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Has it changed you in any way?
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By *affron40 OP Woman
over a year ago
manchester |
So this last year most people have had more time to reflect on life... and it’s safe to say our lives have changed dramatically.
How has that impacted you?
Has it changed your attitude to life/fab life? Has it made you want to get right back out there and have sex freely, or has it led you to wanting something more, that involves companionship too?
Has it changed anything with your family dynamic?
I’m a crap fabber anyway so no plans to get out anywhere, but it’s definitely made me appreciate my close friendships and I’ll be pushing myself to socialise more when this is over.
Over to you  |
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Not really. I’ve quite enjoyed lockdown. I’ve been busy. Winter is always a bit meh for me as I like sunshine and warmth. I appreciate the countryside more and simple things more than anything I’ve purchased and especially my health. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Whilst I was happy in my own company and maximising my spare time prior to start of 1st lockdown, I've come to appreciate my freedom more. Ive always appreciated the little things and my closest family and friends. However I'd like to seek someone who is open to a relationship as I miss the companionship (as well as obvious sex). |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Evening saff,
Its changed me in respect of i feel i dont 'need' sex to function, when i speak to a women in person, work or online my first thought used to be 'i want to get you into bed'now i tend to talk to them as a person and definitelynot flirty whatso ever- this feels good especially from a professional work sense.
I feel as if my sex drive has really been tamed and what id call 'normal' now, maybe a little too tamed   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Lovely post Saffron, I really feel its changed me in a good way, I really appreciate those closest to me, and it's really made me rethink the way I approach fab, I am definitely enjoying this time to get to know people, and form deeper "relationships" with those I'm chatting with.
Just feeling lots of gratitude for what I have, for having a roof over my head and all those other things I've taken for granted |
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By *affron40 OP Woman
over a year ago
manchester |
"Not really. I’ve quite enjoyed lockdown. I’ve been busy. Winter is always a bit meh for me as I like sunshine and warmth. I appreciate the countryside more and simple things more than anything I’ve purchased and especially my health. "
I’ve enjoyed it in the main, but I’ve found it hard to watch others struggling and felt very helpless at times. |
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By *affron40 OP Woman
over a year ago
manchester |
"Whilst I was happy in my own company and maximising my spare time prior to start of 1st lockdown, I've come to appreciate my freedom more. Ive always appreciated the little things and my closest family and friends. However I'd like to seek someone who is open to a relationship as I miss the companionship (as well as obvious sex). "
With you x it does emphasise the little gaps that you don’t miss until you have such a lot of solitary time. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i’m definitely looking for something more companionship based
i’ve had plenty offers for a “bubble” where people really mean lets make it so we are allowed to meet up and shag
sure i love sex but thats not what i am missing this year |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My mate in Ireland lost his partner suddenly in December leaving him with a young child to being up without her mother. I was gutted I couldn't visit and still can't. He needs support and I xant be there. Hopefully soon. |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
I've had so much happen in the last year and not all of it COVID related that I really couldn't say if, or how, I've changed - a lot of things have been put into perspective for sure, and priorities have been realigned in some ways, but me the person I think is much the same, just taking each day as it comes and see what it brings. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My mate in Ireland lost his partner suddenly in December leaving him with a young child to being up without her mother. I was gutted I couldn't visit and still can't. He needs support and I xant be there. Hopefully soon. "
Oh god that's so sad, and so hard for you to not be there for your friend. So sorry, hope you get there soon x |
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By *affron40 OP Woman
over a year ago
manchester |
"Lovely post Saffron, I really feel its changed me in a good way, I really appreciate those closest to me, and it's really made me rethink the way I approach fab, I am definitely enjoying this time to get to know people, and form deeper "relationships" with those I'm chatting with.
Just feeling lots of gratitude for what I have, for having a roof over my head and all those other things I've taken for granted "
Definitely brings home the good things that we often just forget  I think for many it’s been a positive change for making conversation with both old and new friends x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I own a construction business and we haven’t stopped work! If anything we are busier than ever. So nothing changed for me apart from hoping my holiday abroad in June will still go ahead x |
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By *affron40 OP Woman
over a year ago
manchester |
"Evening saff,
Its changed me in respect of i feel i dont 'need' sex to function, when i speak to a women in person, work or online my first thought used to be 'i want to get you into bed'now i tend to talk to them as a person and definitelynot flirty whatso ever- this feels good especially from a professional work sense.
