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If you are not meet verified

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

"don't message me"

"I will not meet you"

"You are not serious about meeting anyone"

"you must be just a pic collector"

I hate seeing this in profiles. It makes me think that some women assume that it's just as easy for single men to meet women as it is for them to meet men. When the reality is that I can't even get a message nevermind a meet, so how they expect me to have veris! Ffs meet me and give me one then.

So it's got me thinking would any of you ladies in the forums meet someone who isn't meet verified?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Have done and unfortunately after one bad experience would not be open to doing it again.

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By *luebell888Woman  over a year ago

Glasgowish

Yes of course i would.x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Yes quite a few times socially. Didn’t always lead to more though. I’m a pretty good judge as I like to chat for a while before I’ll meet. I don’t have an issue with it all. I’m more likely to meet someone with no veris than hundreds.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I would chat to them and then base my decision on whether I meet them on how well the conversation goes, but I normally meet for a coffee or a drink first and if I feel comfortable enough chatting to them then yeah I would meet without a veri

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Someone took a chance on me... We all start somewhere

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Alas, one of the ironies of this site... normally you won't get a meet unless you've met someone and you won't meet someone because you can't get a meet!

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By *ob Carpe DiemMan  over a year ago

Torquay

Veris have to start somewhere or it becomes a closed club, I've met but I'm not a verify collector

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Veris have to start somewhere or it becomes a closed club, I've met but I'm not a verify collector"

Me neither. I don’t show them and I don’t ask for them but it’s good to have the tick at least.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Imagine dancing in a club or having a drink at a bar.......... then you shout at the top of your voice.....

Scuse me who else has fucked this bloke and was he any good ? Will he kill me ?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Imagine dancing in a club or having a drink at a bar.......... then you shout at the top of your voice.....

Scuse me who else has fucked this bloke and was he any good ? Will he kill me ?"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Imagine dancing in a club or having a drink at a bar.......... then you shout at the top of your voice.....

Scuse me who else has fucked this bloke and was he any good ? Will he kill me ?"

Lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Alas, one of the ironies of this site... normally you won't get a meet unless you've met someone and you won't meet someone because you can't get a meet! "

That's how I said it to someone and she blocked me lol

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By *oncupiscence73Woman  over a year ago

South

Being totally honest I’ve had a better time with unverified men on here than verified men- they’ve been a LOT more mature and sensible post meet too. Men with lots of veris in my experience are fuck and run merchants and aren’t honest about it.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I honestly think getting a webcam veri is your best bet. Either in the chatrooms here, or through chatting with someone on an app where you can send live pics/videos etc. The veri just shows you are who you say you are and that someone else has seen this first hand.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Being totally honest I’ve had a better time with unverified men on here than verified men- they’ve been a LOT more mature and sensible post meet too. Men with lots of veris in my experience are fuck and run merchants and aren’t honest about it. "

Yep. I’ve never understood the issue with meeting people without the tick!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Imagine dancing in a club or having a drink at a bar.......... then you shout at the top of your voice.....

Scuse me who else has fucked this bloke and was he any good ? Will he kill me ?"

He might if they replied and said he's crap in bed

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By *00KissesCouple  over a year ago

Stourbridge

Yes we would but social before play x

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I honestly think getting a webcam veri is your best bet. Either in the chatrooms here, or through chatting with someone on an app where you can send live pics/videos etc. The veri just shows you are who you say you are and that someone else has seen this first hand."

Do chat rooms work on a phone? I tried before but I couldn't get on with it

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Yes. I have a process. Meet verifications can help reassure me that this person is safe, but they're a small part of the puzzle and are no guarantee.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Alas, one of the ironies of this site... normally you won't get a meet unless you've met someone and you won't meet someone because you can't get a meet!

That's how I said it to someone and she blocked me lol "

Feel for you, been there!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Imagine dancing in a club or having a drink at a bar.......... then you shout at the top of your voice.....

Scuse me who else has fucked this bloke and was he any good ? Will he kill me ?

He might if they replied and said he's crap in bed "

But one persons crap is anothers delight... You are not necessarily gonna have great sex with every person you meet?!

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By *orbidden eastMan  over a year ago

london dodging electric scooters

Does not make any difference to me. To me verifications are just there to show you that they are real and maybe what their preferences is.

Unless they ghost you.

Then you are just talking to thin air

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I landed in hospital before I was meet verified.

It can cause issues for women too

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Imagine dancing in a club or having a drink at a bar.......... then you shout at the top of your voice.....

Scuse me who else has fucked this bloke and was he any good ? Will he kill me ?

He might if they replied and said he's crap in bed

But one persons crap is anothers delight... You are not necessarily gonna have great sex with every person you meet?! "

True. I've read verifications where they have raved on about what happened when they met and I've sometimes thought, nah that's not my idea of fun.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I landed in hospital before I was meet verified.

It can cause issues for women too "

You landed in hospital ?

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"I landed in hospital before I was meet verified.

It can cause issues for women too

You landed in hospital ? "

I ended up in hospital shortly after I started my profile. Ages ago.

New single female profile: I had an interesting learning curve

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I honestly think getting a webcam veri is your best bet. Either in the chatrooms here, or through chatting with someone on an app where you can send live pics/videos etc. The veri just shows you are who you say you are and that someone else has seen this first hand.

Do chat rooms work on a phone? I tried before but I couldn't get on with it "

Apparently with puffin browser they do, though I've never tried.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I landed in hospital before I was meet verified.

It can cause issues for women too

You landed in hospital ?

I ended up in hospital shortly after I started my profile. Ages ago.

New single female profile: I had an interesting learning curve "

I see not the best of starts for meets

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"I landed in hospital before I was meet verified.

It can cause issues for women too

You landed in hospital ?

I ended up in hospital shortly after I started my profile. Ages ago.

New single female profile: I had an interesting learning curve

I see not the best of starts for meets "

No.

I also learned about interesting forms of abuse and that dudes claim to be willing to come and fuck you in the ward

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I honestly think getting a webcam veri is your best bet. Either in the chatrooms here, or through chatting with someone on an app where you can send live pics/videos etc. The veri just shows you are who you say you are and that someone else has seen this first hand.

Do chat rooms work on a phone? I tried before but I couldn't get on with it

Apparently with puffin browser they do, though I've never tried. "

Hmm well I guess most are getting these cam veris on computers. I wouldn't know how to turn one on.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


""don't message me"

"I will not meet you"

"You are not serious about meeting anyone"

"you must be just a pic collector"

I hate seeing this in profiles. It makes me think that some women assume that it's just as easy for single men to meet women as it is for them to meet men. When the reality is that I can't even get a message nevermind a meet, so how they expect me to have veris! Ffs meet me and give me one then.

So it's got me thinking would any of you ladies in the forums meet someone who isn't meet verified? "

I have but gave up as the percentage that weren't interested in a social was huge ...

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


""don't message me"

"I will not meet you"

"You are not serious about meeting anyone"

"you must be just a pic collector"

I hate seeing this in profiles. It makes me think that some women assume that it's just as easy for single men to meet women as it is for them to meet men. When the reality is that I can't even get a message nevermind a meet, so how they expect me to have veris! Ffs meet me and give me one then.

So it's got me thinking would any of you ladies in the forums meet someone who isn't meet verified?

I have but gave up as the percentage that weren't interested in a social was huge ... "

I won't meet anyone who won't do a social first.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I landed in hospital before I was meet verified.

It can cause issues for women too

You landed in hospital ?

I ended up in hospital shortly after I started my profile. Ages ago.

New single female profile: I had an interesting learning curve

I see not the best of starts for meets

No.

I also learned about interesting forms of abuse and that dudes claim to be willing to come and fuck you in the ward "

You didn't miss out on that opportunity did you?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


""don't message me"

"I will not meet you"

"You are not serious about meeting anyone"

"you must be just a pic collector"

I hate seeing this in profiles. It makes me think that some women assume that it's just as easy for single men to meet women as it is for them to meet men. When the reality is that I can't even get a message nevermind a meet, so how they expect me to have veris! Ffs meet me and give me one then.

So it's got me thinking would any of you ladies in the forums meet someone who isn't meet verified?

I have but gave up as the percentage that weren't interested in a social was huge ...

I won't meet anyone who won't do a social first."

Me either!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


""don't message me"

"I will not meet you"

"You are not serious about meeting anyone"

"you must be just a pic collector"

I hate seeing this in profiles. It makes me think that some women assume that it's just as easy for single men to meet women as it is for them to meet men. When the reality is that I can't even get a message nevermind a meet, so how they expect me to have veris! Ffs meet me and give me one then.

So it's got me thinking would any of you ladies in the forums meet someone who isn't meet verified?

I have but gave up as the percentage that weren't interested in a social was huge ... "

I would love a social to be honest. I think that is one of the best things about the site, making friends.

