FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Coffee and cock, or cake and c**t?

Coffee and cock, or cake and c**t?

By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

I was having a chat with a friend, and when he asked me to move in with him, I said I'd bring the cake and c**t (I know... my language was atrocious but I liked the alliteration) and he could bring the coffee and cock.... we would both be providing the other's favourite things.

If a forumite asked you to move in with them, what would be the two things you'd have that you know they'd love?

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By *dam1971Man over a year ago

Bedford

Cake and cunt is good, preferably with buttercream icing

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By *riar BelisseWoman over a year ago

Delightful Bliss

Only for fun as I like living on my own

Mine would be my oils and hands

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By *ntrigued32Couple over a year ago

Nottingham

Cock and pussy!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

A soft comfortable chair to rock in when all else fails.

Set of fake IDs when you have to escape;-)

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Cake and cunt is good, preferably with buttercream icing

You're bring cake and cunt? Er. Is there something you've not told me?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Cock and cuffs

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Only for fun as I like living on my own

Mine would be my oils and hands"

This is definitely just for fun....

And ooh, nice

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Cock and pussy!

D."

You're the perfect pair to move in with

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"A soft comfortable chair to rock in when all else fails.

Set of fake IDs when you have to escape;-) "

I LOVE the way you're thinking.....

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Cock and cuffs "

Oooh this is very good.....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Is tea an option anywhere in this, I think tea should b an option, missus isn’t interested unless there is tea

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Is tea an option anywhere in this, I think tea should b an option, missus isn’t interested unless there is tea

Anything is an option.... you decide what you bring to the new living arrangements.

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By *ilverjagMan over a year ago

swansea

I would tell them that I'd just been watching an old 1944 film called, Fanny by gaslight. Now I could sit and watch cunt by candlelight.

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By *dam1971Man over a year ago

Bedford

"Cake and cunt is good, preferably with buttercream icing

You're bring cake and cunt? Er. Is there something you've not told me?"

Oops, I thought that’s what I’d like someone to bring.

I would gift someone with an easygoing charm and rapier-like wit. But not in the morning when I’m apparently a dopey fucker

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By *eorge JetsonMan over a year ago

Middlesbrough

"Is tea an option anywhere in this, I think tea should b an option, missus isn’t interested unless there is tea

Tits and Tea is your 2 items there then.

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By *eorge JetsonMan over a year ago

Middlesbrough

Posh... WTF have you started here at this time of the morning??

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Is tea an option anywhere in this, I think tea should b an option, missus isn’t interested unless there is tea

Tits and Tea is your 2 items there then.

Tits and tea it is!!!

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I would tell them that I'd just been watching an old 1944 film called, Fanny by gaslight. Now I could sit and watch cunt by candlelight. "

Cleverly done.... but what are you bringing? Candles and....

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Cake and cunt is good, preferably with buttercream icing

You're bring cake and cunt? Er. Is there something you've not told me?

Oops, I thought that’s what I’d like someone to bring.

I would gift someone with an easygoing charm and rapier-like wit. But not in the morning when I’m apparently a dopey fucker

And your amazing watercolour penis. Obvs.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Posh... WTF have you started here at this time of the morning??

Yeah. My fault. Entirely. There was absolutely no assistance or encouragement from anyone else

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By *isAdventure69Woman over a year ago

Hampshire

I’ll want them to provide soft kissable lips and a cock , I’ll bring bottomless food and a willing body

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Is tea an option anywhere in this, I think tea should b an option, missus isn’t interested unless there is tea

Tits and Tea is your 2 items there then.

Tits and tea it is!!! "

Woo hoo!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Any chance I can bring bovil and bollox

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By *oiluvfunMan over a year ago

Penrith

My innocent look, and my filthy mind

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I’ll want them to provide soft kissable lips and a cock , I’ll bring bottomless food and a willing body

Oooh that sounds perfect....

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Any chance I can bring bovil and bollox

Absolutely can!

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"My innocent look, and my filthy mind

Innocent my mahoosive arse!

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By *eorge JetsonMan over a year ago

Middlesbrough

"Posh... WTF have you started here at this time of the morning??

Yeah. My fault. Entirely. There was absolutely no assistance or encouragement from anyone else

There never usually needs to be.

Your fully qualified to get yourself into trouble on these forums all by yourself

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By *oiluvfunMan over a year ago

Penrith

"I’ll want them to provide soft kissable lips and a cock , I’ll bring bottomless food and a willing body

Sold!

