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I was thinking...
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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What if the uncertainty of life with the new coronavirus could be one of the best things to ever happen to us?
We all love to be in control of life and destiny and covid has removed that from most people. It is the issue under-neath so many of the issues that block and hamper and derail us.
But what if this is exactly what most of us need a natural derailment that causes us to rethink our values and what is most important.
What if, when we tell the story of our life in old age, and people asked what it was that made us who we are, we say, living through 2020?
I know it'll be impossible to say, but most of us by now have made changes to our lifestyles as we've had to adjust, so what good life changes have you made, physical, mental, emotional or even spiritual, that you think are going to help make 2020 a positive year in your life?
I'll start. I ring my parents and my children at least once a week (does not include daily WhatsApp). As a result though I always said we were close, we're very much closer now.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I agree with this. Hard as it's been, I've come to some personal realisations that will make 2021 very different for me. Good can come from hard times."
Any changes that you think might help? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Dangerous but go on 
If we only look at the negative, we bring more not only on to ourselves but also to though around us.
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i didnt read the op it was about the thinking part  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Naaa i was right the first time covid has totally ruined my life dont feel closer to anyone im completely distant with family i will never call it a blessing its taken all my joy from me and left me an emoty angry hateful shell trying to laugh thru the rage at the bullshit world |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm the same mess I've always been. Maybe that period of evaluation is still to kick in for me? "
It's never too late, but earlier the better.
Self-employed, lost just about everything, had to sell van, but got it back as a daughter went and bought it back, sold tools and motorbike to pay off bills in the first lockdown. Not a penny help from the government and this year will be a loss as for as state pension goes. I'm back working a few days a week with jobs I could do without my normal tools. I'll be back and a lesson learnt that things aren't to be held on to tightly. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Naaa i was right the first time covid has totally ruined my life dont feel closer to anyone im completely distant with family i will never call it a blessing its taken all my joy from me and left me an emoty angry hateful shell trying to laugh thru the rage at the bullshit world "
The change is in your hands for most of what you've described though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Naaa i was right the first time covid has totally ruined my life dont feel closer to anyone im completely distant with family i will never call it a blessing its taken all my joy from me and left me an emoty angry hateful shell trying to laugh thru the rage at the bullshit world
The change is in your hands for most of what you've described though."
eh ok jesus  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I agree with this. Hard as it's been, I've come to some personal realisations that will make 2021 very different for me. Good can come from hard times.
Any changes that you think might help?"
Oh yes, definitely  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I agree with this. Hard as it's been, I've come to some personal realisations that will make 2021 very different for me. Good can come from hard times.
Any changes that you think might help?
Oh yes, definitely "
Spidey? If so welcome back. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Try telling that to people who have lost family members, friends and colleagues. No I disagree totally if people want to make changes they don’t need a pandemic to do that |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Iv had more time and used it to do things iv been putting off.
Iv Actually had more contact with my family and Actually I enjoyed the fact that life was less busy and slower paced. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Try telling that to people who have lost family members, friends and colleagues. No I disagree totally if people want to make changes they don’t need a pandemic to do that "
I've actually learnd a lot about myself during lockdown and there has been some positives that doesn't mean that I don't sympathise with people and I've lost people but we should always look for positives surely. Yes times are hard so surely that's the time more than ever to look for whatever positive things there are. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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The negatives are obvious, they fill up much of the forum posts and people seem to feed off them. The point of this is to move away from those and look at some of the positives which I think most just overlook with the gloom and doom that's everywhere. Just because some look and see positives in no way means they overlook the pain and suffering that others are facing. What they are doing is maybe looking at a more balanced picture and not overlooking the positives which many seem to be ignoring.
Be more specific and share some positives that have happened. It may just help someone else. |
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It's certainly made me realise who and what I really miss, and who are the most important people in my life...I'm quite ashamed to say that some weren't the people that I prioritised before the pandemic hit 
It's also given me an even greater appreciation of the simple things...yes,people I know, I will hug you even more when the lurgy has gone  |
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This is more in the place I'm living now (south east asia) and thus not sure how relevant it is to the UK/Europe but the positives include:
1. The light industry (traditional/ village products) are forced into online marketing now. They don't even bother to do this before covid, so it's a good thing.
2. People are more disciplined - queueing, waiting for their turn etc. Better crowd control.
3. Work from home. This is quite rare in this country before covid. They're spending more time with their family.
4. Hotel prices are cheaper. Good for the customer but surely a negative for the hotel/ industry.
As I said, the negatives far outweigh the positive though - especially economically. |
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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago
Northampton Somewhere |
"The negatives are obvious, they fill up much of the forum posts and people seem to feed off them. The point of this is to move away from those and look at some of the positives which I think most just overlook with the gloom and doom that's everywhere. Just because some look and see positives in no way means they overlook the pain and suffering that others are facing. What they are doing is maybe looking at a more balanced picture and not overlooking the positives which many seem to be ignoring.
Be more specific and share some positives that have happened. It may just help someone else."
Its so important to find a positive in amongst all this crap. Personally I've loved spending more time with my family, I reconnected with some relatives which I wish I'd done a long time ago!
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"This is more in the place I'm living now (south east asia) and thus not sure how relevant it is to the UK/Europe but the positives include:
1. The light industry (traditional/ village products) are forced into online marketing now. They don't even bother to do this before covid, so it's a good thing.
2. People are more disciplined - queueing, waiting for their turn etc. Better crowd control.
3. Work from home. This is quite rare in this country before covid. They're spending more time with their family.
4. Hotel prices are cheaper. Good for the customer but surely a negative for the hotel/ industry.
As I said, the negatives far outweigh the positive though - especially economically."