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"I landed in hospital before I was meet verified.

It can cause issues for women too

You landed in hospital ?

I ended up in hospital shortly after I started my profile. Ages ago.

New single female profile: I had an interesting learning curve

I see not the best of starts for meets

No.

I also learned about interesting forms of abuse and that dudes claim to be willing to come and fuck you in the ward

You didn't miss out on that opportunity did you? "

My hospitalisation was incompatible with what they had in mind.

Afterwards my header said I wasn't meeting for awhile. I referred to the people who wanted to as applying the Marvin Gaye approach.

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By *ob Carpe DiemMan  over a year ago

Torquay

You can meet someone via a glory hole and be verified or dogging, really does not mean a lot, name, address and know something about them should count for more

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By *partharmonyCouple  over a year ago

Ruislip

I have never understood the necessity of verifying single men. They are the lowest in the pecking order around here. Who would pretend to be one?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I landed in hospital before I was meet verified.

It can cause issues for women too

You landed in hospital ?

I ended up in hospital shortly after I started my profile. Ages ago.

New single female profile: I had an interesting learning curve

I see not the best of starts for meets

No.

I also learned about interesting forms of abuse and that dudes claim to be willing to come and fuck you in the ward

You didn't miss out on that opportunity did you?

My hospitalisation was incompatible with what they had in mind.

Afterwards my header said I wasn't meeting for awhile. I referred to the people who wanted to as applying the Marvin Gaye approach."

The Marvin approach

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"I have never understood the necessity of verifying single men. They are the lowest in the pecking order around here. Who would pretend to be one? "

Difference between photo verification and meet verification.

Photo verification: yeah you're a dude that's not that impressive.

Meet verification: someone met you and survived/ was untraumatised enough by the experience that they were willing to confirm it. "Another woman met this person and wasn't harmed" has value, unfortunately.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I’ve met 5 guys in total from here and actually had sex with them. All of those guys weren’t verified till I met them. Had a knack for finding the newest most good looking guys!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I don't but it's because of being messed around on here in the past. If someone's verified you get more of a feel of a person. That being said, we've all got to start somewhere so I do feel for the guys who can't get a meet!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I have never understood the necessity of verifying single men. They are the lowest in the pecking order around here. Who would pretend to be one?

Difference between photo verification and meet verification.

Photo verification: yeah you're a dude that's not that impressive.

Meet verification: someone met you and survived/ was untraumatised enough by the experience that they were willing to confirm it. "Another woman met this person and wasn't harmed" has value, unfortunately."

Yeah basically I need to prove I'm not a Jack the ripper type of fabber

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"I don't but it's because of being messed around on here in the past. If someone's verified you get more of a feel of a person. That being said, we've all got to start somewhere so I do feel for the guys who can't get a meet!"

My meeting of someone I'm not sure about is something like a Wetherspoons in an area not close to where I live. "you might be a creep but you're not likely to try something on here and you won't know where I live"

I work it around other things so if they don't show up not much is lost.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I’ve met 5 guys in total from here and actually had sex with them. All of those guys weren’t verified till I met them. Had a knack for finding the newest most good looking guys! "

Camera knack aye

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"I have never understood the necessity of verifying single men. They are the lowest in the pecking order around here. Who would pretend to be one?

Difference between photo verification and meet verification.

Photo verification: yeah you're a dude that's not that impressive.

Meet verification: someone met you and survived/ was untraumatised enough by the experience that they were willing to confirm it. "Another woman met this person and wasn't harmed" has value, unfortunately.

Yeah basically I need to prove I'm not a Jack the ripper type of fabber "

Yes. And women need to make that calculation... I want to go home at the end of a meet, safe.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I’ve met 5 guys in total from here and actually had sex with them. All of those guys weren’t verified till I met them. Had a knack for finding the newest most good looking guys!

Camera knack aye "

I don’t understand?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I’ve met 5 guys in total from here and actually had sex with them. All of those guys weren’t verified till I met them. Had a knack for finding the newest most good looking guys!

Camera knack aye

I don’t understand?"

Just thinking how you found the knack to find newest good looking guys

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By *ob Carpe DiemMan  over a year ago

Torquay


"I have never understood the necessity of verifying single men. They are the lowest in the pecking order around here. Who would pretend to be one?

Difference between photo verification and meet verification.

Photo verification: yeah you're a dude that's not that impressive.

Meet verification: someone met you and survived/ was untraumatised enough by the experience that they were willing to confirm it. "Another woman met this person and wasn't harmed" has value, unfortunately.

Yeah basically I need to prove I'm not a Jack the ripper type of fabber "

Blimey Jeffrey Dahmer could probably have got a hundred verifies by all accounts he was quite the charmer, pretty meaningless to be honest, name, address and make sure you pass the info on who you are meeting to someone you trust, not always possible I know but worth considering

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I have been here before on and off for 6 years.

I rejoined through covid. Meets are not supposed to happen till after covid. What I've seen today that could meen 2025.

I never ask people I've met to re verify me. In fact I don't meet them again. I've seen it on profiles

'met this guy on his previous profile'

Cam verification is what most fab swinger's use.

So no you will not see meets showing and besides they should not be taking place during covid 19. But they do.

Meeting for anything is being controlled by Parliament

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I’ve met 5 guys in total from here and actually had sex with them. All of those guys weren’t verified till I met them. Had a knack for finding the newest most good looking guys!

Camera knack aye

I don’t understand?

Just thinking how you found the knack to find newest good looking guys "

I suppose they found me, most my meets were with profiles less than a month old and completely unverified.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


""don't message me"

"I will not meet you"

"You are not serious about meeting anyone"

"you must be just a pic collector"

I hate seeing this in profiles. It makes me think that some women assume that it's just as easy for single men to meet women as it is for them to meet men. When the reality is that I can't even get a message nevermind a meet, so how they expect me to have veris! Ffs meet me and give me one then.

So it's got me thinking would any of you ladies in the forums meet someone who isn't meet verified? "

Yes. Verifications don't prove anything. They can be faked.

Another person's "great shag" means nothing if there's no chemistry.

There's a real person behind every profile.

An axe murderer always has a first victim. Just because s/he didn't chop up their previous meets, doesn't mean they won't chop me up.

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By *xxfun80Man  over a year ago

dundee

Where do I start ??

There’s no tick in my interactive boxes !! ??x

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"I have never understood the necessity of verifying single men. They are the lowest in the pecking order around here. Who would pretend to be one?

Difference between photo verification and meet verification.

Photo verification: yeah you're a dude that's not that impressive.

Meet verification: someone met you and survived/ was untraumatised enough by the experience that they were willing to confirm it. "Another woman met this person and wasn't harmed" has value, unfortunately.

Yeah basically I need to prove I'm not a Jack the ripper type of fabber

Blimey Jeffrey Dahmer could probably have got a hundred verifies by all accounts he was quite the charmer, pretty meaningless to be honest, name, address and make sure you pass the info on who you are meeting to someone you trust, not always possible I know but worth considering"

Sure. But anything can be faked and you build a picture. It's part of a picture which you also build with other things and decide at what level of risk you're prepared to proceed.

I'm not saying meet verification is green light. It's not.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

I'm starting to feel a bit dodgy without veris now. Like I'm a bit of a weee bit of a werrr type.

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"I'm starting to feel a bit dodgy without veris now. Like I'm a bit of a weee bit of a werrr type. "

No, it's not like that. Sorry

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I'm starting to feel a bit dodgy without veris now. Like I'm a bit of a weee bit of a werrr type.

No, it's not like that. Sorry"

I know lol I'm just thinking out loud

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Can’t display meet Veris at the moment anyway so it’s pointless.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Can’t display meet Veris at the moment anyway so it’s pointless. "

He could still get the tick though. The tick seems important to most people lol

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By *emini ManMan  over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"I have never understood the necessity of verifying single men. They are the lowest in the pecking order around here. Who would pretend to be one?

Difference between photo verification and meet verification.

Photo verification: yeah you're a dude that's not that impressive.

Meet verification: someone met you and survived/ was untraumatised enough by the experience that they were willing to confirm it. "Another woman met this person and wasn't harmed" has value, unfortunately.

Yeah basically I need to prove I'm not a Jack the ripper type of fabber "

Whilst there *is* some basis in that - it's quite easily done without the need for veris and there are plenty of people that will meet someone without any - is just a case, both ways, of building trust and respect over a period of time and is as important for us men to have as it is women - whilst I do have veris, I'd like to think they're a tiny part of proving to anyone that I am someone they'd be comfortable meeting.

Veris really aren't the be all and end all that some like to make out - yes they can help, but they're not absolute must haves for everyone either.

Show you're a decent sort in your interactions and that counts for a lot more I've found, and that applies regardless of what gender you are.

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By *emini ManMan  over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"Can’t display meet Veris at the moment anyway so it’s pointless.

