FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Sex positive
Sex positive
Jump to: Newest in thread
No, this isn't a thread about STI tests 
I recently came across this phrase for the first time, and I thought it was an apt description of my attitude towards sex and swinging. Would you describe yourself as sex positive? What does it mean to you? Do you think fab has changed your attitude in any way?
Mrs TMN x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I feel like I bond well with that term.
It’s part of daily life wether it happens daily or not. And I wish it could happen daily. So does that mean I’m Sexpositive, hoping that I get it more often |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"No, this isn't a thread about STI tests
I recently came across this phrase for the first time, and I thought it was an apt description of my attitude towards sex and swinging. Would you describe yourself as sex positive? What does it mean to you? Do you think fab has changed your attitude in any way?
Mrs TMN x"
My new fav term.
It can be argued that;
Sex positive = life positive
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I feel like I bond well with that term.
It’s part of daily life wether it happens daily or not. And I wish it could happen daily. So does that mean I’m Sexpositive, hoping that I get it more often "
Sounds like it to me! A positive part of life  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"No, this isn't a thread about STI tests
I recently came across this phrase for the first time, and I thought it was an apt description of my attitude towards sex and swinging. Would you describe yourself as sex positive? What does it mean to you? Do you think fab has changed your attitude in any way?
Mrs TMN x
My new fav term.
It can be argued that;
Sex positive = life positive
"
Interesting! So if someone is not sex positive, does that mean they are not life positive?
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Used to be.
I used to have a positive attitude towards it and the joy it could bring/give/be shared.
Now I don't and I'm quite disappointed about it.
It has become tarnished.
Not the act of sex itself but the shit that goes with it, the lies that go into getting it, and the massive hurt that can come from it. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
 |
By *igmaMan
over a year ago
Yorkshire |
See it around a lot on other sites where millennials hang out. Along with terms like CIS gendered and terfs. I find it all a bit wanky.
Identify seems to be King (...or Queen) in that generation. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"See it around a lot on other sites where millennials hang out. Along with terms like CIS gendered and terfs. I find it all a bit wanky.
Identify seems to be King (...or Queen) in that generation. "
Where do millenials hang out? I feel I missed my invite  . |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"See it around a lot on other sites where millennials hang out. Along with terms like CIS gendered and terfs. I find it all a bit wanky.
Identify seems to be King (...or Queen) in that generation. "
Ooh where do I sign up  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I love the term sex positive. I tend to use it to describe atmospheres rather than my own personal experience of sex which hasn't always been positive.
One of the reasons I love going to swingers clubs and events like Torture Garden is the sex positive environment where you can embrace your sexuality and be proud of who you are and your desires. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *igmaMan
over a year ago
Yorkshire |
"See it around a lot on other sites where millennials hang out. Along with terms like CIS gendered and terfs. I find it all a bit wanky.
Identify seems to be King (...or Queen) in that generation.
Ooh where do I sign up "
It’s on an app... don’t know if I’m allowed to say!
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I love sex. Joining Fab reintroduced me to the wonders of a really good session. Hopefully this virus does a disappearing act so the Mr & i can get reacquainted. Covid has not been kind to us  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I don’t really know. I’ve always loved sex but it has to be in a situation where I am happy and content and confident.
I’m seeing someone at the moment that indulges me in the way that makes me very sex positive and confident. I can’t keep my hands off of him and vice versa |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I don't really know what it means but my interpretation of the term is supporting everyone's legal and consensual sexual preferences and allowing them to express them without judgement.
I don't know many people like that |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Used to be.
I used to have a positive attitude towards it and the joy it could bring/give/be shared.
Now I don't and I'm quite disappointed about it.
It has become tarnished.
Not the act of sex itself but the shit that goes with it, the lies that go into getting it, and the massive hurt that can come from it."
Ah Peach, that is sad to hear. Do you think this might change in time? X |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I think "sex positive2 is a great term.
It reflects the positive attitude to life and the acceptance that we are all different, have different tastes and kinks but all deserve to have fun "
Yes, that's definitely something I took from it. Something for everyone, no matter who they are or what they are looking for. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"See it around a lot on other sites where millennials hang out. Along with terms like CIS gendered and terfs. I find it all a bit wanky.
Identify seems to be King (...or Queen) in that generation. "
Why do you find it wanky? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I don't really know what it means but my interpretation of the term is supporting everyone's legal and consensual sexual preferences and allowing them to express them without judgement.
