FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Give me your best insults...

Give me your best insults...

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

No reason, just because.

I’ll start:

Jizzpixie

Cock womble

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Knob-jockey

Spunk-guzzler

Wank-pheasant

Or the classic... Cunt!

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By *ob Carpe DiemMan over a year ago

Torquay

"No reason, just because.

I’ll start:

Jizzpixie

Cock womble "

Cock Womble was Uncle Bulgaria's porn star cousin

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By *naswingdressWoman over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Insults or insulting names?

I'm a fan of "I'm glad you think highly of yourself, someone has to"

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By *andyfloss2000Woman over a year ago

ashford

Fucktard is my fave of the day I said it most of way home from work this morn! Ha ha x

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By *wist my nipplesCouple over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly

Bawbag.

Dobber.

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By *emorefridaCouple over a year ago

La la land

My absolute favourite

Fel rhech mewn pot jam

Translates into as much use as a fart in a jam jar

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Cunty-bollox

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By *iddlesticksMan over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

Wassock

I’m on the edge I am.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

This is very popular in West Wales.... Love it!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It's not rude but calling someone a doughnut is always a good one

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"It's not rude but calling someone a doughnut is always a good one

We use this as a sledge in cricket towards a batsman. All edges no middle

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Insults or insulting names?

I'm a fan of "I'm glad you think highly of yourself, someone has to""

Haha

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Tory

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"My absolute favourite

Fel rhech mewn pot jam

Translates into as much use as a fart in a jam jar

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By *iddlesticksMan over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

If I had a face like that I’d stand on my hands and teach my arse to speak.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Wank badger

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Another good one is... your nothing but a cum stain on the bed sheet of life

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By *ntrepid ExplorersCouple over a year ago

Birmingham

Twunt always does well for me

And I don't want to be accused of cultural appropriate, I love hearing bawbag from them up north.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Knob jockey or shortened to knob jock

Bell sniffer

Knob cheese

Wankstain

Berk

Berkules (as in Hercules)

Flam funneller

Pleb

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By *ang bang bangity bangCouple over a year ago

Sunderland

Four Irish ones that always have a nice ring to them

Amadan - just means fool. But it rolls off the tongue

Gobshite - does exactly what it says on the tin

Yoke - ie she's an awful yoke. Also useful if you can't think of the name of something

Cute hoor - not an attractive lady of negotiable affection but a shrewd or sneaky person.

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By *orraine999Woman over a year ago

Somewhere

"Insults or insulting names?

I'm a fan of "I'm glad you think highly of yourself, someone has to""

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By *rincess peachWoman over a year ago

shits creek

Grade A cunt.

I like cunts of many varieties, however if you're a "grade A cunt" then we got problems.

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By *uke olovingmanMan over a year ago

Gravesend

I'm a big fan of the best bit of you dripped down your mother's leg...

Your mum would have done the world a favour if she swallowed

Handy for Indian scam calls

Ben chode...sister fucker

Muta chode...mother fucker

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By *azkinsWoman over a year ago

leeds

Norbert is my insult of the moment.

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By *ob Carpe DiemMan over a year ago

Torquay

You're about as original as Trigger's broom

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By *aomilatteCouple over a year ago

Midlands

Teeth like piano keys

Face like a bulldog chewing a wasp

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I can see Mr n Mrs smack from botty land are on their way to vacation on this thread love it.

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By *iddlesticksMan over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

Give your mouth a day off.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Swamp donkey?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Crettin

Bum bead

Rubber nut

Your a chromosome off of being down syndrome. (not very pc) but a personal fave.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Give your mouth a day off. "

Oh do grow up!

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By *ang bang bangity bangCouple over a year ago

Sunderland

"Swamp donkey? "

One of my all time favourites

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

A few pork pies short of a picnic

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By *iddlesticksMan over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

If brains were snot you couldn’t blow your nose.

If brains were dynamite you couldn’t blow your hat off.

What does the village do for an idiot on your day off.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Trump supporter!

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By *rincess peachWoman over a year ago

shits creek

Some bint that thinks she's all special and others below her in terms of appearance and offerings to the male species = Clinkerbell

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By *sturjackMan over a year ago

Edinburgh

Fuckwit! is one of my favourites

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By *igmaMan over a year ago

Yorkshire

I’m big into Arsehole

...atm

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By *uriousVoyeurMan over a year ago

Northside

You're such a cunt that when you were born the doctor slapped your mother!

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By *iamondCougarWoman over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

"Grade A cunt.

I like cunts of many varieties, however if you're a "grade A cunt" then we got problems."

I like that

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By *aughty in TamworthMan over a year ago

Tamworth

You are such a cunt that if you entered an completion to find the world's biggest cunt , you would lose because you are such as cunt

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Crettin

Bum bead

Rubber nut

Your a chromosome off of being down syndrome. (not very pc) but a personal fave.

That last insult doesn't even make sense... It's caused by having an extra chromosome... So what you are saying is that a person is 'normal'.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

A few of my favourites are:

Spaffbadger

Shitgibbon

You are a throbbing pustule on the rectum of humanity.