He could still get the tick though. The tick seems important to most people lol"

The tick? Is that like the clap and a good thing to avoid?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Can’t display meet Veris at the moment anyway so it’s pointless. "

I know. I've seen a few disguised as cam verifications, basically saying how good the sex was lol.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Can’t display meet Veris at the moment anyway so it’s pointless.

He could still get the tick though. The tick seems important to most people lol

The tick? Is that like the clap and a good thing to avoid? "

Haha. Something like that

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I always joke oh are you not veried because you haven't met anyone yet or because you axe murdered them all a before they had chance to leave you one... But its more of a tease than serious question, I think honestly I am more likely to chat with somone verified because there more likely to be who they say but I would et not meet with someone purely because they don't have a veri yet

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I don’t tend to worry about picking a new guy up for the first time. Chances of us both being axe murderers is quite rare.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I have never understood the necessity of verifying single men. They are the lowest in the pecking order around here. Who would pretend to be one?

Difference between photo verification and meet verification.

Photo verification: yeah you're a dude that's not that impressive.

Meet verification: someone met you and survived/ was untraumatised enough by the experience that they were willing to confirm it. "Another woman met this person and wasn't harmed" has value, unfortunately.

Yeah basically I need to prove I'm not a Jack the ripper type of fabber

Whilst there *is* some basis in that - it's quite easily done without the need for veris and there are plenty of people that will meet someone without any - is just a case, both ways, of building trust and respect over a period of time and is as important for us men to have as it is women - whilst I do have veris, I'd like to think they're a tiny part of proving to anyone that I am someone they'd be comfortable meeting.

Veris really aren't the be all and end all that some like to make out - yes they can help, but they're not absolute must haves for everyone either.

Show you're a decent sort in your interactions and that counts for a lot more I've found, and that applies regardless of what gender you are."

Yes but I think that without a meet veri it's hard to interact. I mean they just don't want to chat.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I used to randomly offer brew meets to verify people. Id just put a status up. I've not done it since lockdown though. And the amount of people that messed me around and stood me up was insane. It's a good job I took it all with a pinch of salt or it could be depressing!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I don’t tend to worry about picking a new guy up for the first time. Chances of us both being axe murderers is quite rare. "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I don’t tend to worry about picking a new guy up for the first time. Chances of us both being axe murderers is quite rare. "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I would chat to them and then base my decision on whether I meet them on how well the conversation goes, but I normally meet for a coffee or a drink first and if I feel comfortable enough chatting to them then yeah I would meet without a veri"

I'd be really up for meeting you Lucy

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By *emini ManMan  over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"

Yes but I think that without a meet veri it's hard to interact. I mean they just don't want to chat. "

And you just have to accept that for *some* that will be the case, in the same way as *some* will rule you out because you're not over 6ft, don't live local, can't accommodate or any other reason - as I said there are plenty that will - best to focus on those whose criteria you do meet than worry about those you don't I've found.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I don’t tend to worry about picking a new guy up for the first time. Chances of us both being axe murderers is quite rare. "

Jesus

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Maybe, just maybe people use the no meet verification as a polite way to say no thank you.

If you’re messaging someone that finds you attractive they’ll give you the benefit of the doubt especially if you come across as genuine. Offer to chat on the phone and agree to meet for a coffee before the main event.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I like meeting fab virgins and spoiling them for anyone else

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By *ersnickety PantsWoman  over a year ago

Club Meets Only

I'm guilty of having **meet verified guys only** but they quite often miss that bit

Sorts the wheat from the chaff a bit that's all OP

It doesn't mean that I think someone isn't serious, or real or anything & yes I have met with unverified guys

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Maybe, just maybe people use the no meet verification as a polite way to say no thank you.

If you’re messaging someone that finds you attractive they’ll give you the benefit of the doubt especially if you come across as genuine. Offer to chat on the phone and agree to meet for a coffee before the main event. "

Yes no doubt some do that

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I like meeting fab virgins and spoiling them for anyone else "

Aha

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

The thought of meeting someone who’s already met loads puts me off a lot more than meeting someone who’s not met anyone off the site so far.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"The thought of meeting someone who’s already met loads puts me off a lot more than meeting someone who’s not met anyone off the site so far."

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Its not trip advisor OP. You don't need the approval of others or a tick in a box to prove who you are.

Just be you.

Those who wear the blinkers of "don't meet unverified" etc do as they choose, as is their right. They often forget that we were all unverified when we first joined fab.

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By *irty PrettyWoman  over a year ago

Cardiff


"You can meet someone via a glory hole and be verified or dogging, really does not mean a lot, name, address and know something about them should count for more"

No-one gets my address or last name, and not many get my first name. That’s for my safety. My veris prove I really exist and am really a woman, which is pretty important on here.

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman  over a year ago

On a mooch

I’ve met a few none verified people, it’s never bothered me, everyone has to start somewhere. It’s more the chat build up beforehand that determines whether I’ll meet someone.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Its not trip advisor OP. You don't need the approval of others or a tick in a box to prove who you are.

Just be you.

Those who wear the blinkers of "don't meet unverified" etc do as they choose, as is their right. They often forget that we were all unverified when we first joined fab."

Yes it just gets to me whenever I see it

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By *alandNitaCouple  over a year ago

Scunthorpe


""don't message me"

"I will not meet you"

"You are not serious about meeting anyone"

"you must be just a pic collector"

I hate seeing this in profiles. It makes me think that some women assume that it's just as easy for single men to meet women as it is for them to meet men. When the reality is that I can't even get a message nevermind a meet, so how they expect me to have veris! Ffs meet me and give me one then.

So it's got me thinking would any of you ladies in the forums meet someone who isn't meet verified? "

When they are open, clubs are great for getting verified. Usually club staff will be happy to verify you, as will people you chat to.

Cal

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


""don't message me"

"I will not meet you"

"You are not serious about meeting anyone"

"you must be just a pic collector"

I hate seeing this in profiles. It makes me think that some women assume that it's just as easy for single men to meet women as it is for them to meet men. When the reality is that I can't even get a message nevermind a meet, so how they expect me to have veris! Ffs meet me and give me one then.

So it's got me thinking would any of you ladies in the forums meet someone who isn't meet verified?

When they are open, clubs are great for getting verified. Usually club staff will be happy to verify you, as will people you chat to.

Cal"

Yes and I think clubs are the best way for single men to meet women. Unfortunately there are none where I live.

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By *tephTV67TV/TS  over a year ago

Cheshire

One club night (when they were open) or socials could get you a plethora of verifications. This site has never been one issue resolved, will get you a meet or any interest.

There still has to be a good profile and pictures with a thorough presence on the site. And the last and most important thing is patience, as often said on here, it’s not instashag if you’re not attractive to the women or others on here, that meet won’t happen, verifications or not.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"One club night (when they were open) or socials could get you a plethora of verifications. This site has never been one issue resolved, will get you a meet or any interest.

There still has to be a good profile and pictures with a thorough presence on the site. And the last and most important thing is patience, as often said on here, it’s not instashag if you’re not attractive to the women or others on here, that meet won’t happen, verifications or not. "

Yeah I would go to a club once to see what it's like, but I wouldn't like to make a habit of it, I mean it's just not possible for me.

Id much rather meet someone out of a club.

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By *irty PrettyWoman  over a year ago

Cardiff

I’ve been talking to someone since near the start of lockdown, I only recently realised he isn’t verified yet but it doesn’t bother me. We get on, and we’ll have a social when we can, and both those things are more important than veris. I’ve met two guys who had loads of veris raving about how wonderful they are and had really dismal meets with them, so I don’t pay any attention to what veris say most of the time. I look more at who’s left them, and whether they themselves are genuine.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Yeah I have met unverified men a couple of times and had good experiences but it's a tricky one... I'm wary of new profiles as a general rule but then if they have gone a long time, ie over a year (obviously not in the current circumstances though), without meeting then that's a massive red flag too.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Its not trip advisor OP. You don't need the approval of others or a tick in a box to prove who you are.

Just be you.

Those who wear the blinkers of "don't meet unverified" etc do as they choose, as is their right. They often forget that we were all unverified when we first joined fab.

Yes it just gets to me whenever I see it "

Change of perspective required perhaps. Why would you ever care about what someone you dint know and have never met thinks of you based on their preconceptions gained through their experience of others?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Its not trip advisor OP. You don't need the approval of others or a tick in a box to prove who you are.

Just be you.

Those who wear the blinkers of "don't meet unverified" etc do as they choose, as is their right. They often forget that we were all unverified when we first joined fab.

Yes it just gets to me whenever I see it

Change of perspective required perhaps. Why would you ever care about what someone you dint know and have never met thinks of you based on their preconceptions gained through their experience of others?"

