FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Profile vs Personality
Profile vs Personality
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Do you think our profiles can fully convey our personalities?
Like, have you ever gotten to know someone and been surprised by the way they initially conveyed themselves? For example, someone articulate and intelligent with bags of personality having a blank "fill in later" and close-up dick pics only type profile?
I think my bio and photos represent me pretty accurately, but then I did take the time and effort to ensure they do. Maybe some people just don't care as much I do lol. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've been told my profile is pretty spot on when I've met someone. It's been re written a few times when what I'm looking has changed but I try to keep it as accurate to my personality as possible.
I have met/spoken to a couple of different people with pretty pants profiles who are the nicest people ever and just haven't got round to doing anything with their profiles. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A bit. I think the most we ever see is an online persona until we meet in person. For some the online persona is closer to the ‘in the flesh’ personality than others. |
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Ours currently says nothing at all. Pulled it down with lockdown as I wanted to make it clear as I'm not blinking meeting. Though the profile wording is Ms so it's probably a bit different to my forum presence |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
Until about 6 weeks ago my profile was the grand total of this:
...
And I had it for the whole of my previous profile as well, which was about 18 months immediately before this one.
I find profiles interesting to read but I tend to pay more attention to forum posts, messages and pictures to decide if I want to talk to someone, as I don't think you can get a full sense of someone from a snapshot paragraph or several. |
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I rewrote a previous profile numerous times to try and portray myself as someone that people might be interested in meeting but I didn't recognise myself so when I created this one I took the time to give people the best image of the real me.
I believe it reflects who I am and why I'm here and if that catches someone's eye then it's a good starting point.
My pics and bio are consistent with my personality and hopefully that is reflected in how I conduct myself in the forums. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have a Word document with all my various incarnations of profile text.
It's a really handy way of keeping/changing your text from time to time depending on which way the winds blowing |
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We gave up a long time ago using fab for arranging meets, mainly because we realised a profile doesn’t give us a true indication of how a person really is. We much prefer to meet others at parties or holidays face to face, it’s the only way to get chemistry for us. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think my bio and pictures represent me how I want them too quite accurately and the people I’ve met have never been shocked as if they were expecting different so I would say that I do come across as what you see  x
I agree with Sparkles I have met a few people that I suppose were even better in real than what their profile was - “I have met/spoken to a couple of different people with pretty pants profiles who are the nicest people ever and just haven't got round to doing anything with their profiles.”  x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have taken time to write my profile, and I do tweet it from time to time. I don't want to rely on visuals, as for me there is more to someone than looks, and in my case if it was looks and looks alone I don't think I'd be "competitive".
So in my profile, I try to give the reader an insight into "me", the type of things I like, that appeal, and interest me in other people. I'm fortunate in as much as those I've met haven't been disappointed, by which I mean I didn't give them false ideas as to the real me, so I guess I must be doing something right. |
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Don't think few pictures, bio and a few boxes ticked can tell the whole story about any of us .
People I met usually resemble the base from their profiles and then some .
Mine definitely needs and update at this stage , been a while since bio was updated.
How similar the profile is to my personality ?
I'd like to think it's quite close , but best let's ask Sparkles.
Come on Bubble , is my profile "Me"? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Your profile is what you think you are yet someone may judge you differently based on personality or behaviour.
For example The profile that states if you’re easily offended you won’t like them and then tell you off and block you as they were offended by a message. Ain’t nowt as queer as folk |
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I don’t think mine represents my personality at all, I like to think I’m much warmer in reality. Hopefully it comes across intelligently and direct though as I don’t want to waste anyone’s time or my own.
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
I don't think you can truly reflect your personality in a few words you write about yourself, give a "flavour" of it perhaps, but without interacting with someone and slowly building a picture of them (for better or worse) you can't really grasp all sides of a personality, either on here or in person, and even then you only see the picture that's before you at that moment in time - it's an evolving thing that you rarely truly and completely *know* someone.
Even after years of knowing them there may be sides you've not seen before in some cases. |
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"Our profile attempts to capture, just how serious and boring we are. It's a tough job, but you have to try don't you. "
Pole fitness/ Calisthenics is definitely not a boring choice of staying in shape.
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
I'm a firm believer that profiles rarely show someone completely accurately - nor should they.
This isn't a dating site designed to form long term relationships. It's not a place where you're completing a CV in as much detail as possible to get a job. It's not a place where intimate personal info needs to be shared.
