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~.~.~.LOVE.~.~.~

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

I often read posts on 'love'. Posts from those who have lost it. Posts advising those who've lost it on how to get it back. Posts making decisions of whether you were truly loved before you lost it ...... yada yada yada ....

What is love ?? What is it ? In anyone's opinion or experience. What is love ?

(i've already done the Howard Jones song .... so don't. Don't be doing Tina Turner either )

Just your ideas.....

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

What about Haddaway song

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By *acey_RedWoman  over a year ago

Liverpool

A chemical reaction in our brains designed to get us to form attachments to others in order to mate and raise offspring together.

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By *alandNitaCouple  over a year ago

Scunthorpe

Wanting to know what love is. You must be a foreigner!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I think love is best left undefined. But I agree with chemical explanations. Thats why when levels change we seem to lose the high of it.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"What about Haddaway song"

Damn .... I'll look that one up. Put it on the no list while im looking for it.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Wanting to know what love is. You must be a foreigner!"

*Granny licks the end of her pencil and puts their name on the list of offenders...... * .......

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"A chemical reaction in our brains designed to get us to form attachments to others in order to mate and raise offspring together. "

Ooooooooo that's for sure a good starter..... we all enjoy that feeling but then it dies.......

So what is Love with a capital L ? Love after the shag ?

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"I think love is best left undefined. But I agree with chemical explanations. Thats why when levels change we seem to lose the high of it. "

I'm quite happy to leave it undefined but if we leave it undefined then people would have to stop pretending to understand what the other is feeling or attempting to lay down the terms they will be loved under.

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By *rincess peachWoman  over a year ago

shits creek

Feeling like you're "home"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

If you were in a room with everyone you've ever met, who would you look for?

I saw this the other day and it made me think of three people. I think that's love.

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By *rincess peachWoman  over a year ago

shits creek


"Feeling like you're "home" "

That's how I can describe it for me anyway, in as few a words as possible.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"If you were in a room with everyone you've ever met, who would you look for?

I saw this the other day and it made me think of three people. I think that's love. "

Attachment? Familiarity ?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I think love is best left undefined. But I agree with chemical explanations. Thats why when levels change we seem to lose the high of it.

I'm quite happy to leave it undefined but if we leave it undefined then people would have to stop pretending to understand what the other is feeling or attempting to lay down the terms they will be loved under. "

So complex.

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

When you've got each other's back even when you don't like each other very much.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"When you've got each other's back even when you don't like each other very much."

There is this meme of an elderly couple sitting on a bench .. its raining and they both are turning away from each other but the man is still holding umbrella over her head. something like that ?

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By *olourpurpleMan  over a year ago

Waterford

Properly caring about someone from their ups and downs to how they are etc

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

It's a big question, I'm not sure my brain can cope with British Summer Time AND this!

It would help if we had more specific language to categorise the different types of love, and a lesson on distinguishing between them in year 6 of primary school alongside the puberty talk, complete with pop quiz, badges and a packet of haribo for the highest score.

Personally I think any feelings for a partner before around 2 years into a relationship when you've really got to know them are attraction, lust and infatuation. Before then we get a highly edited version of a person as they're on their best behaviour and keen on making a good impression.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"If you were in a room with everyone you've ever met, who would you look for?

I saw this the other day and it made me think of three people. I think that's love. "

Or many , many other reasons......

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By *inky_couple2020Couple  over a year ago

North West

It's what I feel for Mr KC all the time but also why I'm desperate to hug my adult son and why I want snuggles from my 4yo daughter. It's a thing (chemical reactions blah blah) designed to foster closeness, co-operation and altruistic behaviour between closely related humans, or between humans who have mutual attraction to each other. Mr KC is very attractive to me

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex


"When you've got each other's back even when you don't like each other very much.

There is this meme of an elderly couple sitting on a bench .. its raining and they both are turning away from each other but the man is still holding umbrella over her head. something like that ? "

Very much like that but it also applies to kids, friends, parents.

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By *UGGYBEAR2015Man  over a year ago

BRIDPORT

LOVE

Is patient

Is kind

Does not envy

Does not boast

Is not proud

Does not dishonour others

Is not self seeking

Is not easily angered

Keeps no record of wrongs

Does not delight in evil

Rejoices with the truth

Always protects

Always trusts

Always hopes

Always perseveres

Love never fails.

Corinthians 13. 4-8

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"When you've got each other's back even when you don't like each other very much."

Loyalty..... Army mentality ? Trained to do so ? Police officers ? Thieves ?

Do they 'love' each other?

I agree with what you say though , in that those who love each other are there through thick and thin but I don't see that AS love..... it's not what it is but it is apparent between those that love.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"When you've got each other's back even when you don't like each other very much.

There is this meme of an elderly couple sitting on a bench .. its raining and they both are turning away from each other but the man is still holding umbrella over her head. something like that ? "

Lovely toon ..... He's been taught to look after women ...... not love though is it. A stranger might do that for you ...... respect and all that.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"If you were in a room with everyone you've ever met, who would you look for?

I saw this the other day and it made me think of three people. I think that's love.

Or many , many other reasons......

"

Well I think everyone has a different idea of what love is to them so it could be different for you and others. And as Rose said, familiarity even could be what makes you look for them. But when I read that quote it really resonated with me about what love is.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Feeling like you're "home"

That's how I can describe it for me anyway, in as few a words as possible."

Safe..... Trust.....

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Properly caring about someone from their ups and downs to how they are etc"

Like a care worker or a nurse ?

Is caring the same thing as love ?

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By *gent CoulsonMan  over a year ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

Love is constantly thinking about that one person

Love is feeling like a part of you if missing when you are apart and whole when you are together.

Love is waking up next to the person you want to spend the rest of your life with.

Love is remembering the little things that make each other smile.

Love is an embrace, warm and safe

Love is respect, truth and honesty.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"It's a big question, I'm not sure my brain can cope with British Summer Time AND this!

It would help if we had more specific language to categorise the different types of love, and a lesson on distinguishing between them in year 6 of primary school alongside the puberty talk, complete with pop quiz, badges and a packet of haribo for the highest score.

Personally I think any feelings for a partner before around 2 years into a relationship when you've really got to know them are attraction, lust and infatuation. Before then we get a highly edited version of a person as they're on their best behaviour and keen on making a good impression. "

That really opens things up and I agree with most of it .....

We need precise language to discuss anything.

I don't hold that there are different types of love ..... Love is Love.

The degrees you intimate at would be , lust , desire, crush , sympathy , empathy etc etc .....

love is love isn't it ?

I don't want haribos.... I'll have crisps thannks..... I 'love' those.

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By *eliWoman  over a year ago

.


"....

It would help if we had more specific language to categorise the different types of love, and a lesson on distinguishing between them....

Personally I think any feelings for a partner before around 2 years into a relationship when you've really got to know them are attraction, lust and infatuation. Before then we get a highly edited version of a person as they're on their best behaviour and keen on making a good impression. "

Agreed on both points.

I feel love for friends but it's different to the love I feel for my partners in an almost inexplicable way. Love is far too nuanced, far too subjective and personalised a thing.

I remember this fantastic animated film on epistemology (I think!) and it had these thought bubbles depicting what love meant to each individual who said those immortal three words.

From personal experience I know people fall in "love" with the idea of me easily so I'm now framing "I love you as I lust after you and think you are fantastic." It's not I'm on my best behaviour though, my overthinking comes out at a drop of hat. It's more the image of me marries with the idea of a loveable person.