You made a good point there

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By *ob Carpe DiemMan  over a year ago

Torquay


"Can’t display meet Veris at the moment anyway so it’s pointless. "

You can just not published ones, I see a couple who's verifies tick up every week, be adding to it myself soon I expect

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Just looking at my profile and its made me laugh when I noticed that I put looking for couples (FF)

Haha I must of had high hopes when I joined this

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Just looking at my profile and its made me laugh when I noticed that I put looking for couples (FF)

Haha I must of had high hopes when I joined this "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Just looking at my profile and its made me laugh when I noticed that I put looking for couples (FF)

Haha I must of had high hopes when I joined this "

I know you were just joking but honestly this is kind of the problem... A lot of men sign up thinking it's just going to be a massive sexual free for all full of amateur DTF porn stars and forget that the people on here are just, well, people.

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By *rincess peachWoman  over a year ago

shits creek

It is easy for single men to get meet verified tho (under normal circumstances)

It means getting off your single man's bum cheeks and attending an organised social or going to a club.

It annoys me coz it's almost like some single men see that as too much effort if it ain't gonna end in a fuck.

Well, neither does meeting 1 to 1 guarantee a fuck and a social at least guarantees meeting other humans.

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By *emini ManMan  over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"It is easy for single men to get meet verified tho (under normal circumstances)

It means getting off your single man's bum cheeks and attending an organised social or going to a club.

It annoys me coz it's almost like some single men see that as too much effort if it ain't gonna end in a fuck.

Well, neither does meeting 1 to 1 guarantee a fuck and a social at least guarantees meeting other humans.

"

Nail on the head - although it does also raise another very valid counter-axe murderer fear point - some of my social veries are from people I didn't spend more than 5-10 mins chatting to at socials - so not sure how that would prove I'm not certifiable

Which again proves the point that veris, especially just a couple of them, are effectively worthless other than to say you're human and are either male or female.

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By *ily WhiteWoman  over a year ago

?

I'm guilty of having that on my profile, but it's only as part of my safety checks, I couldn't give a monkeys about who they've met or what they did...a couple of weirdos and a stalker over the years have made me a bit wary.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I have the exact same problem, I answer all messages I get regardless if we are going to connect or not.. I have met zero people on here. Met loads in the real world. How mad is that?

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

It's all preferences and individual comfort zone at the end of the day. Sacrosanct

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm guilty of having that on my profile, but it's only as part of my safety checks, I couldn't give a monkeys about who they've met or what they did...a couple of weirdos and a stalker over the years have made me a bit wary. "

Same i have it on mine as a safety more than anything. I always insist on a social beforehand and I have met one or two unverified , both adults having a coffee and chat. But after one guy basically looked me up and down in the coffee shop and left before we even had chatted I now dont meet unverified guys. Costs nothing to have manners

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By *agneto.Man  over a year ago

Bham

Yeah but could also be a security thing.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Met a non verified guy once, we met in town beforehand and he was a proper charmer, had the looks, body and all that went with.

Headed back to mine, sex was rather weird as he kept asking me to call him daddy (even though I’d advised that wasn’t the type of role play I was into) then after sex we were chilling out with a beer and it ended up he was the most racist guy I ever met, if he had donned the klan outfit I wouldn’t of been surprised tbh

So now, I won’t meet unverified , once bitten and twice shy xx

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By *emini ManMan  over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"Met a non verified guy once, we met in town beforehand and he was a proper charmer, had the looks, body and all that went with.

Headed back to mine, sex was rather weird as he kept asking me to call him daddy (even though I’d advised that wasn’t the type of role play I was into) then after sex we were chilling out with a beer and it ended up he was the most racist guy I ever met, if he had donned the klan outfit I wouldn’t of been surprised tbh

So now, I won’t meet unverified , once bitten and twice shy xx"

Not a great experience for sure but how would him being verified or not have made a difference to that - he could quite easily have been verified and done those things, and either his verifiers hadn't mentioned it, or weren't bothered by in the same way you were etc.

Not saying you're wrong to adopt that approach, just interested in how a verification would make a difference in that instance.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Met a non verified guy once, we met in town beforehand and he was a proper charmer, had the looks, body and all that went with.

Headed back to mine, sex was rather weird as he kept asking me to call him daddy (even though I’d advised that wasn’t the type of role play I was into) then after sex we were chilling out with a beer and it ended up he was the most racist guy I ever met, if he had donned the klan outfit I wouldn’t of been surprised tbh

So now, I won’t meet unverified , once bitten and twice shy xx

Not a great experience for sure but how would him being verified or not have made a difference to that - he could quite easily have been verified and done those things, and either his verifiers hadn't mentioned it, or weren't bothered by in the same way you were etc.

Not saying you're wrong to adopt that approach, just interested in how a verification would make a difference in that instance."

If he had acted the same way with another meet they likely wouldn't leave him a veri saying he's all sweetness and light. Although that does hinge on him being racist with every meet.

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By *hilloutMan  over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest


"It is easy for single men to get meet verified tho (under normal circumstances)

It means getting off your single man's bum cheeks and attending an organised social or going to a club.

It annoys me coz it's almost like some single men see that as too much effort if it ain't gonna end in a fuck.

Well, neither does meeting 1 to 1 guarantee a fuck and a social at least guarantees meeting other humans.

"

Well stated

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By *unLove24Man  over a year ago

London/Birmingham

Young fine gentlemen like myself and know one is serious on here... Guess it’s luck of the draw on fabs hehehe

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Bit new to this trying to work it all out, message me! 28 slim and ready to fuck!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Met a non verified guy once, we met in town beforehand and he was a proper charmer, had the looks, body and all that went with.

Headed back to mine, sex was rather weird as he kept asking me to call him daddy (even though I’d advised that wasn’t the type of role play I was into) then after sex we were chilling out with a beer and it ended up he was the most racist guy I ever met, if he had donned the klan outfit I wouldn’t of been surprised tbh

So now, I won’t meet unverified , once bitten and twice shy xx

Not a great experience for sure but how would him being verified or not have made a difference to that - he could quite easily have been verified and done those things, and either his verifiers hadn't mentioned it, or weren't bothered by in the same way you were etc.

Not saying you're wrong to adopt that approach, just interested in how a verification would make a difference in that instance."

As amber said below me, generally if they have great veris about them being lovely guys etc they usually are. No one (in their right mind) would verify someone who was a very poor meet , especially someone racist etc xx

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By *isaB45Woman  over a year ago

Fabville


""don't message me"

"I will not meet you"

"You are not serious about meeting anyone"

"you must be just a pic collector"

I hate seeing this in profiles. It makes me think that some women assume that it's just as easy for single men to meet women as it is for them to meet men. When the reality is that I can't even get a message nevermind a meet, so how they expect me to have veris! Ffs meet me and give me one then.

So it's got me thinking would any of you ladies in the forums meet someone who isn't meet verified? "

It's my profile and my choice, so ner.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Met a non verified guy once, we met in town beforehand and he was a proper charmer, had the looks, body and all that went with.

Headed back to mine, sex was rather weird as he kept asking me to call him daddy (even though I’d advised that wasn’t the type of role play I was into) then after sex we were chilling out with a beer and it ended up he was the most racist guy I ever met, if he had donned the klan outfit I wouldn’t of been surprised tbh

So now, I won’t meet unverified , once bitten and twice shy xx

Not a great experience for sure but how would him being verified or not have made a difference to that - he could quite easily have been verified and done those things, and either his verifiers hadn't mentioned it, or weren't bothered by in the same way you were etc.

Not saying you're wrong to adopt that approach, just interested in how a verification would make a difference in that instance.

As amber said below me, generally if they have great veris about them being lovely guys etc they usually are. No one (in their right mind) would verify someone who was a very poor meet , especially someone racist etc xx"

If he had left after the shag and before the racist rant you would probably have verified him as being a lovely guy too.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Bit new to this trying to work it all out, message me! 28 slim and ready to fuck!"

Read the site message on the home page about covid.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Met a non verified guy once, we met in town beforehand and he was a proper charmer, had the looks, body and all that went with.

Headed back to mine, sex was rather weird as he kept asking me to call him daddy (even though I’d advised that wasn’t the type of role play I was into) then after sex we were chilling out with a beer and it ended up he was the most racist guy I ever met, if he had donned the klan outfit I wouldn’t of been surprised tbh

So now, I won’t meet unverified , once bitten and twice shy xx

Not a great experience for sure but how would him being verified or not have made a difference to that - he could quite easily have been verified and done those things, and either his verifiers hadn't mentioned it, or weren't bothered by in the same way you were etc.

Not saying you're wrong to adopt that approach, just interested in how a verification would make a difference in that instance.