All a profile needs to do is give someone an insight into your personality via the text and an idea of what you look like in the pictures.
Sure - info on likes and dislikes is handy along with preferences and non-negotiables - but that's all it really takes to give someone enough of a clue to decide whether to contact or meet.
People will always put stuff in profiles that they think will appeal to rather than put off folk, even if it's not always a 100% reflection of their true personality. It's human nature. Sometimes people exaggerate. Sometimes people omit things. Like it or not for many it's perceived as 'survival of the fittest' in the world of Internet contact sites.
So what you see online isn't always the real person, but what they want you to see.
Cynical maybe. But I suspect more common than many will admit to.
A |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
"
Cynical maybe. But I suspect more common than many will admit to.
A"
Not in the slightest bit cynical - is my thoughts exactly - it's no different to posting pics that are angled for just that right look, just done with words |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"
Cynical maybe. But I suspect more common than many will admit to.
A
Not in the slightest bit cynical - is my thoughts exactly - it's no different to posting pics that are angled for just that right look, just done with words "
People do that? 
So all those huge knobs aren't real?
Say it isn't so.  
A |
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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
Profiles and photos are marketing gimmicks.
Some will better reflect who a person is or what they are about, others less so.
I doubt ours gives an accurate representation of who we are despite what we post, as people will form their own opinions based on what they want. |
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One can never have the perfect profile. Mine is always in flux for example. Sometimes i think of something bright and i add it on, other times i take something out because it sounds stupid when i read it out loud lol
There for no is the answer OP, out profiles will never match who we really are |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
"
Cynical maybe. But I suspect more common than many will admit to.
A
Not in the slightest bit cynical - is my thoughts exactly - it's no different to posting pics that are angled for just that right look, just done with words
People do that?
So all those huge knobs aren't real?
Say it isn't so.
A"
They might be real...whether they belong to the poster however
Gemini Man..shattering illusions since 2016!! |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
Apparently I am less headmistress-y than my profile and forum posts.
Apparently, I am more headmistress-y than my profile and forum posts.
I look like my flattering pictures because everyone is looking down and just seeing cleavage. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm a firm believer that profiles rarely show someone completely accurately - nor should they.
This isn't a dating site designed to form long term relationships. It's not a place where you're completing a CV in as much detail as possible to get a job. It's not a place where intimate personal info needs to be shared.
All a profile needs to do is give someone an insight into your personality via the text and an idea of what you look like in the pictures.
Sure - info on likes and dislikes is handy along with preferences and non-negotiables - but that's all it really takes to give someone enough of a clue to decide whether to contact or meet.
People will always put stuff in profiles that they think will appeal to rather than put off folk, even if it's not always a 100% reflection of their true personality. It's human nature. Sometimes people exaggerate. Sometimes people omit things. Like it or not for many it's perceived as 'survival of the fittest' in the world of Internet contact sites.
So what you see online isn't always the real person, but what they want you to see.
Cynical maybe. But I suspect more common than many will admit to.
A"
I agree with all of this except m, that it is a cynical view. I think it is a grounded realistic view of the site and only reflective of informative profiles. Although you may get a good sense of a person who just says ‘Will fill in later’ and it’s still in their profile five years later.
I also disagree about having a profile designed to put people off, my pre-pandemic profile text was deliberately designed to do that |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Apparently I am less headmistress-y than my profile and forum posts.
Apparently, I am more headmistress-y than my profile and forum posts.
I look like my flattering pictures because everyone is looking down and just seeing cleavage. "
You're not headmistress-y at all
You're everything I expected and more
And later |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Apparently I am less headmistress-y than my profile and forum posts.
Apparently, I am more headmistress-y than my profile and forum posts.
I look like my flattering pictures because everyone is looking down and just seeing cleavage.
You're not headmistress-y at all
You're everything I expected and more
And later "
So much later. It only took 6 years and 4 hours.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think mine gives a hint of what I’m like, but is not a true reflection of me. I’m much deeper than a few sentences written on a swinging site, but it’s adequate for what is needed on here. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Apparently I am less headmistress-y than my profile and forum posts.
Apparently, I am more headmistress-y than my profile and forum posts.
I look like my flattering pictures because everyone is looking down and just seeing cleavage.
You're not headmistress-y at all
You're everything I expected and more
And later
So much later. It only took 6 years and 4 hours.
"
They now deliver nationwide
https://www.greenhalghs.com/checkout/
|
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Apparently I am less headmistress-y than my profile and forum posts.
