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Mistaken Proposal
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Hi,
My Dear Good Male Friend has just mailed me in a very distraught state.
He got quite intoxicated last night and proposed to his GF not meaning to do so. She said yes and now he doesn't know how he's gonna get out of this nightmare situation... 
I've advised him to tell her straight away he didn't mean it and to do so immediately. But the only thing is...she's told quite a few people already as he's received congratulatory msgs. Obviously there's no ring but his GF keeps mailing him pics of engagement rings at this moment.
He's just mailed me and said he thinks it's a case of he's made his bed. I'm trying to tell him cop on if it's a genuine stupid d*unken mistake and get out now.
Has this happened to anyone else ever. Or what's the most stupid ridiculous d*unken mistake you have ever done??? |
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"Hi,
My Dear Good Male Friend has just mailed me in a very distraught state.
He got quite intoxicated last night and proposed to his GF not meaning to do so. She said yes and now he doesn't know how he's gonna get out of this nightmare situation...
I've advised him to tell her straight away he didn't mean it and to do so immediately. But the only thing is...she's told quite a few people already as he's received congratulatory msgs. Obviously there's no ring but his GF keeps mailing him pics of engagement rings at this moment.
He's just mailed me and said he thinks it's a case of he's made his bed. I'm trying to tell him cop on if it's a genuine stupid d*unken mistake and get out now.
Has this happened to anyone else ever. Or what's the most stupid ridiculous d*unken mistake you have ever done???"
First thing he needs to do is assess his drinking, doing stuff like that while d*unk is a sign of a problem, a lack of control which has now going to cause someone close to him pain and embarrassment.
Then he just needs to put on his big boy pants and deal with it ASAP. The longer he waits the worse it gets. And I don’t think there’s any good way to handle this. Sit them down, talk like adults, and try his best to make things right |
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Not an easy one to get out of
If he still wants to date her can they not just have a long engagement with no engagement party, then if they can’t agree on that then maybe it was a bit rash to get engaged in the first place - that would save the gf feelings a bit |
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He needs to ask himself if he was intending to actually marry her at some point in the future anyway, if he was then I'd leave it as it is. After telling her it was a mistake it's likely to dent the relationship but obviously if he doesn't want to marry her then he has to tell her asap. |
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His poor gf and why is he mailing you instead of sitting down like a grown man and talking to her about it. He sounds like an immature coward. Why let her tell others.
If he is happy for her to be devastated if she knew the truth or that he only married her because he felt he had to go through with it, then she would be better off without him. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Oh boy this is terrible would not want to be in his shoes but that’s what happens when you get d*unk etc and your inhibitions go out the window "
Yea my heart goes out to him... He's in work at min so he's just gonna have to face it when he gets home...pity it's not fast forward to April 1st...he might have some excuse... I don't understand it tbh...I have said to him it must have been in your mind somewhere for you to propose...he's saying it wasn't |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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He can't possibly have been so intoxicated that the proposal came out of nowhere... He must have had it slightly in his mind at least. And surely if he really was that drink, she would have noticed?
If he considers being engaged to his girlfriend a "nightmare" then she probably isn't for him, and he should end it.
Not an ideal situation for him or her, either way. I hope it gets resolved! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I see trouble ahead.
He needs to sort it out. Pronto.
Although to be fair, if a man d*unkenly proposes to me, I tell them to ask me again when they’re sober. "
Yes, now you said it. I'd defo do the same. Ask me when you're sober pls |
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"His poor gf and why is he mailing you instead of sitting down like a grown man and talking to her about it. He sounds like an immature coward. Why let her tell others.
If he is happy for her to be devastated if she knew the truth or that he only married her because he felt he had to go through with it, then she would be better off without him. "
To be honest if I did something equally as ridiculous, I'd be asking my friends for advice. It's what friends are for is it not?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Oh boy this is terrible would not want to be in his shoes but that’s what happens when you get d*unk etc and your inhibitions go out the window
Yea my heart goes out to him... He's in work at min so he's just gonna have to face it when he gets home...pity it's not fast forward to April 1st...he might have some excuse... I don't understand it tbh...I have said to him it must have been in your mind somewhere for you to propose...he's saying it wasn't "
What a horrible situation for his poor fiance, sooner he tells her the better and hopefully she will see what a twat he is. Nobody deserves that, and she certainly doesn't deserve to have her business aired publicly
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I've ever been d*unk enough to do anything that stupid and hurtful to another person. I have worn vodka goggles on occasion and turned up for a second date with men who really weren't my type at all though |
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Oh crikey me. What a position to be in
My husband proposed to me when he was d*unk. I said no as I didn't want him to wake up sober the next day and have any regrets.
He did make me wait a few months before he proposed again.
He needs to sit her down and talk honestly. If she loves him she will 100% understand. If she doesn't, then maybe she isn't the right woman for him.
Mrs |
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"His poor gf and why is he mailing you instead of sitting down like a grown man and talking to her about it. He sounds like an immature coward. Why let her tell others.
If he is happy for her to be devastated if she knew the truth or that he only married her because he felt he had to go through with it, then she would be better off without him. "
This ....
What’s the betting he will go through with it and then join somewhere like here and be ‘one of those’ |
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"Oh boy this is terrible would not want to be in his shoes but that’s what happens when you get d*unk etc and your inhibitions go out the window
Yea my heart goes out to him... He's in work at min so he's just gonna have to face it when he gets home...pity it's not fast forward to April 1st...he might have some excuse... I don't understand it tbh...I have said to him it must have been in your mind somewhere for you to propose...he's saying it wasn't
What a horrible situation for his poor fiance, sooner he tells her the better and hopefully she will see what a twat he is. Nobody deserves that, and she certainly doesn't deserve to have her business aired publicly
"
 |
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"Oh boy this is terrible would not want to be in his shoes but that’s what happens when you get d*unk etc and your inhibitions go out the window
Yea my heart goes out to him... He's in work at min so he's just gonna have to face it when he gets home...pity it's not fast forward to April 1st...he might have some excuse... I don't understand it tbh...I have said to him it must have been in your mind somewhere for you to propose...he's saying it wasn't
What a horrible situation for his poor fiance, sooner he tells her the better and hopefully she will see what a twat he is. Nobody deserves that, and she certainly doesn't deserve to have her business aired publicly
"
Yeah he's definitely not ready to be married to her if she wasn't the first person he turned to with this. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I feel really sorry for his GF.
This is awful and he needs to deal with this immediately and if he has no intention of marrying her any time soon he needs to her otherwise its cruel to string her along. |
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"Hi,
My Dear Good Male Friend has just mailed me in a very distraught state.
He got quite intoxicated last night and proposed to his GF not meaning to do so. She said yes and now he doesn't know how he's gonna get out of this nightmare situation...