As amber said below me, generally if they have great veris about them being lovely guys etc they usually are. No one (in their right mind) would verify someone who was a very poor meet , especially someone racist etc xx

If he had left after the shag and before the racist rant you would probably have verified him as being a lovely guy too. "

But he didn’t, so I didn’t either way we’re all entitled to our own preferences and a lot just happen to want verified members only xx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I only have one cam verification.

I chat in the chat rooms on cam and if people want to verify me it's their call.

I don't ask for veri's, that's up to the people who've seem my cam.

Also, I joined post lockdown so if I had a load of meeting veri's I'd be picked up on it I'm sure.

TBH I'm not fussed if I'm judged on the amount of veri's I have or don't have

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By *ustBoWoman  over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

I've met a few people who have been unveried. In fact one has become a really close friend.

If someone hasn't a veri especially if they joined this year it doesn't bother me.

But if someone has been on a long time no veris no effort profile then that does raise a red flag. Most of the people I met with no veris had made an effort with their profiles.The only one who didn't actually turned kinda stalkerish for a while after.

At present a lot aren't meeting so getting a veri is harder and a lot of people pay no heed to cam veris. But op don't think because you get a veri everything will change from what guys have told me it tends not to make that much difference. It's still a tough site for single guys a lot of the time.

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By *layfullsamMan  over a year ago

Solihull


""don't message me"

"I will not meet you"

"You are not serious about meeting anyone"

"you must be just a pic collector"

I hate seeing this in profiles. It makes me think that some women assume that it's just as easy for single men to meet women as it is for them to meet men. When the reality is that I can't even get a message nevermind a meet, so how they expect me to have veris! Ffs meet me and give me one then.

So it's got me thinking would any of you ladies in the forums meet someone who isn't meet verified? "

Why do you hate seeing it on someone else's profile ?

It's there profile and up to them what they put, maybe they've had bad experiences.

Life's to short to worry about other peoples profiles

Take it as a red flag that they're not for you

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By *irty PrettyWoman  over a year ago

Cardiff


"Young fine gentlemen like myself and know one is serious on here... Guess it’s luck of the draw on fabs hehehe"

Have you read the thread at all? We’re all perfectly serious, but we use Fab the way that works for us. What works for us may well not line up with what you want. But did you really join a few weeks ago and expect to be fighting women off? That doesn’t happen in normal times, it certainly isn’t going to happen in a pandemic.

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By *irty PrettyWoman  over a year ago

Cardiff


"Bit new to this trying to work it all out, message me! 28 slim and ready to fuck!"

Your comment and the one above you are representative of why people don’t often want to meet brand new men.

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By *rincess peachWoman  over a year ago

shits creek


"Bit new to this trying to work it all out, message me! 28 slim and ready to fuck!"

Well your pecker really doesn't need to be ready. Give it a slap or dunk it in an ice bath. Be a long long while yet before fucking is back on the agenda. I know we're calling it the fucking pandemic, but I feel you may have the wrong end of the stick. There is no fucking, there is just a pandemic

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Bit new to this trying to work it all out, message me! 28 slim and ready to fuck!

Your comment and the one above you are representative of why people don’t often want to meet brand new men."

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By *assion and MoreCouple  over a year ago

Here and There, Monaghan

We would meet people who are not verified, we would just be more cautious about them, are they who they say they are? Are they genuine? Are they actually meeting (when it's safe to do so again) etc. Unfortunately there are too many time wasters on here. Verifications are not full proof, just an indication that they are genuine.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Very good point, veris go missing also I’m seeing. I used to be on here years ago with my ex and we would meet people who didn’t have any veris but just be cautious. Fab has changed massively now, too many time wasters

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'm not 'meet verified' and I've had an account on here for nearly 11 years (not this profile, I hasten to add). I don't like them, simple! I don't like receiving verifications! Tbh, I'd rather a "meet" be kept between the people in the room... Or watching! ( read my profile on WHY I don't like Veris )

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Does someone wanna come verify me??

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

We are all unverified at some point of this process. But why would you want to broadcast your history. I’d meet verified or unverified and the keep the events of that meet between me and the lady.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Feel the same women ask for long messages I do be genuine still nothing u can imagine the messages us men have to send to get one reply

We become more like a secatary with a cock lol

This is why so many cut and paste to

Women don’t have to read through profiles for secret codes to say in messages to prove they have read it women just look in there inbox

So frustrating

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm not 'meet verified' and I've had an account on here for nearly 11 years (not this profile, I hasten to add). I don't like them, simple! I don't like receiving verifications! Tbh, I'd rather a "meet" be kept between the people in the room... Or watching! ( read my profile on WHY I don't like Veris )"

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By *rincess peachWoman  over a year ago

shits creek


"Feel the same women ask for long messages I do be genuine still nothing u can imagine the messages us men have to send to get one reply

We become more like a secatary with a cock lol

This is why so many cut and paste to

Women don’t have to read through profiles for secret codes to say in messages to prove they have read it women just look in there inbox

So frustrating "

But how do you know that any of the shit in their inbox is from someone who's read a profile and meets what said woman is looking for?

How do you know some women don't block all men from messaging and do the searching themselves?

Some men think it's sooooo easy for women on here.

Yeah, it's a piece of piss as a woman if you're happy to fuck anyone who messages, but those requiring more than just a penis, well, it ain't all that easy to build connections.

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By *irty PrettyWoman  over a year ago

Cardiff


"Feel the same women ask for long messages I do be genuine still nothing u can imagine the messages us men have to send to get one reply

We become more like a secatary with a cock lol

This is why so many cut and paste to

Women don’t have to read through profiles for secret codes to say in messages to prove they have read it women just look in there inbox

So frustrating "

That’s right, we have it so easy. We don’t have to read 100s of disgusting messages, we don’t get abuse from men who don’t like that we have standards, we don’t have any problems at all. We’re just nasty, mean, selfish people who won’t put out for every man who winks at us.

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"Feel the same women ask for long messages I do be genuine still nothing u can imagine the messages us men have to send to get one reply

We become more like a secatary with a cock lol

This is why so many cut and paste to

Women don’t have to read through profiles for secret codes to say in messages to prove they have read it women just look in there inbox

So frustrating "

And here the secretary with a vagina (or just secretary? Male secretaries exist) has to trawl through god knows what abuse and other horrific shite.

It's not easy for anyone.

(Right now it's extremely easy for me because I'm not meeting and my filters are set to "no")

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Being totally honest I’ve had a better time with unverified men on here than verified men- they’ve been a LOT more mature and sensible post meet too. Men with lots of veris in my experience are fuck and run merchants and aren’t honest about it. "

Is this a bad thing?

If a guy has lots of meets and verifications....

Why is he a fuck and run merchant?

I’m not attacking you , but this is a swinging site.

I wouldn’t expect single men and women on here to be monogamous......

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By *oncupiscence73Woman  over a year ago

South

[Removed by poster at 31/10/20 18:40:28]

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By *oncupiscence73Woman  over a year ago

South


"Being totally honest I’ve had a better time with unverified men on here than verified men- they’ve been a LOT more mature and sensible post meet too. Men with lots of veris in my experience are fuck and run merchants and aren’t honest about it.

Is this a bad thing?

If a guy has lots of meets and verifications....

Why is he a fuck and run merchant?

I’m not attacking you , but this is a swinging site.

I wouldn’t expect single men and women on here to be monogamous......

"

Sorry I wasn’t clear .. the men ive met the more the veris the bigger a twat they were post meet.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Agree

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By *oncupiscence73Woman  over a year ago

South


"Feel the same women ask for long messages I do be genuine still nothing u can imagine the messages us men have to send to get one reply

We become more like a secatary with a cock lol

This is why so many cut and paste to

Women don’t have to read through profiles for secret codes to say in messages to prove they have read it women just look in there inbox

So frustrating

But how do you know that any of the shit in their inbox is from someone who's read a profile and meets what said woman is looking for?

How do you know some women don't block all men from messaging and do the searching themselves?

Some men think it's sooooo easy for women on here.

Yeah, it's a piece of piss as a woman if you're happy to fuck anyone who messages, but those requiring more than just a penis, well, it ain't all that easy to build connections."

Exactly!!!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

i ask for phone number sorts them out

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By *erry bull1Man  over a year ago

doncaster

My Veris are slowly getting less as people I have met leave the , but it doesn’t worry me one bit

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By *avey57Man  over a year ago

cheshunt

I have met a few people, mainly men, and still didn’t get verified. Only veri I got was on fab guys. Not everyone wants to bother with verifications. 1 guy I have seen about 10 or 11 times

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By *urga2076Woman  over a year ago

London

Tbh if you’ve been on here for a while (especially over a year) and have no Veris I wouldn’t touch. My own experience had been dire and i genuinely think that most women (or just me?) are far too polite to leave a veri that says “this guy is hopeless in bed” or whatever. For me the silence says a lot more.