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By *eyond PurityCouple  over a year ago

Lincolnshire

When your soul feels full from you sitting in the same room together. When you do nothing, but it feels like it’s something, as you are together.

K

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"It's what I feel for Mr KC all the time but also why I'm desperate to hug my adult son and why I want snuggles from my 4yo daughter. It's a thing (chemical reactions blah blah) designed to foster closeness, co-operation and altruistic behaviour between closely related humans, or between humans who have mutual attraction to each other. Mr KC is very attractive to me "

Do you think we get beyond the chemical stage ? I see the chemical stage as a very early stage between adults......

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By *andyMinx_tvTV/TS  over a year ago

Leeds

Read "Love Factually: The Science of Who, How and Why We Love" by Laura Mucha. It's a truly absorbing read.

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By *inkyInkedBiWoman  over a year ago

.

Wanting to be with someone during the shit times as well as the good.

Someone who scoops you up and envelopes you with love.

Someone you want to grow old with

I had it and it was cruelly snatched away

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex


"When you've got each other's back even when you don't like each other very much.

Loyalty..... Army mentality ? Trained to do so ? Police officers ? Thieves ?

Do they 'love' each other?

I agree with what you say though , in that those who love each other are there through thick and thin but I don't see that AS love..... it's not what it is but it is apparent between those that love. "

Hmm, this is deep.

For me love is only evident in its expression.

Maybe it is just a chemical reaction at first but when I look at my parents in their 67th year of marriage, getting on each other's nerves, bickering, moaning about each other but terrified when one of them is ill I think it must be much more than that but what do I know

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"What about Haddaway song"

My sentiments also

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"LOVE

Is patient

Is kind

Does not envy

Does not boast

Is not proud

Does not dishonour others

Is not self seeking

Is not easily angered

Keeps no record of wrongs

Does not delight in evil

Rejoices with the truth

Always protects

Always trusts

Always hopes

Always perseveres

Love never fails.

Corinthians 13. 4-8"

Sounds lovely doesn't it. I don't turn to any bible for definitions of love though.

Who wrote Corinthians btw ?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It's a big question, I'm not sure my brain can cope with British Summer Time AND this!

It would help if we had more specific language to categorise the different types of love, and a lesson on distinguishing between them in year 6 of primary school alongside the puberty talk, complete with pop quiz, badges and a packet of haribo for the highest score.

Personally I think any feelings for a partner before around 2 years into a relationship when you've really got to know them are attraction, lust and infatuation. Before then we get a highly edited version of a person as they're on their best behaviour and keen on making a good impression.

That really opens things up and I agree with most of it .....

We need precise language to discuss anything.

I don't hold that there are different types of love ..... Love is Love.

The degrees you intimate at would be , lust , desire, crush , sympathy , empathy etc etc .....

love is love isn't it ?

I don't want haribos.... I'll have crisps thannks..... I 'love' those. "

What about the badge, do you still want that?

There's also conditional and unconditional love. What I feel for my children will never be destroyed, no matter what they do. I might not always like them or their behaviour, but the love is unshakeable. I've fallen out of love with friends and partners after being treated badly, or simply by growing apart.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple  over a year ago

North West


"LOVE

Is patient

Is kind

Does not envy

Does not boast

Is not proud

Does not dishonour others

Is not self seeking

Is not easily angered

Keeps no record of wrongs

Does not delight in evil

Rejoices with the truth

Always protects

Always trusts

Always hopes

Always perseveres

Love never fails.

Corinthians 13. 4-8

Sounds lovely doesn't it. I don't turn to any bible for definitions of love though.

Who wrote Corinthians btw ?"

St. Paul. The full title of the book is "St. Paul's letters to the Corinthians"

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By *rincess peachWoman  over a year ago

shits creek


"Feeling like you're "home"

That's how I can describe it for me anyway, in as few a words as possible.

Safe..... Trust..... "

Yes. I love my friends, and this is very much how I feel.

When I've been "in love" before, I've tended to find the safety and the trust are the things that get harmed. So, as much as I believe in supporting each other through the bad, it's also loving yourself enough not to ignore or discard red flags, and trusting yourself enough to make the decision to walk away or you end up losing so much more, you lose yourself, your hope and your faith.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"If you were in a room with everyone you've ever met, who would you look for?

I saw this the other day and it made me think of three people. I think that's love.

Or many , many other reasons......

Well I think everyone has a different idea of what love is to them so it could be different for you and others. And as Rose said, familiarity even could be what makes you look for them. But when I read that quote it really resonated with me about what love is. "

Now that I do agree with ..... 'We all have a different idea of what love it' ...... oh yes indeedy we do.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

is not it ......

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By *inky_couple2020Couple  over a year ago

North West


"It's what I feel for Mr KC all the time but also why I'm desperate to hug my adult son and why I want snuggles from my 4yo daughter. It's a thing (chemical reactions blah blah) designed to foster closeness, co-operation and altruistic behaviour between closely related humans, or between humans who have mutual attraction to each other. Mr KC is very attractive to me

Do you think we get beyond the chemical stage ? I see the chemical stage as a very early stage between adults......

"

Oxytocin is secreted in vast quantities after a mother gives birth and is what starts off the parental bond. Also happens with skin to skin contact between parent (any gender) and child. Chemical reactions are what causes all forms of love, romantic and platonic.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Love is constantly thinking about that one person

Love is feeling like a part of you if missing when you are apart and whole when you are together.

Love is waking up next to the person you want to spend the rest of your life with.

Love is remembering the little things that make each other smile.

Love is an embrace, warm and safe

Love is respect, truth and honesty. "

Thanks. Lovely sentiments.

Line one sounds more like anxiety to me I said TO ME .....

Nice sentiments tho .......

I love waking up in my own bed. I do still love others.... I promise

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It's a big question, I'm not sure my brain can cope with British Summer Time AND this!

It would help if we had more specific language to categorise the different types of love, and a lesson on distinguishing between them in year 6 of primary school alongside the puberty talk, complete with pop quiz, badges and a packet of haribo for the highest score.

Personally I think any feelings for a partner before around 2 years into a relationship when you've really got to know them are attraction, lust and infatuation. Before then we get a highly edited version of a person as they're on their best behaviour and keen on making a good impression. "

see the worst heart break i ever had was from my shortest relationship, but i know the feelings i had for that person were stronger than any love i ever felt for anyone before that i had been with for years and years

for me you might still be seeing an edited version of a person in that early phase but that just means perhaps your love won’t survive the changes , it doesn’t mean your feelings towards that version you know can’t be love

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By *ssex_tomMan  over a year ago

Chelmsford

It's as simple as this.

It's the chemical reaction in a females brain to form an attachment to a male in order to mate and give birth to help continue the population and often this is for life. Men have a similar reaction and have a series of crushes. A man's role As the bill is to form as many relationships as possible and father many children to continue the species. This is a tension between the set of morals programmed into us my the church and state. Nature is nature. Women love. Men have crushes and can more easily move on. Some will disagree but that's my view...

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"When your soul feels full from you sitting in the same room together. When you do nothing, but it feels like it’s something, as you are together.

K"

I can do that with someone I like or respect......

I don't think all of us believe in souls.....

Thanks for sharing your ideas on love ..... i am interested. Seriously.