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By *rder66Man over a year ago

Tatooine

I very small bag so I wouldn't have to carry much when I esacped.

Relationship is one thing I'm not sure I would want to live with someone again.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Any chance I can bring bovil and bollox

Absolutely can!"

That’s it, we’re ready to leave bringing tits and tea, and bovril and bollox,

Oh shit where’s my mask

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By *hortarseWoman over a year ago

Norfolk

Bitch with cold hands and feet

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By *oiluvfunMan over a year ago

Penrith

"My innocent look, and my filthy mind

Innocent my mahoosive arse!"

I kid you not, I’ve been told several times I look like butter wouldn’t melt

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Posh... WTF have you started here at this time of the morning??

Yeah. My fault. Entirely. There was absolutely no assistance or encouragement from anyone else

There never usually needs to be.

Your fully qualified to get yourself into trouble on these forums all by yourself

There might not need to be, but that doesn't mean that in certain instances there isn't a partner in crime

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By *moothdickMan over a year ago

stoke

Tea and tongue

Mouth and munchies

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I very small bag so I wouldn't have to carry much when I esacped.

Relationship is one thing I'm not sure I would want to live with someone again."

Bring that tie and your bag and move in with me. For the night.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

A jar of marmite and ear plugs

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Any chance I can bring bovil and bollox

Absolutely can!

That’s it, we’re ready to leave bringing tits and tea, and bovril and bollox,

Oh shit where’s my mask

PPE is extra and required!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Well I bake cakes drink loads of coffee and I love me some pussy so u decide

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Bitch with cold hands and feet

Ideal.... I get too hot

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"My innocent look, and my filthy mind

Innocent my mahoosive arse!

I kid you not, I’ve been told several times I look like butter wouldn’t melt

Yes, but people will believe anything..... there are still some people on here that believe I'm NOT innocent. Weirdos.

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By *eorge JetsonMan over a year ago

Middlesbrough

"Posh... WTF have you started here at this time of the morning??

Yeah. My fault. Entirely. There was absolutely no assistance or encouragement from anyone else

There never usually needs to be.

Your fully qualified to get yourself into trouble on these forums all by yourself

There might not need to be, but that doesn't mean that in certain instances there isn't a partner in crime

Your a vigilant with a vajayjay, you work alone!!

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Tea and tongue

Mouth and munchies "

Amazing alliteration and intriguing ideas....

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By *irtydevil666Man over a year ago

bristol

Hoover and soap to wash that potty mouth out

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"A jar of marmite and ear plugs

Come hither Doriss....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 06/03/21 09:20:51]

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Well I bake cakes drink loads of coffee and I love me some pussy so u decide"

That's not the idea..... you say what you'll bring!

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By *heVonMatterhornsCouple over a year ago

Lincoln

Cats and cuddles

LvM

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Posh... WTF have you started here at this time of the morning??

Yeah. My fault. Entirely. There was absolutely no assistance or encouragement from anyone else

There never usually needs to be.

Your fully qualified to get yourself into trouble on these forums all by yourself

There might not need to be, but that doesn't mean that in certain instances there isn't a partner in crime

Your a vigilant with a vajayjay, you work alone!!

I often bring a friend!

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By *hortarseWoman over a year ago

Norfolk

"Bitch with cold hands and feet

Ideal.... I get too hot"

I'll keep nice cool as long as you don't mind me been a bitch

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Hoover and soap to wash that potty mouth out

Can't be mine you're meaning

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Whiskey and wisdom from me

The perfect pairing

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By *irtydevil666Man over a year ago

bristol

"Hoover and soap to wash that potty mouth out

Can't be mine you're meaning

Yes using that word so early in the day

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Cats and cuddles

LvM "

I suppose K can bring you with her then

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Bitch with cold hands and feet

Ideal.... I get too hot

I'll keep nice cool as long as you don't mind me been a bitch "

Absolutely no problem here!

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Hoover and soap to wash that potty mouth out

Can't be mine you're meaning

Yes using that word so early in the day

To be fair... you're right. Come do my mouth then

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Any chance I can bring bovil and bollox

Absolutely can!

That’s it, we’re ready to leave bringing tits and tea, and bovril and bollox,

Oh shit where’s my mask

PPE is extra and required!"

And we’re still doing social distancing right?