Those are quite interesting changes and yes probably all good.
I work in India a lot, over 16 years now. One change I'd seen in the past 5 years is the high rise in hotel prices, so much so that they had more than doubled in that time. Many big industries have had it quite good for a very long time, and what we often forget is that when this happens, there are many who pay for that price and it costs in other ways. I never saw basic wages rise much but the rich got richer. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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A few things I've done and some are ongoing.
Trimming all the lists on social media. I need to adjust my online activities and what I'm exposed to in order to ensure that I don't feel drained. Apart from a lot of wasted time that could be better used elsewhere. Fab included.
Unsubscribing from advertisement emails.
Making lists of things that need to be done and set deadlines for them to make my living space more peaceful and orderly.
Prioritizing activities that promote my overall well-being in my daily routine and carving out time for them instead of giving them only leftover time which often means no time.
Making time to connect with family and friends. Already mentioned in apening comments. This is what I need to work on and improve a lot.
Acknowledging my emotional and physical limits so that I don't get to a point of feeling like just shutting down. Getting motivated to restart business was almost an insurmountable mountain. If it wasn't for action of my daughter with the van I doubt I'd have returned.
Quality over quantity even moreso than before. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There has been some good to come out of it. The people forming local groups to help others has been great. They are ramping up again ready for Thursday.
Great thread OP. There's always sunshine and rainbows after a storm. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"There has been some good to come out of it. The people forming local groups to help others has been great. They are ramping up again ready for Thursday.
Great thread OP. There's always sunshine and rainbows after a storm. "
Thanks.
Not many seem to see any positives. Bit of a boring topic it would seem compared to conspiracies and kick the crap out of everything that's happening threads.
Hoping it triggers some to rethink. If one does its been worth posting. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There has been some good to come out of it. The people forming local groups to help others has been great. They are ramping up again ready for Thursday.
Great thread OP. There's always sunshine and rainbows after a storm.
Thanks.
Not many seem to see any positives. Bit of a boring topic it would seem compared to conspiracies and kick the crap out of everything that's happening threads.
Hoping it triggers some to rethink. If one does its been worth posting."
Hope you don't take it personally. I think some people are feeling so low they can't see any light at the end of the tunnel.
I am still looking for positives. |
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Definitely positives. You appreciate so much more the simpler things in life; my son & I were close anyway but these last 7-8 months we’ve got even closer and learnt so much more about each other. Yes we’ve had tears and down days but we’ve also had a lot of laughter. I’ve had to learn chemistry and Spanish to help him with his work, although my Spanish pronunciation is a bit like an allo allo episode
I haven’t had a job all year, as took redundancy in December and honestly don’t know when I’ll get another one. However, I’m not letting it get me down, last year I would have been stressing over it and it would have took control, but now it’s really not worth it. I can’t do much about it, so no point worrying about it.
Plus I’ve not had a drink now for over 7 months, if I can pack in the cigs as well that would be great.
It’s also given me something I really wasn’t expecting or thought I wanted, so that has been a beautiful surprise and will change 2021 and beyond for the better. |
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"There has been some good to come out of it. The people forming local groups to help others has been great. They are ramping up again ready for Thursday.
Great thread OP. There's always sunshine and rainbows after a storm.
Thanks.
Not many seem to see any positives. Bit of a boring topic it would seem compared to conspiracies and kick the crap out of everything that's happening threads.
Hoping it triggers some to rethink. If one does its been worth posting."
Some of us genuinely can't see anything positive unfortunately, no, and it can be frustrating to constantly be reminded how "wonderful" it is to have more time at home etc. For some of us, being forced to live and work in the same space with your usual social/exercise mechanisms unavailable/banned is a form of torture. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If you fear death, in time you will fear life itself.
Major traumatic events have a habit of not just changing people, but society itself. (For example, in America 9/11 changed things massively, such as a huge increase in divorce rates.) The world we live in won't return to a normal that we knew pre-covid.
I've lost people during this whole unpredictable and horrible experience. Its made me make changes to my life some of which a very significant (and won't be posted here, but known to my closest friends) and others are simply ending procrastination about things and getting on. It's reaffirmed some of my strongest beliefs, and reminded me of the the transient nature of life.
There are shadows in life, it's not always black and white. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If you fear death, in time you will fear life itself.
Major traumatic events have a habit of not just changing people, but society itself. (For example, in America 9/11 changed things massively, such as a huge increase in divorce rates.) The world we live in won't return to a normal that we knew pre-covid.
I've lost people during this whole unpredictable and horrible experience. Its made me make changes to my life some of which a very significant (and won't be posted here, but known to my closest friends) and others are simply ending procrastination about things and getting on. It's reaffirmed some of my strongest beliefs, and reminded me of the the transient nature of life.
There are shadows in life, it's not always black and white."
Good post. Yes always shadows and it's what we do with the pieces that can dictated where we go from that point. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"There has been some good to come out of it. The people forming local groups to help others has been great. They are ramping up again ready for Thursday.
Great thread OP. There's always sunshine and rainbows after a storm.
Thanks.
Not many seem to see any positives. Bit of a boring topic it would seem compared to conspiracies and kick the crap out of everything that's happening threads.
Hoping it triggers some to rethink. If one does its been worth posting.
Hope you don't take it personally. I think some people are feeling so low they can't see any light at the end of the tunnel.
I am still looking for positives. "
Oh I fully understand that, been there. Remember someone saying, the light is there, we're just not at the point where we can see it, but it's there.
I've a chair I sit it all the time. I've never once wondered if it will hold my weight. Even the first time, I just sat in it without a thought.
Hugs and may the light be seen soon. |
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