Apparently, I am more headmistress-y than my profile and forum posts.
I look like my flattering pictures because everyone is looking down and just seeing cleavage.
You're not headmistress-y at all
You're everything I expected and more
And later
So much later. It only took 6 years and 4 hours.
They now deliver nationwide
https://www.greenhalghs.com/checkout/
"
Thank you! I'll have a look. |
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I've tried to show my personality in my pics and profile...not sure if it is perceived in the way I mean it to be though
I just like people to know I'm not all serious and it is literally what you see is what you get with me |
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Well I consider myself an articulate and polite sort. I would feel that's expressed in RL. What's the point in conveying yourself as something your not on such a forum, if in the hopes of meeting like-minded folk |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think mine says what im looking for and if I get messages from people who I'm interested in I will open up more.
Probably why I don't get many messages, oh well life goes on |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Nah, I think my profile is very by the numbers. It's not gonna offend anyone but it doesn't exactly scream "Wow!"
I can't fit my entire personality into a profile bio either so it's probably why I get more interactions from the forum than from my profile alone  |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"Apparently I am less headmistress-y than my profile and forum posts.
Apparently, I am more headmistress-y than my profile and forum posts.
I look like my flattering pictures because everyone is looking down and just seeing cleavage. "
Height has it's advantages. 
As does a diminutive stature when you're the official 'weights and measures' service at a social.... 
A |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Apparently I am less headmistress-y than my profile and forum posts.
Apparently, I am more headmistress-y than my profile and forum posts.
I look like my flattering pictures because everyone is looking down and just seeing cleavage.
Height has it's advantages.
As does a diminutive stature when you're the official 'weights and measures' service at a social....
A"
Your mankini was epic! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Apparently I am less headmistress-y than my profile and forum posts.
Apparently, I am more headmistress-y than my profile and forum posts.
I look like my flattering pictures because everyone is looking down and just seeing cleavage.
You're not headmistress-y at all
You're everything I expected and more
And later
So much later. It only took 6 years and 4 hours.
"
I was/ am ridiculously happy that you two finally met.   |
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"Do you think our profiles can fully convey our personalities?
Like, have you ever gotten to know someone and been surprised by the way they initially conveyed themselves?
"
Firstly, I have no desire to get to know someone with unlimited dick pics, regardless of how appealing their profile was.
Hopefully my profile/pictures convey my ‘delicious’ personality |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not sure a few paragraphs online can ever reflect how complex people are. The thought that that's all a person may be doesn't really fit with our inherent humanity the capacity to change and evolve or that inner voice that we often do not share with anyone but ourselves.
My profile, its old, long, and not changed for a long time.... only others can decide if it reflects what they do or don't see of me.
Wanders back into the quiet of the cave |
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Not sure what mine says about me when its on show but it does get me the attention of guys im interested in.
What makes me laugh is when someone comes into the forums thats miserable and argumentative and you look at their profile and it says fun and laid back |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Apparently I am less headmistress-y than my profile and forum posts.
Apparently, I am more headmistress-y than my profile and forum posts.
I look like my flattering pictures because everyone is looking down and just seeing cleavage.
Height has it's advantages.
As does a diminutive stature when you're the official 'weights and measures' service at a social....
A"
That's the social that just keeps giving. That invaluable service comes to mind, from time to time, and I can remember each of the items weighed and measured.  Seven years on, some of the dimensions may have changed.
It's also where I met the wonderful photographer that makes me like photos of myself. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Do you think our profiles can fully convey our personalities?
Like, have you ever gotten to know someone and been surprised by the way they initially conveyed themselves? For example, someone articulate and intelligent with bags of personality having a blank "fill in later" and close-up dick pics only type profile?
I think my bio and photos represent me pretty accurately, but then I did take the time and effort to ensure they do. Maybe some people just don't care as much I do lol. "
I think some ppl can't be bothered to fill them in tbh, some ppl are pretty private and reserved. I've been told quite a few times that my profile is far to in depth for a swingers site, but I've always been a person to share a lot of who I am. |
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I wrote mine quite quickly after being being here for a week or so scoping this place out. I think about updating it but when I read it over I find myself nodding along thinking yep, yep as what I'm looking for still stands. Although I used the word 'connections' about 4 times in a rather short write-up.. needs a edit for sure! Also said I'm not interested in sex talk as a deterrent but of course that did not work so I doubt many have actually read my profile or maybe views this as a challenge
Someone once said I come across as a knob on my profile.. I hope thats not the case!  |
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