 |
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
My other half oddly says the more she mentions BDSM on her profile the smaller the number of messages she gets.
I think for the reasons above lots of people either down play it or leave it off their profile completely.
Its a shame but understandable |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ensualMan
over a year ago
Sutton |
I think there are a lot of talk that perpetuates stereotypes and there is not a lot of cool rational analysis.
I may not have been in the scene as long as many but I have got around.
From what I have seen I divide male subs into 4 categories.
There is the Porn Male, who has watched a lot of porn and seen porn actresses pretending to be dommes having sex with their submissives, and thinks "I will badge myself submissive to get some of that."
There are the Dominants, what they do is similar to topping from the bottom. They want things done to them which some would call submissive acts. But domination and submission can sometimes be a matter of perspective. Basically they want to call the shots so are dominants but have not done the self analysis to know what they are.
There are the Hungry/Specialist Submissives, they know who they are and know what they want. They would like to find a relationship domme, but either they have specialised needs that require a Pro Domme or are happy to use the skills of a Pro Domme.
The Relationship Submissive, they have done the self analysis and know what they want. What they want is a loving relationshipship with a dominant woman. They realise there is a lot of competition and would rather wait until they developed a relationship with the right woman.
These are broad categories and people may be in different categories entirely and categories may blend into each other.
Of course feel free to disagree, but please bring some analysis rather than tarring most male subs. From the ones I have spoken too, I think it is one of the least glamorous and one of the most maligned group to find oneself in as a kinkster. I can't think of a film or TV series with a positive portrayal of a male sub. When talking to male subs in the last two categories I found real hurt in not finding what they need. The same hurt I find talking to female submissives that can't find the right dom/domme for a relationship.
Even on my most fed up days with the scene I feel blessed to have found myself as dominant. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I would add that I am not having a go at anyone in this thread. It just prompted something I was mulling over."
I think you presented that very well. I remember first trying to get involved in the scene as a single guy and what a struggle it was. I admire lots of submissive men for their determination and resilience |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ensualMan
over a year ago
Sutton |
"I would add that I am not having a go at anyone in this thread. It just prompted something I was mulling over.
I think you presented that very well. I remember first trying to get involved in the scene as a single guy and what a struggle it was. I admire lots of submissive men for their determination and resilience "
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
