FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > confident lady with out the looks

confident lady with out the looks

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

hi all,

ok trying to get my head round this,I get chatting to ladys and find iam attracted to the confident female.

My question is a lady who i and most guys would not take a second look at while walking down a street. Think on this site they are gods gift. I get chatting to them all going well, then the face pic is sent if in my eyes iam not attracted to them send polite message back saying not for me, i always get abuse.

now to balance things out when i get message back turning me down on looks

my reply is always.

thanks for getting back to me and no problems and wish you all the best

thoughts please

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By *etillanteWoman over a year ago

I have to say the same also happens with guys.

I suppose one man or womans beauty is anothers beast.

I always just say thanks but no thanks, if abuse comes back, then just delete and/or block

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

not every one is for every one else but looks are only skin deep will say we have met guys of here who Jane wouldnt looked twice at in the street and the personality has shone through looks arnt the be all and end all but sending out a polite message is always worth it even if you dont get one back

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

I'm not sure I understand what you're saying. I don't think confidence should be the prerogative of good looking people anymore than I think manners are only required if you're a minger.

I think confidence is hugely attractive in a man or a woman, arrogance and bad manners is a massive turn off for me no matter how good looking someone is.

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By *he_original_poloWoman over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

Ask for the face pic ealier.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman over a year ago

little house on the praire

Thats why i have face pictures on my profile and request face pictures with messages. Saves a lot of messing about. Im not looking for adonis just a nice guy but there are some people that you just cant find attractive. I assume if someone messages me they have looked at my photos

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

never had that problem

i find all women beautiful...

joking aside, its wrong for anyone to get abuse for saying 'thanks but no thanks' whether it be man or woman..

just a sign of immaturity and you are better off for not knowing them so block 'em and move on....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I have the same problem with my f e pic always letting me down , so now I send it after the 1st or 2nd message , just find it makes things easier but I agree if it's me that's not wanting to take things further I always give a polite no and never once have I even thought about sending abuse , that I just don't get ??

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By *etillanteWoman over a year ago

some people just cannot take rejection

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman over a year ago

evesham

There is a risk of people (girls and boys) getting big headed on sites like this. I can only speak for me of course but I can see how it could be easy for a woman to believe all they hype. The number of fit toned men who think I'm the sexiest thing ever is amazing...yet they never appear when I'm out in the town

Good thing I am such a laid back person and keep my feet on the ground lol

If looks are important to you then as polo says, ask for their pic earlier.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

You mean ......

Nooooooooooooooooo !

All those messages from men who LOVE older women are just knob softening attempts ?

Wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh im devastated.

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By *ENDAROOSCouple over a year ago

South West London / Surrey

"some people just cannot take rejection"

Agrees!

I am sure none of us enjoy being rejected but it's part and parcel of swinging.

Never understand why some people choose to get nasty over it. Plenty of others to choose from

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I have to say the same also happens with guys.

I suppose one man or womans beauty is anothers beast.

I always just say thanks but no thanks, if abuse comes back, then just delete and/or block"

agreed, same here

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By *NicenNaughteyCouple over a year ago

Preston

some times we would rather have a no thanks than be ignored at least a no thanks is good manners

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By *abioMan over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

looks and confidence aren't tied together....

confidence comes from inside... just as I would say that confident people have an aura around them regardless of what they look like and that in a way is sexy to some people...

mind you I would also say true beauty comes from within....

but it can be a very thin line between confidence and arrogance... love confidence hate arrogance

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

i get such messages on a weekly basis

I send a polite no thanks and get messages back telling me im a fat and ugly and how dare i say they are not my type when they can do better than me dowen the pub etc had one guy tell me i was to stupid to know a good thing when offered and i couldnt do better than him etc etc etc

its not down to being a man, its not down to being a woman you wouldnt look twice at walking down the street its down to rhe individual, some men, women and couples do this, some just cant take rejection and it happens in all groups

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

There really can't be anyone who handles rejection well ?

I mean really ?

Even if you say there are plenty more out there etc.... It's never nice nor easy to deal with is it ?

So if some deal with it by being aggressive and rude that's their way of dealing with it - and at least they are honest !

Those who say they truly don't care - well done and good luck , just hope it doesn't get pushed back and make you unhappy ever .

We are so happy to have each other and if we ever get the rejection it's the fact we have each other that gives us our happiness

So each to their own - live and let live and don't be too quick to judge people's reactions

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

yes sorry to say it i've done it, been chattin and get on like house on fire, ask for a pic (gotta know who am chattin to)get it and then realise i aint attracted to him...

i just say to him 'sorry hun, but u aint my kinda guy'.... never had abuse yet! just a 'thanks for being honest and have fun'..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Same as Diamond, I have face pics on my profile and ask for one when messaged as then we can both see if it is worth pursuing

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Happened to me last week!

Now, i'm first to admit i'm not a 'looker' but at least i amen't hiding my face!

I got a msg from a gal with no profile pic, after a few msges back and forth, i asked her for a pic as i like to see/know who i'm talking to!

When she sent it, she looked like grotbags sister, (and grotbags had got the looks where she got the brains)!

While i'm not solely looks orientated, there must be SOME attraction involved!

When i told her she warn't my type for a meet but i'd gladly keep in touch for a chat, she went haywire!! I had to end up blocking her due to the abuse i was getting!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Some have to turn rejection from one person back into a loathing and shower of insults in order for them to justify their need to move on. People say this is human nature, but it can be tempered certainly.

Wolf

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"some people just cannot take rejection

Agrees!

I am sure none of us enjoy being rejected but it's part and parcel of swinging.

Never understand why some people choose to get nasty over it. Plenty of others to choose from

+1 - absolutely - draw a line under it/them and move on...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Thats why i have face pictures on my profile and request face pictures with messages. Saves a lot of messing about. Im not looking for adonis just a nice guy but there are some people that you just cant find attractive. I assume if someone messages me they have looked at my photos"

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