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Thinking of leaving fab
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I can'y stay on here consistantly either. I often pop in see whats up then get bored or find someone in real life to interact with.
Might sound rude but even some people on here that wouldn't get touched with a barg pole all of a sudden gets excited on here.
A next thing its the same girls everytime you press search lol |
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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
"There is more to Fab than forum's.
Just common decency to acknowledge or reply.
"
In a web forum? No.
In person? Yes.
Forums are such that I can choose to ignore, shake my head, or not reply to anyone I choose to. You are not guaranteed an answer or acknowledgement, and while it may suck hats just the nature of the internet.
If you feel thats enough for you to leave fab, then no one can change your mind only try and influence it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Who was it?
It is difficult especially when you start a thread. You feel like you’re taking up half the thread when replying to everyone or you feel bad for not replying to everyone! The ones I hate are those that start threads to include everyone and only reply to the hot ones! There’s been a bit of that recently. I really don’t think the majority intend to ignore people though x |
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It can be really disheartening especially if you're feeling a bit isolated already. It's very easy to feel like a bystander on these forums. If you're not robust emotionally or have just had a really bad day it just magnifies those feelings.
There are often threads about being kind and not knowing what other people are going through but those things are usually only applied to people who can express their distress in a certain way. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It can be really disheartening especially if you're feeling a bit isolated already. It's very easy to feel like a bystander on these forums. If you're not robust emotionally or have just had a really bad day it just magnifies those feelings.
There are often threads about being kind and not knowing what other people are going through but those things are usually only applied to people who can express their distress in a certain way."
Couldn't agree more...I start threads just to have some adult interaction....good or bad lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Amazing how many people put it in there status that they are leaving FAB. And guess what, they all stay in the end...  "
And I’m glad they do. We all have bad days and we all think I’ve had enough of this place every now and then. Maybe cut people some slack it’s tough times and nobody knows what people are going through. It’s easy to put a big front on on here which I’m sure a lot of people do sometimes including me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not getting replies is the nature of the beast. It's a public forum and no-one is obligated to reply to you.
I have bad days, like the rest of us, and I'll comment a few times to force myself to be sociable/try and pull myself out of the funk but I still don't expect a reply.
Lockdown exacerbates a lot of feelings though so maybe he should have had a break rather than a hard delete. Suppose we'll never know now though.. |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
"Who was it?
It is difficult especially when you start a thread. You feel like you’re taking up half the thread when replying to everyone or you feel bad for not replying to everyone! The ones I hate are those that start threads to include everyone and only reply to the hot ones! There’s been a bit of that recently. "
Yep; not a big fan in the slightest. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Who was it?
It is difficult especially when you start a thread. You feel like you’re taking up half the thread when replying to everyone or you feel bad for not replying to everyone! The ones I hate are those that start threads to include everyone and only reply to the hot ones! There’s been a bit of that recently. I really don’t think the majority intend to ignore people though x"
This is my biggest fear when starting threads. Including everyone who replies is a hell of an effort and I applaud those who do, but if I leave it as is, I don't like seeing it fall off the page  |
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I've been on here for 14 years, and although I'm out of most people's age ranges, I'm just here for the forums and socials mostly now. If I don't log in for a while, Jim sends out a search party for me |
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"Who was it?
It is difficult especially when you start a thread. You feel like you’re taking up half the thread when replying to everyone or you feel bad for not replying to everyone! The ones I hate are those that start threads to include everyone and only reply to the hot ones! There’s been a bit of that recently. I really don’t think the majority intend to ignore people though x"
There has been a lot of that recently...more so 2 or 3 people who take over the whole thread. |
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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago
Liverpool |
"Who was it?
It is difficult especially when you start a thread. You feel like you’re taking up half the thread when replying to everyone or you feel bad for not replying to everyone! The ones I hate are those that start threads to include everyone and only reply to the hot ones! There’s been a bit of that recently. I really don’t think the majority intend to ignore people though x
This is my biggest fear when starting threads. Including everyone who replies is a hell of an effort and I applaud those who do, but if I leave it as is, I don't like seeing it fall off the page "
Same. Also some comments don't invite a response to be made, or you don't particularly have a response you can make.