I don't know many people like that"
Do you think there are more of them on fab than in "vanilla" life? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I don't really know what it means but my interpretation of the term is supporting everyone's legal and consensual sexual preferences and allowing them to express them without judgement.
I don't know many people like that
Do you think there are more of them on fab than in "vanilla" life? "
No, I think there are fewer on fab and in the swinging world in general.
It's almost as if a lot of swingers think they've got it right and nobody else has so they shut their minds. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"See it around a lot on other sites where millennials hang out. Along with terms like CIS gendered and terfs. I find it all a bit wanky.
Identify seems to be King (...or Queen) in that generation.
Why do you find it wanky? "
I think people say wanky when they mean intellectual and not immediately applicable.
And yeah, I enjoy a good intellectual wank. Not gonna lie.
But some of this changes our thinking and has positive knock on effects. I first encountered, loosely, ideas of gender fluidity at a university open day. What makes male or female? I remember the lecturer talking about genitalia being "drip dry or flip dry", for some reason it's stuck with me. It's helped me deconstruct so-called cultural truths. Made me more accepting, a better friend and ally. Seeds of ideas.
Other conversations on acceptance of bodies and sexuality, ones divergent from the norm or ideal. I've wanked along to various intellectual threads etc... stuff filters through. It's allowed me to accept myself, accept my sexuality, my exhibitionism. Accept myself. It's been fucking liberating.
It's intellectually taxing, it's not of immediate benefit, and a lot of people don't get it. But it fucking matters.
And on this theme, also things like the "yes means yes" blog. Informs my sex positivity. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I don't really know what it means but my interpretation of the term is supporting everyone's legal and consensual sexual preferences and allowing them to express them without judgement.
I don't know many people like that
Do you think there are more of them on fab than in "vanilla" life?
No, I think there are fewer on fab and in the swinging world in general.
It's almost as if a lot of swingers think they've got it right and nobody else has so they shut their minds."
Very true |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I don't really know what it means but my interpretation of the term is supporting everyone's legal and consensual sexual preferences and allowing them to express them without judgement.
I don't know many people like that
Do you think there are more of them on fab than in "vanilla" life?
No, I think there are fewer on fab and in the swinging world in general.
It's almost as if a lot of swingers think they've got it right and nobody else has so they shut their minds."
Yes, this still surprises me. It really shouldn't, by this point! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I don't really know what it means but my interpretation of the term is supporting everyone's legal and consensual sexual preferences and allowing them to express them without judgement.
I don't know many people like that
Do you think there are more of them on fab than in "vanilla" life?
No, I think there are fewer on fab and in the swinging world in general.
It's almost as if a lot of swingers think they've got it right and nobody else has so they shut their minds.
Yes, this still surprises me. It really shouldn't, by this point! "
It constantly makes me go  . People talk about being open minded and accepting but very few are when they discover that people are different to them. I assume they're threatened or not 100% secure in their choices. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"See it around a lot on other sites where millennials hang out. Along with terms like CIS gendered and terfs. I find it all a bit wanky.
Identify seems to be King (...or Queen) in that generation.
Why do you find it wanky?
I think people say wanky when they mean intellectual and not immediately applicable.
And yeah, I enjoy a good intellectual wank. Not gonna lie.
But some of this changes our thinking and has positive knock on effects. I first encountered, loosely, ideas of gender fluidity at a university open day. What makes male or female? I remember the lecturer talking about genitalia being "drip dry or flip dry", for some reason it's stuck with me. It's helped me deconstruct so-called cultural truths. Made me more accepting, a better friend and ally. Seeds of ideas.
Other conversations on acceptance of bodies and sexuality, ones divergent from the norm or ideal. I've wanked along to various intellectual threads etc... stuff filters through. It's allowed me to accept myself, accept my sexuality, my exhibitionism. Accept myself. It's been fucking liberating.
It's intellectually taxing, it's not of immediate benefit, and a lot of people don't get it. But it fucking matters.
And on this theme, also things like the "yes means yes" blog. Informs my sex positivity."
Ah Swing, we can intellectually wank together I'm with you. Stuff like this informs my thinking, my view of the world which has obviously been shaped by my own upbringing and experiences. It can be difficult to find your own set of ethics when they vary wildly from your family's. I hope this kind of inclusive positive acceptance can filter through to my own children as they find themselves in the world. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
" Yes, this still surprises me. It really shouldn't, by this point!
It constantly makes me go . People talk about being open minded and accepting but very few are when they discover that people are different to them. I assume they're threatened or not 100% secure in their choices."
