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Overweight Single Mum
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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If you posted exactly what you were, would it would cut down you male/ mail, and mean you only met those actually interested in you!
My thought for the day.
White knights go polish your steed! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you posted exactly what you were, would it would cut down you male/ mail, and mean you only met those actually interested in you!
My thought for the day.
White knights go polish your steed!"
I think most of the single guys don’t read on here - just look at pics Lol.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"To me, by posting overweight single mum, you are highlighting the bit you feel uncomfortable about. Some people can then use your vulnerability to deceive you."
This is thoughtful. I might have another look at my profile through this lens. |
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"If you posted exactly what you were, would it would cut down you male/ mail, and mean you only met those actually interested in you!
My thought for the day.
White knights go polish your steed!"
I'm not sure I understand ... I'm not being facetious, lost in translation I think .
Is it like let's say I put on my profile :
"Lardy chain smoking old bat " and see if it affects the attention I get ?
 |
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"If you posted exactly what you were, would it would cut down you male/ mail, and mean you only met those actually interested in you!
My thought for the day.
White knights go polish your steed!"
Aspergic gentleman  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"On here , you're beautiful to most single males before you've even uploaded a picture. Does wonders for your self confidence doesn't it "
If I have 1 close up cleavage pic and no profile text I can get 200 messages in a day. |
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"I think it depends how you see yourself. "
That was my point. It is highlighting how you see yourself. Highlighting what you feel vulnerable about, gives some people the opportunity to exploit your insecurity. |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"So do I have to change my profile to a mid forties Grumpy sarcastic twat with a dad bob and embarrassing hair .
That way I'll get 1 message a day instead of 2 "
Yes. You do. Tis now law. |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
This is an interesting thought and it’s sparked a question;
Those people who write about being ‘brutally honest’, does that brutal honesty only apply to others or themselves as well and how is that reflected in what they write on their profiles or posts? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It would probably only make a slight bit of difference but I definitely wouldn't bother adding single mum/dad/parent ect
It goes without saying a lot of people are parents on here so I just think it opens certain people up to being targeted
Having said that I find it really difficult to look past profiles when they write statuses like
I'm skint, buy me a pass, someone go to the shop for me and if I read overweight single mum it looks a bit like you are putting yourself down.
I do think people should be more honest about their body size/shape though I'm fat so I have large on my profile but a lot do try and pull it off as curvy  I think that's the only place you need to mention size. If you're overweight just put large then others viewing your profile can make their own mind up based on that  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"To me, by posting overweight single mum, you are highlighting the bit you feel uncomfortable about. Some people can then use your vulnerability to deceive you."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I might go for a two word profile with a shadow avatar ..
" Have Vagina "
"
Planning on hiring a receptionist to get through the influx of messages afterwards? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So do I have to change my profile to a mid forties Grumpy sarcastic twat with a dad bob and embarrassing hair .
That way I'll get 1 message a day instead of 2 "
If you miss out the 'Grumpy' part then you might get 3 every 2 days !! |
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By *roop69Man
over a year ago
St Columb Major |
"If you posted exactly what you were, would it would cut down you male/ mail, and mean you only met those actually interested in you!
My thought for the day.
White knights go polish your steed!"
I’m married but on here for own reasons honesty don’t always help as I always mention I’m married and I don’t get far. But in your case you shouldn’t have to as from what your post states and your pics you seem to be a lovely person and that’s what counts. |
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"So do I have to change my profile to a mid forties Grumpy sarcastic twat with a dad bob and embarrassing hair .
That way I'll get 1 message a day instead of 2
If you miss out the 'Grumpy' part then you might get 3 every 2 days !!"
Yay  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I might go for a two word profile with a shadow avatar ..
" Have Vagina "
Do it as an experiment and see how many messages you get. "
I had a profile here years ago that had one word "Bollox"
It made no difference |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I might go for a two word profile with a shadow avatar ..
" Have Vagina "
Planning on hiring a receptionist to get through the influx of messages afterwards? "
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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago
East London |
"I might go for a two word profile with a shadow avatar ..
" Have Vagina "
Do it as an experiment and see how many messages you get.
I had a profile here years ago that had one word "Bollox"
It made no difference "
I've made my profile very inhospitable and I still get lots of messages. |
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Why Should you lower your own standards when there’s nothing wrong with you in the first place Your probably opening yourself up to more messages from less confident men like myself. I bet most men will agree with me we all love a mum tum plus it’s personality that more important than looks for me anyway |
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Brilliant question testes.......
There are so many plusses and hardly any negatives to this approach.