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By *UGGYBEAR2015Man  over a year ago

BRIDPORT


"LOVE

Is patient

Is kind

Does not envy

Does not boast

Is not proud

Does not dishonour others

Is not self seeking

Is not easily angered

Keeps no record of wrongs

Does not delight in evil

Rejoices with the truth

Always protects

Always trusts

Always hopes

Always perseveres

Love never fails.

Corinthians 13. 4-8

Sounds lovely doesn't it. I don't turn to any bible for definitions of love though.

Who wrote Corinthians btw ?"

No idea, I’m not religious. It was at the bottom of a letter someone sent me at Christmas and it was still in my phone, when I saw your thread it reminded me of it and I copied it out.

Went too all that trouble and you dismissed it without a care, not much love there Granny

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It's a big question, I'm not sure my brain can cope with British Summer Time AND this!

It would help if we had more specific language to categorise the different types of love, and a lesson on distinguishing between them in year 6 of primary school alongside the puberty talk, complete with pop quiz, badges and a packet of haribo for the highest score.

Personally I think any feelings for a partner before around 2 years into a relationship when you've really got to know them are attraction, lust and infatuation. Before then we get a highly edited version of a person as they're on their best behaviour and keen on making a good impression.

see the worst heart break i ever had was from my shortest relationship, but i know the feelings i had for that person were stronger than any love i ever felt for anyone before that i had been with for years and years

for me you might still be seeing an edited version of a person in that early phase but that just means perhaps your love won’t survive the changes , it doesn’t mean your feelings towards that version you know can’t be love "

I'm not saying those feelings are any less powerful, quite the opposite in fact. But to really love the bones of someone you need to know who they are.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Read "Love Factually: The Science of Who, How and Why We Love" by Laura Mucha. It's a truly absorbing read. "

I might if I ever feel the need. Thanks for the suggestion though ......

She's an ex lawyer.. She did research and interview so i'm not saying her work is without meaning ..... it's not exactly her field though....

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Does asking Joe Public tell us what love is ?

I'm asking fourmites..... maybe Laura Mucha pipped me to the post

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"When your soul feels full from you sitting in the same room together. When you do nothing, but it feels like it’s something, as you are together.

K

I can do that with someone I like or respect......

I don't think all of us believe in souls.....

Thanks for sharing your ideas on love ..... i am interested. Seriously."

the way i see these examples people have given is just because you could do them for reasons other than love , doesn’t mean that they can’t also be elements of love

fo example the sky is blue, but not everything blue is the sky

things people have listed, care, safety, trust, etc etc

love can be these actions and feelings, but not all of these actions and feelings are love

does that come across as gibberish? it makes sense in my head

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Wanting to be with someone during the shit times as well as the good.

Someone who scoops you up and envelopes you with love.

Someone you want to grow old with

I had it and it was cruelly snatched away "

x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

What love means changes with age.

But all you need is love.

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By *adame BWoman  over a year ago

C'est moi Boudoir

For me I think this poem by Lang Leav pretty much sums it up!

What was it like to love him? Asked Gratitude.

It was like being exhumed, I answered, and brought to life in a flash of brilliance.

What was it like to be loved in return? Asked Joy.

It was like being seen after a perpetual darkness, I replied. To be heard after a lifetime of silence.

What was it like to lose him? Asked Sorrow. There was a long pause before I responded:

It was like hearing every goodbye ever said to me—said all at once.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I don't know what it is.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"When you've got each other's back even when you don't like each other very much.

Loyalty..... Army mentality ? Trained to do so ? Police officers ? Thieves ?

Do they 'love' each other?

I agree with what you say though , in that those who love each other are there through thick and thin but I don't see that AS love..... it's not what it is but it is apparent between those that love.

Hmm, this is deep.

For me love is only evident in its expression.

Maybe it is just a chemical reaction at first but when I look at my parents in their 67th year of marriage, getting on each other's nerves, bickering, moaning about each other but terrified when one of them is ill I think it must be much more than that but what do I know "

More than you think ........

Love is indeed evident in expression .....

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"A chemical reaction in our brains designed to get us to form attachments to others in order to mate and raise offspring together. "

This.x

Then a comfy pair of Jean that you Chuck on daily as it’s safe, reliable and comfy....

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By *inky_couple2020Couple  over a year ago

North West


"It's as simple as this.

It's the chemical reaction in a females brain to form an attachment to a male in order to mate and give birth to help continue the population and often this is for life. Men have a similar reaction and have a series of crushes. A man's role As the bill is to form as many relationships as possible and father many children to continue the species. This is a tension between the set of morals programmed into us my the church and state. Nature is nature. Women love. Men have crushes and can more easily move on. Some will disagree but that's my view..."

Do you have references to back that up,Tom?

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"What about Haddaway song

My sentiments also "

I still haven't listened. Maybe I should and then we could just drop the mic I w ill though ...... I will listen.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"It's a big question, I'm not sure my brain can cope with British Summer Time AND this!

It would help if we had more specific language to categorise the different types of love, and a lesson on distinguishing between them in year 6 of primary school alongside the puberty talk, complete with pop quiz, badges and a packet of haribo for the highest score.

Personally I think any feelings for a partner before around 2 years into a relationship when you've really got to know them are attraction, lust and infatuation. Before then we get a highly edited version of a person as they're on their best behaviour and keen on making a good impression.

That really opens things up and I agree with most of it .....

We need precise language to discuss anything.

I don't hold that there are different types of love ..... Love is Love.

The degrees you intimate at would be , lust , desire, crush , sympathy , empathy etc etc .....

love is love isn't it ?

I don't want haribos.... I'll have crisps thannks..... I 'love' those.

What about the badge, do you still want that?

There's also conditional and unconditional love. What I feel for my children will never be destroyed, no matter what they do. I might not always like them or their behaviour, but the love is unshakeable. I've fallen out of love with friends and partners after being treated badly, or simply by growing apart. "

(heart thingy) I don't like the behaviour of one of my daughters very much at the moment but i'll kill anyone that says a word about her.... boof ! straight up their wind pipe.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It's a big question, I'm not sure my brain can cope with British Summer Time AND this!

It would help if we had more specific language to categorise the different types of love, and a lesson on distinguishing between them in year 6 of primary school alongside the puberty talk, complete with pop quiz, badges and a packet of haribo for the highest score.

Personally I think any feelings for a partner before around 2 years into a relationship when you've really got to know them are attraction, lust and infatuation. Before then we get a highly edited version of a person as they're on their best behaviour and keen on making a good impression.

see the worst heart break i ever had was from my shortest relationship, but i know the feelings i had for that person were stronger than any love i ever felt for anyone before that i had been with for years and years

for me you might still be seeing an edited version of a person in that early phase but that just means perhaps your love won’t survive the changes , it doesn’t mean your feelings towards that version you know can’t be love

I'm not saying those feelings are any less powerful, quite the opposite in fact. But to really love the bones of someone you need to know who they are."

you might never know someone fully, so that would mean you could never love someone

for example a woman (or man) finds out their partner has been living a double life for 10 years, your concept would mean you were never able to have loved them , but you did , its just that you loved the version you knew

i could see how it could work in reverse though , to love someone you have feel able to share all of yourself with them - safe to give all of yourself over, and in this example the one with the double life and parts of themselves concealed cannot truly be in love

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

If the badge is a fuck off big shiny one that gets me attention ....... yeah .... I want the badge !!!!

