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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Do you look at them? Does it affect whether you will message someone? If they have something listed that you’re really not into would it stop you messaging?
Just doing some Sydney uni research again  |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
"Do you look at them? Does it affect whether you will message someone? If they have something listed that you’re really not into would it stop you messaging?
Just doing some Sydney uni research again "
I'd never message someone that didn't have any listed  
Joking aside, the only time I really look at them is when someone posts a thread looking for a specific thing (usually BDSM related and usually a bloke) and see they don't have that particular thing listed yet are asking why they can't find it.
I prefer to find out people's interests by talking to them, and them coming out naturally as part of that discussion, than seeing a list of interests as some kind of tick box of either what I am looking for, or worse still can expect if I were to meet that person. |
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It’s not a part I’ve paid much attention to as normally it’s a long list, one thing wouldn’t put me off unless it was the only thing they talked about and not something I’d be willing to do, so just a case of not compatible |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Do you look at them? Does it affect whether you will message someone? If they have something listed that you’re really not into would it stop you messaging?
Just doing some Sydney uni research again
I'd never message someone that didn't have any listed
Joking aside, the only time I really look at them is when someone posts a thread looking for a specific thing (usually BDSM related and usually a bloke) and see they don't have that particular thing listed yet are asking why they can't find it.
I prefer to find out people's interests by talking to them, and them coming out naturally as part of that discussion, than seeing a list of interests as some kind of tick box of either what I am looking for, or worse still can expect if I were to meet that person."
Haha. Yes I know. I don’t have any listed! Had to google half of them when I first joined to see what they were  
I don’t think I really look at them initially to be honest and I’m quite thorough with my scrutinising of profiles! . I may look at them if I’ve been chatting a while. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It can be a problem when people assume that your interest list is a to-do list."
Exactly. I prefer to speak to people and find out that way. Besides, there’s things I’d do with some people but not others. |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
I can’t say that I’ve ever looked really!
I think that it’s a bit like any interests, they might be a way of sparking discussion but ultimately you may not end up doing that thing with them.
Ive met lots of people who are into music but rarely listen to music with them or share a favourite author but rarely discuss their works. Just because someone is into DP, watersports or BDSM, it doesn’t mean that we will be doing that |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don’t read profiles unless we’ve been talking for a while. *Just my opinion.
I am amazed at how much people read and take things in through text on a bio. 
I could literally put anything & everything and you still wouldn’t know me unless we talked more. (So I assume the same)
I chose to message people I like listening to in the forums. I find what there interests are after that, because a lot of people are afraid to be upfront to strangers. 
Interests also change with my mood, and some are not listed at all  |
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The only one I look for is TV/TS in their looking for section unless I've spoken to them via the forum.
If they don't have that listed then I'm never going to take the chance messaging them from their profile alone. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Yes we do. It's surprising how many people contact us and have none of the same interests though. "
Yes I think maybe it is something a lot don’t read. I always fully read profiles but often forget about that bit. |
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"I find it interesting when they don't list SM, but imply they like activities? "
I enjoy these activities as you know. But when I had it up as an interest. The messages I got were toe curling. So I got rid and find people on my own accord now. |
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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
"Do you look at them? Does it affect whether you will message someone? If they have something listed that you’re really not into would it stop you messaging?
Just doing some Sydney uni research again "
To a degree.
If they don’t list or have any images showing some form of BDSM play then it is unlikely they would want to meet us or if they did they would have as fun a time as they could have with someone else.
However that assumes the message is about meeting up and not about striking up a conversation. |
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"Yes we do. It's surprising how many people contact us and have none of the same interests though.
Yes I think maybe it is something a lot don’t read. I always fully read profiles but often forget about that bit. "
It's one of the first things we check. So many people actually have phrases on their profile that mean they wouldn't want to meet us but contact us. What you say explains that |
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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
Its also interesting where not only do your interests not match but where their profile states in all caps “no beards/facial hair” or “must have hair on head” and they still wink or message you when your images clearly show you don’t meet that criteria. |
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"Do you look at them? Does it affect whether you will message someone? If they have something listed that you’re really not into would it stop you messaging?