I've advised him to tell her straight away he didn't mean it and to do so immediately. But the only thing is...she's told quite a few people already as he's received congratulatory msgs. Obviously there's no ring but his GF keeps mailing him pics of engagement rings at this moment.
He's just mailed me and said he thinks it's a case of he's made his bed. I'm trying to tell him cop on if it's a genuine stupid d*unken mistake and get out now.
Has this happened to anyone else ever. Or what's the most stupid ridiculous d*unken mistake you have ever done???"
Deny it was him and blame a Doppelgänger
Or
Do everything she hates and get her to call it off
Or
Leave a pair of women's knickers in the car or bed so she'll find them.
I bought an old helicopter for a garden man cave after a nights drinking and around one 150 wooden spoons.
Also bought a record for £2000 which I wanted but couldn't afford, luckily it's now worth significantly more. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"OP did he actually propose? Or was it one of those one day we might, and she's got ahead of herself?
"
He actually proposed... Wtf... It's a bit blurry and vague for him. I'm now thinking after reading some comments that she should know better than to accept a d*unken proposal. They're together a year. I have said to him just now...could he have seen himself marry her ever and if so maybe just have a long engagement. He's gone quite. I actually feel like giving him a slap at this stage
Thanks for feedback... Much appreciated |
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"OP did he actually propose? Or was it one of those one day we might, and she's got ahead of herself?
He actually proposed... Wtf... It's a bit blurry and vague for him. I'm now thinking after reading some comments that she should know better than to accept a d*unken proposal. They're together a year. I have said to him just now...could he have seen himself marry her ever and if so maybe just have a long engagement. He's gone quite. I actually feel like giving him a slap at this stage
Thanks for feedback... Much appreciated "
So how much input did the woman have in this proposal? Now I'm not saying what he did is right, but she may have guided him to making this proposal. Not all men are evil out to make woman sad, as are not all women are totally innocent as some on this thread would makes us believe. Time for him to collect his thoughts on how this happened and then a good long talk with his girlfriend. |
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"OP did he actually propose? Or was it one of those one day we might, and she's got ahead of herself?
He actually proposed... Wtf... It's a bit blurry and vague for him. I'm now thinking after reading some comments that she should know better than to accept a d*unken proposal. They're together a year. I have said to him just now...could he have seen himself marry her ever and if so maybe just have a long engagement. He's gone quite. I actually feel like giving him a slap at this stage
Thanks for feedback... Much appreciated "
No, don't go down the road of thinking she's in any way responsible for accepting a proposal when the proposer didn't mean it. |
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"OP did he actually propose? Or was it one of those one day we might, and she's got ahead of herself?
He actually proposed... Wtf... It's a bit blurry and vague for him. I'm now thinking after reading some comments that she should know better than to accept a d*unken proposal. They're together a year. I have said to him just now...could he have seen himself marry her ever and if so maybe just have a long engagement. He's gone quite. I actually feel like giving him a slap at this stage
Thanks for feedback... Much appreciated
No, don't go down the road of thinking she's in any way responsible for accepting a proposal when the proposer didn't mean it. "
This I agree with, but do question the telling everyone early morning before chatting the male and sending ring pictures. This seems a bit wrong to me and would make me feel pressurised in this kind of situation. |
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"OP did he actually propose? Or was it one of those one day we might, and she's got ahead of herself?
He actually proposed... Wtf... It's a bit blurry and vague for him. I'm now thinking after reading some comments that she should know better than to accept a d*unken proposal. They're together a year. I have said to him just now...could he have seen himself marry her ever and if so maybe just have a long engagement. He's gone quite. I actually feel like giving him a slap at this stage
Thanks for feedback... Much appreciated
No, don't go down the road of thinking she's in any way responsible for accepting a proposal when the proposer didn't mean it.
This I agree with, but do question the telling everyone early morning before chatting the male and sending ring pictures. This seems a bit wrong to me and would make me feel pressurised in this kind of situation. "
or maybe she's just simply excited about being engaged, like most would be |
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"OP did he actually propose? Or was it one of those one day we might, and she's got ahead of herself?
He actually proposed... Wtf... It's a bit blurry and vague for him. I'm now thinking after reading some comments that she should know better than to accept a d*unken proposal. They're together a year. I have said to him just now...could he have seen himself marry her ever and if so maybe just have a long engagement. He's gone quite. I actually feel like giving him a slap at this stage
Thanks for feedback... Much appreciated
No, don't go down the road of thinking she's in any way responsible for accepting a proposal when the proposer didn't mean it.
This I agree with, but do question the telling everyone early morning before chatting the male and sending ring pictures. This seems a bit wrong to me and would make me feel pressurised in this kind of situation. or maybe she's just simply excited about being engaged, like most would be"
That's the thing we don't actually know as we aren't them, there's always two sides to a story. Though I'd be upset if my other half told everyone before I could tell my family. And as a couple I would want to chat about how to announce it together as a couple. |
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I can’t offer any advice other than, just tell her straight.
I don’t have much sympathy for either of them.
Get d*unk and propose.
Think a proposal, of any kind, from someone who is d*unk is genuine.
Perhaps they were just made for each other after all. |
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"OP did he actually propose? Or was it one of those one day we might, and she's got ahead of herself?
He actually proposed... Wtf... It's a bit blurry and vague for him. I'm now thinking after reading some comments that she should know better than to accept a d*unken proposal. They're together a year. I have said to him just now...could he have seen himself marry her ever and if so maybe just have a long engagement. He's gone quite. I actually feel like giving him a slap at this stage
Thanks for feedback... Much appreciated
No, don't go down the road of thinking she's in any way responsible for accepting a proposal when the proposer didn't mean it.
This I agree with, but do question the telling everyone early morning before chatting the male and sending ring pictures. This seems a bit wrong to me and would make me feel pressurised in this kind of situation. "
Why wrong? He proposed, she assumed he meant it so told friends and looked at engagement rings.
He panicked and contacted you instead of her  .
It's a horrible situation to be in but she's the one who is going to be humiliated and hurt, he should put a stop to it and fast |
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"OP did he actually propose? Or was it one of those one day we might, and she's got ahead of herself?
He actually proposed... Wtf... It's a bit blurry and vague for him. I'm now thinking after reading some comments that she should know better than to accept a d*unken proposal. They're together a year. I have said to him just now...could he have seen himself marry her ever and if so maybe just have a long engagement. He's gone quite. I actually feel like giving him a slap at this stage
Thanks for feedback... Much appreciated
No, don't go down the road of thinking she's in any way responsible for accepting a proposal when the proposer didn't mean it.
This I agree with, but do question the telling everyone early morning before chatting the male and sending ring pictures. This seems a bit wrong to me and would make me feel pressurised in this kind of situation.