I feel as if my sex drive has really been tamed and what id call 'normal' now, maybe a little too tamed "
That’s definitely a good thing then some of the best fun can stem from a lovely friendship too x |
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By *affron40 OP Woman
over a year ago
manchester |
"i’m definitely looking for something more companionship based
i’ve had plenty offers for a “bubble” where people really mean lets make it so we are allowed to meet up and shag
sure i love sex but thats not what i am missing this year "
Deeper connections is definitely a running theme I’ve found x hope you find that! |
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By *affron40 OP Woman
over a year ago
manchester |
"My mate in Ireland lost his partner suddenly in December leaving him with a young child to being up without her mother. I was gutted I couldn't visit and still can't. He needs support and I xant be there. Hopefully soon. "
Christ I’m so sorry  hope you can get over there soon x |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
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I'm going to try and not reply with a stream of consciousness. Yes, it's changed me somewhat. I'm far more grateful for the good that's in my life, far more appreciative of the simple things - like little check in messages or daft conversations that leave me beaming. I think I'm growing soft in my old age.
My attitude towards Fab has changed, as has my attitude towards myself (the latter is still an ongoing process). I spent far too long being concerned about others disliking me, gossip - the usual crap. And stopping myself from doing things that make me happy because I felt I had to be this perfect Meli before I could.
Well, I'm now at the stage where, when possible, I'm going to say yes a lot more, live life to the fullest with no regrets. Life is far too short to not do so, to not go for a coffee with that peculiar friend, to not go for a run with a fabber because they might see me sweaty. I'm going to value special friendships, platonic or not. |
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Oh gosh so much.
As much as I've cried sad depressive frustrated tears at the world and grieving for lots of things, one I was unsure I'd recover from in all honesty and will stay with me and has put me off relationships, I've also cried tears of pure humbleness, appreciation and love for friends. I don't have the words to describe how much I love and cherish them.
I don't want to be the one to put a downer on returning to "normality" but I've seen so much to make me question whether I want to meet again, whether people can be trusted. I know this goes against what I just said about friends but what I mean is I'm unsure whether to let anyone else in or to stay settled with the wonderful people I already have in my life.
There are so many cheats and liars, I don't wanna get caught up in any of that. |
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I've stripped out fb's from my fab life and become a lot stricter on who I exchange sex chat with.
I guess I am embracing my long term relationships that have not changed even with out a year of physical contact and concentrated on the guys who really want to be in my life, not ones who just want to use me as wank fodder |
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I think a lot of us have seen how precarious the good times are and will be keen live life more fully and seize every opportunity.
That creates a pressure of its own though, FOMO if you like. Personally, I do want to try more clubs, especially ones where you can go just to enjoy nude areas/spas etc. |
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It has made us appreciate where we live and how fortunate we are that our business is surviving.
It makes us really appreciate the simple things in life, we did do before Covid but we do even more so now. |
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By *affron40 OP Woman
over a year ago
manchester |
"Oh gosh so much.
As much as I've cried sad depressive frustrated tears at the world and grieving for lots of things, one I was unsure I'd recover from in all honesty and will stay with me and has put me off relationships, I've also cried tears of pure humbleness, appreciation and love for friends. I don't have the words to describe how much I love and cherish them.
I don't want to be the one to put a downer on returning to "normality" but I've seen so much to make me question whether I want to meet again, whether people can be trusted. I know this goes against what I just said about friends but what I mean is I'm unsure whether to let anyone else in or to stay settled with the wonderful people I already have in my life.