This is very true. Even in the sex blogging community which prides itself on being sex positive, the reality is far from it. People are quite set in their ways and aren't quite as open minded as they'd like to proclaim. What's worse is seeing the almost proud statements of disgust/ridicule folk make about not doing/doing certain things and then later going on to say their open mindedness. 
So, I'm with Nice on this one. I think sex positive is a lovely idea but the reality is rather different. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"No, this isn't a thread about STI tests
I recently came across this phrase for the first time, and I thought it was an apt description of my attitude towards sex and swinging. Would you describe yourself as sex positive? What does it mean to you? Do you think fab has changed your attitude in any way?
Mrs TMN x"
Very much so!
I bloody adore great sex but - more importantly I think - I’m very willing to accept that others enjoy aspects of sex that I don’t - and that’s absolutely fine!
One thing that disappointed me immensely when joining the site is that swingers are often just as judgmental as non swingers when it comes to gangbangs, bdsm, watersports etc etc. There’s not as much tolerance as I’d hoped. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
" Yes, this still surprises me. It really shouldn't, by this point!
It constantly makes me go . People talk about being open minded and accepting but very few are when they discover that people are different to them. I assume they're threatened or not 100% secure in their choices.
This is very true. Even in the sex blogging community which prides itself on being sex positive, the reality is far from it. People are quite set in their ways and aren't quite as open minded as they'd like to proclaim. What's worse is seeing the almost proud statements of disgust/ridicule folk make about not doing/doing certain things and then later going on to say their open mindedness.
So, I'm with Nice on this one. I think sex positive is a lovely idea but the reality is rather different."
All the more reason that we should embrace it, surely? If I think about how much has changed even in the last twenty years in terms of acceptance of different gender, sexualities, relationships, it gives more hope for a more accepting future. X |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"No, this isn't a thread about STI tests
I recently came across this phrase for the first time, and I thought it was an apt description of my attitude towards sex and swinging. Would you describe yourself as sex positive? What does it mean to you? Do you think fab has changed your attitude in any way?
Mrs TMN x
Very much so!
I bloody adore great sex but - more importantly I think - I’m very willing to accept that others enjoy aspects of sex that I don’t - and that’s absolutely fine!
One thing that disappointed me immensely when joining the site is that swingers are often just as judgmental as non swingers when it comes to gangbangs, bdsm, watersports etc etc. There’s not as much tolerance as I’d hoped. "
This, very much this. I choose to use the 'other' site for anything kink/BDSM related due to the judgement on here. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
"
All the more reason that we should embrace it, surely? If I think about how much has changed even in the last twenty years in terms of acceptance of different gender, sexualities, relationships, it gives more hope for a more accepting future. X"
I can be accepting of the myriad of genders, of different sexualities and all of the different types of wonderful relationships people can form (heck, I'm pan in a poly relationship) and the various ways people find pleasure without ascribing to a term that I've seen used as more of a collector's badge than people truly acting in a sex positive way.
I think that continuing to talk about my experiences, genuinely listening to others and asking questions whilst removing my learned biases, reading and showing support to others where necessary is more important to me than saying I'm sex positive right now.
I do think it's important for us to embrace the ideology behind it but I think that sometimes it can be framed in a way that makes it less accessible for some - almost in a this is only for the intellects to understand the various nuances of humans and sexuality. That's a shame isn't it? I don't like the gatekeeping I've seen go on with it before.
I'm trying not to sound scathing because I do think it's an important discussion and I do like lot of what the sex positive movement stands for - how you view it Mrs TMN I understand and I'm behind that because I've read you act in that way many times.
Sorry for the long reply! x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"See it around a lot on other sites where millennials hang out. Along with terms like CIS gendered and terfs. I find it all a bit wanky.
Identify seems to be King (...or Queen) in that generation.
Why do you find it wanky?
I think people say wanky when they mean intellectual and not immediately applicable.
And yeah, I enjoy a good intellectual wank. Not gonna lie.
But some of this changes our thinking and has positive knock on effects. I first encountered, loosely, ideas of gender fluidity at a university open day. What makes male or female? I remember the lecturer talking about genitalia being "drip dry or flip dry", for some reason it's stuck with me. It's helped me deconstruct so-called cultural truths. Made me more accepting, a better friend and ally. Seeds of ideas.
Other conversations on acceptance of bodies and sexuality, ones divergent from the norm or ideal. I've wanked along to various intellectual threads etc... stuff filters through. It's allowed me to accept myself, accept my sexuality, my exhibitionism. Accept myself. It's been fucking liberating.