Can't include everyone just for the sake of doing so.
|
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"Who was it?
It is difficult especially when you start a thread. You feel like you’re taking up half the thread when replying to everyone or you feel bad for not replying to everyone! The ones I hate are those that start threads to include everyone and only reply to the hot ones! There’s been a bit of that recently. I really don’t think the majority intend to ignore people though x
This is my biggest fear when starting threads. Including everyone who replies is a hell of an effort and I applaud those who do, but if I leave it as is, I don't like seeing it fall off the page
Same. Also some comments don't invite a response to be made, or you don't particularly have a response you can make.
Can't include everyone just for the sake of doing so.
"
I openly admit I'm not always very good at responding to newbies. Not because I don't care, the point is I do, I don't want to offend them.... but I ain't daft, I know I can easily offend with an off the cuff comment so there are times I sit back and try to learn about them before I open my big gob. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not getting replies is the nature of the beast. It's a public forum and no-one is obligated to reply to you.
I have bad days, like the rest of us, and I'll comment a few times to force myself to be sociable/try and pull myself out of the funk but I still don't expect a reply.
Lockdown exacerbates a lot of feelings though so maybe he should have had a break rather than a hard delete. Suppose we'll never know now though.."
Particularly responding to this bit ...
“and I'll comment a few times to force myself to be sociable”
... that’s what started me off responding. I’m pretty quiet in real-life. But I’m forcing myself to get braver commenting and joining in. It’s easier on here than real life too I think? I feel a little foolish sometimes if its completely missed lol but it’s no biggie, everyone commenting at the same time in a big, often 30+ people conversation ... things always going to get swept along ... I might look back and check because it’s fun if someone has responded to you personally but if not it wouldn’t make me leave. Sulk a bit maybe  ... but not leave
OP just having a crap day maybe? Hopefully they’ll come back - and next time not take it personally xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not getting replies is the nature of the beast. It's a public forum and no-one is obligated to reply to you.
I have bad days, like the rest of us, and I'll comment a few times to force myself to be sociable/try and pull myself out of the funk but I still don't expect a reply.
Lockdown exacerbates a lot of feelings though so maybe he should have had a break rather than a hard delete. Suppose we'll never know now though..
Particularly responding to this bit ...
“and I'll comment a few times to force myself to be sociable”
... that’s what started me off responding. I’m pretty quiet in real-life. But I’m forcing myself to get braver commenting and joining in. It’s easier on here than real life too I think? I feel a little foolish sometimes if its completely missed lol but it’s no biggie, everyone commenting at the same time in a big, often 30+ people conversation ... things always going to get swept along ... I might look back and check because it’s fun if someone has responded to you personally but if not it wouldn’t make me leave. Sulk a bit maybe ... but not leave
OP just having a crap day maybe? Hopefully they’ll come back - and next time not take it personally xxx"
I often agree with posts but can't do a  to them all as it would flood the thread. Lots of people may feel the same about yours. |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
It’s sad but I think that this is another example of expectation vs reality and dare I say, the entitled nature of some folks.
No one is owed a response and sometimes people get overlooked. As well as that, some people read a lack of responses as being ignored when they’re not, they just haven’t been reposted directly.
This isn’t Facebook, there isn’t a like button for comments. Getting uppity about it is just a touch entitled |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not getting replies is the nature of the beast. It's a public forum and no-one is obligated to reply to you.
I have bad days, like the rest of us, and I'll comment a few times to force myself to be sociable/try and pull myself out of the funk but I still don't expect a reply.
Lockdown exacerbates a lot of feelings though so maybe he should have had a break rather than a hard delete. Suppose we'll never know now though..
Particularly responding to this bit ...