Nothing modest thanks.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"LOVE

Is patient

Is kind

Does not envy

Does not boast

Is not proud

Does not dishonour others

Is not self seeking

Is not easily angered

Keeps no record of wrongs

Does not delight in evil

Rejoices with the truth

Always protects

Always trusts

Always hopes

Always perseveres

Love never fails.

Corinthians 13. 4-8

Sounds lovely doesn't it. I don't turn to any bible for definitions of love though.

Who wrote Corinthians btw ?

St. Paul. The full title of the book is "St. Paul's letters to the Corinthians""

Did he type it up ?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It's a big question, I'm not sure my brain can cope with British Summer Time AND this!

It would help if we had more specific language to categorise the different types of love, and a lesson on distinguishing between them in year 6 of primary school alongside the puberty talk, complete with pop quiz, badges and a packet of haribo for the highest score.

Personally I think any feelings for a partner before around 2 years into a relationship when you've really got to know them are attraction, lust and infatuation. Before then we get a highly edited version of a person as they're on their best behaviour and keen on making a good impression.

see the worst heart break i ever had was from my shortest relationship, but i know the feelings i had for that person were stronger than any love i ever felt for anyone before that i had been with for years and years

for me you might still be seeing an edited version of a person in that early phase but that just means perhaps your love won’t survive the changes , it doesn’t mean your feelings towards that version you know can’t be love

I'm not saying those feelings are any less powerful, quite the opposite in fact. But to really love the bones of someone you need to know who they are.

you might never know someone fully, so that would mean you could never love someone

for example a woman (or man) finds out their partner has been living a double life for 10 years, your concept would mean you were never able to have loved them , but you did , its just that you loved the version you knew

i could see how it could work in reverse though , to love someone you have feel able to share all of yourself with them - safe to give all of yourself over, and in this example the one with the double life and parts of themselves concealed cannot truly be in love "

Yes I think you're right. Loving a version of someone can be just as powerful and all-consuming as loving a whole person.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Feeling like you're "home"

That's how I can describe it for me anyway, in as few a words as possible.

Safe..... Trust.....

Yes. I love my friends, and this is very much how I feel.

When I've been "in love" before, I've tended to find the safety and the trust are the things that get harmed. So, as much as I believe in supporting each other through the bad, it's also loving yourself enough not to ignore or discard red flags, and trusting yourself enough to make the decision to walk away or you end up losing so much more, you lose yourself, your hope and your faith.

"

BOOM....... love of self. No one has mentioned that ........ oh yes indeedy we are getting further with this ......

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

from the chemical point of view , does anyone know why your brain stops making these chemicals , because i presume this must happen since people are able to fall out of love with each other

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"It's what I feel for Mr KC all the time but also why I'm desperate to hug my adult son and why I want snuggles from my 4yo daughter. It's a thing (chemical reactions blah blah) designed to foster closeness, co-operation and altruistic behaviour between closely related humans, or between humans who have mutual attraction to each other. Mr KC is very attractive to me

Do you think we get beyond the chemical stage ? I see the chemical stage as a very early stage between adults......

Oxytocin is secreted in vast quantities after a mother gives birth and is what starts off the parental bond. Also happens with skin to skin contact between parent (any gender) and child. Chemical reactions are what causes all forms of love, romantic and platonic."

I'd argue that Romance and Love are very much NOT related. I can romance anyone without loving them ...... I do believe in the existence of platonic love and SMH when those who profess to 'not be getting any' confuse sex and love.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It's a big question, I'm not sure my brain can cope with British Summer Time AND this!

It would help if we had more specific language to categorise the different types of love, and a lesson on distinguishing between them in year 6 of primary school alongside the puberty talk, complete with pop quiz, badges and a packet of haribo for the highest score.

Personally I think any feelings for a partner before around 2 years into a relationship when you've really got to know them are attraction, lust and infatuation. Before then we get a highly edited version of a person as they're on their best behaviour and keen on making a good impression.

see the worst heart break i ever had was from my shortest relationship, but i know the feelings i had for that person were stronger than any love i ever felt for anyone before that i had been with for years and years

for me you might still be seeing an edited version of a person in that early phase but that just means perhaps your love won’t survive the changes , it doesn’t mean your feelings towards that version you know can’t be love

I'm not saying those feelings are any less powerful, quite the opposite in fact. But to really love the bones of someone you need to know who they are.

you might never know someone fully, so that would mean you could never love someone

for example a woman (or man) finds out their partner has been living a double life for 10 years, your concept would mean you were never able to have loved them , but you did , its just that you loved the version you knew

i could see how it could work in reverse though , to love someone you have feel able to share all of yourself with them - safe to give all of yourself over, and in this example the one with the double life and parts of themselves concealed cannot truly be in love

Yes I think you're right. Loving a version of someone can be just as powerful and all-consuming as loving a whole person. "

i do get though that its easier to keep up edited versions of yourself in the short term so by a few years in the chances are much higher that your love is for the real version of someone

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It's as simple as this.

It's the chemical reaction in a females brain to form an attachment to a male in order to mate and give birth to help continue the population and often this is for life. Men have a similar reaction and have a series of crushes. A man's role As the bill is to form as many relationships as possible and father many children to continue the species. This is a tension between the set of morals programmed into us my the church and state. Nature is nature. Women love. Men have crushes and can more easily move on. Some will disagree but that's my view..."

Tbh I think you're right

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"It's a big question, I'm not sure my brain can cope with British Summer Time AND this!

It would help if we had more specific language to categorise the different types of love, and a lesson on distinguishing between them in year 6 of primary school alongside the puberty talk, complete with pop quiz, badges and a packet of haribo for the highest score.

Personally I think any feelings for a partner before around 2 years into a relationship when you've really got to know them are attraction, lust and infatuation. Before then we get a highly edited version of a person as they're on their best behaviour and keen on making a good impression.

see the worst heart break i ever had was from my shortest relationship, but i know the feelings i had for that person were stronger than any love i ever felt for anyone before that i had been with for years and years

for me you might still be seeing an edited version of a person in that early phase but that just means perhaps your love won’t survive the changes , it doesn’t mean your feelings towards that version you know can’t be love "

Agreed wholeheartedly. Who is to say that love cannot be almost instant?

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"It's as simple as this.

It's the chemical reaction in a females brain to form an attachment to a male in order to mate and give birth to help continue the population and often this is for life. Men have a similar reaction and have a series of crushes. A man's role As the bill is to form as many relationships as possible and father many children to continue the species. This is a tension between the set of morals programmed into us my the church and state. Nature is nature. Women love. Men have crushes and can more easily move on. Some will disagree but that's my view..."

I disagree with very little of what you say Tom. Except that you confuse pro-creation with love.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I don’t know, I don’t wanna know, I just like it.

Love is a feeling that has accompanied me for as long as I can remember and long may it continue.

Love is what makes me who I am.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"from the chemical point of view , does anyone know why your brain stops making these chemicals , because i presume this must happen since people are able to fall out of love with each other

"

If I remember rightly it lasts around 2/3 years long enough for baby to reach toddler age...all to do with survival.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"LOVE

Is patient

Is kind

Does not envy

Does not boast

Is not proud

Does not dishonour others

Is not self seeking

Is not easily angered

Keeps no record of wrongs

Does not delight in evil

Rejoices with the truth

Always protects

Always trusts

Always hopes

Always perseveres

Love never fails.

