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Cynicism and it’s delivery
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Do you find cynicism an attractive trait?
Does it depend on the delivery of such cynical statements and knowledge of the person delivering them?
Some of the greatest comic performers ever known to the world are largely based around cynicism.
I’m beginning to feel like my own personal cynicism is becoming the overwhelming trait in my perspective.
Do you think it’s healthy to see the world in this kind of light?
Should I open the third tin of Cadbury heroes this weekend?
What day is it?
Why are sweet tins now made of plastic and don’t contain anywhere near enough sweets for an afternoon let alone a week over Christmas? |
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I think it's a healthy trait, as long as it does not become too overwhelming.
You still have to be able to see and accept the large amount of good and genuine people and acts that happen in parallel with the rest.
Tempering it with humour is a good approach.
Chocolates?
Global, cultural Marxist plot! Bastards! |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
If we're talking about here then I'm with you OP - my cynicism levels are high and getting more so and I'm perfectly content with that too.
As for Heroes - they're Cadbury's so what more do you expect?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I didn’t like cynicism, probably part of my conditioning, although I saw value in scepticism. However I think a healthy dose of cynicism is useful in this world we are living in, but I am wary of overdoing it, so I balance it with trust, but again being wary of naïveté. |
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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago
West Wales |
I will add though that just occasionally my heart is lifted.
back late summer 2019 I had a call from a German chap who had broken down on his 1950's BMW a few miles away & a local garage had given him my number.
Suffice to say I let him use my facilities, we made a new clutch cable & while here we also changed the oil & fixed his intermittent headlight which he didn't notice as he only travelled during the daylight hours.
We also fed & watered him before sending him on his way.
We got a Xmas card from him this morning with £15 inside for the kids. In it was a two page letter outlining what he had done since & that he always felt guilty as I only asked for a donation to the tea fund even though he was here for about three hours in all.
He also put in a copy of his local church rag where he'd put tales of his adventures in Wales including a pic of yours truly's workshop & ugly mug 
Such a lovely gesture & totally out of the blue & unexpected. he's hoping to return in 2021 & needs to "Finish Wales" as he put it, so might see him then.
S |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I will add though that just occasionally my heart is lifted.
back late summer 2019 I had a call from a German chap who had broken down on his 1950's BMW a few miles away & a local garage had given him my number.
Suffice to say I let him use my facilities, we made a new clutch cable & while here we also changed the oil & fixed his intermittent headlight which he didn't notice as he only travelled during the daylight hours.
We also fed & watered him before sending him on his way.
We got a Xmas card from him this morning with £15 inside for the kids. In it was a two page letter outlining what he had done since & that he always felt guilty as I only asked for a donation to the tea fund even though he was here for about three hours in all.
He also put in a copy of his local church rag where he'd put tales of his adventures in Wales including a pic of yours truly's workshop & ugly mug
Such a lovely gesture & totally out of the blue & unexpected. he's hoping to return in 2021 & needs to "Finish Wales" as he put it, so might see him then.
S"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Cynicism is learn’t from experience, but there are some people who wallow in it and will piss on even the most positive of things, cause they can’t bear other people to be happy, having said that On here I think more than other places people are motivated purely by self interest, so I think it’s good thing to be cynical in this instance. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I will add though that just occasionally my heart is lifted.
back late summer 2019 I had a call from a German chap who had broken down on his 1950's BMW a few miles away & a local garage had given him my number.
Suffice to say I let him use my facilities, we made a new clutch cable & while here we also changed the oil & fixed his intermittent headlight which he didn't notice as he only travelled during the daylight hours.
We also fed & watered him before sending him on his way.
We got a Xmas card from him this morning with £15 inside for the kids. In it was a two page letter outlining what he had done since & that he always felt guilty as I only asked for a donation to the tea fund even though he was here for about three hours in all.
He also put in a copy of his local church rag where he'd put tales of his adventures in Wales including a pic of yours truly's workshop & ugly mug
Such a lovely gesture & totally out of the blue & unexpected. he's hoping to return in 2021 & needs to "Finish Wales" as he put it, so might see him then.