For new just joined guys makes sense for them to ask for a quick video chat and video veri from a woman. I rarely have time to do that but if they seem genuinely nice I will occasionally do that just to get them started as I know how tough it is. Best of luck

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By *irty PrettyWoman  over a year ago

Cardiff


"Tbh if you’ve been on here for a while (especially over a year) and have no Veris I wouldn’t touch. My own experience had been dire and i genuinely think that most women (or just me?) are far too polite to leave a veri that says “this guy is hopeless in bed” or whatever. For me the silence says a lot more.

For new just joined guys makes sense for them to ask for a quick video chat and video veri from a woman. I rarely have time to do that but if they seem genuinely nice I will occasionally do that just to get them started as I know how tough it is. Best of luck"

I’ve never left a bad veri, I don’t see the point because they’ll never display it. Also they’ll probably just get nasty so you’ll have to block them and then the veri won’t be visible anyway. I just don’t leave a veri in those circumstances.

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By *urga2076Woman  over a year ago

London


"Tbh if you’ve been on here for a while (especially over a year) and have no Veris I wouldn’t touch. My own experience had been dire and i genuinely think that most women (or just me?) are far too polite to leave a veri that says “this guy is hopeless in bed” or whatever. For me the silence says a lot more.

For new just joined guys makes sense for them to ask for a quick video chat and video veri from a woman. I rarely have time to do that but if they seem genuinely nice I will occasionally do that just to get them started as I know how tough it is. Best of luck

I’ve never left a bad veri, I don’t see the point because they’ll never display it. Also they’ll probably just get nasty so you’ll have to block them and then the veri won’t be visible anyway. I just don’t leave a veri in those circumstances."

Exactly this. On one occasion I felt particularly unsafe. What are you going to do then? On a few others there’s a weird stalker thing going on. On all occasions I just learn from my mistakes but never bother with a veri

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Feel the same women ask for long messages I do be genuine still nothing u can imagine the messages us men have to send to get one reply

We become more like a secatary with a cock lol

This is why so many cut and paste to

Women don’t have to read through profiles for secret codes to say in messages to prove they have read it women just look in there inbox

So frustrating

That’s right, we have it so easy. We don’t have to read 100s of disgusting messages, we don’t get abuse from men who don’t like that we have standards, we don’t have any problems at all. We’re just nasty, mean, selfish people who won’t put out for every man who winks at us."

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By *JohnMan  over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

According to the Legends of the Ancient Times, it used to be fairly easy for the unverified to get a verification: go to one of the big socials, or go to a club. A meet verification from either of those tells people that (in increasing order of importance) 1) you are what you say you are, 2) you turn up to things, and 3) someone's had some kind of interaction with you and it went well enough that they wanted to give you a verification. That last one says a lot to anyone considering meeting you one-on-one.

It didn't take much to get verified in those distant almost-forgotten days. Not having a verification meant you couldn't even make that effort, or you were still new enough that there hadn't been a social nearby.

These days things are different. But then, we shouldn't be meeting except socially (and even that is being restricted again now). Everything is different.

Is it unfair that people put this requirement on their profile? It does put the unverified at a disadvantage. But they're not here for you. They're here for themselves. From their perspective, they have a choice between someone with a record of showing up and leaving a positive impression, or someone without that. If they're a couple or a woman looking for a man, there's usually enough of the first group for it to not be necessary considering the second. I think it's a reasonable position to take.

On the other hand, there are plenty who will give the unverified a chance. That could be out of generosity, a desire to repay the early chances that they were given, or a hope of finding the overlooked gems in that crowd. This is also a reasonable thing to do, and I applaud them.

You can't control how other people behave. It's unproductive to worry too much about it. Concentrate on what you can do, and show them the best version of yourself that you can.

Use all the tools that you have - there's a lot more than a profile, some photos, and mails to people you like the look of. Get yourself known in the forum, in chat, at socials or clubs (when that becomes possible again).

Be funny, be smart, be warm, be honest, be open, be generous, be someone that people want to be around, be the person that makes others feel good. Don't be just another guy after a fuck. There are millions of those.

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By *umalotagainMan  over a year ago

a town called malice


"Imagine dancing in a club or having a drink at a bar.......... then you shout at the top of your voice.....

Scuse me who else has fucked this bloke and was he any good ? Will he kill me ?"

Just spat my orange juice

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Well everybody has started with no veris, and is it not better to have no veris? At least you less likely to have aids. I see some people have hundreds and it makes me think ?? ohh god I think I will give that 1 a wide berth thanks

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By *irty PrettyWoman  over a year ago

Cardiff


"Well everybody has started with no veris, and is it not better to have no veris? At least you less likely to have aids. I see some people have hundreds and it makes me think ?? ohh god I think I will give that 1 a wide berth thanks"

Don’t be such a judgemental arse. Why would a lot of veris mean they have HIV? Most people with lots of veris are regulars at socials, you don’t get STIs from a conversation. And a person could have a lot of different partners but because of safe sex and regular testing, be STI-free; while a person with no veris but a pre-Fab history of barebacking and no testing could have everything under the sun. Plus which no veris doesn’t mean no meets, and then there are people like yourself who have veris but hide the summary because they don’t want people to know how many they have.

Maybe, if you have a problem with people having a lot of different partners, you shouldn’t be on a site like this.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


""don't message me"

"I will not meet you"

"You are not serious about meeting anyone"

"you must be just a pic collector"

I hate seeing this in profiles. It makes me think that some women assume that it's just as easy for single men to meet women as it is for them to meet men. When the reality is that I can't even get a message nevermind a meet, so how they expect me to have veris! Ffs meet me and give me one then.

So it's got me thinking would any of you ladies in the forums meet someone who isn't meet verified? "

I would and indeed have done

I have been 'let down' but I take that in my stride and have to balance it with those that I've met that play a part in my life away from the site

I think the biggest driver is mindset and attitude

If you hold out for the best but accept that occasionally you will be let down, then it is far less damaging to the ego

I can understand from others perspectives why it is such an annoyance - if to meet up you need to arrange childcare, find the time (and often money) to present yourself in a manner which gives you confidence and puts you in a 'sexy' mindset and take time away from the things you should be doing (washing, ironing, shopping, getting the kids uniforms ready, seeing family, whatever it is) then to have your time 'wasted' must be a major annoyance

So, people put safeguards in place - and a common one is meeting people who have previously proved to be reliable

That's all it is - well, that and an attempt to le out the web wankers, the players and the fakes

But they can be fun too

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By *ily WhiteWoman  over a year ago

?


"According to the Legends of the Ancient Times, it used to be fairly easy for the unverified to get a verification: go to one of the big socials, or go to a club. A meet verification from either of those tells people that (in increasing order of importance) 1) you are what you say you are, 2) you turn up to things, and 3) someone's had some kind of interaction with you and it went well enough that they wanted to give you a verification. That last one says a lot to anyone considering meeting you one-on-one.

It didn't take much to get verified in those distant almost-forgotten days. Not having a verification meant you couldn't even make that effort, or you were still new enough that there hadn't been a social nearby.

These days things are different. But then, we shouldn't be meeting except socially (and even that is being restricted again now). Everything is different.

Is it unfair that people put this requirement on their profile? It does put the unverified at a disadvantage. But they're not here for you. They're here for themselves. From their perspective, they have a choice between someone with a record of showing up and leaving a positive impression, or someone without that. If they're a couple or a woman looking for a man, there's usually enough of the first group for it to not be necessary considering the second. I think it's a reasonable position to take.

On the other hand, there are plenty who will give the unverified a chance. That could be out of generosity, a desire to repay the early chances that they were given, or a hope of finding the overlooked gems in that crowd. This is also a reasonable thing to do, and I applaud them.

You can't control how other people behave. It's unproductive to worry too much about it. Concentrate on what you can do, and show them the best version of yourself that you can.

Use all the tools that you have - there's a lot more than a profile, some photos, and mails to people you like the look of. Get yourself known in the forum, in chat, at socials or clubs (when that becomes possible again).

Be funny, be smart, be warm, be honest, be open, be generous, be someone that people want to be around, be the person that makes others feel good. Don't be just another guy after a fuck. There are millions of those."

well put

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Well everybody has started with no veris, and is it not better to have no veris? At least you less likely to have aids. I see some people have hundreds and it makes me think ?? ohh god I think I will give that 1 a wide berth thanks

Don’t be such a judgemental arse. Why would a lot of veris mean they have HIV? Most people with lots of veris are regulars at socials, you don’t get STIs from a conversation. And a person could have a lot of different partners but because of safe sex and regular testing, be STI-free; while a person with no veris but a pre-Fab history of barebacking and no testing could have everything under the sun. Plus which no veris doesn’t mean no meets, and then there are people like yourself who have veris but hide the summary because they don’t want people to know how many they have.

Maybe, if you have a problem with people having a lot of different partners, you shouldn’t be on a site like this."