Why wrong? He proposed, she assumed he meant it so told friends and looked at engagement rings.
He panicked and contacted you instead of her .
It's a horrible situation to be in but she's the one who is going to be humiliated and hurt, he should put a stop to it and fast "
Isn't announcing an engagement something you do as a couple though? I'd be upset if my OH told all his friends before I told my family.
I do agree he needs to put a stop to this before it goes any further. |
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"Hi,
My Dear Good Male Friend has just mailed me in a very distraught state.
He got quite intoxicated last night and proposed to his GF not meaning to do so. She said yes and now he doesn't know how he's gonna get out of this nightmare situation...
I've advised him to tell her straight away he didn't mean it and to do so immediately. But the only thing is...she's told quite a few people already as he's received congratulatory msgs. Obviously there's no ring but his GF keeps mailing him pics of engagement rings at this moment.
He's just mailed me and said he thinks it's a case of he's made his bed. I'm trying to tell him cop on if it's a genuine stupid d*unken mistake and get out now.
Has this happened to anyone else ever. Or what's the most stupid ridiculous d*unken mistake you have ever done???"
Oh this sounds sooooo familiar. I (Jason) was on e asked if I liked battlestar Galactica. Since I'm a sci fi nerd I said " marry me tomorrow" . Next I knew 3 months later the wedding was booked and arranged. I got caught up in the tidal wave I've her excitement and I hate hurting people. We got married 8 months after that throw away comment and divorced 2 years later. Was a huge mistake but we are still friends. Never should have been more than that.
So sit her down and apologize, but still buy her something nice and overpriced. Spoil her for as long as it takes to get her to forgive you. And if it's where you two end up then do it in an ott way to show you mean it this time.  |
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"OP did he actually propose? Or was it one of those one day we might, and she's got ahead of herself?
He actually proposed... Wtf... It's a bit blurry and vague for him. I'm now thinking after reading some comments that she should know better than to accept a d*unken proposal. They're together a year. I have said to him just now...could he have seen himself marry her ever and if so maybe just have a long engagement. He's gone quite. I actually feel like giving him a slap at this stage
Thanks for feedback... Much appreciated
No, don't go down the road of thinking she's in any way responsible for accepting a proposal when the proposer didn't mean it.
This I agree with, but do question the telling everyone early morning before chatting the male and sending ring pictures. This seems a bit wrong to me and would make me feel pressurised in this kind of situation.
Why wrong? He proposed, she assumed he meant it so told friends and looked at engagement rings.
He panicked and contacted you instead of her .
It's a horrible situation to be in but she's the one who is going to be humiliated and hurt, he should put a stop to it and fast
Isn't announcing an engagement something you do as a couple though? I'd be upset if my OH told all his friends before I told my family.
I do agree he needs to put a stop to this before it goes any further. "
To be honest I feel it's the lesser of the two evils but neither of them seem as if they're in it together. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm invested in this now, do let us know what happens op. "
I sure will. No word from him in a few hrs ... He's gone quite...probably with remorse, guilts and on a downer... My heart does go out to him tbh...whatever was he drinking |
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"I'm invested in this now, do let us know what happens op.
I sure will. No word from him in a few hrs ... He's gone quite...probably with remorse, guilts and on a downer... My heart does go out to him tbh...whatever was he drinking "
Find out because I never want to touch it  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I suggest he stays d*unk permanently and makes the best of it.
Poor chap"
Lol I don't know how he's gonna get outta this one... All he wants to do at min is go home and climb into bed. Nothing will be said today I reckon. Not unless he tackles it tomorrow... Ooooooohhh and it was strong percentage Russian vodka that he drank He has no idea where this proposal came out of...well obviously his mouth but he has no idea why he did it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I can’t offer any advice other than, just tell her straight.
I don’t have much sympathy for either of them.
Get d*unk and propose.
Think a proposal, of any kind, from someone who is d*unk is genuine.
Perhaps they were just made for each other after all. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The wife sent me a single rose with an in deepest sympathy card on it asking me to marry her, it was leap year.
I said yes and we got married, fast forward to about 10 years later and she said that she only did it as a joke and thought I would laugh or tell her to sod off.
We did have a good laugh about it and are still together. In your friends case though I'd say he's buggered however he handles it  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"OP did he actually propose? Or was it one of those one day we might, and she's got ahead of herself?
He actually proposed... Wtf... It's a bit blurry and vague for him. I'm now thinking after reading some comments that she should know better than to accept a d*unken proposal. They're together a year. I have said to him just now...could he have seen himself marry her ever and if so maybe just have a long engagement. He's gone quite. I actually feel like giving him a slap at this stage
Thanks for feedback... Much appreciated
No, don't go down the road of thinking she's in any way responsible for accepting a proposal when the proposer didn't mean it.
This I agree with, but do question the telling everyone early morning before chatting the male and sending ring pictures. This seems a bit wrong to me and would make me feel pressurised in this kind of situation. or maybe she's just simply excited about being engaged, like most would be"
Exactly and I think its terrible that some are suggesting that somehow she's in the wrong.
He says he was too d*unk to know what he was doing but he seems to remember it well enough to tell the OP.
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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
South Wales |
I stand by the fact that if a man was obviously d*unk and asked me to marry him I would say no, and ask him to ask me again when sober.
I would not take advantage of his d*unken state to say “yes! He asked me to marry him and that’s it, he said it, we are doing it”.
I would wait until the morning and say “oi beer breath, you asked me to marry you last night! Did you mean it?” And he could either say “like fuck did I!!!” or “yes my sweet, make me the happiest man alive and be my wife”. Then I’d be on the phone telling everyone.
We say women are not to be taken advantage of when d*unk, surely this applies to men too?
Obviously the full facts of this post are not known, but I think both are to blame. Both are adults. Both should be able to communicate with each other openly and honestly about what was said and meant.
And personally, if someone asks me to marry them I want them to do it sober and with romance. And so I stick by my original post.
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I really really hope she's clicked that he was in a state when he asked and she's teaching him a lesson to cut down drinking coz he makes stupid fucking decisions and doesn't mean what he says when he's pissed |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I really really hope she's clicked that he was in a state when he asked and she's teaching him a lesson to cut down drinking coz he makes stupid fucking decisions and doesn't mean what he says when he's pissed "
Stop drinking it's simple.
The money saved could go on a holiday together where he could ask her to marry him..... Oh wait |
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"I stand by the fact that if a man was obviously d*unk and asked me to marry him I would say no, and ask him to ask me again when sober.
I would not take advantage of his d*unken state to say “yes! He asked me to marry him and that’s it, he said it, we are doing it”.
I would wait until the morning and say “oi beer breath, you asked me to marry you last night! Did you mean it?” And he could either say “like fuck did I!!!” or “yes my sweet, make me the happiest man alive and be my wife”. Then I’d be on the phone telling everyone.