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By *irtydevil666Man over a year ago

bristol

"Hoover and soap to wash that potty mouth out

Can't be mine you're meaning

Yes using that word so early in the day

To be fair... you're right. Come do my mouth then"

Gladly open wide

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Any chance I can bring bovil and bollox

Absolutely can!

That’s it, we’re ready to leave bringing tits and tea, and bovril and bollox,

Oh shit where’s my mask

PPE is extra and required!

And we’re still doing social distancing right? "

Exactly. Because the plague knows that it's got until June 21st to run rampant. After that it'll stop. Obvs

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Hoover and soap to wash that potty mouth out

Can't be mine you're meaning

Yes using that word so early in the day

To be fair... you're right. Come do my mouth then

Gladly open wide

Pervert

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By *irtydevil666Man over a year ago

bristol

"Hoover and soap to wash that potty mouth out

Can't be mine you're meaning

Yes using that word so early in the day

To be fair... you're right. Come do my mouth then

Gladly open wide

Pervert

Yea and proud

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

My hairy chest and my tongue

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"My hairy chest and my tongue

A fine combination there!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Coffee and cake? I remember when Burger King did a coffee and donut for £2 when I was at college. This was where I spent most of my days...

*anyone else just sang the next line there ^

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By *orthern StarsCouple over a year ago

Durham

If my husband moved in with someone it would be his sense of humour. He literally laughed me into his bed.

His cock also of course.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Coffee and cake? I remember when Burger King did a coffee and donut for £2 when I was at college. This was where I spent most of my days...

*anyone else just sang the next line there ^

Damn you for the earworm! Damn you!

Bring coffee and donuts....

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"If my husband moved in with someone it would be his sense of humour. He literally laughed me into his bed.

His cock also of course."

Excellent..... and you'll bring you.... sounds perfect. Come move in

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Cu*t and Kit Kats

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Cu*t and Kit Kats

4 fingers I hope?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

He'll bring the rope, I'll bring the wine +snacks

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By *hortarseWoman over a year ago

Norfolk

"Well I bake cakes drink loads of coffee and I love me some pussy so u decide

That's not the idea..... you say what you'll bring!"

He bring his great smile and great hands

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By *ad NannaWoman over a year ago

East London

I'll bring bake at home Greggs pastries and painkillers.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"He'll bring the rope, I'll bring the wine +snacks "

He needs one more thing Midnight....

Or is he the second thing?

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Well I bake cakes drink loads of coffee and I love me some pussy so u decide

That's not the idea..... you say what you'll bring!

He bring his great smile and great hands

Ideal!

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

[Removed by poster at 06/03/21 09:57:48]

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I'll bring bake at home Greggs pastries and painkillers.

I've got all the painkillers! But pasties... ooh

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Both hafes off me ie natalie and also my man counter part lol x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Cu*t and Kit Kats

4 fingers I hope?"
but of course

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Coffee and cake? I remember when Burger King did a coffee and donut for £2 when I was at college. This was where I spent most of my days...

*anyone else just sang the next line there ^

Damn you for the earworm! Damn you!

Bring coffee and donuts...."

You are welcome

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By *ex HolesMan over a year ago

Up North

Smelly knob and the clap

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By *r G888Man over a year ago

south Wales

Vodka and cock

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By *ilverjagMan over a year ago

swansea

"I would tell them that I'd just been watching an old 1944 film called, Fanny by gaslight. Now I could sit and watch cunt by candlelight.

Cleverly done.... but what are you bringing? Candles and...."

Candles and something to ignite that flame of course.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Can they just post the cake and wine to me?

I'm not feeling sociable

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By *rispyDuckMan over a year ago

Chinese Takeaway near you

Good Cock & Cheeky bants

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Ear plugs and a dildo..

If it doesn't work out i won't have to listen and she can go fuck herself!!!

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Ear plugs and a dildo..

If it doesn't work out i won't have to listen and she can go fuck herself!!!

Bring two dildos

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Good Cock & Cheeky bants

I read that as cheeky pants and was going to ask if that wasn't just a jock strap....

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Can they just post the cake and wine to me?

I'm not feeling sociable

Come here. I have both and we can stroke each others hair and not talk.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I would tell them that I'd just been watching an old 1944 film called, Fanny by gaslight. Now I could sit and watch cunt by candlelight.

Cleverly done.... but what are you bringing? Candles and....

Candles and something to ignite that flame of course. "

Good thinking!

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Vodka and cock

Make it toffee vodka and move in here...