My knee jerk reaction is that it gives women the opportunity to take steps toward cutting down on all the mail they profess to not want...
Then I thought ..... well it won't cut down on the mail cos , supposedly, men don't read anything anyway, they look at the pictures it seems.
That took me to ...... well how about people stop taking pictures from such deliberately deceptive angles and letting others see what they are actually 'grappling' with.
Right now I am this stage..... You describe yourself as an overweight , single mum and assume that others will see this as a negative because you do (devil's advocate?)
Seems to me , in my final analysis, that all we need is an honest picture and a contact method. Because what we perceive ourselves to be is not what others see. In any case - most meets on here are not to form lifelong loves but to acquire a pleasing shag from a agreeable personality / body type.
What happens after that depends on factors other than ethereal projections.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I might go for a two word profile with a shadow avatar ..
" Have Vagina "
Do it as an experiment and see how many messages you get.
I had a profile here years ago that had one word "Bollox"
It made no difference
I've made my profile very inhospitable and I still get lots of messages. "
But you do have a vagina though |
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"I think it depends how you see yourself.
That was my point. It is highlighting how you see yourself. Highlighting what you feel vulnerable about, gives some people the opportunity to exploit your insecurity."
I agree and exploitation takes many forms |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My profile text is honest, but do feel my photos aren't really a true reflection of how I see myself, and don't want to share "honest photos", if that makes sense? The photos, are of course me, I'm just good at finding angles that hide the bits I hate, which is why you'll never see a full body shot  ..
I don't see it as being vulnerable, I don't do it to get pity messages from men to tell me I'm not the things I state, I do it so I'm being honest about myself and don't attract men who can't cope with more bounce to the ounce
I save my vulnerability for those I chat to on a deeper level, away from fab. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I am an over weight single mum and anyone looking at my profile can tell as much as I state I have kids and that I'm a size 14 and have flab and stretch marks and I don't think that it hurts my chances with anyone, if i changed my profile to fat single mum I would expect to attract less people, not because it changes how they see me but because it portrays that I am not comfortable and confident with myself and let's face it being confident in yourself is sexy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I love that description. But overweight is debatable.
Takes me ages to think of names for my profiles on any site, would be so much easier if I just put 'twat'!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I've made my profile very inhospitable and I still get lots of messages. "
That's probably because 99% of guys don't read profiles! I know they don't read mine they just look at pics. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Brilliant question testes.......
There are so many plusses and hardly any negatives to this approach.
My knee jerk reaction is that it gives women the opportunity to take steps toward cutting down on all the mail they profess to not want...
Then I thought ..... well it won't cut down on the mail cos , supposedly, men don't read anything anyway, they look at the pictures it seems.
That took me to ...... well how about people stop taking pictures from such deliberately deceptive angles and letting others see what they are actually 'grappling' with.
Right now I am this stage..... You describe yourself as an overweight , single mum and assume that others will see this as a negative because you do (devil's advocate?)
Seems to me , in my final analysis, that all we need is an honest picture and a contact method. Because what we perceive ourselves to be is not what others see. In any case - most meets on here are not to form lifelong loves but to acquire a pleasing shag from a agreeable personality / body type.
What happens after that depends on factors other than ethereal projections.
"
That's exactly why I move straight to a social ASAP after a first message.
Photos can be deceiving but also they don't show someone's cheeky smile or quirky sense of humour.
Profile text can't show me compatibility. Real life interaction does. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I am an over weight single mum and anyone looking at my profile can tell as much as I state I have kids and that I'm a size 14 and have flab and stretch marks and I don't think that it hurts my chances with anyone, if i changed my profile to fat single mum I would expect to attract less people, not because it changes how they see me but because it portrays that I am not comfortable and confident with myself and let's face it being confident in yourself is sexy "
I have been lucky to meet men who devoured my fatness with delight. They enjoyed being with me, honestly and genuinely. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Brilliant question testes.......
There are so many plusses and hardly any negatives to this approach.
My knee jerk reaction is that it gives women the opportunity to take steps toward cutting down on all the mail they profess to not want...
Then I thought ..... well it won't cut down on the mail cos , supposedly, men don't read anything anyway, they look at the pictures it seems.
That took me to ...... well how about people stop taking pictures from such deliberately deceptive angles and letting others see what they are actually 'grappling' with.
Right now I am this stage..... You describe yourself as an overweight , single mum and assume that others will see this as a negative because you do (devil's advocate?)
Seems to me , in my final analysis, that all we need is an honest picture and a contact method. Because what we perceive ourselves to be is not what others see. In any case - most meets on here are not to form lifelong loves but to acquire a pleasing shag from a agreeable personality / body type.