“and I'll comment a few times to force myself to be sociable”
... that’s what started me off responding. I’m pretty quiet in real-life. But I’m forcing myself to get braver commenting and joining in. It’s easier on here than real life too I think? I feel a little foolish sometimes if its completely missed lol but it’s no biggie, everyone commenting at the same time in a big, often 30+ people conversation ... things always going to get swept along ... I might look back and check because it’s fun if someone has responded to you personally but if not it wouldn’t make me leave. Sulk a bit maybe ... but not leave
OP just having a crap day maybe? Hopefully they’ll come back - and next time not take it personally xxx
I often agree with posts but can't do a to them all as it would flood the thread. Lots of people may feel the same about yours. "
Aww thank you xx
*sighs with relief at a response lol
x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Aw, this post got replies & wasn't ignored, but he left anyway. Some people are never happy 
"
They’ll come back even if only to lurk ... it’s irresistible |
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"Im gonna buck the trend and say...
I dont like the threads where mainly guys agree regardless of the thread,with the hot females..."
Twas ever thus but I'll buck n up your trend.
If you happen to be a female who doesn't simper .....sniff. |
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"Who was it anyway?
This has been asked and asked and asked but no one reads posts .... do they
BHG something something. It wasn't a word, it was letters "
Thanks Gorgeous
Ahem ...... no idea sos.......  I do hope he's happy. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Oh, he's gone
I'll take the blame for asking him a question he may not have been able to answer without admitting his expectation may have been a little off."
Peach the Slayer.....  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Who was it?
It is difficult especially when you start a thread. You feel like you’re taking up half the thread when replying to everyone or you feel bad for not replying to everyone! The ones I hate are those that start threads to include everyone and only reply to the hot ones! There’s been a bit of that recently. I really don’t think the majority intend to ignore people though x"
I only reply to the hot ones....  , unless others have said something interesting, which is rare.... |
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"Who was it?
It is difficult especially when you start a thread. You feel like you’re taking up half the thread when replying to everyone or you feel bad for not replying to everyone! The ones I hate are those that start threads to include everyone and only reply to the hot ones! There’s been a bit of that recently. I really don’t think the majority intend to ignore people though x"
Very much agree to that |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think most of the comments on this thread sums up how the OP was feeling....strange because I see alot of threads about being nice to fellow members.....oh I get it now,thread wasnt started by a woman so you can bully someone who has left..... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Treat others how you’d like to be treated , don’t be a troll.
Toxic people always seem to make an appearance when someone is down.
Who knows what that person may be going through. |
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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago
East London |
"Treat others how you’d like to be treated , don’t be a troll.
Toxic people always seem to make an appearance when someone is down.
Who knows what that person may be going through."
This is true. Unfortunately, sometimes on here people forget they have told others to be kind, or are only kind to their friends or people they fancy. |
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By *viatrixWoman
over a year ago
Redhill |
"
There has been a lot of that recently...more so 2 or 3 people who take over the whole thread."
True. It is interesting to see how the... *sits on hands to avoid saying the C word* let’s call them- “dominating forumite groups” change over the years... and I’ve only been here for 3 years!
I never start threads because the 2 or 3 I ever started got blatantly ignored. The forum is not my main reason to be here, though- it’s more in the background to read when I am really bored, so it doesn’t affect me. But I have noticed. Someone more sensitive may be affected by it and want to leave.
The advantage of not being included as such as that I am also oblivious to whatever gossip or drama that can be thrown around sometime. |
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"Treat others how you’d like to be treated , don’t be a troll.
Toxic people always seem to make an appearance when someone is down.
Who knows what that person may be going through.
This is true. Unfortunately, sometimes on here people forget they have told others to be kind, or are only kind to their friends or people they fancy."
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By *RSTCouple
over a year ago
S. Northants |
Has anyone ever benefitted from announcing their impending departure on here? Do you suddenly get a surge of hopeful candidates, perfectly suited to your fantasies and desires?
If so, we're leaving too...  |
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Whoever says 'fab is a nice place' is lying. Sure, it has some lovely people and some cockwombles but overall there are alas more of the latter. Be thick skinned, take everything with a pinch of salt and a squeeze of lemon and you will do well.
Then have a giggle and expect nadda. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
There has been a lot of that recently...more so 2 or 3 people who take over the whole thread.