We say women are not to be taken advantage of when d*unk, surely this applies to men too?
Obviously the full facts of this post are not known, but I think both are to blame. Both are adults. Both should be able to communicate with each other openly and honestly about what was said and meant.
And personally, if someone asks me to marry them I want them to do it sober and with romance. And so I stick by my original post.
"
You make a very good point. However he can get out of this with relative ease. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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He's going ahead with it... The engagement...
He has asked me to keep it quiet... About disclosing... That he didn't mean to propose... Oooooooppps...
She has chosen the ring online
What can I say to him now... Nothing. He hasn't listened.
Hopefully it works out that's all I said. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I really really hope she's clicked that he was in a state when he asked and she's teaching him a lesson to cut down drinking coz he makes stupid fucking decisions and doesn't mean what he says when he's pissed "
Or maybe she senses the relationship isn't great and is clinging on to those little moments of hope.
Whatever it is and however it is she is in no way to blame for his stupidity |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Maybe they both got a bit too excited, a straight talking conversation can still be an honourable exit for all. He could explain how he got overly excited, or d*unk and misjudged things, or misread cues, whatever, and she can roll with those. I know men and women who have made daft decisions or proposals when d*unk, always best to revisit those when sober 
A short term bit of sorting things out will save a lot of unspoken anger or pressure too, and long term issues. No major dramas, just needs an upfront conversation. |
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"He's going ahead with it... The engagement...
He has asked me to keep it quiet... About disclosing... That he didn't mean to propose... Oooooooppps...
She has chosen the ring online
What can I say to him now... Nothing. He hasn't listened.
Hopefully it works out that's all I said. "
Oh dear, a reluctant groom. What could possibly go wrong? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"He's going ahead with it... The engagement...
He has asked me to keep it quiet... About disclosing... That he didn't mean to propose... Oooooooppps...
She has chosen the ring online
What can I say to him now... Nothing. He hasn't listened.
Hopefully it works out that's all I said. "
Or maybe he did mean to propose and he is just telling you that.
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"He's going ahead with it... The engagement...
He has asked me to keep it quiet... About disclosing... That he didn't mean to propose... Oooooooppps...
She has chosen the ring online
What can I say to him now... Nothing. He hasn't listened.
Hopefully it works out that's all I said.
Or maybe he did mean to propose and he is just telling you that.
"
I thought that. Maybe he is a drama queen .
Either way if someone was going around telling people that they proposed to me by MISTAKE ............ they need to fuck off.......
what a vile man.
Not the d*unkeness but the disrespect and cowardice. |
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"He's going ahead with it... The engagement...
He has asked me to keep it quiet... About disclosing... That he didn't mean to propose... Oooooooppps...
She has chosen the ring online
What can I say to him now... Nothing. He hasn't listened.
Hopefully it works out that's all I said.
Or maybe he did mean to propose and he is just telling you that.
"
Mr N was just talking to me about this and he said the same thing. He also wondered how long they'd been together |
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"He's going ahead with it... The engagement...
He has asked me to keep it quiet... About disclosing... That he didn't mean to propose... Oooooooppps...
She has chosen the ring online
What can I say to him now... Nothing. He hasn't listened.
Hopefully it works out that's all I said.
Or maybe he did mean to propose and he is just telling you that.
I thought that. Maybe he is a drama queen .
Either way if someone was going around telling people that they proposed to me by MISTAKE ............ they need to fuck off.......
what a vile man.
Not the d*unkeness but the disrespect and cowardice."
That, I suspect is what he's afraid of. He doesn't want to lose her |
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"Our son and his friend posted their trousers to Argentina when they were d*unk. That was really daft but they could always buy another pair "
Did they post them to anyone in particular or just randomly Argentina? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I stand by the fact that if a man was obviously d*unk and asked me to marry him I would say no, and ask him to ask me again when sober.
I would not take advantage of his d*unken state to say “yes! He asked me to marry him and that’s it, he said it, we are doing it”.
I would wait until the morning and say “oi beer breath, you asked me to marry you last night! Did you mean it?” And he could either say “like fuck did I!!!” or “yes my sweet, make me the happiest man alive and be my wife”. Then I’d be on the phone telling everyone.
We say women are not to be taken advantage of when d*unk, surely this applies to men too?
Obviously the full facts of this post are not known, but I think both are to blame. Both are adults. Both should be able to communicate with each other openly and honestly about what was said and meant.
And personally, if someone asks me to marry them I want them to do it sober and with romance. And so I stick by my original post.
"
I agree with this.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"OP did he actually propose? Or was it one of those one day we might, and she's got ahead of herself?
He actually proposed... Wtf... It's a bit blurry and vague for him. I'm now thinking after reading some comments that she should know better than to accept a d*unken proposal. They're together a year. I have said to him just now...could he have seen himself marry her ever and if so maybe just have a long engagement. He's gone quite. I actually feel like giving him a slap at this stage
Thanks for feedback... Much appreciated
No, don't go down the road of thinking she's in any way responsible for accepting a proposal when the proposer didn't mean it. "
i think she has to take some responsibility
if you want to build a life with someone it should be as a result of multiple conversations about where your life is heading together , wether that be conversation in the lead up to the proposal or after it , not one d*unk out of the blue question and then you run off telling everyone you are engaged |
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By *edeWoman
over a year ago
the abyss |
He needs to talk to her now!!!
Unless he had already thought and spoken about marriage with her then he isn't ready.
You can't just 'get married' because you are embarrassed you made a mistake. He needs to have a serious talk with her and sort it out sooner rathrr than later.
Not being funny but I wouldn't take a d*unk proposal seriously in the first place so on the one hand she has some part to play.
Communication is key!  |
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"He needs to talk to her now!!!
Unless he had already thought and spoken about marriage with her then he isn't ready.
You can't just 'get married' because you are embarrassed you made a mistake. He needs to have a serious talk with her and sort it out sooner rathrr than later.
Not being funny but I wouldn't take a d*unk proposal seriously in the first place so on the one hand she has some part to play.
Communication is key! "
That's why I'd be more inclined to think she's trying to teach him a lesson.
Saying that, I'm sure there's a saying about "d*unk lips telling no lies" or something like that so maybe she thinks he let go of inner fears and found the courage to ask when d*unk. Who knows. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"He needs to talk to her now!!!
Unless he had already thought and spoken about marriage with her then he isn't ready.
You can't just 'get married' because you are embarrassed you made a mistake. He needs to have a serious talk with her and sort it out sooner rathrr than later.
Not being funny but I wouldn't take a d*unk proposal seriously in the first place so on the one hand she has some part to play.
Communication is key!
That's why I'd be more inclined to think she's trying to teach him a lesson.