What happens after that depends on factors other than ethereal projections.
"
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I see nothing off putting about a single mum who's overweight.
Your weight doesn't define you.
Neither does the fact that you've reproduced.
Being single is quite desirable here.
I dunno about anyone else but we ARE honest about exactly what/who we are....and shock horror! People still like us.
Lu |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I might go for a two word profile with a shadow avatar ..
" Have Vagina "
"
Even without the two words I still get the occasional "you're hot/sexy/stunning (insert random compliment) message.
Clearly these men either don't care or just blanket sent to anyone nearby |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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The replies on this thread just show, how negatively many people think of women carrying extra weight.
And being a single mum, still has some stigma attached to it. I relish it, and its a factual description of how I identify.
Funny thing is, I dont view it as a negative.
I didn't put inflection there, you did, like I said, interesting, isnt it.
In fact, I will post a video, which clearly shows my body, and then there will be no misconceptions! Feel free not too look, or listen!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The replies on this thread just show, how negatively many people think of women carrying extra weight.
And being a single mum, still has some stigma attached to it. I relish it, and its a factual description of how I identify.
Funny thing is, I dont view it as a negative.
I didn't put inflection there, you did, like I said, interesting, isnt it.
In fact, I will post a video, which clearly shows my body, and then there will be no misconceptions! Feel free not too look, or listen! "
I'm so glad you posted this!
Your thread prompted mine
I think you're awesome!
Lu |
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By *imbobaMan
over a year ago
Glasgow |
"I find honesty a very attractive quality."
Also agree. Unless you’re here simply for an online ego boost what’s the point?
And belittling yourself is a characteristic that I’ve seen many here overcome with time and growing confidence which can only be a positive fringe benefit of the site as a whole.
Off to shine my steed. |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"The replies on this thread just show, how negatively many people think of women carrying extra weight.
And being a single mum, still has some stigma attached to it. I relish it, and its a factual description of how I identify.
Funny thing is, I dont view it as a negative.
I didn't put inflection there, you did, like I said, interesting, isnt it.
In fact, I will post a video, which clearly shows my body, and then there will be no misconceptions! Feel free not too look, or listen! "
I love the karaoke! And your knickers are gorgeous! As are you |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"The replies on this thread just show, how negatively many people think of women carrying extra weight.
And being a single mum, still has some stigma attached to it. I relish it, and its a factual description of how I identify.
Funny thing is, I dont view it as a negative.
I didn't put inflection there, you did, like I said, interesting, isnt it.
In fact, I will post a video, which clearly shows my body, and then there will be no misconceptions! Feel free not too look, or listen!
I'm so glad you posted this!
Your thread prompted mine
I think you're awesome!
Lu "
Thankyou gorgeous xx |
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"The replies on this thread just show, how negatively many people think of women carrying extra weight.
And being a single mum, still has some stigma attached to it. I relish it, and its a factual description of how I identify.
Funny thing is, I dont view it as a negative.
I didn't put inflection there, you did, like I said, interesting, isnt it.
In fact, I will post a video, which clearly shows my body, and then there will be no misconceptions! Feel free not too look, or listen! "
I did . Seriously Tess , awesome and the best thing on fab today |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I am a single dad and I know that puts some ladies off.
Yes on here we go by visuals at first but I find a body positive mindset to be a massive turn on. Far more than body shape itself. "
Exactly x |
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"To me, by posting overweight single mum, you are highlighting the bit you feel uncomfortable about. Some people can then use your vulnerability to deceive you."
I'm a lone parent too. I'm also fat, let's call it like it is. Anyone having a problem with it, well its just that, their problem xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"The replies on this thread just show, how negatively many people think of women carrying extra weight.
And being a single mum, still has some stigma attached to it. I relish it, and its a factual description of how I identify.
Funny thing is, I dont view it as a negative.
I didn't put inflection there, you did, like I said, interesting, isnt it.
In fact, I will post a video, which clearly shows my body, and then there will be no misconceptions! Feel free not too look, or listen!
I did . Seriously Tess , awesome and the best thing on fab today "
I agree. Go you! |
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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago
East London |
"The replies on this thread just show, how negatively many people think of women carrying extra weight.
And being a single mum, still has some stigma attached to it. I relish it, and its a factual description of how I identify.
Funny thing is, I dont view it as a negative.
I didn't put inflection there, you did, like I said, interesting, isnt it.