Corinthians 13. 4-8

Sounds lovely doesn't it. I don't turn to any bible for definitions of love though.

Who wrote Corinthians btw ?

No idea, I’m not religious. It was at the bottom of a letter someone sent me at Christmas and it was still in my phone, when I saw your thread it reminded me of it and I copied it out.

Went too all that trouble and you dismissed it without a care, not much love there Granny "

Ahhhhhhh Glasshoppaaaaaaaa I love. I appreciate your fanzine article It doesn't explain what love is tho......

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Love is a Battlefield

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I don’t know, I don’t wanna know, I just like it.

Love is a feeling that has accompanied me for as long as I can remember and long may it continue.

Love is what makes me who I am.

"

I don't like it. For me, Love means pain and always ends in tears

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By *rewersprojectMan  over a year ago

Leeds

[Removed by poster at 28/03/21 13:54:51]

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"When your soul feels full from you sitting in the same room together. When you do nothing, but it feels like it’s something, as you are together.

K

I can do that with someone I like or respect......

I don't think all of us believe in souls.....

Thanks for sharing your ideas on love ..... i am interested. Seriously.

the way i see these examples people have given is just because you could do them for reasons other than love , doesn’t mean that they can’t also be elements of love

fo example the sky is blue, but not everything blue is the sky

things people have listed, care, safety, trust, etc etc

love can be these actions and feelings, but not all of these actions and feelings are love

does that come across as gibberish? it makes sense in my head "

Not gibberish at all. They can indeed be elements of love. I wouldn't dispute that. But each of all the ( perfectly acceptable actions/descriptions ) above do not define love ....... I had eggs for breakfast but eggs are not breakfast......

I agree with most people but we still don't know what love is.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I don’t know, I don’t wanna know, I just like it.

Love is a feeling that has accompanied me for as long as I can remember and long may it continue.

Love is what makes me who I am.

I don't like it. For me, Love means pain and always ends in tears "

That’s sad.

I do understand that love experiences are different for everyone.

It’s a strange thing.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"What love means changes with age.

But all you need is love."

True..

Did YOU sneak a song in there ???

OUT !

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"For me I think this poem by Lang Leav pretty much sums it up!

What was it like to love him? Asked Gratitude.

It was like being exhumed, I answered, and brought to life in a flash of brilliance.

What was it like to be loved in return? Asked Joy.

It was like being seen after a perpetual darkness, I replied. To be heard after a lifetime of silence.

What was it like to lose him? Asked Sorrow. There was a long pause before I responded:

It was like hearing every goodbye ever said to me—said all at once."

Utterly, Utterly , Utterly beautiful. I am going to get a copy of that ..... However it assumes love.... It describes the feeling of someone who has loved and lost ... rather than tell us what love is.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"I don't know what it is.

"

Biggest truth here today Patrick

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"When your soul feels full from you sitting in the same room together. When you do nothing, but it feels like it’s something, as you are together.

K

I can do that with someone I like or respect......

I don't think all of us believe in souls.....

Thanks for sharing your ideas on love ..... i am interested. Seriously.

the way i see these examples people have given is just because you could do them for reasons other than love , doesn’t mean that they can’t also be elements of love

fo example the sky is blue, but not everything blue is the sky

things people have listed, care, safety, trust, etc etc

love can be these actions and feelings, but not all of these actions and feelings are love

does that come across as gibberish? it makes sense in my head

Not gibberish at all. They can indeed be elements of love. I wouldn't dispute that. But each of all the ( perfectly acceptable actions/descriptions ) above do not define love ....... I had eggs for breakfast but eggs are not breakfast......

I agree with most people but we still don't know what love is. "

so maybe its a culmination of these things before it is love - one their own they do not equal love but together they do?

like eggs alone don’t make a breakfast but if you have eggs, sausages, bacon together you got yourself a breakfast , and yet also someone on the continent might have an entirely different and yet equally as valid view of what makes up their breakfast (take this with a pinch of salt because that cheese and meats nonsense for breakfast is sacrilege )

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"from the chemical point of view , does anyone know why your brain stops making these chemicals , because i presume this must happen since people are able to fall out of love with each other

"

That's cos the initial 'rush' is not love....... it's attraction .....

Some might argue that that is all love is...

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"I don’t know, I don’t wanna know, I just like it.

Love is a feeling that has accompanied me for as long as I can remember and long may it continue.

Love is what makes me who I am.

"

You are loved ?

OR

You love ?

OR

Both ?

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By *inky_couple2020Couple  over a year ago

North West


"from the chemical point of view , does anyone know why your brain stops making these chemicals , because i presume this must happen since people are able to fall out of love with each other

If I remember rightly it lasts around 2/3 years long enough for baby to reach toddler age...all to do with survival. "

Also lasts as long as you breastfeed so could be longer than 3yrs.... By then, the connection is imprinted and you love your child, usually unconditionally for the rest of your/their lives.

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By *atnip make me purrWoman  over a year ago

Reading

Unconditional love is reserved only for my children. This is the only love i really understand as i don't believe ive been in love with a man -lust, infatuation yes but not the all consuming love i have felt for and from my children from the moment they were born.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"I don’t know, I don’t wanna know, I just like it.

Love is a feeling that has accompanied me for as long as I can remember and long may it continue.

Love is what makes me who I am.

I don't like it. For me, Love means pain and always ends in tears "

Attachment perhaps ?

Surely love is kind....

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By *inky_couple2020Couple  over a year ago

North West


"It's what I feel for Mr KC all the time but also why I'm desperate to hug my adult son and why I want snuggles from my 4yo daughter. It's a thing (chemical reactions blah blah) designed to foster closeness, co-operation and altruistic behaviour between closely related humans, or between humans who have mutual attraction to each other. Mr KC is very attractive to me

Do you think we get beyond the chemical stage ? I see the chemical stage as a very early stage between adults......

Oxytocin is secreted in vast quantities after a mother gives birth and is what starts off the parental bond. Also happens with skin to skin contact between parent (any gender) and child. Chemical reactions are what causes all forms of love, romantic and platonic.

I'd argue that Romance and Love are very much NOT related. I can romance anyone without loving them ...... I do believe in the existence of platonic love and SMH when those who profess to 'not be getting any' confuse sex and love. "

Romance is a series of cultural norms for "showing off" or peacocking to gain love and affection. Different cultures have very different ideas to what romance involves but there's no difference in the chemical reactions in the brain when two people are attracted or a woman gives birth, that is a physiological phenomenon.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"from the chemical point of view , does anyone know why your brain stops making these chemicals , because i presume this must happen since people are able to fall out of love with each other

That's cos the initial 'rush' is not love....... it's attraction .....

Some might argue that that is all love is...

"

its not really attraction when its with your kids / parents though is it , but i guess its also much harder to fall out of that kind of love , wonder if its different chemicals or different concentrations of the same chemicals depending if its romantic love or familial love - there must be a reason our brain knows to categorise them differently

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By *inky_couple2020Couple  over a year ago

North West


"LOVE

Is patient

Is kind

Does not envy

Does not boast

Is not proud

Does not dishonour others

Is not self seeking

Is not easily angered

Keeps no record of wrongs

Does not delight in evil

Rejoices with the truth

Always protects

Always trusts

Always hopes

Always perseveres

Love never fails.

Corinthians 13. 4-8

Sounds lovely doesn't it. I don't turn to any bible for definitions of love though.