Saying that, I'm sure there's a saying about "d*unk lips telling no lies" or something like that so maybe she thinks he let go of inner fears and found the courage to ask when d*unk. Who knows."
Good point about her maybe trying to teach him a lesson. I hope she is!!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"He needs to talk to her now!!!
Unless he had already thought and spoken about marriage with her then he isn't ready.
You can't just 'get married' because you are embarrassed you made a mistake. He needs to have a serious talk with her and sort it out sooner rathrr than later.
Not being funny but I wouldn't take a d*unk proposal seriously in the first place so on the one hand she has some part to play.
Communication is key!
That's why I'd be more inclined to think she's trying to teach him a lesson.
Saying that, I'm sure there's a saying about "d*unk lips telling no lies" or something like that so maybe she thinks he let go of inner fears and found the courage to ask when d*unk. Who knows."
you would have a discussion sober the next day though surely before telling everyone - even if just to solidify your own thought on it
do people in their right mind really decide to spend the rest of their life with someone as a result of one d*unken question |
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"He needs to talk to her now!!!
Unless he had already thought and spoken about marriage with her then he isn't ready.
You can't just 'get married' because you are embarrassed you made a mistake. He needs to have a serious talk with her and sort it out sooner rathrr than later.
Not being funny but I wouldn't take a d*unk proposal seriously in the first place so on the one hand she has some part to play.
Communication is key!
That's why I'd be more inclined to think she's trying to teach him a lesson.
Saying that, I'm sure there's a saying about "d*unk lips telling no lies" or something like that so maybe she thinks he let go of inner fears and found the courage to ask when d*unk. Who knows.
you would have a discussion sober the next day though surely before telling everyone - even if just to solidify your own thought on it
do people in their right mind really decide to spend the rest of their life with someone as a result of one d*unken question "
Not if I was trying to prove a point. If he often said things he didn't mean when pissed and it was getting to me I'd play along and make that fucker squirm, hoping that it may make him rethink the alcohol consumption and the impact of saying things you don't mean. |
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"He needs to talk to her now!!!
Unless he had already thought and spoken about marriage with her then he isn't ready.
You can't just 'get married' because you are embarrassed you made a mistake. He needs to have a serious talk with her and sort it out sooner rathrr than later.
Not being funny but I wouldn't take a d*unk proposal seriously in the first place so on the one hand she has some part to play.
Communication is key!
That's why I'd be more inclined to think she's trying to teach him a lesson.
Saying that, I'm sure there's a saying about "d*unk lips telling no lies" or something like that so maybe she thinks he let go of inner fears and found the courage to ask when d*unk. Who knows.
you would have a discussion sober the next day though surely before telling everyone - even if just to solidify your own thought on it
do people in their right mind really decide to spend the rest of their life with someone as a result of one d*unken question
Not if I was trying to prove a point. If he often said things he didn't mean when pissed and it was getting to me I'd play along and make that fucker squirm, hoping that it may make him rethink the alcohol consumption and the impact of saying things you don't mean."
I mean, i wouldn't be announcing it on social media, but may contact a few people with a "play along for a few hours" text and give them the backstory.
They may be the kind of couple that prank each other, I've no idea
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"He needs to talk to her now!!!
Unless he had already thought and spoken about marriage with her then he isn't ready.
You can't just 'get married' because you are embarrassed you made a mistake. He needs to have a serious talk with her and sort it out sooner rathrr than later.
Not being funny but I wouldn't take a d*unk proposal seriously in the first place so on the one hand she has some part to play.
Communication is key!
That's why I'd be more inclined to think she's trying to teach him a lesson.
Saying that, I'm sure there's a saying about "d*unk lips telling no lies" or something like that so maybe she thinks he let go of inner fears and found the courage to ask when d*unk. Who knows.
you would have a discussion sober the next day though surely before telling everyone - even if just to solidify your own thought on it
do people in their right mind really decide to spend the rest of their life with someone as a result of one d*unken question
Not if I was trying to prove a point. If he often said things he didn't mean when pissed and it was getting to me I'd play along and make that fucker squirm, hoping that it may make him rethink the alcohol consumption and the impact of saying things you don't mean."
see i think that more than anything else in the situation would be grounds for a break up
if he made a d*unk mistake and it was discussed adultly and resolved then a relationship might survive that , but soberly and consciously dragging it out to prove a point is just manipulation and a sign the relationship doesn’t work anyway (much like him soberly and consciously deciding to just go along with it to keep her happy) |
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By *edeWoman
over a year ago
the abyss |
"He needs to talk to her now!!!
Unless he had already thought and spoken about marriage with her then he isn't ready.
You can't just 'get married' because you are embarrassed you made a mistake. He needs to have a serious talk with her and sort it out sooner rathrr than later.
Not being funny but I wouldn't take a d*unk proposal seriously in the first place so on the one hand she has some part to play.
Communication is key!
That's why I'd be more inclined to think she's trying to teach him a lesson.
Saying that, I'm sure there's a saying about "d*unk lips telling no lies" or something like that so maybe she thinks he let go of inner fears and found the courage to ask when d*unk. Who knows.
you would have a discussion sober the next day though surely before telling everyone - even if just to solidify your own thought on it
do people in their right mind really decide to spend the rest of their life with someone as a result of one d*unken question
Not if I was trying to prove a point. If he often said things he didn't mean when pissed and it was getting to me I'd play along and make that fucker squirm, hoping that it may make him rethink the alcohol consumption and the impact of saying things you don't mean."
this is why I love you Peach |
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"He needs to talk to her now!!!
Unless he had already thought and spoken about marriage with her then he isn't ready.
You can't just 'get married' because you are embarrassed you made a mistake. He needs to have a serious talk with her and sort it out sooner rathrr than later.
Not being funny but I wouldn't take a d*unk proposal seriously in the first place so on the one hand she has some part to play.
Communication is key!
That's why I'd be more inclined to think she's trying to teach him a lesson.
Saying that, I'm sure there's a saying about "d*unk lips telling no lies" or something like that so maybe she thinks he let go of inner fears and found the courage to ask when d*unk. Who knows.
you would have a discussion sober the next day though surely before telling everyone - even if just to solidify your own thought on it
do people in their right mind really decide to spend the rest of their life with someone as a result of one d*unken question
Not if I was trying to prove a point. If he often said things he didn't mean when pissed and it was getting to me I'd play along and make that fucker squirm, hoping that it may make him rethink the alcohol consumption and the impact of saying things you don't mean.
see i think that more than anything else in the situation would be grounds for a break up
if he made a d*unk mistake and it was discussed adultly and resolved then a relationship might survive that , but soberly and consciously dragging it out to prove a point is just manipulation and a sign the relationship doesn’t work anyway (much like him soberly and consciously deciding to just go along with it to keep her happy) "
None of us know if there's already been discussions over drinking levels and she's already expressed concern over his d*unk actions.