Thats my opinion ok. Im allowed to have 1 and I didnt say they have aids. I said someone with hundreds of veris is more likely to have aids and that I would take a wide berth. Is that alright with you ??

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


""don't message me"

"I will not meet you"

"You are not serious about meeting anyone"

"you must be just a pic collector"

I hate seeing this in profiles. It makes me think that some women assume that it's just as easy for single men to meet women as it is for them to meet men. When the reality is that I can't even get a message nevermind a meet, so how they expect me to have veris! Ffs meet me and give me one then.

So it's got me thinking would any of you ladies in the forums meet someone who isn't meet verified? "

Yep. It's a classic Catch 22.

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By *ensualtouch15Man  over a year ago

ashby de la zouch


"Met a non verified guy once, we met in town beforehand and he was a proper charmer, had the looks, body and all that went with.

Headed back to mine, sex was rather weird as he kept asking me to call him daddy (even though I’d advised that wasn’t the type of role play I was into) then after sex we were chilling out with a beer and it ended up he was the most racist guy I ever met, if he had donned the klan outfit I wouldn’t of been surprised tbh

So now, I won’t meet unverified , once bitten and twice shy xx

Not a great experience for sure but how would him being verified or not have made a difference to that - he could quite easily have been verified and done those things, and either his verifiers hadn't mentioned it, or weren't bothered by in the same way you were etc.

Not saying you're wrong to adopt that approach, just interested in how a verification would make a difference in that instance.

As amber said below me, generally if they have great veris about them being lovely guys etc they usually are. No one (in their right mind) would verify someone who was a very poor meet , especially someone racist etc xx"

You are aware some women are also racist and oddly not all women share the same opinion of what nice is

In the above examples I think they are right the verification would be meaningless subjective at very best

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By *heekyeyesMan  over a year ago

Southampton


"I honestly think getting a webcam veri is your best bet. Either in the chatrooms here, or through chatting with someone on an app where you can send live pics/videos etc. The veri just shows you are who you say you are and that someone else has seen this first hand."

I totally agree with you x

Therefore I need to be verified by the sexiest lady from Southampton!

You got to help a friend out lol

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I have been a fair few, guys, first verification... I don't think it makes a massive difference as to how reliable etc they are... And said to guys often as it's easier than telling someone you aren't attracted to them enough to want to fuck them

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By *oodnitegirlWoman  over a year ago

Yorkshire

I happily meet people who aren’t meet verified but I have had lots over the years ‘bottle it’ at the last minute so I can see why some ladies are wary x

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By *irty PrettyWoman  over a year ago

Cardiff


"Well everybody has started with no veris, and is it not better to have no veris? At least you less likely to have aids. I see some people have hundreds and it makes me think ?? ohh god I think I will give that 1 a wide berth thanks

Don’t be such a judgemental arse. Why would a lot of veris mean they have HIV? Most people with lots of veris are regulars at socials, you don’t get STIs from a conversation. And a person could have a lot of different partners but because of safe sex and regular testing, be STI-free; while a person with no veris but a pre-Fab history of barebacking and no testing could have everything under the sun. Plus which no veris doesn’t mean no meets, and then there are people like yourself who have veris but hide the summary because they don’t want people to know how many they have.

Maybe, if you have a problem with people having a lot of different partners, you shouldn’t be on a site like this.

Thats my opinion ok. Im allowed to have 1 and I didnt say they have aids. I said someone with hundreds of veris is more likely to have aids and that I would take a wide berth. Is that alright with you ??"

No, it’s not “alright with me” because as I said, you can’t get AIDS or anything else from conversations, and there are plenty of people in the vanilla world who are much less responsible about these things than a lot of the people on here. I say again, if you have a problem with people having sex with a lot of people, YOU SHOULD NOT BE ON A SWINGING SITE. I don’t know how much more clearly I can put it, this is not the place to be uptight about people having a lot of sex!

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By * Plus ECouple  over a year ago

The South


""don't message me"

"I will not meet you"

"You are not serious about meeting anyone"

"you must be just a pic collector"

I hate seeing this in profiles. It makes me think that some women assume that it's just as easy for single men to meet women as it is for them to meet men. When the reality is that I can't even get a message nevermind a meet, so how they expect me to have veris! Ffs meet me and give me one then.

So it's got me thinking would any of you ladies in the forums meet someone who isn't meet verified? "

I/We have met unverified guys.

We appreciate everyone has to start somewhere, we were all unverified at the beginning.

A lot depends on their introduction, if they've read our profile and how the chat goes.

E

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Well everybody has started with no veris, and is it not better to have no veris? At least you less likely to have aids. I see some people have hundreds and it makes me think ?? ohh god I think I will give that 1 a wide berth thanks

Don’t be such a judgemental arse. Why would a lot of veris mean they have HIV? Most people with lots of veris are regulars at socials, you don’t get STIs from a conversation. And a person could have a lot of different partners but because of safe sex and regular testing, be STI-free; while a person with no veris but a pre-Fab history of barebacking and no testing could have everything under the sun. Plus which no veris doesn’t mean no meets, and then there are people like yourself who have veris but hide the summary because they don’t want people to know how many they have.

Maybe, if you have a problem with people having a lot of different partners, you shouldn’t be on a site like this.

Thats my opinion ok. Im allowed to have 1 and I didnt say they have aids. I said someone with hundreds of veris is more likely to have aids and that I would take a wide berth. Is that alright with you ??

No, it’s not “alright with me” because as I said, you can’t get AIDS or anything else from conversations, and there are plenty of people in the vanilla world who are much less responsible about these things than a lot of the people on here. I say again, if you have a problem with people having sex with a lot of people, YOU SHOULD NOT BE ON A SWINGING SITE. I don’t know how much more clearly I can put it, this is not the place to be uptight about people having a lot of sex!"

Listen you argumentative Welsh wonder There's lots of people on here who don't have 100s of veris. There's alot who are varied by cam im just sayin that there's also a few who are veried 100s of times by meets. And to me I would be put off cos I'd think about my sexual health cos none of us want aids. Im not sayin everyone who has lots of meets has aids its just that there's potential there to have some sort of sti. So from my point of view id stay away . Thats my perogative and view of things , if you cant handle that maybe you shouldn't be in a forum where people have diffrent views ??

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By *oodnitegirlWoman  over a year ago

Yorkshire

Checks vagina and 400 veris. Nope. Still not fallen off.

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By *izzabelle and well hungCouple  over a year ago

Edinburgh.

Guys have to do an apprenticeship. Go to clubs and socials. Then women know they are solid. Simple, and if you don’t like it, you are probably a crap shag.

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By * Plus ECouple  over a year ago

The South


"Well everybody has started with no veris, and is it not better to have no veris? At least you less likely to have aids. I see some people have hundreds and it makes me think ?? ohh god I think I will give that 1 a wide berth thanks"

Unbelievable comment.

E

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Guys have to do an apprenticeship. Go to clubs and socials. Then women know they are solid. Simple, and if you don’t like it, you are probably a crap shag. "

This is classic...... not all guys.... some of us guys actually can get sex without pandering to couples.....

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By *irty PrettyWoman  over a year ago

Cardiff


"Well everybody has started with no veris, and is it not better to have no veris? At least you less likely to have aids. I see some people have hundreds and it makes me think ?? ohh god I think I will give that 1 a wide berth thanks

Unbelievable comment.

E"

Disgusting isn’t it?

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By * Plus ECouple  over a year ago

The South


"Well everybody has started with no veris, and is it not better to have no veris? At least you less likely to have aids. I see some people have hundreds and it makes me think ?? ohh god I think I will give that 1 a wide berth thanks

Unbelievable comment.

E

Disgusting isn’t it?"

Yes. Very.

And confusing. Man wants sex. Joins site where sex is available. Complains that people are having too much sex.

I've seen comments like that before. I work on the assumption that they're not getting enough of the sex they signed up for.

Oddly, that attitude is what prevents them from getting the sex.

Funny that.

Some people just filter themselves out.

E

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By * Plus ECouple  over a year ago

The South


"Bit new to this trying to work it all out, message me! 28 slim and ready to fuck!"

I think you need to put in a bit more effort when it comes to "working it all out"

E

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By *umpkinbumWoman  over a year ago

North Wales


"Well everybody has started with no veris, and is it not better to have no veris? At least you less likely to have aids. I see some people have hundreds and it makes me think ?? ohh god I think I will give that 1 a wide berth thanks"

Wow! That's some statement. Not all verifications are a result of playing, my first ever profile I had a lot from people I'd met in parties and clubs but didn't play I love the social side meeting like-minded people..... And when people do play you'll find a majority respect their health and cover up! I know I certainly do those that don't it's up to them, who are we to judge what others get up to?

