FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > The hate behind the wink
The hate behind the wink
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By *umstible OP Man
over a year ago
Colindale |
Recently I've come across many profiles adamantly asking that no winks be sent. I fail to understand the reasoning behind this and it would be great if someone could explain.
The way i see it, the wink feature is a blessing lol
Imagine you have a profile that generates much interest (which i do no have lol) and your getting hundreds of messages, most with unsolicited dick pics or one liners etc
Surely, you would rather people just winked at you and then you could decide, after reading their profile, weather you are interested or compatible etc
I dont understand why you would discourage people from using the wink, in my mind it should be the opposite, you should ask people to wink rather then waste their time and yours by sending stuff that 99% (maybe an exaggerated percentage but it makes my point) of the time is not to your taste.
Thoughts? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Or, you get a lot of messages as well as a lot of winks, most people send both. At least a message stands a chance of saying why you rather than "you happen to be female within 50 miles", which is what it can feel like. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Because a wink doesn't light my inbox up. I don't get the same ego boost from winks because I have to click onto a different page to see them and I don't have time for that.
I want to see the number of unread messages constantly highlighted at the top of the page. Currently 3,296 unread. So many men want to fuck me, it's wonderful.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
The assumption Is that most men are interest in nearly all the women on here, a wink isn’t really telling women anything. But women often Use a wink and expect you to message in return, if you wink back they tend not to reply, blokes are expected to all the leg work. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Because a wink doesn't light my inbox up. I don't get the same ego boost from winks because I have to click onto a different page to see them and I don't have time for that.
I want to see the number of unread messages constantly highlighted at the top of the page. Currently 3,296 unread. So many men want to fuck me, it's wonderful. "
So cynical  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *umstible OP Man
over a year ago
Colindale |
"Or, you get a lot of messages as well as a lot of winks, most people send both. At least a message stands a chance of saying why you rather than "you happen to be female within 50 miles", which is what it can feel like."
This is a good point actually maybe im ignorant to the issue on the receiving end of the wink lol
Sometimes i read a profile and become unsure if we match or not, so instead of wasting each parties time typing up a long questionnaire i just wink to let them decide, but if the receiver doesn't see it this way then i get lost in translation basically lol |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I don’t hate them, I just don’t check them. There’s very rarely anyone who winks at me that I’d be interested in so I don’t bother anymore.
Things are a bit different at the minute with the virus and I’m not meeting at all, but even when things were normal I only ever played at parties and never arranged meets through Fab so it’s irrelevant who’s winking really.
It states on my profile that I don’t check winks, so it’s a good way of filtering out people who haven’t been arsed to read it  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Because a wink doesn't light my inbox up. I don't get the same ego boost from winks because I have to click onto a different page to see them and I don't have time for that.
I want to see the number of unread messages constantly highlighted at the top of the page. Currently 3,296 unread. So many men want to fuck me, it's wonderful.
So cynical "
Eh no they want me for real. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *umstible OP Man
over a year ago
Colindale |
"Because a wink doesn't light my inbox up. I don't get the same ego boost from winks because I have to click onto a different page to see them and I don't have time for that.
I want to see the number of unread messages constantly highlighted at the top of the page. Currently 3,296 unread. So many men want to fuck me, it's wonderful. "
An incredible insight into the wonders of having a fire profile.
Solidarity to those with no new winks and no new messages! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I don't mind them and send some too but not sure why some get into a tizz about them, you don't have to look if you aren't interested in people who wink. Don't see why a fuss has to be made. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *umstible OP Man
over a year ago
Colindale |
"I don’t hate them, I just don’t check them. There’s very rarely anyone who winks at me that I’d be interested in so I don’t bother anymore.
Things are a bit different at the minute with the virus and I’m not meeting at all, but even when things were normal I only ever played at parties and never arranged meets through Fab so it’s irrelevant who’s winking really.
It states on my profile that I don’t check winks, so it’s a good way of filtering out people who haven’t been arsed to read it "
Another decent point
All this insight will help me build a irresistible first contact method... hopefully lol |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We prefer a wink to a shit message.
Nobody has to look at their wink list. "
Winks usually lead to shit messages though. If I wink someone most of the time they then think that because I've shown interest they don't have to make any effort in reading my profile or making a good first impression. If they do message after a wink it's usually just "thanks for wink" and never leads anywhere. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Or, you get a lot of messages as well as a lot of winks, most people send both. At least a message stands a chance of saying why you rather than "you happen to be female within 50 miles", which is what it can feel like.
This is a good point actually maybe im ignorant to the issue on the receiving end of the wink lol
Sometimes i read a profile and become unsure if we match or not, so instead of wasting each parties time typing up a long questionnaire i just wink to let them decide, but if the receiver doesn't see it this way then i get lost in translation basically lol"
I’ve done that in the past too, aaant sure if I’d be there type. Met my current FWB because I winked him 2 years ago. So sometimes it does work. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"We prefer a wink to a shit message.
Nobody has to look at their wink list.