But, I'm not relationship material and have learned that I'm worthless and voiceless until there's a big dilemma that needs major action to save myself. By that time I'd probably be relieved if the relationship broke down, coz I'd have worn myself out trying to "save" the other person. |
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"He needs to talk to her now!!!
Unless he had already thought and spoken about marriage with her then he isn't ready.
You can't just 'get married' because you are embarrassed you made a mistake. He needs to have a serious talk with her and sort it out sooner rathrr than later.
Not being funny but I wouldn't take a d*unk proposal seriously in the first place so on the one hand she has some part to play.
Communication is key!
That's why I'd be more inclined to think she's trying to teach him a lesson.
Saying that, I'm sure there's a saying about "d*unk lips telling no lies" or something like that so maybe she thinks he let go of inner fears and found the courage to ask when d*unk. Who knows.
you would have a discussion sober the next day though surely before telling everyone - even if just to solidify your own thought on it
do people in their right mind really decide to spend the rest of their life with someone as a result of one d*unken question "
Exactly this. Clarify something life changing like that when sober. I don't take anything that anyone says seriously when they are d*unk. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"He needs to talk to her now!!!
Unless he had already thought and spoken about marriage with her then he isn't ready.
You can't just 'get married' because you are embarrassed you made a mistake. He needs to have a serious talk with her and sort it out sooner rathrr than later.
Not being funny but I wouldn't take a d*unk proposal seriously in the first place so on the one hand she has some part to play.
Communication is key!
That's why I'd be more inclined to think she's trying to teach him a lesson.
Saying that, I'm sure there's a saying about "d*unk lips telling no lies" or something like that so maybe she thinks he let go of inner fears and found the courage to ask when d*unk. Who knows.
you would have a discussion sober the next day though surely before telling everyone - even if just to solidify your own thought on it
do people in their right mind really decide to spend the rest of their life with someone as a result of one d*unken question
Not if I was trying to prove a point. If he often said things he didn't mean when pissed and it was getting to me I'd play along and make that fucker squirm, hoping that it may make him rethink the alcohol consumption and the impact of saying things you don't mean.
see i think that more than anything else in the situation would be grounds for a break up
if he made a d*unk mistake and it was discussed adultly and resolved then a relationship might survive that , but soberly and consciously dragging it out to prove a point is just manipulation and a sign the relationship doesn’t work anyway (much like him soberly and consciously deciding to just go along with it to keep her happy)
None of us know if there's already been discussions over drinking levels and she's already expressed concern over his d*unk actions.
But, I'm not relationship material and have learned that I'm worthless and voiceless until there's a big dilemma that needs major action to save myself. By that time I'd probably be relieved if the relationship broke down, coz I'd have worn myself out trying to "save" the other person."
i think some crap people might have made you feel like that , but it doesn’t mean you have learned something that is true |
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"He needs to talk to her now!!!
Unless he had already thought and spoken about marriage with her then he isn't ready.
You can't just 'get married' because you are embarrassed you made a mistake. He needs to have a serious talk with her and sort it out sooner rathrr than later.
Not being funny but I wouldn't take a d*unk proposal seriously in the first place so on the one hand she has some part to play.
Communication is key!
That's why I'd be more inclined to think she's trying to teach him a lesson.
Saying that, I'm sure there's a saying about "d*unk lips telling no lies" or something like that so maybe she thinks he let go of inner fears and found the courage to ask when d*unk. Who knows.
you would have a discussion sober the next day though surely before telling everyone - even if just to solidify your own thought on it
do people in their right mind really decide to spend the rest of their life with someone as a result of one d*unken question
Not if I was trying to prove a point. If he often said things he didn't mean when pissed and it was getting to me I'd play along and make that fucker squirm, hoping that it may make him rethink the alcohol consumption and the impact of saying things you don't mean.
see i think that more than anything else in the situation would be grounds for a break up
if he made a d*unk mistake and it was discussed adultly and resolved then a relationship might survive that , but soberly and consciously dragging it out to prove a point is just manipulation and a sign the relationship doesn’t work anyway (much like him soberly and consciously deciding to just go along with it to keep her happy)
None of us know if there's already been discussions over drinking levels and she's already expressed concern over his d*unk actions.
But, I'm not relationship material and have learned that I'm worthless and voiceless until there's a big dilemma that needs major action to save myself. By that time I'd probably be relieved if the relationship broke down, coz I'd have worn myself out trying to "save" the other person.
i think some crap people might have made you feel like that , but it doesn’t mean you have learned something that is true "
Ahhh, but what is true is people ain't too fond of taking responsibility for their own actions and try to make excuses instead of looking in the mirror. And it seems that these are the kinds my heart opens up to  hence it being locked away forever more. I was the same, I would make every excuse to try to make things work, to try and change me, when really I should have been loving myself enough to stop sacrificing.
But, me and one of my mates quite often pranked each other, so really does depend on their relationship. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
we all have flaws and different areas of strength and weakness in relationships though and that really doesn’t make you worthless which was the part i mean some crap people might have made you believe but it doesn’t therefore transfer to truth
and we can all have been crap at one relationship, hell even 10 or all of them so far but there is still the potential for that match where your strengths compensate and balance their weakness and vice versa , and you come together better as a whole
we might never be lucky enough to find that ying to our yang but i hope we do and even if we don’t it wont be a reflection on our worth
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I stand by the fact that if a man was obviously d*unk and asked me to marry him I would say no, and ask him to ask me again when sober.
I would not take advantage of his d*unken state to say “yes! He asked me to marry him and that’s it, he said it, we are doing it”.
I would wait until the morning and say “oi beer breath, you asked me to marry you last night! Did you mean it?” And he could either say “like fuck did I!!!” or “yes my sweet, make me the happiest man alive and be my wife”. Then I’d be on the phone telling everyone.
We say women are not to be taken advantage of when d*unk, surely this applies to men too?
Obviously the full facts of this post are not known, but I think both are to blame. Both are adults. Both should be able to communicate with each other openly and honestly about what was said and meant.
And personally, if someone asks me to marry them I want them to do it sober and with romance. And so I stick by my original post.
"
We only have one side of the story second hand so we have no idea actually what happened and he wasn't so d*unk that he remembered that he had proposed in the first place.
I just dont like the blame culture that somehow just because somebody claims to be so d*unk they didn't know what they were doing but its the other partys fault for believing it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"He's going ahead with it... The engagement...
He has asked me to keep it quiet... About disclosing... That he didn't mean to propose... Oooooooppps...
She has chosen the ring online
What can I say to him now... Nothing. He hasn't listened.
