I'd really really like to be able to look back on this.lockdown and think I'd made some friends on fab, ladies or couples who are interesting, attractive, intelligent, captivating and sincere.
Lockdown being what it is I really can't see the harm in chatting, getting to know people and building up friendships through networking.
Am I an idiot for wanting this? Am I wrong to feel frustrated that I can't find it?
I realise that as a single straight man I'm not in demand in any way, but over and above e sex I'd like friendship. Friendship and sex why is that so seemingly out of reach? |
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Not an idiot at all...
I’m of the same mindset, yes I do have friends off fab but they don’t know I’m on here or what I’m actually into.
So I’ve been using these past few months as a way of making new friends with similar interests x |
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"Not an idiot at all...
I’m of the same mindset, yes I do have friends off fab but they don’t know I’m on here or what I’m actually into.
So I’ve been using these past few months as a way of making new friends with similar interests x"
This! X |
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"Don't you have real life friends who might ease your loneliness feelings at this time?"
Don’t know about the OP but the vast majority of my friends and family live all over the country. Before Covid my time off was spent travelling to them or hosting them at mine, which obviously isn’t possible at the moment.
I’d also like to find friends through here and like to think I’ve made one or two at least! |
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"Don't you have real life friends who might ease your loneliness feelings at this time?
Don’t know about the OP but the vast majority of my friends and family live all over the country. Before Covid my time off was spent travelling to them or hosting them at mine, which obviously isn’t possible at the moment.
I’d also like to find friends through here and like to think I’ve made one or two at least!"
This   |
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"I'd really really like to be able to look back on this.lockdown and think I'd made some friends on fab, ladies or couples who are interesting, attractive, intelligent, captivating and sincere.
Lockdown being what it is I really can't see the harm in chatting, getting to know people and building up friendships through networking.
Am I an idiot for wanting this? Am I wrong to feel frustrated that I can't find it?
I realise that as a single straight man I'm not in demand in any way, but over and above e sex I'd like friendship. Friendship and sex why is that so seemingly out of reach?"
Of course you're not an idiot dude. Loneliness fucking sucks , I feel it often too , obviously i dont know your Vanilla friends situation, all I can say is when you are at your lowest you will know who they are .
Stay strong dude , my inbox is open always, as it is for anyone |
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"I'd really really like to be able to look back on this.lockdown and think I'd made some friends on fab, ladies or couples who are interesting, attractive, intelligent, captivating and sincere.
Lockdown being what it is I really can't see the harm in chatting, getting to know people and building up friendships through networking.
Am I an idiot for wanting this? Am I wrong to feel frustrated that I can't find it?
I realise that as a single straight man I'm not in demand in any way, but over and above e sex I'd like friendship. Friendship and sex why is that so seemingly out of reach?
Of course you're not an idiot dude. Loneliness fucking sucks , I feel it often too , obviously i dont know your Vanilla friends situation, all I can say is when you are at your lowest you will know who they are .
Stay strong dude , my inbox is open always, as it is for anyone "
That's real friendship. |
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"Not an idiot at all...
I’m of the same mindset, yes I do have friends off fab but they don’t know I’m on here or what I’m actually into.
So I’ve been using these past few months as a way of making new friends with similar interests x"
Also agree with this... my regular friends know nothing about my sexual preferences so friends from here gives me an extra outlet for sharing thoughts and feelings that I can’t with others!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m really sorry you’re feeling that way, as many others are.
In all honesty while I’m sure that friendship is possible from Fab I feel for a single man, especially a newbie, it can be an unforgiving place with a high degree of rejection and indifference, neither of which are good for those suffering with isolation.
Quite recently I had a couple of very friendly message threads go completely dead. It was no big deal, I understand how many messages women receive and no one here has to explain themselves to a stranger. But it’s an example of how things go on Fab a lot of the time.
I think websites where you have common interests with other people would be a more likely place to find good friendship and support.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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but also there are people on here not looking for online friendship some are looking just to find real life fun (non covid times)..i only talk to those i have an interest in meeting one day or staying in touch with those ive already met/know ...
but hope you find what your looking for op x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We're happy to make friends on fab but we can't and won't guarantee sex along with it. That puts most people off, leading me to believe that they don't actually want friends at all."
Exactly this
Most guys on here dont want chat, support and friendship
They just want wank fodder.
Which is a shame really, because if they had a bit more self awareness and patience, it would benefit them on lots of fronts |
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"We're happy to make friends on fab but we can't and won't guarantee sex along with it. That puts most people off, leading me to believe that they don't actually want friends at all.
Exactly this
Most guys on here dont want chat, support and friendship
They just want wank fodder.
Which is a shame really, because if they had a bit more self awareness and patience, it would benefit them on lots of fronts"
Agree with this as well, although there are some people on here who can make the distinction! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not an idiot at all...
I’m of the same mindset, yes I do have friends off fab but they don’t know I’m on here or what I’m actually into.
So I’ve been using these past few months as a way of making new friends with similar interests x"
I agree not an idiot !!!! This hits the nail on the head... we all have friends off Fab but this is a side we don’t share with them or at least most of them, therefore using this hoping to find friendship and fun during these difficult times and hopefully once it’s over, there will be a circle of friends with a common interest. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Exactly this
Most guys on here dont want chat, support and friendship
They just want wank fodder.
Which is a shame really, because if they had a bit more self awareness and patience, it would benefit them on lots of fronts"
I’m sure that’s true but I’m not sure how many women or couples are here looking for friendship with single men either. My impression is they are more likely to seek out each other for friendship and men for sexual relationships which is hardly surprising for a Swinging website ! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Exactly this
Most guys on here dont want chat, support and friendship
They just want wank fodder.