True. It is interesting to see how the... *sits on hands to avoid saying the C word* let’s call them- “dominating forumite groups” change over the years... and I’ve only been here for 3 years!
I never start threads because the 2 or 3 I ever started got blatantly ignored. The forum is not my main reason to be here, though- it’s more in the background to read when I am really bored, so it doesn’t affect me. But I have noticed. Someone more sensitive may be affected by it and want to leave.
The advantage of not being included as such as that I am also oblivious to whatever gossip or drama that can be thrown around sometime. "
What I found is that there’s a bit of a chicken and egg situation. If you don’t start threads/post then no one really knows you so don’t tend to respond. If you keep at it, they do and you get more of a response.
Unfortunately you need a thicker skin at the start but then isn’t that the same in most social situations where you don’t know anyone else? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think the OP was probably asking for help....not everyone can say
I need help..
He really didn't give much of a chance. Was 12 mins before he was gone."
Maybe his previous threads were him asking and this was the goodbye? |
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"I think the OP was probably asking for help....not everyone can say
I need help..
He really didn't give much of a chance. Was 12 mins before he was gone."
Peach... would you really have given him 12 minutes?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think the OP was probably asking for help....not everyone can say
I need help..
He really didn't give much of a chance. Was 12 mins before he was gone."
I normally last longer than ....
* Are we talking about the same thing? |
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"I think the OP was probably asking for help....not everyone can say
I need help..
He really didn't give much of a chance. Was 12 mins before he was gone.
Maybe his previous threads were him asking and this was the goodbye? "
I don't know, I didn't see his previous threads so can only comment on this one.
Yes I was blunt but I don't see that as bullying, I was asking him to answer a question that may have changed his thought process |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think the OP was probably asking for help....not everyone can say
I need help.."
oh my God. Good luck to anyone, esp a guy saying ‘ I find it hard dealing with fab and the way it makes me feel sidelined and the popular kids are having fun’.
I’d leave that to talking to my mates and people who care about me. You know? |
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"I think the OP was probably asking for help....not everyone can say
I need help..
He really didn't give much of a chance. Was 12 mins before he was gone.
Peach... would you really have given him 12 minutes? "
If I'd had a power nap maybe |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think the OP was probably asking for help....not everyone can say
I need help..
oh my God. Good luck to anyone, esp a guy saying ‘ I find it hard dealing with fab and the way it makes me feel sidelined and the popular kids are having fun’.
I’d leave that to talking to my mates and people who care about me. You know?"
Maybe because we are in lockdown he felt alone and was just looking for a positive word from anyone and now he's gone your all quick to piss all over him..... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think the OP was probably asking for help....not everyone can say
I need help..
oh my God. Good luck to anyone, esp a guy saying ‘ I find it hard dealing with fab and the way it makes me feel sidelined and the popular kids are having fun’.
I’d leave that to talking to my mates and people who care about me. You know?
Maybe because we are in lockdown he felt alone and was just looking for a positive word from anyone and now he's gone your all quick to piss all over him....."
I didn’t know the fella, and I would guess others didn’t too.
And I am certainly not pissing on him. I actually would have agreed with your assessment. if I could have posted before he left, i May have had the chance to say something to him instead of replying to others posts. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Treat others how you’d like to be treated , don’t be a troll.
Toxic people always seem to make an appearance when someone is down.
Who knows what that person may be going through.
This is true. Unfortunately, sometimes on here people forget they have told others to be kind, or are only kind to their friends or people they fancy."
|
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
"I like to comment on threads started by hot or popular women to see how many times I'm ignored.
I do that and it never fails to surprise me "
But Sparkles, every recent thread of yours I've commented on you've not replied yet have replied to others...
I've not leapt to the conclusion that it's deliberate (although sometimes it so clearly is!). Give others the benefit of doubt.
Having typed that, I might start doing this and see what happens. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Who was it anyway?
This has been asked and asked and asked but no one reads posts .... do they "
I did read tbe whole thread, and have received hate mail, but still non the wiser! |
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