always putting on a brave face, but I often do. And knowing that, I can be a bit more tactile with others. "
I think its been shown many times that people who become performers, actors, singers, etc are often extremely shy and introverted in private, and performing in public is almost an alter ego for them. |
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"Tears of a clown. Smokey Robbinson
https://youtu.be/ZaMX0Cs5Bc4
Thanks Woody. A classic and one of my favourite singers.
Your welcome. I think this says what a lot now know about people. (Celebritiy stories), people’s lives are complex and what a person sees About another person isn’t really the whole story.
There’s a lot more going on behind the scenes. I’m not always putting on a brave face, but I often do. And knowing that, I can be a bit more tactile with others.
I think its been shown many times that people who become performers, actors, singers, etc are often extremely shy and introverted in private, and performing in public is almost an alter ego for them."
This topic always makes me think of Robin Williams. Sometimes laughter covers up a lot of emotional turmoil. X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ever put on a happy face for others when you were feeling down ?
Every day of every year of my existence. Wow that was deep!"
Yep me too! It’s not all bad though.... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Thanks to everyone who has posted. I definitely helps me to see that other people do this, sometimes its easy to think everyone else is confident when you are less secure and that just isn't true.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yep, day in day out.
People always see me as the strong one, level headed and will turn to me in a crisis or look to me to to help so there is an element of not being able too.
Starting to learn that it is just as important to care for myself as well as others. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Tears of a clown. Smokey Robbinson
https://youtu.be/ZaMX0Cs5Bc4
Thanks Woody. A classic and one of my favourite singers.
Your welcome. I think this says what a lot now know about people. (Celebritiy stories), people’s lives are complex and what a person sees About another person isn’t really the whole story.
There’s a lot more going on behind the scenes. I’m not always putting on a brave face, but I often do. And knowing that, I can be a bit more tactile with others.
I think its been shown many times that people who become performers, actors, singers, etc are often extremely shy and introverted in private, and performing in public is almost an alter ego for them.
This topic always makes me think of Robin Williams. Sometimes laughter covers up a lot of emotional turmoil. X"
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I used to. Then I hit the floor and I realised that too much they’ve was wasted worrying what others would think. So now I am completely literal. If I’m not ok I will say so, whether the question was meant that way or not. Works for me.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Generally no, I tend to show exactly how I'm feeling ... rather good at saying it as well as I've never seen the point in hiding it as that must be exhausting.
On the flip side though, I'm lucky to be the annoyingly happy type most of the time so perhaps easier for me and if I'm not feeling it then happier on my own ... at work, I'm only too happy to say I don't know, I'll research that or ask someone who has more experience so never really have to blag it very often! Win win all round |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I used to. Then I hit the floor and I realised that too much they’ve was wasted worrying what others would think. So now I am completely literal. If I’m not ok I will say so, whether the question was meant that way or not. Works for me. "
That's good to hear. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ever put on a happy face for others when you were feeling down ?
Ever blagged your way into a job with a confident interview when you were really a bag of nerves ?
Is it dishonest to sometimes put on an act, or has it worked for you ?
"
Never put up a front if I feel shit i accept the way im feeling, if I'm putting on a front or mask so to speak im being dishonest with myself, and not truly honouring the way im feeling, which then make its not OK to feel the way im feeling when its ok to feel the way im feeling, and allow that to happen |
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
Isn’t this now a recommended distress tolerance tool for mental health. Yep.... done it my entire career, everything is always just beyond my capabilities and needing creativity and hard word to pull it off , I don’t think you can grow if you stay within your abilities |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Isn’t this now a recommended distress tolerance tool for mental health. Yep.... done it my entire career, everything is always just beyond my capabilities and needing creativity and hard word to pull it off , I don’t think you can grow if you stay within your abilities "
I didn't know that, sounds interesting. |
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I put on a front for work as I have people who rely on me and need me to be strong at all times, but I have coping mechanisms that help and I get to the beach to meditate whenever I need to release and refocus |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Don't we all? It's a normal coping mechanism when times are tough. As long as you have an outlet somewhere, either in private or with a trusted loved one, it's not an unhealthy way to operate. |
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