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Confess your sins Sunday
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"I tricked a colleague into trying Da Bomb hotsauce yesterday.
Poor fella, number 2 probably felt like giving birth after that."
Thy child this is an anonymous confession thread for you to seek repentance. You have publicly shared yourself and that in turn will be your repentance written in stone. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I tricked a colleague into trying Da Bomb hotsauce yesterday.
Poor fella, number 2 probably felt like giving birth after that.
Thy child this is an anonymous confession thread for you to seek repentance. You have publicly shared yourself and that in turn will be your repentance written in stone."
Oppps I didn't read the OP  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Shouldn't that be 'my child's not 'thy child'??
Mr
Or even 'my child' - bloody autocorrect insists on putting an s after every apostrophe 
Sacrilege and blasphemy "
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A deceitful sinner
Forgive me for I have sinned.
I went to my friends house for dinner the other evening. He has a new girlfriend and I really don't like her at all. She's obnoxious and so rude, can't wait until he sees that side of her, as everyone else does!
Cue me going into the bathroom to have a wee and I spied a pair of her knickers hanging out of the washing basket. I had a lovely shade of chestnut coloured lipstick in my pocket. It's my favourite colour.... So I smeared some up the back of her knickers and hid them in the laundry basket.... My friend is fanatical about laundry so I know it's him that does it all!!
Really want to be a fly on the wall when he finds them!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A deceitful sinner
Forgive me for I have sinned.
I went to my friends house for dinner the other evening. He has a new girlfriend and I really don't like her at all. She's obnoxious and so rude, can't wait until he sees that side of her, as everyone else does!
Cue me going into the bathroom to have a wee and I spied a pair of her knickers hanging out of the washing basket. I had a lovely shade of chestnut coloured lipstick in my pocket. It's my favourite colour.... So I smeared some up the back of her knickers and hid them in the laundry basket.... My friend is fanatical about laundry so I know it's him that does it all!!
Really want to be a fly on the wall when he finds them!!! "
This is just brilliant and brutal all at the same time |
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An adultery sinner 
I met a really hot older lady in a club near me (personal trainer). She told me she was married but we met up for amazing sex for a few months and she used to send me pics too.
One day whilst we were having sex and she was literally screaming the house down and the window was open there was a knock at the door.
It turned out her husband had tracked her iphone (as he bought it for her) and was at the door! That was very very awkward! |
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Forbidden pictures sinner
Forgive me ma’am for I have sinned
I posted nude pictures which I should have binned
They were live and open on the old snapchat
And on thinking back, I’m a bit of a twat!
Friends and strangers looked and stared
I feel ashamed that I had bared!
So I beg you please forgive my sin
I’ll accept my punishment for something I should have put in the bin! |
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Burning down religion sinner
Forgive me OP for I have sinned, I once set a church pew alight during a christingle service. Who thought giving an eight year old a candle to play with was a good idea  |
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"I have spent the weekend being a whore with two ex girlfriends after breaking up with my recent one obviously not together separate meets "
My child you are not anonymous and just announced to the congregation that you have been whoring out of wedlock.
50 hail marys per person
50 self lashes with a belt per person
Plus to tell each ex about the other
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D*unk golf sinner
Unfortunately I planned to meet friends today at the golf course and I missed meeting them because I slept until half 11 due to having a few too many drinks last night even though I told them I wouldn't drink. |
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so I cleverly suggested I'll treat other half and her daughter to an Indian takeaway 
I help myself to the contents of the Church collection plate during Sunday Services.
A Tory MP