S"
Probably hoping to get free B&B/use of facilities for when he returns  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Cynicism is learn’t from experience, but there are some people who wallow in it and will piss on even the most positive of things, cause they can’t bear other people to be happy, having said that On here I think more than other places people are motivated purely by self interest, so I think it’s good thing to be cynical in this instance. "
I agree with this. I think you can be quietly cynical to protect yourself, without being a buzzkill. Sometimes people just act like surly, eyerolly teenagers under the guise of being cynical and wise. |
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"Cynicism is learn’t from experience, but there are some people who wallow in it and will piss on even the most positive of things, cause they can’t bear other people to be happy, having said that On here I think more than other places people are motivated purely by self interest, so I think it’s good thing to be cynical in this instance.
I agree with this. I think you can be quietly cynical to protect yourself, without being a buzzkill. Sometimes people just act like surly, eyerolly teenagers under the guise of being cynical and wise."
Very much agree with this and younlearn it yourself from past experiences dealing with this kind of person too.
If there is too much drama and they male out everyone is out to get them then you have to wonder why. |
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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
South Wales |
I think when the healthy cynicism turns into bitterness then that’s when it’s time to have a word with yourself.
I would hope I’m not like that. But if you were bitter would you realise you were bitter?
Navel gazing alert! |
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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago
West Wales |
"I will add though that just occasionally my heart is lifted.
back late summer 2019 I had a call from a German chap who had broken down on his 1950's BMW a few miles away & a local garage had given him my number.
Suffice to say I let him use my facilities, we made a new clutch cable & while here we also changed the oil & fixed his intermittent headlight which he didn't notice as he only travelled during the daylight hours.
We also fed & watered him before sending him on his way.
We got a Xmas card from him this morning with £15 inside for the kids. In it was a two page letter outlining what he had done since & that he always felt guilty as I only asked for a donation to the tea fund even though he was here for about three hours in all.
He also put in a copy of his local church rag where he'd put tales of his adventures in Wales including a pic of yours truly's workshop & ugly mug
Such a lovely gesture & totally out of the blue & unexpected. he's hoping to return in 2021 & needs to "Finish Wales" as he put it, so might see him then.
S
Probably hoping to get free B&B/use of facilities for when he returns "
My inner cynic did think that at first, but then in his letter it said "if route & time allow"
All credit to him though, he spends three weeks travelling Europe almost every year on a 1950's 250cc single cylinder R26 BMW with it's happy cruising speed of about 50-55mph all loaded up.
I struggle some days on my modern BMW with it's heated this that & the other, full fairing & cruise control!
S |
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"I will add though that just occasionally my heart is lifted.
back late summer 2019 I had a call from a German chap who had broken down on his 1950's BMW a few miles away & a local garage had given him my number.
Suffice to say I let him use my facilities, we made a new clutch cable & while here we also changed the oil & fixed his intermittent headlight which he didn't notice as he only travelled during the daylight hours.
We also fed & watered him before sending him on his way.
We got a Xmas card from him this morning with £15 inside for the kids. In it was a two page letter outlining what he had done since & that he always felt guilty as I only asked for a donation to the tea fund even though he was here for about three hours in all.
He also put in a copy of his local church rag where he'd put tales of his adventures in Wales including a pic of yours truly's workshop & ugly mug
Such a lovely gesture & totally out of the blue & unexpected. he's hoping to return in 2021 & needs to "Finish Wales" as he put it, so might see him then.
S"
That's cool. I remember as a kid my Mum and Dad did the same for a Dutch couple doing a tour (but not getting very far).
Up until a couple of Xmases ago, they were still getting cards from them.
(I have an R51-2) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I do see why some are cynical, and on here espescially.
However I am not.
I cannot stand selfishness so always look for the good in people, sometimes it backfires and theres no saving some, but for my own sanity I prefer to think theres a selfless, caring and generous side to most people. Alot do do things from the goodness of their heart and not just self interest x
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think when the healthy cynicism turns into bitterness then that’s when it’s time to have a word with yourself.