In fact, I will post a video, which clearly shows my body, and then there will be no misconceptions! Feel free not too look, or listen! "
That's made me laugh. I wish I had the energy to sing as I scrubbed my bathroom |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You can only control 2 things in your life
1 what you put in your body
2 what you think of yourself
Everything else is out of your control...so try not to worry over things you can't control |
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By *indergirlWoman
over a year ago
somewhere, someplace |
On here I think the single parent aspect puts more people off than the weight issue, I'm upfront about it and if that bothers someone then that's more on them than it is on me, it doesn't change who I am because I have kids |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Doesn't really enjoy wearing stockings or heels or getting dressed up, as unfit as I could possibly be, always cold and as clingy as an octopus round a jar of crabs once seed has been spilled. Faf?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"On here I think the single parent aspect puts more people off than the weight issue, I'm upfront about it and if that bothers someone then that's more on them than it is on me, it doesn't change who I am because I have kids "
On here?? Nothing would put a man off lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"On here I think the single parent aspect puts more people off than the weight issue, I'm upfront about it and if that bothers someone then that's more on them than it is on me, it doesn't change who I am because I have kids "
Maybe people on here just don't want to meet with someone where there's the potential for things to be complicated or difficult to arrange |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The problem with stating I'm fat is the men telling me I'm not, then me saying I really am, then them saying show me pics to prove it.
Why do I need to send naked pics to prove I'm fat?"
Isn't that just them using your 'vulnerability' to try and con you into sending naked pics though.
I don't bother with the conversation about fat etc. They meet me in person and if either of us aren't happy we don't meet again.
But I try not to ask questions as pretty much any answer from them will piss me off. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Doesn't really enjoy wearing stockings or heels or getting dressed up, as unfit as I could possibly be, always cold and as clingy as an octopus round a jar of crabs once seed has been spilled. Faf? "
Ok |
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By *indergirlWoman
over a year ago
somewhere, someplace |
"On here I think the single parent aspect puts more people off than the weight issue, I'm upfront about it and if that bothers someone then that's more on them than it is on me, it doesn't change who I am because I have kids
Maybe people on here just don't want to meet with someone where there's the potential for things to be complicated or difficult to arrange "
That's the thing though it's doesn't necessarily mean it will be complicated or difficult to arrange, for example myself I'm not looking for serious so there goes one complication and I have really good childcare so that solves the difficulty |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You are who you are and if someone is put off by parental status or your BMI then that just shows how shallow they are and how much they don’t deserve to spend any time with you naughty or otherwise!!!
The size of your personality matters more to me personally plus the fact that you film adds for cilit bang!!
T |
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By *lthomasMan
over a year ago
Wolverhampton |
"So do I have to change my profile to a mid forties Grumpy sarcastic twat with a dad bob and embarrassing hair .
That way I'll get 1 message a day instead of 2 "
could be worse, I’d have to change mine to Mid-fifties ..... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"You are who you are and if someone is put off by parental status or your BMI then that just shows how shallow they are and how much they don’t deserve to spend any time with you naughty or otherwise!!!
The size of your personality matters more to me personally plus the fact that you film adds for cilit bang!!
T"
Hey do you think I could get on the telly box thingy! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You are who you are and if someone is put off by parental status or your BMI then that just shows how shallow they are and how much they don’t deserve to spend any time with you naughty or otherwise!!!
The size of your personality matters more to me personally plus the fact that you film adds for cilit bang!!
T
Hey do you think I could get on the telly box thingy! "
Maybe on babestation or channel four after 12!!!!
T |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"You are who you are and if someone is put off by parental status or your BMI then that just shows how shallow they are and how much they don’t deserve to spend any time with you naughty or otherwise!!!
The size of your personality matters more to me personally plus the fact that you film adds for cilit bang!!
T
Hey do you think I could get on the telly box thingy!
Maybe on babestation or channel four after 12!!!!
T"
Babeststion Hahaha!! |
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By *attooCTMan
over a year ago
Glasgow /Swansea |
"If you posted exactly what you were, would it would cut down you male/ mail, and mean you only met those actually interested in you!
My thought for the day.
White knights go polish your steed!"
If someone is an over weight single mum who cares she might be happy in her ain skin n like no having a guy. Guys dont aw like thin lassies |
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Op I am what I am I know my limitations and often aim too high but if you don't like what u see then fuck u is my attitude life's too short to worry someone will like who you are it may be a smaller circle but u got to try to fail if that makes sense lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Op your a lovely looking woman so why let someone put you down be confident in yourself and sod the haters"
She didn't say she wasn't lovely looking....  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"If you posted exactly what you were, would it would cut down you male/ mail, and mean you only met those actually interested in you!
My thought for the day.
White knights go polish your steed!"
Probably make me look more tbh, but I love size 16 plus women with a bit of extra padding. |
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