Hopefully it works out that's all I said. "
I think he knew exactly what he was doing but seems like he wanted a drama. |
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"Our son and his friend posted their trousers to Argentina when they were d*unk. That was really daft but they could always buy another pair
Did they post them to anyone in particular or just randomly Argentina? "
Just randomly. They thought it was hilarious at the time |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
I hope they'll be very happy together for a long time.
If that's not possible, that they reach an amicable end with mutual respect.
Just because some calls and says they mistakenly proposed inebriated doesn't necessarily mean they didn't know what they were doing. Testing out something scary with someone else isn't unusual. Even then, he was saying he would have to go through with it.
We don't know how inebriated she was too. She felt excited and confident enough in the proposal that she told others about it.
We don't know whether they had been talking around this for a while.
We don't know. But we love to speculate. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"He's going ahead with it... The engagement...
He has asked me to keep it quiet... About disclosing... That he didn't mean to propose... Oooooooppps...
She has chosen the ring online
What can I say to him now... Nothing. He hasn't listened.
Hopefully it works out that's all I said. "
Man down. Poor bugger clearly he needs urgent medical help.
Shame |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I stand by the fact that if a man was obviously d*unk and asked me to marry him I would say no, and ask him to ask me again when sober.
I would not take advantage of his d*unken state to say “yes! He asked me to marry him and that’s it, he said it, we are doing it”.
I would wait until the morning and say “oi beer breath, you asked me to marry you last night! Did you mean it?” And he could either say “like fuck did I!!!” or “yes my sweet, make me the happiest man alive and be my wife”. Then I’d be on the phone telling everyone.
We say women are not to be taken advantage of when d*unk, surely this applies to men too?
Obviously the full facts of this post are not known, but I think both are to blame. Both are adults. Both should be able to communicate with each other openly and honestly about what was said and meant.
And personally, if someone asks me to marry them I want them to do it sober and with romance. And so I stick by my original post.
We only have one side of the story second hand so we have no idea actually what happened and he wasn't so d*unk that he remembered that he had proposed in the first place.
I just dont like the blame culture that somehow just because somebody claims to be so d*unk they didn't know what they were doing but its the other partys fault for believing it. "
So the very pissed up woman who slurs "umm yeeah?" to a shag...
Not the bloke's fault for shagging her anyway. |
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"I stand by the fact that if a man was obviously d*unk and asked me to marry him I would say no, and ask him to ask me again when sober.
I would not take advantage of his d*unken state to say “yes! He asked me to marry him and that’s it, he said it, we are doing it”.
I would wait until the morning and say “oi beer breath, you asked me to marry you last night! Did you mean it?” And he could either say “like fuck did I!!!” or “yes my sweet, make me the happiest man alive and be my wife”. Then I’d be on the phone telling everyone.
We say women are not to be taken advantage of when d*unk, surely this applies to men too?
Obviously the full facts of this post are not known, but I think both are to blame. Both are adults. Both should be able to communicate with each other openly and honestly about what was said and meant.
And personally, if someone asks me to marry them I want them to do it sober and with romance. And so I stick by my original post.
We only have one side of the story second hand so we have no idea actually what happened and he wasn't so d*unk that he remembered that he had proposed in the first place.
I just dont like the blame culture that somehow just because somebody claims to be so d*unk they didn't know what they were doing but its the other partys fault for believing it. "
No blame culture. Like you said, we don’t know all the facts but we do know that she announced it to the world before confirming. Would you have done that ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I stand by the fact that if a man was obviously d*unk and asked me to marry him I would say no, and ask him to ask me again when sober.
I would not take advantage of his d*unken state to say “yes! He asked me to marry him and that’s it, he said it, we are doing it”.
I would wait until the morning and say “oi beer breath, you asked me to marry you last night! Did you mean it?” And he could either say “like fuck did I!!!” or “yes my sweet, make me the happiest man alive and be my wife”. Then I’d be on the phone telling everyone.
We say women are not to be taken advantage of when d*unk, surely this applies to men too?
Obviously the full facts of this post are not known, but I think both are to blame. Both are adults. Both should be able to communicate with each other openly and honestly about what was said and meant.
And personally, if someone asks me to marry them I want them to do it sober and with romance. And so I stick by my original post.
We only have one side of the story second hand so we have no idea actually what happened and he wasn't so d*unk that he remembered that he had proposed in the first place.
I just dont like the blame culture that somehow just because somebody claims to be so d*unk they didn't know what they were doing but its the other partys fault for believing it.
No blame culture. Like you said, we don’t know all the facts but we do know that she announced it to the world before confirming. Would you have done that ?"
We don't know that at all. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I stand by the fact that if a man was obviously d*unk and asked me to marry him I would say no, and ask him to ask me again when sober.
I would not take advantage of his d*unken state to say “yes! He asked me to marry him and that’s it, he said it, we are doing it”.
I would wait until the morning and say “oi beer breath, you asked me to marry you last night! Did you mean it?” And he could either say “like fuck did I!!!” or “yes my sweet, make me the happiest man alive and be my wife”. Then I’d be on the phone telling everyone.
We say women are not to be taken advantage of when d*unk, surely this applies to men too?
Obviously the full facts of this post are not known, but I think both are to blame. Both are adults. Both should be able to communicate with each other openly and honestly about what was said and meant.
And personally, if someone asks me to marry them I want them to do it sober and with romance. And so I stick by my original post.
We only have one side of the story second hand so we have no idea actually what happened and he wasn't so d*unk that he remembered that he had proposed in the first place.
I just dont like the blame culture that somehow just because somebody claims to be so d*unk they didn't know what they were doing but its the other partys fault for believing it.
So the very pissed up woman who slurs "umm yeeah?" to a shag...
Not the bloke's fault for shagging her anyway. "
Thats totally different.
Like i said he was d*unk enough to not know what he was doing apparently but not d*unk enough to remember it in the morning. |
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"I stand by the fact that if a man was obviously d*unk and asked me to marry him I would say no, and ask him to ask me again when sober.
I would not take advantage of his d*unken state to say “yes! He asked me to marry him and that’s it, he said it, we are doing it”.
I would wait until the morning and say “oi beer breath, you asked me to marry you last night! Did you mean it?” And he could either say “like fuck did I!!!” or “yes my sweet, make me the happiest man alive and be my wife”. Then I’d be on the phone telling everyone.
We say women are not to be taken advantage of when d*unk, surely this applies to men too?
Obviously the full facts of this post are not known, but I think both are to blame. Both are adults. Both should be able to communicate with each other openly and honestly about what was said and meant.
And personally, if someone asks me to marry them I want them to do it sober and with romance. And so I stick by my original post.
We only have one side of the story second hand so we have no idea actually what happened and he wasn't so d*unk that he remembered that he had proposed in the first place.