Winks usually lead to shit messages though. If I wink someone most of the time they then think that because I've shown interest they don't have to make any effort in reading my profile or making a good first impression. If they do message after a wink it's usually just "thanks for wink" and never leads anywhere. "
If it's that way round then yes, but I was thinking in terms of winks we receive compared with shit messages we receive. If we're interested in somebody who we think might be interested in us we'd write a proper message. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *umstible OP Man
over a year ago
Colindale |
"Or, you get a lot of messages as well as a lot of winks, most people send both. At least a message stands a chance of saying why you rather than "you happen to be female within 50 miles", which is what it can feel like.
This is a good point actually maybe im ignorant to the issue on the receiving end of the wink lol
Sometimes i read a profile and become unsure if we match or not, so instead of wasting each parties time typing up a long questionnaire i just wink to let them decide, but if the receiver doesn't see it this way then i get lost in translation basically lol
I’ve done that in the past too, aaant sure if I’d be there type. Met my current FWB because I winked him 2 years ago. So sometimes it does work. "
Happy to hear the feature works for some the way its intended. I think im getting the jist of the reasoning some have against it. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Winks are underrated..it takes a second, you look at there profile and decide to wink back or not
A well thought out message personalised to the user after reading there profile takes longer than a second, you send it and it gets deleted straight away
Yes you'll say there not interested blah blah blah but it I've sent a well thought polite message id like a no thanks in return.
I know what I'd sooner send |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I think winks are great, and I also think the site could make them a bit more prominent.
As a single male on fab, my inbox is easy to manage, and so is my tally of winks. I was very flattered to receive a wink from a lady who liked something I said on a thread in a forum (you can learn lot about people from their forum antics!). Anyway, I sent her an introductory message... and what's followed has been incredible! What she sees in me I'll never understand, but she is amazing and I'm just a very lucky guy.
Don't underestimate a wink! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *umstible OP Man
over a year ago
Colindale |
"I think winks are great, and I also think the site could make them a bit more prominent.
As a single male on fab, my inbox is easy to manage, and so is my tally of winks. I was very flattered to receive a wink from a lady who liked something I said on a thread in a forum (you can learn lot about people from their forum antics!). Anyway, I sent her an introductory message... and what's followed has been incredible! What she sees in me I'll never understand, but she is amazing and I'm just a very lucky guy.
Don't underestimate a wink!"
Another great use of the feature. One by one we will defeat the winkless crowd lol |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Or, you get a lot of messages as well as a lot of winks, most people send both. At least a message stands a chance of saying why you rather than "you happen to be female within 50 miles", which is what it can feel like."
Best course of action is wink, message & friend request, triples your chance to be noticed |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *umstible OP Man
over a year ago
Colindale |
"Winks are underrated..it takes a second, you look at there profile and decide to wink back or not
A well thought out message personalised to the user after reading there profile takes longer than a second, you send it and it gets deleted straight away
Yes you'll say there not interested blah blah blah but it I've sent a well thought polite message id like a no thanks in return.
I know what I'd sooner send "
What makes a wink much more useful then a well thought out message is this. When used just for introductory purposes it helps both parties save soo much time.
Obviously as some have stated, i guess it can be a nuisance too. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Because a wink doesn't light my inbox up. I don't get the same ego boost from winks because I have to click onto a different page to see them and I don't have time for that.
I want to see the number of unread messages constantly highlighted at the top of the page. Currently 3,296 unread. So many men want to fuck me, it's wonderful.
So cynical
Eh no they want me for real. "
A good chunk of those are mine. I've been sending you a message, once a day, for months (just to be ignored)!
;-)
It's the flush does it for me. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
In reply to the OP
It's probably not a negative thing more along the lines of them having a preference for a well composed message.
Some people on here can get alot of winks and probably one liners too and perceive it as not willing to make an effort. We kind of get it from our own experience.
First impressions count and all that jazz. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *umstible OP Man
over a year ago
Colindale |
"In reply to the OP
It's probably not a negative thing more along the lines of them having a preference for a well composed message.
Some people on here can get alot of winks and probably one liners too and perceive it as not willing to make an effort. We kind of get it from our own experience.
First impressions count and all that jazz. "
I hear that, I'm a true believer in making a good first impression too, i think it goes a long way, but imagine doing the leg work to just get deleted lol not even a thank you or no thanks, can't even be certain if your message was read at times. Hence my go to tool of the wink lol
But as far as this thread goes, one can make an argument for both sides and i understand that much better now x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *umstible OP Man
over a year ago
Colindale |
"Or, you get a lot of messages as well as a lot of winks, most people send both. At least a message stands a chance of saying why you rather than "you happen to be female within 50 miles", which is what it can feel like.
Best course of action is wink, message & friend request, triples your chance to be noticed "
This seems like worrying behaviour lol good luck to those who are wreckless to do as much x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
We will occasionally (but very rarely) reply to a wink.
We will look at the profile and if the sender fits what we want and is either in, or the profile says that the sender is visiting, our area then we will reply.
However the vast majority have obviously not even read beyond the first line of our profile so they get binned. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I like to receive a wink on here just as much as I like receiving them in public. It's a nice gesture. I use the wink function on here regular. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesnt. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
D.
Lu 