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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
Chuck your best joke in below, make people smile on Monday
I’ve heard a rumour that lots of Germans are stockpiling cheese & sausage in the anticipation of another COVID lockdown - in other words planning for a Wurst-Käse scenario |
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By *obajxMan
over a year ago
Cheshire |
Another lockdown and I'm wondering if anyone knows any porn sites they'd like to recommend other than:
Xvideos
PornHub
Xtube
Ass parade
Brazzers
xHamster
XNXX
YouPorn
YouJizz
TastyBlacks
HClips
TnaFlix
Tube8
Spankbang
DrTuber
Spankwire
KeezMovies
Nuvid
SunPorno
BravoTube
PornHD
Eporner
SexVid
XXXBunker
TheNewPorn
Mofosex...
PornDreamer
X18 Xbabe
UpdateTube
BeFuck
Hdmovz
PornRox
PornMaki
Pornid
Inxporn
TopFreePornVideos
Slutload
ProPorn
FakePorn
Pornhost
HandjobHub
Vpornvideos
MyXVids
Pornicom
DansMovies
Wetplace
AdultFreex
Wankflix
88fuck
Fapdu Rude
FreudBox
AdultInc
PornHeed
HdPorn
Orgasm
PornRabbit
MadThumbs
Fux Eroxia
DeviantClip
Xxvids
H2porn
ApeTube
MetaPorn
YourLustMovies
ElephantTube
Long PornerBros
Tubegalore
3movs
Ass-Time
HQButt
BangBus
BangBros
Ghetto tube
RedTube
Pornyourgold
Oneporneveryminute
Dawnporn
Pornonthecob
Only Onan
BrickHouseButts
GhettoGaggers
GloryHole
Tubegalore
As these have got boring and repetitive
Any help is much appreciated.
Thanks. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There are two guys who have been lost in the desert for weeks, and they're at death's door. As they stumble on, hoping for salvation in the form of an oasis or something similar, they suddenly spy, through the heat haze, a tree off in the distance.
As they get closer, they can see that the tree is draped with rasher upon rasher of bacon. There's smoked bacon, crispy bacon, life-giving juicy nearly-raw bacon, all sorts.
"Oh my, John," says the first bloke. "It's a bacon tree! We're saved!" "You're right!" says John.
So John goes on ahead and runs up to the tree salivating at the prospect of food. But as he gets to within five feet of the tree, there's the sound of machine gun fire, and he is shot down in a hail of bullets.
His friend quickly drops down on the sand, and calls across to the dying John.
"John, John! What on earth happened?"
With his dying breath John calls out
"It's not a Bacon Tree
It's...
It's...
It's a Ham Bush" |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"There are two guys who have been lost in the desert for weeks, and they're at death's door. As they stumble on, hoping for salvation in the form of an oasis or something similar, they suddenly spy, through the heat haze, a tree off in the distance.
As they get closer, they can see that the tree is draped with rasher upon rasher of bacon. There's smoked bacon, crispy bacon, life-giving juicy nearly-raw bacon, all sorts.
"Oh my, John," says the first bloke. "It's a bacon tree! We're saved!" "You're right!" says John.
So John goes on ahead and runs up to the tree salivating at the prospect of food. But as he gets to within five feet of the tree, there's the sound of machine gun fire, and he is shot down in a hail of bullets.
His friend quickly drops down on the sand, and calls across to the dying John.
"John, John! What on earth happened?"
With his dying breath John calls out
"It's not a Bacon Tree
It's...
It's...
It's a Ham Bush""
That’s a crackling joke |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
some good ones in there 
A man walks up to a woman in his office each day, stands very close to her, draws in a large breath of air and tells her that her hair smells nice.
After a week of this, she can’t stand it any longer, and goes to Human Resources. Without identifying the guy, she tells them what the co-worker does, and that she wants to file a sexual harassment suit against him.
The HR supervisor is puzzled by this approach, and asks, “What’s sexually threatening about a co-worker telling you your hair smells nice?”
The woman replies, “It’s Brandon, the midget! |
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By *obajxMan
over a year ago
Cheshire |
A young family moved into a house next door to an empty plot. One day, a gang of building workers turned up to start building on the plot.
The young family's 5-year-old daughter naturally took an interest in all the activity going on next door and started talking with the workers.
She hung around and eventually the builders, all with hearts of gold, more or less adopted the little girl as a sort of project mascot. They chatted with her, let her sit with them while they had tea and lunch breaks, and gave her little jobs to do here and there to make her feel important.
They even gave the child her very own hard hat and gloves, which thrilled her immensely.
At the end of the first week, the smiling builders presented her with a pay envelope - containing £10 in 50p coins. The little girl took her 'pay' home to her mother who suggested that they take the money to the bank the next day to open a savings account.
At the bank, the female cashier was tickled pink listening to the little girl telling her about her 'work' on the building site and the fact she had a 'pay packet'.
'You must have worked very hard to earn all this', said the cashier.
The little girl proudly replied, 'Yes, I worked every day with Steve and Wayne and Mike. We're building a big house.'
'My goodness gracious,' said the cashier, 'And will you be working on the house again next week?'
The child thought for a moment. Then she said seriously:
'I think so. Provided those wankers at Wickes deliver the fucking bricks on time.' |
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By *linyMan
over a year ago
Manchester/London |
"Chuck your best joke in below, make people smile on Monday
I’ve heard a rumour that lots of Germans are stockpiling cheese & sausage in the anticipation of another COVID lockdown - in other words planning for a Wurst-Käse scenario"
Any German sausage are the wurst! |
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A couple of ladies were Playing golf one of them teed off and watched in horror as her ball flew straight in to a group of 4 fellers playing the next hole.
One of the men clasped his hands together at his groin falling to the ground in agony an writhing around on the green.
The woman ran to the injured man, who was still clasping his hands in his groin area while now groaning in the fetal position, apologising and announcing she was a physio therapist she told him if he'd allowed her, she knew she could reduce the pain.
He finally allowed her to place his hands either side of his body loosened his trousers slipped her hand down to his groin and proceeded to gentle massage him. After his groans changed to gentile whimpers she asked does that feel better?
The man looked at the woman and between whimpers replied mmm thats amazing mmmm
But ahhh I still think I've broke my thumb!
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...... This is lockdown, this is lockdown