It's intellectually taxing, it's not of immediate benefit, and a lot of people don't get it. But it fucking matters.
And on this theme, also things like the "yes means yes" blog. Informs my sex positivity.
Ah Swing, we can intellectually wank together I'm with you. Stuff like this informs my thinking, my view of the world which has obviously been shaped by my own upbringing and experiences. It can be difficult to find your own set of ethics when they vary wildly from your family's. I hope this kind of inclusive positive acceptance can filter through to my own children as they find themselves in the world. "
So, so much.
I fail, frequently, but I try. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"
All the more reason that we should embrace it, surely? If I think about how much has changed even in the last twenty years in terms of acceptance of different gender, sexualities, relationships, it gives more hope for a more accepting future. X
I can be accepting of the myriad of genders, of different sexualities and all of the different types of wonderful relationships people can form (heck, I'm pan in a poly relationship) and the various ways people find pleasure without ascribing to a term that I've seen used as more of a collector's badge than people truly acting in a sex positive way.
I think that continuing to talk about my experiences, genuinely listening to others and asking questions whilst removing my learned biases, reading and showing support to others where necessary is more important to me than saying I'm sex positive right now.
I do think it's important for us to embrace the ideology behind it but I think that sometimes it can be framed in a way that makes it less accessible for some - almost in a this is only for the intellects to understand the various nuances of humans and sexuality. That's a shame isn't it? I don't like the gatekeeping I've seen go on with it before.
I'm trying not to sound scathing because I do think it's an important discussion and I do like lot of what the sex positive movement stands for - how you view it Mrs TMN I understand and I'm behind that because I've read you act in that way many times.
Sorry for the long reply! x"
No need to apologise, Meli, I always appreciate your well thought out contributions
I hear what you're saying. It's a term I've only just come across so I wasn't aware of it being framed in a way of looking down on others "oh look at me I'm so liberated". I think that's what your saying?
For me, I'm not looking to label myself as sex positive, it's more that the ideology appeals in terms of how I live my life and view the world. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"
All the more reason that we should embrace it, surely? If I think about how much has changed even in the last twenty years in terms of acceptance of different gender, sexualities, relationships, it gives more hope for a more accepting future. X
I can be accepting of the myriad of genders, of different sexualities and all of the different types of wonderful relationships people can form (heck, I'm pan in a poly relationship) and the various ways people find pleasure without ascribing to a term that I've seen used as more of a collector's badge than people truly acting in a sex positive way.
I think that continuing to talk about my experiences, genuinely listening to others and asking questions whilst removing my learned biases, reading and showing support to others where necessary is more important to me than saying I'm sex positive right now.
I do think it's important for us to embrace the ideology behind it but I think that sometimes it can be framed in a way that makes it less accessible for some - almost in a this is only for the intellects to understand the various nuances of humans and sexuality. That's a shame isn't it? I don't like the gatekeeping I've seen go on with it before.
I'm trying not to sound scathing because I do think it's an important discussion and I do like lot of what the sex positive movement stands for - how you view it Mrs TMN I understand and I'm behind that because I've read you act in that way many times.
Sorry for the long reply! x"
Yes!
You said it way better than I ever could.
Educate don't patronise.
Discuss don't dismiss.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *igmaMan
over a year ago
Yorkshire |
"See it around a lot on other sites where millennials hang out. Along with terms like CIS gendered and terfs. I find it all a bit wanky.
Identify seems to be King (...or Queen) in that generation.
Why do you find it wanky?
I think people say wanky when they mean intellectual and not immediately applicable.
And yeah, I enjoy a good intellectual wank. Not gonna lie.
But some of this changes our thinking and has positive knock on effects. I first encountered, loosely, ideas of gender fluidity at a university open day. What makes male or female? I remember the lecturer talking about genitalia being "drip dry or flip dry", for some reason it's stuck with me. It's helped me deconstruct so-called cultural truths. Made me more accepting, a better friend and ally. Seeds of ideas.
Other conversations on acceptance of bodies and sexuality, ones divergent from the norm or ideal. I've wanked along to various intellectual threads etc... stuff filters through. It's allowed me to accept myself, accept my sexuality, my exhibitionism. Accept myself. It's been fucking liberating.
It's intellectually taxing, it's not of immediate benefit, and a lot of people don't get it. But it fucking matters.
And on this theme, also things like the "yes means yes" blog. Informs my sex positivity."
Something like that ^^ |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
