FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Don't hold em in!
Don't hold em in!
Jump to: Newest in thread
Yesterday at work I had terrible heartburn, it's been a while since I've had it.
So, I did that thing where I wondered what caused it coz I'd not eaten anything spicy or different. It was just a normal working day where I couldn't think of anything I had done, or was doing differently.
Until I needed to fart that is, and held yet another one because unlike normal, my rectum trumpet could have been mistaken for the bog of eternal stench from Labyrinth.
I thought "naaaaaaaaaaaah"
I thought "I fucking wonder"
Then "naaaaaaaaaaaaah"
So I googled and I have to say I was eyes wide and the result.
Holding in your farts CAN give you heartburn!!
Let em out people.... set them free.
You're welcome. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Yesterday at work I had terrible heartburn, it's been a while since I've had it.
So, I did that thing where I wondered what caused it coz I'd not eaten anything spicy or different. It was just a normal working day where I couldn't think of anything I had done, or was doing differently.
Until I needed to fart that is, and held yet another one because unlike normal, my rectum trumpet could have been mistaken for the bog of eternal stench from Labyrinth.
I thought "naaaaaaaaaaaah"
I thought "I fucking wonder"
Then "naaaaaaaaaaaaah"
So I googled and I have to say I was eyes wide and the result.
Holding in your farts CAN give you heartburn!!
Let em out people.... set them free.
You're welcome."
If I had read the first post without checking who the OP was , I would have known it was you straight away  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Women’s farts fucking stink as well  "
Mine are normally all bark and no bite. However I found eating red meat gives me the stinkers, as does being on the blob.
Apparently woman bum-burps contain more hydrogen sulfide which makes them smell.
Of course it mainly comes down to diet |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Women’s farts fucking stink as well
Mine are normally all bark and no bite. However I found eating red meat gives me the stinkers, as does being on the blob.
Apparently woman bum-burps contain more hydrogen sulfide which makes them smell.
Of course it mainly comes down to diet"
It’s Indian food for me. Takes at least 24hrs to clear meself out as well  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"This is the sort of useful knowledge the Lounge should be filled with. Thank you Op. "
Could be a game changer for those who can't work out the cause of their indigestion or heartburn.
Never see gaviscon advertising people to let their farts out do ya? They won't make any money off the natural remedy!! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
 |
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"This is the sort of useful knowledge the Lounge should be filled with. Thank you Op.
Could be a game changer for those who can't work out the cause of their indigestion or heartburn.
Never see gaviscon advertising people to let their farts out do ya? They won't make any money off the natural remedy!!"
Do you like to smell yours?? Xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"This is the sort of useful knowledge the Lounge should be filled with. Thank you Op.
Could be a game changer for those who can't work out the cause of their indigestion or heartburn.
Never see gaviscon advertising people to let their farts out do ya? They won't make any money off the natural remedy!!
Do you like to smell yours?? Xx"
I can't say I do.
They don't usually whiff tho.
Noisy - definitely
Smelly - not really, maybe one a week that catches me by surprise if that.
Pre-poop period fart is something else tho, those cunts make me want to bleach myself from the inside out |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
My daughter done one in the aisle in Asda yesterday. I said you can’t do that in public, it was honking as well, felt like I was chewing on it. Good job people had masks on. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I do need to clear something up, I've possibly through Tooting maybe twice in my life.
I even say in my profile text right up the top that I live nowhere near there, it's just the sound my bumhole sings |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I do need to clear something up, I've possibly through Tooting maybe twice in my life.
I even say in my profile text right up the top that I live nowhere near there, it's just the sound my bumhole sings "
So you don't sound like Pingu then? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I do need to clear something up, I've possibly through Tooting maybe twice in my life.
I even say in my profile text right up the top that I live nowhere near there, it's just the sound my bumhole sings
So you don't sound like Pingu then? "
You ever been to a really loud gig and you can feel the base in your chest?  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I do need to clear something up, I've possibly through Tooting maybe twice in my life.
I even say in my profile text right up the top that I live nowhere near there, it's just the sound my bumhole sings
So you don't sound like Pingu then?
You ever been to a really loud gig and you can feel the base in your chest? "
I remember discos in junior school making my chest pound, nowadays its been stood next to large diesel engines running that makes my chest vibrate |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I do need to clear something up, I've possibly through Tooting maybe twice in my life.
I even say in my profile text right up the top that I live nowhere near there, it's just the sound my bumhole sings
So you don't sound like Pingu then?
You ever been to a really loud gig and you can feel the base in your chest?
I remember discos in junior school making my chest pound, nowadays its been stood next to large diesel engines running that makes my chest vibrate"
Yeah, well it's a bit like that |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Apparently in Germany it's not considered rude to fart in public and most don't bat an eyelid doing it?
Correct me if i'm wrong please  "
 I must be part German.
I say that.
What I meant is I'M good to fart in public, but other people not so much.
Other people need to go to the woods or something.
Smelly beasts |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
All these couples who say "we've never farted in front of each other, it's disrespectful" but now realise they've been listening to each other moan about indigestion for years too!
Poor sods have literally been causing themselves pain to protect show respect or whatnot.
Then the first one to fall asleep keeps the other one awake with orchestral manoeuvres in the dark anyway, they just don't know it |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"This thread has brightened my data blighted day. Thank you, Princess Peach
You're very welcome.
Science can be fun right? "
Science is fun. Crunching numbers on staff utilisation and efficiency is NOT fun  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"This thread has brightened my data blighted day. Thank you, Princess Peach
You're very welcome.
Science can be fun right?
Science is fun. Crunching numbers on staff utilisation and efficiency is NOT fun "
Yay hourly efficiency charts and spread sheets, pointless BS emails  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"This thread has brightened my data blighted day. Thank you, Princess Peach
You're very welcome.
Science can be fun right?
Science is fun. Crunching numbers on staff utilisation and efficiency is NOT fun
Yay hourly efficiency charts and spread sheets, pointless BS emails "
This is "am I squeezing every last second" out of my teaching staff and how can we do more with less to be 200% efficient, because 100% isn't enough
I still have 128 emails after having a few days off........ |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"If i hold in i do an internal fart also did you know if you sit on your shoulders feet in the air you can suck in air with your arse and fart a tune? 
Mr methane was famous for that "
Ever seen the Leonard Rossister film Le Petomane, based on the French performer Joseph Pujol? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Women’s farts fucking stink as well
Mine are normally all bark and no bite. However I found eating red meat gives me the stinkers, as does being on the blob.
Apparently woman bum-burps contain more hydrogen sulfide which makes them smell.
Of course it mainly comes down to diet"
Eating chocolate makes my farts stink. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"This thread has brightened my data blighted day. Thank you, Princess Peach
You're very welcome.
Science can be fun right?
Science is fun. Crunching numbers on staff utilisation and efficiency is NOT fun
Yay hourly efficiency charts and spread sheets, pointless BS emails
This is "am I squeezing every last second" out of my teaching staff and how can we do more with less to be 200% efficient, because 100% isn't enough
I still have 128 emails after having a few days off........ "
Yeah management like to sweat the assets don't they.
My company operates 24/7 I get around 90 per day, so after my rest days I have close to 400 to check before I start my shift  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