Just doing some Sydney uni research again
To a degree.
If they don’t list or have any images showing some form of BDSM play then it is unlikely they would want to meet us or if they did they would have as fun a time as they could have with someone else.
However that assumes the message is about meeting up and not about striking up a conversation."
When you point that out do they then say it's something they've always been interested in and really want to try? We quite often do and wonder why it it's such a keen interest, they've only thought to mention it in the third message |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I tend to skip them and of the profile text/ pictures are to my liking then i will have a glance at them. A long as we have a few in common them in happy with that. I know not everyone will like everything I like and I'm happy to adapt and go with the flow |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I find it interesting when they don't list SM, but imply they like activities?
I enjoy these activities as you know. But when I had it up as an interest. The messages I got were toe curling. So I got rid and find people on my own accord now. "
Oh really... I think my 'yes Daddy' photo sends people into melt down and they don't even read my profile lol, so i get lots of non-kinky folk mailing me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Its also interesting where not only do your interests not match but where their profile states in all caps “no beards/facial hair” or “must have hair on head” and they still wink or message you when your images clearly show you don’t meet that criteria. "
Maybe thats one of their kinks... Persuading you to shave it off  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
To a degree.
If they don’t list or have any images showing some form of BDSM play then it is unlikely they would want to meet us or if they did they would have as fun a time as they could have with someone else.
However that assumes the message is about meeting up and not about striking up a conversation."
Oh i like that bottom distinction ... I would be much more relaxed if i knew it was connecting vs 'when' are we meeting |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Do you look at them? Does it affect whether you will message someone? If they have something listed that you’re really not into would it stop you messaging?
Just doing some Sydney uni research again "
Yep always look at them to see if they list SM, if they don't no point in messaging really as I'd likely be wasting their time and mine! |
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"I find it interesting when they don't list SM, but imply they like activities?
I enjoy these activities as you know. But when I had it up as an interest. The messages I got were toe curling. So I got rid and find people on my own accord now.
Oh really... I think my 'yes Daddy' photo sends people into melt down and they don't even read my profile lol, so i get lots of non-kinky folk mailing me "
Haha oh dear think I may have messaged you on the back of a DD/lg thread. I'm definitely not kinky  |
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"I find it interesting when they don't list SM, but imply they like activities?
I enjoy these activities as you know. But when I had it up as an interest. The messages I got were toe curling. So I got rid and find people on my own accord now.
Oh really... I think my 'yes Daddy' photo sends people into melt down and they don't even read my profile lol, so i get lots of non-kinky folk mailing me
Haha oh dear think I may have messaged you on the back of a DD/lg thread. I'm definitely not kinky "
And I definitely don't wear women's clothes |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I take a look at their interests, but so many people just tick everything, and when you talk to them they're not keen on half of it. It's so hard to tell if the selected interests reflect their actual interests. |
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"I find it interesting when they don't list SM, but imply they like activities?
I enjoy these activities as you know. But when I had it up as an interest. The messages I got were toe curling. So I got rid and find people on my own accord now.
Oh really... I think my 'yes Daddy' photo sends people into melt down and they don't even read my profile lol, so i get lots of non-kinky folk mailing me
Haha oh dear think I may have messaged you on the back of a DD/lg thread. I'm definitely not kinky
And I definitely don't wear women's clothes "
Damn it I've been completely busted |
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Yes it could put me off in certain circumstances e.g. The ones that have ticked everything on the list and the ones that have ticked a preference that i'd never do...... I wouldn't want to disappoint them.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yeah, as we're not into soft swap so if same room swapping isn't on interests we pass by them.
But wouldn't be put off if they had something we didn't do on there for example - anal, as were not into that, but that doesn't mean they specifically want to do it with us per say or on every meet.
Her x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Do you look at them? Does it affect whether you will message someone? If they have something listed that you’re really not into would it stop you messaging?
Just doing some Sydney uni research again "
yes it does stop us |
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but a few men think it means male toys for themselves to use. 