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

Coffee and Digestives sound ok ??

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Smelly knob and the clap

Oh Mystique.... you sweet talker.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Cu*t and Kit Kats

4 fingers I hope?but of course

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Both hafes off me ie natalie and also my man counter part lol x"

The ideal team

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Coffee and Digestives sound ok ??

Absolutely does....

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

"Coffee and Digestives sound ok ??

Absolutely does....

Served Naked except for an apron

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It has to be tits and squash.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Coffee and Digestives sound ok ??

Absolutely does....

Served Naked except for an apron

You know me. Is being naked when I have hot liquid likely to be a good plan?

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

"Coffee and Digestives sound ok ??

Absolutely does....

Served Naked except for an apron

You know me. Is being naked when I have hot liquid likely to be a good plan?"

I meant me

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"It has to be tits and squash.

Sounds a suitable offer.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"It has to be tits and squash.

Sounds a suitable offer. "

Dammit. I thought I'd come up with the perfect answer. But there it is!

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Coffee and Digestives sound ok ??

Absolutely does....

Served Naked except for an apron

You know me. Is being naked when I have hot liquid likely to be a good plan?

I meant me

So did I! Brave man

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"It has to be tits and squash.

We always bring them!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"It has to be tits and squash.

Sounds a suitable offer.

Dammit. I thought I'd come up with the perfect answer. But there it is!"

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

"Coffee and Digestives sound ok ??

Absolutely does....

Served Naked except for an apron

You know me. Is being naked when I have hot liquid likely to be a good plan?

I meant me

So did I! Brave man

I'll just serve you coffee and a bib for the inevitable spillage

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Coffee and Digestives sound ok ??

Absolutely does....

Served Naked except for an apron

You know me. Is being naked when I have hot liquid likely to be a good plan?

I meant me

So did I! Brave man

I'll just serve you coffee and a bib for the inevitable spillage

See.... you do know!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"It has to be tits and squash.

Sounds a suitable offer. "

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By *rder66Man over a year ago

Tatooine

"I very small bag so I wouldn't have to carry much when I esacped.

Relationship is one thing I'm not sure I would want to live with someone again.

Bring that tie and your bag and move in with me. For the night."

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I very small bag so I wouldn't have to carry much when I esacped.

Relationship is one thing I'm not sure I would want to live with someone again.

Bring that tie and your bag and move in with me. For the night.

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By *ausageNmashCouple over a year ago

Andover

Reminds me of that coffee shop in Covent garden, coffee , cake and kink. Is it still there ?

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Reminds me of that coffee shop in Covent garden, coffee , cake and kink. Is it still there ?"

Oh my goodness! I remember that!

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By *ilverjagMan over a year ago

swansea

"I would tell them that I'd just been watching an old 1944 film called, Fanny by gaslight. Now I could sit and watch cunt by candlelight.

Cleverly done.... but what are you bringing? Candles and....

Candles and something to ignite that flame of course.

Good thinking!"

Up top for thinking, right down the bottom for dancing, anything in between for the spice of life.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I would tell them that I'd just been watching an old 1944 film called, Fanny by gaslight. Now I could sit and watch cunt by candlelight.

Cleverly done.... but what are you bringing? Candles and....

Candles and something to ignite that flame of course.

Good thinking!

Up top for thinking, right down the bottom for dancing, anything in between for the spice of life. "

We tend to use the phrase "for fucking", but the spice of life works too

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Well I bake cakes drink loads of coffee and I love me some pussy so u decide

That's not the idea..... you say what you'll bring!"
I will bring myself and my awesome baking skills of thats not enough then I'm in trouble

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By *etcplCouple over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

Pleasure and Pain

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Well I bake cakes drink loads of coffee and I love me some pussy so u decide

That's not the idea..... you say what you'll bring!

He bring his great smile and great hands

"
awwwww u say all the right things babe x

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By *ikerdude2017Man over a year ago

Rotherham

If the choice is.coffee involved then have to be coffee and cock. But prefer cunt

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By *blowunowMan over a year ago

Rotherham

Hairy and hung,coffee and cock, cream and cum would do nicely

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'd want to bring cheese. I'm not sure cheesy bits sound sexy though so I'll bring a pot of tea with it

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Warm hands body and cock

I'm always warm even when it is freezing cold

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Pringles n my prick

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Crisps and boobs..

Then both have something to nibble on

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Tits and trainers.

For when it gets heavy and I run!

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