Who wrote Corinthians btw ?

St. Paul. The full title of the book is "St. Paul's letters to the Corinthians"

Did he type it up ? "

Yes, on a Remington analogue typewriter

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It's what I feel for Mr KC all the time but also why I'm desperate to hug my adult son and why I want snuggles from my 4yo daughter. It's a thing (chemical reactions blah blah) designed to foster closeness, co-operation and altruistic behaviour between closely related humans, or between humans who have mutual attraction to each other. Mr KC is very attractive to me

Do you think we get beyond the chemical stage ? I see the chemical stage as a very early stage between adults......

Oxytocin is secreted in vast quantities after a mother gives birth and is what starts off the parental bond. Also happens with skin to skin contact between parent (any gender) and child. Chemical reactions are what causes all forms of love, romantic and platonic.

I'd argue that Romance and Love are very much NOT related. I can romance anyone without loving them ...... I do believe in the existence of platonic love and SMH when those who profess to 'not be getting any' confuse sex and love.

Romance is a series of cultural norms for "showing off" or peacocking to gain love and affection. Different cultures have very different ideas to what romance involves but there's no difference in the chemical reactions in the brain when two people are attracted or a woman gives birth, that is a physiological phenomenon."

oh my post was just too slow in asking this question about the chemicals

is there a reason then that our brain knows the difference between attracted love and maternal love - or is that just purely from expected behaviours from culture?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I don’t know, I don’t wanna know, I just like it.

Love is a feeling that has accompanied me for as long as I can remember and long may it continue.

Love is what makes me who I am.

You are loved ?

OR

You love ?

OR

Both ?"

Both.

Totally, loved and give love.

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By *UGGYBEAR2015Man  over a year ago

BRIDPORT

Why does it have to be defined?

Why can’t it be whatever an individual wants it to be at any given time, which will change endlessly to suit their own narrative?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Why does it have to be defined?

Why can’t it be whatever an individual wants it to be at any given time, which will change endlessly to suit their own narrative?"

i guess in a relationship be that family or romantic it helps to at least have a common understanding between both parties as to what love between you means , surely helps to maintain it , but it could be different in every relationships sure

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Why does it have to be defined?

Why can’t it be whatever an individual wants it to be at any given time, which will change endlessly to suit their own narrative?"

Then it has no value between people Huggy.

It doesn't exist outside of the self.

And I am not disagreeing.

It's a view I hold.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"I don’t know, I don’t wanna know, I just like it.

Love is a feeling that has accompanied me for as long as I can remember and long may it continue.

Love is what makes me who I am.

You are loved ?

OR

You love ?

OR

Both ?

Both.

Totally, loved and give love.

"

I got a butterflutter then ..... nice way to be in the world.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

I've finally looked up Haddaway .......

No.

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By *iaisonseekerMan  over a year ago

Liverpool

Schopenhauer offers some interesting if borderline misogynistic views on the subject:

"The only true purpose, the real purpose of every communion in love is the procreation, the birth of a child, although people who are in love are unable to conceive the nature's treacherous way, casting over the actual act a shining veil ".

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By *adame BWoman  over a year ago

C'est moi Boudoir


"For me I think this poem by Lang Leav pretty much sums it up!

What was it like to love him? Asked Gratitude.

It was like being exhumed, I answered, and brought to life in a flash of brilliance.

What was it like to be loved in return? Asked Joy.

It was like being seen after a perpetual darkness, I replied. To be heard after a lifetime of silence.

What was it like to lose him? Asked Sorrow. There was a long pause before I responded:

It was like hearing every goodbye ever said to me—said all at once.

Utterly, Utterly , Utterly beautiful. I am going to get a copy of that ..... However it assumes love.... It describes the feeling of someone who has loved and lost ... rather than tell us what love is. "

I adore this poem.

I think she does in the first verse and as a result you have the impact of the last verse.

I believe in connecting with people on different levels. I think that you just feel it. That's what makes it so hard to define. Loads of things already mentioned like trust, loyalty, honesty etc...they are ingredients. I think because we are all so individual that everyone will experience it differently.

I heard a great saying once which is kind of like the poem above.

Love can only be measured in heartbreak. I think that is so sad. The very thing that differentiates us and we all question, seek, go against our better judgement for at times, try to define etc...will only fully be felt after it is gone.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I don’t know, I don’t wanna know, I just like it.

Love is a feeling that has accompanied me for as long as I can remember and long may it continue.

Love is what makes me who I am.

"

I love this so much.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

The Greeks have six words for Love: Eros, Philia, Ludus, Agape, Pragma and Philautia. I think just one word is not enough for the different and changing types of Love we feel - and it probably means different things depending on our experiences.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

I think that the various words are needed. Language carries meaning and yet we have not yet defined love as such.

I do not hold that one word is sufficient to describe how we feel about various people and objects in our lives.....

e.g. When people say - I LOVE this programme....... I LOVE bacon ....... I LOVE these shoes........ I LOVE my facebook 'friends' .......

To me this cheapens 'love'.

When someone squeals at a new friend.... 'O.M.G! I love you' ....... when they just mean ..... well we had great fun today. You are so funny to be with ........

It's very misleading ....... especially to someone who was looking for love.

It's used far too much and too easily nowadays..

My generation used it sparingly, it meant something. You couldn't say it about an ice-cream you'd have looked a twat........

P.S. I love vanilla if anyone is buying.

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By *adame BWoman  over a year ago

C'est moi Boudoir


"I think that the various words are needed. Language carries meaning and yet we have not yet defined love as such.

I do not hold that one word is sufficient to describe how we feel about various people and objects in our lives.....

e.g. When people say - I LOVE this programme....... I LOVE bacon ....... I LOVE these shoes........ I LOVE my facebook 'friends' .......

To me this cheapens 'love'.

When someone squeals at a new friend.... 'O.M.G! I love you' ....... when they just mean ..... well we had great fun today. You are so funny to be with ........

It's very misleading ....... especially to someone who was looking for love.

It's used far too much and too easily nowadays..

My generation used it sparingly, it meant something. You couldn't say it about an ice-cream you'd have looked a twat........

P.S. I love vanilla if anyone is buying. "

Materialism has taken over. Instantaneous satisfaction and replacement seem more prevalent today which devalues everything and we call it evolution

I really like that this pandemic has highlighted our behaviour to a degree and made us more appreciative of what is termed the simple things but in truth, they are the most important.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I don’t know, I don’t wanna know, I just like it.

Love is a feeling that has accompanied me for as long as I can remember and long may it continue.

Love is what makes me who I am.

I love this so much. "

Me too. Beautiful

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By *eoeclipseWoman  over a year ago

glasgow


"It's a big question, I'm not sure my brain can cope with British Summer Time AND this!

It would help if we had more specific language to categorise the different types of love, and a lesson on distinguishing between them in year 6 of primary school alongside the puberty talk, complete with pop quiz, badges and a packet of haribo for the highest score.

Personally I think any feelings for a partner before around 2 years into a relationship when you've really got to know them are attraction, lust and infatuation. Before then we get a highly edited version of a person as they're on their best behaviour and keen on making a good impression. "

hence why none of mine last that long, spotted before 2 years

I agree with you that there are different types of love, your love for your kids for instance is not the same as for your partner. regardless of the type of love it is as peach say feeling like home, no matter where you actually are, its definitely a personal feeling.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Schopenhauer offers some interesting if borderline misogynistic views on the subject:

"The only true purpose, the real purpose of every communion in love is the procreation, the birth of a child, although people who are in love are unable to conceive the nature's treacherous way, casting over the actual act a shining veil "."

what about the people who are not maternal and never intend to pro create, is it a case of my biology doesn’t compute that decision in my consciousness so still charges on with the hormonal and chemical steps anyway?

or possibly its why i have never been able to make love last

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"For me I think this poem by Lang Leav pretty much sums it up!