There are so many cheats and liars, I don't wanna get caught up in any of that. "
That’s because at the moment it’s hypothetical. When you meet him you’ll know, you’re a wise owl You’re too bloody hilarious and gorgeous to sit on the sidelines. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was doing okay, coping with lockdown, working on my body and feeling really good about myself until I started to feel really tired, unusually so. I reconnected with my brother and got closer to my sister and many friends I hadn't seen in years but the fatigue got worse. In November I saw my GP who sent me to Hospital. I was diagnosed with cancer. I'm still reeling and can't even think about meets, socials etc. With lockdown, I've had a hell of alot of alone time to think about things and my Fab time, I think will end soon. It's been a lot to cope with plus lost my dog and 4 relatives in a year. |
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"I was doing okay, coping with lockdown, working on my body and feeling really good about myself until I started to feel really tired, unusually so. I reconnected with my brother and got closer to my sister and many friends I hadn't seen in years but the fatigue got worse. In November I saw my GP who sent me to Hospital. I was diagnosed with cancer. I'm still reeling and can't even think about meets, socials etc. With lockdown, I've had a hell of alot of alone time to think about things and my Fab time, I think will end soon. It's been a lot to cope with plus lost my dog and 4 relatives in a year. "
Shit, that's a fucker, we've been through the mill too, covid aside. Faced some loss and some shit but be strong. You started off strong, be strong and fight it. Be the best you can x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don’t think either of us have changed as people but we’ve both realised what’s truly important and it’s the smallest of things that matter , also definitely made me realise who my true friends are x |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
"I was doing okay, coping with lockdown, working on my body and feeling really good about myself until I started to feel really tired, unusually so. I reconnected with my brother and got closer to my sister and many friends I hadn't seen in years but the fatigue got worse. In November I saw my GP who sent me to Hospital. I was diagnosed with cancer. I'm still reeling and can't even think about meets, socials etc. With lockdown, I've had a hell of alot of alone time to think about things and my Fab time, I think will end soon. It's been a lot to cope with plus lost my dog and 4 relatives in a year. "
So sorry to hear that Dana - and know words alone can't help but hoping you find the strength and positivity you need. |
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By *affron40 OP Woman
over a year ago
manchester |
"I was doing okay, coping with lockdown, working on my body and feeling really good about myself until I started to feel really tired, unusually so. I reconnected with my brother and got closer to my sister and many friends I hadn't seen in years but the fatigue got worse. In November I saw my GP who sent me to Hospital. I was diagnosed with cancer. I'm still reeling and can't even think about meets, socials etc. With lockdown, I've had a hell of alot of alone time to think about things and my Fab time, I think will end soon. It's been a lot to cope with plus lost my dog and 4 relatives in a year. "
Bloody hell Dana I’m so sorry you’ve had such a shit time. That’s a hell of a lot for anyone to process. Hope you get a bit of distraction and support on here. Be kind to yourself x |
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"I was doing okay, coping with lockdown, working on my body and feeling really good about myself until I started to feel really tired, unusually so. I reconnected with my brother and got closer to my sister and many friends I hadn't seen in years but the fatigue got worse. In November I saw my GP who sent me to Hospital. I was diagnosed with cancer. I'm still reeling and can't even think about meets, socials etc. With lockdown, I've had a hell of alot of alone time to think about things and my Fab time, I think will end soon. It's been a lot to cope with plus lost my dog and 4 relatives in a year. "
Shit Dana. That sucks and I wish you all the strength you will ever need to do whatever you need to do xxx |
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It’s made me realise how lucky I am to have what I have. I knew that anyway but once everything is lifted I’ll make sure I make more memories with my son.
I do need to maybe enjoy myself more,I like my job and hopefully I’m doing ok as a dad,but I don’t do anything else besides those. I should change that when given the chance |
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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago
Travelling |
I'm a comfortable introvert as it is. While I do miss socialising to a degree, other than a few family members, I'm in no dire need to rush out and party, or have some wild orgy.
There are a select few that I've grown close to during the past year (not just fab) that I'm looking forward to meeting up with at some point.
But as I say really not changed from being the usual introvert I've always been.
I actually miss the calm quiet serenity that came with the first lockdown (minus all the virus and the negatives with it). The peacefulness of the outside world. |
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The simple answer is No.
My life has hardly been affected in the slightest.
I've read a lot about mental health, people missing having others in their life, not being able to socialise etc etc...
Well there are some people out there who don't have much of a social life, dont have many friends and don't do much other than get up, go to work, return to an empty home, eat alone, sleep alone, repeat.
I fall in that group and thats been my life for the past 10 years and covid hasn't made a foggiest bit of difference. You actually get resilient to it after a while.
There are a lot of folk out there struggling with covid and its only been 12 months
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The simple answer is No.
My life has hardly been affected in the slightest.
I've read a lot about mental health, people missing having others in their life, not being able to socialise etc etc...
Well there are some people out there who don't have much of a social life, dont have many friends and don't do much other than get up, go to work, return to an empty home, eat alone, sleep alone, repeat.
I fall in that group and thats been my life for the past 10 years and covid hasn't made a foggiest bit of difference. You actually get resilient to it after a while.
There are a lot of folk out there struggling with covid and its only been 12 months
"
Nobody can decide that others shouldn't be struggling just because somebody else has it worse, I find that quite a difficult mindset to understand.
Yes lots of people have felt alone for years but this is an entirely different situation.
For many their lives were turned on its head overnight.
