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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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TLDR: Thank you, much love. I’m off and maybe I’ll see you again on the other side of the matrix  Doc x
The time has come to shed the snake skin that has been Shaman and Doc for the last 20 years. No more dodgy snake oil will be purveyed here after this, as it is my time to see if I can discover what is real and what is not. My journey into my.darkest desires has driven a lot of my behaviour over that time, so much so, that at times that I became ensnared by those desires and consumed by my own shadowy illusion. During that time I have also glimpsed some of the very best of me, the worst of me and most things in between. However without those realisations and forgiving myself and accepting myself warts and all, I wouldn’t be where I am right now.
I am deeply grateful to each of you, that has connected with me during this journey, as I have felt love from so many of you I am deeply sorry for any times my words or actions have hurt or impacted you in a negative way, no matter what that might have been. I have stumbled and fallen often. But know this. you have all impacted me through your presence in one way or another and I want to thank you all.
Forgive each other and yourself on a daily basis and find things to be grateful for every day, In the last few weeks, while my Mum has been very ill and as a family we have been preparing for her to pass on, I realised it only needed a shove to experience and to see, I’m already free. I have seen much beauty on this site in the people I have got to know or just observed from afar regardless of gender, colour, creed, sexuality. Most of all that beauty has shone from deep within each individual. I have also been blessed to hear mulch truth as you have spoken your truths. I have also seen such deep goodness and unconditional love for each other. I have also seen how the amplification of our differences here and in the world has created so much suffering and pain, and the polarisation of perspectives has created a world divided and fragmented, on the edge of collapse. Of course we were only reminded of it again, seeing the scenes in Clapham, last night. Once again I felt a deep sadness for where we are.
However despite all our differences, and what at times can seem hopeless we can find love in a hopeless place and see the seeds in this great release for a new era of transformation. As a good friend described the other night to me, as I told her I was leaving the site, see saw we are all droplets of the Divine. In my recent moments of clarity I have understood that we are all already free, but it only becomes a reality as each of us realises it too. Love is boundless and an infinite source of it is always already available to us all, if we awake to this present moment, the eternal now. We can then breathe in Spirit accepting its gift and rest in the empty silence of the boundless, peaceful sea of bliss in which, despite our separate droplet nature , WE ARE ALL ONE.. And then breathe out and let go of the pain and suffering of our illusory separateness.
You’ll be forgiven for thinking this is more of my dodgy snake oil and complete and utter bullshit, and wonder what I’ve been smoking But what if there is more than just a grain of truth in it?
To quote the late Doctor on the Drums, Neil Pearl, of my favourite band Rush, as he plagiarised Shakespeare: “All the World’s indeed a stage, and we are merely players. Each another’s audience outside our gilded cage.” Freed of our gilded cage we can play and frolic and laugh at the great Cosmic joke and become all we can be.
For me there is so much to do in this life and so little time left, that my energy and focus is now outside this site.
I wish you much love and joy in your lives and while there will always be suffering and pain, that may at times feel unbearable, I pray that you find that radical freedom that enables you to discover what your heart desires most and to be all you can be.
As my life motto has said for years and my profile header pointed to with the usual profane joke
Live, love, laugh, learn, leave a legacy.
Until we meet again here lies YeOldeWitchDoc RIP. |
..you’ve made me cry Doc...Take care you lovely human being