What was it like to love him? Asked Gratitude.

It was like being exhumed, I answered, and brought to life in a flash of brilliance.

What was it like to be loved in return? Asked Joy.

It was like being seen after a perpetual darkness, I replied. To be heard after a lifetime of silence.

What was it like to lose him? Asked Sorrow. There was a long pause before I responded:

It was like hearing every goodbye ever said to me—said all at once.

Utterly, Utterly , Utterly beautiful. I am going to get a copy of that ..... However it assumes love.... It describes the feeling of someone who has loved and lost ... rather than tell us what love is.

I adore this poem.

I think she does in the first verse and as a result you have the impact of the last verse.

I believe in connecting with people on different levels. I think that you just feel it. That's what makes it so hard to define. Loads of things already mentioned like trust, loyalty, honesty etc...they are ingredients. I think because we are all so individual that everyone will experience it differently.

I heard a great saying once which is kind of like the poem above.

Love can only be measured in heartbreak. I think that is so sad. The very thing that differentiates us and we all question, seek, go against our better judgement for at times, try to define etc...will only fully be felt after it is gone. "

i can relate to this , i think i’ve only ever appreciated the full measure of my feelings in retrospect when it was time to pack them back in a box and move on

but i live in hope that its a case of “so far” its only been measured that way , and that one day i will be in such strong love that i can appreciate it fully during it

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By *inky_couple2020Couple  over a year ago

North West


"Schopenhauer offers some interesting if borderline misogynistic views on the subject:

"The only true purpose, the real purpose of every communion in love is the procreation, the birth of a child, although people who are in love are unable to conceive the nature's treacherous way, casting over the actual act a shining veil ".

what about the people who are not maternal and never intend to pro create, is it a case of my biology doesn’t compute that decision in my consciousness so still charges on with the hormonal and chemical steps anyway?

or possibly its why i have never been able to make love last "

It's possible, yes, that the non-maternal brain is wired differently. We're all very different at the end of the day.

As for the earlier question about romantic love vs platonic love and the chemicals that underpin it - there's no difference. Oxytocin is the culprit and it's released in mothers during/after birth and for a period after but it's also released during romantic liaisons and especially skin to skin contact. Which is why naked snuggles are ace!

Try this article in Scientific American with the title "Be Mine Forever: Oxytocin May Help Build Long-Lasting Love"

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By *ettaManMan  over a year ago

Kerry and Dublin

Eastern philosophies such as Buddhism and Hinduism point to the idea that the fundamental nature of our being is love/loving, it's just the conditioning we encounter as we go through life that obscures this.

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By *inkyInkedBiWoman  over a year ago

.


"For me I think this poem by Lang Leav pretty much sums it up!

What was it like to love him? Asked Gratitude.

It was like being exhumed, I answered, and brought to life in a flash of brilliance.

What was it like to be loved in return? Asked Joy.

It was like being seen after a perpetual darkness, I replied. To be heard after a lifetime of silence.

What was it like to lose him? Asked Sorrow. There was a long pause before I responded:

It was like hearing every goodbye ever said to me—said all at once."

This resonated with me so much after I lost my husband

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By *assing Fancies xCouple  over a year ago

Sherwood Forest

The smell that waffs out when the door for KFC swings open

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By *hubaysiWoman  over a year ago

Leeds


"I often read posts on 'love'. Posts from those who have lost it. Posts advising those who've lost it on how to get it back. Posts making decisions of whether you were truly loved before you lost it ...... yada yada yada ....

What is love ?? What is it ? In anyone's opinion or experience. What is love ?

(i've already done the Howard Jones song .... so don't. Don't be doing Tina Turner either )

Just your ideas....."

Granny

I haven’t a clue what love is.

I’m stumped.

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By *oudLoutishLoverWoman  over a year ago

Colchester

Nice sex. Then boredom. Then annoyance. Then wanting to murder them with your cornflakes spoon. Then acceptance. Then the realisation that you can't imagine your life without this bloody person.

Real love isn’t the honeymoon period. It comes after a long time of thick and thin, better and worse, richer and poorer.

'The Book of Love is long and boring'.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

A strong bond and emotional connection between two people

Isn't it that simple?

If what you mean is to decipher what emotions are, it's all electrical impulses that we are yet to fully understand.

All I know is that I loved being in love and it made me happy to feel that way. Maybe one day my electrical impulses will start to dance around my head again.

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By *iaisonseekerMan  over a year ago

Liverpool


"Schopenhauer offers some interesting if borderline misogynistic views on the subject:

"The only true purpose, the real purpose of every communion in love is the procreation, the birth of a child, although people who are in love are unable to conceive the nature's treacherous way, casting over the actual act a shining veil ".

what about the people who are not maternal and never intend to pro create, is it a case of my biology doesn’t compute that decision in my consciousness so still charges on with the hormonal and chemical steps anyway?

or possibly its why i have never been able to make love last "

I guess the rational mind can override biological impulses but not extinguish them. I don't wholly subscribe to the Dawkins view that we are all perpetually in thrall to the programming of our genes.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I don't know what it is.

Biggest truth here today Patrick "

Seems confusing and does more damage than good.

But wouldn't know

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By *ex HolesMan  over a year ago

Up North

Love is getting a blow job without having to finish off the back bedroom skirting boards cause ‘they’ve not been painted for a while’

Love is having anal on none ‘birthdays’

Love is giving you that little handjob and not saving it for ‘taking the bins out when it’s raining’

Love is having a fuck once a week and not because you bought her that top she wanted from Tammy Girl

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Love is getting a blow job without having to finish off the back bedroom skirting boards cause ‘they’ve not been painted for a while’

Love is having anal on none ‘birthdays’

Love is giving you that little handjob and not saving it for ‘taking the bins out when it’s raining’

Love is having a fuck once a week and not because you bought her that top she wanted from Tammy Girl "

Brought a tear to my eye that did.....

God I LOVE you Mystique ( hearty thing that goes pump pump )

and I mean LOVE like I LOVE Line of Duty ...... that much!

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

You do know Tammy Girl went awol in the 90's ..... ?

You don't buy her a dress that often do you ?

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By *ex HolesMan  over a year ago

Up North


"Love is getting a blow job without having to finish off the back bedroom skirting boards cause ‘they’ve not been painted for a while’

Love is having anal on none ‘birthdays’

Love is giving you that little handjob and not saving it for ‘taking the bins out when it’s raining’

Love is having a fuck once a week and not because you bought her that top she wanted from Tammy Girl

Brought a tear to my eye that did.....

God I LOVE you Mystique ( hearty thing that goes pump pump )

and I mean LOVE like I LOVE Line of Duty ...... that much! "

I can feel it through the WiFi waves Granny

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By *ex HolesMan  over a year ago

Up North


"You do know Tammy Girl went awol in the 90's ..... ?

You don't buy her a dress that often do you ?"