Which is a shame really, because if they had a bit more self awareness and patience, it would benefit them on lots of fronts
I’m sure that’s true but I’m not sure how many women or couples are here looking for friendship with single men either. My impression is they are more likely to seek out each other for friendship and men for sexual relationships which is hardly surprising for a Swinging website ! "
My point was that men say they are looking for friendship/chat until we can all meet again
But convos get sexual pretty quickly
|
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"
Exactly this
Most guys on here dont want chat, support and friendship
They just want wank fodder.
Which is a shame really, because if they had a bit more self awareness and patience, it would benefit them on lots of fronts
I’m sure that’s true but I’m not sure how many women or couples are here looking for friendship with single men either. My impression is they are more likely to seek out each other for friendship and men for sexual relationships which is hardly surprising for a Swinging website !
My point was that men say they are looking for friendship/chat until we can all meet again
But convos get sexual pretty quickly
"
Or....now we have been chatting, I think we are really suited.....let's meet. No I was just being polite and keeping the conversation light. Then comes the but I think.....but you sound perfect.....let's just meet for coffee and see how it goes... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Exactly this
Most guys on here dont want chat, support and friendship
They just want wank fodder.
Which is a shame really, because if they had a bit more self awareness and patience, it would benefit them on lots of fronts
I’m sure that’s true but I’m not sure how many women or couples are here looking for friendship with single men either. My impression is they are more likely to seek out each other for friendship and men for sexual relationships which is hardly surprising for a Swinging website !
My point was that men say they are looking for friendship/chat until we can all meet again
But convos get sexual pretty quickly
Or....now we have been chatting, I think we are really suited.....let's meet. No I was just being polite and keeping the conversation light. Then comes the but I think.....but you sound perfect.....let's just meet for coffee and see how it goes..."
Yup |
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"
Exactly this
Most guys on here dont want chat, support and friendship
They just want wank fodder.
Which is a shame really, because if they had a bit more self awareness and patience, it would benefit them on lots of fronts
I’m sure that’s true but I’m not sure how many women or couples are here looking for friendship with single men either. My impression is they are more likely to seek out each other for friendship and men for sexual relationships which is hardly surprising for a Swinging website !
My point was that men say they are looking for friendship/chat until we can all meet again
But convos get sexual pretty quickly
Or....now we have been chatting, I think we are really suited.....let's meet. No I was just being polite and keeping the conversation light. Then comes the but I think.....but you sound perfect.....let's just meet for coffee and see how it goes...
Yup"
And then they get hurt because they have got their hopes up, then I feel awful, reflecting back onto what I said that may have given them an impression things were heading to a physical meet  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Exactly this
Most guys on here dont want chat, support and friendship
They just want wank fodder.
Which is a shame really, because if they had a bit more self awareness and patience, it would benefit them on lots of fronts
I’m sure that’s true but I’m not sure how many women or couples are here looking for friendship with single men either. My impression is they are more likely to seek out each other for friendship and men for sexual relationships which is hardly surprising for a Swinging website !
My point was that men say they are looking for friendship/chat until we can all meet again
But convos get sexual pretty quickly
Or....now we have been chatting, I think we are really suited.....let's meet. No I was just being polite and keeping the conversation light. Then comes the but I think.....but you sound perfect.....let's just meet for coffee and see how it goes...
Yup
And then they get hurt because they have got their hopes up, then I feel awful, reflecting back onto what I said that may have given them an impression things were heading to a physical meet "
Yup
As i said, if guys on here employed a bit of self awareness..
Nah. Aint gonna happen |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Yup
And then they get hurt because they have got their hopes up, then I feel awful, reflecting back onto what I said that may have given them an impression things were heading to a physical meet "
Again, I don’t doubt that experience is common but it doesn’t answer the question of how many women and couples want friendship with men from Fab which was what the OP was asking about. I just don’t think it is many which is why I doubt Fab is a good place to look.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Friends on sites like these are important and if sex along the way happens, then great, but I think I’d rather have a few non-sexual mates that I can be open with about sex than a load of shag buddies who want sex and nothing more.
Lockdown, especially the first one, taught me that.
Hope that makes sense. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We're happy to make friends on fab but we can't and won't guarantee sex along with it. That puts most people off, leading me to believe that they don't actually want friends at all."
I get this too |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I’m really sorry you’re feeling that way, as many others are.
In all honesty while I’m sure that friendship is possible from Fab I feel for a single man, especially a newbie, it can be an unforgiving place with a high degree of rejection and indifference, neither of which are good for those suffering with isolation.
Quite recently I had a couple of very friendly message threads go completely dead. It was no big deal, I understand how many messages women receive and no one here has to explain themselves to a stranger. But it’s an example of how things go on Fab a lot of the time.
I think websites where you have common interests with other people would be a more likely place to find good friendship and support.
"
I assume that people on here who want to be 'friends' want to chat about sex or have sex.
Some really do just want to be friends but not many. |
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Know the feeling all too well OP. I've got no family that live in the country, they are a 24 hour flight away. Not seen work friends since lockdown kicked in. I made a couple fo good friends on here a while back but they've gone missing off the site.
I'd love to strike up a friendship or two with a few of the lovely ladies on here, even if it's just for a bit of chatting now and then.
Any message I tend to send just gets deleted without being read. I can appreciate girls are flooded with loads of messages and may just bulk delete and that I'm prob not the most desirable so it does make it hard to strike up a conversation.
All you can do is try though! |
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