I would hope I’m not like that. But if you were bitter would you realise you were bitter?
Navel gazing alert!"
I Googled and found 10 signs of a bitter person. I tick them all.  |
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"I think when the healthy cynicism turns into bitterness then that’s when it’s time to have a word with yourself.
I would hope I’m not like that. But if you were bitter would you realise you were bitter?
Navel gazing alert!
I Googled and found 10 signs of a bitter person. I tick them all.
"
I ticked all 10,then added a couple of extras... |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
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I find a certain degree of cynicism attractive, yes. I enjoy the sarcastic wit that often couples with it, the realistic view of the world that's not clouded with glitter, twirling and rainbow dust. It's also the juxtaposition between my daft, overtrusting nature that's attractive as well.
I think Luna's right - sometimes the cynicism can cross over into bitterness and that's not particularly healthy is it? Keeping the faith in people, trust and not giving up on others is important I think. On here, it's best to read most of it with a pinch of salt, especially on the fora. Don't give up on people.
As far as opening another Cadburys tin goes, of course you should. Treat yo'self Sam, it's Christmas time.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Some interesting points made so far.
I do think bitter cynicism is easy to spot and I’m reasonably confident that this isn’t my stance yet.
But then as someone said earlier... do bitter people realise they are and come across so??
Keep posting your thoughts people.
I have eaten all the cream egg ones and most of the eclairs.
Lots of twirl left. |
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I prefer the term "realist" myself. I hope for nice things to happen, but experience teaches you differently.
However, I'm joyfully sarcastic in the retelling of said disappointments, so definitely NOT a buzz-kill. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can we still call them tins if they are made of plastic 
Arent they now tubs? Tins were called tins because they were made of tin which also caused food poisoning if not coated inside properly."
A tin tin well I never |
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"Can we still call them tins if they are made of plastic
Arent they now tubs? Tins were called tins because they were made of tin which also caused food poisoning if not coated inside properly.
A tin tin well I never "
A tin tin....and it was something like 20 years after that the first tin opener was invented.....my head is so full of crap hahhaha |
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Your past can also have a huge effect on your levels of cynicism depending on what you have been through.
I know I can have a skewed view of what people do thats quite normal and get my take on it very wrong indeed sometimes but I'm learning and getting better with it....I do still royally fuck up though and don't like that about myself. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can we still call them tins if they are made of plastic
Arent they now tubs? Tins were called tins because they were made of tin which also caused food poisoning if not coated inside properly.
A tin tin well I never
A tin tin....and it was something like 20 years after that the first tin opener was invented.....my head is so full of crap hahhaha"
Its a good job tin food was made to last then, thats a Long time to wait for a bowl of pear quarters. |
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Many personality traits can be interesting, attractive or annoying - it often depends on the context, like most things. It's healthy to be able to take many perspectives on things, rather than having a rigidity. Typically flexibility will let us understand things more deeply than having the opposite.
Are pessimists views worse or better than optimists? They both have value and cynicism may seem occasionally like aspects of pessimisn.
I like fairly well rounded people to spend a lot of time with, people who have curiosity about things and wisdom. Typically we build trust with others but that may be harder to do with someone who wants to be cynical about you - it's an antithesis of trust really, if someone will continue to be cynical of your motives - ultimately if people invest in you but you return their investment with a rigid cynicism, it's likely to be corrosive to the relationship. People will sense it, even with little said and will probably feel repelled by you.
If your cynicism gets what you want in life, you are fully satisfied and your objectives are met, it may have helped you to achieve them. I'd be questionning of such a person. They probably wouldn't be right for me, though they may have tremendous relationships. I'd probably feel short changed by someone behaving that way - that may be an aspect of what they want to achieve, of course. I generally don't appreciate game playing from people and would call out anything that seemed to be likely to hurt me. |
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I can be a tad cynical and this year has really brought out the Victor Meldrew grumpy old woman mode within me 