Some people have lost loved ones, lost jobs, been isolated for the first time in there lives. Even if that hasn't happened last year and this year so far have been very difficult for many for many different reasons and there feelings are just as valid as yours. |
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"I was doing okay, coping with lockdown, working on my body and feeling really good about myself until I started to feel really tired, unusually so. I reconnected with my brother and got closer to my sister and many friends I hadn't seen in years but the fatigue got worse. In November I saw my GP who sent me to Hospital. I was diagnosed with cancer. I'm still reeling and can't even think about meets, socials etc. With lockdown, I've had a hell of alot of alone time to think about things and my Fab time, I think will end soon. It's been a lot to cope with plus lost my dog and 4 relatives in a year. "
It’s an awful lot to cope with but you have and you are xx |
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I’ve lost close friends, acquaintances and literally 11 days ago my boss.
I’m not sure if it’s changed much about me other than the wish to really enjoy and make the most of my life. No more feeling self conscious about wanting to explore the fantasies so long hidden away, feeling abnormal and shameful. I’m just hoping I’ve not left it to late. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not really. I’ve quite enjoyed lockdown. I’ve been busy. Winter is always a bit meh for me as I like sunshine and warmth. I appreciate the countryside more and simple things more than anything I’ve purchased and especially my health. "
what he said |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I was doing okay, coping with lockdown, working on my body and feeling really good about myself until I started to feel really tired, unusually so. I reconnected with my brother and got closer to my sister and many friends I hadn't seen in years but the fatigue got worse. In November I saw my GP who sent me to Hospital. I was diagnosed with cancer. I'm still reeling and can't even think about meets, socials etc. With lockdown, I've had a hell of alot of alone time to think about things and my Fab time, I think will end soon. It's been a lot to cope with plus lost my dog and 4 relatives in a year. "
Oh Dana I'm so sorry you have had such an awful time.
Well I for one am glad you are still posting and hope you continue to do so. X |
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Before lockdown social time was restricted to weekends as I was hardly ever home... during this awful pandemic I have learned to appreciate....
How much I love my home space
Which of my friends are ‘true’ friends
The value of my job - it’s kept me sane at times
That being home alone isn’t such a bad thing and I’ve embraced it
When we can socialise it will be a joy but of far more value than it ever was
I’ve also learned who are the genuine people here in fab... those who ‘check-in’ regularly and maintain contact.... and maybe I’m a little less prickly? Yes Meli?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Before lockdown social time was restricted to weekends as I was hardly ever home... during this awful pandemic I have learned to appreciate....
How much I love my home space
Which of my friends are ‘true’ friends
The value of my job - it’s kept me sane at times
That being home alone isn’t such a bad thing and I’ve embraced it
When we can socialise it will be a joy but of far more value than it ever was
I’ve also learned who are the genuine people here in fab... those who ‘check-in’ regularly and maintain contact.... and maybe I’m a little less prickly? Yes Meli?
"
You prickly!  |
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"Before lockdown social time was restricted to weekends as I was hardly ever home... during this awful pandemic I have learned to appreciate....
How much I love my home space
Which of my friends are ‘true’ friends
The value of my job - it’s kept me sane at times
That being home alone isn’t such a bad thing and I’ve embraced it
When we can socialise it will be a joy but of far more value than it ever was
I’ve also learned who are the genuine people here in fab... those who ‘check-in’ regularly and maintain contact.... and maybe I’m a little less prickly? Yes Meli?
You prickly! "
Lol no Lorna never lol |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
" I’ve also learned who are the genuine people here in fab... those who ‘check-in’ regularly and maintain contact.... and maybe I’m a little less prickly? Yes Meli?
"
You are less prickly DC! I've read the softer, more vulnerable side of you this past year and I think it's part of why you're awesome - being comfortable enough to show your underbelly is wonderful. |
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It definitely has changed the way I deal with people. I’m less inclined to be so resolute in my opinion of others. We’re all having a shite time of it and a little leeway is called for in most cases.
I surprised myself with my capacity to be strong emotionally and hold everyone else up as much as I am able.
As a mama, it made me a fierce advocate for young people’s mental health. These strange times will be imprinted on our younglings for a very long time. Please don’t tell them they’re too young to understand what anxiety or depression is. Their emotions and feelings are as valid as any adult. |
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" I’ve also learned who are the genuine people here in fab... those who ‘check-in’ regularly and maintain contact.... and maybe I’m a little less prickly? Yes Meli?
You are less prickly DC! I've read the softer, more vulnerable side of you this past year and I think it's part of why you're awesome - being comfortable enough to show your underbelly is wonderful. "
Bless you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I wouldn’t say it’s changed my attitude to my fab life, I definitely want to get right back out there although prior to Covid I’d only really meet local ... well that’s going out the window when it’s safe to do so.
I’ve made great friends some I’ve spoke to some for the best part of a year and can’t wait to meet them they are all further afield...
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