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By *emini ManMan  over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"

Listen you argumentative Welsh wonder There's lots of people on here who don't have 100s of veris. There's alot who are varied by cam im just sayin that there's also a few who are veried 100s of times by meets. And to me I would be put off cos I'd think about my sexual health cos none of us want aids. Im not sayin everyone who has lots of meets has aids its just that there's potential there to have some sort of sti. So from my point of view id stay away . Thats my perogative and view of things , if you cant handle that maybe you shouldn't be in a forum where people have diffrent views ??"

You are of course entitled to your way of approaching the site and the people that use it - as you say it's your prerogative entirely.

However to suggest someone who has had lots of meets/sex is more likely to have HIV is somewhat naive and using a skewed logic - although I can see why you might think logically that more sex equates to more potential for exposure.

However without knowing an individual and asking how they approach their sexual health you can't *know* the risk you are taking regardless of the number of sexual partners they've had - you might meet someone who's only ever had 5 sexual partners but barebacked with all of them and never been tested and be at a greater risk than meeting someone with 100 sexual partners who always uses a condom and gets tested every 3 months like clockwork.

You can only truly get an idea of the risk you are placing yourself at by talking to individual people.

Add into that that a lot of people with 100s of veris won't have had sex with those people that verified them as they'll be from social events and your comment becomes even more of a generalisation.

To use my own example - I have 30+ veris but had sex with less than a third of those people, and protected my sexual health with all of them, including getting tested regularly when I was active - so you can see how using the number of veris alone as a guide to likely STI risk is flawed.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Well everybody has started with no veris, and is it not better to have no veris? At least you less likely to have aids. I see some people have hundreds and it makes me think ?? ohh god I think I will give that 1 a wide berth thanks

Wow! That's some statement. Not all verifications are a result of playing, my first ever profile I had a lot from people I'd met in parties and clubs but didn't play I love the social side meeting like-minded people..... And when people do play you'll find a majority respect their health and cover up! I know I certainly do those that don't it's up to them, who are we to judge what others get up to? "

I wasn't judging I was just givin my opinion and if people don't like my opinion and take it out of context then thats there issue. I ain't goin to loosecany sleep over it..iv not got a problem with wot anyone gets up 2. We are all grown adults so if some want to have sex with a select few fair play. If some want to fuk everyone and everyone again that's there choice . All I said was that id stay away from those with 100s of veris and I mean meets not just cam

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Listen you argumentative Welsh wonder There's lots of people on here who don't have 100s of veris. There's alot who are varied by cam im just sayin that there's also a few who are veried 100s of times by meets. And to me I would be put off cos I'd think about my sexual health cos none of us want aids. Im not sayin everyone who has lots of meets has aids its just that there's potential there to have some sort of sti. So from my point of view id stay away . Thats my perogative and view of things , if you cant handle that maybe you shouldn't be in a forum where people have diffrent views ??

You are of course entitled to your way of approaching the site and the people that use it - as you say it's your prerogative entirely.

However to suggest someone who has had lots of meets/sex is more likely to have HIV is somewhat naive and using a skewed logic - although I can see why you might think logically that more sex equates to more potential for exposure.

However without knowing an individual and asking how they approach their sexual health you can't *know* the risk you are taking regardless of the number of sexual partners they've had - you might meet someone who's only ever had 5 sexual partners but barebacked with all of them and never been tested and be at a greater risk than meeting someone with 100 sexual partners who always uses a condom and gets tested every 3 months like clockwork.

You can only truly get an idea of the risk you are placing yourself at by talking to individual people.

Add into that that a lot of people with 100s of veris won't have had sex with those people that verified them as they'll be from social events and your comment becomes even more of a generalisation.

To use my own example - I have 30+ veris but had sex with less than a third of those people, and protected my sexual health with all of them, including getting tested regularly when I was active - so you can see how using the number of veris alone as a guide to likely STI risk is flawed."

Id take my chances with the less veried thanks. And its only my opinion but I think some people don't like you having an opinion of your own. Im not a sheep I have my own thoughts and mind like we all should.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Listen you argumentative Welsh wonder There's lots of people on here who don't have 100s of veris. There's alot who are varied by cam im just sayin that there's also a few who are veried 100s of times by meets. And to me I would be put off cos I'd think about my sexual health cos none of us want aids. Im not sayin everyone who has lots of meets has aids its just that there's potential there to have some sort of sti. So from my point of view id stay away . Thats my perogative and view of things , if you cant handle that maybe you shouldn't be in a forum where people have diffrent views ??

You are of course entitled to your way of approaching the site and the people that use it - as you say it's your prerogative entirely.

However to suggest someone who has had lots of meets/sex is more likely to have HIV is somewhat naive and using a skewed logic - although I can see why you might think logically that more sex equates to more potential for exposure.

However without knowing an individual and asking how they approach their sexual health you can't *know* the risk you are taking regardless of the number of sexual partners they've had - you might meet someone who's only ever had 5 sexual partners but barebacked with all of them and never been tested and be at a greater risk than meeting someone with 100 sexual partners who always uses a condom and gets tested every 3 months like clockwork.

You can only truly get an idea of the risk you are placing yourself at by talking to individual people.

Add into that that a lot of people with 100s of veris won't have had sex with those people that verified them as they'll be from social events and your comment becomes even more of a generalisation.

To use my own example - I have 30+ veris but had sex with less than a third of those people, and protected my sexual health with all of them, including getting tested regularly when I was active - so you can see how using the number of veris alone as a guide to likely STI risk is flawed.

Id take my chances with the less veried thanks. And its only my opinion but I think some people don't like you having an opinion of your own. Im not a sheep I have my own thoughts and mind like we all should. "

Do you need a snickers my dear?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Listen you argumentative Welsh wonder There's lots of people on here who don't have 100s of veris. There's alot who are varied by cam im just sayin that there's also a few who are veried 100s of times by meets. And to me I would be put off cos I'd think about my sexual health cos none of us want aids. Im not sayin everyone who has lots of meets has aids its just that there's potential there to have some sort of sti. So from my point of view id stay away . Thats my perogative and view of things , if you cant handle that maybe you shouldn't be in a forum where people have diffrent views ??

You are of course entitled to your way of approaching the site and the people that use it - as you say it's your prerogative entirely.

However to suggest someone who has had lots of meets/sex is more likely to have HIV is somewhat naive and using a skewed logic - although I can see why you might think logically that more sex equates to more potential for exposure.

However without knowing an individual and asking how they approach their sexual health you can't *know* the risk you are taking regardless of the number of sexual partners they've had - you might meet someone who's only ever had 5 sexual partners but barebacked with all of them and never been tested and be at a greater risk than meeting someone with 100 sexual partners who always uses a condom and gets tested every 3 months like clockwork.

You can only truly get an idea of the risk you are placing yourself at by talking to individual people.

Add into that that a lot of people with 100s of veris won't have had sex with those people that verified them as they'll be from social events and your comment becomes even more of a generalisation.

To use my own example - I have 30+ veris but had sex with less than a third of those people, and protected my sexual health with all of them, including getting tested regularly when I was active - so you can see how using the number of veris alone as a guide to likely STI risk is flawed.

Id take my chances with the less veried thanks. And its only my opinion but I think some people don't like you having an opinion of your own. Im not a sheep I have my own thoughts and mind like we all should.

Do you need a snickers my dear?"

Lol yes please im not feeling myself today

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I've no idea how many veris I should have. I ask not to be veri'd so that I don't look over veri'd for this exact reason. I don't want to reduce my chances of casual sex with ANYONE

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By *ex HolesMan  over a year ago

Up North

Great thread everyone

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 01/11/20 14:24:19]

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Well everybody has started with no veris, and is it not better to have no veris? At least you less likely to have aids. I see some people have hundreds and it makes me think ?? ohh god I think I will give that 1 a wide berth thanks

Unbelievable comment.

E

Disgusting isn’t it?

Yes. Very.

And confusing. Man wants sex. Joins site where sex is available. Complains that people are having too much sex.

I've seen comments like that before. I work on the assumption that they're not getting enough of the sex they signed up for.

Oddly, that attitude is what prevents them from getting the sex.

Funny that.

Some people just filter themselves out.

E

"

And yes I want sex but 1 im not desperate 2 I have standards and 3 I dont want sex with someone whos been banged more times than Tysoe furys sparring partners

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By *irty PrettyWoman  over a year ago

Cardiff


"

And yes I want sex but 1 im not desperate 2 I have standards and 3 I dont want sex with someone whos been banged more times than Tysoe furys sparring partners "

Your attitude really is vile. IT IS A SWINGING SITE, people are here because they like to have sex with multiple partners. Some people have built up those veris over 10 years, meaning the number of veris each year is quite small. And a large number of them are only social anyway. Whereas you have got at least one veri during a pandemic and you feel the need to hide how many you’ve got - what are you hiding exactly? Been shagging around during lockdown? You’re a hypocrite.

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