I think it’s called Tampax girl now

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Love is getting a blow job without having to finish off the back bedroom skirting boards cause ‘they’ve not been painted for a while’

Love is having anal on none ‘birthdays’

Love is giving you that little handjob and not saving it for ‘taking the bins out when it’s raining’

Love is having a fuck once a week and not because you bought her that top she wanted from Tammy Girl

Brought a tear to my eye that did.....

God I LOVE you Mystique ( hearty thing that goes pump pump )

and I mean LOVE like I LOVE Line of Duty ...... that much!

I can feel it through the WiFi waves Granny "

I have steam valves ....... wtf is WIFI ?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"You do know Tammy Girl went awol in the 90's ..... ?

You don't buy her a dress that often do you ?

I think it’s called Tampax girl now "

men buying your tampax ... now that is true love haha

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By *icky and MandyCouple  over a year ago

Bournemouth

...........

.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I don't believe in love in the holywoodian sense. I think what ppl experience at first is lust mistaken for love.

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By *ex HolesMan  over a year ago

Up North


"Love is getting a blow job without having to finish off the back bedroom skirting boards cause ‘they’ve not been painted for a while’

Love is having anal on none ‘birthdays’

Love is giving you that little handjob and not saving it for ‘taking the bins out when it’s raining’

Love is having a fuck once a week and not because you bought her that top she wanted from Tammy Girl

Brought a tear to my eye that did.....

God I LOVE you Mystique ( hearty thing that goes pump pump )

and I mean LOVE like I LOVE Line of Duty ...... that much!

I can feel it through the WiFi waves Granny

I have steam valves ....... wtf is WIFI ?"

It’s our inbuilt electrical impulse, our frequencies are very much aligned. Or should I say mine is approx 7.5 inches in tune with yours

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Memories cause love. Love kills.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Ahhhhhhhhhhh I thought it was WIFI ....... = Will It Fit In ? ( heart thing that goes pumpy pumpy )

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Memories cause love. Love kills."

I think that's going a bit far.....

Love hurts.

Love mars.

Love wounds and scars

Any heart not tough or strong enough .....

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By *assing Fancies xCouple  over a year ago

Sherwood Forest

Not smashing him in the face with a brick when he uses my £15 hair conditioner when bathing the dog

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Not smashing him in the face with a brick when he uses my £15 hair conditioner when bathing the dog "

That's so sweet xxx you are an angel.

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By *andybeachWoman  over a year ago

In the middle


"For me I think this poem by Lang Leav pretty much sums it up!

What was it like to love him? Asked Gratitude.

It was like being exhumed, I answered, and brought to life in a flash of brilliance.

What was it like to be loved in return? Asked Joy.

It was like being seen after a perpetual darkness, I replied. To be heard after a lifetime of silence.

What was it like to lose him? Asked Sorrow. There was a long pause before I responded:

It was like hearing every goodbye ever said to me—said all at once."

Ohh wow this has got me right in the heart today, three years ago today I lost my partner, I’ve been and put flowers on his grave and the finality of the goodbyes is a truly soul emptying crushing feeling

As for love it’s not all hearts n flowers it’s someone buying your favourite salad for tea, it’s someone who wants to be with you and isn’t afraid to let you know, it’s someone buying you a Minions mug for your birthday just because you laughed at the movie with him, it’s loving their quirks and not wanting to slap them quite so viciously when they do things that do annoy you, it’s laughing and cuddling and holding hand watching the telly in silence coz you don’t feel the need to be taking all the time.... yeah some of that is love for sure

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Memories cause love. Love kills.

I think that's going a bit far.....

Love hurts.

Love mars.

Love wounds and scars

Any heart not tough or strong enough ....."

Love could kill you inside...make you miserable.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Memories cause love. Love kills.

I think that's going a bit far.....

Love hurts.

Love mars.

Love wounds and scars

Any heart not tough or strong enough .....

Love could kill you inside...make you miserable."

I don't think it's love that does that x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Love is incredible and I miss it

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Memories cause love. Love kills.

I think that's going a bit far.....

Love hurts.

Love mars.

Love wounds and scars

Any heart not tough or strong enough .....

Love could kill you inside...make you miserable.

I don't think it's love that does that x "

Trust me.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple  over a year ago

North West

Love is making me cum while we have a quick cuddle and expecting nothing in return I Mr KC

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By *adame BWoman  over a year ago

C'est moi Boudoir


"For me I think this poem by Lang Leav pretty much sums it up!

What was it like to love him? Asked Gratitude.

It was like being exhumed, I answered, and brought to life in a flash of brilliance.

What was it like to be loved in return? Asked Joy.

It was like being seen after a perpetual darkness, I replied. To be heard after a lifetime of silence.

What was it like to lose him? Asked Sorrow. There was a long pause before I responded:

It was like hearing every goodbye ever said to me—said all at once.

Ohh wow this has got me right in the heart today, three years ago today I lost my partner, I’ve been and put flowers on his grave and the finality of the goodbyes is a truly soul emptying crushing feeling

As for love it’s not all hearts n flowers it’s someone buying your favourite salad for tea, it’s someone who wants to be with you and isn’t afraid to let you know, it’s someone buying you a Minions mug for your birthday just because you laughed at the movie with him, it’s loving their quirks and not wanting to slap them quite so viciously when they do things that do annoy you, it’s laughing and cuddling and holding hand watching the telly in silence coz you don’t feel the need to be taking all the time.... yeah some of that is love for sure "

(Hugs) for your loss and for the day that's in it.

Love is...actions not words.

It is a beautiful poem that has made me cry on many occasions

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Love is getting a blow job without having to finish off the back bedroom skirting boards cause ‘they’ve not been painted for a while’

Love is having anal on none ‘birthdays’

Love is giving you that little handjob and not saving it for ‘taking the bins out when it’s raining’

Love is having a fuck once a week and not because you bought her that top she wanted from Tammy Girl "

Tammy Girl? How old is your girlfriend? 12?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It's a big question, I'm not sure my brain can cope with British Summer Time AND this!

It would help if we had more specific language to categorise the different types of love, and a lesson on distinguishing between them in year 6 of primary school alongside the puberty talk, complete with pop quiz, badges and a packet of haribo for the highest score.

Personally I think any feelings for a partner before around 2 years into a relationship when you've really got to know them are attraction, lust and infatuation. Before then we get a highly edited version of a person as they're on their best behaviour and keen on making a good impression. "

I like this.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple  over a year ago

North West


"Love is getting a blow job without having to finish off the back bedroom skirting boards cause ‘they’ve not been painted for a while’

Love is having anal on none ‘birthdays’

Love is giving you that little handjob and not saving it for ‘taking the bins out when it’s raining’

Love is having a fuck once a week and not because you bought her that top she wanted from Tammy Girl

Tammy Girl? How old is your girlfriend? 12?"

She was, in 1995

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex


"Not smashing him in the face with a brick when he uses my £15 hair conditioner when bathing the dog "

.

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By *iaisonseekerMan  over a year ago

Liverpool

"Sex is the consolation for those who do not find enough love."

Gabriel Garcia Marquez

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By *2000ManMan  over a year ago

Worthing

In my experience, it's if you start thinking about the other person involuntarily when they are not around.

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By *heSofaDestroyersCouple  over a year ago

HereAndThere

Love for me is that snuggle at the end of the night when I’m falling asleep spooned into Mr Sofa’s hot ass, or in my spot on his chest/underarm. That feels like home to me

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