You have delusions of adequacy.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Fuckwit! is one of my favourites"

I must admit, I do love this one.

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By *aughty in TamworthMan over a year ago

Tamworth

If I throw a stick will you go away?

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By *uke olovingmanMan over a year ago

Gravesend

Trump

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"A few of my favourites are:

Spaffbadger

Shitgibbon

You are a throbbing pustule on the rectum of humanity.

You have delusions of adequacy.

You know you’re the king and my dictionary of the worlds best insults.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I can't you're hot as fuck

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Your so old looking you're arse hit the ground and decided to stay there

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By *beefMan over a year ago

Long eaton

you should of been a cum stain on the back seat of your dads cortina lol

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By *asonA1969Man over a year ago

Gateshead

Someone who has never had sex with more than one person in the room

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By *uke olovingmanMan over a year ago

Gravesend

Overweight

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By *tella HeelsTV/TS over a year ago

west here ford shire

Slobber snuggler

Chunky funky monkey

Kitchen cutlery you

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By *eb77Man over a year ago

Bedfordshire

Cock-juggling thundercunt

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By *eb77Man over a year ago

Bedfordshire

"Teeth like piano keys

Face like a bulldog chewing a wasp"

Face like a bulldog chewing a wasp, while licking piss off a nettle

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I can't you're hot as fuck

Go onnn, hit me with your best insult

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"No reason, just because.

I’ll start:

Jizzpixie

Cock womble "

You are so ugly, when you were born the nurse handed your mum the placenta by mistake.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"No reason, just because.

I’ll start:

Jizzpixie

Cock womble

You are so ugly, when you were born the nurse handed your mum the placenta by mistake. "

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

U stupid Mistake of a human

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By *aomilatteCouple over a year ago

Midlands

You've got the body of a God...

Buddha

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By *iddlesticksMan over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

You’ve a face only a mother could love.

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By *_DirectorMan over a year ago

Middle of somewhere

Hit every branch of the ugly tree on the way down .....then landed on a trampoline

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By *aomilatteCouple over a year ago

Midlands

You're so old, when you were at school there was no History.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Best part of you got wiped on the curtain

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Face like a welders bench

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Twunt a cross between a twat and a cunt

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Bearded piece of after birth

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Social media influencer

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Social media influencer "

We have a winner!!!

‘Cockslot’ is my go-to insult.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Social media influencer "

Ha haa! Yes! "Twat with pretend-job" is another phrase for that, I believe.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Meantime... I would challenge you to a battle of wits, but I see you are unarmed...

It appears this is frequently misattributed to Shakespeare.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Meantime... I would challenge you to a battle of wits, but I see you are unarmed...

It appears this is frequently misattributed to Shakespeare.

I LOVE this one

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Smeggy thugpiece

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I always liked after bein insulted about my weight "I'm only fat cos every time I fuck Ur mother she gives me a chocolate biscuit!"

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By *assing Fancies xCouple over a year ago

Sherwood Forest

Gruffalo jigga pig

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Never got to use it but I did hear friend say "if u wanna fight stick Ur head up my ass & fight for breath!"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If you had an iq one point higher you’d be a vegetable

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Anyone remember game on? Classic on there from Matt skunkpussies & jizzemmonkeys

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"You've got the body of a God...

Buddha"
wot did I do?

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By *rHotNottsMan over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

Don’t really have many , prefer to call people nice fluffy names

But for the nasty ones that cross me, usually at work, twat, bit of a cunt, total fucking cunt

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By *ex HolesMan over a year ago

Up North

Bell End

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Dear God, thousands of sperm and that one won!

You sir, have the visage of the facially inept, the body of a slug and the mind of a cabbage.

Madam you are a waste of skin, a thief of joy and oxygen.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

7 billion years of evolution and we end up with you!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

youve had more swords than an errol flynn

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

youve so fat your arse has two post codes and yodel are refusing to deliver to both

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By *ex HolesMan over a year ago

Up North

Your chin’s bashed more balls than Ian Botham’s bat

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Meantime... I would challenge you to a battle of wits, but I see you are unarmed...

It appears this is frequently misattributed to Shakespeare.

I wish I could claim it as mine!

I LOVE this one "

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By *ichi_acerMan over a year ago

notts

King of the dribblers

Dumbfuckery

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By *orny PTMan over a year ago

Peterborough

Pissy-knickered-cock-sucker.

Got that one from VIZ

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By *uke olovingmanMan over a year ago

Gravesend

"No reason, just because.

I’ll start:

Jizzpixie

Cock womble

You are so ugly, when you were born the nurse handed your mum the placenta by mistake.

You're so ugly the nurse slapped your father

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By *orny PTMan over a year ago

Peterborough

"No reason, just because.

I’ll start:

Jizzpixie

Cock womble

You are so ugly, when you were born the nurse handed your mum the placenta by mistake.

You're so ugly the nurse slapped your father"

You're so ugly that, when you were breastfed, the milk turned into yoghurt.

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By *uesswho2Man over a year ago

Stockton

Spunk bubble or spunk stain

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By *uper SaiyanMan over a year ago

Birmingham

A million sperm.... and you were the fastest...