I just dont like the blame culture that somehow just because somebody claims to be so d*unk they didn't know what they were doing but its the other partys fault for believing it.
No blame culture. Like you said, we don’t know all the facts but we do know that she announced it to the world before confirming. Would you have done that ?
We don't know that at all."
We do according to the original posters comments. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I stand by the fact that if a man was obviously d*unk and asked me to marry him I would say no, and ask him to ask me again when sober.
I would not take advantage of his d*unken state to say “yes! He asked me to marry him and that’s it, he said it, we are doing it”.
I would wait until the morning and say “oi beer breath, you asked me to marry you last night! Did you mean it?” And he could either say “like fuck did I!!!” or “yes my sweet, make me the happiest man alive and be my wife”. Then I’d be on the phone telling everyone.
We say women are not to be taken advantage of when d*unk, surely this applies to men too?
Obviously the full facts of this post are not known, but I think both are to blame. Both are adults. Both should be able to communicate with each other openly and honestly about what was said and meant.
And personally, if someone asks me to marry them I want them to do it sober and with romance. And so I stick by my original post.
We only have one side of the story second hand so we have no idea actually what happened and he wasn't so d*unk that he remembered that he had proposed in the first place.
I just dont like the blame culture that somehow just because somebody claims to be so d*unk they didn't know what they were doing but its the other partys fault for believing it.
No blame culture. Like you said, we don’t know all the facts but we do know that she announced it to the world before confirming. Would you have done that ?
We don't know that at all.
We do according to the original posters comments."
It mentions nothing about having a conversation regarding telling people. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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^^^^^^^ The couple I am referring to are barely together a year. Both from different nationalities and race... Not that that matters. She has been quite the drama queen also on a few occasions... A jealous streak... You'd also never put the 2 of them together
Anyway... Nothing was discussed about telling people of said accidental alcohol induced `engagement`. He `proposed` Friday night while both were highly intoxicated.
When he got up for work Saturday morning...She was still asleep...About 11am he started to receive congratulatory mail from mutual friends
He called me for advice as we are very close platonic friends for quite a few years. Isn't that what friends are for... I advised him get out now if you never had any intention of marrying her.
Anyway he didn't heed my advice and has been in a daze since and has decided it's easier to get engaged at this stage than tell her he didn't mean it... 
I'm coming to the conclusion the guy is actually afraid of her at this stage... And also I think she's quite dim to accept this fake `proposal`... When he was in a d*unken state.
Another thing... I've been in their company quite a few times and you could tell she was more into him than him into her...
So that's the conclusion... Sad Eh...  |
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"^^^^^^^ The couple I am referring to are barely together a year. Both from different nationalities and race... Not that that matters. She has been quite the drama queen also on a few occasions... A jealous streak... You'd also never put the 2 of them together
Anyway... Nothing was discussed about telling people of said accidental alcohol induced `engagement`. He `proposed` Friday night while both were highly intoxicated.
When he got up for work Saturday morning...She was still asleep...About 11am he started to receive congratulatory mail from mutual friends
He called me for advice as we are very close platonic friends for quite a few years. Isn't that what friends are for... I advised him get out now if you never had any intention of marrying her.
Anyway he didn't heed my advice and has been in a daze since and has decided it's easier to get engaged at this stage than tell her he didn't mean it...
I'm coming to the conclusion the guy is actually afraid of her at this stage... And also I think she's quite dim to accept this fake `proposal`... When he was in a d*unken state.
Another thing... I've been in their company quite a few times and you could tell she was more into him than him into her...
So that's the conclusion... Sad Eh... "
God how awful. How old are they? |
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"His poor gf and why is he mailing you instead of sitting down like a grown man and talking to her about it. He sounds like an immature coward. Why let her tell others.
If he is happy for her to be devastated if she knew the truth or that he only married her because he felt he had to go through with it, then she would be better off without him.
To be honest if I did something equally as ridiculous, I'd be asking my friends for advice. It's what friends are for is it not?
"
was gonna say the same, especially since it is typically women who are more open bout issues and talk with mates about them, usually before partner too.
granted he either needs to fess up that he didn't mean it and take what ever consequences comes to him, he might be able to make up for them.
really doesn't sound like he wants to stick with being engaged, why I don't know only he does and he needs to keep asking himself why until he gets to an answer. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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^^^^^^^ She's 27, He's 35. I did ask had anyone else done something so idiotic under the influence and one guy in this thread admitted he had. I'll find his comment now. |
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"^^^^^^^ She's 27, He's 35. I did ask had anyone else done something so idiotic under the influence and one guy in this thread admitted he had. I'll find his comment now. "
Yeah, I saw it.
Well, what can any of us do. I've seen people marry when they really don't want to. My brother's one of them, we tried to tell him he didn't have to go through with it but he did. They're long since divorced |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Hi,
My Dear Good Male Friend has just mailed me in a very distraught state.
He got quite intoxicated last night and proposed to his GF not meaning to do so. She said yes and now he doesn't know how he's gonna get out of this nightmare situation...
I've advised him to tell her straight away he didn't mean it and to do so immediately. But the only thing is...she's told quite a few people already as he's received congratulatory msgs. Obviously there's no ring but his GF keeps mailing him pics of engagement rings at this moment.
He's just mailed me and said he thinks it's a case of he's made his bed. I'm trying to tell him cop on if it's a genuine stupid d*unken mistake and get out now.
Has this happened to anyone else ever. Or what's the most stupid ridiculous d*unken mistake you have ever done???
Oh this sounds sooooo familiar. I (Jason) was on e asked if I liked battlestar Galactica. Since I'm a sci fi nerd I said " marry me tomorrow" . Next I knew 3 months later the wedding was booked and arranged. I got caught up in the tidal wave I've her excitement and I hate hurting people. We got married 8 months after that throw away comment and divorced 2 years later. Was a huge mistake but we are still friends. Never should have been more than that.
So sit her down and apologize, but still buy her something nice and overpriced. Spoil her for as long as it takes to get her to forgive you. And if it's where you two end up then do it in an ott way to show you mean it this time. "
^^^^^^^ This ^^^^^^^
``Oh this sounds sooooo familiar. I (Jason) was on E & asked if I liked battlestar Galactica. Since I'm a sci fi nerd I said " marry me tomorrow" . Next I knew 3 months later the wedding was booked and arranged. I got caught up in the tidal wave of her excitement and I hate hurting people. We got married 8 months after that throw away comment and divorced 2 years later``
A very similar situation in above quote. Thanks Jason for sharing.
So has anyone else any similar experiences... Or been highly presurrised into marriage as in the `Ultimatum`. Male or Female??? It does happen and more often than people realise. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Maybe he should tell her that he was so d*unk he thought that he was talking to her sister ha ha. Tell him if he's not got the balls to tell her to fall out with her take the shitebags way out  |
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