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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Guys: Do you like to chase women?
Ladies: Do you like guys to chase after you?
I'll be honest a big turn off for me, is when a women plays hard to get. Before I invest in any type of relationship I need to know on some level that she likes me in a romantic way. It could just be my looks, however if i can't gauge that, I honestly wouldn't be interested in the young lady. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't actively chase anyone
I don't understand the thrill of it
Most meets here have progressed from some chat and banter
I'm not into coo'ing over people either
It also strikes me as false and full of loaded intent
A means to an end as it were
Anyone who expects me to work for their affections will be left short changed |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I hate being chased! Just feels overwhelming or like pressure and makes me dislike the person. I feel like the harder the chase the faster the disappearance after that man has got what he wants.
I like to have the opportunity to express my passion for a man rather than it being one sided. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If you don't get even the smallest bit of thrill from the chase then you can't have a romantic bone in your body. Don't see why it's got to be gendered either..."
I'm very romantic but I don't like putting out if I don't even know if the person likes me or not.
For instance if I send someone a txt and they don't reply hardly likely you're going to get another text from me. On fab it's even worse, if you don't reply to my opening msg (which is a nice Greeting msg with a face pic) I wouldn't send another one.
I'll give a woman the moon and the stars but I have to at the very least know she's attracted to me. |
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By *ljamMan
over a year ago
Edinburgh |
"If you don't get even the smallest bit of thrill from the chase then you can't have a romantic bone in your body. Don't see why it's got to be gendered either...
I'm very romantic but I don't like putting out if I don't even know if the person likes me or not.
For instance if I send someone a txt and they don't reply hardly likely you're going to get another text from me. On fab it's even worse, if you don't reply to my opening msg (which is a nice Greeting msg with a face pic) I wouldn't send another one.
I'll give a woman the moon and the stars but I have to at the very least know she's attracted to me."
There's a line between the chase and low-level harassment.
I see the chase as the engagement leading up to anything happening, when you feel there's probably some mutual attraction there and you enter into that courtship dance. It's a bit of fun. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If you don't get even the smallest bit of thrill from the chase then you can't have a romantic bone in your body. Don't see why it's got to be gendered either...
I'm very romantic but I don't like putting out if I don't even know if the person likes me or not.
For instance if I send someone a txt and they don't reply hardly likely you're going to get another text from me. On fab it's even worse, if you don't reply to my opening msg (which is a nice Greeting msg with a face pic) I wouldn't send another one.
I'll give a woman the moon and the stars but I have to at the very least know she's attracted to me.
There's a line between the chase and low-level harassment.
I see the chase as the engagement leading up to anything happening, when you feel there's probably some mutual attraction there and you enter into that courtship dance. It's a bit of fun. "
For me though my time is precious so I'd prefer to dedicate it to someone who I know is interested in me than me having to figure it out. I don't pressure women for sex, I do flowers on the first date, I'm polite and respectful always, however I just don't like the concept of me having to win someone over. If you don't like me when you first meet me that's ok.
I genuinely think that's how some guys end up getting used by women because you're giving a woman way too much power when you've only just met her. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you don't get even the smallest bit of thrill from the chase then you can't have a romantic bone in your body. Don't see why it's got to be gendered either..."
There's no thrill in it for me
It's nice to get to know people, recognise shared values, interests and an attraction
However, I like it to feel fluid, natural and in no way forced
As soon as it feels deliberate and pointedly sexual, it loses any momentum for me
I don't think that means I am unromantic |
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By *ljamMan
over a year ago
Edinburgh |
"If you don't get even the smallest bit of thrill from the chase then you can't have a romantic bone in your body. Don't see why it's got to be gendered either...
There's no thrill in it for me
It's nice to get to know people, recognise shared values, interests and an attraction
However, I like it to feel fluid, natural and in no way forced
As soon as it feels deliberate and pointedly sexual, it loses any momentum for me
I don't think that means I am unromantic "
This is probably more a problem in definition than anything else. Again, the chase to me covers that getting to know stage. Teasing out details and shared interests and generally having fun with it. If it doesn't feel natural then the chase ends. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Is there a difference between fab chasing and normal relationship chasing?
The relationship chasing i would say has more romance to it and i agree it shouldnt be gendered. The fab chasing though certainly more stressful and messy! |
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It's should be like a dance of desire, with both sides making steps, glances, a tease, a shyness with intention in some cases.
Whereas a huge amount of "chasers" don't chase. They simply apply pressure in the hope you will break.
When done with both parties dancing the same dance it can be a thing of beauty
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By *ljamMan
over a year ago
Edinburgh |
"It's should be like a dance of desire, with both sides making steps, glances, a tease, a shyness with intention in some cases.
Whereas a huge amount of "chasers" don't chase. They simply apply pressure in the hope you will break.
When done with both parties dancing the same dance it can be a thing of beauty
"
Spot on |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
People who play hard to get only have themselves to blame if the other party gives up thinking it's too much effort.
You can easily find 'the thrill of the chase' soon becomes 'sod this - life's too short' for the chaser or alternatively a case of 'Google - how do I get a restraining order' for the chased.
A sense of realism and balance is always good.
A |
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"It's should be like a dance of desire, with both sides making steps, glances, a tease, a shyness with intention in some cases.
Whereas a huge amount of "chasers" don't chase. They simply apply pressure in the hope you will break.
When done with both parties dancing the same dance it can be a thing of beauty
"
 |
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"People who play hard to get only have themselves to blame if the other party gives up thinking it's too much effort.
You can easily find 'the thrill of the chase' soon becomes 'sod this - life's too short' for the chaser or alternatively a case of 'Google - how do I get a restraining order' for the chased.
A sense of realism and balance is always good.
A"
I find it a hard line sometimes. I don't want to impose myself and I don't want to be a creep. So... I'm friendly and nothing more, usually, because I don't want to be inappropriate |
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"I hate being chased! Just feels overwhelming or like pressure and makes me dislike the person. I feel like the harder the chase the faster the disappearance after that man has got what he wants.
I like to have the opportunity to express my passion for a man rather than it being one sided. "
Same. If someone is chasing me, it’s only because I don’t want them, if that makes sense? If I’m interested in them and they’ve expressed an interest in me, I don’t play hard to get. So if I’m acting like I’m not interested, it’s because I’m not interested. Chasing me at that point basically becomes harassment really. |
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"If you don't get even the smallest bit of thrill from the chase then you can't have a romantic bone in your body. Don't see why it's got to be gendered either..."
What’s romantic about chasing someone? I’m not being sarcastic or anything, I genuinely don’t understand - probably because I’m demiromantic so I pretty much don’t have a romantic bone in my body. Not for strangers anyway. |
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By *igmaMan
over a year ago
Yorkshire |
Why bother? The best things always seem to be the ones that just happen. Appear out of nowhere and seem effortless. A natural coming together. I prefer those!! If anyone needs to be chased... I'm happy to give them a really long head start |
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