Oxygen thief!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Spunk bubble

Gobshite

How can someone be so thick with just one head

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Pussy pow wow

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By *aomilatteCouple over a year ago

Midlands

You won second prize in a Beauty contest collect £15?

Who came first, Shrek?

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By *orny PTMan over a year ago

Peterborough

Snowflake

Instagrammer.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You're as bright as midnight in a tunnel.

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By *aomilatteCouple over a year ago

Midlands

Her hair looked like she'd been through a car wash.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Bright as a blackout

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By *orny PTMan over a year ago

Peterborough

Thick as pig shit.

T.A.P.S.

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By *uper SaiyanMan over a year ago

Birmingham

See you next Tuesday

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Your a berk

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By *eavenNhellCouple over a year ago

carrbrook stalybridge

decrepit piece of bell end cheddar

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"decrepit piece of bell end cheddar "

They sell that in Asda

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"decrepit piece of bell end cheddar

They sell that in Asda

Twonk.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"decrepit piece of bell end cheddar

They sell that in Asda

Twonk."

Lol popps thats a compliment

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By *in82Man over a year ago

Nottingham

"decrepit piece of bell end cheddar

They sell that in Asda

Twonk."

I love twonk. Great insult, friendly but harsh.

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By *andVCouple over a year ago

Doncaster

Lanky streak of piss, don't know why or were I heard it but since then anybody who I need to insult who is even the tiniest bit taller than me gets called it lol

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By *arpePinguisWoman over a year ago

Norwich

I have neither the patience nor the crayons to explain this to you

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By *in82Man over a year ago

Nottingham

"I have neither the patience nor the crayons to explain this to you"

Ha ha ha. Love that. X

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By *rishcowboy36Man over a year ago

dundalk

Your like a crow looking into a bottle

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By *azkinsWoman over a year ago

leeds

Your only here cos your mother slept in someone else's wet patch.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You’re mother was a snowblower.

Name the film

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By *uke olovingmanMan over a year ago

Gravesend

Berkshire Hunt

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By *eece38Man over a year ago

bangor

You remind me of a penny two faced and not worth much !

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By *orny PTMan over a year ago

Peterborough

"You remind me of a penny two faced and not worth much !"
That's a bit rich! I'd've gone for Farthing, as that's worth a quarter of a penny.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Tablet

Muppet

Mong

Fanny like a punched lasagne

Spoon

Exciting personality like a plank

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By *oodlandCoupleCouple over a year ago

Derbyshire

Chode

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I have neither the patience nor the crayons to explain this to you"

This is my favourite

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I have neither the patience nor the crayons to explain this to you"

I'm liking this, ok if it gets recycled.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel.

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By *hunky GentMan over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

OP - you're a very naughty girl.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Go take your face for a shit

I would rather shit in my hand and clap

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If you're here then that means that there's a village somewhere missing it's idiot.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple over a year ago

North West

"If you're here then that means that there's a village somewhere missing it's idiot. "

Which village are you from, Lorenzo?

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By *atin savantTV/TS over a year ago

Bournemouth

You disgust me. I bet when you were born you came out licking!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Fanny baws!!

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By *andVCouple over a year ago

Doncaster

Haha just literally seen the best insult ever direct quote "mutton shutters like a dropkicked trifle" lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Trouduc

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Clunge bubble

Piers Morgan

Cum sponge

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By *2000ManMan over a year ago

Worthing

Just ignoring someone if they write or say anything to you which is out of order.

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By *aomilatteCouple over a year ago

Midlands

What’s your favourite machine at the gym, the fucking vending machine?

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By *iddlesticksMan over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

Are your brain and your mouth socially distancing.

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By *iddlesticksMan over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

Face like a smashed crab.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Face like a smashed crab. "

Just laughed out loud

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Looks like someone has set fire to your face and put it out with the back of a frying pan...

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By *otSoPoshWoman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Are your brain and your mouth socially distancing. "

Made me ch*ke on my coffee

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Are your brain and your mouth socially distancing.

Made me ch*ke on my coffee

Makes a nice change from you ch*king on cock!

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By *lirty_dirtyCouple over a year ago

Lingfield

Festering bag of monkey spunk

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Doctor at your cervix.

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By *aul happyMan over a year ago

tilgate crawley

ffs your an arsenal supporter

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By *he AmbassadorMan over a year ago

IRLANDA. / Prague. / Cil Dara

YOU KNOW THE BEST PART OF YOU RAN DOWN YOUR MOTHER'S INNER LEG AND INTO AN EGG CUP,

Now be prepared to duck and come up swinging,

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"No reason, just because.

I’ll start:

Jizzpixie

Cock womble "

Your boring

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By *lertypetMan over a year ago

north west

Me- have you got a pen?

You- goes to get a pen

me- have you got a pen then?

You- yes I’ve got a pen

Me- well I think you should get back there before the farmer notice’s your missing ! Lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"No reason, just because.

I’ll start:

Jizzpixie

Cock womble "

You and your mum support West Ham Utd!!!!

I know I know I’m sorry but you asked for it.

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